Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

jj · jj

Sometimes, to protect ourselves, we close ourselves off from a person we're in a relationship with. Our body may be present, but we're not. Shutting don, shutting off, closing ourselves and removing our emotionsl presence from a relationship is a powerful tool. We need to use it carefully and res...

dot · dot

Hi - Step three is posted on the Step board. Please come and share your ES&H. Love in Recovery - Dot

dori · dori

Hey all, It is been a while and I am still worknig my program and worknig my steps with my sponsor.This is my problem though I dont want to go to meetings.There are times I think I do not need them and then there are times I just dont want the hassel of it all.I have been in the program 2 years the a in my life is...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

As long as he will go to the counselor....wow! It took my husband several attempts this time around to make it stick. He had years and years of denial, habits, etc. I believe we are on five months sobriety. One attempt at AA didn't get us here. &nbs...

Jolert · Jolert

Hello everyone, I've been sitting here for an hour repeating the mantra ... oh Lord please help us both to find a way to follow your path ... this morning I decided I can not watch my husband go through the same cycle as every time in the last 12 years. I pulled out the seperation papers I had drawn u...

Powerless · Powerless

I keep trying to remind myself that I hate his addiction and not him. It is his addiction that causes the behavior I am seeing. He tried to draw me into an arguement today, although I responded, I caught myself and let it go. He found someone to buy his pickup truck for $3,000. I...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

Below is an email I received from another MIP member who asked me to share with group. HI~How are U? I am letting you know that I will not be in AlAnon for while~I just found out last night that my best friend had been in serious car accident and her daughter was in with her Mom and wa...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi everyone, Well we went to the counselor again tonight. My husband was not drinking and was in good spirits. The kids and I told him what was on our minds. We told him how much we love him, miss him and how much we do want him home and well. We all decided that we are going to try. I would say one las...

Aspouse · Aspouse

Thank you, some of you, who i met in the chat room earlier. this is the first time i have attempted to get help. i am the spouse of an alcoholic, who feels i am his biggest trigger right now. i am scared. my husband relapsed after 3 and 1/2 years of sobriety. i may have triggered him....pushed him , becau...

holly123 · holly123

Hi everyone, I am feeling very down today. Yesterday was my 10th Anniversary and it went unnoticed by all. My mother in law did ask what she should get us and my mom the same but as far as my husband went, I had to remind him and then it was dropped. I am real...

jpquack · jpquack

hi - i'm new to wilmington, nc and would like to find meetings of al-anon, or aa if that's all that's here - feel very stressed out and could use some good support !!! - thanks - john

nycbt · nycbt

Recently I have put on some weight that is bothering me to death. Alot of people say I look good with the weight on but I don't like the weight. I ave a low self esteem. I been eatting sugar which I shouldn't be. So today I am keeping the weight thing in mind and I am not eating any snaks at work today. My husband...

nycbt · nycbt

WHEN I WAS A BABY When I was a little baby, my real mother did drugs and drank. She used to leave my brother and me alone while she went out. When she went out and left us alone, I used to feel angry, scared, frighten, about what would happen to me if she doesn’t come back. Because of her being drunk or...

WStar · WStar

Hello all, Today was a crappy day not trying to complain there are bigger things to piss and moan about. It started out my dog got sick took to the vet .Vet called back my dog died.Broken hearted I'm stund. Why in life does it take lossing somebody,something tha...

trishlafish · trishlafish

Hi, I am brand new to the whole Al-anon thing. I am still trying to figure it all out. I attended my first face to face meeting last nite. Does anyone have any suggestions on where to start? i feel so lost and hopeless. I grew up in an alcoholic household. I never realized how it affected me. I have n...

De Anna · De Anna

I started this program in March. I was at my bottom, yet I couldn't see up, isn't that ironic. 3 months into this program & it has given me important guidelines. My hub hasn't changed, & I don't know that he will. I do know I've changed. I used to be angr...

nycbt · nycbt

When I started Alanon, he still was drinking. Our cat died and we were fighting so I left and went to the diner and called him to see how he was doing he started screaming and yelling, so I hung up the phone and ate my diner. He wanted something to eat so I brought something to eat and when I came home he had hate...

