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accepting love...HEALTHY love!!!
(Preview)
Accepting Love
Many of us have worked too hard to make relationships work; sometimes those relationships didn't have a chance because the other person was unavailable or refused to participate.To compensate for the other person's unavailability, we worked too hard. We may have done all or mo...
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rosie light shines
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1
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604
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I am back to HATRED, god help me
(Preview)
Ok, so my 'rents made a truce... the A promised to disclose where & when he was going, to be discreet - she told him to do wtvr he wanted.
Last night he was still saying, promising everything, not be lying or drinking. But my mom has friends that are his associates that have already sd otherwi...
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kitty
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11
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656
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wedding anniversary/feeling low
(Preview)
Today is my anniversary. 14 years married.
It will, if all goes according to plan, be the last anniversay of my marriage in which I am married to my husband.
I feel sad, lonely and tired.
i will not call him. After the dirt throwing Sunday morning he has called several times, I don't answer and he...
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megan
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16
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1020
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was having trouble facing the fact that what I thought should be As bottom wasnt his bottom
(Preview)
and I think I just realized what I was doing - which is what got me here in the first place.
DH lost a kidney beginning of August. Doc found a large cancer lump so they removed it. DS & I went to FL shortly after Husbands operation (day before he was released - this was ok w/all). A few wks after we return...
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Barbara
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5
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804
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re my god bag the power of hp
(Preview)
hi guys it me again ,i got a phone call from the woman i am going to be watching her son she said she wouldn't need me until next month because the girl she had didnt know when she was leaving. so i said ok just let me know don't worry i will still do it. i hung up and i was so depressed . i wrote anothe...
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chrissy
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6
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458
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How does one accomplish this?? part 2
(Preview)
So the A. asks me if we can "talk". Something he hardly ever does. We go into a closed room and he asks me "You're planning on leaving, right?" My response...."One of us will be leaving". He's not happy (which I didn't expect him to be). He tells me how now is the time that...
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sg
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4
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546
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Progress for me
(Preview)
 Hello all,
Funny thing, I realized my own progress lastnight and today.
I have been having a situation with my boyfriend. He works away 21 days then is home for 7. We do not live together and have only been in a relationship for 10ms. When I met him I was scard to death of do...
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sunny1
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7
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609
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celebrating my 48th bday w/out my A husband
(Preview)
taking son away this wknd to a hotel w/indoor wavepool - will have my 1st massage while there. Learning not to wait for others to help me celebrate. Will return Sun (after I take son to my birthday lunch) and ask A to take his A friend home. That boundary I will ask for as its "my special day"
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Barbara
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8
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767
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ME
(Preview)
I am upset about what happen last night. I had to take away a car key which was the easy part part. Not giving it back is going to be a hard part. I have to stand my ground. I always give to him. This is going to be hard for me.
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nycbt
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3
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575
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Detachment?
(Preview)
I am coming to terms with my alcoholic fiance and have recently learned about detachment through local Al-Anon meetings and Al-Anon literature.
The point (in my mind) of having a spouse is to have someone in life to share experiences with, someone to love and who will love me in...
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sallyb
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15
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730
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attn diva
(Preview)
Thank you for your words about my dog, I have added another post if you could read it. Anyone else got comments about my situation, I would be intereseted to hear?
Topic....my progress
Sunny1
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sunny1
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1
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688
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what would u do?
(Preview)
Here's the latest pickle I've gotten myself into....
Last week at our marriage counselling session, I agreed to put up with my A smoking pot at his
friend's house--as long as he left it there, didn't do it elsewhere,etc. This was our "experiment".
I knew that when we left the appointment that he...
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gknee
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4
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664
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what a drug....!!
(Preview)
I know that we are here due to the desiese of A, but this came to me via a friend who's cousin is in jail right now, and the wife is slowly dying. I have researched this terrible drug to be more aware, this poem is a hard reality.
Hope you dont mind me sharing it, sorry if it offends anyone.
Sunny1:s...
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sunny1
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4
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549
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LAST NIGHT
(Preview)
Yesterday I drove home from my parents excited to see Rick. When I got home from work I patiently wanted for him to come home. Didn't call all day. We went to vote. I had no idea who to really vote for but voted. Then around 7:00 he told me that he had to starighten out the mes he made on Sunday and that he would b...
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nycbt
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4
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560
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Feeling some relief
(Preview)
Thanks to everyone who posted replies to my "Can't Shake this one off" post. It really helped to hear different perspectives. I confronted my "a" with how I was feeling. I simply told him that I could appreciate his fear about losing me because I'm overweight, but I could not toler...
