Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

jj · jj

I posted the other night about how hubby and I had gone to a friends and it ended up with me not ever wanting to go out like that again. Well I was upset and angry about what had happend and I don't think that I made the situation clear. Hubby had gone a week with out getting drunk and I had had reserv...

Jolert · Jolert

Hello, my name is Jenny. This is my first post to this board, reading other messages here the last few days has helped me. Hopefully sharing this will help others as well as myself. I'd also like to meet some people here who could provide good examples and share support. I live with my husband who is an a...

John · John

http://www.12stepforums.net/mid/musicballs.wmv Click the Link Above and put a smile on your face. John

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

My hubby stepped over the line a few nights ago. He physically harmed my 23 year old son. (Son is okay now but he did have to go to ER and we had to watch him for concussion.) Hubby is out of the house and I have stated he has to go for help if he wants to be here in this relationship and family...

chad79 · chad79

I am a 25 year old male in Iowa. I have never really ever drank myself because of my mom. She had me in high school and then got pregant again 6 years later and got married. Then she had another baby early and he died a few months later of SIDS and that was hard on her, then she got divorced and had a...

nmike · nmike

My husband moved out June 1st to a new town and a new job. We agreed on this date because it was after our last son's high school graduation and I would be on a trip. We didn't talk to each other for a week. He had originally said that he didn't want to talk to me or do anything with me for a year. Now, that is extre...

debilyn · debilyn

Been thinking and praying for you. What a hard thing to deal with. I know you love your family very much and do your best for them. One thing Kis that I have to say, abuse is NOT from being an alcoholic. It is a totally separate problem. Same as if they cheat, totally not from being A. Even if the...

nycbt · nycbt

Since I ave join the Alanon program, I have gain more friends. It is nice to have people I can talk to. A place where I feel safe. A place I know that they will not judge me. What every I tell them they understand because they have been there. Lately I have been opening up in the face to face meeting wh...

holly123 · holly123

I was just reading Chad's post and while responding I realized how much I had learned in the year I have been here about detachment. When I first started I believed detachment meant, put a big wall up between you and don't do anything for them. I completely missed the with love part of the...

nycbt · nycbt

On Saturday I got into a minor accident. I was a little upset but I had faith that everything would work out. I was glad that my hight power was watching over me. On Saturday I was going through a street that had cars park on both sides and very packed. I went through the street very happy that I made it. Cam...

gardengal · gardengal

This disease of alcoholism is a cunning, baffling, inciduous disease. As we become increasingly aware of the family disease, many of us discover that we have performed a particular function in our family or group. Friends and family members play a wide variety of supporting roles in the fami...

megan · megan

I have found an apartment. i filled out the app, left a deposit and am waiting on the credit check i like the apartment. it is on the third floor on the corner with a view of NYC. it will cost me $4000 to move in. I only have $4000 if i do not pay my credit card bill. It is $3000 due to living in the hotel. So I...

nycbt · nycbt

I don't know about any of you but sometimes I get very obessed about things, whether it is eating something I am not supposed to have, or calling someone. It is like something takes over your body and you can't control what is happening. I have lots of obessions that get me into alot of trobule at times. ...

debilyn · debilyn

I was afraid I would get into trouble with my last post. Felt it was negative and not my usual, forgive the A becuz he is sick. Was pleasantly surprised at the great responses!! Thank you! SMOINKS, SMOINKS, SMOINKS!! (smack + oink) So today I calmly took down our marriage license, took d...

holly123 · holly123

I just wanted to thank everyone for their responses to my post "Its working!!!!". I was feeling a little down because friday night yet again he stayed out late at his friends, he was supposed to be home at 6:00 to watch my son but never showed up to releave his family, when I got back from my da...

Phil · Phil

Patience is the ability to: Sit back and wait for an expected outcome without experiencing anxiety, tension, or frustration. Let go of your need for immediate gratification. Display tolerance, compassion, understanding, and acceptance toward those who are slower than you in developing maturi...

wille · wille

Hi all, Howdy! I promise to put a blurb on site re the movie, "What the bleep do we know." It is a movie that explores the reconstruction of one's reality. It is based on physical laws - as one changes their mindset, their reality shifts. Neurons and sysapses regroup that affect real...

mom to 2 · mom to 2

Hello all, I'm in desperate need of insight. Long story short--binge drinking hubby entered a 30 day program in March. Did well there---came out and went on a week binge. Came home humiliated and shamed--started back to AA, calling his rehab friends, etc. Never...

