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Sorry for the German folks, but I couldn't resist. Yesterday I went to my Oma's (grandma) 90th birthday party. I had a really good time, ate sausage and German Chocolate cake, and listened to some great polka music! lol Okay boys....anda 1 anda 2......
Got to see some relatives I haven't seen in years, and some relatives I had never seen!!!!
I met my Oma's sister for the first time, a charming lady 84 years young. See was very shy around me at first as I had asked her where she lived...and she struggled and became embarrassed because she wasn't quite sure. She had to ask her niece, my aunt...who reminded her the name of the town where the nursing home she lives in is at. I just kept smiling at her and had a bit of an ephipany myself...I was talking to my Great Aunt! And so I told her just that! "Hey! Your are my Great Aunt!" lol Her face just lite up with a big smile and she said "That's right!" She was so sweet.
I got to see and visit some with the guest of honor, and just sit back and watch her. She is an amazing lady. I can only hope to be as animated, funny and sharp minded as she is if I make it to 90 years old!
I got to visit with her a little, there was a long line of folks! lol, and even got to use my Al-anon rescuer skills out when she asked me to find her purse for her...which I did! (It was stuck behind some speakers!) And I got to give her a big hug and tell her that I loved her.
Sitting back and listening to her talk and her mannerisms was like looking in a mirror. I have always known so many of the mannerisms I have came from my father. Yesterday I truly saw that he got them from his momma.
My oma has 22 grandchildren and every one of us were there yesterday. But why is it that when I walked up to her, she looked me in the eye and there was a twinkle in there that said, "Oh there's David, my Favorite"? (I am pretty sure that twinkle is there for everyone though)
One of my aunts had set up a slide show showing old family pictures that she had worked hard scanning into her computer, that just ran the whole time we were there. It was so fantastic to see those pictures of my dad and his family when he was a little. Pictures of my Opa when he was a young father...playing music with his band, pictures of a man I never new, a smiling, happy man, the man he was before alcoholism turned him into the angry, yelling ogre I knew him as. It reinforced for me something you all have taught me, he was a beautiful human being who had a disease that turned him into something I was afraid of as a small child.
I saw a wonderful picture of my family I have never seen before. Mom, Dad brother and I at Oma's house all dressed up in Chistmas finest, my brother and I sitting on the floor with a big Texaco Tanker truck I had gotten as a present! (I had forgotten all about that truck! Boy did I love that truck!!! I wonder what happened to it!)
I looked around the church hall where we were having the party and saw so much love. Each branch of the family sitting at their own tables, chatting with each other..smiling..laughing. Some content to stay in their own group. Others, like me, determined to get out there and try to make contact with them all (I didn't quite pull it off...there were a LOT of people there!!)
I felt the absence of my Uncle Charlie who died last year. The first of my dad's siblings to pass. I saw his wife and his children and his grandchildren there and his pictures on the slide show and knew he was there with us even if not physically.
I looked at my own branch of family...and was amazed to feel the closeness. So much healing has gone on in me these last 4 years since finding this program. I feel so much more comfortable in my own skin.
You all have taught me something that I still can't get over that I never really knew before. It is okay for me to feel love for my family. It is okay for me to smile at them. It is okay to touch them and even give them a hug and a kiss!!! My family was never like that for me before. I learned that I was supposed to hide my feelings and emotions.
But from the beginning, you all have been open, loving and caring with me and I quickly came to be that way with you...and you taught me well. I figured if it works with you why not with my family of birth! It is a slow process with them, and sometimes uncomfortable, but it gets easier every day!
My brother came up to me at one point as says "Are we in a feud with anybody?" I was puzzled and had no clue what he was saying...and asked him what he meant. He explained he had been looking around the room at so many people all from the same family and said now would be a good time if we had any "scores" to settle with another family now would be a great time!
I just smiled and said yep you are right. It does feel great to be a part of such a great group of people.
I know what he meant on many levels, family!
When I left, I drove by the old family homes where my grandparents used to live. The places I visited as a child and felt again the wonder and love of those times.
