Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

In terms of what is "right" or "wrong" for us, what we "should" or "should not" do, or what is/is not "healthy", AlAnon is very clear: we seldom know that for ourselves, and never for others, be they new or experienced. That knowledge belongs to god or higher power alone. These pages provide some helpfu...

hotrod · hotrod

Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together!Step 11 has been posted to the Step Work Board, Here is the link:http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t63751346/alanon-...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I have got to remember that every day is not going to be awful and every day is not going to be awesome .. LOL .. no matter what I can start my day over at my choosing. If I can avoid eating people verbally when they find my last nerve .. priceless .. sigh. Thanks for letting me share :)

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT Reading for today, Sunday 7-16 , speaks about the word"Immaturity". It points out that many of us speak of the alcoholic as being "immature" and childish. but that we too are just as immature and that is why we selected an alcoholic as a partner-- It is like a "child calling to a child". The sug...

courage101 · courage101

JULY 16, 2017 SUNDAY MORNING AL-ANON MEETING IN PROGRESS 10AM EST (7AM PACIFIC) TOPICS: Rejection, Real or Imagined? The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html. There are other ways to join the room also. Using mIRC or other chat client, the ser...

unbroken13 · unbroken13

Good Morning, I know it has been a long time since I have posted here. There has been so much going on it would make anyone's head spin. One good thing has come out of it though, my AH is 24 days sober. Of course this is after he shot a hole in the wall and went to a neighbor and asked her if she wanted to (in his wo...

courage101 · courage101

JULY 15, 2017 SATURDAY EVENING AL-ANON MEETING IN PROGRESS 9PM EST (6PM PACIFIC) TOPICS: Powerless, Surrender to win. The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html. There are other ways to join the room also. Using mIRC or other chat client, the s...

WestMan · WestMan

I haven't seen this come up on here so I hope I'm not breaking the rules. I'll keep it clean. My AW came to bed and wanted to be intimate. Internally I was a bit hesitant but that didn't last long and we went ahead and had sex. I didn't realize until we were well into it that she had almost certainly been drink...

DavidG · DavidG

P. 267. This chapter begins by talking about ambivalence. "In our young lives love and fear were as intimately blended as with scotch and soda." Family life was a rollercoaster ride. Through young innocent eyes this was our normal- this was our world as we knew it. "We learned to deny,minimise, exagg...

Aline · Aline

Hiya, doing some more thinking :D Wanted to share. I realized after a very recent crazy episode that I've been kind of (not sure what to call it) forcing myself into recovery. Like, I've been intellectually getting ahead of myself in the stage of recovery I'm currently at, thinking if I know and unders...

courage101 · courage101

JULY 15, 2017 SATURDAY MORNING AL-ANON MEETING IN PROGRESS 10AM EST (7AM PACIFIC) TOPICS: Powerless, Surrender to win. The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html. There are other ways to join the room also. Using mIRC or other chat client, the...

MissM · MissM

Today's C2C speaks about allowing people to work their program in their own way and time. It suggests that each of us work al-anon in the way that is right for us and some people may take longer to find their way than others, and that is just fine. It suggests that even if we feel frustrated when someone is r...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading talks about the freedom available through working the steps, especially Step 9, where we are asked to make amends. Many of us don't see our part in our lives until we seek recovery and work the steps. The writer discusses not being aware of the burden of guilt until this time in recove...

bzz123 · bzz123

I have been the primary POC for years for my friend's family, friends, etc. where they would come to be for status updates on him, if he was drinking or not, etc. etc. I am done with this. It burdens me so much. Anyway, today his friend texted me to ask me if he was drinking (he is) and if he was working (he's n...

Aline · Aline

Ive been feeling kind of rocky today, like I've been hit on the head with something pretty heavy. I finally got to analyze this, and I've come to this. Short backstory: A couple of days ago my ex-abf sent a message to me that strongly suggested he wants to attempt suicide. I called cops. Well yesterday he...

mamalioness · mamalioness

my beloved cousin is in town..she is like my sister...her mom and dad used to rescue me out of the concentration camp and take me home with them...they wanted to adopt me as I was a lovable child and I fit in well with my "Cuzzie" and her now deceased sister who had Downs Syndrome (she was my play mate...she...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading in Courage to Change talks about choices. Many of us came to Al-Anon broken, sad, mad or other because living with an Alcoholic is beyond difficult. We fret, obsess, worry, project and more - beyond the point of healthy. We wonder how much time have we wasted and what have we missed b...

