Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

To quote a song..."Oops! I did it again!" and I think I might be a bit mad at myself. Woke up to find my 15 year old had missed the bus, had not tried to wake me to take him to school, had not asked any of the other 3 "adult?" children here to drive him (they all have cars and were home), and doggone-...

Cobrien1976 · Cobrien1976

My A has been sober for 45 days now and in counseling and meetings everynight. After checking his cell phone one day(i wanted to see if he lied to me about calling a guy about some $ he was owed from a job he did). I came across womens names and numbers abd starteddoing a phone records search etc. Comes out he...

AlaMom · AlaMom

that my babies are growing up. In ten days I will bring my oldest child to college. A week after that my youngest will be starting kindergarten. As the days dwindle I ask myself what happened to the last 18 years. I remember all the things that my oldest has witnessed - the figh...

Flora123 · Flora123

Hi, sorry I can't remember you full nickname, but you know who you are LOL. The Angel with all the grandchildren, who makes wonderful "wedding cakes". Just to say, haven't caught up with you in chatroom for a little while, and wondered how you are getting on. Thinking of you, Please post b...

Kim · Kim

Hello all. It's been a while since I posted, and alot has gone on since. I left for vacation last Saturday knowing full well that my husband would get high while I was gone. I was anxiety ridden the entire week before I left, however, I went. I was going to console my best frie...

fineline · fineline

I have the acoa one.....but I want the one we read at meetings and a copy of the JUST FOR TODAY....if ya have it.... thanks.

Christy · Christy

I was browsing through an AA sites and found this writing, It is true for us too and thought I would share it with the board. THE AWAKENING -The Moment of Clarity- by Denise M. "Sonny" Carroll © A time comes in your life when you finally get it. . . when, in the midst of all your fears and insanit...

haximon · haximon

[[ room ]] a further update... I checked out Portland State University to see if I could do the professional student thing...no go for fall quarter as I made too much money in '04. It may be possible for winter; will have to see. Obtained Portland State public use internet acco...

browneyes · browneyes

I am freaking out. I just looked at our joint account and he took out more money, so in the past two weeks he has spent 620.00 on meth!!!!! What the heck, he could have paid his speeding ticket, and our son's daycare and, and, and and I am so pissed!!! I called him at work and he t...

Peggy7 · Peggy7

THE FINAL INSPECTION (dedicated to Mr.Blue's brother ) The soldier stood and faced God, Which must always come to pass. He hoped his shoes were shining, Just as brightly as his brass. "Step forward now, you soldier, How shall I deal with you? Have you always turned the othe...

TigerLilly · TigerLilly

the way that i deal with my emotions is through poetry. It seems to help me get theings in perspective as well as letting my feelings out. I was asked to post this Poem on here. It is one I wrote the night i decided i needed help. Last night... My Anger My anger Swells As I think of my Life Tim...

sg · sg

My A. comes home tomorrow night after working out of town. I'm not afraid of him drinking (if he does, he does)...here's what I am afraid of. It took so much courage inside of me to go thru what I have the past week. To put my foot down and take care of myself. One of the reasons I left this past weekend aft...

Cobrien1976 · Cobrien1976

sorry, my previous email was whether or not my A(husband) is cheating but i accidentally typed "She".

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hello all, I received another funny at work today and wanted to share it with ya, it is cute! But not always true: Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they jus...

tired · tired

When i first met my husband 8 years ago I thought "wow he's a really fun guy". We partied together and had a really fun time. 2 years later we moved into a house together and within 6 months we were married. I got pregnant right away and that was when my eyes were opened. That was when i realized - he can't stop...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hello Roomies-Hugs to all, OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY GOSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! My "A" is nuts!

I posted a yesterday that he did not come home the night before, same old story ran into someone who had some meth. (Duh! when your co-workers wife is a dope c...

marmare · marmare

Well, we went to the Seahawks game Monday night. All in all we had a great time. There are some things my A does that just irritate me but I have to tell myself to...to let go. We got home from the game, he arrived home about 15 minutes before me, I pulled up in the drive way and can hear him scre...

kathy570 · kathy570

Hello (((((All))))) Since I haven't posted for abit and there are many new members (((((Welcome, you're in a great place ))))), I thought that I should give a brief introduction of myself. I am a recovering Alcoholic since Oct. 15, 2001 and my husband is a very active Alcoholic, and I found...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

We took our kids to the doctor this morning, and my a stepped on one of the scales. He weighed 20lbs more at the doctor than he did at work. He got so depressed over it. I mean we're both over weight. I've been a symptomatic over eater since I was a child. We have not been act...

