Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Spoiler alert: we can't, and trying to leads to frustration for all. So concluded today's author who acknowledged trying to change a spouse's by trying to determine their thoughts and then attempting to steer them as they thought best. Alanon suggests this is not our job, right or responsibility, w...

Lyne · Lyne

This writer thought that anger, resentment, jealousy, and fear were "bad" feelings. But program says feelings are not bad or good--they are just a part of who we are. The writer goes on to say that good can sometimes come from those feelings: -anger can prompt constructive change-resentment can b...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I moved to a new State with my youngest daughter and left my husband since after a few years of begging him to treat her in a loving manner and his refusal, I did what was right for her mental health. He had gone as far as to laugh when she was feeling suicidal when she couldn't understand why her birth father...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Todays reading is a focus on learning to resist the need to control, especially the behavior of other people, in our lives. The writer describes preparing for a visit from family, which often instigates a relapse into compulsive controlling behavior on the writers part. Th...

DM2021 · DM2021

In todays reading the author talks about how they found it difficult to hold back in response to "insults and rudeness." That they thought that Al-Anon told them that they did not have to "accept unacceptable behavior." Instead we are reminded that Al-Anon tries to teach us that we should not all...

Youknowme · Youknowme

Today's C2C speaks of the benefits to both speaker and listener when sharing, honestly and fearlessly, as per the 5th step. Sharing our experiences and disclosing our poor decisions and motivations to the right person or people in the right setting achieves so much more than simply lightening the b...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on their relationship with change. They share that they used to fear change. Although living with alcoholism was living in constant chaos, it was familiar chaos and this lead them to feel that they have some control over the chaos. Thanks to Al-An...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Recovery is not an option. For me it is necessary. I have been experiencing a lot of issues out of my control. I feel that I would rather call things I go through issues rather than problems. Sometimes I guess these are relevant & really not interchangeable. I am so glad that I might be lessening the l...

Lyne · Lyne

This writer ponders the two ways of looking at the decision to stay with an A: 1) One can say, I just won't put up with it, or 2) We can correct our faults, keep our mouth closed, and keep hands off of other's problems. Alcoholism is only one of the disasters that can affect a marriage. It is suggested that...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about defining spiritual concepts for ourselves within Alanon. The writer describes coming to the program and feeling apathetic about a Higher Power. For the writer, reading through the steps and all the references to God was met with skepticism. What rea...

DM2021 · DM2021

Todays reading points out how our most "negative thoughts" seem like reality/truth/prophecy. Accepting that "todays choices" (hence living One-Day-At-A-Time) and trusting our future toour HP is what will help us grow from that negativity we may be harboring on a daily basis.Reminder: "Toda...

Youknowme · Youknowme

Today's c2c talks about realising that sometimes "problems" can turn out to be blessings in disguise and it cites the example of being so exhausted from lack of sleep due to worry that the writer was unable to act against her own best interests. This is certainly an interesting take on stress-relate...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's C2C, the author shares that living with the disease of alcoholism taught them that it was best to not hope for anything. The heartbreak of getting hopes up, only to be disappointed again and again was too much to bear. Eventually, the author shut down all their feelings and refus...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

This author resolves to treasure moments of time as opportunities to strengthen relationships and better self. Regardless of circumstances, the 12 Steps can help us do that as will meetings, readings and associating with fellow Alanoners. In each moment, I can make a positive impact. Time as curr...

Lyne · Lyne

The writer speaks about when dealing with a change, problem, or discovery, awareness frequently is followed by acceptance, and then action can be taken. We call this process the Three A's: awareness, acceptance, and action. A new awareness can be uncomfortable, but unless we can face reality,...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about being aware of the balance in our lives. The writer describes thinking of recovery as a triangle: Higher Power at the top, Al-anon tools such as steps, meetings, service next, the individuals physical, emotional and spiritual health next, and job, fa...

DM2021 · DM2021

Todays reading reminds us that help comes to each of us in such positive and wondrous ways,especially during meetings and posts.The reading goes on to say that we are reminded that "miracles" do happen and that we arenot alone, all we need do is reach out or share.Quote: "As I walk, As I walk, The unive...

