Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Skorpi · Skorpi

Some not great news from the vet today. My beautiful Chloe, who tested positive for Heartworm and allergies to her food (homemade allergy diet) last weekend, is also having issues with Kidney function. More tests tomorrow, and I am hoping for the best, but the tapes of losing my Akita Alex (who we jus...

shrnp · shrnp

I keep trying to just be friends with my A ex-bf. It has been sort of alright but he use to be very controlling. All my friends I met through him. I stopped seeing everyone because when we broke up I did not want any reminders of my ex-bf and our relationship. He was very emotionally abusive, probably more t...

Charlotte22 · Charlotte22

Hi Everyone, I want to break my shame around this but i am in my 50s and separated approx 1.5 years ago and having SUCh a hard time separating from my ex who still wants to be with me. He will not go to counselling and had addictive behaviour and i just do NOT want to go back but I feel extremely lonely and all o...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I have been trying something different in regards to my mom. Ironically I would consider her my qualifier even though she doesn't drink or at least like she used to and I totally get it. One thing I have been trying to really do is I do control the amount of time I engage with her and how I choose to engage....

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Some one wrote to me about letting go the first time. Will was not very happy his first day of school but we made it through. The memories the good memories.

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

havnt seen XAH for 1 and 1/ yrs but cant help be reminded of him daily as finances/irs trouble connected to that relationship affects me daily. irs holding on to my disability i just got to approve deferment of irs payment. i just got the ssdi and now i cant pay my bills etc. i dont know wheter to cry/scream...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page shares a member's comment about the hardest thing they had to do in recovery: stop trying to figure out why their qualifier acted in certain ways, or jump to conclusions about their motives. The comment is made that only God knows what goes on in the mind, so don't try to play God or psychiat...

hotrod · hotrod

Ii have recied inquiries regarding thr Morning on line alnon meetings. I have posted to the "chat/meeting room board and have not received a reply. Can someone confirm that the meetings are still being held?

Kellygirl12 · Kellygirl12

Through a lot of work in counseling and alanon, I had come to forgive my alcoholic mother for abandoning me, but I took my forgiveness as I need to try to reach out to her again. I did this recently only to be hurt and disappointed again. She is getting older and her health is deteriorating. I figured I need...

Jerry F · Jerry F

To my MIP Family who I love so deeply. Allow me to detach from you and pay attention with my Higher Power to another issue which is currently weighing so heavily on my heart and spirit. It is an ancient concern for my culture which is presently much more heavy because of the behaviors of foreign leade...

MissM · MissM

I've discussed in the past this problem of not being valued, especially on occasions. Birthdays, Christmas, Mothers days passed and my child, partner etc gave me nothing and I felt angry and resentful as I cooked for them, cleaned after them and planned to spoil them on their next occasion. And I foug...

LinSC · LinSC

To those wonderful Mothers that have loved, nurtured and protected their children in the best way they new how, no regrets.......happy day to you. linsc

Kellygirl12 · Kellygirl12

I have dealt with dealing with constant rejection from both my mother and father over the years. It has leaked out into me choosing unavailable men to have relationships with that never work out. I have been single the past seven years. I get lonely sometimes but it is better than being in a toxic unavai...

hotrod · hotrod

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY The ODA T reading for May 14 speaks about Step One and the word "surrender". The reading suggests that the difference between the act of submission and that of surrender is that in submission we have reached the point where we" appear to accept" reality consciously...

DEF · DEF

I have a physical copy of Blueprint For Progress workbook but am looking for an electronic version to print out sheets to work on. I prefer not to write in this book. Is there such a thing available? Thank you!

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

Dear MIP friends, Thursday was my husband's payday... how I have come to loath paydays! I happen to see him driving and I thought to myself, "Hmmmm, he's home early, what's he doing here?" Then I remembered his bank is in the same shopping center. oh yea, I thought, now he'll go straight to the liquor st...

Kellygirl12 · Kellygirl12

Hello friends, My alcoholic mother left my older brother and I with our workaholic dad when I was 14 to raise. She only moved an hour away but she didn't want any contact with us. My brother started drinking after our mother left and now has liver disease at 40 years of age from his alcohol abuse. I tried fo...

sunmustshine · sunmustshine

I've been doing well in recovery as has AH. He's had a few slips. I've established a boundary of not being able to be in the relationship if he drinks. How do I draw the line? Slips I've read are a part of recovery. I know Alcoholism is unmanageable. It will get worse if the past is an indicator. Is this where...