Strong4myboys · Strong4myboys

As I've been reading my realtionship books I have been thinking about what role trust plays in this whole deal. One of the books I've been reading is called "His Needs, Her Needs" and is about how men and women each have a set of basic needs that has to be met by their partner in order to have a satisfying, fu...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Hope for Today - August 25 I grew up in an alcoholic home where I felt no one was caring for me, so I decided I had to do so myself. Soon my vision became shortsighted. It took all my energy just to protect myself or figure out the bare necessities I needed to survive...

Strong4myboys · Strong4myboys

Wow, it's been a while since I posted. Some of you may remember my loooong post from a couple of months ago concerning leaving my husband who drank and smoked marijuana excessively. Well, I did it. I left with the boys and I've been gone now for almost 2 months. We have been through hell and back but luckil...

sg · sg

I love people. Always have, always will. Even though I do keep to myself at times, I am a people person. I selectively chose to have as close friends in my life and they mean the world to me. Now I realize just how important having selective people in my life means. Lately I have begun to realize just ho...

kimmie · kimmie

Lately, even talking to a drunk person is real annoying to me. Do they know how stupid they look and sound? And do they realize that when they are talking to someone, the person listening is probably so preoccupied with how drunk they are that they arent even listening. My dad calls...

debilyn · debilyn

i have learned something about my experience. When i learned to detach it took many' times for me to get it. same with really knowing it is a disease. It was one thing knowing but it took practice and really using the skills to get it into my heart and it becam part of me. now i am learning not to...

megan · megan

I went to visit my brother and his wife. I brought dinner (gourmet Italian from their favorite restaurant). I had also brought local corn from the farmer by my new place. I went to my sister-in laws mothers condo. My brother was there, upstairs with his MIL. She is dying, has...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

-----------

Last night we made plane to go out after work. We were going to go out to eat, his choice, and just have a family night. He called me from the road and said 30 minutes, and told me he ahd to drop the work van off and then he had a ride home. I didn't like the sound of that, because the guy...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Hope for Today - August 24 Holding on to anger, resentment, and a "poor me" attitude is not an option for me today. Growing up with two alcoholic parents created many painful memories. However, until I was able to let go of my past by forgiving my parents, I was u...

nycbt · nycbt

A couple of Tuesday ago my husband told me he was going to the bank and he didn't come back until 6:00 am. I was so upset I was up all night. I called and text message him to come home. He didn't answer the phone. I was so upset. I had no idea where he was. When I saw him I was happy to see him but very angry as well. I w...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

FATAL FLAWS IN A MATE 1. Neglecting self, including poor hygiene, not getting haircuts, not going to the doctor or dentist, etc.. 2. Don't like or love themselves. 3. Control freaks (picks out your clothes and makeup, orders for you in a restaurant, tells yo...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

They teach me that many of my punishments are self-inflicted. In some way unfathomable to my human intelligence, my suffering could be the consequence of my own attitudes, actions or neglects. #######ROSIE....oh i totally agree with this...i am listening to casette tapes i made for myself...

lin0606 · lin0606

My husband is an alcoholic and crack addict, clean and sober for two years and 5 months. Lately he has been acting wierd - very quiet, distant, etc. He's away from home just now, taking a course for two weeks, and when he phones he just sounds so depressed and dead. I'm suspecting that he may be using aga...

marmare · marmare

Wanted to touch base here, still have not read the postings but will do that today or tomorrow. As I work my program I find that I have more time for me and what I want! The only regret I have is that I didn't find Alanon 15 years ago. LOL We had a pretty uneventful or not much of alcohol rel...

jmot · jmot

I think I'm writing more to vent than anything. Perhaps some insight from the group would be helpful. I'm having a hard time getting past my in laws. My husband is the A. I go to Al Anon regularly and he is currently in a 12 week health care professionals rehab. program. He seems to be getting it and i feel li...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

