Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

ling · ling

Hi one of the reasons my AH is in self destruct is that his son has disowned him and hasn't told him why. Nothing. SS is playing control. I want to send SS a message to say that his dad will die unless he rings him . Is it getting involved? He's very stubborn and unlikely to answer. He did not speak to him when he...

AnnieFenk321 · AnnieFenk321

Hi friends, I wanted to update. I have managed to get to a F2F meeting. It was fantastic. Made such a difference that it was in English.... and in my home culture.... whoa. I felt crazy relief. There was some catching up after the meeting - it was lovely. I am living with my mum. She is a sick woman. She is...

Jerry F · Jerry F

This one is a great one for me and always has been specially the thought for today and saying. I will be a good boy today.

Lyne · Lyne

Self expression vs. trying to control: The reading today explores the difference between voicing our own feelings, and using words to control others. The author says if he puts his opinion out, and then lets it go, he is speaking sincerely. However, if he repeats himself many times over, waiting...

Engaged2Drugs · Engaged2Drugs

Hello, all. This is my first post as I have just joined a few minutes ago. I went to one Al-Anon meeting a month or two ago, but have not been since. I thought since my fiance (the A) was doing well, I didn't need to go. I have recently discovered he is using again. This is his third relapse in four years. Since...

Bo · Bo

Do you know the difference between the two? Are they separate and distinct with you? I've long talked about acceptance, immersing yourself in it, and laying down the sword. I've said when someone hits you the ping pong ball, you put down the paddle, when the tug of war starts, you drop the rope. Step One...

Jayla · Jayla

Hello all. It's been a while. I sure notice when I slack off and stop reading these boards my life becomes unmanageable again! I still can't attend f2f meetings due to a court-ordered conflict. * Here is my question to you all and your ESH would be appreciated since I am so torn on this subject. * I have bee...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

Dear MIP family, I know that this will be a rant against my STBXRAH. I understand that I have to keep the focus on me. But something has happened that has hit me to the core. Things that happen to me suck, but with the tools, I am pretty successfully managing them. Tonight was different. I have this lovely B...

wifeofalcoholic · wifeofalcoholic

I read alot of information about a drug called Naltrexone. Claudia Christian's impressive story of recovery by taking this drug is shared on the internet. She had tried every alcohol recovery treatment and became sober and her cravings stopped after using this. It was used in opiod recovery an...

lookingup · lookingup

C2C 1-27 speaks about our tendency of making mountains out of molehills. It points out that many times we blow up over a small incident simply because we have ignored too many small annoyances and this can buildup to a huge explosion of temper . Living one day at a time focused on ourselves, not react...

Shane · Shane

Shortly after new years I had to call an ambulance for my wife. After a being at the ER for a few hours and not hearing anything we were asking questions and i found out that she had a BAC of almost .50 vice the assumed issue of BP med issues. I had to come home early because she wasn't feeling well and on my way h...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading is about Step 12. The writer suggests that reading this step - "Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps....." gave her hope for a better tomorrow when first arriving at Al-Anon. Her journey through recovery and the steps, sometimes painful and often slow, did ar...

SuziS · SuziS

Hello everyone. This is my first post - and I'm looking for some perspective. My father was an alcoholic, then moved onto prescription drugs. He's been sober now, save a small relapse, for about 16 years. Most of my childhood memories are of my dad being drunk/passed out and the associated dramas. I'm...

lookingup · lookingup

my day may look like this,or???(it's not always easy for me to plan my day,if I stick to the simple ,basics it just might go lots smoother on my crazy day. wake up 6-7 am morning routine ( put coffee on,read all dailies,serenity prayer several times,meditate and prayer,mip meeting 8 am( my time) G&...

Tude · Tude

Hi everyone.........wow nothing like the "I need a meeting" only to be met with blacklisted due to some trojan? I don't understand how to fix this.....and my Antivirus program is picking up nothing Anyone know what this is? Thank you

180 Man · 180 Man

Hi all, I am in a recovery, and am approaching the 4 month mark in AA. The last 4 months have been the most amazing I can remember, since my university days when alcohol was actually fun and not a problem. I hit rock bottom when my wife informed me that she had had enough, and intended to separate from me per...

new user in name · thepeacewithin

but its the same me. I've changed my username as an additional privacy measure as I am now firmly ensconced in a new and smaller country. I have come along way away from my programme, after having to jump back into the non-recovery world. Slipped into the typical adversarial position and it doesn't ma...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

To say that it's been a LONG 8 weeks is putting it mildly. Lots of new information .. more was totally revealed .. LOL .. I have had awesome moments of parenting and moments that I felt like I had a neon parenting fail sign up over my head .. LOL .. with both of my kids. Parenting is an extremely humbling exp...

