(((( hugs dianab ))))  Welcome to the forum. As phebe said, the chat room is great, you can immediately talk to others who will understand & relate to what you're going through. Also, there are two online meetings daily. The mtg times are posted at the top of the chat room page or just ask anyone.
   I looked at the main www.al-anon.alateen.org web site & found the meeting list for your area, you can see where they are:   http://www.dallasal-anon.org/meeting_list.php

Get a beginner's packet and any other pamphlets that you may be interested in. Studying the literature can help you see how you play a role in the disease. We are only as sick as our secrets & I am sorry the whole family was lying to you. We sometimes think we are protecting others & have good intentions that backfire. People do the best with the ionformation they have at the time, getting informed will help tremendously.
  
I lived with a coaine abuser for a year. I never knew he was on it b/c he always was, that was his 'normal'. After he went to rehab & we had broken up, he'd said he kept it in his car & in the basement. I felt dumb for not knowing but the truth is they are Master Manipulators, the are good at hiding, lying, covering up.

How much a person takes is up to them, we all have to get to our own epiphany about it. We say when you are truly sick & tired of being sick & tired, you will make changes. It comes down to self-worth & boundaries. I grew up with drug use (ACoA), lived with addicts, married & divorced an addict. They are everywhere, functioning & blending right in. I've realized addicts arent just pill popping, they are gamblers, sex addicts, food, work, excersize, you name it you can find someone using it to escape their feelings. They use their 'drug of choice' to be numb & not deal with reality.

Even though you may think you are done with your AH, I urge you to get help in dealing with your own emotions & issues b/c even if you leave your current situation your feelings & attitdes will stay with you. My most recent lesson in al-anon is learning how to love myself & focus on me. I never put myself first & at 40 am beginning to detach from others, consider me & live for me. I am gaining peace for the first time ever. I have been hurt, hopeless, suicidal (yes, I even tried) but I am still here to say, it gets better and there is hope.

You can do it & you are worth it.

Thanks for the two emails that were sent to me. Right now I feel so alone and I'm in totally shock that I was so blind to it all.

Hi Diana,

Just so you know you really are not alone... My AH was on drugs (opiates/narcotics) for about 10 years, and I had no idea. I had just come to accept that i was married to a jerk. Yeah, I knew his drinking had escalated, but didn't know to label it. It was very covert, mostly just social, and then away from home. Didn't find out or realize he was an alcoholic until about 48 hrs before he went to rehab. Many other secrets came to light at that time too. I know the shock and disbelief well. Denial is an incredibly powerful thing.

I commend you, as you are far and beyond where I was upon my discovery. I am so glad you found al-anon now. I encourage you to embrace it and learn all you can about alcoholism and what you can do to save you. Get to as many meetings as you can. You can't expect anything from him. Rehab is only the beginning of a whole new journey. If they have any family programs, I encourage you and his family to go, as they are quite educational. When my AH was in rehab, they strongly suggested the A not to go home after rehab but into a sober living environment. I get that now.

The family thing... ugh... bottom line, they don't understand and don't want him to be a drug addict or alcoholic. Sounds like they figured something out though by getting him into rehab, and that's a good thing.

Keep coming back, Diana. You can do this.

Blessings,
Lou