Powerless · Powerless

I feel like I am really starting to get steps one and two. My husband has been making a lot of poor choices, but I have not tried to correct him. Even when he asks my opinion I tell him to weight out his options and make his own decisions. his pick up truck is about to be repossessed Friday...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

A little girl had been shopping with her Mom in Target. She must have been 6 years old, this beautiful red haired, freckle faced image of innocence. It was pouring outside. The kind of rain that gushes over the top of rain gutters, so much in a hurry to hit the earth it has no time to flow down the spout. We al...

megan · megan

Said to me by my co-worker this morning as we talked. He said that he has alot of emotional scars from growing up with 2 alcoholic parents He got alot of physical and mental pain and is struggling with his emotions over it. I gave him my "Hope for Today" book. Its an okay book but not too...

nycbt · nycbt

The things that are posted in section our my life story which I broke down into section hoping that I could help some of you out there. An it is good to hear feed back. Thanks

debilyn · debilyn

Hi, well I was not sure how to respond when A did call. I saw it was him and took a breath. I said hello, he immediately said how are you? I changed the subject quickly. I told him I will not be telling him anything about me. Neither will my loved ones. That I have learned who really loves me the last fe...

lilleah · lilleah

ok, my A decided NOT to go to the bar, and somehow, I know I will be blamed for this! I will be blamed b/c I didn't tell him which bar to go to! All I said was how I would like it if he stayed close to home, and didn't drive to the bar he used to go to which is across town. We moved, so now he is further away from that bar...

nycbt · nycbt

ALCOHOLIC FATHER My foster father turned adopted father was also an alcoholic. When my adopted father drank, I was upset, angry, and very disappointed in him. I lost trust in any promises he had. I wouldn’t believe anything he said when it came to going anywhere. I would wait outside for him and he wo...

sanddie · sanddie

I am not sure if any of you are familiar with this place. However, thought I'd share it with you, as it is a rehabilitation center for teens with substance abuse. I went there last week to see what they offered for adolescents. I wanted to stay--it was phenomena...

nycbt · nycbt

RICK’S SON MOVED IN In Jan of 2004 Feb. his son moved into a very small apt. He was supposed to be there for a little while. Rick drank so bad when he moved in her would start fighting and naming calling. He would start hanging out with people that were also drinkers. Two of them were drunk all the...

lilleah · lilleah

sorry I haven't posted in awhile, I had my baby 6wks ago and have been very busy. How is everyone? My A was good for awhile, he didn't go out all the time, and we would go together, but now he is blaming me for not going anywhere, and just being generally miserable. He has told me about 3 times recently that he...

nycbt · nycbt

I am proud of the progress that I have made in the last six months. My tempter: I have been getting very good with that. I haven't thrown glass, cut my self, only a couple of times started screaming. I have calm down quicker then I used to. I am trying to work on the things I like to do like reading, sittin...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi, Just thinking today. I talked to the kids about what they want, and they basically told me it is my decision. They told me they love him and wish he would sober up. They said that they would prefer he wasn't with his parents becasue it is hard to even call him, as they answer the phone, and none of them w...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi everyone, I haven't posted recently, I have been running around helping get ready for the Proms and Graduation. My sons Prom was on Friday night, he looked so handsome and of course I cried. His girlfriend looked lovely and they had a wonderful time. One down, one more Prom next weekend and two gra...

AlaMom · AlaMom

Hiya Everyone, Well we have closed on our new home. Myself and 5 teens moved all day on Friday to get us in there but we are in. Husband came home from work and couldnt believe that we pulled it all off in one day without him. He wasnt able to help with the move because of work...

jj · jj

I posted the other night about how hubby and I had gone to a friends and it ended up with me not ever wanting to go out like that again. Well I was upset and angry about what had happend and I don't think that I made the situation clear. Hubby had gone a week with out getting drunk and I had had reserv...

Jolert · Jolert

Hello, my name is Jenny. This is my first post to this board, reading other messages here the last few days has helped me. Hopefully sharing this will help others as well as myself. I'd also like to meet some people here who could provide good examples and share support. I live with my husband who is an a...

