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Our son's little alcoholic houseguest
(Preview)
My husband and I have been married for almost 28 years and have two grown children. Our oldest son, 27, just recently called to tell us he was getting a divorce, and oh yes, could he come back home to live because he now realized how “important” family is and he wants to start over. We told him...
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mizcathi
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7
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942
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kitty...
(Preview)
The quote below : Infidelity is a need for power, not a lack of love or romance. I am confused. (?) Seeking infidelity when feeling powerless in a committed relationship? Men needing a sense of power? &...
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wallsal55
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1
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402
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Confused
(Preview)
I am so afraid right now-----I want to run!
My A and I have spent some time apart this week, he needed to focus on self and so did I-now he wants to talk tonite-very afraid he wants to call it off-told him I need time before we talk but I think I am just avoiding him because I feel hes go...
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beachbaby
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3
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475
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One night at a time...
(Preview)
Well I am proud of myself last night. My "A" had some friends over and he got drunk. Not just the normal drunk, but the agrumentative drunk. And I just humored him and said things like "yes, honey" and "ok honey" and I didnt bite. The things h...
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kimmie
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6
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496
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my mom is an alcoholic!
(Preview)
Hi-
My mom is a alcoholic. I have been very hurt by her. If anyone needs to talk, I am here.
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princess433
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3
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412
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hope for us
(Preview)
I am really struggling with having any hope for them.
I cannot go there, for hoping for them, is a slip for me. I cannot think about them at all - I have done this for 20 years, I MUST think of myself.
Having hope for myself is a foreign & a new concept. I am trying to g...
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kitty
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1
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400
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forgive me room!
(Preview)
I spent the entire day w/ my mom & we made it to our first f2f (yaay for us!)
As I was driving home just now, I realized I made some comments at last night's chat mtg & I want to humbly apologize to everyone. I have no right to say anything to anyone in here (or anywhere els...
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kitty
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4
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507
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Children of alcoholics
(Preview)
It is hard to have a parent how has a problem with alcohol.
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princess433
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4
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424
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Both sides of the Fence - Aug 11
(Preview)
I was replying to Apple and realized that I had to share this with ALL.
From the Alcoholics side..........
There was no way on earth that I was going to admit that I was an ALCOHOLIC. The word itself was horrific, demoralizing and just plan nasty.. I wasn't...
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kathy570
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5
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451
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For Kerry Sorry
(Preview)
HI Kerry
SO SORRY i *poofed on you * had a lil kitty emergency that pulled me away from screen before i could write it down .... I am behind you .. good work
Love in recovery
Fiona
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fiona123
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1
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387
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Help for the Children
(Preview)
Last night at the meeting we were talking about boundries and I brought up the subject about setting boundries for our children because they are too young to set them for themselves.
My children are 8 and 5, so I feel like they are still too young to stand up for themselves. so I n...
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browneyes
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6
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544
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haxi-gonian IV
(Preview)
[[ room ]]
I am in Portland, and in one piece. I'm okay so don't worry.
I know I need to sell my car and work on shelter and transit issues. Tomorrow I pick up my mail and the real work begins. I have had a real adventure that i could write volumes on. I can't thank the room as a whole enough for th...
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haximon
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12
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482
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When is enuf, enuf? Please post!
(Preview)
This has been a week-- or more.
My 'A' is pic-pic-nit-pic constantly-- sometimes I feel like he sees me as more of a child than an adult. That's okay-- maybe you can laugh when you read the latter part of this post....
Last Friday we went out with several other friends. The 'A' of course was oblit...
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Apple Pie
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8
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620
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Angry
(Preview)
Today I am finding myself angry...Yesturday I was angry as well....I have been haveing trouble sleeping and when I get up in the a.m. I find myself angry...not a good way to start your day....
I shared a couple of weeks ago that My brother has picked up again and has been drinking for awhile now...I was...
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wmed
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3
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450
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cdb and dad
(Preview)
Talked to cdb tonight. Her Dad is better, he was having problems with pacemaker. With some med adjustments he is doing much better. CDB and her Mom even went out Loveseat shopping today. She will probably be gone through the weekend.
josey
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jrtjosey
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0
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380
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Mourning?
(Preview)
I had been reading alot of the prior posts about crying and getting it out-- and I guess for me, I'm crying for all the things I think I've lost (besides my mind)... I keep thinking about what it was like when we first met and how we laughed, and dreamed and life seemed limitless. I'm just crushed at the thou...