Christy · Christy

My son is home in total misery, but the surgery is done. He said it feels like someone hit him in the face with a baseball bat. He has packing in his sinuses and a lovely gauze bandage under his nose for drainage. It's a good thing he's so wiped out or he'd be throwing a fit, saying he look...

Donna · Donna

I'm sitting here at 1:40 a.m. and of course, my A has not come back from the bar yet (where he's been for the last almost 10 hours--a 'short' outing for him)... It truly burns me that he can't make it home right after the bar closes. Where does he go? Honestly, thoughts race from him walking ho...

Jolert · Jolert

Hello everyone, Last night was so odd I need to share it, perhaps someone will have some comment or something. i needed to get out of the house and asked my A (sober for 2 weeks but not in program) if he was up to going to see a band at a neighborhood theatre with me. They do serve beer there and I would have...

Powerless · Powerless

I have started on my increased dosage of Prozac...hope it helps. the therapist told me to keep taking it and accept teh fact that I am depressed. I explained to her that I felt it was the most useless of emotions. I am just trying to wait it out and wait for things to get better. I...

debilyn · debilyn

I know a lot is becuz of my situation right now. Waiting for the ultra sound the 14th is pretty rough. Limbo is hard on us all. I woke at five am and drove to see A. He was very nice and appropriate. I mean he was empathetic and loving. Says he is clean and sober. Again I say that is not my concern. B...

gardengal · gardengal

Life is a package deal. It is not enough to look at the parts we like. It is necessary to face the whole picture so that we can make realistic choices for ourselves and stop setting ourselves up for the disappointment. Living with A's many of us coped with an ever-shifting situation in which our sense o...

Christy · Christy

My 15 yr old son is having surgery in the morning (7 a.m.) on his sinuses. I understand it's nothing major, but he's my baby and I'd sure feel better with some extra prayers. I just reread the paper the doctor gave me of possible complications, and OMG!..I shouldn't have..lol&nb...

teddybear · teddybear

Hi Everyone, What a surprise I had today!! Yesterday was a really difficult day for me, because I felt so misunderstood. We got up early in the morning, and my husband asked me to take a walk before breakfast. When we came back home, he decided to pull out weeds, so I ate breakfast alone.&...

nikkilou · nikkilou

Hi all, I was wondering what are the best books for a newcomer. I don't have alot of time (three kids) but know I need to start finding anwers. Also I don't go to face to face meetings. I am only onthis website. I have seen then here to oder but MY A dosen't like ordering over the...

debilyn · debilyn

You know, I feel like, if my A wanted help, he would get it. He is choosing to allow the disease to kill him. He is choosing not to be there for me. He chose not to be there for his dieing brother. I for one say I have had it. I hope I cont. to feel this way. I love him, I love how I love him. But it is wasted...

jj · jj

So Hubby and I got invited to a friends house, just supposed to be like a family thing with the kids. So any how I was informed this mornig that no kids were to be there and they were going to have this party rather than just a get together.... So of course going through ever thing that I am right...

lin0606 · lin0606

I went outside for a few minutes last night, just to let the dog out before I went to bed. Sat on the front steps, the streetlight was shining through the trees, and it brought back the memories of a night, ten years or so ago. At this point my husband was drinking heavily, spending most of his evenings...

megan · megan

i can't chair this meeting as the MIRC does not work through the hotel firewall. If someone else can chair please do I am sorry.

teddybear · teddybear

"Forgiving is not forgetting, it's letting go of the hurt." Mary McLeod Bethune I see this quote as very true, because when I have resentment or if I am unable to forgive, the only person that I am hurting is really myself. The person who we resent, does not...

lost · lost

i have filed for divorce. i am living at home, my husband has moved out. when i filed his tune changed---he would do anything--but of course that was limited to one marriage counseling session, only one month of sobriety that would only happen if i let him come home and of course, no long term help...

elizabeth · elizabeth

I Am Finding Me Who is it in this mirror that stands in front of me is that really who I am or someone I just see is she really something of anything I am inside or just another mask put on just another place to hide she's someone I think I love now that I've let her close she's the one I pushed away I've deserted h...