Dinner · Dinner

hello first time at alanon. My husband has been an AH since 2008. He has barely worked in that time only my income. He has spent so much on alcohol and he has a spending problem in general. I have worked so hard all these years to move up in my job to make more money to support everyone. I have three teenagers...

Ina · Ina

Hello I am extraordinary frustrated and can cry oceans and seas combined. I have a live in B.F. he has 3 kids in late teens that do not reside with us, however, my 2 special needs do. He is a functional alcoholic and gets very hot tempered when he drinks. He doesnt have to even be drunk when he begins his rant...

tealfighter · tealfighter

So when my qualifier and I were close we used to fly remote control airplanes together. I miss it. I also realize some of my insaine behaviour while a part of the group. I would like to fly again. I however feel shunned by some in the group. Of course my mom does not want me to fly again because she doesn't wan...

MissM · MissM

Today's c2c discusses the difficulties many of us face when trying to make decisions. Many of us that have lived in alcoholic chaos dread and avoid making decisions for fear that no matter what we decide, the consequences will be something we must "suffer". We also may perceive that there is a single "...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning all and sorry for the late post of a daily reading! I've had little people spend the night again and it certainly changes up my routine. As I've heard - better late than never! The reading discusses how many of us show up to Al-Anon obsessively focused on our alcoholic. We want the secret...

Lana · Lana

I don't know what to do. My relationship with my adult alcoholic daughter, who lives several thousand miles away is in such bad shape. We talked yesterday because my husband is sick and needs one or possibly two surgeries. I could tell she was drunk and missed work again. This happened after a several d...

LoveNHope · LoveNHope

I've posted on here a couple of times about my issue, and those of you who responded- your thoughts were very helpful to me. My AH, sober for over 1 yr who relapsed 2 mos from us having our first child, is still drinking and has not stopped. I left the house and am staying with my mother in law (his mom). His...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I am working really hard to stay out of the co-dependent stuff relationship wise. If I had a choice in relationships what I want is an interdependent relationship something where we share a common goal rooted together however thrive independently of one another. Without the insecure issues of sel...

WestMan · WestMan

It's 2am and I slept about two hours. I'm so over this BS right now. Yesterday was a bit of a breaking point. I'm ready to throw in the towel on this marriage, my career and myself. I have so little support. I'm actively being undermined by people at work who are supposed to be helping me on a serious project...

Wilady8 · Wilady8

My fiancé of 2 years told me tonight that he is planning on moving out. I have been in recovery (al-anon) for one month and I feel like there is hope for me as a person as well as our relationship since joining Al-anon, going to meetings, and getting a sponsor. But now he says he is planning on moving out of ou...

Mcat54 · Mcat54

I'm happy I got divorced but still mad about the money I had to give my ex. I lived in small places and drove old cars to save for retirement as a single mom and put my daughter through college. He got the house and $100k from my IRA. I get to be divorced. In the long run I know I'll be fine financially, and that...

runi · runi

A relative with family 3 kids, moved in with my us. Idea was to help both families. For the most part it is good. But, a big but. Ive been thinking and praying over this for about 2 months. I go to 2-3 meetings per week, working hard to take care of myself, (self care so foreign for me). Any input ?? Wha...

Aerin · Aerin

In response to a lot of my posts, I often hear that I am putting too much focus on him and not enough on me. very true. And I also hear "the question..what are YOU going to do?" So over the last two years I have had boundaries which took awhile to put in use, but now I do great. He is actively in AA for 7 months but h...

Wilady8 · Wilady8

My fiancé who has been in AA , 11 years sober, has completely stopped approaching me for sex or wanting to have sex. It has been over 2 weeks which may not seem like very long but its the longest we have gone. When I bring it up he says he just doesn't want to. I ask him why and he says he has built a wall up and he do...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Today's reading is about forgiveness and the freedom it brings us. It's also a reminder that forgiveness isn't always finite- we may forgive ourselves or others only to have old resentments come back to us. It is suggested that revisiting and working the steps is a way to fre...

oceanpine · oceanpine

I just got back from my 2-hour hearing, and wanted to share with you all... the judge accepted my parenting plan as is, and stated in court that it was apparent that my AH has a drinking problem and is not doing anything about it, and that she found me to be a credible witness. She commented that many pare...