John · John

http://www.12stepforums.net/mid/musicballs.wmv Click the Link Above and put a smile on your face. John

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

My hubby stepped over the line a few nights ago. He physically harmed my 23 year old son. (Son is okay now but he did have to go to ER and we had to watch him for concussion.) Hubby is out of the house and I have stated he has to go for help if he wants to be here in this relationship and family...

chad79 · chad79

I am a 25 year old male in Iowa. I have never really ever drank myself because of my mom. She had me in high school and then got pregant again 6 years later and got married. Then she had another baby early and he died a few months later of SIDS and that was hard on her, then she got divorced and had a...

nmike · nmike

My husband moved out June 1st to a new town and a new job. We agreed on this date because it was after our last son's high school graduation and I would be on a trip. We didn't talk to each other for a week. He had originally said that he didn't want to talk to me or do anything with me for a year. Now, that is extre...

debilyn · debilyn

Been thinking and praying for you. What a hard thing to deal with. I know you love your family very much and do your best for them. One thing Kis that I have to say, abuse is NOT from being an alcoholic. It is a totally separate problem. Same as if they cheat, totally not from being A. Even if the...

nycbt · nycbt

Since I ave join the Alanon program, I have gain more friends. It is nice to have people I can talk to. A place where I feel safe. A place I know that they will not judge me. What every I tell them they understand because they have been there. Lately I have been opening up in the face to face meeting wh...

holly123 · holly123

I was just reading Chad's post and while responding I realized how much I had learned in the year I have been here about detachment. When I first started I believed detachment meant, put a big wall up between you and don't do anything for them. I completely missed the with love part of the...

nycbt · nycbt

On Saturday I got into a minor accident. I was a little upset but I had faith that everything would work out. I was glad that my hight power was watching over me. On Saturday I was going through a street that had cars park on both sides and very packed. I went through the street very happy that I made it. Cam...

gardengal · gardengal

This disease of alcoholism is a cunning, baffling, inciduous disease. As we become increasingly aware of the family disease, many of us discover that we have performed a particular function in our family or group. Friends and family members play a wide variety of supporting roles in the fami...

megan · megan

I have found an apartment. i filled out the app, left a deposit and am waiting on the credit check i like the apartment. it is on the third floor on the corner with a view of NYC. it will cost me $4000 to move in. I only have $4000 if i do not pay my credit card bill. It is $3000 due to living in the hotel. So I...

nycbt · nycbt

I don't know about any of you but sometimes I get very obessed about things, whether it is eating something I am not supposed to have, or calling someone. It is like something takes over your body and you can't control what is happening. I have lots of obessions that get me into alot of trobule at times. ...

debilyn · debilyn

I was afraid I would get into trouble with my last post. Felt it was negative and not my usual, forgive the A becuz he is sick. Was pleasantly surprised at the great responses!! Thank you! SMOINKS, SMOINKS, SMOINKS!! (smack + oink) So today I calmly took down our marriage license, took d...

holly123 · holly123

I just wanted to thank everyone for their responses to my post "Its working!!!!". I was feeling a little down because friday night yet again he stayed out late at his friends, he was supposed to be home at 6:00 to watch my son but never showed up to releave his family, when I got back from my da...

Phil · Phil

Patience is the ability to: Sit back and wait for an expected outcome without experiencing anxiety, tension, or frustration. Let go of your need for immediate gratification. Display tolerance, compassion, understanding, and acceptance toward those who are slower than you in developing maturi...

wille · wille

Hi all, Howdy! I promise to put a blurb on site re the movie, "What the bleep do we know." It is a movie that explores the reconstruction of one's reality. It is based on physical laws - as one changes their mindset, their reality shifts. Neurons and sysapses regroup that affect real...

mom to 2 · mom to 2

Hello all, I'm in desperate need of insight. Long story short--binge drinking hubby entered a 30 day program in March. Did well there---came out and went on a week binge. Came home humiliated and shamed--started back to AA, calling his rehab friends, etc. Never...

Christy · Christy

My son is home in total misery, but the surgery is done. He said it feels like someone hit him in the face with a baseball bat. He has packing in his sinuses and a lovely gauze bandage under his nose for drainage. It's a good thing he's so wiped out or he'd be throwing a fit, saying he look...

Donna · Donna

I'm sitting here at 1:40 a.m. and of course, my A has not come back from the bar yet (where he's been for the last almost 10 hours--a 'short' outing for him)... It truly burns me that he can't make it home right after the bar closes. Where does he go? Honestly, thoughts race from him walking ho...

Jolert · Jolert

Hello everyone, Last night was so odd I need to share it, perhaps someone will have some comment or something. i needed to get out of the house and asked my A (sober for 2 weeks but not in program) if he was up to going to see a band at a neighborhood theatre with me. They do serve beer there and I would have...

