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I Could Use some ESH
(Preview)
I go to 3 different F2F meetings and each one has a different effect on me. One I feel like I can say anything. The second one I have trouble saying anything at all... so I ususally remain quiet. The third one is sort of in-between. I have have phone lists for all of them.&...
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sandie123
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5
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427
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Step book
(Preview)
Can anyone recommend a step book that i could buy. I would really like to start writing and getting a sponsor.
thanks
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jmath31
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2
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362
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Anti-Depressants
(Preview)
I was wondering if I should try taking a doctor prescribed anti-depressant until I have some more of the program to build on. I try to stay away from prescribed drugs when possible but I'm feeling really down and it's starting to affect me physically and spiritually. Any experience anyo...
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Kim2
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8
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428
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A bit of reflecting
(Preview)
I went to Florida this weekend to visit my new friend who I met in Chicago. I had a blast - he took me to Sanibel Island for the weekend which was gorgeous, bought me two dozen roses, treated me to a terrific trip. We crammed alot in two days - went to the beach both days to watch the sunset, sunri...
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Cyn
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2
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424
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Spiritual, or Religious prayer.
(Preview)
Hi, Been in Alanon for 15 years, & have often wondered about closing with the "Our Father". Finally, a member pointed out that from his position as a non-Christian, this prayer could not be said. I am a Christian , but it disturbs me to see the group, holding hands & saying the "Our Father", &...
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red hook
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8
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1063
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How do I do it?
(Preview)
I want to be able to just say that my husband is a drunk and then just pretend like he doesn't exist. But how do I do that and go on about my days when my daughter can't even have a sleepover with her friends at our house because I never know if or what kind of shape my A will come home in. I can't take the risk that I...
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2D1S
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6
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467
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my mother filed - brother started his 30days at Bridgewater yesterday!
(Preview)
She filed the report. There was enough from talking with my brother to have him arrested for elderly abuse charges without her having to testify.
I called the courthouse to see "what happened" yesterday as my mother called me today to call me a liar, say I knew what was going on when I have no idea, etc....
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Barbara
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2
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275
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my feelings
(Preview)
im really struggling with the whole thing of my a and i separating. i didnt want this, i just wanted peace for the night and for us to stop reacting on eachother. why couldnt i just stop and think before i reacted. right now i feel more miserable then i ever was when the a did relapse. i told him to leave becau...
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notsonew1111
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4
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437
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Doesn't it make U feel like U really were to blame .........
(Preview)
If they finally obtain sobriety when no longer with you?!?!?!? If he finally does it after trying for so many years, I would definately feel, for the rest of my life that it really was me, that only him leaving me meant he could finally be healthy. That would be very hard to live with, especi...
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sdisnie
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8
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379
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divorce?
(Preview)
I am new here and really glad to have found this site. I have been trying to attend meetings but due to lack of assistance/support and a child with medical problems...I often don't have anyone to stay with my child. I have purchased a bunch of the materials and have read them all. I have been...
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2D1S
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4
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522
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Happy Compromise
(Preview)
Just a quick update on the new job. We found a compromise at our last meeting over the weekend. I will work a few Saturdays to learn the business, their products, pricing etc. Then if the fit is comfortable I will give notice at my present job. So see, it does all work out. ...
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marmare
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5
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319
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My Melt down (but we like chocolate melted anyhow...)
(Preview)
I am a woman
therefore, I am emotional
I got home from work today, and the dog got out of her kennel, and had destroyed the house.
My husband was not home
I almost left my marraige over this.
I could go on for pages and pages... would you read it? I wouldn't.
I yelled at God f...
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captcodee
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3
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324
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A Nice Day & Prayer Request
(Preview)
I think yesterday had to be one of the nicest days since my A got clean and sober. We woke up and my A made us breakfast, we watched a movie, just laying in bed. Then when I wrote the grocery list, he volunteered to go shopping with me. It's been years since we went grocery shopping toget...
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marmare
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4
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430
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coming home from rehab
(Preview)
Today my husband will be home from rehab. Not sure how to feel about it, he has been gone about two months...took him awhile to go to detox after I threw him out. Kids really want him to come home. I am not sure at all how to react to the situation. I am still angry, hurt, disappointed and just down right p'd. R...
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Andrea12
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6
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318
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An article about self....
(Preview)
SELF ESTEEM, SELF LOVE and SELF CENTEREDNESS by Nancy Poitou, M.A., M.F.T.
I have been asked often about what is self-esteem, self-love and self-centeredness. These are very good questions and it is a fine line that separates these concepts.