tommyecat · tommyecat

I just wanted to pass along this Alanon bookmark which has helped me tremendously when life seemed out of control. You can pick one up in a f2f meeting or an alanon information center. The concepts on it may be hard to practice completely on any given day. I have found that if I pick one and use it for tha...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading discusses what many of us focused on prior to recovery! It was 'not us' - almost anyone or anything else...We often loved the drama of another's crisis and talked about it often. Our own lives seems trivial and our issues felt small in comparison. Most of us found it very hard to focu...

jtpickle · jtpickle

I have been listening to the phone bridge and attending meetings. One of the topics that has come up is gossip and I'd like a clarification or ESH. Since my AH began drinking again after a month of sobriety, it was clear as to how much the disease had progressed. A few people close to us knew he was an alc...

a4l · a4l

I am feeling at my wits end with a family member. I am supposed to be collecting someone from the airport right now as I have their car. Said annoying family member threw a tantrum and has taken off with the car key and no mobile phone. I am utterly powerless and the consequence will be no more assistance fr...

Jayla · Jayla

Hello all. It's been a while. I sure notice when I slack off and stop reading these boards my life becomes unmanageable again! I still can't attend f2f meetings due to a court-ordered conflict. * Here is my question to you all and your ESH would be appreciated since I am so torn on this subject. * I have bee...

AnnieFenk321 · AnnieFenk321

Hi friends, I am safely in my country of origin.... My husband is in our home country in rehab. The last week has been horrible. We packed up the whole appartment - me and my mother. My son was beside himself. It was so hard for him, every time he woke up there was less in the house and more mess. It's been ho...

gullideth · gullideth

I have finally decided to get help for myself. I know I cannot fix him or his problems now. I plan on going to my first Al-Anon meeting next week. I am on the computer a lot and decided to check out this forum for a little support and education when I cannot be in therapy or at a live meeting. My husband an...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Today's reading in Courage to Change is about having the courage to be oneself. The author shares that AlAnon is a program that does not dictate how members behave. Instead, it is a program that encourages each member to look searchingly and fearlessly at oneself, one's feelings, motives, and acti...

PeacefulLove · PeacefulLove

Hello, I am new to this forum and to Alanon. Today will be my first face-to-face meeting. I have been around the local AA Community for the past 3 years due to my relationship with my AH. My AH and I are newly married (this past April) and he told me up front on our first date that he was a very proud member of...

bud · bud

I worked my program hard since my break-up about 4 months ago and I'm finally in a good space. I thought it unnecessary but I was not reactive even when I discovered he recently unlinked me from linked-in. I was still ok when he contacted my girlfriend, a realtor, to sell his home. (found out because I fr...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for January 23 speaks about the importance of studying and practicing the Al-Anon program.The reading points out that if we want to learn a new language or gain a deeper understanding of art or science,we need to work at it every day and practice the things we are learning. The same is t...

hockeygal · hockeygal

Good morning everyone! I am new here to the chat room. I would like to know your thoughts on something. My husband is an alcoholic and we have had several relapses over our 24 years together. With his drinking comes talking to other women online. I have confronted him several times about this and he has l...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about the Alateen program and sponsorship within Alateen. I dont have any experience with Alateen so I cannot speak to this with any personal connection. The reading did remind me again about how vital my relationship with my sponsor has been in my recovery...

KT2015 · KT2015

I had some insight this past weekend and was able to share about it at my meeting which was helpful. I've noticed that my life has become unmanageable again. Ever since I worked the first step with my sponsor I have this little mental check list to see how unmanageable my life has become based on who I de...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading is about detachment. The writer discusses watching a colony of bees and feeling a bit intimidated by the buzzing and frenzied motion around the hive. She's reminded that if she didn't poke her nose into their hive, she would not get stung. If we choose to maintain a safe distance fr...

Twinkies · Twinkies

During the conversation AH and I had on Friday where he essentially asked my permission to drink, I said something to him that I think struck a chord with him. I let him go on about his drinking and what he felt my role in it was (he was trying to shift the blame to me so he could justify drinking âjust a couple...

Sorcha · Sorcha

Hi everyone I just need to post because the grief is really back with a bang the last few days. My ex partner died 12 weeks ago today. We had been finished 3 months, I had been no contact for the last two, I had changed my number as I had really reached the end of the line with it and felt no contact was the only wa...

Lyne · Lyne

Detaching with love: The writer today tells a humorous example of how she learned to detach with love. At first she felt it was a vague concept, then she detached without the love, and her F2F meeting allowed her to find detachment with love. Today's Reminder: With my Higher Power's help, I will kee...