GardenLady · GardenLady

Hello everyone! I'm looking for supportive stories about new sobriety as I am working through some challenging emotions and situations. My DH and I are poly and have a closed triad with our partner (m). DH has struggled with alcohol addiction for many years and recently received his second DUI (fir...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Powerful reading today that touches on the very heart of Alanon: dropping our efforts to control others. Controlling can take many forms: direct, subtly manipulative, outright reconstruction or light interference, obsessive observation, counseling, taking over their responsibilities. A...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! Today's reading is about tradition seven, and what it takes for a group to be fully self-supporting. The author reflects that self-supporting doesn't only involve paying rent, but that it also involves service positions, and people stepping up to make the group the kind of group that t...

Lyne · Lyne

Monday's reading speaks of discovering ourselves, as in the real person we are. Looking within can open our eyes to seeing what needs improving. We can be afraid we won't like what we see, and we may have doubts that we can change. However we may also find a surprise--many good qualities under layer...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is a reminder about how much we receive (with program work) when we give. The writer describes a time when she was not able to get around very easily and fell into a period of self pity. The writer was frustrated that the people surrounding her were not mind reading...

DM2021 · DM2021

Todays reading (a bit short and sweet today) talks to us about the grief caused by the damageand loss of loved ones/friends due to the disease of alcoholism.The reading goes on to say that part of dealing with that grief is admitting to oneself how theeffects of alcoholism changed their life and accep...

Youknowme · Youknowme

Today's reading discusses the importance of being willing to take inventory as a group in much the same way as we do as individuals, and the importance of doing this to uphold the second tradition. It's hard for me to comment on Group Conscience as I tend to "leave that to the grown-ups" (I know, that's v...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on anger. They share that usually, they are a gentle, easy-going person, but when they get angry, they unleash a torrent of angry profanity. What made them stop and think about their behavior was their little dog getting his paws tangled in an exten...

Lyne · Lyne

The writer talks about frustration and disappointments when we expect too much. It's good to have high standards, but only if we can accept with serenity, when the results fall short. We expect more of an alcoholic than they can deliver, and often the expectations we have for ourselves are way too d...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

This contributor acknowledges a time we may have reached the point in our family situation that seems to call for action, the end of our rope. They suggest, however, that rather than move directly to a course of action, perhaps even the 'obvious' one we have heard by well-intentioned but not thorough...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on their past efforts to change people to suit their own desires and needs. The author often thought of the problem as being with the other person if the author's needs weren't met. They wanted someone to be present, but not overly imposing. Upon fur...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Todays reading is a focus on learning who we are and how we define ourselves. The writer describes growing up in an alcoholic home and as a result, having a false sense of self. The writer felt invisible and without a voice. When the writer felt something, it felt like the exper...

DM2021 · DM2021

Todays reading talks about denial. Denial about the disease of alcoholism and denial of our own participation and asks us "why?" We are reminded that we alone cannot control or defeat the disease and therefore try to devise other methods to cope and one ofthem is denial.The reading goes on to say t...

SunnyFrog · SunnyFrog

Just looking for some ESH here on how you all deal with gaslighting from an A. That seems to be my biggest downfall at the moment, reacting to it and it's causing me to ride the crazy train again. Well, I am causing myself to ride it, I already know that. I'm just having a hard time stopping. Thanks in adva...

Youknowme · Youknowme

Today's C2C compares emotional growth (and the ability to experience emotions) with learning to play a piano; with mastery comes an appreciation for the highs and lows as they are a powerful reminder that we are alive and experiencing it fully. I think this is quite a beautiful reading and it gives a n...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

In the comfort and friendly confines of an Alanon meeting, one member noted the ease of smiling and good humor. Is this the face we present at home was one member's question to the group? Or do we exhibit our martyr face to express our unhappiness with other's decisions. Reminder - Do I use Martyr face to...

Notsonewbie · Notsonewbie

Ive been in Al Anon a couple of years and want to work the steps with a sponsor. Ive related to several women on zoom meetings but for valid reasons they are not available/ready to sponsor. How can I find one that is ready and willing? Feeling discouraged and even more alone.

Lyne · Lyne

The author came to alanon looking for instructions on how to become an adult. Lessons had come from parents, employers, spouses, children, friends--everybody except a Higher Power and oneself. The author could stop self-sabotaging if they stopped looking on the outside for something that cou...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about learning to trust our own judgment in making decisions, and allowing others to trust us as well. The writer describes having grown up in a home where the parents (in an overly controlling way) told the writer what to do. The response was two extremes: ei...

Youknowme · Youknowme

Today's C2C speaks of the principle of remaining unaffiliated with outside causes. It's an interesting one, because through al-anon many of us are freed from a life consumed by obsession with other people's lives and that leaves room for our own enrichment. Al-anon can't then be used as a platform t...

