The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I've always had difficulty in that I had the all or nothing attitude.
I know I will do well in college; I already am.
Would I like to have a 4.0 GPA? You bet!
Is that realistic for me? No.
The only requirement I have in my contract with Vocational Rehabilitation is that I keep at least a C average, which I have always maintained a B or higher, even in high school.
Today I had to take a quiz in my Intro to Health Information, and I 'bombed' it, got a C.
I managed to give myself a headache and walked around emotionally beating myself up because I've gotten all B's on my other quizzes and chapter tests.
Gads, old habits/thinking do die hard, don't they?
I always have this fear that if I quit setting such high standards for myself, at least in the area of academics, that I'll end up being lazy.
Needless to say, my spiritual contact with my higher power was zilch whilst I was busy flogging on myself!
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"If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience." - Woodrow Wilson
I am glad it sounds like you know to put the club down by now
As I learned in therapy, where & when did this thought come from and does it still work for you now?
"I always have this fear that if I quit setting such high standards for myself, at least in the area of academics, that I'll end up being lazy."
I was amazed at some rules I had for myself that I learned from various folks or places that as an adult or as just me being me, I don't agree with now that I think about it.
From one boomer to another, going to school now does not seem like it would ever be part of the defition of lazy and a C is not bombing it except you never saw a D or E or F....... Be easy on yourself.
hugs of support, ddub
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"Choices are the hinges of destiny." Pythagoras You can't change the past, but you can change the future.
THSKS, yeah, I hear you. When I was in school I decided that I was going to work my butt off to get a B in one of my classes (I had gotten A's in all the other ones so far). It was a bit of reverse psychology I wanted to try on myself. It worked really well!! I did get a B in that class! It was a personal challenge to NOT be perfect and be gentle with myself in not being perfect. It was a great exercise in letting go. Hugs, J.
I once knew somone in med school and there was a saying in his class.... "Do you know what they call the guy who graduates bottom of his class?" ....... DOCTOR!
Remember, as long as you perform adequately and get that degree, in the end what will ultimately matter is your tenacity, how you relate to others, ablility to take direction, willingness to learn, you know, all that good stuff you have learned going through the school of life. I can speak from my and my AH's grad school experiences that the ones who ended up graduating at the top of the class did not necessarlily end up the most "successful".
You are going to do great!
Blessings, Lou
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Every new day begins with new possibilities. It's up to us to fill it with the things that move us toward progress and peace. ~ Ronald Reagan~
Sometimes what you want to do has to fail, so you won't ~Marguerite Bro~
So it is true what they say in the program...Expectations are future resentments. Go figure!! Put the hammer down and give your self the kind of hug you would give someone else.