Donna · Donna

Hi, I'm curious. My A has been drinking for 15 years and more (I've been with him for 15). Anyway, I don't know if it's just the addiction or what but I have seen him really lapse in his hygiene habits over the years. It makes me feel like his mother when I point out that he maybe needs to bathe...

whatif · whatif

Megan, I just read your reply to my post. I have been reading here for a while. I have been reading what you have been doing and I am so glad for your truck! Also that you will have an apartment. When I go away for a few days I think a hotel is nice but after about the third night I want my own bed. And to have my jeep...

nycbt · nycbt

Six months ago I had two guy friends. Today I have lots of girlfriends on and off line. I am proud of my self with the progress I have made. I am also happy with the help of my new friends from Alanon that I can talk to an express my life with.

holly123 · holly123

Hi All, I am noticing so much change in myself, I have been trying to control my mouth and keep my mind on myself. My a is still active and still does things that make me want to strangle him but I have managed to maintain this calm, just don't react attitude for 95% of the week....

debilyn · debilyn

Sending love to ya's. I saw a REAL doctor today. My doc is gone for 3 weeks. Her nurse was so nice. the doc came in and she was so nice too! Made me feel right at ease. My blood pressure was not high like it is when I see my doc. My doc is a young man and his nurse is a bit of a crabby old lady... Anyway...

Belongtome · Belongtome

Hi...it's been a long week, but I finally feel like I'm finding a few moments to take care of myself. I've been enjoying my granddaughter, but have called and enrolled her in daycare duing the day, as all the family are busy elsewhere. (Don't they realize what a gift this time is with her vi...

jj · jj

So you all know that the "talk" went very well. Lastnight I fully expected hubby to go out and get bommed as a result of the talk. I was told by a friend that it is very common that the A's do that while trying to digest everything and then and only then would he come to me. Well I also kno...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

"No man is a failure who is enjoying life"---William Feather (Enjoying yourself and life, is one of the best forms of detachment there is!)

wallsal55 · wallsal55

Said to me, wallsal55, in an open meeting 3 weeks ago by an AA member: "The most powerful thing is a Wife in Alanon. If it wasn't for that, I wouldn't be here." "If I wasn't happy anymore, then there was nobody to blame for my unhappiness except myself."

Have a Gr...

whatif · whatif

Yesterday was another binge day for A (husband) this one over 9 hours. I've been posting about this for a while. That binging once a week like clock work ever since a good friend got killed in an auto accident about 2 months ago. I have been trying to stop the screaming and crying when he comes home. I did re...

nycbt · nycbt

I am going to try and not call my husband. It is going to be a very hard thing to do. I love to call him and see how he is doing. I love to hear his voice. It is going to be min to min for me. I am hoping by my help of my higher power. I don't why it is so diffuclt for me to stop calling him. When he goes to his meeting I am...

mastiff · mastiff

FEAR Hey now I gotcha to read my post with that topic didn't I!!!!!!! Just what kinda ladie did you think i was anyway? Know what I think about fear? I think it's a great big coward. Sure some fear has a bit of a big head and shows itself openly, but for the most part, I have found that...

elizabeth · elizabeth

- Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue. - Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them. - Always read stuff that will ma...

Powerless · Powerless

I feel like I am in the middle of a great big ocean and am sinking. I feel a deep depression coming on and am not sure what to do. I just feel so lost. I am looking for all of the wrong things in all of the wrong places. I feel irritable and moody. Doctor upped my Prozac. ...

Donna · Donna

Hi again, I wrote about 3-4 days ago and got wonderful feedback. I have a husband, married for 15 yrs. who is an alcholic, but doesn't drink on a daily basis--likes to spend his time at his uncle's bar for HOURS/DAYS at a time.. Anyway, he's been off work on a workman's comp case for over a year now...

dis5 · dis5

I am a social drinker. I will have a drink once every 3 months. It will only be 2 drinks and thats it. I grew up around an alcoholic and now husband is working on quitting. We both go to f2f meetings. Last night I had 1 drink and I felt guilty about having it. I know I shouldn't feel guilty since I can cont...