DM2021 · DM2021

Todays reading talks about how difficult it is sometimes to accept the fact that we love someone we cannot trust. How, with each disappointing incident we recover, only to be disappointed again! The reading goes on to say that our "heartache" can be alleviated if we learn to accept "reality" and t...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I read today's reading from C2C this morning. I realized that earlier this year I wasn't taking very good care of myself. I am doing so much better & am trying to fill the voids w/ healthy things. I don't work right now but I read somewhere that Saturday's child works hard for a living. I take it that li...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page reminds us that taking a timeout during stressful times may seem impossible but is exactly what we need to do. Making time for food, rest, Alanon refueling and other personal care is essential if we want to give ourselves the best chance of maintaining serenity. Reminder: I am the only p...

Lyne · Lyne

The writer says that when living with the chaos in an alcoholic family, it can be hard to know the difference between an inconvenience and a major crisis. The slogan, How Important Is It?, helps us put things in proportion. If plans fall through, an unexpected bill arrives, or we are disappointed in...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about learning to respond to feelings and emotions rather than react to them. The writer describes how life felt unmanageable when decisions were being made in reaction to uncomfortable emotions. Through program work, talking with sponsor, physical exe...

DM2021 · DM2021

Todays reading focuses on the Third Step which says that there are times that we need to "turn our will and life over to Gods care." The author discusses how when a family member was faced with a dire medical issue, how they felt they knew better for them. In the process of that struggle they found they...

Youknowme · Youknowme

Today's C2C talks of the power of attending al-anon meetings, especially when we are in a funk and don't want to go. The reading suggests those are the times a meeting can benefit us most, and when we are most likely to hear exactly what we needed to hear. I can't tell you how often al-anon, in one way or ano...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page reminds us that it is our point of focus that determines our level of anger and the negative impact to ourselves and others. Though unnecessary, it is often easier to fixate on the perceived wrong until our anger spills over and our attempts to punish the 'wrongdoer' consumes our though...

Skorpi · Skorpi

In today's reading, the author reflects on the words of the suggested closing: "...let there be no gossip or criticism of one another." The author realized that, although they try to leave their judgmental attitude at the door, they pick it up promptly after meetings and carry it with them, judgment...

DM2021 · DM2021

Todays reading speaks about how the author, before Al-Anon, had resentments that took up much of the writers days/years. They noticed, over time, that after getting involved in the Al-Anon program, that their need to justify how they felt; constantlyhashing over the grievances, blame and/or da...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

I may just be passing through or I may stay a little while. I had been working at the recovery house. Then, the pandemic hit. We all know how that story went. Eventually, I retired in April of last year, but just when ya thinks youre out, they pulls ya back in again. I think thats from one of the godfather mov...

Lyne · Lyne

Today's writer is preparing for change, tremendous change, when working Step 6. There can be great fear about if shedding too many characteristics; what will be left? The unknown can be terrifying, yet change is desired. HP is there for guidance, and yet in Step 6, one does not have to change anyth...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Todays reading is about how the tools and practices within alanon help us to find our rights and personal growth. The writer describes being affected by his/her fathers alcoholism by experiencing depression, overeating and low self-esteem. After attending several alanon meetings, the write...

Youknowme · Youknowme

I have just submitted the last assignment for my degree. I already know that I have passed. I'm telling you guys about it because man, it's been a crazy long road but I truly don't believe I could have pulled myself together well enough to finally get here without al-anon. In truth, there's a pretty good...

Youknowme · Youknowme

Hello everyone

Today's C2C speaks of developing the ability to accept and grow from constructive criticism because we are, at the same time, learning not to judge our personal value and worth on how we think others perceive us. It mentions being able to "risk disapproval" and having the courage t...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading from C2C, the author shares about their past. They initially insisted that alcoholism didn't exist in their family, and that everything was fine. They were totally normal. When the author began to accept that alcoholism was a disease that impacted the whole family, t...

Lyne · Lyne

The member discusses letting people take advantage of them. That caused an enormous amount of anger, resentment, and guilt. The member wondered why they denied their own feelings to gain someone else's approval. They realized they lacked courage. Would they be willing to accept that not ever...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

If only able to put Alanon slogans into practice, we could almost be spiritually perfect thought today's writer. Using Live and Let Live as an example, these four words encourage us to experience the rich joy and happiness that is possible when we are living at our best. Often more difficult, we are...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I walked through my fears w/ some anxiety. My friend from al anon helped immensely. She was there through the whole thing. I am far less afraid than I was. Today I am back on track & feel like I want to hang out w/ y'all again. It didn't take as long as I thought it would. I am grateful that I can return &...

