The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I have been reading this board since May, Iove it. so much insight]gt thank you.
My AH and Ihave been marridw 19yrs in aug, he moved out in May, he got involved with a woman from his work, I really don't think they are involved anymore. He moved up to our cottage that we just got the year before - speak of resentment. I know i know it's bad, working on that yet. anyhow I love al-anon and go every week what a great al-anon I have. My question to you is this- why does he keep me in on the side, things like e-mails several times a day"good morning baby' and I love you, also yesterday out of the blue he shows up with a christmas tree (actaully it is one of the nicest I have seen in years) of course then he grabbed the snow blower (yes I live inone of those areas) we don't have mucch to shovel and I have a couple of strong boys to help me. AH and I over the last few months have talked I tld him I will NOT live with an active alcoholic, so on thangsgiving he invited me to his brothers and I fianlly told him I would go and he did no drink so I invited him to my parents on saturday and he did not drink, beautiful nice day. so what gives, he calls me almost everynight, we have child suppport all set and he didn't argue about that because after our court appearence we went to breakfast. he would love for me to say come home and we will work all thisout, but I just can't so why does he keep contact with me ALL the time... that's my story...
Welcome to the MIP family. I am glad you are attending your meetings. I don't know what's up with hubby. Sometimes it's easier instead of reading into things, just take it for what it is. It was a nice jesture. I've wasted too much time trying to figure out what addicts are thinking, sober or not. Maybe enjoy the fact that he's making nice gestures and leave it at that. You don't have to make any decisions you're not ready for it. Keep coming back to us.
Love and blessings to you and your family.
Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty <-- the cat
__________________
It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
I went back and forth with the A for years. When I left him in March/April this year I was worried sick about him. I kept up contact for a long long time. For me the contact was something I wanted. I had not yet got to the point of saying goodbey. I have to say the goodbye was very very painful.
I stopped calling the A. I stopped engaging with him. There isnt one week I don't think of him and wonder how he is. I know for me personally when I do have contact with him it never goes well. For me it was 2 ways there was so much to settle. The A betrayed and betrayed and lied and lied. He always did that. I got to the point where I no longer wanted to deal with it. I could still be engaged but coming here helped me to disengage.