Hope101 · Hope101

Hi... Im brand new to this...so sorry if I get anything wrong. My partner has relapsed (after 2 and half months) (seems to be the length he can manage each time) and is now on a bender he left 48 hours ago to go feed his friends cats while they are on holiday and hasnt been home since...from a phone call I got l...

muddy · muddy

I would like to invite everyone to our Sunday night Al-Anon meeting. It starts at 7:00 p.m. EST. Please try to make it and bring a friend. I have tried to spruce up the place a bit. Brought in a couple of new couches, got a new coffee pot and a few other amenities. Everyone welcome! Love in Service, Phill...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

Meeting in progress. Please join us! The topics this morning are One Day at a Time, Living in the Now and Open Topic.

Lcle2017 · Lcle2017

My husband did 45 days of treatment and was so optimistic. I was there for the family portion of the program and he had all of these great plans. Then he comes home and each day seemed to take a step back. Met the IOP but didn't enroll. Has only been to one meeting in a week. He has a strong network that he can re...

Mar310 · Mar310

Let's start with the fact that my long-term live-in girlfriend is a warm, caring, driven, type A person. 99% of the time she is wonderful and then we go to a social function and she can't stop drinking once she has started. This typically results in having a great time until she hits a very defined tipp...

jenmom · jenmom

Little background. My brother was an abusive drug/addict alcoholic who attempted to molest me growing up. She called and made up some story that a child had called her phone and she thought it was one of my boys. I told her it was not them and then she started with the I miss you and the boys. And that she lov...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Now that I have had another life learning experience I am very humbled & grateful. I really know it is true that God doesn't give me more than I can handle but I can't handle these times when I feel overwhelmed. My 74 year old mom is still declining. She is not dying but this is killing me. She still want...

Aline · Aline

Went to my x-abfs flat today although he had been drinking. My mistake. I couldn't deal with the situation so I just left pretty soon. He hasn't been eating much, I didn't have money to bring over food. Anyway he kept sending me messeges afterwards and finally wrote something like - bye, this time I'll h...

bzz123 · bzz123

it has been almost three years with my friend including job loss, relationship loss, family alienation, dui, legal troubles, bankruptcy, zero retirement savings anymore, health issues (obv), 15 detoxes, 30 days inpatient, etc. i never had any experience with addiction ever and i thought i was "d...

jenmom · jenmom

I grew up in a home with an alcoholic/drug addict brother. It was an abusive upbringing. My brother was verbally and physically abusive. He attempted, unsuccessfully, to molest me at the age of 9. He would physically abuse me in front of my Mother and as long as she didn't have to deal with it she did noth...

cristina622 · cristina622

My partner has been sober for 17 months now, and works the program very well. We have been together for 6 years, and have recently moved in together with promises made. Now that he is completely focused on himself, he dropped a bombshell and told me he never wants to get married or have kids. I don't know w...

mydogisreallycute · mydogisreallycute

Hi, is it ok for a chairperson to simply change a meeting format and do it "my way" (as it was said) even if there is a group conscious decided format?

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Today's reading is about the gentleness of our program. Specifically the writer mentions that in his/her recovery there was a realization that when acceptance or someone caring for him/her was felt, there was a type of pain associated with the pleasure. There was difficu...

Sorcha · Sorcha

I haven't posted in a while. Things have been very rocky with my alcoholic partner for a long time now, probably always, but there used to be some nice times which have gotten fewer and further between over the last year, whether he is drinking or not. I have been attending al-anon for a long time and real...

mamalioness · mamalioness

Every time I text my daughter or her daughters, i get more bad news about sister dearest NOW her lungs are filling up with fluid so bad, her legs look like balloons...she has asked for hospice care, Wednesday , the doctors will re-eval her and give prognosis...she is going out in such a HAAARD way....Pa...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

So one thing I have been dealing with is the statement that's really none of my business .. I need a good response when I am told that my sig other doesn't like that statement. He believes as we all have that all aspects of our relationship are mine or his business and the reality is no .. it's not. My defin...

shrnp · shrnp

My son is bipolar and off his medication. He does not drink, and I am grateful for that. However, he keeps arguing with me, and he overdrew his checking account. He was arguing with my grandson's mom and I had to talk to her which is very rare. He lives with me and I honestly and thinking about calling the po...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's author lists our identity as something that is damaged as a result of alcoholism. In the process of fighting the effects of the disease with existing, less efficient tools, doubts and misconceptions about our own character can creep in and become part of how we see ourselves. AlAnon helps u...

hopelessONE · hopelessONE

I've been living with a highly functioning alcoholic for over 25 years. Some days are better than others. I've recently starting seeing a wonderful therapist who often encourages me to attend an Al-Anon meeting. With the help of a therapist, I've started communicating with my adult children ab...

