Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

omajoy · omajoy

After all the recommendations for reading "Getting Them Sober" by Toby Rice Drews, I finally ordered it and read it completely through. I was expecting so much and must say that I was very disappointed. I found the advice typical but somehow it felt demeaning to spouses. Not being a spouse of an A ...

debilyn · debilyn

wrote you guys and fell asleep in my chair. woke to a half grown choc lab/red dobi pup licking my face. My first thought was he is gone again. Ya see he was him again. But at the jail ya had to talk on a phone and ya have glass between you. He was pink skinned and less wrinkly, rested,smili...

sld488 · sld488

I have had such a wonderful weekend I wanted to share. Of course it didn't start off so wonderful. My A/bf travels during the week and got to come home early friday and was there when I got home from work. Instead of hugs and kisses from him I got asked why I hadn't done t...

hersh · hersh

Hi everyone: Well AH and I talked lastnight (finally one night of sobriety). I told him I did not think we were going to work out. We gave each other turns to talk. He let me go first. I told him I didn't think things were going great and that I was beginning to think that it wa...

serendipity · serendipity

my ex ah has been seeing the kids with me here. he comes to my house. i don't really know where he lives. neither does he. i have been really kind and nice, friendly. he has been coldish, not knowing how to react to my genuine care and detatchment. he is a crack addict but, from what he told me tonight he has sw...

david62 · david62

Hi everyone, A post I read sorta touched a nerve in me today. Now this particular nerve gets plucked every now and then and I don't think I have ever mentioned it before but feel like I need to get it off my chest and on this board so I can try to get free of it! Something I read on here today really both...

Gailey · Gailey

I got back from Japan last Friday. I think I am still jetlagged. Me and hubby have been tired this entire week. Have not been online much and have not attended any f2f meetings. I need to get back into the swing of things. Vacation was a wonderful experience. San Francisco for 2 nights, Honnolul...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hi all, Alot happening all at once. Got the car back yesterday.

Found out hubby used my checking account to subscribe to a icky website. Closed my account opened another one that I will not get checks for. Told him that was a huge violation of my trust. Left it at that. Comp...

debilyn · debilyn

Hey we agree you are an A, that means you are two or more differnet people in the same body. Put yourself in MY place. I can wake up, turn around, greet you when I see ya, and you are not you, but the monster side of you! No wonder I found you in jail as you, I was so unnerved. I have not seen you in almost seven ye...

sandie123 · sandie123

I have a dilemma where I’m really torn as to what to do. This is the situation: My kids know that my family is full of alcoholics as well as my husband and his mother (his only living relative). I asked my husband to leave late October 2005, which he did. Our lives have been a whole lot calmer since he has...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

hello everyone. so the last post i wrote was written about a new guy that has come into my life. ive chosen in my mind not to pursue this as im definatly not ready. im at a point where i just want my independence and to take care of me. not to mention it's only been a month and a half since my a and i separated and h...

Diva · Diva

"I will not allow you to be here if you yell and scare the dog. That is a big one for me. Any "any" animal abuse and out the frigging door he goes. And I will help if he won't go." Debilyn, I love this quote from your post below. I feel exactly the same way. I am a big girl, and I have a choice, but don't dare sta...

nachoqtpie · nachoqtpie

Well, things have been going kind of rough as of late, and I'm really feeling a bit down. I haven't been praying as much as I need too, and that really takes a toll on me. This morning, I sat down and prayed about everything that is going on. I sat down and prayed about the A and T's relationship,...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hi Roomies, Thanks for all the hugs, prayers, and support. It helps soooooooooo mcuh to have a safe place to vent. Well He came home right before 9, I was shocked to see him.Said the car overheated on his way to his function so he stopped at his buddies house. He tinkered with that car, and it ha...

itsgot2bgd · itsgot2bgd

Hi ala-pals, I've been gone a while on vacation and had a week of getting back to normal life (that means laundry, grocery shopping, unpacking, etc, etc.). I have missed you and your posts so much. I have been thinking of your wisdom, shared here and in online meetings, as well...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

the past couple of weeks have been such a rollercoaster. i was totally focused on just me and living my life and was really enjoying it. so one night i went out with my friends and met someone. my a and i have been separated for about a month and a half now but we are still speaking and he is focused on getting m...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi evreyone, I hope you are all well. Summer is always hectic here. The kids are all home and this year the older ones have jobs. The little guys keep me busy, either with the pool or baseball and everything else that goes with summer. With summer winding down, I am looking forward to fall and sad th...