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Apple Pie
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6
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440
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Part 2 -I DRANK FOR...from Both Sides of the Fence - Aug 11
(Preview)
I drank
I drank for Happiness and became unhappy
I drank for Joy and became miserable
I drank for Sociability and became argurmentative
I drank for Sophistication and became obnoxious
I drank for Frienship and made enimies
I drank for Sleep and awakened without rest
...
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kathy570
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3
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445
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The Rat Takes a Therapist
(Preview)
8/8/2005
AM: Today started out running – like all systems go. When there’s lots to do, I do better.
p.m.: The afternoon session with the therapist left much to be desired. Andrew & I had been given “homework” assignments. This consisted of a relationship workshe...
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dove
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4
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617
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Sadness
(Preview)
Hi everyone.
Today I am sad and feel lonely, I want to cry to get out the tears but they wont come.
Several weeks ago, my A relasped and he is now backing away from me to focus on himself, he put himself back into recovery the day after his relaspe, attending 2 mtgs a day, dail...
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beachbaby
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3
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397
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Who made me upset?
(Preview)
I could blame other people. (Wrong)
I know it is my emotion and how I react is why I get upset. (and upset is covering fear)
I choose to be with people who's behavior is not acceptable to me. (I own this one)
I have to choose not to be near those people. ( I need to own this one)
I am slowly learni...
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tullemars
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4
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442
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The Upside of Anger
(Preview)
A movie recommendation...if you haven't seen "The Upside of Anger" and are up for a good movie, this is with Joan Allen and Kevin Costner. Powerful, funny, thoughtful, wise. Best movie I've seen in some time.
Here are the last words by the youngest daughter in this movie:
"Anger and...
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hurtinginindy
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1
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406
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Problems & Solutions
(Preview)
I am reading "Traveling Mercies...Some Thoughts on Faith" by Ann Lamott. Last night I ran across this and thought I would share...
"Stop living in the problem and move into the solution."
Good advice I think...it may be my new mantra.
BTW the author of this book went through a pretty wild...
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hurtinginindy
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0
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357
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My words come back
(Preview)
I noticed sometimes when I reply to a post I think hard and long before submitting it. Funny how my own words sometimes help with healing. I know I have to work hard sometimes at my program, sometimes harder then others. It's nice to know that self talk is so important and after years...
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marmare
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3
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402
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Question about crying.....
(Preview)
i don't cry much anymore. Part of the symptoms, I get numb with or w/o drugs, booze, etc.
I have been noticing lately, that I really don't cry a lot. Sometimes, wish I did.....lol
Anyway, when I do cry--it can be because I'm happy or sad........when i'm happy & I cry, i can usually s...
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catherine
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6
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510
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resentments and kids, cont.
(Preview)
Wow,
Thanks everyone for your responses that is why I come here to know I am not alone or crazy.
Lildee a special message to you, I understand so much about building resentments towards my daughter, my son and I get along great, although he is...
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holly123
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1
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383
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resentments and my kids
(Preview)
Hi everyone,
I have gone through and so many of the posts and so many relate to how I am feeling or things going on in my life. My lastest crisis is my kids emotions. It is so hard not to carry resentments straight through to them, especially my daughter w...
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holly123
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10
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618
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Dori where are you????
(Preview)
did you get the envelope i sent you? how are you and the kids doing?
Please post me private or whatever.
love,debilyn
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debilyn
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2
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417
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i am a new member
(Preview)
I feel the need to talk to others and have thought of al-anon before. I'm very happy to have found this sight and hope it will help. My husband is a alcoholic and now knows he has a problem but trying to fix it by himself. He was badly hurt at work 3 months ago and is still under doctors care but his drinking has...
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jspooh
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4
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597
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I am feeling down
(Preview)
I left my husband Thursday night and I haven't heard a word from him. I am trying to be strong and demand respect but I have let self-doubt rear it's ugly head. I took a stand and said that I didn't have to live like this anymore, that I deserved more. Now I need to be strong. If I le...
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JulieLynn
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6
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516
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PEE'D OFF
(Preview)
SORRY FOLKS REALLY NEED TO VENT.
MY EX-A STILL DRIVING ME MAD. HE HAD BEEN REALLY NICE LAST FEW DAYS, THINK BECAUSE HE HAD A FRIEND STAYING WITH HIM AND WANTED TO SHOW HIM AND HIS FRIENDS THAT WE WERE ALL A FAMILY AND FULLY SUPPORTING HIM. HE IS GOING TO AMSTERDAM FOR THIS WEEKEND TO SPEAK ON...
