The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Finally, after pushing myself, and I mean really pushing myself, I was going to attend my 1st face to face this evening. And the whole way there, I was thinking........... This bites that I have to get out of my cozy house and go to this meeting. Ugh...I don't want to have to walk in there. This is crazy, I am a grown woman and I need this. Honestly, I was also blaming my A Mom and A Hubby for having this disease and making me get out in this weather to go to a meeting so I can learn to fix myself. But I accepted that this meeting is where I need to be. "i thought"...Anyway.... I get there, nervously get out of the car and walk up the ten thousand steps only to find a locked door. Was I in the wrong place???? I started to go back downstairs and I noticed all the trucks in the parking lot. And then my little girlie shiney white car. MY MY, I must be the only girl here...can't be I thought. Girls drive trucks too right? I used to have one myself. But in my gut I knew...something is not right here. I walked toward the rear entrance of the building...I began to hear the deep voices and then saw a big cloud of smoke and then confimed my suspesion...ALL MEN. Now I am not afraid of men by any means, but I tured around and made a run for it straight back to my car. Yep, I left. A little ways down the road, I started to think...I let the evil one win, I backed down just as soon as I was doing something good. After talking to my friend, I found out that I was at an AA meeting and not an Alanon meeting. With a sigh of relief, I realized that my HP knew that I was not ready today for my first face to face. So, I'll try again Wednesday. Go Figure...LOL!
Yup, that was my first meeting too I sat down though and was very nervous Very boisterous group and a lot of folks After the first share, I caught on that I was at AA I quietly left the room, quickly. I ran into someone though in the hall who directed me to the house next door for al anon sat down with 6 quiet ladies that time, now it can be a few or a lot, quiet or louder at al anon f2f keep going back, it has been a lifesaver for me
hugs, ddub
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"Choices are the hinges of destiny." Pythagoras You can't change the past, but you can change the future.
It's not unusual for AA and alanon to share a space - AA usually gets the big room, and alanon is off in some little side room (hmmmm...) At one meeting I go to like this, the As are pretty good at spotting the alanons and sending them along downstairs to us.
Actually, it's pretty funny - most of the alanon meetings I go to are small. The AA meetings are large, about 60/40 ratio men/women, with a big urn of coffee, a kinda sullen atmosphere, and until fairly recently, a thick blue haze of smoke. Down the hall in alanon, there are a few women around a table, with a kettle, a variety of teas and hot chocolates, and an about even mix of tears and laughter. Two different meetings I've gone to, where I've been at the open AA meeting for some reason rather than the alanon, in a lull in the AA meeting, you could hear alanon laughing their heads off down the hall.
I like going to the odd AA meeting - I always learn something that I need to learn. Sure feel more at home at alanon, though.
I'm proud of you for trying . I haven't made it that far yet but will at some point and I can see myself getting back into the car and leaving even though I know where the alanon meetings are (in the same building as the AA meetings here).
I have heard people from AA talk about "how noisy the alanon women are" and that they laugh a lot. AA meetings I've been to seemed kinda gloomy to me, and so many people. But I went in there with my A. I would have never had the courage to go there by myself.
I just had to share with you. My first face to face (or what should have been), I got there drove through the parking lot and drove home. LOL! It was an alanon meeting, I just didn't stop for it. I did make it through the door the next week and many weeks after. I just got a smile out of your share. Hope you find the next one!
. I haven't made it that far yet but will at some point and I can see myself getting back into the car and leaving even though I know where the alanon meetings are (in the same building as the AA meetings here).