Hope · Hope

Hi, guys! Last night, me and my A (abstinent 3 years) had a talk about my feelings of not being included in his life anymore, since he is so intent on his recovery and considers it "his", a very personal fight, one he must do himself. Don't get me wrong, I completely support his efforts in every wa...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

Mayonnaise Jar & Coffee When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 cups of coffee… A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class b...

signseeker · signseeker

My "A" is constantly battling just like everyone else! I hate it when he looks at me and says "That's it!" - "No more!" Because I know that means he'll be drunk by the tie he comes home form work! The worst part is trating me like I'm stupid. I can't help that I'm mad when he comes home. I smell it as soon as he wa...

tishrijo · tishrijo

Anyone located even close to Northeastern Kansas?

nycbt · nycbt

Today I got marriage 2 yrs ago. When I got married I didn't realize how bad my life was, he was on his best behavior when we were planning the wedding. 2 yrs a go lets look back to that day..........I was very happy on that day, we went to disney world for our honeymoon, had a great time, and then a littl...

serendipity · serendipity

i was chairing a meeting tonight and one person brought up a topic. then i asked someone to start. and another person said "ok i'll start" and the he asked what the topic was and the person who brought up the topic started to explain and then went deeper into what the problem really was and she was going on f...

jonibaloni21 · jonibaloni21

Hi Everyone, Due to several confused friends, I am changing my nickname from jonibaloni21 from Texas, with only furbabies and an Ex-bf A , to Texasjoni21 to differentiate from the "other" jonibaloni as everyone is getting confused. I have been here a year now and have had lots of help thru many tr...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

Mostly this is just a vent but I'm sure lots of other people experience this frequently if not everyday. I'm so tired of being scapegoated and blamed for things that go wrong in my A's life. He's been late for work twice this week and says, its my responsibility to wake him up. Well, I...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

So I've been keeping you updated about how I've been doing and what's been going on with me. And it occured to me about what was really at the core about alot of my feelings. (And you newcomers are entitled to laugh, make comments or whatever you feel, because, yes, this is a commupance of some kind...

BeBlessed · BeBlessed

I heard someone say that "Being a people-pleaser can negatively affect you in many ways. I used to let other people tell me who I was. I played the role assigned to me by my current family and my family of origin. And living and going to school in a small communit...

maresie2 · maresie2

Its funny when you get to that point of not having anymore, I can finally set lots of limits with the A. After all I am not going to entertain it anymore. I can finally say I have had enough. I think it must be my huge martyr complex that made me feel I had to endure. I could never say to him this is n...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

This has been a full day, and it's only 12:30~I went to an al anon meeting, and we had a new comer. Which was good, I suppose. I guess what soured my desire to go back is that there was this one lady who when she's nice, she's fantastic. But when she's mean or whatever....

Like the old saying, if...

AlaMom · AlaMom

Husband moved back home yesterday after being seperated for 6 1/2 weeks. We have talked to each other every day since he moved out - some conversations more pleasant than others but we have seen each other only 4 times since the incident that caused our seperation. After doing my usual ru...

Gramma Pat · Gramma Pat

Thank you for your responses to my problem. I wanted to let you know that my husband walked out of his outpatient assessment. He said he was telling them what he thought of them when they asked him to leave. I don’t know where this man came from. In the 12 years I have known him he...

BeBlessed · BeBlessed

…haven’t really been able to participate in MIP online meetings lately (couple months anway)…able to say welcome and thank you, but not able to share. Have always struggled with living in a shell, feelings of rejections, and I can spot someone who doesn’t like a mile away – even o...

hmrnrnmm · hmrnrnmm

Ok I worked till 8pm on Monday8/7. My A picked me up after work. she slid over to let me drive before I came outside. I was suspicious but wanted to go home. It seems she took my new friend ( the one whose A father ran out of gas and I took him to her house). This new frie...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

14 Hello Dear Friends, I would just like to make a few comments on some of the posts I have been reading.... I have noticed alot of people feeling alone lately....well, in my opinion we are not alone we have the wonderful support of this terriffic program and the lovely people in...

debilyn · debilyn

A's sister called me and told me where he is. He is staying at this old scrum womans apt. I was not concerned he was cheating. On the way there I talked to hp. I thought well maybe his sis was lying. Maybe he won't be there. I was not anxious or mad or anything. No expectations. I did not know an apt. number...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

I just wanted to keep y'all posted. I am loathe to admit it, but yes...you were right. God showed up on time. In style. And every detail was attended too. I went to the Woman's Center today and talked to them some more about the situation. The conversation consisted of the followi...