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melanieL
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1
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415
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Hi Everyone...new here.
(Preview)
Hi Everyone!
My name is Jenny. I just found this site, and not a minute too soon. I'm having a really rough time lately. It's hard for me to go to meetings in my area because a lot of my qualifier's (my husband's) friends go to the Alanon meetings around here, and I don't feel c...
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JennyLynn
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4
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637
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wisdom in here
(Preview)
I've been in chat a lot lately & I try to read something on the boards everyday, I don't get to them all.
But I have to say, the strength & wisdom I have gained in this painful month has been profound. Now, I want to give the same phrases back...
Grief is a part of letting go.
Al...
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kitty
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3
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516
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List to Live By
(Preview)
Everyone needs this list to live by!!!
habit....................................................
Joy....................................................................
The greatest loss..............
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Peggy7
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1
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433
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Illinois State Alanon Convention
(Preview)
Anyone in the midwest, this is near Chicago in Bloomingdale, IL.
2005 IL State Alanon Convention, Oct 7th -9th, 2005 with AA participation. Contact: kayakillinois@yahoo.com or go to: www.niafg.org and click on Events. Costs:
Alanon $...
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wallsal55
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0
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665
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What Do You Do With The VOID?
(Preview)
Somedays are pretty neat, but then some days are just pretty empty. Some of my days have purpose enough for me. Some days I wander. I know I am waiting patiently for my HP to fill the void. Patience. Patience. :y...
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wallsal55
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8
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560
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Don't Leave Me All By Myself
(Preview)
Hi all,
I am getting my youngest son ready to leave for college. He keeps playing a Moby produced song over and over again called In My World that starts out "Lordie, don't leave me all by myself". How fitting for me. My A husband has been gone all summer golfing, finding himself, and "getting away from...
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nmike
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4
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442
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Touchy Subject regarding KIds
(Preview)
Ok I have a question, I am asking this for some tools, and I really need some help.
For those of you who have/ had children: What do you tell them when their parent (the "A") doesn't come home because the "A" is out drinking/using? And what do you tell them when the "A" finally does come home and is d...
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Dolphin123
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7
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449
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Snoring
(Preview)
My A is behind me snoring after being out until three in the morning. I she just finished days of very hard work and her birthday is this week...funny but I came up with a saying last night when I was laying in bed waiting for her..."reason # 365." Meaning A's will find 365 good r...
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Stephanie
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2
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386
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hi everyone
(Preview)
Hi I know that it has been quite a while since I have posted and I just want to check in. I have been keeping bussy this summer doing things with the kids. I am doing good and have really noticed the progress of my program and keeping bussy helps alot to keep the focus on me. This summer ha...
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jj
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3
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413
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Get my gun and start the barbecue
(Preview)
After about dieing going and getting feed in this hot, sticky, icky,
horrible, bright, sunshine... and getting groceries. OH no could not go
early when it is cool. Have to put it off.
After all this, I drive home, get out and see FeeFee is in distress. She is
my tame white turkey, I am chasin...
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debilyn
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10
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651
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Sooooo Tired
(Preview)
Just coming off a short period of sobriety with my A...he's back to drinking.
soooooooo tired...
...can't stand to hear one more time..."I'll get better"...empty words
Opened the credit card bill today...he spent over $1000 on booze and cigarettes last month
I went for a job interview tod...
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hurtinginindy
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2
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381
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Help, I think I am going CRAZY
(Preview)
I am writing this to seek opinions/advise or just validations of my emotions.
My husband is an "A" . He grew up in an enviroment where both parents were alcoholics. His grandparents were alcoholics and family drank at every occasion.
We have been married for almost 19 years and I can ho...
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Tammy
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6
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484
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The power of LOVE
(Preview)
You need it. I need it.They need it. Whoever THEY are. Love brings us to it like a moth to a flame. So, I've been hurt. You've been hurt. They've been hurt. Do not be mean. Don't treat someone in a way you wouldn't want to be treated. Come on now really, would...
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hvnly1
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3
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603
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haxi-gonian III
(Preview)
[[ room ]]
Ogden, Utah (1030 mountain, 1230 eastern)
It seems I needed the room-night worse than I thought. I found a room near the meeting place to make life easier. The meeting itself was quite large, around 30 people and the topic was courage (apropos, dontcha think?). Good to see so many in...
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haximon
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5
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428
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Bad Therapist - (mommy I love u)
(Preview)
My mother & step-father made it to their second session with this "family therapist". I am so disturbed about the behaviour of this woman doctor, I am actually horrified. She is jumping to judgement, feeding the A answers, telling my mother she is unreasonable, because she is setting bou...