FREQUENCY-----INTENSITY-------- DURATION---------AWARENESS how often to i go back in the mud??/ old crap??? old behaviours??? patterns?????? this is my barometer as to "how i am progressing" FREQUENCY....for me, i notice that i "sli...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

my take on this "getting it ALL out take" Getting It All Out Let yourself have a good gripe session. From: " Woman, Sex, and Addiction" -- Charlotte Davis Kasl, Ph.D. Get it out. Go ahead. Get it all out. Once we begin recovery, we may feel like it's not okay t...

sg · sg

I'm dealing w/a lot of anger the past few days-which has surpised me. I've worked the Program for so long, lived w/active alcoholism w/out anger. I have taken care, I thought, of myself the best way I could...and now that my A. wants to sober up I find myself angry. It is like this dam has been open and I am a...

imsailing · imsailing

Hi Everyone, I am new to this. So far I just get on here and read the posts and cry. I am realizing how bad I need to talk to others who really understand me. Some of my friends are so great, but they just don't get it. They don't understand what I am really facing ea...

tullemars · tullemars

EGO = (Edging God Out) Taking credit for something you haven't earned. Pride = Taking credit for something you have earned. I know pride can be a double edged sword. But, I am proud Today of the way I have reacted and not reacted to the Alcoholic behaviors. We need praise when we overcome the urg...

megan · megan

They want to know how their brother is. I am honest. For what that's worth. I say I had dinner with him Wednesday and he looks terrible. He is yellow and his eyes look bad. He drinks 24/7 and is in bad shape. And I let them know that I am seeking a divorce, legal protection from what he might...

nikkilou · nikkilou

Hi roomies, I just wanted to ask for some prayers for my baby boy. I woke up last night at 2am to find him having trouble breathing. Went to hosptial and he is going to be their a few days till they find out whats going on. Have to leave the older kids with my A. Lets hope he does th...

nikkilou · nikkilou

thanks everyone for all your prayers. This was one of the hardest day of my life. My baby is breathing fine at this time. no tubes. Just meds to keep his airways open. It came out of the blue. One minute we were at the pool having dinner going to bed than this. I have to tell...

haximon · haximon

[[ room ]] Very bad news today...had housing meeting...six months wait at minimum! Also, expected funds have not come soooo will have to find place to park and sleep. I don't really want to make Gee Creek rest area to Portland commute daily (costs too much in gas and time). I may have to s...

Peggy7 · Peggy7

Anger is a normal emotion and all of us feel angry every now and then. If you use it well, anger can be the fuel that drives effective and useful action. But if you use it badly, it can result in needless pain, destruction and frustration. How you express your anger is especially important if y...

UncleLou · UncleLou

I’m heading to court today to get my divorce. When I got sober 2 years ago, I thought that the worst was over and of course my marriage would improve and it would never come to this. I really wanted to work things out with my wife, but always placed my sobriety first. I have so many mixed feelings when I r...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

I realize that the Alanon program is about progress not perfection. Working the steps is a process that can take years. i don't have a sponser right now, I have not gained the courage to ask someone to sponser me, probably because I do not go to FF meetings regularly. Something alwa...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

" Genious is eternal patience."--Michaelangelo [Well, for me, that Genious is my Higher Power , and I am not Him/Her!] ROFL

debilyn · debilyn

(c: Well as usual I did not make myself clear. Hax had posted his case worker had said he needed m.o.s to stores for gas etc. Well i have no idea where he needs to go. i did not want to put his name on the m.o. becuz if you do not have a bank account they are impossible to cash. if you do find someon...

debilyn · debilyn

Hi, I know some of you already know but I got info on a prepaid credit card. At my bank, Key, I pay $3.95 and pay the amount at the bank I want to be credited on it. I could not figure out how to do a money order if I did not know where he shops etc. This is so cool and simple. Mike Rafe 111...

bob6502 · bob6502

I was thinking earlier today about the disease of alcoholism and the people that are affected by it. Not just the alcoholics themselves, but the family and the friends of the alcoholics. The alcoholic's transformation as they succumb to the disease reflects the transformatio...

jrtjosey · jrtjosey

I may be disappearing for a few days, my laptop is dieing as I type, so if you don't see me don't worry. I might breajk down and actually sit at the pc if I get disperate, or steal my kids laptops when they are not looking. - josey

confused · confused

Hi, I am new to this. and scared to start. I guess i realize that I have a tremendous amount of work in front of me and the task is overwhelming. I have been coming to this site a lot lately, reading the posts, listnening, chatting etc. It brings me a bit of peace in the midst of the chaos. I suppose up unti...