NoMiHopeless · NoMiHopeless

New sign up here... Im trying to stay awake to keep an eye on my husband. He went out and DROVE home tonight from the bar and is in the worst condition I've ever seen him. He mumbled something about a fight, took a couple steps, fell, banged his head on the doorframe, and he is now laying on the bathroom floor...

Bethany66 · Bethany66

Hello to all my Al-Anon family at MIP! I am sorry to have been away so long, but there has been so much going on lately, and to be honest, I let my priority of taking care of myself (putting on my airplane oxygen mask first) slipped away from me for a while. But I feel like I am getting back to a more balanced p...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I'm actually doing pretty well staying out of my own head and not invading others .. LOL .. it would make me more comfortable if my X would act out because then I would know we are still operating in the same way. At this point he has either figured out that he needs a court order or not .. it's not my problem n...

lookingup · lookingup

in today's reading talks about keeping our anonymity within meetings, anonymity make it possible to leave all our surnames and labels ,expectations with which we have been burdened outside the alanon rooms, through our commitment to anonymity we can put aside what we are and begin to know who we are...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP and happy Friday. Today's reading in C2C is all about self-acceptance and healing. The writer talks about becoming more comfy in his/her own skin through self-acceptance. While the program asks us to recognize and admit our limitations, we are also asked to accept that only a hi...

Twinkies · Twinkies

Today marks 3 weeks of sobriety for my AH. Things seem to be improving between us - weâve shared a few laughs and things seems more fluid and natural between us. And weâve had a positive conversation about our finances and have a tentative plan for going forward now that he purchased the classic car for o...

ling · ling

Can anyone answer this_ how do you work out if you want to stay with your alcoholic whose wobbling on their ice skates and keeps falling over. They may never get up again -and were standing up for 12 years? A bit cryptic and hope you know what I mean. He hasn't wobbled or fallen off for 12 yrs. A non alcoholic...

Iamhere · Iamhere

I love how we share our ESH in recovery. I wanted to share how 'it' works when we work it! My oldest child, 25, is sober about 2.5 months. This is a child who, like me, showed many 'isms' before he ever consumed a mind altering substance. This is a child, like me, who found courage from the first mind-alt...

ChangingTide · ChangingTide

Years ago I attended Al Anon when my ex husband decided to go to AA. I learned a lot there; about his disease....and mine. Now, years later, my son is in his 3rd round of treatment for drug dependency/alcoholism and I realize I need to get myself healthy again. I am looking for meetings in my area that a...

LuvMySun · LuvMySun

I don't know if you all read my post about my son but he is 28- in a downward spiral. My daughter called and said he texted her and asked the name and number for the therapist she recommended to him a while back... I know he KNOWS he has a problem- but I also understand the courage it takes to ask for help. He i...

Green Eyes · Green Eyes

My AD is 30 years old and is now in deep financial trouble and homeless. Her boyfriend kicked her out this week and she texted me last month that she is over $10k in debt. The good thing is that she is alive and has a job, even though her wages are now being garnished. I made a couple of suggestions to her via te...

2HP · 2HP

A year ago, I saw Valentines Day fast approaching at a time my son was about to graduate. Now in his early 30s, I thought the time had FINALLY come for him to commit to his long-time, live-in girlfriend, who had followed him and his long academic career while making a happy home for them both. To me, it l...

hotrod · Newbie

Post InfoTOPIC: NewcomerL1983 Newbie Status: OnlinePosts: 1Date: 31m agoIP: 94.2.230.176NewcomerPermalink Reply Quote More Hi Im not too sure how this works. Im new here and to Al-anon. I have heard how much it can help people and Ive realised how desperate I am to get better. My father is an...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading discusses 'help' and what it looked like for most of us before recovery. The writer considered Al-Anon 'heartless' when she first heard that the best way to help an alcoholic was to focus on self. She had decided to not return and one statement changed her mind. She was told that the...

jtpickle · jtpickle

Hi Everyone - Are there any other ideas or suggestions you can give me of how I can mentally separate my AH from this disease? Here's the scenario that plays each night: AH comes home from work, drinks a beer that we can "see" but has already had his vodka or other alcohol of choice by now. He then goes t...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Today's reading in courage to change is about step two - a return to sanity. The author shares that if someone had been observing their actions prior to AlAnon, they would have seemed like the one who was insane. Living with an active alcoholic and trying to control alcoholic behavior resulted in all...