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twinmom2
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4
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482
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Funny thing happened at my meeting last night
(Preview)
Hi all,
Back in the beginning of October I had to get a new Driver's License and I did that. Well in my area they give you a paper license and then mail you a plastic one about two weeks later. So I got my plastic one about mid-October and took it to work to make a copy for work for the insurance so I can drive a w...
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Dolphin123
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1
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682
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I am blessed :)
(Preview)
I am blessed with so many things and it is so wonderful when a person can feel and see these things. These things may not be easy now for me with my mom and dad's failing health but I see the blessings in it and am embracing them now. Alzheimer's is still an awful horrible disease and for me espe...
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cdb
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4
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783
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What a cool board this is....
(Preview)
And I think EVERYONE associated with it should accept a well deserved hug and pat on the back... I find it quite amazing, to see the love and caring of so many people here - reaching out to those in need, even ignoring or looking past their anger and words - and recognizing it for what it is....
The...
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canadianguy
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6
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573
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WHY SO HARD
(Preview)
I meet my husband six yrs ago and been married for about 15 months. At that time he was getting out of jail for drug problems. He was doing drugs and drinking. I went through alot of voliet times with him. We would actually physical wrestle on the group, yell scream push each other. My husband is a very verb...
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nycbt
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2
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709
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The Disease Concept
(Preview)
Dear Friends,
I was reminded recently about compassion for the alcoholic. This was something that I knew about but had not put into practice for a while. I had become angry and resentful towards the alcoholics in my life for the damage they had caused me. I was angry at the diseas...
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bob6502
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6
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626
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Tired of being a fool
(Preview)
What is wrong with me? Why do I have hopes and dreams and disappointments. I am so sick of this crap. I went out shopping with my ex the a. He had called last Saturday night asking me if I wanted to go shopping with him Monday evening, spend some time together. He called me...
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hadit
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3
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753
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i can choose what kind of me i am gonna have
(Preview)
Hope for Today - November 9
I grew up affected by someone else's drinking. I seldom knew what was good for me, yet I knew what was best for others and didn't hesitate to tell them. I didn't know what I enjoyed doing for fun, but I could tell you what activities the alcoholic enjoyed. I feared o...
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rosie light shines
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0
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746
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ok guys I need the push - tonights the night
(Preview)
Thinking of trying my 2nd Al-Anon meeting (this time around). Tonight at 730. Someone please give me the push I need - thanks
I went to 1 3wks ago but didnt return.
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Barbara
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6
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813
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a new moment/day
(Preview)
Each & every day we can change our attitudes, thoughts, actons in a split second.
In a moment we can change & we keep moving into the future of new moments where we have a choice to make a change!
(from Collective Soul, "in a moment")... "we can wake up & be laughing,...
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kitty
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2
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624
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how do you know whats the alcoholism? whats just being a man? and whats being a jerk?
(Preview)
How do you know when to blame the alcoholism? Im seeing trails in my husband that would happen in other non-alcoholics too. How do you know whats the alcoholism? whats "being a man"? and whats just being a plain ole jerk?
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Barbara
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10
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822
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great website
(Preview)
another great website is www.gettingthemsober.com
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healing today
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1
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511
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anyone ever attend those Al-Anon conventions at hotels?
(Preview)
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Barbara
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8
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3162
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I just need to think,and stop being vulnerable
(Preview)
Ok today i went to my moms house..We had a very good time,but she drank the whole time I was there.. I did not like that,but she said it was just wine. I know its not hard liquor,but she does have a problem
I want her to realize she is missing out on my entire childhood,and that I won't be a ki...
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Lauren ashley
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2
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470
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Kathy S
(Preview)
Hey Kathy, I shared about my A and you asked me how I'm doing. I'm doing ok. I really am. Everyday is a tough chore for me. It really is. But to live with an alcoholic and for him to really want to try is also a blessing. Thank you so much for being concerned. We all have problems and some days we think our proble...
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Cathy
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1
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548
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i am there my cousin sent this to me
(Preview)
http://www.unityworldhq.org/JDF/IamThere.html ;
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chrissy
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3
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468
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TODAY, i can change my stinking thinking
(Preview)
THOUGHT "There is no place in active life on which thought is negligible." -- T. S. Eliot
It is not a crime to think. It is not a sin to have a brain. To think is human.
However, so much of my past thinking was destructive and negative. The disease of addiction permeated every aspect of...