eileen · eileen

I'm thinking really hard about 'letting go and letting god' and detachment and surrender today. I've only been going to meetings for about a week--both CoDA and Al-anon (one or the other almost everyday). I hear that I just need to keep coming and these concepts will sink in to my c...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

my take on this "hope for today" message....how to learn life Hope for Today - August 22 When I came to Al-Anon, I was waiting for instruction on something I badly needed. I wanted to know how to become an adult with sound values, self-respect, and s...

eileen · eileen

My mother called today. We have a very crazy relationship. She's kinda bonkers and the original reason I was refered to alateen as a kid was becasue of her. I didn't go though cause she doesn't drink much in the way of alcohol so i didn't see how I qualified. What she drinks is crazy-ahol--as in she...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hello All, We have all been sharing songs that mean something to us. This song is by Kenny Chesney, and I still remember the first time I heard this song, I had to pull over because I was bawling. I pray everyday that my "A" will remember what the good stuff really is! Well me and my la...

tullemars · tullemars

It is all about me. I have to be happy. If I am thinking about my A and her problem then I am not working on what I am suppose to be working on. Sometimes you just go backwards. I need to focus on me and the kids. I have let alcoholism stop my progress. I have control of what I do and how I react. I ow...

sg · sg

[url=http://www.activeboard.com/forum.spark?forumID=42727&action=viewTopic&commentID=3564252&subForum...

Tammy · Tammy

I am new to Al anon and have only been part of this board for a few weeks.. I have a question that I keep asking myself.. What will it take for me to walk away from my husband an alcoholic. ?? I know, it is a question that only I can answer.. I have tried, believe me and I keep coming up empty handed. ...