VickiR · VickiR

Hi everyone, I haven't posted in a while, things have been tense and strained and I haven't had a lot to say. My AH has been trying I guess, but things felt broken after he was physical with me in may for the first time. I was working everything over in my head and was ready to make a move and call the police if a...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for July 9 speaks about self-pity and how destructive this can be to our minds and hearts. It suggests that we may be envying those who have more material things like a house etc or many could be resentful of others because we are bored an hate the monotony in our lives not having en...

hotrod · hotrod

Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! The 10th Step has been posted to the Step Work Board. Here is the link: http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t63730643...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all... kia ora... I have two 'coming of age' stories... one happened when I was 17. I was doing well at school outwardly- but I was sleepwalking... I was heading for the streets. Being a farm boy I knew how to forage, and never actually went hungry. Mum and dad came home from the pub about 7. Mum chippe...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Okay I've got a wife in the house and can give and receive kisses and truthfully we are just like when she left...normalcy. I love her steadfastness and her calm spirit...Mahalo Akua...Thank you God. Going to step up my Family Group attendance because I am aware of a return of an old defect which do...

MissM · MissM

Today's C2c reading recalls the way we experience the world as a child...taking in nature with wonder and awe. It suggests that spending time appreciating nature is a wonderful way to help ourselves experience life one day at a time. It points out that creation doesn't waste time worrying or meddlin...

Arda · Arda

I would like to find support from other parents of an alcoholic. For me it feels different when it's your child who is struggling with addiction. No one wants to lose a loved one but a parent especially doesn't want to lose their child.

wonderwoman75 · wonderwoman75

I feel like a desperately need help. My husband gained sobriety at a very young age and had been sober many years when we were married. I never knew him as an alcoholic and we didn't discuss it very much. After about 16 years of sobriety, I caught him drinking when we were on vacation about 9 years ago. ...

MsMedina · MsMedina

My father has been a drinker for most of his life but for the past five years it's been horrifically bad. Everything from washing him up to calling an ambulance due to his breathing everything has been done on his part as an alcoholic .He came to visit us for the weekend and I got a call from my grandma that m...

Iamhere · Iamhere

The daily reading today discusses 'chronic scorekeeping'. The author suggests that with each conflict, there needed to be an at fault person and blame assigning was the norm. The thinking applied included assigning blame, and this caused perpetual defensiveness and anxiety. In recovery, we l...

cristina622 · cristina622

Need help! Sorry if this post appears harsh but I am at a loss, and I don't know where to turn to for help. I just want to cry everyday. My /boyfriend/fiancee (will explain) and I have been together for 6 years. I had just gotten out of my marriage and he was getting out of his. Life with him was AMAZING!!!!, l...

Lyne · Lyne

So a few days ago I felt so defeated. I was excluded from a family gathering, and learned that yet another family member dislikes my A so much, that she never wants to see my A again. For the first time in a very long time, I found myself crying which rarely happens anymore. But when I wrote on the board, I...

Rose52 · Rose52

Hi. Just introducing myself. I'm glad to find an online group and hope to connect with others. The last few years have been full of hardship. Now I am having some health problems and am still raising kids on my own . 2 special needs among the group. I am craving some serenity!!

Pacificgirl · Pacificgirl

I've dated a recovering alcoholic for two years. The relationship started off amazing, I had never felt loved like that before. I knew he was several years in recovery and seemed to be doing well. A few months in his mood swings started. I felt like when we got close he pulled away. I knew going in there...

mamalioness · mamalioness

I like to do "challenge" posts, kinda...FUN, but sorta keeps me focused on what did I do to take care of me today??? I had an old gift certificate from the animal shelter and I almost had forgotten it...well?? i went to the shelter today to visit the doggies and kitties and I met this canine charmer...3 m...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP - Happy Thursday!! Today's reading talks about how many of us came to Al-Anon with the deep feeling and thought that - "It isn't fair!!" Most of us feel we deserve better after all we've been through and just believe we've been dealt a "raw deal". The prayer quoted in the "Just for Today...

