The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I use to think being a survivor was a good thing but Suzannah's post on "IF" reminded me there is lots more I learned earlier that I can do rather than just survive. I needed to review this info and will share it with you all tonight too. It renews my hope that I can do more than survive, I can thrive - I can't even imagine that now but I want to believe I will someday. hugs, ddub
I was not to blame for how things were in my life, but now I was responsible. My priorities had indeed become skewed; as things had become so dysfunctional, being a survivor was so key that I lost all sense of anything else. Now, I know that people that go through life just surviving are miserable and they hate their lives. They expect other people to fulfill their souls because they can't or won't do it for themselves. I can't do that anymore. My joy in life is living. Not in surviving. My priority in life? To live, in recovery, ODAT.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I've heard it said before that first I was a victim, then I became a survivor then I became a thriver.
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"Choices are the hinges of destiny." Pythagoras You can't change the past, but you can change the future.
I am really coming to see that in me (I have to stick with just me). I really stand on me head to get other people to try to help me out of survival then when they don't I resent the hell out of them. I also of course zero in on the wrong people to help me. I settle for a few crumbs rather than the nourishment I need.
I know that I have read other posts that have suggested that going from victim to survivor is one step then there is thriving. I think its important for me to know that I am where I am, being just on survival. In time I will get to thrive. Right now I have barely the energy to survive some days and I have to keep turning tons of stuff over.
I think its fine to have the intent but for me personally I have to be careful not to let intent be a stick to beat myself up with. I managed to survive the A I was with (I nearly didn't) now I have to make serious effort to move on. I do that one day at a time, one task at a time.
hugs, ddub