|
|
Fears for the weekend
(Preview)
My A. comes home tomorrow night after working out of town. I'm not afraid of him drinking (if he does, he does)...here's what I am afraid of.
It took so much courage inside of me to go thru what I have the past week. To put my foot down and take care of myself. One of the reasons I left this past weekend aft...
|
sg
|
3
|
748
|
|
|
|
|
I meant-Is HE cheating, not Is She.
(Preview)
sorry, my previous email was whether or not my A(husband) is cheating but i accidentally typed "She".
|
Cobrien1976
|
0
|
820
|
|
|
|
|
Women are Like Apples
(Preview)
Hello all,
I received another funny at work today and wanted to share it with ya, it is cute! But not always true:
Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they jus...
|
Dolphin123
|
5
|
1027
|
|
|
|
|
My story
(Preview)
When i first met my husband 8 years ago I thought "wow he's a really fun guy". We partied together and had a really fun time. 2 years later we moved into a house together and within 6 months we were married. I got pregnant right away and that was when my eyes were opened. That was when i realized - he can't stop...
|
tired
|
4
|
1090
|
|
|
|
|
My "A" is insane
(Preview)
Hello Roomies-Hugs to all,
OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY GOSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
My "A" is nuts! 
I posted a yesterday that he did not come home the night before, same old story ran into someone who had some meth. (Duh! when your co-workers wife is a dope c...
|
Dolphin123
|
3
|
1517
|
|
|
|
|
Kids amaze me sometimes
(Preview)
Well, we went to the Seahawks game Monday night. All in all we had a great time. There are some things my A does that just irritate me but I have to tell myself to...to let go.
We got home from the game, he arrived home about 15 minutes before me, I pulled up in the drive way and can hear him scre...
|
marmare
|
3
|
998
|
|
|
|
|
" Both Sides of the Fence " Aug. 25
(Preview)
Hello (((((All)))))
Since I haven't posted for abit and there are many new members (((((Welcome, you're in a great place ))))), I thought that I should give a brief introduction of myself.
I am a recovering Alcoholic since Oct. 15, 2001 and my husband is a very active Alcoholic, and I found...
|
kathy570
|
2
|
1356
|
|
|
|
|
I must be an awful person..
(Preview)
We took our kids to the doctor this morning, and my a stepped on one of the scales. He weighed 20lbs more at the doctor than he did at work. He got so depressed over it. I mean we're both over weight. I've been a symptomatic over eater since I was a child. We have not been act...
|
twinmom2
|
2
|
1058
|
|
|
|
|
Trust & relationships
(Preview)
As I've been reading my realtionship books I have been thinking about what role trust plays in this whole deal. One of the books I've been reading is called "His Needs, Her Needs" and is about how men and women each have a set of basic needs that has to be met by their partner in order to have a satisfying, fu...
|
Strong4myboys
|
5
|
2142
|
|
|
|
|
perspectives and step 8
(Preview)
Hope for Today - August 25 I grew up in an alcoholic home where I felt no one was caring for me, so I decided I had to do so myself. Soon my vision became shortsighted. It took all my energy just to protect myself or figure out the bare necessities I needed to survive...
|
rosie light shines
|
0
|
903
|
|
|
|
|
Going back?
(Preview)
Wow, it's been a while since I posted. Some of you may remember my loooong post from a couple of months ago concerning leaving my husband who drank and smoked marijuana excessively. Well, I did it. I left with the boys and I've been gone now for almost 2 months. We have been through hell and back but luckil...
|
Strong4myboys
|
6
|
1151
|
|
|
|
|
gratitude for friends
(Preview)
I love people. Always have, always will. Even though I do keep to myself at times, I am a people person. I selectively chose to have as close friends in my life and they mean the world to me. Now I realize just how important having selective people in my life means.
Lately I have begun to realize just ho...
|
sg
|
2
|
1037
|
|
|
|
|
I am so annoyed...