Aline · Aline

I want to share my gratitude today. It's been exactly 6 months since my first Alanon meeting today, and I feel like celebrating. I've been looking forward to this "semi anniversary" for a couple of weeks now much like a kid waiting for her birthday, although I didn't really expect any presents :) I'm ju...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

The holidays have always been stressful and it's been a long time since I have been through 3 day weekends and so on with another person. Christmas and T-day were easier because we were newer into the relationship I think. We were on his territory not mine. I'm flexible like that .. lol .. it has to be p...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

I am not sure what to do with these feelings, so I am posting about them in the hopes that I can release them into cyberspace and then move on. I was hit yesterday with AH's hospital bill... or at least the EOB saying the stay was "non-medical," and therefore denied. Over $35,000.00!!! I had a feeling that...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

I have been reading a lot lately. Mostly my codie books, but also the "Rethinking Drinking" series by Linda Burlison. These books speak to me, because I have a science background, and I have always loved science. Show me some facts/research and I can relate much better. Probably why religion has alwa...

mamalioness · mamalioness

hospital will transfer my sister to a skilled care facility because our girls cannot cope with one so sick...her lungs are full of fluid so they are draining them as she cannot breathe....she will not get liver biopsy because she is well aware of the stress to her already frail and failing body....and...

niki48 · niki48

I am not sure what finally brought me here or admit my issues except I know that I cannot accept the person I have become any longer. My husband has not had a drink in 2 years 3 months 4 days yet I relive it daily. I am angry and scared every single day. I wait for the "slip up" always. I can't bring myself to...

