The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Our son showed up at our church for an 11 am preschool meeting for his daughter. He had a clear liquid that he was drinking from a grape Gatorade bottle. He pretended that it was water but his attitude and the odor told me differently. No, I didn't confront him. I was just very embarressed but never said anything to him about it.
I don't drink and don't know anything about liquor. What could he have been drinking?
hi page, in alanon we learn to focus away from what they do. for me I feel it is none of my business. I cannot do anything anyway and it is no reflection on me.
Hon it could be many things. Lots of them like to pretend vodka does not smell. My AH would get orange juice and put it in there. He probably put it in gatorade too.
I am sorry your son is so sick. Sadly we cannot do anything, they know what they are doing.
keep coming, read literature. canadian guy is giving a great book away. He is up there on top of the message board.Meetings will help too.
I spent a good part of my life wondering what was drinking my ex husband, trying to smell his breath, examining him from the corner of my eyes...all things (I start to realise) which were useless.
At the end, even if I did know what he was drinking or that he had been drinking, it did not change anything. I was just stressing myself out, worrying/getting angry uselessly. At best, a little satisfied voice was going on in my head 'here, I knew it', not that it made feel better.
I understand about your embarressement and I am sorry you have to go through with it. This is one part, I never managed to resolve except by not going out anymore (not a good choice I recognised).
Al Anon does help. It is nice to come to a place where people can understand you without being judged that you have a simple question/doubt or just need to rent.
I used to worry about what my step father (qualifier) was drinking all the time.Then I learned that it was none of my business.I needed to concentrate on me and me alone. Everyone talks about how the way a child acts is a direct reflection on the parent. I think that is total BS. I have kids in the Alateen meeting that I sponsor that are going to grow up to be excellent contributors to society. Their parent on the other hand has been in and out of rehab and halfway houses more times than I can count.
You are your own person. He is his own person. His actions speak for himself. Your actions (not reactions) speak for yourself. Period.