(Preview)
Lately, even talking to a drunk person is real annoying to me. Do they know how stupid they look and sound? And do they realize that when they are talking to someone, the person listening is probably so preoccupied with how drunk they are that they arent even listening. My dad calls...
|
kimmie
|
5
|
1125
|
|
|
|
|
venting out the pain
(Preview)
i have learned something about my experience. When i learned to detach it took many'
times for me to get it. same with really knowing it is a disease.
It was one thing knowing but it took practice and really using the skills to get it into
my heart and it becam part of me.
now i am learning not to...
|
debilyn
|
6
|
809
|
|
|
|
|
Tough nite
(Preview)
I went to visit my brother and his wife.
I brought dinner (gourmet Italian from their favorite restaurant). I had also brought local corn from the farmer by my new place.
I went to my sister-in laws mothers condo.
My brother was there, upstairs with his MIL.
She is dying, has...
|
megan
|
10
|
1106
|
|
|
|
|
My "A" didn't come home last night
(Preview)
----------- Last night we made plane to go out after work. We were going to go out to eat, his choice, and just have a family night. He called me from the road and said 30 minutes, and told me he ahd to drop the work van off and then he had a ride home. I didn't like the sound of that, because the guy...
|
Dolphin123
|
5
|
1391
|
|
|
|
|
HEY..i wanted to share my breakthrough with you
(Preview)
Hope for Today - August 24 Holding on to anger, resentment, and a "poor me" attitude is not an option for me today. Growing up with two alcoholic parents created many painful memories. However, until I was able to let go of my past by forgiving my parents, I was u...
|
rosie light shines
|
2
|
965
|
|
|
|
|
where are you
(Preview)
A couple of Tuesday ago my husband told me he was going to the bank and he didn't come back until 6:00 am. I was so upset I was up all night. I called and text message him to come home. He didn't answer the phone. I was so upset. I had no idea where he was. When I saw him I was happy to see him but very angry as well. I w...
|
nycbt
|
1
|
1008
|
|
|
|
|
a check list for good/ bad in a mate
(Preview)
FATAL FLAWS IN A MATE 1. Neglecting self, including poor hygiene, not getting haircuts, not going to the doctor or dentist, etc.. 2. Don't like or love themselves. 3. Control freaks (picks out your clothes and makeup, orders for you in a restaurant, tells yo...
|
rosie light shines
|
6
|
1362
|
|
|
|
|
quit fighting it
(Preview)
They teach me that many of my punishments are self-inflicted. In some way unfathomable to my human intelligence, my suffering could be the consequence of my own attitudes, actions or neglects. #######ROSIE....oh i totally agree with this...i am listening to casette tapes i made for myself...
|
rosie light shines
|
0
|
948
|
|
|
|
|
Need to stay focused
(Preview)
My husband is an alcoholic and crack addict, clean and sober for two years and 5 months. Lately he has been acting wierd - very quiet, distant, etc. He's away from home just now, taking a course for two weeks, and when he phones he just sounds so depressed and dead.
I'm suspecting that he may be using aga...
|
lin0606
|
2
|
956
|
|
|
|
|
Monday
(Preview)
Wanted to touch base here, still have not read the postings but will do that today or tomorrow. As I work my program I find that I have more time for me and what I want! The only regret I have is that I didn't find Alanon 15 years ago. LOL We had a pretty uneventful or not much of alcohol rel...
|
marmare
|
2
|
1031
|
|
|
|
|
his family doesn't get it
(Preview)
I think I'm writing more to vent than anything. Perhaps some insight from the group would be helpful. I'm having a hard time getting past my in laws. My husband is the A. I go to Al Anon regularly and he is currently in a 12 week health care professionals rehab. program. He seems to be getting it and i feel li...
|
jmot
|
2
|
1145
|
|
|
|
|
how do i know i am progressing
(Preview)
FREQUENCY-----INTENSITY-------- DURATION---------AWARENESS
how often to i go back in the mud??/ old crap??? old behaviours??? patterns??????
this is my barometer as to "how i am progressing"
FREQUENCY....for me, i notice that i "sli...
|
rosie light shines
|
3
|
1034
|
|
|
|
|
letting it ALL hang out
(Preview)
my take on this "getting it ALL out take"
Getting It All Out
Let yourself have a good gripe session. From: " Woman, Sex, and Addiction" -- Charlotte Davis Kasl, Ph.D.
