The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hello, I am so happy that someone in my homegroup suggested this site to me. I missed my favorite meeting tonight because I had to work late. I have enjoyed reading the posts on here!
Yesterday was a difficult day with my A. What a difference a day makes! We went to his company picnic, he was totally stressed because the big big bosses were going to be there and my husband doesn't deal well with that type of setting. I was as calm and supportive as I could be in the morning, he was cursing at me really saying awful things. He didn't like the way I ironed his shirt, just complaing about nonsense. He got very drunk at the picnic. We got through the day, he ended up apoligizing for his behavior. I was totally hurt and told him so this morning. I woke up with an emotional hangover, but was able to shake it off while I was at work. I am making a true effort to focus on me. I realize that he is very sick. He suffers from depression, he was sober for about 6 yrs, went to meetings, but he didn't do much emotional changing in that time. He was rageful, addicted to phone sex, I am talking phone bills close to a thousand dollars a month. He has been drinking for I think 4 yrs again, I have chosen to stay with him, I am getting better at making time for me, and doing something nice for myself even if it is just a walk in the park or a bubble bath, I am on a strict budget, so I try to stay away from the mall as much as possible, which is also huge progress, we were severly in debt until recently. I was definetly sabbotoging myself, and trying to fill that empty feeling inside with purses, and perfume. I am so glad to be on this board, I can't always get to f to f meetings because of my work schedule, it's nice to know that there is this extra support. Thank you Rita
Welcome, and I am glad you found this board as well. This is a great place for in between meetings, or in your case when you cannot make a meeting. We do offer meetings here in the chatroom, (where you can click on above) 2 x a day, and the rest of the time it is open chat. If you are struggling with something , or you just need to vent you can come and join us in the chatroom as someone is usually there to listen. As for your post it seems you are working your program well, keep up the good work, and remember to keep the focus on you!
Gosh your husband sounds much like me. I've been in Al anon for a few years now. Its been such a long haul to get beyond the resentment pity pot for me. These days I do let go of my resentments pretty quickly. For me I had to be practically homeless to do that.
I really did not want to do the work of the program.
No one here is going to judge you for staying. I do not live with my A boyfriend but I am very involved with him still. There is a huge dependency issue for me in there. I am working on that too.