Funkified · Funkified

How have you all dealt with people at meetings that you found to be disruptive, or disrespectful? I recently missed a number of meetings in a row due to illness. Initially, I had something I could spread, then some of the symptoms died down, but not others, and a doctor visit was in order to be sure I di...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

One thing that has been really difficult for me to do is take the focus off of other people and putting it on me. I can talk about things in my life, what I'm doing, what my schedule is, however when I first came to Alanon I could not tell someone what my favorite color was, what kind of movies I liked, books I...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning all and sorry for the late post of a daily reading! I've had little people spend the night and it certainly changes up my morning routine. I've left my Courage to Change at my meeting so we have One Day at a Time in Al-Anon for today. The reading discusses what stands between us and serenity...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

So I have mouthwash in our bathroom. We were going through it like crazy! All this time, I thought it was my son (you know, being a teen and all). Last Saturday I bought another bottle of mouthwash... except this time it was a brand name, and had ZERO ALCOHOL in bold, large print on the label. Not only that,...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I did a HUGE disservice to my XAH while we were together because I did the emotional work of ALL of his relationships .. this went from me to his family. Apparently I deemed it my duty because I had a uterus that it was my "job". Something I look at today is again we are back to the issue of meddling, fixing a...

Momto3 · Momto3

Hello, Like so many I too, have been reading posts etc hoping to find or more so- let reality set in. Like a concrete slab to what I believe I already know. I'm a 44 yr old divorced mom of 3. Youngest is special needs so I still have to work pt around him. I lived a typical very normal life with my ex of 21 years...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page takes a thought provoking look at the personal story told in AlAnon, as the writer asks: 'Is it our own?' In AlAnon, there is no spokesperson who gives an official narrative that covers all experiences. It is as each, unique member shares their own experience, strength, and hope that ot...

hotrod · hotrod

link:http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t63543370/step-6-alanon-5-10-2017Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on t...

Helpangel · Helpangel

I posted a couple of weeks ago about leaving the house because my ah got mad bc of dog poop, yep dog poop. somewhere, somehow I just had enough. Enough of the bad moods, enough of him being angry at the dogs, work, strangers anything and everything. The whole time I thought it was the alcohol but nope it's...

Sorcha · Sorcha

I need to share, I am at my wit's end and really I know it's probably ridiculous and a big overreaction on my part but I would like to hear other's opinions and suggestions. I finally got to talk to my dry alcoholic partner about the issues that came up between us a couple of weeks ago which I posted about her...

Bettertomorrow · Bettertomorrow

Hello - I would really appreciate anyone who can share ESH regarding an AH stealing money from their spouse. My AH are I separating due to his alcohol issues and he is going to return to his home country in 2 months (basically working a notice period at work and saving up some money to take with him)...

giraffe13 · giraffe13

I have not posted here in awhile. My ex A BF and I have been apart for a little over 1 year. I have been seeing someone new, meeting friends, my life has drastically improved to my old self. Relief there. But, of course we leave them and think they are going to just crumble in their disease and fall on a stree...

shrnp · shrnp

I had not heard from my A ex-bf in a few weeks. Then he calls because he has a lot of stressful things going on. He is not drinking still which is good, and he found a place to live which is even better. Then, after the stressful part of the move was over I did not hear from him for a few days. I figured that is how h...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hi, My face to face group has a few teen who come regularly, and I am wondering if anyone has experience working with an Alateen group, or with teens attending an Alanon Family group. If you do, could you PM me? Thanks!

oceanpine · oceanpine

hi friends - have been lurking lots but not posting. Started a full-time job in Feb, and between that and full-time parenting 2 kids, I have less energy than I ever have. This week, my STBX AH and I go to court for the first time. I am very very grateful that our children are both away on a school trip all wee...

Aerin · Aerin

I posted the other day that I once again declined my ABF hopes that I would move in with him (its been 5yrs but he has only been in AA for 7 months and not completely sober those 7 months) I know I made the right call, but it still sucks. It is hard living in separate homes and financially we would be way better o...

hotrod · hotrod

Good Morning MIP family-- Today is the 10 th Anniversary of my son, Stephen's passing from this dreadful disease. If you think of it, please remember us in your prayers . Thank you. http://hotrod.last-memories.com

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

AlAnon provides many gifts to its members. One of the greatest gifts is freedom from the despair many of us arrived with as we tried to control the uncontrollable, alcohol. Today's page notes that there is a price to be paid to receive them. This price is acceptance of Step 1, where we give up our self-di...

tealfighter · tealfighter

Have any of you ever gone back to a recovering alcoholic after a time apart? How did it work? Did you just fall into the same old habits?

