The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I hate when someone says or does something that brings my inner child in all her glory out. She feels deflated, frozen in the thought that she will forever be a screw up. This makes her sad because all she wants is to be recognized for the good that is in her instead of the bad all the time. She is also angry because she feels like she is damned if she does and damned if she doesn't and that makes her not want to try. She craves approval from outside herself as a child does, I guess. She's not a screw up though. She was just never given a chance to be who she is. I guess that's my job. To love and accept her and to tell her that she can be whoever she needs to be. She just needs to keep growing...
Please keep posting and please keep loving your inner child! Prove to yourself it can be done. Show me it can be done also as I struggle for exactly what you describe.
Tell your inner child you and your hp love her and accept her for all she is at this very moment. That she is perfect and beautiful and loved!
I struggle with that myself, usually when my mother is in toxic mode. Hug yourself. Heck, sometimes I drag out the colors and coloring book I have here for the grandkids and indulge that inner child, seriously! ((((hugs))))
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"If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience." - Woodrow Wilson
I hate that too. I just give her a hug and tell her I am not going anywhere and I love her just as she is. To me she is perfect and amazing looking at all she has gone thru. And so am I as she is me.
for me its all about the boundary. I tend to set a lot of them these days so I am not triggered night and day. I also work on looking at what is up for me at any given time, there are generally themes.
This is still a sensitive subject for me, as my inner child is still so fragile. I know exactly how yours feels. Thank you for posting this. I tend to forget when I'm feling really vulnerable to care for her.
In recovery,
__________________
~Jen~
"When you come to the edge of all you know you must believe in one of two things... there will be earth on which to stand or you will be given wings." ~Unknown