The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hi everyone. Im new to alanon... i went to my 4th meeting tonight and i was pretty disappointed. i felt as though i really needed a meeting today and i went to the one i could make and the majority of the meeting was taking care of business aspects of the group. i know that this only happens once in a while but today of all days i really felt like i could use a meeting, share and really feel at ease. instead i am frustrated today with the program and ...well...i just dont know what to do now....
Welcome to the program and welcome to MIP! You asked about what to do now...here are some options:
Posting on this board is a great start! Reading other's shares on the has been very useful to me, too.
Do you have any literature at home? It's always great to read on a topic that is currently concerning you. For example, if you have one of the daily readers (Courage to Change, Hope for Today, etc.), you might use the index to read up on fear (since you said you were feeling anxious), or another topic that is of concern to you write now.
If you do not have any literature at home, you can find Al-Anon related literature on the Hazelden (Treatment Center) website--they have a daily reading that can be delivered to your mailbox, which some of us subscribe, too. You can also search their readings by topic.
On MIP you can also visit and participate in the Chat Room--there are meetings and open chats throughout the day.
The speaker tapes are really good. Still only 3 Alanon tapes at the bottom of the page. All the tapes are great in my opinion. http://www.elmoware.com/Archives/spktapes_arch.htm
That's the link but they are also accessed from the main page.
http://www.12stepforums.net/
http://www.12stepforums.net/speakers.html
Note: they are not showing up as links, so copy and paste into your browser. If you don't know how, just ask. (((Hugs))))
Hi there, I'm newish to Alanon too and at my meeting's I'm still finding my feet, as is the nature of my illness I want the answers to my problems there and then, I'm impatinent I think because I've lived with an active alchoholic for 27 years I deserve to get fixed quicker then anyone else, and last night we had a concinece meeting, sometimes I wonder what the heck any of it has to do with getting me better and then out of the blue in my head I just get it. In my group people focuss so much on thier job's and how they have to be a certain way in thier role in thier work place, I'm very fortunate that my A has alway's been functioning and that I haven't had to go out and face the world on my bad day's, I could just hide away. I sometimes think I would have coped better if I had had a career to focuss on and not had the time on my hands to drive my self nut's with thinking about me. After last night, and people sharing about how our home group was run, and how nice it was that within Alanon we are all the same same, we all just get on with it, and alway's even when the chair person unexspectedly can't make it, or someone forgets the milk, it's just not a problem it doesn't wreck the meeting, and in my group we have nurses and tarnsport managers who have such responsibilty and there is no margine for error in their job's and for them to share thier anxiety about this with the likes of me well I just find it so humbling, and I think that in those rooms there is a magic and it carries on into our outside life and it's just fab, I know I can find most all the anwers to my problems in the confines of those rooms.
"East does it", Sometimes the meetings are not exactly what you want to hear.....But every meeting is different.....Chances are your next time at the meeting will be different.....
Also don be scared to ASK, can I share!!!!!!!
I know when your new to al-anon its very scarey to talk,,,,but if you have a desire to talk then do it.......it means your looking for help....
Please don't give up on your meetings.....
I just chaired my first one after 14 months in al-anon....And i feel brilliant lol
Keep comming back, come into our chatroom.......its great too...
Thanks guys....really! These past couple of days have been really rough for me, and i was in the midst of a horribly rough week when i first started going to meetings and i remembered how good that made me feel. i guess i was just expecting to feel better instead of listening to how much money was in the envelope and who wanted to be the new secretary. anyway. that said....maybe i could share here?
.....im starting a new business and its a clothing line. ive been struggling with finding the right patternmakers and sewers and i finally found a really amazing seamstress - but the patterns that were done were so messed up that even though the sewing is great...the finished products are just not how i want them to look. its so frustrating...and expensive! im second guessing my self worth as a designer and as a person who is just hopeless as a designer and how this is just never going to work out for me (all because of some crummy work done by someone who i trusted)....thats the thing. control! i gave up control of my design to a patternmaker who messed everything up. now im struggling with whether or not i should just give up on this. its sucking the life out of me.
also...im in a relationship with someone (and have been seeing him since november)...hes in the program (sober for 4 years)...hes been away on a trip for almost 3 weeks now and even though weve been communicating with him via email im getting really frustrated that he hasnt once told me that he misses me or that hes looking forward to seeing me. its like, if people dont live up to my expectations - i want to dismiss them totally and think that they don't like me or don't care about me.
i really wanted to share that last night at the meeting and i couldnt..so thanks guys for the opportunity to post it here. i appreciate this and am grateful for it. xo jen
Welcome to the MIP family. Here you will find great experience, strength, hope, wisdom and a touch of humor (good for the ). Sorry you had arough time at your f2f. Sounds like you might have hit the monthly business meeting. Don't give up on them. They can be really helpful. You can always come here and join us for our online meetings or chat. Recovery can be overwhelming. But it is the most empowering and freeing thing you will do for yourself. We're always here for you.
Love and blessings to you.
Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty <--- the cat
__________________
It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
). Sorry you had arough time at your f2f. Sounds like you might have hit the monthly business meeting. Don't give up on them. They can be really helpful. You can always come here and join us for our online meetings or chat. Recovery can be overwhelming. But it is the most empowering and freeing thing you will do for yourself. We're always here for you.