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

How do you stick to your boundaries if your AH won't abide by them? I understand boundaries are for YOU, not the alcoholic. So here is my examples: My AH is angry that I took my teen son and the dog to my mom & dad's house last night. I have told him in the past that I can't handle being in the house when he i...

John Brady · John Brady

I'd like to introduce myself and summarize my story. I'm in my 50's and am married with two daughters. I grew up in a typically dysfunctional alcoholic house with a father who was violent and a mother who was clinically depressed. I loved them both very much and still do.; although, my dad passed two...

VickiR · VickiR

Feeling a lot of worry and sadness tonight. I work in the wedding industry and tomorrow marks the beginning of a busy work season for me for the next few months. AH is out at some bar at the moment and I am feeling such dread for tomorrow. All winter/spring when he doesn't wake up or help on the weekends I jus...

starcatcher2 · starcatcher2

Today has been rough. Missing my ex, but not missing the drama, or the alcohol. I guess IM just missing what could have been. So many obstacles that it never could have been. I just hate the thought of loosing all those "possibilitie", even though I know I gave what I could to a person that didn't think it w...

Summerlady · Summerlady

My son & his wife divorced over a year ago. Ex daughter-in-law remarried last Oct. Son is engaged. Ex daughter in law has been a stink. She bashes our son to the kids & my husband & I as well. And lots of other things too. I have learned a lot this year; we just try to pour into the kids lives, we d...

Lana · Lana

When are online meetings?

Lana · Lana

My adult unmarried 30 year old daughter has relapsed after 3 years of sobriety. She started dating a drinker about a year ago. She told him she was an alccoholic when they met, but she returned to alcohol again because he started excluding her from social events with his drinking friends. She also stop...

	Sub Forum	Topics	Posts	Last Post
	Al-anon speakers - Read Only Al-anon speakers	2	2	October 26th by WebHelper
	Old sticky posts - Read Only Not sure what to do with these so parking them here.	6	91	Mar 10, 2026 by yopame7132