Parker · Parker

I'm adopted, and decided long ago never to contact my birth-parents. However, when my biological father sent me a letter, via the adoption agency, an inner struggle started and gave birth to an idea. I asked the agency if we could use them to correspond anonymously, and they agreed. My biological f...

nycbt · nycbt

Thank you to everyone that have answered my post. I have learn alot from everyone. This program by posting has helped me so much. With everyone sharing there experiences with me it has been great. For the new comers keep posting your feeling and you will learn from what the people are saying. It might be...

sanddie · sanddie

I posted the following as a response to another topic and thought I'd start it as a topic because I found this very interesting... I'd like to recommend a book by Neil Anderson, Victory Over The Darkness, A Battle For The Mind.... Basically, we are to take each thought captive as we begin to have the...

nycbt · nycbt

When I meet my husband 5 + yrs ago we used to fight something awful. We would get into physical fights. I would throw things, bite him and we would fight in the car. In the begin of time he was doing drugs and drinking. I wasn't aware he was doing drug until later on when I started to find stuff around the hou...

nycbt · nycbt

My name is Becky I just started Alanon six months ago. My husband and just got married about 10 months ago. We have know each for over 5 yrs going on 6 in aug. I am looking for a person with experience to talk to and help me through the program. If you are interested e-mail me nycbt@yahoo.com. I am looking f...

Phil · Phil

What is accepting personal responsibility? Accepting personal responsibility includes: Acknowledging that you are solely responsible for the choices in your life. Accepting that you are responsible for what you choose to feel or think. Accepting that you choose the direction for your life. Ac...

nycbt · nycbt

I have a problem always calling my husband. He has started to get mad at me an told me that I am stalking him. When we first meet he was living at the house where the women was jelously that he liked me so she didn't want him seeing me. I wanted to see him so bad I would drive by the house in hopes of seeing him. I...

shimo · shimo

MEETING SCHEDULE & GUIDELINES - JUNE 1, 2005 AM Mon - tiredtonite/Shimo Tue - Shimo/wille Wed - kerry5/no alt Thurs - wille/no alt Fri - Mastiff/no alt Sat - Greta/Teddybearpoet...

Lanchas · Lanchas

Can someone explain the differences for Email Visible to Other Members between: Yes, email visible No, and don't accept email No, accept email anonymously please? I would really like to know the difference. Lanchas

