The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today's reading (February 21) in One Day at a Time in Al-Anon saved me this morning.
It saved me from myself - from sending myself into a spiral.
I can't remember exactly the text from it (the book is at home right now), but the jist of it was stop wondering if your A is lying to you. Stop putting yourself through that and damaging yourself by thinking of that.
I was soooooo very tempted to have a long talk with my AH about the previous night's events, but after reading today's passage, I stopped. I just told myself, "No. We're not going there. You can't involve yourself in your AH in that way. You have to let him sink or swim. The talk you wanted to have with him this morning would have just dragged you back under and submersed yourself in HIS problems that HE needs to work on."
And then I was thinking to myself while I was brushing my teeth how it's all part of that control issue I have. There's a part of me that feels like he can't do his own recovery right, so I start to feel like I need to involve myself in it to make sure he recovers correctly (whatever the heck a "correct" recovery is!!! )
Whew. Just so glad I remembered to read that little blue book this morning.
I was also thinking to myself this morning how having an A and a co-dependent live together is just such a powder-keg of an environment. It's like mixing toxic chemicals together - if the environment is right, maybe nothing will happen, but if the environment is wrong, then look out!
Great post and awareness. Loved it. I agree also that the little blue book can save a members spirit, emotions, mind and body...when it is read often. Saved mine and thanks for the reminder I will read before going off to work also.
I do my absolute best to read that book every morning. A lot of the time, the stuff makes sense, but I don't see how it directly applies to me at that time, but this morning... BAM! It was all there in plain english.
Hello: I am new here and thankfull to find you. I also attempted to have a talk with my AH. As well, I realize that I must hold on to my program and that's why I'm here. I find it to be more that challenging to keep things going financially, and all levels and to have to relate to the A with the very abstract thinking is unbearable.
I have learned through it all (22 years) that my Higher Power has my back, if I "let go and let God" do what he has done all this time....sustain us all!
Now, I'm facing up to having High Blood Pressure and it seems that the A keeps going like that everready bunnie!!! Your post helped me on my first time with you all.
)