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Hoping for the Best (Preview) Some not great news from the vet today. My beautiful Chloe, who tested positive for Heartworm and allergies to her food (homemade allergy diet) last weekend, is also having issues with Kidney function. More tests tomorrow, and I am hoping for the best, but the tapes of losing my Akita Alex (who we jus...	Skorpi	11	740	May 16, 2017 by PosiesandPuppies
	Overwhelmed (Preview) I keep trying to just be friends with my A ex-bf. It has been sort of alright but he use to be very controlling. All my friends I met through him. I stopped seeing everyone because when we broke up I did not want any reminders of my ex-bf and our relationship. He was very emotionally abusive, probably more t...	shrnp	8	712	May 15, 2017 by LinSC
	Dealing with Deep Loneliness from childhood as an ACOA Adult (Preview) Hi Everyone, I want to break my shame around this but i am in my 50s and separated approx 1.5 years ago and having SUCh a hard time separating from my ex who still wants to be with me. He will not go to counselling and had addictive behaviour and i just do NOT want to go back but I feel extremely lonely and all o...	Charlotte22	5	707	May 15, 2017 by shrnp
	Trying something different .. (Preview) I have been trying something different in regards to my mom. Ironically I would consider her my qualifier even though she doesn't drink or at least like she used to and I totally get it. One thing I have been trying to really do is I do control the amount of time I engage with her and how I choose to engage....	SerenityRUS	2	583	May 15, 2017 by hotrod
	First Time I let my Son go (Preview) Some one wrote to me about letting go the first time. Will was not very happy his first day of school but we made it through. The memories the good memories.	Cathyinaz	12	831	May 15, 2017 by Iamhere
	angry/frustrated (Preview) havnt seen XAH for 1 and 1/ yrs but cant help be reminded of him daily as finances/irs trouble connected to that relationship affects me daily. irs holding on to my disability i just got to approve deferment of irs payment. i just got the ssdi and now i cant pay my bills etc. i dont know wheter to cry/scream...	YARNCRAZY	4	548	May 15, 2017 by Iamhere
	5-15-17 ODAT – Nobody But God Knows...Don’t Try to be God (Preview) Today's page shares a member's comment about the hardest thing they had to do in recovery: stop trying to figure out why their qualifier acted in certain ways, or jump to conclusions about their motives. The comment is made that only God knows what goes on in the mind, so don't try to play God or psychiat...	Enigmatic	4	602	May 15, 2017 by Iamhere
	Morning on line meetings (Preview) Ii have recied inquiries regarding thr Morning on line alnon meetings. I have posted to the "chat/meeting room board and have not received a reply. Can someone confirm that the meetings are still being held?	hotrod	0	485	May 15, 2017 by hotrod
	Forgiving Someone Doesn't Mean Having a Relationship with Them (Preview) Through a lot of work in counseling and alanon, I had come to forgive my alcoholic mother for abandoning me, but I took my forgiveness as I need to try to reach out to her again. I did this recently only to be hurt and disappointed again. She is getting older and her health is deteriorating. I figured I need...	Kellygirl12	6	843	May 15, 2017 by Iamhere
	Detaching and changing lanes. (Preview) To my MIP Family who I love so deeply. Allow me to detach from you and pay attention with my Higher Power to another issue which is currently weighing so heavily on my heart and spirit. It is an ancient concern for my culture which is presently much more heavy because of the behaviors of foreign leade...	Jerry F	21	933	May 15, 2017 by Jazzie18
	Mother's Day 2017 (Preview) I've discussed in the past this problem of not being valued, especially on occasions. Birthdays, Christmas, Mothers days passed and my child, partner etc gave me nothing and I felt angry and resentful as I cooked for them, cleaned after them and planned to spoil them on their next occasion. And I foug...	MissM	7	669	May 14, 2017 by serenity47
	Happy Mothers Day (Preview) To those wonderful Mothers that have loved, nurtured and protected their children in the best way they new how, no regrets.......happy day to you. linsc	LinSC	5	538	May 14, 2017 by Stan1
	Dealing with Constant Rejection (Preview) I have dealt with dealing with constant rejection from both my mother and father over the years. It has leaked out into me choosing unavailable men to have relationships with that never work out. I have been single the past seven years. I get lonely sometimes but it is better than being in a toxic unavai...	Kellygirl12	5	1418	May 14, 2017 by Iamhere
	ODAT READING 5-14-2017 (Preview) HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY The ODA T reading for May 14 speaks about Step One and the word "surrender". The reading suggests that the difference between the act of submission and that of surrender is that in submission we have reached the point where we" appear to accept" reality consciously...	hotrod	4	823	May 14, 2017 by Iamhere
	Blueprint For Progress Electronic (Preview) I have a physical copy of Blueprint For Progress workbook but am looking for an electronic version to print out sheets to work on. I prefer not to write in this book. Is there such a thing available? Thank you!	DEF	7	665	May 14, 2017 by DEF