Lyne · Lyne

I'm going to copy this paragraph: I came to alanon to discover how to get a loved one to stop drinking, hoping that my life would then return to normal. In alanon I came to understand that I did not cause alcoholism, I can't control it, and I can't cure it [the 3 C's]. But I can apply the Twelve Steps to my o...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is a focus on the power and role our minds play in recovery. The writer describes learning that the power of his/her own mind can help or hurt, but its a choice which way that will go. The writer then goes on to examine both steps 3 and 11 more thoroughly. In 3 (Made a d...

Youknowme · Youknowme

Today's C2C reading is a reminder that even though we might invest ourselves in recovery and seemingly see no results for long periods of time, moments of clarity, serenity and detachment can come seemingly out of the blue if we persist. They aren't "out of the blue" but in fact the culmination of fait...

DM2021 · DM2021

The author of todays reading writes about the spiritual aspect of Al-Anon (Step Two) and how the whole program is based on the ability of themembers to experience, the wonder of knowing that there is a "Power greater than ourselves, that which we can rely".The author is very clear, that there is "no pa...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	9/27/22 ODAT – How To: Manage Others’ Lives (Preview) Spoiler alert: we can't, and trying to leads to frustration for all. So concluded today's author who acknowledged trying to change a spouse's by trying to determine their thoughts and then attempting to steer them as they thought best. Alanon suggests this is not our job, right or responsibility, w...	Enigmatic	3	1198	Sep 27, 2022 by Youknowme
	C2C, Monday, 9/26, when negative becomes positive (Preview) This writer thought that anger, resentment, jealousy, and fear were "bad" feelings. But program says feelings are not bad or good--they are just a part of who we are. The writer goes on to say that good can sometimes come from those feelings: -anger can prompt constructive change-resentment can b...	Lyne	3	1302	Sep 27, 2022 by Enigmatic
	Starting over again.....Again (Preview) I moved to a new State with my youngest daughter and left my husband since after a few years of begging him to treat her in a loving manner and his refusal, I did what was right for her mental health. He had gone as far as to laugh when she was feeling suicidal when she couldn't understand why her birth father...	Breakingfree	4	1350	Sep 25, 2022 by Breakingfree
	Hope for Today Sept 25 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Todays reading is a focus on learning to resist the need to control, especially the behavior of other people, in our lives. The writer describes preparing for a visit from family, which often instigates a relapse into compulsive controlling behavior on the writers part. Th...	yanksfan51	0	1210	Sep 25, 2022 by yanksfan51
	C2C – September 23, 2022 (Preview) In todays reading the author talks about how they found it difficult to hold back in response to "insults and rudeness." That they thought that Al-Anon told them that they did not have to "accept unacceptable behavior." Instead we are reminded that Al-Anon tries to teach us that we should not all...	DM2021	2	1387	Sep 25, 2022 by Youknowme
	C2C September 22 Sharing with the right people in the right place (Preview) Today's C2C speaks of the benefits to both speaker and listener when sharing, honestly and fearlessly, as per the 5th step. Sharing our experiences and disclosing our poor decisions and motivations to the right person or people in the right setting achieves so much more than simply lightening the b...	Youknowme	3	1333	Sep 24, 2022 by serenity47
	Courage to Change Sept. 21 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on their relationship with change. They share that they used to fear change. Although living with alcoholism was living in constant chaos, it was familiar chaos and this lead them to feel that they have some control over the chaos. Thanks to Al-An...	Skorpi	2	1297	Sep 22, 2022 by Lyne
	recovery is not an option (Preview) Recovery is not an option. For me it is necessary. I have been experiencing a lot of issues out of my control. I feel that I would rather call things I go through issues rather than problems. Sometimes I guess these are relevant & really not interchangeable. I am so glad that I might be lessening the l...	Hoot Nanny	3	1420	Sep 21, 2022 by Breakingfree
	ODAT in alanon, Monday, 9/19, heads or tails (Preview) This writer ponders the two ways of looking at the decision to stay with an A: 1) One can say, I just won't put up with it, or 2) We can correct our faults, keep our mouth closed, and keep hands off of other's problems. Alcoholism is only one of the disasters that can affect a marriage. It is suggested that...	Lyne	2	1245	Sep 19, 2022 by DM2021