Powerless · Powerless

I have started on my increased dosage of Prozac...hope it helps. the therapist told me to keep taking it and accept teh fact that I am depressed. I explained to her that I felt it was the most useless of emotions. I am just trying to wait it out and wait for things to get better. I...

debilyn · debilyn

I know a lot is becuz of my situation right now. Waiting for the ultra sound the 14th is pretty rough. Limbo is hard on us all. I woke at five am and drove to see A. He was very nice and appropriate. I mean he was empathetic and loving. Says he is clean and sober. Again I say that is not my concern. B...

gardengal · gardengal

Life is a package deal. It is not enough to look at the parts we like. It is necessary to face the whole picture so that we can make realistic choices for ourselves and stop setting ourselves up for the disappointment. Living with A's many of us coped with an ever-shifting situation in which our sense o...

Christy · Christy

My 15 yr old son is having surgery in the morning (7 a.m.) on his sinuses. I understand it's nothing major, but he's my baby and I'd sure feel better with some extra prayers. I just reread the paper the doctor gave me of possible complications, and OMG!..I shouldn't have..lol&nb...

teddybear · teddybear

Hi Everyone, What a surprise I had today!! Yesterday was a really difficult day for me, because I felt so misunderstood. We got up early in the morning, and my husband asked me to take a walk before breakfast. When we came back home, he decided to pull out weeds, so I ate breakfast alone.&...

nikkilou · nikkilou

Hi all, I was wondering what are the best books for a newcomer. I don't have alot of time (three kids) but know I need to start finding anwers. Also I don't go to face to face meetings. I am only onthis website. I have seen then here to oder but MY A dosen't like ordering over the...

debilyn · debilyn

You know, I feel like, if my A wanted help, he would get it. He is choosing to allow the disease to kill him. He is choosing not to be there for me. He chose not to be there for his dieing brother. I for one say I have had it. I hope I cont. to feel this way. I love him, I love how I love him. But it is wasted...