	New Boundary Set and I Feel Goodhe kdno (Preview) Dear MIP friends, Thursday was my husband's payday... how I have come to loath paydays! I happen to see him driving and I thought to myself, "Hmmmm, he's home early, what's he doing here?" Then I remembered his bank is in the same shopping center. oh yea, I thought, now he'll go straight to the liquor st...	PosiesandPuppies	4	608	May 14, 2017 by PosiesandPuppies
	I've tried for too many years to have relationships with alcoholic family members (Preview) Hello friends, My alcoholic mother left my older brother and I with our workaholic dad when I was 14 to raise. She only moved an hour away but she didn't want any contact with us. My brother started drinking after our mother left and now has liver disease at 40 years of age from his alcohol abuse. I tried fo...	Kellygirl12	5	571	May 13, 2017 by Iamhere
	Alcoholism is sneaky (Preview) I've been doing well in recovery as has AH. He's had a few slips. I've established a boundary of not being able to be in the relationship if he drinks. How do I draw the line? Slips I've read are a part of recovery. I know Alcoholism is unmanageable. It will get worse if the past is an indicator. Is this where...	sunmustshine	4	791	May 13, 2017 by Lyne
	How do I support him but keep our heads above water? (Preview) hello first time at alanon. My husband has been an AH since 2008. He has barely worked in that time only my income. He has spent so much on alcohol and he has a spending problem in general. I have worked so hard all these years to move up in my job to make more money to support everyone. I have three teenagers...	Dinner	8	706	May 13, 2017 by Mattie
	Intimacy and alcohol (Preview) Hello I am extraordinary frustrated and can cry oceans and seas combined. I have a live in B.F. he has 3 kids in late teens that do not reside with us, however, my 2 special needs do. He is a functional alcoholic and gets very hot tempered when he drinks. He doesnt have to even be drunk when he begins his rant...	Ina	1	589	May 13, 2017 by andromeda
	Fixing your mistakes (Preview) So when my qualifier and I were close we used to fly remote control airplanes together. I miss it. I also realize some of my insaine behaviour while a part of the group. I would like to fly again. I however feel shunned by some in the group. Of course my mom does not want me to fly again because she doesn't wan...	tealfighter	3	605	May 13, 2017 by Iamhere
	Courage To Change 13/5 (Preview) Today's c2c discusses the difficulties many of us face when trying to make decisions. Many of us that have lived in alcoholic chaos dread and avoid making decisions for fear that no matter what we decide, the consequences will be something we must "suffer". We also may perceive that there is a single "...	MissM	3	579	May 13, 2017 by Jayla
	One Day at a Time in Al-Anon - 5/12/17 (Preview) Good morning all and sorry for the late post of a daily reading! I've had little people spend the night again and it certainly changes up my routine. As I've heard - better late than never! The reading discusses how many of us show up to Al-Anon obsessively focused on our alcoholic. We want the secret...	Iamhere	5	642	May 12, 2017 by hotrod
	HELP needed!! (Preview) I don't know what to do. My relationship with my adult alcoholic daughter, who lives several thousand miles away is in such bad shape. We talked yesterday because my husband is sick and needs one or possibly two surgeries. I could tell she was drunk and missed work again. This happened after a several d...	Lana	9	734	May 12, 2017 by serenity47
	Conflicted- about to have baby in 8 days. (Preview) I've posted on here a couple of times about my issue, and those of you who responded- your thoughts were very helpful to me. My AH, sober for over 1 yr who relapsed 2 mos from us having our first child, is still drinking and has not stopped. I left the house and am staying with my mother in law (his mom). His...	LoveNHope	5	618	May 12, 2017 by a4l
	Interdependency/ Co-Dependency How to end a relationship (Preview) I am working really hard to stay out of the co-dependent stuff relationship wise. If I had a choice in relationships what I want is an interdependent relationship something where we share a common goal rooted together however thrive independently of one another. Without the insecure issues of sel...	SerenityRUS	5	645	May 12, 2017 by a4l
	So Done with this. (Preview) It's 2am and I slept about two hours. I'm so over this BS right now. Yesterday was a bit of a breaking point. I'm ready to throw in the towel on this marriage, my career and myself. I have so little support. I'm actively being undermined by people at work who are supposed to be helping me on a serious project...	WestMan	4	696	May 12, 2017 by Iamhere
	He says he is planning on moving out ending a relationship moving out break up (Preview) My fiancé of 2 years told me tonight that he is planning on moving out. I have been in recovery (al-anon) for one month and I feel like there is hope for me as a person as well as our relationship since joining Al-anon, going to meetings, and getting a sponsor. But now he says he is planning on moving out of ou...	Wilady8	4	3282	May 12, 2017 by Iamhere
	I paid $1250 for every month I was married (Preview) I'm happy I got divorced but still mad about the money I had to give my ex. I lived in small places and drove old cars to save for retirement as a single mom and put my daughter through college. He got the house and $100k from my IRA. I get to be divorced. In the long run I know I'll be fine financially, and that...	Mcat54	7	836	May 12, 2017 by Iamhere