WestMan · WestMan

Ok so it's not what the subject sounds like. I'm going on vacation and taking the kids out of town for a few days. My AW did not want to go so it's just us. It feels really weird. I know we'll have fun. I know she'll get some peace and quiet. I also know this could be a bad sign and I think it's why I've had a certain...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page is one of several pages in C2C which sheds light on the many ways detachment is helpful to recovery when put into action. The author describes detachment as 'freedom to own what is mine and to allow others to own what is theirs'. This is helpful in all interactions. Use within the fellowshi...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Advice Giving, AlAnon Principles/Traditions, and Group Unity ( 1 2 ) (Preview) In terms of what is "right" or "wrong" for us, what we "should" or "should not" do, or what is/is not "healthy", AlAnon is very clear: we seldom know that for ourselves, and never for others, be they new or experienced. That knowledge belongs to god or higher power alone. These pages provide some helpfu...	Enigmatic	58	5337	Jul 16, 2017 by hotrod
	Step 11 posted (Preview) Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together!Step 11 has been posted to the Step Work Board, Here is the link:http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t63751346/alanon-...	hotrod	0	577	Jul 16, 2017 by hotrod
	Starting My Day Over .. (Preview) I have got to remember that every day is not going to be awful and every day is not going to be awesome .. LOL .. no matter what I can start my day over at my choosing. If I can avoid eating people verbally when they find my last nerve .. priceless .. sigh. Thanks for letting me share :)	SerenityRUS	7	790	Jul 16, 2017 by Jerry F
	ODAT Reading 7-16-2017 (Preview) The ODAT Reading for today, Sunday 7-16 , speaks about the word"Immaturity". It points out that many of us speak of the alcoholic as being "immature" and childish. but that we too are just as immature and that is why we selected an alcoholic as a partner-- It is like a "child calling to a child". The sug...	hotrod	5	675	Jul 16, 2017 by mamalioness
	SUNDAY MORNING AL-ANON MEETING IN PROGRESS 10AM EST (7AM PACIFIC) TOPICS: Rejection, Real or Imagined? (Preview) JULY 16, 2017 SUNDAY MORNING AL-ANON MEETING IN PROGRESS 10AM EST (7AM PACIFIC) TOPICS: Rejection, Real or Imagined? The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html. There are other ways to join the room also. Using mIRC or other chat client, the ser...	courage101	0	566	Jul 16, 2017 by courage101
	Long Time (Preview) Good Morning, I know it has been a long time since I have posted here. There has been so much going on it would make anyone's head spin. One good thing has come out of it though, my AH is 24 days sober. Of course this is after he shot a hole in the wall and went to a neighbor and asked her if she wanted to (in his wo...	unbroken13	7	820	Jul 15, 2017 by Kmt
	SATURDAY EVENING AL-ANON MEETING IN PROGRESS 9PM EST (6PM PACIFIC) TOPICS: Powerless, Surrender to win. (Preview) JULY 15, 2017 SATURDAY EVENING AL-ANON MEETING IN PROGRESS 9PM EST (6PM PACIFIC) TOPICS: Powerless, Surrender to win. The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html. There are other ways to join the room also. Using mIRC or other chat client, the s...	courage101	0	598	Jul 15, 2017 by courage101
	Not sure what this means (sex) (Preview) I haven't seen this come up on here so I hope I'm not breaking the rules. I'll keep it clean. My AW came to bed and wanted to be intimate. Internally I was a bit hesitant but that didn't last long and we went ahead and had sex. I didn't realize until we were well into it that she had almost certainly been drink...	WestMan	18	916	Jul 15, 2017 by Iamhere
	A reading from "From Survival To Recovery". (Preview) P. 267. This chapter begins by talking about ambivalence. "In our young lives love and fear were as intimately blended as with scotch and soda." Family life was a rollercoaster ride. Through young innocent eyes this was our normal- this was our world as we knew it. "We learned to deny,minimise, exagg...	DavidG	13	1948	Jul 15, 2017 by Iamhere
	Progress not perfection (Preview) Hiya, doing some more thinking :D Wanted to share. I realized after a very recent crazy episode that I've been kind of (not sure what to call it) forcing myself into recovery. Like, I've been intellectually getting ahead of myself in the stage of recovery I'm currently at, thinking if I know and unders...	Aline	8	802	Jul 15, 2017 by mamalioness
	SATURDAY MORNING AL-ANON MEETING IN PROGRESS 10AM EST (7AM PACIFIC) TOPICS: Powerless, Surrender to win. (Preview) JULY 15, 2017 SATURDAY MORNING AL-ANON MEETING IN PROGRESS 10AM EST (7AM PACIFIC) TOPICS: Powerless, Surrender to win. The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html. There are other ways to join the room also. Using mIRC or other chat client, the...	courage101	1	638	Jul 15, 2017 by hotrod
	Courage To Change 15/7 (Preview) Today's C2C speaks about allowing people to work their program in their own way and time. It suggests that each of us work al-anon in the way that is right for us and some people may take longer to find their way than others, and that is just fine. It suggests that even if we feel frustrated when someone is r...	MissM	4	633	Jul 15, 2017 by hotrod
	Courage to Change (C2C) 7/14/17 (Preview) Today's reading talks about the freedom available through working the steps, especially Step 9, where we are asked to make amends. Many of us don't see our part in our lives until we seek recovery and work the steps. The writer discusses not being aware of the burden of guilt until this time in recove...	Iamhere	6	688	Jul 14, 2017 by Iamhere
