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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> he's being nice so I am suspicious
Post Info TOPIC: he's being nice so I am suspicious
RainyJamie


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he's being nice so I am suspicious
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My AH is laying low and doing lotsa dishes and stuff. Asks me alot about whether he can get me anything or do anything for me. Is it my imagination or is he behaving guilty? Plus, I have not seen him drink...for two days. I thought I smelled some last night but I could have been mistaken.
I am so suspicious because I cannot believe the stuff that he has done and managed to hide from me. I don't know, maybe I should just let it go, but in the past "turning a blind eye" has really come back to bite me in the butt.

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Christy


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Hi RJ,

My best ESH is to enjoy the good days. :)

Christy

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debilyn


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I guess I am more concerned hon,as to what is still making you take his inventory.

What difference does it make? He is an A. He is either going to be using or not in his lifetime. If we police their disease, that is one reason it makes us so sick.there are so many things we can be looking at and thinking about besides something we can control anyway.

For me, I got to where I was only happy becuz he was having some "good time" and was not miserable.

Analyzing the disease is moot. the three c's come to mind. He is doing dishes??? geez then make some lasagna and he will clean up the mess,cool.

hugs, debilyn



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Tiger2006


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i would suggest having no expectations. This is somehting I 'm not good at, but I think you're right to be suspicious. So he's doing the dishes; wonderful! so he's being nice; wonderful! enjoy it why it lasts. When the bomb drops, you'll know the truth. He's being guilty and you'll find out why. but until then, enjoy. It's only a matter of time now.

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Jerry F


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Aloha RJ!!

Best let it go than living life suspiciously.  Have a bag full of "Thank You's" to give back and/or "Can I help you with that's?"  Share in it don't be a spectator.

(((((hugs)))))smile



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cookie1971


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(((((RJ)))))

Enjoy the good days. I have found that it just wastes my time worrying about why he does the good things. I have no expectations these days. I show my A appreciation for the nice things he does for me, but having no expectations means I won't be disappointed if he stops doing these things, and behaves like an A. I stay focused on myself and enjoy the good days whenever I can get them. wink

Take care of yourself hon.

Love and Blessings,

Claudia




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