Get it out. Go ahead. Get it all out. Once we begin recovery, we may feel like it's not okay t...
|
rosie light shines
|
3
|
728
|
|
|
|
|
Dealing w/anger
(Preview)
I'm dealing w/a lot of anger the past few days-which has surpised me. I've worked the Program for so long, lived w/active alcoholism w/out anger. I have taken care, I thought, of myself the best way I could...and now that my A. wants to sober up I find myself angry. It is like this dam has been open and I am a...
|
sg
|
3
|
941
|
|
|
|
|
making life decisions with an A
(Preview)
Hi Everyone,
I am new to this. So far I just get on here and read the posts and cry. I am realizing how bad I need to talk to others who really understand me. Some of my friends are so great, but they just don't get it. They don't understand what I am really facing ea...
|
imsailing
|
9
|
1099
|
|
|
|
|
EGO and Pride
(Preview)
EGO = (Edging God Out) Taking credit for something you haven't earned.
Pride = Taking credit for something you have earned.
I know pride can be a double edged sword.
But, I am proud Today of the way I have reacted and not reacted to the Alcoholic behaviors.
We need praise when we overcome the urg...
|
tullemars
|
1
|
801
|
|
|
|
|
His family called again... sigh
(Preview)
They want to know how their brother is.
I am honest. For what that's worth. I say I had dinner with him Wednesday and he looks terrible.
He is yellow and his eyes look bad. He drinks 24/7 and is in bad shape.
And I let them know that I am seeking a divorce, legal protection from what he might...
|
megan
|
7
|
781
|
|
|
|
|
my baby
(Preview)
Hi roomies,
I just wanted to ask for some prayers for my baby boy. I woke up last night at 2am to find him having trouble breathing. Went to hosptial and he is going to be their a few days till they find out whats going on. Have to leave the older kids with my A. Lets hope he does th...
|
nikkilou
|
8
|
744
|
|
|
|
|
update on baby
(Preview)
thanks everyone for all your prayers. This was one of the hardest day of my life. My baby is breathing fine at this time. no tubes. Just meds to keep his airways open. It came out of the blue. One minute we were at the pool having dinner going to bed than this. I have to tell...
|
nikkilou
|
2
|
871
|
|
|
|
|
haxigonian XI
(Preview)
[[ room ]]
Very bad news today...had housing meeting...six months wait at minimum!
Also, expected funds have not come soooo will have to find place to park and sleep. I don't really want to make Gee Creek rest area to Portland commute daily (costs too much in gas and time). I may have to s...
|
haximon
|
3
|
864
|
|
|
|
|
Handling Anger
(Preview)
Anger is a normal emotion and all of us feel angry every now and then. If
you use it well, anger can be the fuel that drives effective and useful
action. But if you use it badly, it can result in needless pain, destruction
and frustration.
How you express your anger is especially important if y...
|
Peggy7
|
3
|
1033
|
|
|
|
|
Need help dealing with jealosy
(Preview)
I’m heading to court today to get my divorce. When I got sober 2 years ago, I thought that the worst was over and of course my marriage would improve and it would never come to this. I really wanted to work things out with my wife, but always placed my sobriety first.
I have so many mixed feelings when I r...
|
UncleLou
|
12
|
1320
|
|
|
|
|
Lost in confusion...
(Preview)
I realize that the Alanon program is about progress not perfection. Working the steps is a process that can take years. i don't have a sponser right now, I have not gained the courage to ask someone to sponser me, probably because I do not go to FF meetings regularly. Something alwa...
|
twinmom2
|
5
|
1136
|
|
|
|
|
Quote for Today
(Preview)
" Genious is eternal patience."--Michaelangelo
[Well, for me, that Genious is my Higher Power  , and I am not Him/Her!] ROFL 
|
wallsal55
|
1
|
870
|
|
|
|
|
hi megan
(Preview)
(c: Well as usual I did not make myself clear.
