The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
"The day is just ruined, ReeRee" This is what my granddaughter, Lexi said to me this morning as I was bringing her and her sister, Bella to daycare.
She is about 4 1/2 yrs old - I asked her how could her day be ruined at 6:30 in the morning. She said "I wanted to wear my sparkly orange outfit with the bling, bling to daycare and I couldn't and so now my day is ruined"
I tried not to laugh at her - because to her the day was in pretty bad shape and she is a very sensative little girl.
As I thought about it - I wondered how often have I let one little thing ruin my entire day. Prior to recovery, many, many times.
I hate that at her age she is already exhibiting those habits - but I see how she has been affected by this disease in her young life.
It was hard, but I tried to explain the concept of starting your day over - that she could have a good day even if she wasn't wearing her favorite sparkly orange outfit with the bling, bling - that it was a good day because it wasn't raining and she had a HashBrown from McDonald's. I told her it was ok to be sad about her outfit, but she didn't have to let it ruin her day.
She told me "ReeRee, you just don't get it. I never get to wear my favorite outfit" I said "Ok, I hate you are having a bad morning"
And just let it be a reminder to me - Progress not Perfection - maybe I needed the reminder that I don't have to let unfortunate circumstances ruin my whole day. My life has been very chaotic lately. A lot of unplanned, semi-emergencies - mini-stresses and sudden plan changes. But, I don't have to let it ruin my entire life - I'm still making it - One Step at a Time - trusting in This Too Shall Pass. And I don't even HAVE a sparkly orange outfit with bling, bling -
Hope that you have a wonderful afternoon and that you are able to let those things that try to ruin your day just roll on off your back. I also pray that your heart's desire is given to you as long as it is according to your HP's will - maybe it will be a sparkly orange outfit with bling, bling!!
Wishing you Serenity & Joy, Rita aka ReeRee
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No matter what me and my God are going to be ok, even better than OK -
What a good grandma you are "ReeRee" I wish I had a sparkly Orange outfit with bling bling too!! I can remember when I was a kid... I could always tell if it was going to be a good party or a bad party if I got to wear my favorite red dress. If I didn't have my favorite red dress it just didn't feel the same to me.
Thank you for that colorful reminder to not let the little things that go a wry in our day spoil the entire day. I'm sure if I think real hard I can find at least one thing to be happy about in a day. Right now I'm thinkin about that red dress that I loved so much. I sure can understand what your granddaughter was feeling this morning. Hopefully she'll have something good to talk about tonight. Keep taking it One Day At A Time, sounds like you guys need to go shopping this weekend for some sparkly clothes.
Peace, Twinmom~
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"The people who don't mind matter and the people who mind, don't matter". (Dr. Seuss)
This morning I went to let all the chickens and geese and turkeys out of their yard to roam and forage like always. There's a momma chicken with three babies, and I could only see two of them with her . . . the third was drowned in a bucket of water, I didn't think the little guy could get up there . . .
I just burst into tears over the little body in my hands. I thought about the court date today, and became rapidly unable to do anything so I had to go back in the house and have a nice cry for myself before I could do anything else.
For a little child like Lexi, where nearly everything is beyond her direct control, not having the bling bling orange outfit can feel devastating. Today I'm aware I am not in control of the outcome of the hearing. I've done my best to promote my interests and I hope I get what I want. I feel a lot like your granddaughter right now, and feeling out of control makes me superstitious :D , and the poor dead chickie about threw me over the edge.
These things happen, they find all kinds of ways to commit suicide poor dears.
I'm so glad you were there for her, in your strength and health.
Oh, Kim - so sorry about the little baby chick. Good for you to allow yourself that time to cry. Please be especially kind to yourself thru this really emotional time.
Sending you thoughts for a special hug (( ))
Hope tonight you will have a peaceful rest and tomorrow will be a brighter better day. Rita
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No matter what me and my God are going to be ok, even better than OK -
I was thinking to myself that I remember how important the little things are to my feeling safe in my world. Things like my outfits are very important. I totally understand you're granddaughter's feelings. It's not that the day is ruined. It's that the little building blocks that make up the day haven't come together. So that the day hasn't been unifed. I feel where she's at. It makes sense to me.
Now that was a great little story . keep reminding her that she can change her day ,one day she will get it . cudo's to you for your efforts grandma , passing it on works . But it was the orange outfit after all and we don't get it at all . hehe . geeeeze grandma Louise I too am a grandma and I only have boys who could care less what they are wearing onl y interested in Tomas the Train and Cars . Ha!
This made me laugh. Kids are great. Thanks for sharing. (how about an ABC gratitude list...when my daughter was younger she'd get to M and she said "Me" as in herself. I thought that's cool, she grateful for herself Doing these lists always made her feel good.
I knew about doing a Alphabet gratitude list for me - but had never thought about it with those precious grandbabies -
The older ones are getting to be at the age they are learning their ABC's - that would be a great tool for learning the "recovery" way. Plus I'll bet we could make it fun too.
She is doing much better today - she has a Dr appt tomorrow for a check-up and has promises from Mom & ReeRee that she can wear her Sparkly orange outfit with the bling, bling - Lexi's life is Good.
and that always makes ReeRee happy.
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No matter what me and my God are going to be ok, even better than OK -
You know I was going to post today about my over reacting. Your post really pre empts that. I have let my over reacting ruin my life on many many levels.
I chose yesterday not to over react when I felt absolutely stressed to the max.
It was a good choice. I rarely make good choices.
I am glad to make something positive even when I suffused in stress and disarray.
Doing these lists always made her feel good.