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Just wanted to ask for prayers on behalf of the wife and 2 daughters of a friend from church who shot and killed himself night before last. He was a struggling alcoholic, sober sometimes and sometimes not. Apparently his wife heard the gunshot and found him. She is a dear angel of a woman, and one of their daughters was married to a soldier who was killed in Iraq just less than a year ago.
"When you come to the edge of all you know you must believe in one of two things... there will be earth on which to stand or you will be given wings." ~Unknown
I usually post on the AA board. By definition I'm an ALANONER. I don't drink. However, to cope with my own situation I found it more beneficial to throw myself in the midst of those who struggle with the disease by their consumption. I do, however, read the posts here from time to time.
My heart TRULY understands this grief of this family. Dec 6, my AH's nephew hung himself. He was 26, married with a 3 yr. old daughter and a three week old son. Had been in a serious motorcycle accident in May. On med. leave for serveral mos. of therapy to regain full use of leg. He became depressed over finances.....yet found ways to go to the tavern and drink/found ways to drink during this time. He finally was able to go back to work. Still drinking and on the 1st earned a DUI. According to policy, that was immediate dismissal from his job.....a truckdriver. He'd been on antidepressants and it was told he recently quit them abruptly. Life I guess was to unbearable........ He was like a son though I wasn't around him for quite awhile. He and my own two sons still were as close as when they were little. This has not been easy to bear for anyone. My oldest was there when they brought him in to the sheriff's dept. so it can only be imagined how this last memory will effect him for a while. He is a correctional officer. The other son.....rode motorcycles with him. This is the second family member to die where alcohol was involved. The first was in 1981. We had only been married 5 yrs. We got a call Thanksgiving morning around 3. My AH's brother had been found by his wife, in the closed garage car running. The alcohol level in system was considered lethal and the door opener was still in his hand. Certificate....only mentioned carbon monoxide and alcohol levels........ We will never know if he intended his own death. At any rate......according to his daughter was prone to blackouts, had been beating his wife, and most of all drinking daily for as long as she could remember. At the time she was around 12. These revelations came much later. He had complained that summer about being miserable in his marriage yet for the most part seemed upbeat. I was so young and naive in the first experience. Couldn't sleep for mos. afterwards. and when I did there were nightmares. I knew sooooo little about alcoholism though through that period found myself in arguements with AH because he drank heavily to deal with his grief. I now know more...... More than I ever wanted to!!!! Yes, I know what they are going through. Even all the "tools" of AA/ALANON does not prepare one for the pain of deaths such as these. I can only hope....that I may never have to greive another one. My heart to you and this family. Learning aka Wanda