Hax had posted his case worker had said he needed m.o.s to stores for gas etc.
Well i have no idea where he needs to go. i did not want to put his name on the
m.o. becuz if you do not have a bank account they are impossible to cash.
if you do find someon...
|
debilyn
|
1
|
945
|
|
|
|
|
Helping others, hax address again
(Preview)
Hi, I know some of you already know but I got info on a prepaid
credit card.
At my bank, Key, I pay $3.95 and pay the amount at the bank I
want to be credited on it.
I could not figure out how to do a money order if I did not know
where he shops etc.
This is so cool and simple.
Mike Rafe
111...
|
debilyn
|
2
|
927
|
|
|
|
|
The person versus the disease.
(Preview)
I was thinking earlier today about the disease of alcoholism and the people that are affected by it. Not just the alcoholics themselves, but the family and the friends of the alcoholics. The alcoholic's transformation as they succumb to the disease reflects the transformatio...
|
bob6502
|
3
|
819
|
|
|
|
|
disappearing
(Preview)
I may be disappearing for a few days, my laptop is dieing as I type, so if you don't see me don't worry. I might breajk down and actually sit at the pc if I get disperate, or steal my kids laptops when they are not looking. - josey
|
jrtjosey
|
3
|
847
|
|
|
|
|
scared to start
(Preview)
Hi,
I am new to this. and scared to start. I guess i realize that I have a tremendous amount of work in front of me and the task is overwhelming. I have been coming to this site a lot lately, reading the posts, listnening, chatting etc. It brings me a bit of peace in the midst of the chaos. I suppose up unti...
|
confused
|
6
|
986
|
|
|
|
|
surrender
(Preview)
I'm thinking really hard about 'letting go and letting god' and detachment and surrender today. I've only been going to meetings for about a week--both CoDA and Al-anon (one or the other almost everyday). I hear that I just need to keep coming and these concepts will sink in to my c...
|
eileen
|
5
|
1322
|
|
|
|
|
the program--my "life 101"
(Preview)
my take on this "hope for today" message....how to learn life
Hope for Today - August 22 When I came to Al-Anon, I was waiting for instruction on something I badly needed. I wanted to know how to become an adult with sound values, self-respect, and s...
|
rosie light shines
|
0
|
1085
|
|
|
|
|
A phone call from MOM
(Preview)
My mother called today. We have a very crazy relationship. She's kinda bonkers and the original reason I was refered to alateen as a kid was becasue of her. I didn't go though cause she doesn't drink much in the way of alcohol so i didn't see how I qualified. What she drinks is crazy-ahol--as in she...
|
eileen
|
4
|
1125
|
|
|
|
|
The Good Stuff
(Preview)
Hello All,
We have all been sharing songs that mean something to us. This song is by Kenny Chesney, and I still remember the first time I heard this song, I had to pull over because I was bawling. I pray everyday that my "A" will remember what the good stuff really is!
Well me and my la...
|
Dolphin123
|
3
|
974
|
|
|
|
|
WOW
(Preview)
It is all about me.
I have to be happy.
If I am thinking about my A and her problem then I am not working on what I am suppose to be working on.
Sometimes you just go backwards.
I need to focus on me and the kids.
I have let alcoholism stop my progress.
I have control of what I do and how I react.
I ow...
|
tullemars
|
2
|
1022
|
|
|
|
|
Please help....I need you guys today
(Preview)
[url=http://www.activeboard.com/forum.spark?forumID=42727&action=viewTopic&commentID=3564252&subForum...
|
sg
|
23
|
1074
|
|
|
|
|
What does it take to WALK away from an A you LOVE ??
(Preview)
I am new to Al anon and have only been part of this board for a few weeks.. I have a question that I keep asking myself..
What will it take for me to walk away from my husband an alcoholic. ?? I know, it is a question that only I can answer.. I have tried, believe me and I keep coming up empty handed.
...
|
Tammy
|
5
|
1206
|
|
|
|
|
How do we offer support when we just don't believe?