DanaAngel · DanaAngel

Hi all, Our home computer has once again crashed (second time this year!) : ( So if anyone was wondering why I am no where to be found, that is the reason. I am posting this from the puter at work which I cannot be on for long periods of time, so that is why I have not...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Isolation (Preview) I posted the other night about how hubby and I had gone to a friends and it ended up with me not ever wanting to go out like that again. Well I was upset and angry about what had happend and I don't think that I made the situation clear. Hubby had gone a week with out getting drunk and I had had reserv...	jj	3	755	Jun 7, 2005 by nmike
	Hello out there!!! (Preview) Hello, my name is Jenny. This is my first post to this board, reading other messages here the last few days has helped me. Hopefully sharing this will help others as well as myself. I'd also like to meet some people here who could provide good examples and share support. I live with my husband who is an a...	Jolert	8	1083	Jun 7, 2005 by Jolert
	Talent Show (Preview) http://www.12stepforums.net/mid/musicballs.wmv Click the Link Above and put a smile on your face. John	John	2	976	Jun 7, 2005 by jj
	HELP (Preview) My hubby stepped over the line a few nights ago. He physically harmed my 23 year old son. (Son is okay now but he did have to go to ER and we had to watch him for concussion.) Hubby is out of the house and I have stated he has to go for help if he wants to be here in this relationship and family...	kismetstrand	13	843	Jun 7, 2005 by bob6502
	New to Board - Need Advice (Preview) I am a 25 year old male in Iowa. I have never really ever drank myself because of my mom. She had me in high school and then got pregant again 6 years later and got married. Then she had another baby early and he died a few months later of SIDS and that was hard on her, then she got divorced and had a...	chad79	9	1144	Jun 7, 2005 by lin0606
	He's gone (Preview) My husband moved out June 1st to a new town and a new job. We agreed on this date because it was after our last son's high school graduation and I would be on a trip. We didn't talk to each other for a week. He had originally said that he didn't want to talk to me or do anything with me for a year. Now, that is extre...	nmike	5	1123	Jun 7, 2005 by abbyal
	kis (Preview) Been thinking and praying for you. What a hard thing to deal with. I know you love your family very much and do your best for them. One thing Kis that I have to say, abuse is NOT from being an alcoholic. It is a totally separate problem. Same as if they cheat, totally not from being A. Even if the...	debilyn	1	920	Jun 7, 2005 by kismetstrand
	FRIENDS/God (Preview) Since I ave join the Alanon program, I have gain more friends. It is nice to have people I can talk to. A place where I feel safe. A place I know that they will not judge me. What every I tell them they understand because they have been there. Lately I have been opening up in the face to face meeting wh...	nycbt	0	739	Jun 7, 2005 by nycbt
	Detachment (Preview) I was just reading Chad's post and while responding I realized how much I had learned in the year I have been here about detachment. When I first started I believed detachment meant, put a big wall up between you and don't do anything for them. I completely missed the with love part of the...	holly123	3	1036	Jun 7, 2005 by nycbt
	SATURDAY (Preview) On Saturday I got into a minor accident. I was a little upset but I had faith that everything would work out. I was glad that my hight power was watching over me. On Saturday I was going through a street that had cars park on both sides and very packed. I went through the street very happy that I made it. Cam...	nycbt	1	849	Jun 7, 2005 by holly123
	Are we blaming ourselves for the A's actions? (Preview) This disease of alcoholism is a cunning, baffling, inciduous disease. As we become increasingly aware of the family disease, many of us discover that we have performed a particular function in our family or group. Friends and family members play a wide variety of supporting roles in the fami...	gardengal	0	859	Jun 7, 2005 by gardengal
	My apartment (Preview) I have found an apartment. i filled out the app, left a deposit and am waiting on the credit check i like the apartment. it is on the third floor on the corner with a view of NYC. it will cost me $4000 to move in. I only have $4000 if i do not pay my credit card bill. It is $3000 due to living in the hotel. So I...	megan	8	1186	Jun 7, 2005 by nycbt
	Obession (Preview) I don't know about any of you but sometimes I get very obessed about things, whether it is eating something I am not supposed to have, or calling someone. It is like something takes over your body and you can't control what is happening. I have lots of obessions that get me into alot of trobule at times. ...	nycbt	7	1004	Jun 7, 2005 by nycbt
	you guys are cool! (Preview) I was afraid I would get into trouble with my last post. Felt it was negative and not my usual, forgive the A becuz he is sick. Was pleasantly surprised at the great responses!! Thank you! SMOINKS, SMOINKS, SMOINKS!! (smack + oink) So today I calmly took down our marriage license, took d...	debilyn	2	711	Jun 6, 2005 by debilyn