	was i wrong? (Preview) I have been the primary POC for years for my friend's family, friends, etc. where they would come to be for status updates on him, if he was drinking or not, etc. etc. I am done with this. It burdens me so much. Anyway, today his friend texted me to ask me if he was drinking (he is) and if he was working (he's n...	bzz123	16	846	Jul 14, 2017 by SerenityRUS
	Denial (Preview) Ive been feeling kind of rocky today, like I've been hit on the head with something pretty heavy. I finally got to analyze this, and I've come to this. Short backstory: A couple of days ago my ex-abf sent a message to me that strongly suggested he wants to attempt suicide. I called cops. Well yesterday he...	Aline	7	771	Jul 14, 2017 by Aline
	does this devil disease skip anyone???? (Preview) my beloved cousin is in town..she is like my sister...her mom and dad used to rescue me out of the concentration camp and take me home with them...they wanted to adopt me as I was a lovable child and I fit in well with my "Cuzzie" and her now deceased sister who had Downs Syndrome (she was my play mate...she...	mamalioness	4	733	Jul 13, 2017 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change (C2C) 7/13/17 (Preview) Today's reading in Courage to Change talks about choices. Many of us came to Al-Anon broken, sad, mad or other because living with an Alcoholic is beyond difficult. We fret, obsess, worry, project and more - beyond the point of healthy. We wonder how much time have we wasted and what have we missed b...	Iamhere	9	762	Jul 13, 2017 by Iamhere
	new and Confused... (Preview) Hi... Im brand new to this...so sorry if I get anything wrong. My partner has relapsed (after 2 and half months) (seems to be the length he can manage each time) and is now on a bender he left 48 hours ago to go feed his friends cats while they are on holiday and hasnt been home since...from a phone call I got l...	Hope101	8	766	Jul 13, 2017 by mamalioness
	Sundy Night Meeting (Preview) I would like to invite everyone to our Sunday night Al-Anon meeting. It starts at 7:00 p.m. EST. Please try to make it and bring a friend. I have tried to spruce up the place a bit. Brought in a couple of new couches, got a new coffee pot and a few other amenities. Everyone welcome! Love in Service, Phill...	muddy	3	665	Jul 13, 2017 by Bo
	Thursday Morning Meeting (Preview) Meeting in progress. Please join us! The topics this morning are One Day at a Time, Living in the Now and Open Topic.	tiredtonite	1	521	Jul 13, 2017 by hotrod
	Husband not following aftercare plan (Preview) My husband did 45 days of treatment and was so optimistic. I was there for the family portion of the program and he had all of these great plans. Then he comes home and each day seemed to take a step back. Met the IOP but didn't enroll. Has only been to one meeting in a week. He has a strong network that he can re...	Lcle2017	5	764	Jul 13, 2017 by Iamhere
	Called Police on binge drinking gf or 9 years (Preview) Let's start with the fact that my long-term live-in girlfriend is a warm, caring, driven, type A person. 99% of the time she is wonderful and then we go to a social function and she can't stop drinking once she has started. This typically results in having a great time until she hits a very defined tipp...	Mar310	8	733	Jul 12, 2017 by mamalioness
	Mother I haven't spoken to in 2 and a half years called tonight (Preview) Little background. My brother was an abusive drug/addict alcoholic who attempted to molest me growing up. She called and made up some story that a child had called her phone and she thought it was one of my boys. I told her it was not them and then she started with the I miss you and the boys. And that she lov...	jenmom	6	666	Jul 12, 2017 by mamalioness
	Awareness (Preview) Now that I have had another life learning experience I am very humbled & grateful. I really know it is true that God doesn't give me more than I can handle but I can't handle these times when I feel overwhelmed. My 74 year old mom is still declining. She is not dying but this is killing me. She still want...	Hoot Nanny	4	613	Jul 12, 2017 by Iamhere
	Called police (Preview) Went to my x-abfs flat today although he had been drinking. My mistake. I couldn't deal with the situation so I just left pretty soon. He hasn't been eating much, I didn't have money to bring over food. Anyway he kept sending me messeges afterwards and finally wrote something like - bye, this time I'll h...	Aline	11	730	Jul 12, 2017 by shrnp
	new and struggling (Preview) it has been almost three years with my friend including job loss, relationship loss, family alienation, dui, legal troubles, bankruptcy, zero retirement savings anymore, health issues (obv), 15 detoxes, 30 days inpatient, etc. i never had any experience with addiction ever and i thought i was "d...	bzz123	14	796	Jul 12, 2017 by Bo
	New and feeling kind of lost. (Preview) I grew up in a home with an alcoholic/drug addict brother. It was an abusive upbringing. My brother was verbally and physically abusive. He attempted, unsuccessfully, to molest me at the age of 9. He would physically abuse me in front of my Mother and as long as she didn't have to deal with it she did noth...	jenmom	6	682	Jul 11, 2017 by jenmom
	Second Al Anon Meeting.... (Preview) My partner has been sober for 17 months now, and works the program very well. We have been together for 6 years, and have recently moved in together with promises made. Now that he is completely focused on himself, he dropped a bombshell and told me he never wants to get married or have kids. I don't know w...	cristina622	3	600	Jul 11, 2017 by hotrod
	Meeting Dominance or Group Conscious Principals (Preview) Hi, is it ok for a chairperson to simply change a meeting format and do it "my way" (as it was said) even if there is a group conscious decided format?	mydogisreallycute	13	6495	Jul 11, 2017 by DavidG