Gramma Pat · Gramma Pat

New, blue, confused, that's me. My husband is a hardcore drinker and has been for many years. He can't stay off the sauce for more than 90 days or so. He went to treatment on the 19th of July because his long time friend and I confronted him with his out of control behavior. He wa...

krise · krise

I went to bed last night and as I was sinking down in the covers I was thinking about my present situation. My AH, whom I have been separated from the last 6 months, just sent me divorce paperwork last week. The agreement is completely one-sided (his side) and I've had to contact lawyers, et...

cher · cher

I need to express my graditude Wed. nite my hubby (an A)dissappease. Once again I think he is on a binge (and I was wrong) Couldn't bare the pain again and found this web site. You pulled me through a very hard time, gave me information to help myself, and it worked.Was what u were doing before worked c...

daisygrl4 · daisygrl4

i really want to talk in the chat room tonight but i can't get in. i try the link and it's the right one the page came up but the place the room should come up is just and empty black box. can anyone help

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hi roomies, Last night was an odd night. Kids and I got home and as soon as I walked in I knew my "A" was high like meth high. Why is that odd? He wasn't even home. I just felt it. I have learned to trust certain instincts of mine, because over the years I have learned to know the difference between my sickn...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

Goes hand in hand. Its a dance that seems to get old after a while and I find myself wishing to get off the dance floor sometimes. Coming to Alanon is like getting off the dance floor for me. Getting real with myself and my wants and desires. It feels weird to let the A dance by him...

omajoy · omajoy

I have read posts here for weeks and have posted a few myself. To be honest, I don't think anyone of you out there, regardless of your experiences, can really help anyone else. Oh, we can give our hugs and our support, but when the chips are truly down, you just have to go it alone. That is me. Alone. Most of y...

nmike · nmike

Hi Alanoners, We had a weekend round-up here in the northeast corner of Arizona. Many people come from afar every year. My AHsober was around because we had taken our son to the airport to fly back to start his second year of college. I asked my H to go with me to the roundup. The main reason is that there i...

Jill · Jill

We went to my brother’s wedding last weekend. My new sister in law’s stepmother was the pariah of the whole group – so controlling, didn’t “let” her ancient husband do what he wanted, etc. You guessed it – her husband is a very active alcoholic and she’s his keeper. I thank this program and you all for hel...

debilyn · debilyn

Is anyone near cape cod massachusets? spelled wrong I am sure. I don't need much. I am attempting to help someone who's mom died now she is homeless. thanks debilyn

whittibo · whittibo

I just found your site last night and have been reading some posts. I have shared my problems with friends on another board (pet board) and the advice was to go to Al-Anon. It's not feasible in my life to attend meetings. I am not good in groups, I don't want to go, and don't have the tim...

canadianguy · canadianguy

Hi group.... I get nervous, really nervous, when I see so many posts about alternative ways for people to gain sobriety... Yes, there are other ways, and yes, there are small percentages of people who are living testaments to those other ways.... Here is something I cut and paste...

doxie · doxie

I woke up EARLY this morning and couldn't get this stuff outta my head, so here I am! Let me start by saying that I need to get this down, I know this is a safe place. So I choose to do it here. These are my opinions only and this is what is working in my life. Doxie's therapy 101 to herself I guess.

...

daisygrl4 · daisygrl4

Hi all. I have been trying to log onto the online chats but for some reason it won't work for me. So I figured I would try this. I have been with my boyfriend (an A) for 5 1/2 years now. We met at college and He has drank all of our relationship. I don't know really where to start. My A is very mean when he drinks. H...

maresie2 · maresie2

On the weekend the A crashed my truck again. The whole side is all dented. He has no remorse nothing. He is like a psychopath. All he can say is "Me Me Me Me and some more me's". I know I can no longer live this life of his crazy chaos, lies and psychoapathism. I have been working on plan B for...

DoN4me · DoN4me

I woke up this morning almost relieved and refreshed. Start of day two living my life for my HP and me!