	Hope for Today Sept 18 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about defining spiritual concepts for ourselves within Alanon. The writer describes coming to the program and feeling apathetic about a Higher Power. For the writer, reading through the steps and all the references to God was met with skepticism. What rea...	yanksfan51	3	1007	Sep 18, 2022 by PosiesandPuppies
	C2C – September 16, 2022 (Preview) Todays reading points out how our most "negative thoughts" seem like reality/truth/prophecy. Accepting that "todays choices" (hence living One-Day-At-A-Time) and trusting our future toour HP is what will help us grow from that negativity we may be harboring on a daily basis.Reminder: "Toda...	DM2021	3	1452	Sep 16, 2022 by Daffodils
	c2c September 15th (Preview) Today's c2c talks about realising that sometimes "problems" can turn out to be blessings in disguise and it cites the example of being so exhausted from lack of sleep due to worry that the writer was unable to act against her own best interests. This is certainly an interesting take on stress-relate...	Youknowme	1	578	Sep 15, 2022 by Lyne
	Courage to Change September 14 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's C2C, the author shares that living with the disease of alcoholism taught them that it was best to not hope for anything. The heartbreak of getting hopes up, only to be disappointed again and again was too much to bear. Eventually, the author shut down all their feelings and refus...	Skorpi	2	607	Sep 15, 2022 by DM2021
	9/13/22 C2C What Have I Spent my 'Money' on Today… (Preview) This author resolves to treasure moments of time as opportunities to strengthen relationships and better self. Regardless of circumstances, the 12 Steps can help us do that as will meetings, readings and associating with fellow Alanoners. In each moment, I can make a positive impact. Time as curr...	Enigmatic	2	1263	Sep 14, 2022 by DM2021
	C2C, Monday, 9/12, acceptance is not submission (Preview) The writer speaks about when dealing with a change, problem, or discovery, awareness frequently is followed by acceptance, and then action can be taken. We call this process the Three A's: awareness, acceptance, and action. A new awareness can be uncomfortable, but unless we can face reality,...	Lyne	3	1388	Sep 12, 2022 by Daffodils
	Hope for Today Sept 11 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about being aware of the balance in our lives. The writer describes thinking of recovery as a triangle: Higher Power at the top, Al-anon tools such as steps, meetings, service next, the individuals physical, emotional and spiritual health next, and job, fa...	yanksfan51	1	1014	Sep 11, 2022 by DM2021
	C2C – September 09, 2022 (Preview) Todays reading reminds us that help comes to each of us in such positive and wondrous ways,especially during meetings and posts.The reading goes on to say that we are reminded that "miracles" do happen and that we arenot alone, all we need do is reach out or share.Quote: "As I walk, As I walk, The unive...	DM2021	4	1415	Sep 9, 2022 by Daffodils
	DH newly sober (yea!) - yet his behavior makes me worried... (Preview) Hello everyone! I'm looking for supportive stories about new sobriety as I am working through some challenging emotions and situations. My DH and I are poly and have a closed triad with our partner (m). DH has struggled with alcohol addiction for many years and recently received his second DUI (fir...	GardenLady	3	1016	Sep 8, 2022 by pinkchip
	9/6/22 ODAT – Get Off Their Back (Preview) Powerful reading today that touches on the very heart of Alanon: dropping our efforts to control others. Controlling can take many forms: direct, subtly manipulative, outright reconstruction or light interference, obsessive observation, counseling, taking over their responsibilities. A...	Enigmatic	5	1552	Sep 7, 2022 by Daffodils
	Courage to Change September 7 (Preview) Hello MIP! Today's reading is about tradition seven, and what it takes for a group to be fully self-supporting. The author reflects that self-supporting doesn't only involve paying rent, but that it also involves service positions, and people stepping up to make the group the kind of group that t...	Skorpi	3	1052	Sep 7, 2022 by Daffodils
	ODAT in alanon, Monday, 9/5, looking within (Preview) Monday's reading speaks of discovering ourselves, as in the real person we are. Looking within can open our eyes to seeing what needs improving. We can be afraid we won't like what we see, and we may have doubts that we can change. However we may also find a surprise--many good qualities under layer...	Lyne	2	1119	Sep 5, 2022 by DM2021
	Hope for Today Sept 4 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is a reminder about how much we receive (with program work) when we give. The writer describes a time when she was not able to get around very easily and fell into a period of self pity. The writer was frustrated that the people surrounding her were not mind reading...	yanksfan51	3	949	Sep 5, 2022 by DM2021