	Wow, Thanks (Preview) I just wanted to thank everyone for their responses to my post "Its working!!!!". I was feeling a little down because friday night yet again he stayed out late at his friends, he was supposed to be home at 6:00 to watch my son but never showed up to releave his family, when I got back from my da...	holly123	2	843	Jun 6, 2005 by gardengal
	Patience (Preview) Patience is the ability to: Sit back and wait for an expected outcome without experiencing anxiety, tension, or frustration. Let go of your need for immediate gratification. Display tolerance, compassion, understanding, and acceptance toward those who are slower than you in developing maturi...	Phil	1	1018	Jun 6, 2005 by efd354
	What the bleep (Preview) Hi all, Howdy! I promise to put a blurb on site re the movie, "What the bleep do we know." It is a movie that explores the reconstruction of one's reality. It is based on physical laws - as one changes their mindset, their reality shifts. Neurons and sysapses regroup that affect real...	wille	1	923	Jun 6, 2005 by DanaAngel
	looking for insight during early "recovery" (Preview) Hello all, I'm in desperate need of insight. Long story short--binge drinking hubby entered a 30 day program in March. Did well there---came out and went on a week binge. Came home humiliated and shamed--started back to AA, calling his rehab friends, etc. Never...	mom to 2	7	2414	Jun 6, 2005 by mom to 2
	Surgery update (Preview) My son is home in total misery, but the surgery is done. He said it feels like someone hit him in the face with a baseball bat. He has packing in his sinuses and a lovely gauze bandage under his nose for drainage. It's a good thing he's so wiped out or he'd be throwing a fit, saying he look...	Christy	4	865	Jun 6, 2005 by kerry5
	infuriated again.. (Preview) I'm sitting here at 1:40 a.m. and of course, my A has not come back from the bar yet (where he's been for the last almost 10 hours--a 'short' outing for him)... It truly burns me that he can't make it home right after the bar closes. Where does he go? Honestly, thoughts race from him walking ho...	Donna	9	1039	Jun 6, 2005 by holly123
	Strange night (Preview) Hello everyone, Last night was so odd I need to share it, perhaps someone will have some comment or something. i needed to get out of the house and asked my A (sober for 2 weeks but not in program) if he was up to going to see a band at a neighborhood theatre with me. They do serve beer there and I would have...	Jolert	4	738	Jun 6, 2005 by Jolert
	Life spiraling out of control (Preview) I have started on my increased dosage of Prozac...hope it helps. the therapist told me to keep taking it and accept teh fact that I am depressed. I explained to her that I felt it was the most useless of emotions. I am just trying to wait it out and wait for things to get better. I...	Powerless	3	806	Jun 6, 2005 by Jeannie
	Please help me understand (Preview) I know a lot is becuz of my situation right now. Waiting for the ultra sound the 14th is pretty rough. Limbo is hard on us all. I woke at five am and drove to see A. He was very nice and appropriate. I mean he was empathetic and loving. Says he is clean and sober. Again I say that is not my concern. B...	debilyn	6	756	Jun 6, 2005 by Jeannie
	Are we ready to face reality? (Preview) Life is a package deal. It is not enough to look at the parts we like. It is necessary to face the whole picture so that we can make realistic choices for ourselves and stop setting ourselves up for the disappointment. Living with A's many of us coped with an ever-shifting situation in which our sense o...	gardengal	2	1069	Jun 6, 2005 by Jeannie
	Prayer Request Please (Preview) My 15 yr old son is having surgery in the morning (7 a.m.) on his sinuses. I understand it's nothing major, but he's my baby and I'd sure feel better with some extra prayers. I just reread the paper the doctor gave me of possible complications, and OMG!..I shouldn't have..lol&nb...	Christy	7	741	Jun 6, 2005 by gardengal
	Communication?? (Preview) Hi Everyone, What a surprise I had today!! Yesterday was a really difficult day for me, because I felt so misunderstood. We got up early in the morning, and my husband asked me to take a walk before breakfast. When we came back home, he decided to pull out weeds, so I ate breakfast alone.&...	teddybear	3	911	Jun 6, 2005 by Jeannie
	books (Preview) Hi all, I was wondering what are the best books for a newcomer. I don't have alot of time (three kids) but know I need to start finding anwers. Also I don't go to face to face meetings. I am only onthis website. I have seen then here to oder but MY A dosen't like ordering over the...	nikkilou	4	902	Jun 6, 2005 by Jeannie
	today these are my thoughts (Preview) You know, I feel like, if my A wanted help, he would get it. He is choosing to allow the disease to kill him. He is choosing not to be there for me. He chose not to be there for his dieing brother. I for one say I have had it. I hope I cont. to feel this way. I love him, I love how I love him. But it is wasted...	debilyn	3	892	Jun 6, 2005 by Jeannie
	What Would you do?? (Preview) So Hubby and I got invited to a friends house, just supposed to be like a family thing with the kids. So any how I was informed this mornig that no kids were to be there and they were going to have this party rather than just a get together.... So of course going through ever thing that I am right...	jj	5	1146	Jun 5, 2005 by bcanuck