I realized some more about myself. I know I love myself enough now. So I have started making future plans for myself personal goals that I want to ...

shadow1 · shadow1

I just wanted to clairfy something. We seem to have 2 shadow's now. I have been getting alot of private messages in chat room, on the message board and email asking me, if the other shadow's posts are mine. They are not. Shadow1 on the message bo...

lmt123 · lmt123

I don't know which Alanon tool I used last nite, but I'm sure I used one, LOL! My 18 year old daughter (eaten up by anger towards her dad, my ex) did her usual nightly routine last nite. Bear with me now...

We live in this old house that we are remodeling, and the upstairs is se...

bluebjade · bluebjade

Hello All, first of all I want to say that finding MIP, is one of the best things that has ever happened to me. All of the post, have brought to light, so many things that I have been sweeping under the rug for so long now. Yesterday, my A, who for once was not drinking, so I took this opportuni...

marmare · marmare

Wow, how quickly we can slip back into our old ways...it happens in a matter of seconds. I then question why am I doing this.....I am sure with all the focus on my mother and caring for her in her final days I haven't worked my program. I am finding myself an emotional mess and listening to my A...

serendipity · serendipity

the only thing i'm not is hungry. not in the food sense anyway. almost all my life i have had a sleep disorder. the only times i haven't have been when i was content in a relationship or feeling secure in my grandparents home. so more often than not i just can't sleep. i have tried it all. massage worked but m...

Patches · Patches

I have to go home tonight to visit my mom, bro and A-dad. It was my b-day on Sunday and my bro is having surgery today, so I really have to go. I never know what to expect when I go home and I get physically ill before I go home. I guess my A-dad is on anti-depresents now, which is good, but I h...

hersh · hersh

Hi everyone: Well, I slipped big time. I was feeling so sure of myself and calm and everything seemed to be okay. AH called around 9:30, said he would be home soon. I have learned not to expect much, so I didn't really. I fell asleep. I wake up and look outside, worried...