sg · sg

Today my A. told me he is going to quit drinking. His plan is no booze and AA meetings out of town. He asked me outright..."do you believe I will stop" and my honest answer out of my mouth was "no". I've been down this road before. Few days here and there and no drinking only to have him start. He remi...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Snapping (Preview) To quote a song..."Oops! I did it again!" and I think I might be a bit mad at myself. Woke up to find my 15 year old had missed the bus, had not tried to wake me to take him to school, had not asked any of the other 3 "adult?" children here to drive him (they all have cars and were home), and doggone-...	kismetstrand	6	757	Aug 26, 2005 by Christy
	I she cheating-weird relationships with other women (Preview) My A has been sober for 45 days now and in counseling and meetings everynight. After checking his cell phone one day(i wanted to see if he lied to me about calling a guy about some $ he was owed from a job he did). I came across womens names and numbers abd starteddoing a phone records search etc. Comes out he...	Cobrien1976	4	966	Aug 26, 2005 by lin0606
	The time has come... (Preview) that my babies are growing up. In ten days I will bring my oldest child to college. A week after that my youngest will be starting kindergarten. As the days dwindle I ask myself what happened to the last 18 years. I remember all the things that my oldest has witnessed - the figh...	AlaMom	6	848	Aug 26, 2005 by AlaMom
	Message for Angel (Preview) Hi, sorry I can't remember you full nickname, but you know who you are LOL. The Angel with all the grandchildren, who makes wonderful "wedding cakes". Just to say, haven't caught up with you in chatroom for a little while, and wondered how you are getting on. Thinking of you, Please post b...	Flora123	0	458	Aug 26, 2005 by Flora123
	relapse again (Preview) Hello all. It's been a while since I posted, and alot has gone on since. I left for vacation last Saturday knowing full well that my husband would get high while I was gone. I was anxiety ridden the entire week before I left, however, I went. I was going to console my best frie...	Kim	10	885	Aug 25, 2005 by Kim
	Anyone have a copy of Alanon's Personal Bill of Rights ? (Preview) I have the acoa one.....but I want the one we read at meetings and a copy of the JUST FOR TODAY....if ya have it.... thanks.	fineline	2	675	Aug 25, 2005 by fineline
	The awakening (Preview) I was browsing through an AA sites and found this writing, It is true for us too and thought I would share it with the board. THE AWAKENING -The Moment of Clarity- by Denise M. "Sonny" Carroll © A time comes in your life when you finally get it. . . when, in the midst of all your fears and insanit...	Christy	4	936	Aug 25, 2005 by whitie
	haxigonian XIII (Preview) [[ room ]] a further update... I checked out Portland State University to see if I could do the professional student thing...no go for fall quarter as I made too much money in '04. It may be possible for winter; will have to see. Obtained Portland State public use internet acco...	haximon	1	534	Aug 25, 2005 by Faith73
	I want to scream!!!! (Preview) I am freaking out. I just looked at our joint account and he took out more money, so in the past two weeks he has spent 620.00 on meth!!!!! What the heck, he could have paid his speeding ticket, and our son's daycare and, and, and and I am so pissed!!! I called him at work and he t...	browneyes	9	912	Aug 25, 2005 by browneyes
	The Final Inspection (Preview) THE FINAL INSPECTION (dedicated to Mr.Blue's brother ) The soldier stood and faced God, Which must always come to pass. He hoped his shoes were shining, Just as brightly as his brass. "Step forward now, you soldier, How shall I deal with you? Have you always turned the othe...	Peggy7	2	718	Aug 25, 2005 by Dolphin123
	healing by poetry (Preview) the way that i deal with my emotions is through poetry. It seems to help me get theings in perspective as well as letting my feelings out. I was asked to post this Poem on here. It is one I wrote the night i decided i needed help. Last night... *My Anger* My anger Swells As I think of my Life Tim...	TigerLilly	2	701	Aug 25, 2005 by Peggy7
	Fears for the weekend (Preview) My A. comes home tomorrow night after working out of town. I'm not afraid of him drinking (if he does, he does)...here's what I am afraid of. It took so much courage inside of me to go thru what I have the past week. To put my foot down and take care of myself. One of the reasons I left this past weekend aft...	sg	3	519	Aug 25, 2005 by marmare
	I meant-Is HE cheating, not Is She. (Preview) sorry, my previous email was whether or not my A(husband) is cheating but i accidentally typed "She".	Cobrien1976	0	590	Aug 25, 2005 by Cobrien1976
	Women are Like Apples (Preview) Hello all, I received another funny at work today and wanted to share it with ya, it is cute! But not always true: Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they jus...	Dolphin123	5	792	Aug 25, 2005 by tea2
	My story (Preview) When i first met my husband 8 years ago I thought "wow he's a really fun guy". We partied together and had a really fun time. 2 years later we moved into a house together and within 6 months we were married. I got pregnant right away and that was when my eyes were opened. That was when i realized - he can't stop...	tired	4	829	Aug 25, 2005 by browneyes