Self esteem means to hold oneself in high esteem, fe...
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Phil
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1
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367
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ESH
(Preview)
What does "ESH" mean?
Thank you for your help.
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ditto
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2
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775
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'Ex' lover still in the picture? Am I being unreasonable?
(Preview)
Need some help sorting this out. As my ex wife and I are trying to figure out whether we can work things out, we are still living in the same house with our 2 kids. She has moved back to our bedroom a few months ago. A strange living arrangement, I know. (The buyers of our house backed out on the deal, so we st...
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UncleLou
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13
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580
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ticked at myself
(Preview)
I am walking around the house - like a nut - of course everyone else is sitting on their butts not doing a dang thing. And I have to ask myself - "What am I so pissed about - exactly??" OK it isn't that they aren't doing anything cause I could get them involved one way or another if I really wanted too. I am ticke...
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sparkette
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9
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462
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Prayers needed
(Preview)
I will be heading out next week for some time alone to make my final decision, although I think I it is pretty much being made for me every day in his actions. Please pray that I won't be selfish and that I will think of all envolved in this decision to stay or go. It h...
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jrtjosey
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11
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444
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What to do?????
(Preview)
If my A (who is my son), is living with me in a separate guesthouse, goes out and doesn't come home all night sometimes, and I am not ready to make him leave yet, should I just ignore it and not ask any questions? I know he will lie so how do I just let it go so I am not worrying all the time. Most of the time I have be...
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Gailey
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3
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332
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boundaries
(Preview)
I have been looking closely at the issue of boundaries with the A as he is able to blur the boundaries and crash over mine so well. We have been 5 years into a relationship that has been one that has been essentialy boundaryless for me most of the time.
I have bought a my own storyline about h...
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maresie
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8
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505
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anyone know???
(Preview)
i enjoy doing 5k run/walk with friends. so far i have ran for abused wives, cancer, AIDS, children's hospital,...ect. i feel they are a good pick me up and nice time away from the kids, while still helping a good cause.
does anyone know of some sort of 5k run/walk that benefits alcoholic families, fam...
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flintfeet
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3
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682
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just kidding (myself)
(Preview)
First of all, may I just say an enormous thank you to everyone on the boards. I really did not expect the understanding and support that I have received here. I haven't been to a F2F meeting yet, but I plan to go today or tomorrow. (Wednesday is my birthday so I want to go at least once be...
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paintthinnr
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2
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286
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Me Today
(Preview)
Those of you that have kept up with my crazy insane story, and helped me out with your comments. Thank you, I love you all.
Yesterday my husband told me from 1000 miles away he wanted a divorce, yadayadayada, you know the story. I had called my parents because I really have no one el...
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sdisnie
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4
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297
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STOP THE INTERFERENCE
(Preview)
Today is one of those days when I think I just hate my A husband. Well, hate is a strong word....let's say really, really, really don't like right now.
He is sticking his nose into where it doesn't belong.
He has almost a year of recover...
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sas
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4
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404
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The road we choose.
(Preview)
I figure there are 3 roads that I could take.
1) What if I choose to be on that negative road of despair & hopeless thought, ya know that "you" road, it's "your fault", "you should have"? And what if he too stays on this negative road? Well, I guess then there are tw...
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DeAnna
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2
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395
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Two Monks - Letting Go
(Preview)
This was sent to me from my aunt, I hope it's not too preachy (will leave some of it out) I happen to love the story. Since she knows my on going goal (ok quest) of “letting go” and “detachment” I believe that my HP (God for me) was working when she told me of this and then sent the e-mail
**...
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tea2
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6
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471
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choice/destiny
(Preview)
"You can't control the wind
but you can
set your sails."
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kitty
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9
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386
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double standard
(Preview)
My A who moved out 5 weeks ago is mad at me because I went out with my friends from work last night.we went to the Eagles which really isn`t a bar..it`s a club and even families go there.I had fun had a few drinks and left my car there and got a ride from a sober friend.He has went out with friends on a monthly bas...
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allison
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8
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405
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taking care of yourself physically, mentally, spiritually - ever notice when
(Preview)
Ever notice when things are going well its easier to take care of yourself physically (diet, exercise, water) and the focus is less on spiritually?
But when there's an issue youre more focused emotionally and taking care of yourself physically tends to slide?
Ive noticed that taking care of mys...
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Barbara
|
5
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1581
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for all of you who worry about typos :))
(Preview)
(from typo queen iona54!!)
The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid.
Aoccdrnig to a rasercreeh at Cmagbirde Utivernisy, it deson't mttear in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taot...