jj · jj

So Hubby and I got invited to a friends house, just supposed to be like a family thing with the kids. So any how I was informed this mornig that no kids were to be there and they were going to have this party rather than just a get together.... So of course going through ever thing that I am right...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	With Holding (Preview) Sometimes, to protect ourselves, we close ourselves off from a person we're in a relationship with. Our body may be present, but we're not. Shutting don, shutting off, closing ourselves and removing our emotionsl presence from a relationship is a powerful tool. We need to use it carefully and res...	jj	3	668	Jun 11, 2005 by jessi
	Step board - Step three (Preview) Hi - Step three is posted on the Step board. Please come and share your ES&H. Love in Recovery - Dot	dot	0	631	Jun 11, 2005 by dot
	another meeting (Preview) Hey all, It is been a while and I am still worknig my program and worknig my steps with my sponsor.This is my problem though I dont want to go to meetings.There are times I think I do not need them and then there are times I just dont want the hassel of it all.I have been in the program 2 years the a in my life is...	dori	4	905	Jun 11, 2005 by jessi
	Jeannie... (Preview) As long as he will go to the counselor....wow! It took my husband several attempts this time around to make it stick. He had years and years of denial, habits, etc. I believe we are on five months sobriety. One attempt at AA didn't get us here. &nbs...	wallsal55	0	511	Jun 11, 2005 by wallsal55
	HP please help us to follow your path (Preview) Hello everyone, I've been sitting here for an hour repeating the mantra ... oh Lord please help us both to find a way to follow your path ... this morning I decided I can not watch my husband go through the same cycle as every time in the last 12 years. I pulled out the seperation papers I had drawn u...	Jolert	3	786	Jun 11, 2005 by Jolert
	Trying to remind myself that I hate his disease and not him (Preview) I keep trying to remind myself that I hate his addiction and not him. It is his addiction that causes the behavior I am seeing. He tried to draw me into an arguement today, although I responded, I caught myself and let it go. He found someone to buy his pickup truck for $3,000. I...	Powerless	3	861	Jun 10, 2005 by Annie
	Prayers Needed (Preview) Below is an email I received from another MIP member who asked me to share with group. HI~How are U? I am letting you know that I will not be in AlAnon for while~I just found out last night that my best friend had been in serious car accident and her daughter was in with her Mom and wa...	kismetstrand	7	819	Jun 10, 2005 by wille
	One more try (Preview) Hi everyone, Well we went to the counselor again tonight. My husband was not drinking and was in good spirits. The kids and I told him what was on our minds. We told him how much we love him, miss him and how much we do want him home and well. We all decided that we are going to try. I would say one las...	Jeannie	11	728	Jun 10, 2005 by Diva
	need help (Preview) Thank you, some of you, who i met in the chat room earlier. this is the first time i have attempted to get help. i am the spouse of an alcoholic, who feels i am his biggest trigger right now. i am scared. my husband relapsed after 3 and 1/2 years of sobriety. i may have triggered him....pushed him , becau...	Aspouse	12	671	Jun 10, 2005 by Diva
	My Anniversary (Preview) Hi everyone, I am feeling very down today. Yesterday was my 10th Anniversary and it went unnoticed by all. My mother in law did ask what she should get us and my mom the same but as far as my husband went, I had to remind him and then it was dropped. I am real...	holly123	3	1039	Jun 10, 2005 by nmike
	need help finding meetings - nc (Preview) hi - i'm new to wilmington, nc and would like to find meetings of al-anon, or aa if that's all that's here - feel very stressed out and could use some good support !!! - thanks - john	jpquack	3	2612	Jun 10, 2005 by kerry5
	WEIGHT (Preview) Recently I have put on some weight that is bothering me to death. Alot of people say I look good with the weight on but I don't like the weight. I ave a low self esteem. I been eatting sugar which I shouldn't be. So today I am keeping the weight thing in mind and I am not eating any snaks at work today. My husband...	nycbt	7	721	Jun 9, 2005 by dori
	WHEN I WAS A BABY (Preview) WHEN I WAS A BABY When I was a little baby, my real mother did drugs and drank. She used to leave my brother and me alone while she went out. When she went out and left us alone, I used to feel angry, scared, frighten, about what would happen to me if she doesn’t come back. Because of her being drunk or...	nycbt	1	845	Jun 9, 2005 by KathyS
	Canine vs. Human (Preview) Hello all, Today was a crappy day not trying to complain there are bigger things to piss and moan about. It started out my dog got sick took to the vet .Vet called back my dog died.Broken hearted I'm stund. Why in life does it take lossing somebody,something tha...	WStar	5	865	Jun 9, 2005 by kismetstrand
	i am new (Preview) Hi, I am brand new to the whole Al-anon thing. I am still trying to figure it all out. I attended my first face to face meeting last nite. Does anyone have any suggestions on where to start? i feel so lost and hopeless. I grew up in an alcoholic household. I never realized how it affected me. I have n...	trishlafish	8	957	Jun 9, 2005 by delucagirl
