The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
anyone here having problems with food and compulsively over eating? struggling with balance in life? i am. I just need to hear how other's handle this part of life as well as everything else posted here. I need some help. thank you.
I'm ACoA (adult child of alcoholic/addict) and spent most of my life starving myself b/c it was one thing I could control and I could take my anger out on me simultaneously.
In the last 8 years I have gained sixty pounds. I've read that starving and over eating are stemming from the same thing, that they are essentially the same. I have always been obsessive, out of control and lacking balance in my life.
Two years ago, I decided to love myself. I had so little love for me, it felt like it was 1/4 of 1%. Simply focusing on myself was a collosal task that I felt inept at but it's getting better. This year, I have actually experienced some feelings of detachment and it is a wonderful, liberating experience.
When I was thin, I was hated myself and I loathed my body. I decided to embrace myself where I am, figuring if I can love myself for who and what I am now, perhaps I will begin to get some balance. I am happier and able to accept myself these days but it has taken a long two years of daily work. I can say it does get better. I would like to lose some of the weight I gained, just so my health & life will be better but I am no longer obsessing about it. On the days when I work out or lift some weights, even if it is only 5 minutes I feel better and can do more the next day. I keep reminding myself to go slowly and do just a little bit at a time.
It took me a long time to gain all of this weight, it would be unrealistic (& unhealthy) to expect myself to take it off too quickly. I over eat when I am upset but the more weight I gained the worse I felt about myself, it became a vicious cycle.
I have given up on being a certain wieght or size, I want to be able to be strong enough to have a good life and to do the things I want to do... for me this is an attitude of balance ( I was an athelete when I was younger & I was very extreme & black & white in my thinking). At forty, I just want to be happy and peace of mind. This is where I am right now, today.
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Light, Love, Peace, Blessings & Healing to Us All. God's Will Be Done. Amen.
Thank you for your post. Thank you for the people who help, as always. Your post helped me. So much of what you said I understand. How do you learn to love yourself? I would love to speak with you privately.
I"m currently on a diet exercise regimen and I have become obsessed with it. So the problem is I lost a lot of weight at once and then weeks with no loss. My group at that site informs me that my body thinks it's starving and I need to eat more... I'm over 100lbs overweight... the idea of eating more is mind boggling! So I too have no patience and want to lose all this weight NOW but I am trying to adjust my thinking to long term rather than fast loss. It's hard, I want it now, I had plans and my body is not cooperating! I never EVER thought that it would be possible to be eating too few calories!!!