	My "A" is insane (Preview) Hello Roomies-Hugs to all, OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY GOSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! My "A" is nuts! I posted a yesterday that he did not come home the night before, same old story ran into someone who had some meth. (Duh! when your co-workers wife is a dope c...	Dolphin123	3	1195	Aug 25, 2005 by browneyes
	Kids amaze me sometimes (Preview) Well, we went to the Seahawks game Monday night. All in all we had a great time. There are some things my A does that just irritate me but I have to tell myself to...to let go. We got home from the game, he arrived home about 15 minutes before me, I pulled up in the drive way and can hear him scre...	marmare	3	776	Aug 25, 2005 by browneyes
	" Both Sides of the Fence " Aug. 25 (Preview) Hello (((((All))))) Since I haven't posted for abit and there are many new members (((((Welcome, you're in a great place ))))), I thought that I should give a brief introduction of myself. I am a recovering Alcoholic since Oct. 15, 2001 and my husband is a very active Alcoholic, and I found...	kathy570	2	995	Aug 25, 2005 by Dolphin123
	I must be an awful person.. (Preview) We took our kids to the doctor this morning, and my a stepped on one of the scales. He weighed 20lbs more at the doctor than he did at work. He got so depressed over it. I mean we're both over weight. I've been a symptomatic over eater since I was a child. We have not been act...	twinmom2	2	797	Aug 25, 2005 by Dolphin123
	Trust & relationships (Preview) As I've been reading my realtionship books I have been thinking about what role trust plays in this whole deal. One of the books I've been reading is called "His Needs, Her Needs" and is about how men and women each have a set of basic needs that has to be met by their partner in order to have a satisfying, fu...	Strong4myboys	5	1646	Aug 25, 2005 by Strong4myboys
	perspectives and step 8 (Preview) Hope for Today - August 25 I grew up in an alcoholic home where I felt no one was caring for me, so I decided I had to do so myself. Soon my vision became shortsighted. It took all my energy just to protect myself or figure out the bare necessities I needed to survive...	rosie light shines	0	684	Aug 25, 2005 by rosie light shines
	Going back? (Preview) Wow, it's been a while since I posted. Some of you may remember my loooong post from a couple of months ago concerning leaving my husband who drank and smoked marijuana excessively. Well, I did it. I left with the boys and I've been gone now for almost 2 months. We have been through hell and back but luckil...	Strong4myboys	6	913	Aug 25, 2005 by Strong4myboys
	gratitude for friends (Preview) I love people. Always have, always will. Even though I do keep to myself at times, I am a people person. I selectively chose to have as close friends in my life and they mean the world to me. Now I realize just how important having selective people in my life means. Lately I have begun to realize just ho...	sg	2	802	Aug 25, 2005 by sg
	I am so annoyed... (Preview) Lately, even talking to a drunk person is real annoying to me. Do they know how stupid they look and sound? And do they realize that when they are talking to someone, the person listening is probably so preoccupied with how drunk they are that they arent even listening. My dad calls...	kimmie	5	884	Aug 25, 2005 by sg
	venting out the pain (Preview) i have learned something about my experience. When i learned to detach it took many' times for me to get it. same with really knowing it is a disease. It was one thing knowing but it took practice and really using the skills to get it into my heart and it becam part of me. now i am learning not to...	debilyn	6	563	Aug 24, 2005 by she123
	Tough nite (Preview) I went to visit my brother and his wife. I brought dinner (gourmet Italian from their favorite restaurant). I had also brought local corn from the farmer by my new place. I went to my sister-in laws mothers condo. My brother was there, upstairs with his MIL. She is dying, has...	megan	10	855	Aug 24, 2005 by Tammy
	My "A" didn't come home last night (Preview) ----------- Last night we made plane to go out after work. We were going to go out to eat, his choice, and just have a family night. He called me from the road and said 30 minutes, and told me he ahd to drop the work van off and then he had a ride home. I didn't like the sound of that, because the guy...	Dolphin123	5	855	Aug 24, 2005 by Tammy
	HEY..i wanted to share my breakthrough with you (Preview) Hope for Today - August 24 Holding on to anger, resentment, and a "poor me" attitude is not an option for me today. Growing up with two alcoholic parents created many painful memories. However, until I was able to let go of my past by forgiving my parents, I was u...	rosie light shines	2	711	Aug 24, 2005 by rosie light shines
	where are you (Preview) A couple of Tuesday ago my husband told me he was going to the bank and he didn't come back until 6:00 am. I was so upset I was up all night. I called and text message him to come home. He didn't answer the phone. I was so upset. I had no idea where he was. When I saw him I was happy to see him but very angry as well. I w...	nycbt	1	738	Aug 24, 2005 by Dolphin123