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rosie light shines
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1
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763
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Taking Care of Yourself & Consequences
(Preview)
I always put everyone in my life first. If a friend was having a difficult time, I would neglect my stuff to take care of them. This goes back to my childhood, taking care of my parent's stuff instead of mine. This is self-inflicted abuse. When I got into Alanon and started to take care of me, some of my frie...
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kissers
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3
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768
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pray for the stranger
(Preview)
I went to a meeting last night where the topic was "pray for the stranger." I got to thinking how to me very often the strangers I pray for are my own family. The people closest to me whom alcohol and drugs have twisted around and turned into people I don't know. This past weekend I sat across the table fro...
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hopefortoday
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1
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687
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that praying stuff actually working
(Preview)
As some of you know I have a new job....yeah!!!....but I also am dealing with a coworking who seems threatened by me. He has worked there for 6 years and has gotten comfy with the way things were. I on the other hand was told by the boss..."to correct any problems I saw and to basically do my job without dire...
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swolves
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0
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644
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GRATITUDE
(Preview)
I have never been more grateful for this program than I am today.This morning my mother died quietly in hosp after a long and painful year of one dissorder after another. I am grateful that she has no pain.
Considering where Al-Anon has brought me is a miracle - several yrs ago my mother a...
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abbyal
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18
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1005
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Wednesday Morning Meeting Nov 8th
(Preview)
Need replacement chair for tommorow morning> i can not make it i will switchi someones meeting if you like. Could an op please take it tommorow?
thanks
kerry
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kerry5
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0
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563
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I Am So Tired
(Preview)
I found out my husband sent flowers to another woman and gave her a CD box set. The drinking started back the same week I found this out. He claims nothing happened, but the drinking has continued. His behavior has been rude and arrogant once he has two drinks in him. He goes fr...
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meowzmusic
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5
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784
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Why are we sorry?
(Preview)
I was just reading through the posts and noticed something that got me thinking.
I noticed in replies to shares that deal with a member going through a painful situation, so many of us start our replies by saying: I'm so sorry to hear that, or..... I'm so sorry you are going throug...
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KathyS
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11
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654
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Please tell me how to let go.
(Preview)
Hi Everyone,
Well I thought I was doing pretty good on leaving my daughter alone. But today we went to Legal Aid so she can get a lawyer to find out what rights she has, Her Ex seems to have made all the rules and decisions. Then we went to the court house to file a complaint against him because he refuses to...
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sandy
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3
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594
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are some of us "recovering alcoholics"?
(Preview)
I met DH back in 1981 when we were both heavy into the partying (drinking/cocaine). When our son was born in 1992 I realized I couldnt do it anymore, stopped the cocaine and stopped drinking. I now drink occasionally (vacations/etc but after a night of drinking Im fine for a few months/etc). Seems DH ju...
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Barbara
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6
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1764
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THe last time I talked
(Preview)
I went the whole work day with out doing any of the calling. He called me. I still have not done any of the calling. Even though I am going to be seeing him I am going to see if he does the calling when he goes out. Which I am hoping he doesn't but if he does I hope he does the calling. I am working on not calling him....
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nycbt
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2
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744
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not calling II
(Preview)
The good thing is in a half hour I am going to be going to lunch so I will be doing my walking and trying not to call him. At my company it is slow so that is why i am want to call. Well I don't know if he even gets why I am not calling. I don't know. But I am trying to get him to miss me but I doubt that is happening though...
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nycbt
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6
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694
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hi my god bag is working thank you kissers
(Preview)
i wanted to thank kissers for her wonderful post!!
i got a phone call last night but i couldn't reach her .so i called her this morning and it was from a parent from my old school she needs someone to watch her 9 month old baby i was thrilled. thats just what i needed to survive ....
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chrissy
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6
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1254
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Confronting The A
(Preview)
Hi,
I would like some input/ideas on confronting my a. Mine dropped out of program around Labor Day. I think she thought she could control it and then the first stressful situation came up and she turned to drinking. I believe she thinks the re...
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cidboy
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6
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705
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NOT calling
(Preview)
Well this morning wasn't that good I have called him a couple of times. But like in my last post someone told me to write up here instead of calling so that is what I am doing. I want to call him so bad but like that person said let him miss me. So I might be doing alot of posting today. So thanks for your suggesti...
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nycbt
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5
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603
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When u don't call they call
(Preview)
Well I went since 8:10 this morning with out talking to him. He just called me he missed talking to me.I feel alitte better that I wasn't the first one to call. He said he was surpised I didn't call him.