	do i speak up? (Preview) A relative with family 3 kids, moved in with my us. Idea was to help both families. For the most part it is good. But, a big but. Ive been thinking and praying over this for about 2 months. I go to 2-3 meetings per week, working hard to take care of myself, (self care so foreign for me). Any input ?? Wha...	runi	12	783	May 12, 2017 by Iamhere
	CONSEQUENCES (Preview) In response to a lot of my posts, I often hear that I am putting too much focus on him and not enough on me. very true. And I also hear "the question..what are YOU going to do?" So over the last two years I have had boundaries which took awhile to put in use, but now I do great. He is actively in AA for 7 months but h...	Aerin	8	561	May 12, 2017 by runi
	He stopped wanting to have sex sex running away (Preview) My fiancé who has been in AA , 11 years sober, has completely stopped approaching me for sex or wanting to have sex. It has been over 2 weeks which may not seem like very long but its the longest we have gone. When I bring it up he says he just doesn't want to. I ask him why and he says he has built a wall up and he do...	Wilady8	14	746	May 12, 2017 by Bo
	Hope for Today May 9 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Today's reading is about forgiveness and the freedom it brings us. It's also a reminder that forgiveness isn't always finite- we may forgive ourselves or others only to have old resentments come back to us. It is suggested that revisiting and working the steps is a way to fre...	yanksfan51	4	639	May 11, 2017 by hotrod
	update on court hearing (Preview) I just got back from my 2-hour hearing, and wanted to share with you all... the judge accepted my parenting plan as is, and stated in court that it was apparent that my AH has a drinking problem and is not doing anything about it, and that she found me to be a credible witness. She commented that many pare...	oceanpine	5	598	May 11, 2017 by hotrod
	Dealing With Personalities At Meetings (Preview) How have you all dealt with people at meetings that you found to be disruptive, or disrespectful? I recently missed a number of meetings in a row due to illness. Initially, I had something I could spread, then some of the symptoms died down, but not others, and a doctor visit was in order to be sure I di...	Funkified	12	882	May 11, 2017 by tiredtonite
	Retraining my focus (Preview) One thing that has been really difficult for me to do is take the focus off of other people and putting it on me. I can talk about things in my life, what I'm doing, what my schedule is, however when I first came to Alanon I could not tell someone what my favorite color was, what kind of movies I liked, books I...	SerenityRUS	16	793	May 11, 2017 by Junenine
	ODAT in Al-Anon Daily Reading 5/11/17 (Preview) Good morning all and sorry for the late post of a daily reading! I've had little people spend the night and it certainly changes up my morning routine. I've left my Courage to Change at my meeting so we have One Day at a Time in Al-Anon for today. The reading discusses what stands between us and serenity...	Iamhere	4	1927	May 11, 2017 by Iamhere
	Funny, but not. (Preview) So I have mouthwash in our bathroom. We were going through it like crazy! All this time, I thought it was my son (you know, being a teen and all). Last Saturday I bought another bottle of mouthwash... except this time it was a brand name, and had ZERO ALCOHOL in bold, large print on the label. Not only that,...	PosiesandPuppies	4	602	May 11, 2017 by SerenityRUS
	Doing the Emotional Work .. (Preview) I did a HUGE disservice to my XAH while we were together because I did the emotional work of ALL of his relationships .. this went from me to his family. Apparently I deemed it my duty because I had a uterus that it was my "job". Something I look at today is again we are back to the issue of meddling, fixing a...	SerenityRUS	4	627	May 11, 2017 by Bo
	Intro (Preview) Hello, Like so many I too, have been reading posts etc hoping to find or more so- let reality set in. Like a concrete slab to what I believe I already know. I'm a 44 yr old divorced mom of 3. Youngest is special needs so I still have to work pt around him. I lived a typical very normal life with my ex of 21 years...	Momto3	10	625	May 10, 2017 by Jayla
	5/10/17 Courage to Change – Telling Our Own Story (Preview) Today's page takes a thought provoking look at the personal story told in AlAnon, as the writer asks: 'Is it our own?' In AlAnon, there is no spokesperson who gives an official narrative that covers all experiences. It is as each, unique member shares their own experience, strength, and hope that ot...	Enigmatic	4	1084	May 10, 2017 by Iamhere
	Step 6 posted (Preview) link:http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t63543370/step-6-alanon-5-10-2017Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on t...	hotrod	0	459	May 10, 2017 by hotrod
	It's so...peaceful (Preview) I posted a couple of weeks ago about leaving the house because my ah got mad bc of dog poop, yep dog poop. somewhere, somehow I just had enough. Enough of the bad moods, enough of him being angry at the dogs, work, strangers anything and everything. The whole time I thought it was the alcohol but nope it's...	Helpangel	6	582	May 10, 2017 by Sorcha
	Button pressing (Preview) I need to share, I am at my wit's end and really I know it's probably ridiculous and a big overreaction on my part but I would like to hear other's opinions and suggestions. I finally got to talk to my dry alcoholic partner about the issues that came up between us a couple of weeks ago which I posted about her...	Sorcha	11	681	May 10, 2017 by Sorcha