Twinkies · Twinkies

AH and I have been up and down the last few days. Part of it was me, part of it was him. Iâm new to this way of life too and heâs not the only one struggling with his choice to stop drinking. Iâm grateful heâs come to this point - finally, after years of praying, of hoping, of dreaming - weâve finally taken the fi...

Tude · Tude

Hi everyone. My AF who lives on our property has been going to AA a few weeks now. She has a court date over DUI coming up the 24th. When she stopped over to get her mail I asked her what the court date was (i had forgotten it) and if her sponsor was going with her to court.......no. I guess my concerns are if sh...

LuvMySun · LuvMySun

without making this too long- I am scared and worried for my adult son... his dad (my ex husband) was/is alcoholic and my son has been in a downward spiral for months now. I am remarried (since my son was 11- he is now 28) but his Dad has painted my husband as the "bad guy" and my son always craved time and atte...

MizzB · MizzB

Last night A EX-BF came round without announcement and wanted to dry out here. I asked my parents to come over because I dind't want my first weekend alone to be alone, so there was nowhere for him to sleep. He was lost and scared and breaking and I had to turn him round to send him back to his hotel. I know tha...

AnnieFenk321 · AnnieFenk321

Hi friends I just want to drop this here. I would love some help seeing this with program eyes. We are packing up our apartment. I only have a few more days before I leave. I need to get all the stuff out. That includes my AH's stuff. I still can't talk to him so I have to make judgement calls on everything - ev...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for January 16 points out that we react instantly to situations and forget to THINK and pray before we RESPOND. /It suggest that this is a personality flaw and indicates that many of our irrational reactions are automatic and if we take the time to THINK we will respond in a ore const...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

So I had a good laugh at myself over the weekend .. at the moment it looks like there will be more court. I know shocking right?? LOL. Oi. I'm going to see what he has going on I'm not the one jumping to file, I have no intension .. it plays to my favor. I know I'm horrible however after doing this for 7 year...

