The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I think it was in one of the Getting Them Sober books that said moving the furniture has nothing to do with your marriage. We are afraid to move the furniture around thinking that means that the marriage is over. So, I have waited 2 years afraid that if I moved the furniture then my AHsober would definitely file for divorce. It doesn't matter. If he files, he files. I had a friend help me reroute my satellite connection and moved the TV. So now I can watch TV while being warmed by the fire or look out the sliding glass doors at the forest. A change in scenery is good. And a change in perspective.
I have never heard that moving the furniture had anything to do with a marriage, lol. I am proof that moving the furniture will not cause divorce or even seperation.....I move mine several times a year! Although I have to add that rearranging cupboards may cause some irritation with your husband since he will no longer be able to find anything, lol.
I find that moving the furniture when the seasons change makes me feel better, since it changes the view and also helps either to keep the room warmer or allows more of a breeze through the room during the summer months.
Yeah! Now move the end table next to it so you can rest that plate of yummy cookies beside it.
I know exactly what you are talking about. For me it was tucking the sheet corners on his side of the bed. I just knew if I tucked those corners (which he had to have completely loose) then POOF that was it, there'd be no turning back, it would be as good as sealed that the marriage was over. hehehe....I know, it sounds so stupid now. I still remember the day I finally tucked those darn corners all the way around
Keep taking those steps to live your life and keep smiling!
I can relate to what you are saying...although I never thought about it that much. Now that I read your post, I can see that it was a subconscious thing with my husband and me. I always thought that if I changed anything, he'd be in a funk, because he always questioned it.
Luna, about tucking his side of the sheet corners, I can REALLY relate to that one! He has to have his untucked or he untucks them when he's in bed. When they are left untucked, the covers and sheet end up mostly on my side by the morning, and he accuses me of stealing all the covers from him! LOL...
The other day, my daughter moved some small plates (the ones I use for my breakfast EVERY morning) to another cabinet, and they were more difficult to get to, not close to the stove, etc. I asked her why she moved them to that spot and she said because she wanted to. After several mornings of going to the original cabinet to get them and them not being there, I finally moved them back. After all, I'm the one who really uses these plates, not her or my A!
I guess that bit of "change" didn't set well with me!