	going on.....alone? (Preview) I started this program in March. I was at my bottom, yet I couldn't see up, isn't that ironic. 3 months into this program & it has given me important guidelines. My hub hasn't changed, & I don't know that he will. I do know I've changed. I used to be angr...	De Anna	6	788	Jun 9, 2005 by sandie123
	STARTED ALANON (Preview) When I started Alanon, he still was drinking. Our cat died and we were fighting so I left and went to the diner and called him to see how he was doing he started screaming and yelling, so I hung up the phone and ate my diner. He wanted something to eat so I brought something to eat and when I came home he had hate...	nycbt	1	540	Jun 9, 2005 by lin0606
	Really getting steps one and two (Preview) I feel like I am really starting to get steps one and two. My husband has been making a lot of poor choices, but I have not tried to correct him. Even when he asks my opinion I tell him to weight out his options and make his own decisions. his pick up truck is about to be repossessed Friday...	Powerless	5	865	Jun 9, 2005 by dot
	Run Through The Rain (Preview) A little girl had been shopping with her Mom in Target. She must have been 6 years old, this beautiful red haired, freckle faced image of innocence. It was pouring outside. The kind of rain that gushes over the top of rain gutters, so much in a hurry to hit the earth it has no time to flow down the spout. We al...	kismetstrand	5	925	Jun 9, 2005 by Jolert
	Even a dog can be conditioned to starve (Preview) Said to me by my co-worker this morning as we talked. He said that he has alot of emotional scars from growing up with 2 alcoholic parents He got alot of physical and mental pain and is struggling with his emotions over it. I gave him my "Hope for Today" book. Its an okay book but not too...	megan	1	708	Jun 9, 2005 by Jolert
	my life story (Preview) The things that are posted in section our my life story which I broke down into section hoping that I could help some of you out there. An it is good to hear feed back. Thanks	nycbt	1	662	Jun 9, 2005 by Jolert
	A called/update (Preview) Hi, well I was not sure how to respond when A did call. I saw it was him and took a breath. I said hello, he immediately said how are you? I changed the subject quickly. I told him I will not be telling him anything about me. Neither will my loved ones. That I have learned who really loves me the last fe...	debilyn	5	917	Jun 8, 2005 by Jeannie
	taking the blame again! (Preview) ok, my A decided NOT to go to the bar, and somehow, I know I will be blamed for this! I will be blamed b/c I didn't tell him which bar to go to! All I said was how I would like it if he stayed close to home, and didn't drive to the bar he used to go to which is across town. We moved, so now he is further away from that bar...	lilleah	5	928	Jun 8, 2005 by Jill
	my adopted father (Preview) ALCOHOLIC FATHER My foster father turned adopted father was also an alcoholic. When my adopted father drank, I was upset, angry, and very disappointed in him. I lost trust in any promises he had. I wouldn’t believe anything he said when it came to going anywhere. I would wait outside for him and he wo...	nycbt	2	848	Jun 8, 2005 by nycbt
	Adolescent Treatment Facility...... (Preview) I am not sure if any of you are familiar with this place. However, thought I'd share it with you, as it is a rehabilitation center for teens with substance abuse. I went there last week to see what they offered for adolescents. I wanted to stay--it was phenomena...	sanddie	0	654	Jun 8, 2005 by sanddie
	RICK’S SON MOVED IN (Preview) RICK’S SON MOVED IN In Jan of 2004 Feb. his son moved into a very small apt. He was supposed to be there for a little while. Rick drank so bad when he moved in her would start fighting and naming calling. He would start hanging out with people that were also drinkers. Two of them were drunk all the...	nycbt	0	606	Jun 8, 2005 by nycbt
	hi-sorry I haven't posted in awhile (Preview) sorry I haven't posted in awhile, I had my baby 6wks ago and have been very busy. How is everyone? My A was good for awhile, he didn't go out all the time, and we would go together, but now he is blaming me for not going anywhere, and just being generally miserable. He has told me about 3 times recently that he...	lilleah	2	799	Jun 8, 2005 by jj
	PROUD OF ME (Preview) I am proud of the progress that I have made in the last six months. My tempter: I have been getting very good with that. I haven't thrown glass, cut my self, only a couple of times started screaming. I have calm down quicker then I used to. I am trying to work on the things I like to do like reading, sittin...	nycbt	3	778	Jun 8, 2005 by jj
	Decisions (Preview) Hi, Just thinking today. I talked to the kids about what they want, and they basically told me it is my decision. They told me they love him and wish he would sober up. They said that they would prefer he wasn't with his parents becasue it is hard to even call him, as they answer the phone, and none of them w...	Jeannie	8	857	Jun 7, 2005 by honeybunnydog
	Not sure how to proceed (Preview) Hi everyone, I haven't posted recently, I have been running around helping get ready for the Proms and Graduation. My sons Prom was on Friday night, he looked so handsome and of course I cried. His girlfriend looked lovely and they had a wonderful time. One down, one more Prom next weekend and two gra...	Jeannie	8	1033	Jun 7, 2005 by jo4