joker · joker

I have been working hard on my recovery. I have been doing a lot of processing and its been so hard. I had a break down yesterday. I had not had been grocery shopping for awhile as it reminds me of the alcoholic. Well, yesterday I finally faced my fear and got groceries. Well, that was a trigger big time. I go...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	getting involved to save AH (Preview) Hi one of the reasons my AH is in self destruct is that his son has disowned him and hasn't told him why. Nothing. SS is playing control. I want to send SS a message to say that his dad will die unless he rings him . Is it getting involved? He's very stubborn and unlikely to answer. He did not speak to him when he...	ling	11	718	Jan 29, 2018 by Aline
	update (Preview) Hi friends, I wanted to update. I have managed to get to a F2F meeting. It was fantastic. Made such a difference that it was in English.... and in my home culture.... whoa. I felt crazy relief. There was some catching up after the meeting - it was lovely. I am living with my mum. She is a sick woman. She is...	AnnieFenk321	6	710	Jan 29, 2018 by AnnieFenk321
	1/29 ODAT (Preview) This one is a great one for me and always has been specially the thought for today and saying. I will be a good boy today.	Jerry F	1	573	Jan 29, 2018 by hotrod
	C2C, 1/29 (Preview) Self expression vs. trying to control: The reading today explores the difference between voicing our own feelings, and using words to control others. The author says if he puts his opinion out, and then lets it go, he is speaking sincerely. However, if he repeats himself many times over, waiting...	Lyne	8	813	Jan 29, 2018 by Lyne
	First post - A's 3rd relapse (Preview) Hello, all. This is my first post as I have just joined a few minutes ago. I went to one Al-Anon meeting a month or two ago, but have not been since. I thought since my fiance (the A) was doing well, I didn't need to go. I have recently discovered he is using again. This is his third relapse in four years. Since...	Engaged2Drugs	9	590	Jan 29, 2018 by AnnieFenk321
	Acceptance and Unacceptable Behavior (Preview) Do you know the difference between the two? Are they separate and distinct with you? I've long talked about acceptance, immersing yourself in it, and laying down the sword. I've said when someone hits you the ping pong ball, you put down the paddle, when the tug of war starts, you drop the rope. Step One...	Bo	25	2964	Jan 28, 2018 by Calm Lady
	Out of My Hula Hoop? (Preview) Hello all. It's been a while. I sure notice when I slack off and stop reading these boards my life becomes unmanageable again! I still can't attend f2f meetings due to a court-ordered conflict. * Here is my question to you all and your ESH would be appreciated since I am so torn on this subject. * I have bee...	Jayla	13	811	Jan 28, 2018 by MeTwo2
	Dealing with some new anger over reality (Preview) Dear MIP family, I know that this will be a rant against my STBXRAH. I understand that I have to keep the focus on me. But something has happened that has hit me to the core. Things that happen to me suck, but with the tools, I am pretty successfully managing them. Tonight was different. I have this lovely B...	PosiesandPuppies	31	995	Jan 27, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	Recovery with Naltrexone? (Preview) I read alot of information about a drug called Naltrexone. Claudia Christian's impressive story of recovery by taking this drug is shared on the internet. She had tried every alcohol recovery treatment and became sober and her cravings stopped after using this. It was used in opiod recovery an...	wifeofalcoholic	5	678	Jan 27, 2018 by SoggySlippers
	ctc 1-27-17 (Preview) C2C 1-27 speaks about our tendency of making mountains out of molehills. It points out that many times we blow up over a small incident simply because we have ignored too many small annoyances and this can buildup to a huge explosion of temper . Living one day at a time focused on ourselves, not react...	lookingup	4	588	Jan 27, 2018 by Aline
	Made it 21 days (Preview) Shortly after new years I had to call an ambulance for my wife. After a being at the ER for a few hours and not hearing anything we were asking questions and i found out that she had a BAC of almost .50 vice the assumed issue of BP med issues. I had to come home early because she wasn't feeling well and on my way h...	Shane	4	600	Jan 27, 2018 by Tude
	Courage to Change 1/26/18 (Preview) Today's reading is about Step 12. The writer suggests that reading this step - "Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps....." gave her hope for a better tomorrow when first arriving at Al-Anon. Her journey through recovery and the steps, sometimes painful and often slow, did ar...	Iamhere	5	660	Jan 26, 2018 by Iamhere
	Right to worry, or over-reacting due to experiences? (Preview) Hello everyone. This is my first post - and I'm looking for some perspective. My father was an alcoholic, then moved onto prescription drugs. He's been sober now, save a small relapse, for about 16 years. Most of my childhood memories are of my dad being drunk/passed out and the associated dramas. I'm...	SuziS	10	770	Jan 26, 2018 by Maresie
	Planning my day (Preview) my day may look like this,or???(it's not always easy for me to plan my day,if I stick to the simple ,basics it just might go lots smoother on my crazy day. wake up 6-7 am morning routine ( put coffee on,read all dailies,serenity prayer several times,meditate and prayer,mip meeting 8 am( my time) G&...	lookingup	9	641	Jan 26, 2018 by Tude
	Blacklisted from online meeting due to trojan? (Preview) Hi everyone.........wow nothing like the "I need a meeting" only to be met with blacklisted due to some trojan? I don't understand how to fix this.....and my Antivirus program is picking up nothing Anyone know what this is? Thank you	Tude	8	663	Jan 26, 2018 by Tude