gardengal · gardengal

I find myself daily worrying about things I have no control over. I find myself time to time dwelling in the past with feelings of guilt. Guilt for what? Guilt because I didnt do everything I could, or the I should have's , when the A was still here. Or guilt for things I did when the A was here?. My reactions...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	"Getting Them Sober" and other books (Preview) After all the recommendations for reading "Getting Them Sober" by Toby Rice Drews, I finally ordered it and read it completely through. I was expecting so much and must say that I was very disappointed. I found the advice typical but somehow it felt demeaning to spouses. Not being a spouse of an A ...	omajoy	10	1008	Aug 14, 2006 by annmarie
	just need ones who understand (Preview) wrote you guys and fell asleep in my chair. woke to a half grown choc lab/red dobi pup licking my face. My first thought was he is gone again. Ya see he was him again. But at the jail ya had to talk on a phone and ya have glass between you. He was pink skinned and less wrinkly, rested,smili...	debilyn	23	901	Aug 14, 2006 by Idealsummerluv
	Respond with kindness. (Preview) I have had such a wonderful weekend I wanted to share. Of course it didn't start off so wonderful. My A/bf travels during the week and got to come home early friday and was there when I got home from work. Instead of hugs and kisses from him I got asked why I hadn't done t...	sld488	2	498	Aug 14, 2006 by purpleraven
	Boundaries... (Preview) Hi everyone: Well AH and I talked lastnight (finally one night of sobriety). I told him I did not think we were going to work out. We gave each other turns to talk. He let me go first. I told him I didn't think things were going great and that I was beginning to think that it wa...	hersh	6	532	Aug 14, 2006 by Zyperiris
	experience please (Preview) my ex ah has been seeing the kids with me here. he comes to my house. i don't really know where he lives. neither does he. i have been really kind and nice, friendly. he has been coldish, not knowing how to react to my genuine care and detatchment. he is a crack addict but, from what he told me tonight he has sw...	serendipity	3	474	Aug 14, 2006 by Christy
	Trying to Let It Go! (Preview) Hi everyone, A post I read sorta touched a nerve in me today. Now this particular nerve gets plucked every now and then and I don't think I have ever mentioned it before but feel like I need to get it off my chest and on this board so I can try to get free of it! Something I read on here today really both...	david62	4	731	Aug 14, 2006 by david62
	back from a long vacation (Preview) I got back from Japan last Friday. I think I am still jetlagged. Me and hubby have been tired this entire week. Have not been online much and have not attended any f2f meetings. I need to get back into the swing of things. Vacation was a wonderful experience. San Francisco for 2 nights, Honnolul...	Gailey	4	510	Aug 13, 2006 by peewee
	Prayers Please! (Preview) Hi all, Alot happening all at once. Got the car back yesterday. Found out hubby used my checking account to subscribe to a icky website. Closed my account opened another one that I will not get checks for. Told him that was a huge violation of my trust. Left it at that. Comp...	Dolphin123	15	529	Aug 13, 2006 by peewee
	And another thing! (Preview) Hey we agree you are an A, that means you are two or more differnet people in the same body. Put yourself in MY place. I can wake up, turn around, greet you when I see ya, and you are not you, but the monster side of you! No wonder I found you in jail as you, I was so unnerved. I have not seen you in almost seven ye...	debilyn	1	491	Aug 13, 2006 by marmare
	Not Sure What To Do (Preview) I have a dilemma where I’m really torn as to what to do. This is the situation: My kids know that my family is full of alcoholics as well as my husband and his mother (his only living relative). I asked my husband to leave late October 2005, which he did. Our lives have been a whole lot calmer since he has...	sandie123	6	664	Aug 13, 2006 by Zyperiris
	assertiveness please.......... (Preview) hello everyone. so the last post i wrote was written about a new guy that has come into my life. ive chosen in my mind not to pursue this as im definatly not ready. im at a point where i just want my independence and to take care of me. not to mention it's only been a month and a half since my a and i separated and h...	notsonew1111	7	505	Aug 13, 2006 by lin0606
	Debilyn... (Preview) "I will not allow you to be here if you yell and scare the dog. That is a big one for me. Any "any" animal abuse and out the frigging door he goes. And I will help if he won't go." Debilyn, I love this quote from your post below. I feel exactly the same way. I am a big girl, and I have a choice, but don't dare sta...	Diva	2	541	Aug 13, 2006 by debilyn
	Finding Peace (Preview) Well, things have been going kind of rough as of late, and I'm really feeling a bit down. I haven't been praying as much as I need too, and that really takes a toll on me. This morning, I sat down and prayed about everything that is going on. I sat down and prayed about the A and T's relationship,...	nachoqtpie	1	437	Aug 13, 2006 by doxie
	Letting God do his job (Preview) Hi Roomies, Thanks for all the hugs, prayers, and support. It helps soooooooooo mcuh to have a safe place to vent. Well He came home right before 9, I was shocked to see him.Said the car overheated on his way to his function so he stopped at his buddies house. He tinkered with that car, and it ha...	Dolphin123	3	610	Aug 13, 2006 by Karilynn