	A Great Success... (Preview) Hiya Everyone, Well we have closed on our new home. Myself and 5 teens moved all day on Friday to get us in there but we are in. Husband came home from work and couldnt believe that we pulled it all off in one day without him. He wasnt able to help with the move because of work...	AlaMom	8	866	Jun 7, 2005 by cloud
	Isolation (Preview) I posted the other night about how hubby and I had gone to a friends and it ended up with me not ever wanting to go out like that again. Well I was upset and angry about what had happend and I don't think that I made the situation clear. Hubby had gone a week with out getting drunk and I had had reserv...	jj	3	619	Jun 7, 2005 by nmike
	Hello out there!!! (Preview) Hello, my name is Jenny. This is my first post to this board, reading other messages here the last few days has helped me. Hopefully sharing this will help others as well as myself. I'd also like to meet some people here who could provide good examples and share support. I live with my husband who is an a...	Jolert	8	938	Jun 7, 2005 by Jolert
	Talent Show (Preview) http://www.12stepforums.net/mid/musicballs.wmv Click the Link Above and put a smile on your face. John	John	2	821	Jun 7, 2005 by jj
	HELP (Preview) My hubby stepped over the line a few nights ago. He physically harmed my 23 year old son. (Son is okay now but he did have to go to ER and we had to watch him for concussion.) Hubby is out of the house and I have stated he has to go for help if he wants to be here in this relationship and family...	kismetstrand	13	694	Jun 7, 2005 by bob6502
	New to Board - Need Advice (Preview) I am a 25 year old male in Iowa. I have never really ever drank myself because of my mom. She had me in high school and then got pregant again 6 years later and got married. Then she had another baby early and he died a few months later of SIDS and that was hard on her, then she got divorced and had a...	chad79	9	999	Jun 7, 2005 by lin0606
	He's gone (Preview) My husband moved out June 1st to a new town and a new job. We agreed on this date because it was after our last son's high school graduation and I would be on a trip. We didn't talk to each other for a week. He had originally said that he didn't want to talk to me or do anything with me for a year. Now, that is extre...	nmike	5	968	Jun 7, 2005 by abbyal
	kis (Preview) Been thinking and praying for you. What a hard thing to deal with. I know you love your family very much and do your best for them. One thing Kis that I have to say, abuse is NOT from being an alcoholic. It is a totally separate problem. Same as if they cheat, totally not from being A. Even if the...	debilyn	1	768	Jun 7, 2005 by kismetstrand
	FRIENDS/God (Preview) Since I ave join the Alanon program, I have gain more friends. It is nice to have people I can talk to. A place where I feel safe. A place I know that they will not judge me. What every I tell them they understand because they have been there. Lately I have been opening up in the face to face meeting wh...	nycbt	0	604	Jun 7, 2005 by nycbt
	Detachment (Preview) I was just reading Chad's post and while responding I realized how much I had learned in the year I have been here about detachment. When I first started I believed detachment meant, put a big wall up between you and don't do anything for them. I completely missed the with love part of the...	holly123	3	868	Jun 7, 2005 by nycbt
	SATURDAY (Preview) On Saturday I got into a minor accident. I was a little upset but I had faith that everything would work out. I was glad that my hight power was watching over me. On Saturday I was going through a street that had cars park on both sides and very packed. I went through the street very happy that I made it. Cam...	nycbt	1	700	Jun 7, 2005 by holly123
	Are we blaming ourselves for the A's actions? (Preview) This disease of alcoholism is a cunning, baffling, inciduous disease. As we become increasingly aware of the family disease, many of us discover that we have performed a particular function in our family or group. Friends and family members play a wide variety of supporting roles in the fami...	gardengal	0	719	Jun 7, 2005 by gardengal
	My apartment (Preview) I have found an apartment. i filled out the app, left a deposit and am waiting on the credit check i like the apartment. it is on the third floor on the corner with a view of NYC. it will cost me $4000 to move in. I only have $4000 if i do not pay my credit card bill. It is $3000 due to living in the hotel. So I...	megan	8	1049	Jun 7, 2005 by nycbt
	Obession (Preview) I don't know about any of you but sometimes I get very obessed about things, whether it is eating something I am not supposed to have, or calling someone. It is like something takes over your body and you can't control what is happening. I have lots of obessions that get me into alot of trobule at times. ...	nycbt	7	862	Jun 7, 2005 by nycbt
	you guys are cool! (Preview) I was afraid I would get into trouble with my last post. Felt it was negative and not my usual, forgive the A becuz he is sick. Was pleasantly surprised at the great responses!! Thank you! SMOINKS, SMOINKS, SMOINKS!! (smack + oink) So today I calmly took down our marriage license, took d...	debilyn	2	558	Jun 6, 2005 by debilyn