	Hope for Today July 11 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Today's reading is about the gentleness of our program. Specifically the writer mentions that in his/her recovery there was a realization that when acceptance or someone caring for him/her was felt, there was a type of pain associated with the pleasure. There was difficu...	yanksfan51	4	600	Jul 11, 2017 by Stan1
	The obsession (Preview) I haven't posted in a while. Things have been very rocky with my alcoholic partner for a long time now, probably always, but there used to be some nice times which have gotten fewer and further between over the last year, whether he is drinking or not. I have been attending al-anon for a long time and real...	Sorcha	22	890	Jul 11, 2017 by Bo
	If I didn't have this program and this board, don't know what I would do!!!! (Preview) Every time I text my daughter or her daughters, i get more bad news about sister dearest NOW her lungs are filling up with fluid so bad, her legs look like balloons...she has asked for hospice care, Wednesday , the doctors will re-eval her and give prognosis...she is going out in such a HAAARD way....Pa...	mamalioness	6	662	Jul 11, 2017 by Iamhere
	Minding my own business .. Need ESH .. (Preview) So one thing I have been dealing with is the statement that's really none of my business .. I need a good response when I am told that my sig other doesn't like that statement. He believes as we all have that all aspects of our relationship are mine or his business and the reality is no .. it's not. My defin...	SerenityRUS	9	759	Jul 11, 2017 by hotrod
	Losing my serenity (Preview) My son is bipolar and off his medication. He does not drink, and I am grateful for that. However, he keeps arguing with me, and he overdrew his checking account. He was arguing with my grandson's mom and I had to talk to her which is very rare. He lives with me and I honestly and thinking about calling the po...	shrnp	28	1052	Jul 11, 2017 by shrnp
	7/10/17 Courage to Change (Preview) Today's author lists our identity as something that is damaged as a result of alcoholism. In the process of fighting the effects of the disease with existing, less efficient tools, doubts and misconceptions about our own character can creep in and become part of how we see ourselves. AlAnon helps u...	Enigmatic	7	604	Jul 10, 2017 by mamalioness
	Do I stay or do I go? (Preview) I've been living with a highly functioning alcoholic for over 25 years. Some days are better than others. I've recently starting seeing a wonderful therapist who often encourages me to attend an Al-Anon meeting. With the help of a therapist, I've started communicating with my adult children ab...	hopelessONE	6	740	Jul 10, 2017 by mamalioness
	It's been a while (Preview) Hi everyone, I haven't posted in a while, things have been tense and strained and I haven't had a lot to say. My AH has been trying I guess, but things felt broken after he was physical with me in may for the first time. I was working everything over in my head and was ready to make a move and call the police if a...	VickiR	11	668	Jul 10, 2017 by milkwood
	ODAT Reading 7-9-2017 (Preview) The ODAT reading for July 9 speaks about self-pity and how destructive this can be to our minds and hearts. It suggests that we may be envying those who have more material things like a house etc or many could be resentful of others because we are bored an hate the monotony in our lives not having en...	hotrod	2	1077	Jul 9, 2017 by mamalioness
	10th Step has been posted to the Step Work Board (Preview) Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! The 10th Step has been posted to the Step Work Board. Here is the link: http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t63730643...	hotrod	1	461	Jul 9, 2017 by mamalioness
	Coming of age in Alanon... (Preview) Hi y'all... kia ora... I have two 'coming of age' stories... one happened when I was 17. I was doing well at school outwardly- but I was sleepwalking... I was heading for the streets. Being a farm boy I knew how to forage, and never actually went hungry. Mum and dad came home from the pub about 7. Mum chippe...	DavidG	4	688	Jul 9, 2017 by Enigmatic
	Back to normal somewhat?? (Preview) Okay I've got a wife in the house and can give and receive kisses and truthfully we are just like when she left...normalcy. I love her steadfastness and her calm spirit...Mahalo Akua...Thank you God. Going to step up my Family Group attendance because I am aware of a return of an old defect which do...	Jerry F	8	621	Jul 9, 2017 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change 8/7 (Preview) Today's C2c reading recalls the way we experience the world as a child...taking in nature with wonder and awe. It suggests that spending time appreciating nature is a wonderful way to help ourselves experience life one day at a time. It points out that creation doesn't waste time worrying or meddlin...	MissM	4	596	Jul 9, 2017 by KT2015
	Parent of an alcoholic (Preview) I would like to find support from other parents of an alcoholic. For me it feels different when it's your child who is struggling with addiction. No one wants to lose a loved one but a parent especially doesn't want to lose their child.	Arda	13	1804	Jul 9, 2017 by Iamhere
	Full Relapse and Affair (Preview) I feel like a desperately need help. My husband gained sobriety at a very young age and had been sober many years when we were married. I never knew him as an alcoholic and we didn't discuss it very much. After about 16 years of sobriety, I caught him drinking when we were on vacation about 9 years ago. ...	wonderwoman75	13	904	Jul 8, 2017 by Iamhere
	How to Cope... (Preview) My father has been a drinker for most of his life but for the past five years it's been horrifically bad. Everything from washing him up to calling an ambulance due to his breathing everything has been done on his part as an alcoholic .He came to visit us for the weekend and I got a call from my grandma that m...	MsMedina	7	647	Jul 8, 2017 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change (C2C) 7/7/17 (Preview) The daily reading today discusses 'chronic scorekeeping'. The author suggests that with each conflict, there needed to be an at fault person and blame assigning was the norm. The thinking applied included assigning blame, and this caused perpetual defensiveness and anxiety. In recovery, we l...	Iamhere	6	624	Jul 8, 2017 by mamalioness