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iona54
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9
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436
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Group Conscience Meeting
(Preview)
General Business Group Conscience Meeting
February 1, 2006
Chair: SenoraBob Co-Chair: Cabecka
Agenda Items
General Opening of Meeting followed by:
OLD BUSINESS
1. Approval of Minutes from January meeting
2. Meeting Schedule and Request for Volunteers - SenoraBo...
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bob6502
|
0
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418
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|
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Working 4th Step
(Preview)
I'm finally ready (after a mixture of procrastination and trouble with letting go) to work my fourth step.
As a lot of you already know I'm a double winner and also ACoA, so this is going to get a little complicated for me. I don't have any illusions about never having to do this again, but I also w...
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John_R
|
8
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407
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|
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Assumptions
(Preview)
Hi Everyone,
I attended a district AA workshop yesterday on sponsorship. Got to hear 5 different speakers talking about different issues regarding being or needing a sponsor. It was quite good and I learned many things which I can certainly apply to my own Al-Anon program. (And just for the reco...
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david62
|
8
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530
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HELP YOURSELF NOW
(Preview)
Dont wait to seek help. Anyone who has suffered from the effects of someone elses drinking faces constant emotional strains and pressures, and needs help in releiving these. You will find relief, understanding, support, and warmhearted help in an alanon family group. There you will, as one member...
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gardengal
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3
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336
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|
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Resentments
(Preview)
I am working really hard on not collecting any more resentments with the A. It is very difficult because he is always acting out in some way. Lately he has been on a dope binge. The financial aspect of that is bad enough (because he is hopelessly mired in debt) but there is a health aspect of i...
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maresie
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3
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354
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|
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Trying to be strong
(Preview)
My A went out after work yesterday and hasn't come home yet. Today I found him in a sleazy hotel and confronted him (again). He said he wasn't ready and I should just leave him alone. Then I came home and read some of the posts here. (I read mostly, only posted a few times). ...
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cabma
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9
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451
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|
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An ACOA Article "Shifting Gears"
(Preview)
SHIFTING GEARS:
THE ADULT CHILD AND SUCCESSFUL THERAPY
By: Tarpley M. Long, LCSW
Over the ten years I have worked with ACOAs and other codependents, my clients have presented me with an almost bewildering array of problems. Despite their diversity, however, a number of unifying them...
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kissers
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2
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353
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|
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Progress not perfection
(Preview)
I went to a f2f the other day. It was a pretty small meeting. So, I shared my dirty laundry. Not to often I do that. I had a real need to get things out though.
I have a male sponsor and he is from AA. At first he was just going to help me until we found a woman to help me. ...
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ZiggyDoodles
|
3
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980
|
|
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How Can I Forgive This? Adult Content!!!
(Preview)
Hi Friends,
About a week and a half ago, my ex-boyfriend, whom I was letting walk my dog and just being friends with, got drunk and walked to a friend of his in these apts. The friend called ME and wanted me to come get him as he was almost passing out. I told the friend that I couldn't get him or carry him to m...
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jonibaloni21
|
11
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505
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|
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what a diaster, why?
(Preview)
ok, this is going to be long. it was really a disaster yesturday, and i need to talk to someone.
some backround info: my sister and dad (A) live in the same apt complex (NOT same apt, though). her and i are NOT talking with my dad b/c we don't approve of his life situation. Anyway.....
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flintfeet
|
5
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469
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|
|
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Feeling Isolate & Wanting to Quit My F2F
(Preview)
I'm having a really hard time going to meetings the past few weeks. I feel very isolated and am not really making friends except for one couple. I'm trying to hang in there and see if this is just a mood that will pass, but it's discouraging that I've felt like this three weeks in a row now.&nb...
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WakingUp
|
10
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869
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Mother is mad at ME! Is this where I Let Go/Let God? or push forward w/it?
(Preview)
Spoke w/my mother today. Told her after she cancelled court Fri morn I called the lady at the courthouse. She got mad! Told me I went behind her back (which I did). Does not see that Ive been hearing soooo much about the abuse for over a year now that its time I finally do something! Told her I can file the rep...
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Barbara
|
3
|
325
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|
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The addict and birth defects?
(Preview)
Hello friends,
Does anyone know of any new evidence or studies on the past usage of meth/drugs/alcohol in the male or female and birth defects or future developmental problems? With all the different drugs that addicts may have used that have such toxic chemicals in them, I ca...
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cdb
|
4
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811
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so why am I second guessing
(Preview)
Good Morning!