	In Recovery but Losing Marriage (Preview) Hi all, I am in a recovery, and am approaching the 4 month mark in AA. The last 4 months have been the most amazing I can remember, since my university days when alcohol was actually fun and not a problem. I hit rock bottom when my wife informed me that she had had enough, and intended to separate from me per...	180 Man	39	2478	Jan 26, 2018 by SerenityRUS
	new user in name (Preview) but its the same me. I've changed my username as an additional privacy measure as I am now firmly ensconced in a new and smaller country. I have come along way away from my programme, after having to jump back into the non-recovery world. Slipped into the typical adversarial position and it doesn't ma...	thepeacewithin	3	630	Jan 26, 2018 by Lyne
	Prayers Please .. (Preview) To say that it's been a LONG 8 weeks is putting it mildly. Lots of new information .. more was totally revealed .. LOL .. I have had awesome moments of parenting and moments that I felt like I had a neon parenting fail sign up over my head .. LOL .. with both of my kids. Parenting is an extremely humbling exp...	SerenityRUS	12	677	Jan 26, 2018 by serenity47
	Just for Today Bookmark (Preview) I just wanted to pass along this Alanon bookmark which has helped me tremendously when life seemed out of control. You can pick one up in a f2f meeting or an alanon information center. The concepts on it may be hard to practice completely on any given day. I have found that if I pick one and use it for tha...	tommyecat	11	10605	Jan 25, 2018 by Tude
	Courage to Change 1/25/18 (Preview) Today's reading discusses what many of us focused on prior to recovery! It was 'not us' - almost anyone or anything else...We often loved the drama of another's crisis and talked about it often. Our own lives seems trivial and our issues felt small in comparison. Most of us found it very hard to focu...	Iamhere	2	590	Jan 25, 2018 by Tude
	Gossip (Preview) I have been listening to the phone bridge and attending meetings. One of the topics that has come up is gossip and I'd like a clarification or ESH. Since my AH began drinking again after a month of sobriety, it was clear as to how much the disease had progressed. A few people close to us knew he was an alc...	jtpickle	13	788	Jan 25, 2018 by jtpickle
	Going insane (Preview) I am feeling at my wits end with a family member. I am supposed to be collecting someone from the airport right now as I have their car. Said annoying family member threw a tantrum and has taken off with the car key and no mobile phone. I am utterly powerless and the consequence will be no more assistance fr...	a4l	12	663	Jan 25, 2018 by Iamhere
	Out of My Hula Hoop? (Preview) Hello all. It's been a while. I sure notice when I slack off and stop reading these boards my life becomes unmanageable again! I still can't attend f2f meetings due to a court-ordered conflict. * Here is my question to you all and your ESH would be appreciated since I am so torn on this subject. * I have bee...	Jayla	5	641	Jan 25, 2018 by Jayla
	feeling homeless and alone (Preview) Hi friends, I am safely in my country of origin.... My husband is in our home country in rehab. The last week has been horrible. We packed up the whole appartment - me and my mother. My son was beside himself. It was so hard for him, every time he woke up there was less in the house and more mess. It's been ho...	AnnieFenk321	10	775	Jan 24, 2018 by Maresie
	I am new here, losing my husband to alcohol (Preview) I have finally decided to get help for myself. I know I cannot fix him or his problems now. I plan on going to my first Al-Anon meeting next week. I am on the computer a lot and decided to check out this forum for a little support and education when I cannot be in therapy or at a live meeting. My husband an...	gullideth	23	4062	Jan 24, 2018 by Tude
	Courage to Change January 24 (Preview) Today's reading in Courage to Change is about having the courage to be oneself. The author shares that AlAnon is a program that does not dictate how members behave. Instead, it is a program that encourages each member to look searchingly and fearlessly at oneself, one's feelings, motives, and acti...	Skorpi	5	932	Jan 24, 2018 by MeTwo2
	Newcomer and confused (Preview) Hello, I am new to this forum and to Alanon. Today will be my first face-to-face meeting. I have been around the local AA Community for the past 3 years due to my relationship with my AH. My AH and I are newly married (this past April) and he told me up front on our first date that he was a very proud member of...	PeacefulLove	11	861	Jan 24, 2018 by Iamhere
	Blindsided- why did I not see this coming?? (Preview) I worked my program hard since my break-up about 4 months ago and I'm finally in a good space. I thought it unnecessary but I was not reactive even when I discovered he recently unlinked me from linked-in. I was still ok when he contacted my girlfriend, a realtor, to sell his home. (found out because I fr...	bud	14	823	Jan 24, 2018 by bud
	ODAT READING 1-23-2018 (Preview) The ODAT reading for January 23 speaks about the importance of studying and practicing the Al-Anon program.The reading points out that if we want to learn a new language or gain a deeper understanding of art or science,we need to work at it every day and practice the things we are learning. The same is t...	hotrod	13	752	Jan 24, 2018 by Aline
	Newbie (Preview) Good morning everyone! I am new here to the chat room. I would like to know your thoughts on something. My husband is an alcoholic and we have had several relapses over our 24 years together. With his drinking comes talking to other women online. I have confronted him several times about this and he has l...	hockeygal	6	698	Jan 24, 2018 by WendyP