	a check list for good/ bad in a mate (Preview) FATAL FLAWS IN A MATE 1. Neglecting self, including poor hygiene, not getting haircuts, not going to the doctor or dentist, etc.. 2. Don't like or love themselves. 3. Control freaks (picks out your clothes and makeup, orders for you in a restaurant, tells yo...	rosie light shines	6	1083	Aug 24, 2005 by rosie light shines
	quit fighting it (Preview) They teach me that many of my punishments are self-inflicted. In some way unfathomable to my human intelligence, my suffering could be the consequence of my own attitudes, actions or neglects. #######ROSIE....oh i totally agree with this...i am listening to casette tapes i made for myself...	rosie light shines	0	685	Aug 24, 2005 by rosie light shines
	Need to stay focused (Preview) My husband is an alcoholic and crack addict, clean and sober for two years and 5 months. Lately he has been acting wierd - very quiet, distant, etc. He's away from home just now, taking a course for two weeks, and when he phones he just sounds so depressed and dead. I'm suspecting that he may be using aga...	lin0606	2	723	Aug 24, 2005 by sg
	Monday (Preview) Wanted to touch base here, still have not read the postings but will do that today or tomorrow. As I work my program I find that I have more time for me and what I want! The only regret I have is that I didn't find Alanon 15 years ago. LOL We had a pretty uneventful or not much of alcohol rel...	marmare	2	749	Aug 24, 2005 by sg
	his family doesn't get it (Preview) I think I'm writing more to vent than anything. Perhaps some insight from the group would be helpful. I'm having a hard time getting past my in laws. My husband is the A. I go to Al Anon regularly and he is currently in a 12 week health care professionals rehab. program. He seems to be getting it and i feel li...	jmot	2	892	Aug 23, 2005 by abbyal
	how do i know i am progressing (Preview) FREQUENCY-----INTENSITY-------- DURATION---------AWARENESS how often to i go back in the mud??/ old crap??? old behaviours??? patterns?????? this is my barometer as to "how i am progressing" FREQUENCY....for me, i notice that i "sli...	rosie light shines	3	764	Aug 23, 2005 by rosie light shines
	letting it ALL hang out (Preview) my take on this "getting it ALL out take" Getting It All Out *Let yourself have a good gripe session. From: " Woman, Sex, and Addiction" -- Charlotte Davis Kasl, Ph.D.* Get it out. Go ahead. Get it all out. Once we begin recovery, we may feel like it's not okay t...	rosie light shines	3	478	Aug 23, 2005 by jemco518
	Dealing w/anger (Preview) I'm dealing w/a lot of anger the past few days-which has surpised me. I've worked the Program for so long, lived w/active alcoholism w/out anger. I have taken care, I thought, of myself the best way I could...and now that my A. wants to sober up I find myself angry. It is like this dam has been open and I am a...	sg	3	691	Aug 23, 2005 by sg
	making life decisions with an A (Preview) Hi Everyone, I am new to this. So far I just get on here and read the posts and cry. I am realizing how bad I need to talk to others who really understand me. Some of my friends are so great, but they just don't get it. They don't understand what I am really facing ea...	imsailing	9	816	Aug 23, 2005 by imsailing
	EGO and Pride (Preview) EGO = (Edging God Out) Taking credit for something you haven't earned. Pride = Taking credit for something you have earned. I know pride can be a double edged sword. But, I am proud Today of the way I have reacted and not reacted to the Alcoholic behaviors. We need praise when we overcome the urg...	tullemars	1	545	Aug 23, 2005 by Dolphin123
	His family called again... sigh (Preview) They want to know how their brother is. I am honest. For what that's worth. I say I had dinner with him Wednesday and he looks terrible. He is yellow and his eyes look bad. He drinks 24/7 and is in bad shape. And I let them know that I am seeking a divorce, legal protection from what he might...	megan	7	538	Aug 23, 2005 by megan
	my baby (Preview) Hi roomies, I just wanted to ask for some prayers for my baby boy. I woke up last night at 2am to find him having trouble breathing. Went to hosptial and he is going to be their a few days till they find out whats going on. Have to leave the older kids with my A. Lets hope he does th...	nikkilou	8	496	Aug 23, 2005 by sandie123
	update on baby (Preview) thanks everyone for all your prayers. This was one of the hardest day of my life. My baby is breathing fine at this time. no tubes. Just meds to keep his airways open. It came out of the blue. One minute we were at the pool having dinner going to bed than this. I have to tell...	nikkilou	2	568	Aug 23, 2005 by cdb
	haxigonian XI (Preview) [[ room ]] Very bad news today...had housing meeting...six months wait at minimum! Also, expected funds have not come soooo will have to find place to park and sleep. I don't really want to make Gee Creek rest area to Portland commute daily (costs too much in gas and time). I may have to s...	haximon	3	626	Aug 23, 2005 by cdb
	Handling Anger (Preview) Anger is a normal emotion and all of us feel angry every now and then. If you use it well, anger can be the fuel that drives effective and useful action. But if you use it badly, it can result in needless pain, destruction and frustration. How you express your anger is especially important if y...	Peggy7	3	785	Aug 22, 2005 by Maria123