	C2C – September 02, 2022 (Preview) Todays reading (a bit short and sweet today) talks to us about the grief caused by the damageand loss of loved ones/friends due to the disease of alcoholism.The reading goes on to say that part of dealing with that grief is admitting to oneself how theeffects of alcoholism changed their life and accep...	DM2021	4	1777	Sep 3, 2022 by DM2021
	C2C September 1st (Preview) Today's reading discusses the importance of being willing to take inventory as a group in much the same way as we do as individuals, and the importance of doing this to uphold the second tradition. It's hard for me to comment on Group Conscience as I tend to "leave that to the grown-ups" (I know, that's v...	Youknowme	3	983	Sep 3, 2022 by Daffodils
	Courage to Change August 24 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on anger. They share that usually, they are a gentle, easy-going person, but when they get angry, they unleash a torrent of angry profanity. What made them stop and think about their behavior was their little dog getting his paws tangled in an exten...	Skorpi	2	1476	Sep 3, 2022 by Lyne
	ODAT in alanon, Monday, 8/29, expectations (Preview) The writer talks about frustration and disappointments when we expect too much. It's good to have high standards, but only if we can accept with serenity, when the results fall short. We expect more of an alcoholic than they can deliver, and often the expectations we have for ourselves are way too d...	Lyne	5	1435	Sep 1, 2022 by Lyne
	8/30/22 ODAT – Pause…Rework (Preview) This contributor acknowledges a time we may have reached the point in our family situation that seems to call for action, the end of our rope. They suggest, however, that rather than move directly to a course of action, perhaps even the 'obvious' one we have heard by well-intentioned but not thorough...	Enigmatic	3	548	Sep 1, 2022 by Youknowme
	Courage to Change August 31 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on their past efforts to change people to suit their own desires and needs. The author often thought of the problem as being with the other person if the author's needs weren't met. They wanted someone to be present, but not overly imposing. Upon fur...	Skorpi	2	1345	Sep 1, 2022 by Youknowme
	Hope for Today Aug 28 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Todays reading is a focus on learning who we are and how we define ourselves. The writer describes growing up in an alcoholic home and as a result, having a false sense of self. The writer felt invisible and without a voice. When the writer felt something, it felt like the exper...	yanksfan51	2	945	Aug 28, 2022 by PosiesandPuppies
	C2C – August 26, 2022 (Preview) Todays reading talks about denial. Denial about the disease of alcoholism and denial of our own participation and asks us "why?" We are reminded that we alone cannot control or defeat the disease and therefore try to devise other methods to cope and one ofthem is denial.The reading goes on to say t...	DM2021	4	1092	Aug 27, 2022 by DM2021
	Gaslighting (Preview) Just looking for some ESH here on how you all deal with gaslighting from an A. That seems to be my biggest downfall at the moment, reacting to it and it's causing me to ride the crazy train again. Well, I am causing myself to ride it, I already know that. I'm just having a hard time stopping. Thanks in adva...	SunnyFrog	6	1144	Aug 26, 2022 by SunnyFrog
	C2C August 25th (Preview) Today's C2C compares emotional growth (and the ability to experience emotions) with learning to play a piano; with mastery comes an appreciation for the highs and lows as they are a powerful reminder that we are alive and experiencing it fully. I think this is quite a beautiful reading and it gives a n...	Youknowme	3	1149	Aug 25, 2022 by Lyne
	8/22/22 ODAT - Resting Martyr Face (Preview) In the comfort and friendly confines of an Alanon meeting, one member noted the ease of smiling and good humor. Is this the face we present at home was one member's question to the group? Or do we exhibit our martyr face to express our unhappiness with other's decisions. Reminder - Do I use Martyr face to...	Enigmatic	5	1154	Aug 25, 2022 by Youknowme
	Finding a Sponsor (Preview) Ive been in Al Anon a couple of years and want to work the steps with a sponsor. Ive related to several women on zoom meetings but for valid reasons they are not available/ready to sponsor. How can I find one that is ready and willing? Feeling discouraged and even more alone.	Notsonewbie	4	1451	Aug 24, 2022 by Enigmatic
	Hope for Today, Monday, 8/22, self-sabotaging (Preview) The author came to alanon looking for instructions on how to become an adult. Lessons had come from parents, employers, spouses, children, friends--everybody except a Higher Power and oneself. The author could stop self-sabotaging if they stopped looking on the outside for something that cou...	Lyne	1	1056	Aug 22, 2022 by DM2021