	Hope for Today Jan 21 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about the Alateen program and sponsorship within Alateen. I dont have any experience with Alateen so I cannot speak to this with any personal connection. The reading did remind me again about how vital my relationship with my sponsor has been in my recovery...	yanksfan51	5	646	Jan 23, 2018 by MeTwo2
	Losing my focus (Preview) I had some insight this past weekend and was able to share about it at my meeting which was helpful. I've noticed that my life has become unmanageable again. Ever since I worked the first step with my sponsor I have this little mental check list to see how unmanageable my life has become based on who I de...	KT2015	9	714	Jan 23, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	Courage to Change 1-12-18 (Preview) Today's reading is about detachment. The writer discusses watching a colony of bees and feeling a bit intimidated by the buzzing and frenzied motion around the hive. She's reminded that if she didn't poke her nose into their hive, she would not get stung. If we choose to maintain a safe distance fr...	Iamhere	11	1204	Jan 23, 2018 by Iamhere
	I think he gets it (Preview) During the conversation AH and I had on Friday where he essentially asked my permission to drink, I said something to him that I think struck a chord with him. I let him go on about his drinking and what he felt my role in it was (he was trying to shift the blame to me so he could justify drinking âjust a couple...	Twinkies	4	655	Jan 22, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	Struggling with grief today (Preview) Hi everyone I just need to post because the grief is really back with a bang the last few days. My ex partner died 12 weeks ago today. We had been finished 3 months, I had been no contact for the last two, I had changed my number as I had really reached the end of the line with it and felt no contact was the only wa...	Sorcha	12	810	Jan 22, 2018 by Takotsubo
	C2C, 1/22 (Preview) Detaching with love: The writer today tells a humorous example of how she learned to detach with love. At first she felt it was a vague concept, then she detached without the love, and her F2F meeting allowed her to find detachment with love. Today's Reminder: With my Higher Power's help, I will kee...	Lyne	4	1261	Jan 22, 2018 by Iamhere
	He's laying on the floor...I can't lift him...What do I do? Binge alchohol husband passed out worried scared (Preview) New sign up here... Im trying to stay awake to keep an eye on my husband. He went out and DROVE home tonight from the bar and is in the worst condition I've ever seen him. He mumbled something about a fight, took a couple steps, fell, banged his head on the doorframe, and he is now laying on the bathroom floor...	NoMiHopeless	13	8681	Jan 22, 2018 by mamalioness
	Just checking in! (Preview) Hello to all my Al-Anon family at MIP! I am sorry to have been away so long, but there has been so much going on lately, and to be honest, I let my priority of taking care of myself (putting on my airplane oxygen mask first) slipped away from me for a while. But I feel like I am getting back to a more balanced p...	Bethany66	7	643	Jan 21, 2018 by Aline
	Wondering .. (Preview) I'm actually doing pretty well staying out of my own head and not invading others .. LOL .. it would make me more comfortable if my X would act out because then I would know we are still operating in the same way. At this point he has either figured out that he needs a court order or not .. it's not my problem n...	SerenityRUS	1	647	Jan 21, 2018 by Aline
	CTC Jan 20,2018 (Preview) in today's reading talks about keeping our anonymity within meetings, anonymity make it possible to leave all our surnames and labels ,expectations with which we have been burdened outside the alanon rooms, through our commitment to anonymity we can put aside what we are and begin to know who we are...	lookingup	8	674	Jan 20, 2018 by Tude
	Courage to Change 1/19/18 (Preview) Good morning MIP and happy Friday. Today's reading in C2C is all about self-acceptance and healing. The writer talks about becoming more comfy in his/her own skin through self-acceptance. While the program asks us to recognize and admit our limitations, we are also asked to accept that only a hi...	Iamhere	7	635	Jan 20, 2018 by Maresie
	3weeks in... (Preview) Today marks 3 weeks of sobriety for my AH. Things seem to be improving between us - weâve shared a few laughs and things seems more fluid and natural between us. And weâve had a positive conversation about our finances and have a tentative plan for going forward now that he purchased the classic car for o...	Twinkies	12	712	Jan 20, 2018 by Tude
	ice skating (Preview) Can anyone answer this_ how do you work out if you want to stay with your alcoholic whose wobbling on their ice skates and keeps falling over. They may never get up again -and were standing up for 12 years? A bit cryptic and hope you know what I mean. He hasn't wobbled or fallen off for 12 yrs. A non alcoholic...	ling	8	791	Jan 20, 2018 by Tude
	Hope in Recovery (Preview) I love how we share our ESH in recovery. I wanted to share how 'it' works when we work it! My oldest child, 25, is sober about 2.5 months. This is a child who, like me, showed many 'isms' before he ever consumed a mind altering substance. This is a child, like me, who found courage from the first mind-alt...	Iamhere	5	2725	Jan 19, 2018 by Iamhere
	A long time coming (Preview) Years ago I attended Al Anon when my ex husband decided to go to AA. I learned a lot there; about his disease....and mine. Now, years later, my son is in his 3rd round of treatment for drug dependency/alcoholism and I realize I need to get myself healthy again. I am looking for meetings in my area that a...	ChangingTide	9	782	Jan 19, 2018 by Tude