(Preview)
Today my A. told me he is going to quit drinking. His plan is no booze and AA meetings out of town. He asked me outright..."do you believe I will stop" and my honest answer out of my mouth was "no".
I've been down this road before. Few days here and there and no drinking only to have him start.
He remi...
|
sg
|
5
|
865
|
|
|
|
|
Miamama
(Preview)
Hi all,
A few years ago, ok more like 4, I met someone in chat and her nickname was "miamama". At that time my nick was "truley", lol yes like from "Chitty Chitty Bang Bang" lol. Anyway------------
I was hoping to find her, so I am hoping she&nb...
|
Dolphin123
|
0
|
848
|
|
|
|
|
I was doing so well too.....
(Preview)
As all of you know because I have been so proud of myself, that things have been going great for me lately. Even though my "A" still drinks, I have been in a suprisingly great mood and working the steps. But today I just cant seem to help but be annoyed. I guess I woke up annoyed. L...
|
kimmie
|
3
|
1061
|
|
|
|
|
Old Farmers Advice
(Preview)
Old Farmers Advice: Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong. Life ain't about how fast you run, or how high you climb, but how well you bounce. Keep skunks and bankers and lawyers at a distance. Life is simpler when you plow around the stump. A bumble bee is considerably faster tha...
|
kerry5
|
3
|
760
|
|
|
|
|
Learned in Kindergarten
(Preview)
Hi Everyone!
I was digging through my desk at work this week and came across something I had saved a few years back. It was a little one page writing done by Robert Fulgrum. As I read it again, after so many years and so many changes in my life, it had so much meaning to me now. And it jus...
|
david62
|
8
|
1130
|
|
|
|
|
DETACHMENT
(Preview)
Detachment is one of the most valuable techniques Alanon offers those of us who seek to reclaim ourselves. Simply put, detachment means to separate ourselves emotionally and spiritually from other people.
If someone we love had the flu and cancelled plans with us, most of us would underst...
|
gardengal
|
2
|
945
|
|
|
|
|
For those who are confused about choices that I've shared with lately....
(Preview)
After sharing, posts with a few of you lately in which we talked about the importance of God in our lives, I wanted to give you the lyrics to a song that is truly amazing, inspiring and basically tells it like it is-- There's only ONE truth, once we are confident with knowing that trut...
|
sanddie
|
0
|
989
|
|
|
|
|
relationships
(Preview)
my esh on beattie's "relationship" daily reminder...from the "language of letting go"
AUGUST 20 >Honesty in Relationships > >We can be honest and direct about our boundaries in relationships >and about the parameters of a particular relationship....
|
rosie light shines
|
0
|
1021
|
|
|
|
|
a real fist fight with SHAME
(Preview)
SORRY THIS IS SO LONG.......i got kinda "carried away"......
Hope for Today - August 20 Steps One, Two, and Three opened doors to profound and meaningful changes. The effects of being raised in an alcoholic family seemed as fixed in me as my eye co...
|
rosie light shines
|
3
|
783
|
|
|
|
|
earth person or child of God analogy
(Preview)
This is in response to a post that I wanted to share with everyone here.....
I completely understand your concept of patience with people who are struggling, but I would like to add perception as a child of God. Yes, we all should have compassion and love as Jesus did and ye...
|
sanddie
|
2
|
1053
|
|
|
|
|
Songs that speak to me
(Preview)
When You Come Back To Me Again by Garth Brooks
There's a ship out On the ocean At the mercy of the sea It's been tossed about Lost and broken Wandering aimlessly And God somehow You know that ship is me 'Cause there's a lighthouse In the harbor Shining faithfully Pouring its light out Across the water Fo...
|
Maria123
|
5
|
884
|
|
|
|
|
Hello I am your disease....
(Preview)
This is a pretty raw post but great reminders for us all:-
Hello I am your Disease.....
Just a little reminder so you won't forget. I Am Your Disease I Hate meetings...I Hate higher powers...I Hate anyone who has a program. To all who come in contact with me, I wish you death and I wi...
|
lildee
|
6
|
1427
|
|
