The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
my brother was here, now he is gone, i come from a very abusive, dysfunctional family. years ago i moved far away from my family, to try to live a healthier life. last week my brother showed up at my home. he is not comfortable in my house so he stayed at my daughters home. she is only 21, all the easier to function in his dysfunctional way without discomfort. he reeked havoc as only an unmedicated bi polar, abusive, alcoholic can. when he left to visit other relatives , i emailed him and told him i am uncomfortable around him, and to please not come back. i was very polite, tried not to lay blame or guilt. now my husband is gone out of town and i am very nervous, jumpy, irrationally scared. the other day when i drove home, i was counting black pick up trucks. there are so many of them. i was wondering.........., which one was his. when i drove into my yard i tried to drive quietly just in case he was there, and, i needed to get away.
surprisingly, i am not angry with him. just weary, that i have to deal wtih these feelings yet again, and, wondering if Higher Power will ever keep dangerous people away from me. there is only so much i can do, and, leave the rest to GOD, but, i must admit, sometimes that old fear comes back and i wonder if GOD will be able to move fast enough if my brother explodes.
(((((((jewelry))))))) Wow! And I've always wished I had a brother?? I understand moving away from a dysfunctional family. So far, no one has bothered to come see me. If you're brother is dangerous to you, I hope you'll take precautions.
I dealt with a renter once and had to confront him about the drugs I found in his room. Because I didn't know how he would react, I had a friend in the house and a Deputy closely driving around while I confronted him. I'm sorry this happened, stay safe, and set your boundries.
My dysfunctional family stopped visitting when they realized I had no interest in being one of them (dysfunctional). I miss them. I can't say anyone in my family is particularly dangerous, but abusive, unmedicated, mentally ill...sure. I had to confront one and haven't seen them for several years since. They are bipolar and will attempt to telephone me when times are bad only. Then I get caught up in thier troubles. When times are good, they have know time for me. I am not angry with them either. Don't blame you for wanting peace and security. Jamie
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I'm like a pinch of tea...put me in hot water and see how strong I can be.
Sorry for the fear in your words....sounds like a person to avoid...so hard when it is family...but the same rules apply to them! Put your peace of mind and sanity and inner light first...for me, anything that threatens that can be kept at a distance. At least I try. Know our prayers are with you! Love fifi
