The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I have this spiritual calendar and one of my pages was:
"Why has the flower wilted? I pressed it to my heart with anxiety and love; this is why the flower has wilted." Source Rabindranath Tagore
Thank goodness for this program and the gift of acceptance for me in so many aspects of my life. This calendar page struck me so because it's true, when we hold onto to flowers, they wilt. It simply is what it is.
When I have held onto someone with love and anxiety, they too wilt. The motives were pure but it does not matter. Because I clung and sometimes can with any situation that I feel fearful of. The harder and longer I cling for fear of losing something (or the beauty of a flower) the quicker they wilt.
How often have I heard that if love could cure alcoholism, alcoholism would be cured.
Pretty profound for me and I thought I'd share with all of you.
love in recovery, Maria
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If I am not for me, who will be? If I am only for myself, then who am I? If not now, when?
Just exactly what I needed to hear in this moment, Maria- thank you for your post. It is so hard not to cling. It is so hard to not want to be "in the mix" 24/7. This may be one of THE most difficult things for me about being in a relationship. I sometimes wonder if its even possible for me not to cling! I just need to practice one day at a time but wanted to thank you for these wise words, ones I really needed to hear and ponder right now (as I am feeling so clingy!!!HA!) Hugs, J.
Jerry just wrote me, and I am sure he will not mind me repeating this;
- acceptance as in, "Acceptance is the solution to all of my problems." -
Sure am going to work on acceptance, in the present moment. Acceptance needs nurturing and handling with care and adapting in order not to crush the sweet flower that you write about.
Thank you again. Suzannah
-- Edited by Suzannah at 04:15, 2008-07-12
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Out of the ruin of my past I have found the fortress of myself and I know how to defend it.
Strive for WISDOM; Seek SERENITY; NEVER compromise your INTEGRITY.
Thanks for the great post / share. It is so true. I'd love to get a spiritual calendar like you have...........can I ask where you got it from ? You are so right about holding something too close and having it "wilt". I really appreciated your post. Thank you
Oh I certainly felt people pleasing and love bombing would cure all. I certainly felt that if I did more for someone over performed they would appeciate it.
They didn't.
Well they may have but not in the way I so so so craved.
I find acceptance very hard I can go into idealism in a second. I have to keep working on being practical.