	I feel like I'm growing (Preview) Hi ala-pals, I've been gone a while on vacation and had a week of getting back to normal life (that means laundry, grocery shopping, unpacking, etc, etc.). I have missed you and your posts so much. I have been thinking of your wisdom, shared here and in online meetings, as well...	itsgot2bgd	1	601	Aug 13, 2006 by lin0606
	new man in my life....... (Preview) the past couple of weeks have been such a rollercoaster. i was totally focused on just me and living my life and was really enjoying it. so one night i went out with my friends and met someone. my a and i have been separated for about a month and a half now but we are still speaking and he is focused on getting m...	notsonew1111	8	818	Aug 12, 2006 by itsgot2bgd
	Update (Preview) Hi evreyone, I hope you are all well. Summer is always hectic here. The kids are all home and this year the older ones have jobs. The little guys keep me busy, either with the pool or baseball and everything else that goes with summer. With summer winding down, I am looking forward to fall and sad th...	Jeannie	5	464	Aug 12, 2006 by leo
	Feeling selfish... (Preview) Hi, guys! Last night, me and my A (abstinent 3 years) had a talk about my feelings of not being included in his life anymore, since he is so intent on his recovery and considers it "his", a very personal fight, one he must do himself. Don't get me wrong, I completely support his efforts in every wa...	Hope	4	513	Aug 12, 2006 by maresie2
	Mayonnaise Jar and Coffee (Preview) Mayonnaise Jar & Coffee When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 cups of coffee… A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class b...	Mobirdie	6	611	Aug 12, 2006 by Jeannie
	Do they really think we're Stupid?? (Preview) My "A" is constantly battling just like everyone else! I hate it when he looks at me and says "That's it!" - "No more!" Because I know that means he'll be drunk by the tie he comes home form work! The worst part is trating me like I'm stupid. I can't help that I'm mad when he comes home. I smell it as soon as he wa...	signseeker	8	676	Aug 12, 2006 by signseeker
	Location...Location...Location? (Preview) Anyone located even close to Northeastern Kansas?	tishrijo	2	471	Aug 12, 2006 by confused
	2 yrs anniversary marriage (Preview) Today I got marriage 2 yrs ago. When I got married I didn't realize how bad my life was, he was on his best behavior when we were planning the wedding. 2 yrs a go lets look back to that day..........I was very happy on that day, we went to disney world for our honeymoon, had a great time, and then a littl...	nycbt	8	589	Aug 12, 2006 by aunitedway
	a little drama (Preview) i was chairing a meeting tonight and one person brought up a topic. then i asked someone to start. and another person said "ok i'll start" and the he asked what the topic was and the person who brought up the topic started to explain and then went deeper into what the problem really was and she was going on f...	serendipity	2	617	Aug 12, 2006 by SLS
	New Nick I Picked! (Preview) Hi Everyone, Due to several confused friends, I am changing my nickname from jonibaloni21 from Texas, with only furbabies and an Ex-bf A , to Texasjoni21 to differentiate from the "other" jonibaloni as everyone is getting confused. I have been here a year now and have had lots of help thru many tr...	jonibaloni21	0	443	Aug 11, 2006 by jonibaloni21
	How did I get scapegoated for all that goes wrong with the A? (Preview) Mostly this is just a vent but I'm sure lots of other people experience this frequently if not everyday. I'm so tired of being scapegoated and blamed for things that go wrong in my A's life. He's been late for work twice this week and says, its my responsibility to wake him up. Well, I...	twinmom2	2	670	Aug 11, 2006 by maresie2
	Living Easy Does It (Preview) So I've been keeping you updated about how I've been doing and what's been going on with me. And it occured to me about what was really at the core about alot of my feelings. (And you newcomers are entitled to laugh, make comments or whatever you feel, because, yes, this is a commupance of some kind...	Tiger2006	2	563	Aug 11, 2006 by maresie2
	Hope for the people-pleaser (Preview) I heard someone say that "Being a people-pleaser can negatively affect you in many ways. I used to let other people tell me who I was. I played the role assigned to me by my current family and my family of origin. And living and going to school in a small communit...	BeBlessed	3	634	Aug 11, 2006 by maresie2
	Being up against it. (Preview) Its funny when you get to that point of not having anymore, I can finally set lots of limits with the A. After all I am not going to entertain it anymore. I can finally say I have had enough. I think it must be my huge martyr complex that made me feel I had to endure. I could never say to him this is n...	maresie2	4	582	Aug 11, 2006 by maresie2
	Another day, another update (Preview) This has been a full day, and it's only 12:30~I went to an al anon meeting, and we had a new comer. Which was good, I suppose. I guess what soured my desire to go back is that there was this one lady who when she's nice, she's fantastic. But when she's mean or whatever.... Like the old saying, if...	Tiger2006	3	449	Aug 11, 2006 by maresie2
	Elephant in my living room... (Preview) Husband moved back home yesterday after being seperated for 6 1/2 weeks. We have talked to each other every day since he moved out - some conversations more pleasant than others but we have seen each other only 4 times since the incident that caused our seperation. After doing my usual ru...	AlaMom	6	568	Aug 11, 2006 by hummingbird
	Thanks-this is a great site with great folks (Preview) Thank you for your responses to my problem. I wanted to let you know that my husband walked out of his outpatient assessment. He said he was telling them what he thought of them when they asked him to leave. I don’t know where this man came from. In the 12 years I have known him he...	Gramma Pat	1	462	Aug 11, 2006 by abbyal