So I have an opportunity to have this new job. My job satisfaction has been low since last September. This job is for a company that does erosion control, the pay is the same but after 90 days there is pay review and full family benefits, so why am I having problems sealing th...
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marmare
|
3
|
352
|
|
|
|
what goes on at a Business Meeting?
(Preview)
We're having one at my F2F next Sat
|
Barbara
|
2
|
331
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|
|
|
debilyn :)
(Preview)
Hello debilyn,
I was channel surfing today and saw part of the Miss Americal Pageant. One of the contestants had a pet pig and it did tricks for her. I thought fondly of you and of all the care and support you have given me. I am glad you have been a part of my life in alanon. cdb :)
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cdb
|
2
|
293
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|
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realization
(Preview)
for so long i have been asking how can i tc of myself? how can i get better? i realized that asking my a to leave yesterday was taking care of me in the best way i can. i got away from the madness for yesterday and today. i got to relax. which is what i wanted last night and today. relaxation. no nonsense a...
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notsonew1111
|
3
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352
|
|
|
|
Living with an angerholic/rageaholic
(Preview)
Hello friends :)
I came to alanon due to my 21 year old daughter's struggle with alcoholism/drug addiction. She is doing so well now, of course one day at a time :) The program tells us to focus on us which I have done and have been using the alanon tools in other areas of my life too. Recently I talk...
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cdb
|
8
|
6900
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|
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a reading on detachment
(Preview)
|
notsonew1111
|
2
|
2946
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|
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Mother postponed taking brother to court
(Preview)
She just cant do it! Its going to be me going to court to file the report. I do have an older brother but he's mentally handicapped. It needs to be a blood relative and Im it. I did call and speak w/the lady my mother spoke w/yesterday.
This lady said my mother really needs this done. There is a bite mark, la...
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Barbara
|
4
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393
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|
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on personal boundaries
(Preview)
|
notsonew1111
|
5
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1861
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Feeling down and tired with the life of an "A"
(Preview)
Hello group,
I'm really feeling down today and needed to vent in a healthy place. My "a" is supposed to do his DUI course this weekend and low and behold his best friend from school came in to town yesterday. This is a person who he drank with consistently and always got into to trouble wit...
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twinmom2
|
6
|
424
|
|
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rehab...yeah right!
(Preview)
i keep wondering if my dad caves in and goes to rehab if it is worth his time and their's as well. he doesn't want to quit drinking, doesn't have a problem, can stop whenever he wants to,...ect. i know rehab won't work unless he wants it. i think he would go just to have contact with my bro, sis,and i. i see him...
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flintfeet
|
5
|
402
|
|
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|
Found a massage from my Higher Power
(Preview)
This is not from Alanon literature and therefore left me picking my chin up off the floor. Thought I would share it with you all. It's real Step One stuff!!!!
My Love must be brought against every jarring circumstance, every uncertainty, to inject peace.
You have found that your peace must never d...
|
mon123
|
3
|
343
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|
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|
Caron Foundation-Workshop Information
(Preview)
Life Enrichment Workshops In an effort to offer Caron Life Enrichment Services to a greater number of our alumni and friends, we have instituted some modifications. The workshops have been reformatted into one-day events that will now be offered within the various regions throug...
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kissers
|
0
|
1934
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|
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? answered ~ emotional protection
(Preview)
"I just got back w/ an old flame, so I am taking it very, very slowly. Last month I told God I wasn't ready for a relationship & in HP's infinite humor, has proved me wrong again. "
"But the self-protection that is coming from the self-love is a nice surprise, I never knew what it meant t...
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kitty
|
4
|
524
|
|
|
|
Confusion
(Preview)
I'm hurting badly and just want someone who will understand to "hear" me. My alcoholic husband is playing serious head games with me and I've gotten so caught up in them it's making me sick, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I've gone to Al-Anon meetings for almost 6 yea...
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Kim2
|
3
|
314
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|
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|
HP answers our prayers
(Preview)
Today was a better day & I'm feeling stronger in myself. I know when I reach out in pain, not only is it a release of it all but then it quiets my mind & I can usually get an answer or sign from HP. When I feel helpless or lost, & call on God i can feel those under your skin shivers...&n...
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kitty
|
3
|
321
|
|
|
|
New. Please help!
(Preview)
Hi. I am new here. I am thinking about going to Al-Anon. I have never been before. My father was an alcoholic, but he quit before I was born. The thing that is giving me trouble though is my boyfriend. I have been with him for almost four years and I love him more tha...
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paintthinnr
|
7
|
332
|
|