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nycbt
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6
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830
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Dear God
(Preview)
Got this at work and wanted to share........
Dear God... I know you're watching over me And I'm feeling truly blest For no matter what I pray for You always know what's best! I have this circle of E-mail friends, Who mean a lot to me; Some days I "send" and "send," At other times, I...
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Dolphin123
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5
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667
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Thinking Out Loud (actually typing out loud) :-)
(Preview)
Hello All,
We all come here to share in our ESH, to give it, to take it.
We take what we like and leave the rest, or that is how it is all supposed to work. I know I practice that, makes my life a lot easier.
But at the same time, I want to be helpful. I pray that what I say helps the person in need and most of th...
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Dolphin123
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0
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628
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Sick to my stomach
(Preview)
Hi everyone
Hope you are all doing ok.
Sometimes I wonder what I am doing and why I put up with the things that go on around me. Does anyone ever feel that way? Is it low self-esteem, being used to abuse so much that it is comfortable for me to live that way? Well even tho I realize thi...
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browneyes
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7
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956
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CDB
(Preview)
Hello Ms. CDB,
Haven't seen you post recently, how are you doing?
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Dolphin123
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2
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626
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a new beginning
(Preview)
Hi everybody -
Its taken me 6 days to get here; but here I am . I decided that 'enough was enough' and finally took decisions in my own hands. I ultimately have the choice whether I can accept the current situation (living with an active 'a' or not) I chose the latter. I have moved my young family 15...
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Angie
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9
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680
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setting boundaries with people other then your a's in your life
(Preview)
My friend I have known him for going on 17 yrs. He wanted to marry me as long as I have known him. He has been a big part of my life. Because he has been a part of my life a long time I have a hard time setting boundaries. My husbands doesn't trust him because he thinks he will take advantage of me. On Saturday he dr...
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nycbt
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3
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793
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a sorry poem i wrote a while ago
(Preview)
Sorry
Mommy I am truly sorry
I know words cannot express the hurt I have caused you
I know I supposed to be mommy’s little angel too
I feel so bad
Now knowing you are sad
Remember this though I never meant for you to hurt like this
I wish I can just give u a kiss
I want to take it...
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Lauren ashley
|
0
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632
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My Perfect days
(Preview)
Year one in Alanon:
"Today was perfect! Haven't had one like this in ages!"
5 Years in Alanon"
"Today was a rough one, Seem to be having alot of those, got to get back on track so I can have all those good days again"
Today in Alanon (7 Years)
"Today was PERFECT! And you know, so was y...
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captcodee
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4
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532
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will someone please be my online sponsor
(Preview)
i need some one to help me. i need an online sponsor i feel as if i am losing my mind i know i can be strong sometimes ,but this is a very bad weekend for me everthing was going great and bam back to this crap again.
thanks hugs chrissy
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chrissy
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3
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688
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UncleLou
(Preview)
Hi, I am relatively new to posting on here but I have been reading the boards for awhile now. I have read about your situation and my life right is very similar to yours with the exception that my husband is the recovering A in the relationship.
My A and I have been together for over 20 years now with him be...
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Free_Bird
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3
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439
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My poem i wrote today
(Preview)
Lost in Silence
I am lost in my own world forever
Life only gets worse
I try and try, but then I curse
I am not happy in my skin
I just want to be soo thin
I have words, but am unheard
I am dying slowly of a broken heart
For I did not want this life from the start
I could have be...
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Lauren ashley
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2
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690
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last night i cried AGAIN!!!!
(Preview)
hey y'all, i just gotta share this with you guys
last night i saw this movie about a guy who had lived with this woman, she had a baby, a boy, whom the guy thought was his...well he wasn't, she had fooled aroudn on him while they were living together, an...
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rosie light shines
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1
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699
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WHY the attraction to other drinkers????
(Preview)
Hope for Today - November 8
Why am I so attracted to alcoholics? I dwelled on that question for more than five years. Then while listening to an adult child speaker at Al-Anon's First International Convention, I had an unexpected spiritual awakening. It occurred to me that my m...
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rosie light shines
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0
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466
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im soo sad...
(Preview)
SO yea..... I hate my xxxx life.....I really do.. I can't wait till im 18... 4 more months and then I am out of this controlling life... seriously i do need a life...I hate myself for being so xxxx stupid sometimes My aunt took my phone.... well my charger that damn bitch*********** she can go to hell f...
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Lauren ashley
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7
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834
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