	Wasted Time (Preview) I went outside for a few minutes last night, just to let the dog out before I went to bed. Sat on the front steps, the streetlight was shining through the trees, and it brought back the memories of a night, ten years or so ago. At this point my husband was drinking heavily, spending most of his evenings...	lin0606	3	1090	Jun 5, 2005 by TLC2
	7pm Sunday meeting (Preview) i can't chair this meeting as the MIRC does not work through the hotel firewall. If someone else can chair please do I am sorry.	megan	0	775	Jun 5, 2005 by megan
	A little quote (Preview) "Forgiving is not forgetting, it's letting go of the hurt." Mary McLeod Bethune I see this quote as very true, because when I have resentment or if I am unable to forgive, the only person that I am hurting is really myself. The person who we resent, does not...	teddybear	2	843	Jun 5, 2005 by Samena
	grief clouds it (Preview) i have filed for divorce. i am living at home, my husband has moved out. when i filed his tune changed---he would do anything--but of course that was limited to one marriage counseling session, only one month of sobriety that would only happen if i let him come home and of course, no long term help...	lost	5	1074	Jun 5, 2005 by Samena
	mirror, mirror on the wall.... (Preview) I Am Finding Me Who is it in this mirror that stands in front of me is that really who I am or someone I just see is she really something of anything I am inside or just another mask put on just another place to hide she's someone I think I love now that I've let her close she's the one I pushed away I've deserted h...	elizabeth	1	919	Jun 5, 2005 by Samena
	A real smell here or ? (Preview) Hi, I'm curious. My A has been drinking for 15 years and more (I've been with him for 15). Anyway, I don't know if it's just the addiction or what but I have seen him really lapse in his hygiene habits over the years. It makes me feel like his mother when I point out that he maybe needs to bathe...	Donna	6	1163	Jun 4, 2005 by whitie
	Megan (Preview) Megan, I just read your reply to my post. I have been reading here for a while. I have been reading what you have been doing and I am so glad for your truck! Also that you will have an apartment. When I go away for a few days I think a hotel is nice but after about the third night I want my own bed. And to have my jeep...	whatif	1	656	Jun 4, 2005 by megan
	my progress with friends (Preview) Six months ago I had two guy friends. Today I have lots of girlfriends on and off line. I am proud of my self with the progress I have made. I am also happy with the help of my new friends from Alanon that I can talk to an express my life with.	nycbt	3	794	Jun 4, 2005 by TLC2
	Its working!!!! (Preview) Hi All, I am noticing so much change in myself, I have been trying to control my mouth and keep my mind on myself. My a is still active and still does things that make me want to strangle him but I have managed to maintain this calm, just don't react attitude for 95% of the week....	holly123	5	794	Jun 4, 2005 by TLC2
	2nd update (Preview) Sending love to ya's. I saw a REAL doctor today. My doc is gone for 3 weeks. Her nurse was so nice. the doc came in and she was so nice too! Made me feel right at ease. My blood pressure was not high like it is when I see my doc. My doc is a young man and his nurse is a bit of a crabby old lady... Anyway...	debilyn	5	1044	Jun 4, 2005 by TLC2
	Just getting by (Preview) Hi...it's been a long week, but I finally feel like I'm finding a few moments to take care of myself. I've been enjoying my granddaughter, but have called and enrolled her in daycare duing the day, as all the family are busy elsewhere. (Don't they realize what a gift this time is with her vi...	Belongtome	1	889	Jun 4, 2005 by TLC2
	I have noticed change already/ update (Preview) So you all know that the "talk" went very well. Lastnight I fully expected hubby to go out and get bommed as a result of the talk. I was told by a friend that it is very common that the A's do that while trying to digest everything and then and only then would he come to me. Well I also kno...	jj	1	988	Jun 4, 2005 by TLC2
	Quote for Today (Preview) "No man is a failure who is enjoying life"---William Feather (Enjoying yourself and life, is one of the best forms of detachment there is!)	wallsal55	0	610	Jun 4, 2005 by wallsal55
	The Most Powerful Thing..... (Preview) Said to me, wallsal55, in an open meeting 3 weeks ago by an AA member: "The most powerful thing is a Wife in Alanon. If it wasn't for that, I wouldn't be here." "If I wasn't happy anymore, then there was nobody to blame for my unhappiness except myself." Have a Gr...	wallsal55	0	626	Jun 4, 2005 by wallsal55
	1st time ever admitting a problem (Preview) Yesterday was another binge day for A (husband) this one over 9 hours. I've been posting about this for a while. That binging once a week like clock work ever since a good friend got killed in an auto accident about 2 months ago. I have been trying to stop the screaming and crying when he comes home. I did re...	whatif	2	1090	Jun 4, 2005 by wallsal55
	THIS WORK DAY (Preview) I am going to try and not call my husband. It is going to be a very hard thing to do. I love to call him and see how he is doing. I love to hear his voice. It is going to be min to min for me. I am hoping by my help of my higher power. I don't why it is so diffuclt for me to stop calling him. When he goes to his meeting I am...	nycbt	4	906	Jun 4, 2005 by txmom