	Need help dealing with jealosy (Preview) I’m heading to court today to get my divorce. When I got sober 2 years ago, I thought that the worst was over and of course my marriage would improve and it would never come to this. I really wanted to work things out with my wife, but always placed my sobriety first. I have so many mixed feelings when I r...	UncleLou	12	1002	Aug 22, 2005 by Peggy7
	Lost in confusion... (Preview) I realize that the Alanon program is about progress not perfection. Working the steps is a process that can take years. i don't have a sponser right now, I have not gained the courage to ask someone to sponser me, probably because I do not go to FF meetings regularly. Something alwa...	twinmom2	5	863	Aug 22, 2005 by Jill
	Quote for Today (Preview) " Genious is eternal patience."--Michaelangelo [Well, for me, that Genious is my Higher Power , and I am not Him/Her!] ROFL	wallsal55	1	617	Aug 22, 2005 by Lanchas
	hi megan (Preview) (c: Well as usual I did not make myself clear. Hax had posted his case worker had said he needed m.o.s to stores for gas etc. Well i have no idea where he needs to go. i did not want to put his name on the m.o. becuz if you do not have a bank account they are impossible to cash. if you do find someon...	debilyn	1	707	Aug 22, 2005 by megan
	Helping others, hax address again (Preview) Hi, I know some of you already know but I got info on a prepaid credit card. At my bank, Key, I pay $3.95 and pay the amount at the bank I want to be credited on it. I could not figure out how to do a money order if I did not know where he shops etc. This is so cool and simple. Mike Rafe 111...	debilyn	2	697	Aug 22, 2005 by Christy
	The person versus the disease. (Preview) I was thinking earlier today about the disease of alcoholism and the people that are affected by it. Not just the alcoholics themselves, but the family and the friends of the alcoholics. The alcoholic's transformation as they succumb to the disease reflects the transformatio...	bob6502	3	564	Aug 22, 2005 by FoggyMac
	disappearing (Preview) I may be disappearing for a few days, my laptop is dieing as I type, so if you don't see me don't worry. I might breajk down and actually sit at the pc if I get disperate, or steal my kids laptops when they are not looking. - josey	jrtjosey	3	566	Aug 22, 2005 by megan
	scared to start (Preview) Hi, I am new to this. and scared to start. I guess i realize that I have a tremendous amount of work in front of me and the task is overwhelming. I have been coming to this site a lot lately, reading the posts, listnening, chatting etc. It brings me a bit of peace in the midst of the chaos. I suppose up unti...	confused	6	725	Aug 22, 2005 by Peggy7
	surrender (Preview) I'm thinking really hard about 'letting go and letting god' and detachment and surrender today. I've only been going to meetings for about a week--both CoDA and Al-anon (one or the other almost everyday). I hear that I just need to keep coming and these concepts will sink in to my c...	eileen	5	1002	Aug 22, 2005 by rosie light shines
	the program--my "life 101" (Preview) my take on this "hope for today" message....how to learn life Hope for Today - August 22 When I came to Al-Anon, I was waiting for instruction on something I badly needed. I wanted to know how to become an adult with sound values, self-respect, and s...	rosie light shines	0	747	Aug 22, 2005 by rosie light shines
	A phone call from MOM (Preview) My mother called today. We have a very crazy relationship. She's kinda bonkers and the original reason I was refered to alateen as a kid was becasue of her. I didn't go though cause she doesn't drink much in the way of alcohol so i didn't see how I qualified. What she drinks is crazy-ahol--as in she...	eileen	4	881	Aug 22, 2005 by kerry5
	The Good Stuff (Preview) Hello All, We have all been sharing songs that mean something to us. This song is by Kenny Chesney, and I still remember the first time I heard this song, I had to pull over because I was bawling. I pray everyday that my "A" will remember what the good stuff really is! Well me and my la...	Dolphin123	3	731	Aug 22, 2005 by Dolphin123
	WOW (Preview) It is all about me. I have to be happy. If I am thinking about my A and her problem then I am not working on what I am suppose to be working on. Sometimes you just go backwards. I need to focus on me and the kids. I have let alcoholism stop my progress. I have control of what I do and how I react. I ow...	tullemars	2	739	Aug 22, 2005 by Dolphin123
	Please help....I need you guys today (Preview) [url=http://www.activeboard.com/forum.spark?forumID=42727&action=viewTopic&commentID=3564252&subForum...	sg	23	812	Aug 22, 2005 by Barb
	What does it take to WALK away from an A you LOVE ?? (Preview) I am new to Al anon and have only been part of this board for a few weeks.. I have a question that I keep asking myself.. What will it take for me to walk away from my husband an alcoholic. ?? I know, it is a question that only I can answer.. I have tried, believe me and I keep coming up empty handed. ...	Tammy	5	933	Aug 22, 2005 by sg
	How do we offer support when we just don't believe? (Preview) Today my A. told me he is going to quit drinking. His plan is no booze and AA meetings out of town. He asked me outright..."do you believe I will stop" and my honest answer out of my mouth was "no". I've been down this road before. Few days here and there and no drinking only to have him start. He remi...	sg	5	591	Aug 22, 2005 by sg
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.