What a wonderful post! It has made my Sunday morning. You are so fortunate to have an extended family. I never, as an adult, had any grandparents; and NEVER any aunts, uncles, or cousins. My dad died when I was 18. My mom is gone now too. There is just my sis and I and our children. Sis has grandchildren, but I do not. But we do not miss what we never had, so I am ok with it all.
The greatest gift any of us can hope for is to be bright, able-bodied, and alert at your Oma's age. God bless her.
Diva
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"Speak your truth quietly and clearly..." Desiderata
I so enjoyed your post David, it was like going home again, too. I am from a small immediate family but a large extended family. My grandmother was the oldest of 11 children. As a child growing up we used to all get together. All the old ones are gone and us younger generation just don't take the time out from our hectic lives to get together.
When the older generation was still alive, I remember us celebrating one of my great aunts 80th birthday parties. We were all grouped in our varioius 'clans' and wandered around from table to table talking to everyone. So many are gone now. All 11 elders are passed and some of the second generation. I'm in the third generation and some of my counsins and I still correspond with one another.
Your post made me miss my family and forgive them their shortcomings, thanks for your post, I think I'll go sit down and write a letter to some of them.
David, Thanks for such a heartwarming post. You should be a writer (or maybe you are a writer?). Anyway - I felt like I was right there with you. How wonderful that you were not only able to be with all of this extended family, but that you were able to APPRECIATE how special this event was.
Thanks for a wonderful post.
~R3
ps: I LOVE what your brother said! Sounds like something my own brother would say! lol
It's so odd you should post this. It must be "Grandma Day". The strangest thing happened here this morning.
I decided to make pancakes for my son and his friend this morning, an oddity in itself..lol I was thinking to myself how my son always felt special because my MIL (passed away 2 yrs ago) used to make blueberry pancakes for him every time we visited. It was "their thing". Then I remembered that Gram had given me her cast iron pancake griddle. I dug it out, found frozen blueberries and went to work.
I called down to my son and said I made a surprise for him. He came up and saw the stack of blueberry pancakes and gave me a puzzled look. I asked why the look? He said "This is sooooo weird. I was just sitting downstairs trying to remember how old I was the summer I spent two weeks with Gram, and I was thinking about all the fun stuff we did together.....and you are using Gram's griddle and making blueberry pancakes!!!
It kind of freaked us both out. I said There is no doubt she's here to visit..lol Then I got to thinking about it. If energy never dies, and we are all one energy, then we should feel their energy when they are present. I guess we just all happened to be open to it and the same frequency this morning. Awesome!
Grandma's are so special. I'm glad you still have yours to hug David. That's a gift in itself.
Christy
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If we think that miracles are normal, we will expect them. And expecting a miracle is the surest way to get one.
What a delight and what a treasure. How well you write of that time together. I was right there in the room with you.
It took me back to my childhood and the wonderful parties we had at my Granny's and the cousins and aunts and uncles and the gaiety and fun and the games.
Thank you for that. Susannah
-- Edited by Suzannah at 18:52, 2008-03-30
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Out of the ruin of my past I have found the fortress of myself and I know how to defend it.
Strive for WISDOM; Seek SERENITY; NEVER compromise your INTEGRITY.
Must you make me cry before I go to bed? I too have no parents now, and never knew my dad's parents, but they will always be with me. My grandma & grandpa from Mom's side were wonderful. Grandma (or Nanny as we use to call her) would make waffles. When she past we use to walk Granddad down to his favorite dinner and have blueberry pancakes for breakfast. Granddad was a sharp as a tack. Grandma was a pistol. He was Filipino, she was Welsh. Let me tell you, that's a combination you don't mess with. Hmm...... maybe that's where I get it! Thanks for the memories. Love and blessings to you and your families.
Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty
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It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
Sorry for the German folks, but I couldn't resist. Yesterday I went to my Oma's (grandma) 90th birthday party. I had a really good time, ate sausage and German Chocolate cake, and listened to some great polka music! lol Okay boys....anda 1 anda 2...... 
And so I told her just that! "Hey! Your are my Great Aunt!" lol Her face just lite up with a big smile and she said "That's right!" She was so sweet.