	Hope for Today Aug 21 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about learning to trust our own judgment in making decisions, and allowing others to trust us as well. The writer describes having grown up in a home where the parents (in an overly controlling way) told the writer what to do. The response was two extremes: ei...	yanksfan51	2	1108	Aug 21, 2022 by SunnyFrog
	c2c August 18th (Preview) Today's C2C speaks of the principle of remaining unaffiliated with outside causes. It's an interesting one, because through al-anon many of us are freed from a life consumed by obsession with other people's lives and that leaves room for our own enrichment. Al-anon can't then be used as a platform t...	Youknowme	2	1145	Aug 19, 2022 by DM2021
	C2C – August 19, 2022 (Preview) Todays reading talks about how difficult it is sometimes to accept the fact that we love someone we cannot trust. How, with each disappointing incident we recover, only to be disappointed again! The reading goes on to say that our "heartache" can be alleviated if we learn to accept "reality" and t...	DM2021	1	1062	Aug 19, 2022 by Lyne
	today's reading & self care (Preview) I read today's reading from C2C this morning. I realized that earlier this year I wasn't taking very good care of myself. I am doing so much better & am trying to fill the voids w/ healthy things. I don't work right now but I read somewhere that Saturday's child works hard for a living. I take it that li...	Hoot Nanny	2	1086	Aug 17, 2022 by Lyne
	8/16/22 Remember to Take Care of You (Preview) Today's page reminds us that taking a timeout during stressful times may seem impossible but is exactly what we need to do. Making time for food, rest, Alanon refueling and other personal care is essential if we want to give ourselves the best chance of maintaining serenity. Reminder: I am the only p...	Enigmatic	2	1054	Aug 16, 2022 by Lyne
	C2C, Monday, 8/15, How important is it? (Preview) The writer says that when living with the chaos in an alcoholic family, it can be hard to know the difference between an inconvenience and a major crisis. The slogan, How Important Is It?, helps us put things in proportion. If plans fall through, an unexpected bill arrives, or we are disappointed in...	Lyne	1	1549	Aug 15, 2022 by DM2021
	Hope for Today Aug 14 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about learning to respond to feelings and emotions rather than react to them. The writer describes how life felt unmanageable when decisions were being made in reaction to uncomfortable emotions. Through program work, talking with sponsor, physical exe...	yanksfan51	2	1117	Aug 14, 2022 by PosiesandPuppies
	C2C – August 12, 2022 (Preview) Todays reading focuses on the Third Step which says that there are times that we need to "turn our will and life over to Gods care." The author discusses how when a family member was faced with a dire medical issue, how they felt they knew better for them. In the process of that struggle they found they...	DM2021	1	969	Aug 12, 2022 by Lyne
	C2C August 11th (Preview) Today's C2C talks of the power of attending al-anon meetings, especially when we are in a funk and don't want to go. The reading suggests those are the times a meeting can benefit us most, and when we are most likely to hear exactly what we needed to hear. I can't tell you how often al-anon, in one way or ano...	Youknowme	2	1067	Aug 11, 2022 by DM2021
	8/9/22 ODAT – Anger: Change our Focus, Change the Outcome (Preview) Today's page reminds us that it is our point of focus that determines our level of anger and the negative impact to ourselves and others. Though unnecessary, it is often easier to fixate on the perceived wrong until our anger spills over and our attempts to punish the 'wrongdoer' consumes our though...	Enigmatic	3	1146	Aug 9, 2022 by SunnyFrog
	Courage to Change July 27 (Preview) In today's reading, the author reflects on the words of the suggested closing: "...let there be no gossip or criticism of one another." The author realized that, although they try to leave their judgmental attitude at the door, they pick it up promptly after meetings and carry it with them, judgment...	Skorpi	2	1503	Aug 9, 2022 by DM2021
	C2C – August 05, 2022 (Preview) Todays reading speaks about how the author, before Al-Anon, had resentments that took up much of the writers days/years. They noticed, over time, that after getting involved in the Al-Anon program, that their need to justify how they felt; constantlyhashing over the grievances, blame and/or da...	DM2021	5	530	Aug 9, 2022 by DM2021
