The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Tomorrow is my birthday, I will be 44yrs old. All week long my abf has been asking me what I wanted to do for my special day. All week long, I havent been able to give him an answer. He suggested we go kayaking, as this is something I love to do. I told him maybe...as he kept suggesting, I kept giving maybes. Tonight I was talking with a coworker, we had tried to plan to go out together tonight, but it didnt happen. I then asked her what she was doing tomorrow. She explained to me about an old recreation area in a nearby town that her son and his Scout troop were clearing out and rebuilding and that she would be there for most of the day....I knew then that I had the answer to what I wanted to do for my birthday. She is picking me up at 8:00 am tomorrow and I am going to help build a new playground and picnic area! I cant think of anything else I would rather do, nothing that would make the day more special. My A is kind of upset that I am going and suggested that since he is a carpenter maybe he could come too. I honestly dont want him there. I havent said that to him, but I think he knows. I hope he can understand, and I hope it doesnt blow up in my face....but it is something I feel I have to do...for me. So on that note, its time for me to say goodnight and get some rest, cuz I am gonna be one busy birthday girl! seeking peace, jeannie
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if you bring forth what is within you, what is within you will save you
Just a thought . . . if you are honest with your ABF that will help. He may still be disappointed but at least he won't be wondering and hanging on waiting for you to come to a decision. IMHO, that's the nicest way being honest.
In the meantime, don't forget to eats lottsa
yours in recovery, Maria
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If I am not for me, who will be? If I am only for myself, then who am I? If not now, when?
A very Happy Birthday to you!!!! Sounds like you will be in for a lot of work, but it will be very rewarding to you as well.
Kudos to you for deciding to do what YOU want to do. While your ABF may end up being angry you have to be true to yourself. This is your day.
I have learned that my AH will usually do what HE wants to do. Until only recently, I never put my own needs and wants first. Problem was, I would resent it. Now that I have come to respect my own needs, I find that I am able to cope with his needing to do what he wants.
Enjoy your Birthday!!!!
Love,
Claudia
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A person's a person no matter how small --Dr Suess
44 years young and soooo much wiser. Keep working your program that way and miracles will continue to happen. What a concept; instead of getting you're giving away. Of course you will be getting back but still.... You get the idea.
Good for you. I allowed the A who I was with to ruin many a birthday and a holiday. I never did get them right. I admire your tenancity and patience in waiting to hear what the real adventure was gong to be.
