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good news i went to ny to be with my daughter when she had baby #3..left feb 22,came home march 8..it was so good to be up there and be there when my granddaughter was born{her name is jaizlynn raine 7,2ozs 9 inches she is so tiny with a head full of hair..but on with the bad news while i was in ny my was SAH went back to drinking and drugs,i havent said anything to him since i got home,because my daughter and son in law and the kids brought me home cause i got sick when there,{lung infection}and could not fly home they r going back to ny sunday nite,all i want to do is pack my stuff and go with them...this was a huge mistake going back to him,and thinking he changed..why didnt i stay away instead of coming back i was free then..but the home we r in now is in my name only so im going to talk to a lawyer and see what i can do to get him out..im done there is no more chances im done with the drinking,drugs and the abuse from him,when im done with him he is going to wish he never slipped or treated me badly..not going down this road again
First of all, congratulations on the new granddaughter, and what a beautiful name for her!
I'm so sorry you came home to what you did. Every time I look back at my life, those seemingly difficult and painful times were blessings in disguise because it took all of that and more to help me move forward in my recovery.
Thinking good thoughts for you today, and sending gentle hugs on the Kansas winds (((hugs)))
__________________
"If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience." - Woodrow Wilson
wow bev, you sound GOOD, I mean you sound solid and calm. I am sorry you came home to that. It must have been really hard after all the goodness with the new arrival and family time away. Know that my best thoughts are with you regardless of what choices you make. Hugs, J.
((((bev))))) sending you hugs. My HP must be sending me a reminder. Some years ago, I went out of state to be with family on a special occasion. When I returned my AF had slipped after a year's sobriety (and so much hope). A ferocious slip, too. I remember those days/weeks/months. To this day, the hardest time in my life. I'm sorry you're going through this. I envy your resolve....to move on from this situation and be done with it. Thanks for sharing. It's kind of a wake up call to me.
Hang in there. I'm saying a special prayer for you today.
Happiness on one side rage and fear on the other. Your grand-daughter is born and a new life begins while another one sadly ends prematurely by the disease of addiction.
He's down again, sick again, dying again. No need to be afraid of a person in that condition. No need to stand over him and hit him with a bat. He doesn't need the bat because the addiction is doing a total job. Your fear and rage doesn't even come close to the fear and rage he is feeling at the moment. You cannot hate him more than he hates himself. Regardless of how you choose to feel about it, this disease will take him. If he lives or dies it won't be about or because of you and how you feel about it or him. This is one disease that does't care and knows it doesn't have to. This is a phenomena of powerlessness like watching a 600 lb tiger raveging a helpless victim who is inches from safety. Sorry I see things in metaphors, pictures. That helps me understand.
What a terrible thing to be sick and dealing with an active A. I dealt with that so much. Believe me you are not alone with the struggle of making a plan B. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, eventually you will get there. In the meantime lean hard on this board.