	The More Things Change...... (Preview) I may just be passing through or I may stay a little while. I had been working at the recovery house. Then, the pandemic hit. We all know how that story went. Eventually, I retired in April of last year, but just when ya thinks youre out, they pulls ya back in again. I think thats from one of the godfather mov...	Wolfie55	2	1020	Aug 9, 2022 by Enigmatic
	C2C, Monday, 8/8, preparing for change (Preview) Today's writer is preparing for change, tremendous change, when working Step 6. There can be great fear about if shedding too many characteristics; what will be left? The unknown can be terrifying, yet change is desired. HP is there for guidance, and yet in Step 6, one does not have to change anyth...	Lyne	1	1057	Aug 8, 2022 by DM2021
	Hope for Today Aug 7 (Preview) Todays reading is about how the tools and practices within alanon help us to find our rights and personal growth. The writer describes being affected by his/her fathers alcoholism by experiencing depression, overeating and low self-esteem. After attending several alanon meetings, the write...	yanksfan51	1	1097	Aug 7, 2022 by DM2021
	Woohoo! (Preview) I have just submitted the last assignment for my degree. I already know that I have passed. I'm telling you guys about it because man, it's been a crazy long road but I truly don't believe I could have pulled myself together well enough to finally get here without al-anon. In truth, there's a pretty good...	Youknowme	6	729	Aug 6, 2022 by Daffodils
	C2C August 4th (Preview) Hello everyone Today's C2C speaks of developing the ability to accept and grow from constructive criticism because we are, at the same time, learning not to judge our personal value and worth on how we think others perceive us. It mentions being able to "risk disapproval" and having the courage t...	Youknowme	4	390	Aug 6, 2022 by Enigmatic
	Courage to Change August 3 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading from C2C, the author shares about their past. They initially insisted that alcoholism didn't exist in their family, and that everything was fine. They were totally normal. When the author began to accept that alcoholism was a disease that impacted the whole family, t...	Skorpi	3	972	Aug 4, 2022 by Lyne
	C2C, Monday, 7/25, saying yes when you mean no (Preview) The member discusses letting people take advantage of them. That caused an enormous amount of anger, resentment, and guilt. The member wondered why they denied their own feelings to gain someone else's approval. They realized they lacked courage. Would they be willing to accept that not ever...	Lyne	7	1143	Aug 3, 2022 by DM2021
	8/2/22 ODAT - Live and Let Live: Compact, Powerful Program Message (Preview) If only able to put Alanon slogans into practice, we could almost be spiritually perfect thought today's writer. Using Live and Let Live as an example, these four words encourage us to experience the rich joy and happiness that is possible when we are living at our best. Often more difficult, we are...	Enigmatic	2	942	Aug 3, 2022 by Lyne
	I walked through my fears (Preview) I walked through my fears w/ some anxiety. My friend from al anon helped immensely. She was there through the whole thing. I am far less afraid than I was. Today I am back on track & feel like I want to hang out w/ y'all again. It didn't take as long as I thought it would. I am grateful that I can return &...	Hoot Nanny	2	1058	Aug 2, 2022 by DM2021
	C2C, Monday, 8/1, The essence of alanon (Preview) I'm going to copy this paragraph: I came to alanon to discover how to get a loved one to stop drinking, hoping that my life would then return to normal. In alanon I came to understand that I did not cause alcoholism, I can't control it, and I can't cure it [the 3 C's]. But I can apply the Twelve Steps to my o...	Lyne	1	1177	Aug 1, 2022 by DM2021
	Hope for Today July 31 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is a focus on the power and role our minds play in recovery. The writer describes learning that the power of his/her own mind can help or hurt, but its a choice which way that will go. The writer then goes on to examine both steps 3 and 11 more thoroughly. In 3 (Made a d...	yanksfan51	1	1196	Jul 31, 2022 by DM2021
	c2c 28/7 (Preview) Today's C2C reading is a reminder that even though we might invest ourselves in recovery and seemingly see no results for long periods of time, moments of clarity, serenity and detachment can come seemingly out of the blue if we persist. They aren't "out of the blue" but in fact the culmination of fait...	Youknowme	2	1570	Jul 30, 2022 by Lyne
	Spirituality – C2C – July 29, 2022 (Preview) The author of todays reading writes about the spiritual aspect of Al-Anon (Step Two) and how the whole program is based on the ability of themembers to experience, the wonder of knowing that there is a "Power greater than ourselves, that which we can rely".The author is very clear, that there is "no pa...	DM2021	1	1523	Jul 29, 2022 by Lyne
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.