	ESH please regarding AH stealing money (Preview) Hello - I would really appreciate anyone who can share ESH regarding an AH stealing money from their spouse. My AH are I separating due to his alcohol issues and he is going to return to his home country in 2 months (basically working a notice period at work and saving up some money to take with him)...	Bettertomorrow	23	751	May 10, 2017 by Bettertomorrow
	questioning my sanity (Preview) I have not posted here in awhile. My ex A BF and I have been apart for a little over 1 year. I have been seeing someone new, meeting friends, my life has drastically improved to my old self. Relief there. But, of course we leave them and think they are going to just crumble in their disease and fall on a stree...	giraffe13	10	525	May 10, 2017 by Iamhere
	Same old patterns (Preview) I had not heard from my A ex-bf in a few weeks. Then he calls because he has a lot of stressful things going on. He is not drinking still which is good, and he found a place to live which is even better. Then, after the stressful part of the move was over I did not hear from him for a few days. I figured that is how h...	shrnp	4	596	May 10, 2017 by Iamhere
	Anyone have experience with Alateen? (Preview) Hi, My face to face group has a few teen who come regularly, and I am wondering if anyone has experience working with an Alateen group, or with teens attending an Alanon Family group. If you do, could you PM me? Thanks!	Skorpi	2	568	May 10, 2017 by Skorpi
	court date thurs - would love ESH from anyone who has been through this (Preview) hi friends - have been lurking lots but not posting. Started a full-time job in Feb, and between that and full-time parenting 2 kids, I have less energy than I ever have. This week, my STBX AH and I go to court for the first time. I am very very grateful that our children are both away on a school trip all wee...	oceanpine	14	611	May 9, 2017 by a4l
	I feel bad for him... ugggg (Preview) I posted the other day that I once again declined my ABF hopes that I would move in with him (its been 5yrs but he has only been in AA for 7 months and not completely sober those 7 months) I know I made the right call, but it still sucks. It is hard living in separate homes and financially we would be way better o...	Aerin	7	604	May 9, 2017 by Aerin
	Prayers (Preview) Good Morning MIP family-- Today is the 10 th Anniversary of my son, Stephen's passing from this dreadful disease. If you think of it, please remember us in your prayers . Thank you. http://hotrod.last-memories.com	hotrod	21	601	May 9, 2017 by oceanpine
	5/8/17 ODAT - The Price We Pay... (Preview) AlAnon provides many gifts to its members. One of the greatest gifts is freedom from the despair many of us arrived with as we tried to control the uncontrollable, alcohol. Today's page notes that there is a price to be paid to receive them. This price is acceptance of Step 1, where we give up our self-di...	Enigmatic	7	608	May 9, 2017 by Iamhere
	Going back? (Preview) Have any of you ever gone back to a recovering alcoholic after a time apart? How did it work? Did you just fall into the same old habits?	tealfighter	10	672	May 9, 2017 by Iamhere
	Needing some ESH (Preview) How do you stick to your boundaries if your AH won't abide by them? I understand boundaries are for YOU, not the alcoholic. So here is my examples: My AH is angry that I took my teen son and the dog to my mom & dad's house last night. I have told him in the past that I can't handle being in the house when he i...	PosiesandPuppies	15	776	May 9, 2017 by PosiesandPuppies
	Newbie story (Preview) I'd like to introduce myself and summarize my story. I'm in my 50's and am married with two daughters. I grew up in a typically dysfunctional alcoholic house with a father who was violent and a mother who was clinically depressed. I loved them both very much and still do.; although, my dad passed two...	John Brady	7	908	May 8, 2017 by a4l
	Back to work and my daughter (Preview) Feeling a lot of worry and sadness tonight. I work in the wedding industry and tomorrow marks the beginning of a busy work season for me for the next few months. AH is out at some bar at the moment and I am feeling such dread for tomorrow. All winter/spring when he doesn't wake up or help on the weekends I jus...	VickiR	8	640	May 8, 2017 by VickiR
	Just looking for positive words (Preview) Today has been rough. Missing my ex, but not missing the drama, or the alcohol. I guess IM just missing what could have been. So many obstacles that it never could have been. I just hate the thought of loosing all those "possibilitie", even though I know I gave what I could to a person that didn't think it w...	starcatcher2	16	527	May 8, 2017 by starcatcher2
	ESH for grandchildren whose parents have divorced. (Preview) My son & his wife divorced over a year ago. Ex daughter-in-law remarried last Oct. Son is engaged. Ex daughter in law has been a stink. She bashes our son to the kids & my husband & I as well. And lots of other things too. I have learned a lot this year; we just try to pour into the kids lives, we d...	Summerlady	6	468	May 7, 2017 by Summerlady
	Online meeting (Preview) When are online meetings?	Lana	1	376	May 7, 2017 by KennyFenderjazz
	So lost (Preview) My adult unmarried 30 year old daughter has relapsed after 3 years of sobriety. She started dating a drinker about a year ago. She told him she was an alccoholic when they met, but she returned to alcohol again because he started excluding her from social events with his drinking friends. She also stop...	Lana	24	1712	May 7, 2017 by Lana
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.