	that 4 letter F word..... (Preview) FEAR Hey now I gotcha to read my post with that topic didn't I!!!!!!! Just what kinda ladie did you think i was anyway? Know what I think about fear? I think it's a great big coward. Sure some fear has a bit of a big head and shows itself openly, but for the most part, I have found that...	mastiff	2	818	Jun 4, 2005 by txmom
	just sharing some ways of dealing with the burdens of life: (Preview) - Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue. - Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them. - Always read stuff that will ma...	elizabeth	1	1019	Jun 4, 2005 by lin0606
	Feel like I am sinking (Preview) I feel like I am in the middle of a great big ocean and am sinking. I feel a deep depression coming on and am not sure what to do. I just feel so lost. I am looking for all of the wrong things in all of the wrong places. I feel irritable and moody. Doctor upped my Prozac. ...	Powerless	5	862	Jun 4, 2005 by Jolert
	preparing for the weekend.... (Preview) Hi again, I wrote about 3-4 days ago and got wonderful feedback. I have a husband, married for 15 yrs. who is an alcholic, but doesn't drink on a daily basis--likes to spend his time at his uncle's bar for HOURS/DAYS at a time.. Anyway, he's been off work on a workman's comp case for over a year now...	Donna	2	1019	Jun 3, 2005 by Donna
	Am I Wrong (Preview) I am a social drinker. I will have a drink once every 3 months. It will only be 2 drinks and thats it. I grew up around an alcoholic and now husband is working on quitting. We both go to f2f meetings. Last night I had 1 drink and I felt guilty about having it. I know I shouldn't feel guilty since I can cont...	dis5	5	1222	Jun 3, 2005 by tiredtonite
	A poem from my alcoholic birth-father in prison (Preview) I'm adopted, and decided long ago never to contact my birth-parents. However, when my biological father sent me a letter, via the adoption agency, an inner struggle started and gave birth to an idea. I asked the agency if we could use them to correspond anonymously, and they agreed. My biological f...	Parker	1	1137	Jun 3, 2005 by dis5
	thank you (Preview) Thank you to everyone that have answered my post. I have learn alot from everyone. This program by posting has helped me so much. With everyone sharing there experiences with me it has been great. For the new comers keep posting your feeling and you will learn from what the people are saying. It might be...	nycbt	1	764	Jun 3, 2005 by lin0606
	Obsessive Thoughts.... (Preview) I posted the following as a response to another topic and thought I'd start it as a topic because I found this very interesting... I'd like to recommend a book by Neil Anderson, Victory Over The Darkness, A Battle For The Mind.... Basically, we are to take each thought captive as we begin to have the...	sanddie	0	873	Jun 3, 2005 by sanddie
	my marriage (Preview) When I meet my husband 5 + yrs ago we used to fight something awful. We would get into physical fights. I would throw things, bite him and we would fight in the car. In the begin of time he was doing drugs and drinking. I wasn't aware he was doing drug until later on when I started to find stuff around the hou...	nycbt	1	972	Jun 3, 2005 by nycbt
	looking to widen my support system (Preview) My name is Becky I just started Alanon six months ago. My husband and just got married about 10 months ago. We have know each for over 5 yrs going on 6 in aug. I am looking for a person with experience to talk to and help me through the program. If you are interested e-mail me nycbt@yahoo.com. I am looking f...	nycbt	1	894	Jun 3, 2005 by De Anna
	Accepting Personal Responsibility (Preview) What is accepting personal responsibility? Accepting personal responsibility includes: Acknowledging that you are solely responsible for the choices in your life. Accepting that you are responsible for what you choose to feel or think. Accepting that you choose the direction for your life. Ac...	Phil	0	3574	Jun 3, 2005 by Phil
	always calling (Preview) I have a problem always calling my husband. He has started to get mad at me an told me that I am stalking him. When we first meet he was living at the house where the women was jelously that he liked me so she didn't want him seeing me. I wanted to see him so bad I would drive by the house in hopes of seeing him. I...	nycbt	10	1040	Jun 3, 2005 by sanddie
	MEETING SCHEDULE (Preview) MEETING SCHEDULE & GUIDELINES - JUNE 1, 2005 AM Mon - tiredtonite/Shimo Tue - Shimo/wille Wed - kerry5/no alt Thurs - wille/no alt Fri - Mastiff/no alt Sat - Greta/Teddybearpoet...	shimo	0	921	Jun 3, 2005 by shimo
	About email (Preview) Can someone explain the differences for Email Visible to Other Members between: Yes, email visible No, and don't accept email No, accept email anonymously please? I would really like to know the difference. Lanchas	Lanchas	1	692	Jun 2, 2005 by Maria123
	Not in chatroom or here right now because.... (Preview) Hi all, Our home computer has once again crashed (second time this year!) : ( So if anyone was wondering why I am no where to be found, that is the reason. I am posting this from the puter at work which I cannot be on for long periods of time, so that is why I have not...	DanaAngel	1	811	Jun 2, 2005 by megan
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.