The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Last night I had this horrible dream that someone I know that I haven't seen in many years tried to rape me. When he was not able to get my clothes off he held me so I couldn't move in front of him. He got himself off my rubbing on my back and it was disgusting. I screamed which woke me up and woke up my bf. I told him what happened and he held me tight, comforting me. This was the first time in a long time that he actually made me feel loved and feel that he cared about me since he quit drinking 3 months ago. I didn't feel alone for once. Some people believe that dreams reflect out lives or emotions. I have no idea why I had that horrible dream. I just needed to get that off my chest. Thank you for listening.
I have had the rape dream also, my personal opinion is the feeling you get from the dream, I felt trapped. It made me really think about my trapped feelings and I worked on it and discovered that, I was doing it too myself, I know now that I have freedoms and choices and I live my life that way and nobody can interfere with that, specifically the A. Luv, Bettina
I have come to learn that dreams are the subconscious metaphors for what is happening in our lives...mind, body, spirit and emotions. They tell us the story and can be very revealing especially for me. If you get thru the fear of it and quietly spend time looking at your dreams in relationship to events and feelings that have gone on with you or are going on with you and most important you know yourself...You will be able to decipher that dream and find more under- standing.
And yes...alcoholics have the capacity and ability and time to be compassionate and loving just like many other human beings. I have found men are less into feelings, until they learn how and how important, than women. Men usually come from their heads; women from their hearts. I was told and then led in early program to get in touch with my "female side". Yuuuuuck! was my first reaction. I don't wanna! Why? You can't make me!! Wrong I was around many women in program who where outgrowing me and then had a counselor at the VA alcoholism center who worked with mens emotions/feelings. Now I know something very very important in my life today. "Feeling are the inward reaction to an outside event."
Outside event...being raped. Inward reaction fear, terror, confusions, rejection, hurt, pain etc. There's more and I will share that with you if you want by personal message.
I had no idea that my dream would be related to fear in my life. This dream was so extreme. This was the first time I have ever had this kind of dream but I will try to relate it to what's going on. It is disturbing to me that it might be a reaction to what's going on. The very strange part is who the person was. This guy used to be my friend and much later I found out that he was crazy about me. He told me that he only dated the friend that was staying at my house at the time so he could be around me. He got upset once where I told him in an email that I was going on vacation and he sent me back a very nasty email, freaking me out. I called his mom about it who said she would talk to him, and I stopped contact with him. He does have some serious mental problems and maybe I can't blame him for reacting that way. Just having this dream is bringing back a lot of bad memories.
I know A are able to compassionate, my rec. AB just hasn't been since he quit and it was surprising. I'm sure that will change in time as I know now. I do understand that men show feelings in a different way and I am sure mine will freak out if they ask him to get in touch with his feminine side in rehab. I know if he really works tru it it will benefit both of us.
I'm glad you worked tru it and I'm sure it was very hard. It would be for any man. I know for mine it will be hard because he will think they are trying to force him to do something he does not want to do. He will put up a wall.
I can definetely see that the dream can be a reaction of my current fears, confusions, rejection, and pain. All of these are very much in my life.
I would definetly love to hear more about this if you want to send me a PM.
I'm so glad I posted this, at first I wrote about the dream on paper (i frequently write down my thoughts), then I debated whether I should post about it or not. I am glad I did. It really helped.
thank you for your reply. It really makes a big difference to be able to talk to people who understand and hear the different views about things. It is great to be here.