	I can't stop crying, need help please!!!!! (Preview) Need help! Sorry if this post appears harsh but I am at a loss, and I don't know where to turn to for help. I just want to cry everyday. My /boyfriend/fiancee (will explain) and I have been together for 6 years. I had just gotten out of my marriage and he was getting out of his. Life with him was AMAZING!!!!, l...	cristina622	8	732	Jul 8, 2017 by mamalioness
	Making a comeback (Preview) So a few days ago I felt so defeated. I was excluded from a family gathering, and learned that yet another family member dislikes my A so much, that she never wants to see my A again. For the first time in a very long time, I found myself crying which rarely happens anymore. But when I wrote on the board, I...	Lyne	4	628	Jul 7, 2017 by hotrod
	New here (Preview) Hi. Just introducing myself. I'm glad to find an online group and hope to connect with others. The last few years have been full of hardship. Now I am having some health problems and am still raising kids on my own . 2 special needs among the group. I am craving some serenity!!	Rose52	6	641	Jul 7, 2017 by WestMan
	Dating a recovering alcoholic (Preview) I've dated a recovering alcoholic for two years. The relationship started off amazing, I had never felt loved like that before. I knew he was several years in recovery and seemed to be doing well. A few months in his mood swings started. I felt like when we got close he pulled away. I knew going in there...	Pacificgirl	7	2972	Jul 7, 2017 by tiredtonite
	What did I do to take care of me today???? (Preview) I like to do "challenge" posts, kinda...FUN, but sorta keeps me focused on what did I do to take care of me today??? I had an old gift certificate from the animal shelter and I almost had forgotten it...well?? i went to the shelter today to visit the doggies and kitties and I met this canine charmer...3 m...	mamalioness	16	755	Jul 6, 2017 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change (C2C) 7/6/17 (Preview) Good morning MIP - Happy Thursday!! Today's reading talks about how many of us came to Al-Anon with the deep feeling and thought that - "It isn't fair!!" Most of us feel we deserve better after all we've been through and just believe we've been dealt a "raw deal". The prayer quoted in the "Just for Today...	Iamhere	6	723	Jul 6, 2017 by Iamhere
	Grateful (Preview) I want to share my gratitude today. It's been exactly 6 months since my first Alanon meeting today, and I feel like celebrating. I've been looking forward to this "semi anniversary" for a couple of weeks now much like a kid waiting for her birthday, although I didn't really expect any presents :) I'm ju...	Aline	11	696	Jul 6, 2017 by DavidG
	Recovery work is not easy at times .. (Preview) The holidays have always been stressful and it's been a long time since I have been through 3 day weekends and so on with another person. Christmas and T-day were easier because we were newer into the relationship I think. We were on his territory not mine. I'm flexible like that .. lol .. it has to be p...	SerenityRUS	9	700	Jul 6, 2017 by SerenityRUS
	Feeling Resentful (Preview) I am not sure what to do with these feelings, so I am posting about them in the hopes that I can release them into cyberspace and then move on. I was hit yesterday with AH's hospital bill... or at least the EOB saying the stay was "non-medical," and therefore denied. Over $35,000.00!!! I had a feeling that...	PosiesandPuppies	15	805	Jul 6, 2017 by PosiesandPuppies
	Alcoholism as a "brain disease" ( 1 2 ) (Preview) I have been reading a lot lately. Mostly my codie books, but also the "Rethinking Drinking" series by Linda Burlison. These books speak to me, because I have a science background, and I have always loved science. Show me some facts/research and I can relate much better. Probably why religion has alwa...	PosiesandPuppies	53	2817	Jul 6, 2017 by el-cee
	I'm losing her piece by piece (Preview) hospital will transfer my sister to a skilled care facility because our girls cannot cope with one so sick...her lungs are full of fluid so they are draining them as she cannot breathe....she will not get liver biopsy because she is well aware of the stress to her already frail and failing body....and...	mamalioness	19	792	Jul 5, 2017 by mamalioness
	Still Lost Even When He Is Sober (Preview) I am not sure what finally brought me here or admit my issues except I know that I cannot accept the person I have become any longer. My husband has not had a drink in 2 years 3 months 4 days yet I relive it daily. I am angry and scared every single day. I wait for the "slip up" always. I can't bring myself to...	niki48	11	771	Jul 5, 2017 by mamalioness
	Leaving with the kids. (Preview) Ok so it's not what the subject sounds like. I'm going on vacation and taking the kids out of town for a few days. My AW did not want to go so it's just us. It feels really weird. I know we'll have fun. I know she'll get some peace and quiet. I also know this could be a bad sign and I think it's why I've had a certain...	WestMan	24	963	Jul 5, 2017 by shrnp
	7-5-17 C2C Detachment (Preview) Today's page is one of several pages in C2C which sheds light on the many ways detachment is helpful to recovery when put into action. The author describes detachment as 'freedom to own what is mine and to allow others to own what is theirs'. This is helpful in all interactions. Use within the fellowshi...	Enigmatic	6	678	Jul 5, 2017 by mamalioness
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.