	A glimmer of home? (Preview) I don't know if you all read my post about my son but he is 28- in a downward spiral. My daughter called and said he texted her and asked the name and number for the therapist she recommended to him a while back... I know he KNOWS he has a problem- but I also understand the courage it takes to ask for help. He i...	LuvMySun	9	766	Jan 19, 2018 by Tude
	My Sister is Trying to "Save" my AD (Preview) My AD is 30 years old and is now in deep financial trouble and homeless. Her boyfriend kicked her out this week and she texted me last month that she is over $10k in debt. The good thing is that she is alive and has a job, even though her wages are now being garnished. I made a couple of suggestions to her via te...	Green Eyes	13	1502	Jan 19, 2018 by Tude
	Walking down a different street (Preview) A year ago, I saw Valentines Day fast approaching at a time my son was about to graduate. Now in his early 30s, I thought the time had FINALLY come for him to commit to his long-time, live-in girlfriend, who had followed him and his long academic career while making a happy home for them both. To me, it l...	2HP	8	922	Jan 19, 2018 by Maresie
	new comer posting moved from the Business Board (Preview) Post InfoTOPIC: NewcomerL1983 Newbie Status: OnlinePosts: 1Date: 31m agoIP: 94.2.230.176NewcomerPermalink Reply Quote More Hi Im not too sure how this works. Im new here and to Al-anon. I have heard how much it can help people and Ive realised how desperate I am to get better. My father is an...	hotrod	6	701	Jan 18, 2018 by hotrod
	Courage to Change 1/18/18 (Preview) Today's reading discusses 'help' and what it looked like for most of us before recovery. The writer considered Al-Anon 'heartless' when she first heard that the best way to help an alcoholic was to focus on self. She had decided to not return and one statement changed her mind. She was told that the...	Iamhere	5	660	Jan 18, 2018 by Iamhere
	Ideas needed to mentally separate AH from the disease (Preview) Hi Everyone - Are there any other ideas or suggestions you can give me of how I can mentally separate my AH from this disease? Here's the scenario that plays each night: AH comes home from work, drinks a beer that we can "see" but has already had his vodka or other alcohol of choice by now. He then goes t...	jtpickle	5	718	Jan 18, 2018 by jtpickle
	Courage to Change January 17 (Preview) Today's reading in courage to change is about step two - a return to sanity. The author shares that if someone had been observing their actions prior to AlAnon, they would have seemed like the one who was insane. Living with an active alcoholic and trying to control alcoholic behavior resulted in all...	Skorpi	6	804	Jan 18, 2018 by Aline
	Letting it all go (Preview) AH and I have been up and down the last few days. Part of it was me, part of it was him. Iâm new to this way of life too and heâs not the only one struggling with his choice to stop drinking. Iâm grateful heâs come to this point - finally, after years of praying, of hoping, of dreaming - weâve finally taken the fi...	Twinkies	11	807	Jan 17, 2018 by MaggieRuth
	AA and court... (Preview) Hi everyone. My AF who lives on our property has been going to AA a few weeks now. She has a court date over DUI coming up the 24th. When she stopped over to get her mail I asked her what the court date was (i had forgotten it) and if her sponsor was going with her to court.......no. I guess my concerns are if sh...	Tude	6	709	Jan 17, 2018 by Maresie
	scared and worried for my son adult son downward spirla (Preview) without making this too long- I am scared and worried for my adult son... his dad (my ex husband) was/is alcoholic and my son has been in a downward spiral for months now. I am remarried (since my son was 11- he is now 28) but his Dad has painted my husband as the "bad guy" and my son always craved time and atte...	LuvMySun	15	895	Jan 17, 2018 by hotrod
	THe guilt, the fear, the sadness (Preview) Last night A EX-BF came round without announcement and wanted to dry out here. I asked my parents to come over because I dind't want my first weekend alone to be alone, so there was nowhere for him to sleep. He was lost and scared and breaking and I had to turn him round to send him back to his hotel. I know tha...	MizzB	4	775	Jan 17, 2018 by Maresie
	freaking out (Preview) Hi friends I just want to drop this here. I would love some help seeing this with program eyes. We are packing up our apartment. I only have a few more days before I leave. I need to get all the stuff out. That includes my AH's stuff. I still can't talk to him so I have to make judgement calls on everything - ev...	AnnieFenk321	6	717	Jan 17, 2018 by Tude
	C2C reading 1-16-2018 (Preview) The C2C reading for January 16 points out that we react instantly to situations and forget to THINK and pray before we RESPOND. /It suggest that this is a personality flaw and indicates that many of our irrational reactions are automatic and if we take the time to THINK we will respond in a ore const...	hotrod	7	734	Jan 16, 2018 by Hoot Nanny
	More revealed .. (Preview) So I had a good laugh at myself over the weekend .. at the moment it looks like there will be more court. I know shocking right?? LOL. Oi. I'm going to see what he has going on I'm not the one jumping to file, I have no intension .. it plays to my favor. I know I'm horrible however after doing this for 7 year...	SerenityRUS	9	725	Jan 16, 2018 by SerenityRUS
	Progress forward (Preview) I have been working hard on my recovery. I have been doing a lot of processing and its been so hard. I had a break down yesterday. I had not had been grocery shopping for awhile as it reminds me of the alcoholic. Well, yesterday I finally faced my fear and got groceries. Well, that was a trigger big time. I go...	joker	9	735	Jan 16, 2018 by Tude
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.