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kitty
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2
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488
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Moving forward
(Preview)
Moving forward was one of the topics of last nights online meeting.
I am working very hard on moving forward.
This is after 3 1/2 years of stagnation and hoping things would change.
Waiting around for things to change.
Wishing that my life was different.
But last July I found ala...
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megan
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10
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493
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persception of reality and behavior
(Preview)
I have to share with you all the messed up perspective that my A exhibited last night and you will all understand and maybe get a chuckle. He wanted to use the phone. So in that ever so polite way, I'm sure some of you will understand the abusive nature of the demon, says, Bleepity, ble...
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Sallen
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3
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497
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Repeating an Oldie - Comes A Dawn
(Preview)
Comes A Dawn After awhile you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul. And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning, And company doesn't mean security, And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts, And presents aren't promises, And you begin to accept your defea...
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kismetstrand
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1
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365
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expectations
(Preview)
Has someone ever said something to you that took a long time for you to fully understand? This recently happened to me, it was an epiphany.As many of you know my 1st husband died 4 1/2 years ago of an alcohol induced condition. He died sober and happy. At some point he had said to me "I'm
&nb...
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swolves
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4
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490
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Resentment/Forgiveness
(Preview)
“Resentment will do nothing except tear us apart inside. No one ever found serenity through hatred. No one ever truly recovered from the effects of alcoholism by harboring anger or fear or by holding onto grudges….Forgiveness is no favor. We do it for no one but ourselves….Alth...
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kismetstrand
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0
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562
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Humility
(Preview)
From Courage to Change, Feb. 2, pg. 33. "Today, being humble means climbing down from the ladder of judgement of myself and others, and taking my rightful place in a worldwide circle of love and support." May 21, pg 142. "Humility is said to be perpetual quietness of the heart. It means that I do m...
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kismetstrand
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0
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421
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From AFG Headquarters - (fyi)
(Preview)
Dear Al-Anon/Alateen Members, At our World Service Office we have experienced an increase in expenses as we have increased our services to the fellowship: Half-price Forum subscriptions offer for groups Increased US and Canadian Public Outreach Activities Free public out...
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kismetstrand
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0
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342
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I got a question about meetings...
(Preview)
I found meetings in my area finally but the page I printed out has "beginner meetings and regular meetings" do I go to a beginner meeting. I am new to this and I am not sure of the protocal. If anyone knows what I have to do or bring please let me know. Thank you
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kimmie
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2
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360
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What I have learned (top Twenty)
(Preview)
1. It is not my fault.
2. I can't cure it.
3. I can leave it.
4. Our kids are most important.
5. I deserve alot.
6. I deserve to be loved and to love.
7. I know the county sheriff's phone number.
...
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tullemars
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7
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445
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happy news! (c:
(Preview)
thanks to your prayers and thoughts and even just reading my post,
my daughter is keeping her little one!!!
She went to the clinic to get the meds to abort. They did an ultra sound first. She
said there was no way she could do it after that.
Said it was tiny and kicking around. Could see his/he...
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debilyn
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8
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482
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Quick Question Anyone
(Preview)
How do you get the pictures in your profile?
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Sallen
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4
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434
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My Attitude
(Preview)
Today, I promise myself:
To be so strong that nothing can disturb my peace of mind.
To talk health, happiness, and prosperity to every person I meet.
To make all my friends feel that there is something special in them.
To look at the sunny side of everything and make my optimism come tr...
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Peggy7
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1
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422
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haxi-gonian II
(Preview)
[[[ room ]]]
Second update: Rock Springs, Wyoming (1030 mountain, 1230 eastern)
As most of you know, Peggy7 opened up her house in Lincoln, Nebraska to me and my gratitude knows no bounds. It was so nice to sit and talk with no time pressures! Having a big red surrogate dog for a...
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haximon
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16
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2216
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1 year
(Preview)
I have reach a year today being married. The day we got married was a wonderful day. It was sunny we got married outside. Today it is cloudy and I am working. We are going to be celbrating by going to diner.
Also this month he has reach 6 months being sober. We also have known each other for 6 years.
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nycbt
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8
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439
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STEP 2
(Preview)
I met this wonderful AA speaker friend of my ex-A called Mickey Bush who explained step 2 to me in very simple terms. It all makes sense to me now. So I will explain how i interpreted him explaining to me lol.
He started off by asking me how I felt after a face2face meeting. I said I f...
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melanieL
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0
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459
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