The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I had an epiphany today which came to me through my dreams.
Ive been struggling these past few weeks with a loss Ive been experiencing. I am losing a friend who has meant the world to me. Theyve been like a soulmate for me. They are not dying just going away, moving on shall we say.
Ive been working my program as hard as I can. Ive been praying. Ive been acting as if. Ive been feeling my feelings -- some of those feelings have not been very nice either I might add. Ive been talking to my program friends to help me process this loss. Ive even done quite a bit of grieving and shedding a few tears too.
Well as most of you may know, the steps of processing grief are: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. I think I am actually getting there.
I rarely dream and I think its because I used to have horrible nightmares as a child and I spent a good amount of time praying that God would release me from nightmares. Every once in a while when I do dream, as soon as I awaken I recall it quickly and then, poof, its gone and I cant remember it.
Today, I remembered my dream, the epiphany. My friend was vividly in my dream and they were telling me that they didnt love me any more. They were with other people. Further evidence that my friendship had been replaced.
That was release, the permission if you will, in order to let the final piece of my grieving go. Ive been praying to God, my HP, with all my might to help me with this situation to see it as it really is, to stop obsessing and let it go.
Todays dream was the epiphany God gave me to help me to the final stage of acceptance.
When you love someone/something, set it free.
This program works if you work, so work it because you (and I) are worth it.
Sharing in love, Maria
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If I am not for me, who will be? If I am only for myself, then who am I? If not now, when?
This speaks to me " When you love someone/something set it free". That is exactly where I am at with my AHsober. So hard to let go but so true. If I really love him I will let him go. Good luck.
The finish to "When you love something let it go..." is, "If it doesn't come back it wasn't meant to be. If it comes back love it forever." Early program lesson on detachment and letting go of my alcoholic wife. Cried alot! Worried alot! Was depressed alot! Was in many meetings and with my sponsor alot! The ending is that she never came back and I'll love her forever.
In your dream?...could the part where they don't love you anymore only be your fearful justification for them leaving? If they love you now how could leaving stop that?
What a great story. It's sad when relationships grow apart. I've come to realize that friendships are not always meant to last a lifetime. Some are. They each serve a purpose and are a gift. You will always have friends here (even if it's me & Pipers). Sometimes you just have to do it. I remember years ago in college, I had to let hubby go. He was with someone else and I never told him how I truly felt. I was coming off an old relationship. Someone after not seeing him for 7 years, he wondered back into my life. You never know what will happen when you let them go. Much love and blessings to you and your family. MERRY CHRISTMAS! WE LOVE YOU!
Live strong, Karilynn & Piper Claus
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It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
& Pipers). Sometimes you just have to do it. I remember years ago in college, I had to let hubby go. He was with someone else and I never told him how I truly felt. I was coming off an old relationship. Someone after not seeing him for 7 years, he wondered back into my life. You never know what will happen when you let them go. Much love and blessings to you and your family. MERRY CHRISTMAS! WE LOVE YOU! 