	Wow, Thanks (Preview) I just wanted to thank everyone for their responses to my post "Its working!!!!". I was feeling a little down because friday night yet again he stayed out late at his friends, he was supposed to be home at 6:00 to watch my son but never showed up to releave his family, when I got back from my da...	holly123	2	687	Jun 6, 2005 by gardengal
	Patience (Preview) Patience is the ability to: Sit back and wait for an expected outcome without experiencing anxiety, tension, or frustration. Let go of your need for immediate gratification. Display tolerance, compassion, understanding, and acceptance toward those who are slower than you in developing maturi...	Phil	1	849	Jun 6, 2005 by efd354
	What the bleep (Preview) Hi all, Howdy! I promise to put a blurb on site re the movie, "What the bleep do we know." It is a movie that explores the reconstruction of one's reality. It is based on physical laws - as one changes their mindset, their reality shifts. Neurons and sysapses regroup that affect real...	wille	1	764	Jun 6, 2005 by DanaAngel
	looking for insight during early "recovery" (Preview) Hello all, I'm in desperate need of insight. Long story short--binge drinking hubby entered a 30 day program in March. Did well there---came out and went on a week binge. Came home humiliated and shamed--started back to AA, calling his rehab friends, etc. Never...	mom to 2	7	2122	Jun 6, 2005 by mom to 2
	Surgery update (Preview) My son is home in total misery, but the surgery is done. He said it feels like someone hit him in the face with a baseball bat. He has packing in his sinuses and a lovely gauze bandage under his nose for drainage. It's a good thing he's so wiped out or he'd be throwing a fit, saying he look...	Christy	4	719	Jun 6, 2005 by kerry5
	infuriated again.. (Preview) I'm sitting here at 1:40 a.m. and of course, my A has not come back from the bar yet (where he's been for the last almost 10 hours--a 'short' outing for him)... It truly burns me that he can't make it home right after the bar closes. Where does he go? Honestly, thoughts race from him walking ho...	Donna	9	899	Jun 6, 2005 by holly123
	Strange night (Preview) Hello everyone, Last night was so odd I need to share it, perhaps someone will have some comment or something. i needed to get out of the house and asked my A (sober for 2 weeks but not in program) if he was up to going to see a band at a neighborhood theatre with me. They do serve beer there and I would have...	Jolert	4	588	Jun 6, 2005 by Jolert
	Life spiraling out of control (Preview) I have started on my increased dosage of Prozac...hope it helps. the therapist told me to keep taking it and accept teh fact that I am depressed. I explained to her that I felt it was the most useless of emotions. I am just trying to wait it out and wait for things to get better. I...	Powerless	3	672	Jun 6, 2005 by Jeannie
	Please help me understand (Preview) I know a lot is becuz of my situation right now. Waiting for the ultra sound the 14th is pretty rough. Limbo is hard on us all. I woke at five am and drove to see A. He was very nice and appropriate. I mean he was empathetic and loving. Says he is clean and sober. Again I say that is not my concern. B...	debilyn	6	612	Jun 6, 2005 by Jeannie
	Are we ready to face reality? (Preview) Life is a package deal. It is not enough to look at the parts we like. It is necessary to face the whole picture so that we can make realistic choices for ourselves and stop setting ourselves up for the disappointment. Living with A's many of us coped with an ever-shifting situation in which our sense o...	gardengal	2	926	Jun 6, 2005 by Jeannie
	Prayer Request Please (Preview) My 15 yr old son is having surgery in the morning (7 a.m.) on his sinuses. I understand it's nothing major, but he's my baby and I'd sure feel better with some extra prayers. I just reread the paper the doctor gave me of possible complications, and OMG!..I shouldn't have..lol&nb...	Christy	7	604	Jun 6, 2005 by gardengal
	Communication?? (Preview) Hi Everyone, What a surprise I had today!! Yesterday was a really difficult day for me, because I felt so misunderstood. We got up early in the morning, and my husband asked me to take a walk before breakfast. When we came back home, he decided to pull out weeds, so I ate breakfast alone.&...	teddybear	3	769	Jun 6, 2005 by Jeannie
	books (Preview) Hi all, I was wondering what are the best books for a newcomer. I don't have alot of time (three kids) but know I need to start finding anwers. Also I don't go to face to face meetings. I am only onthis website. I have seen then here to oder but MY A dosen't like ordering over the...	nikkilou	4	761	Jun 6, 2005 by Jeannie
	today these are my thoughts (Preview) You know, I feel like, if my A wanted help, he would get it. He is choosing to allow the disease to kill him. He is choosing not to be there for me. He chose not to be there for his dieing brother. I for one say I have had it. I hope I cont. to feel this way. I love him, I love how I love him. But it is wasted...	debilyn	3	757	Jun 6, 2005 by Jeannie
	What Would you do?? (Preview) So Hubby and I got invited to a friends house, just supposed to be like a family thing with the kids. So any how I was informed this mornig that no kids were to be there and they were going to have this party rather than just a get together.... So of course going through ever thing that I am right...	jj	5	1002	Jun 5, 2005 by bcanuck
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.