	Gotta Be... (Preview) …haven’t really been able to participate in MIP online meetings lately (couple months anway)…able to say welcome and thank you, but not able to share. Have always struggled with living in a shell, feelings of rejections, and I can spot someone who doesn’t like a mile away – even o...	BeBlessed	4	405	Aug 11, 2006 by Tiger2006
	hmm, advice, questions or comments? I am at my witts end. (Preview) Ok I worked till 8pm on Monday8/7. My A picked me up after work. she slid over to let me drive before I came outside. I was suspicious but wanted to go home. It seems she took my new friend ( the one whose A father ran out of gas and I took him to her house). This new frie...	hmrnrnmm	4	683	Aug 11, 2006 by Tiger2006
	We are not Alone, thanks for the Love (Preview) 14 Hello Dear Friends, I would just like to make a few comments on some of the posts I have been reading.... I have noticed alot of people feeling alone lately....well, in my opinion we are not alone we have the wonderful support of this terriffic program and the lovely people in...	Andrea12	7	529	Aug 11, 2006 by annmarie
	missed my chance (Preview) A's sister called me and told me where he is. He is staying at this old scrum womans apt. I was not concerned he was cheating. On the way there I talked to hp. I thought well maybe his sis was lying. Maybe he won't be there. I was not anxious or mad or anything. No expectations. I did not know an apt. number...	debilyn	13	629	Aug 10, 2006 by Jeannie
	Things are getting better (Preview) I just wanted to keep y'all posted. I am loathe to admit it, but yes...you were right. God showed up on time. In style. And every detail was attended too. I went to the Woman's Center today and talked to them some more about the situation. The conversation consisted of the followi...	Tiger2006	8	602	Aug 10, 2006 by debilyn
	New, Blue, Confused (Preview) New, blue, confused, that's me. My husband is a hardcore drinker and has been for many years. He can't stay off the sauce for more than 90 days or so. He went to treatment on the 19th of July because his long time friend and I confronted him with his out of control behavior. He wa...	Gramma Pat	3	474	Aug 10, 2006 by Dolphin123
	Moments of peace in the midst of turmoil (Preview) I went to bed last night and as I was sinking down in the covers I was thinking about my present situation. My AH, whom I have been separated from the last 6 months, just sent me divorce paperwork last week. The agreement is completely one-sided (his side) and I've had to contact lawyers, et...	krise	7	514	Aug 10, 2006 by Dolphin123
	u roomies r great (Preview) I need to express my graditude Wed. nite my hubby (an A)dissappease. Once again I think he is on a binge (and I was wrong) Couldn't bare the pain again and found this web site. You pulled me through a very hard time, gave me information to help myself, and it worked.Was what u were doing before worked c...	cher	3	437	Aug 10, 2006 by Andrea12
	chat room (Preview) i really want to talk in the chat room tonight but i can't get in. i try the link and it's the right one the page came up but the place the room should come up is just and empty black box. can anyone help	daisygrl4	2	436	Aug 10, 2006 by Becky1
	Gotta Love 2am phone calls. (Preview) Hi roomies, Last night was an odd night. Kids and I got home and as soon as I walked in I knew my "A" was high like meth high. Why is that odd? He wasn't even home. I just felt it. I have learned to trust certain instincts of mine, because over the years I have learned to know the difference between my sickn...	Dolphin123	9	646	Aug 10, 2006 by hersh
	The addict and the codependent (Preview) Goes hand in hand. Its a dance that seems to get old after a while and I find myself wishing to get off the dance floor sometimes. Coming to Alanon is like getting off the dance floor for me. Getting real with myself and my wants and desires. It feels weird to let the A dance by him...	twinmom2	5	829	Aug 10, 2006 by maire rua
	No heart or soul left (Preview) I have read posts here for weeks and have posted a few myself. To be honest, I don't think anyone of you out there, regardless of your experiences, can really help anyone else. Oh, we can give our hugs and our support, but when the chips are truly down, you just have to go it alone. That is me. Alone. Most of y...	omajoy	12	692	Aug 10, 2006 by omajoy
	Weekend roundup and AHsober went with... (Preview) Hi Alanoners, We had a weekend round-up here in the northeast corner of Arizona. Many people come from afar every year. My AHsober was around because we had taken our son to the airport to fly back to start his second year of college. I asked my H to go with me to the roundup. The main reason is that there i...	nmike	2	523	Aug 10, 2006 by athena12
	Depending on the Promise (Preview) We went to my brother’s wedding last weekend. My new sister in law’s stepmother was the pariah of the whole group – so controlling, didn’t “let” her ancient husband do what he wanted, etc. You guessed it – her husband is a very active alcoholic and she’s his keeper. I thank this program and you all for hel...	Jill	5	483	Aug 10, 2006 by annmarie
	Need help (Preview) Is anyone near cape cod massachusets? spelled wrong I am sure. I don't need much. I am attempting to help someone who's mom died now she is homeless. thanks debilyn	debilyn	5	513	Aug 9, 2006 by nikkilou
	New. Not sure where to start (Preview) I just found your site last night and have been reading some posts. I have shared my problems with friends on another board (pet board) and the advice was to go to Al-Anon. It's not feasible in my life to attend meetings. I am not good in groups, I don't want to go, and don't have the tim...	whittibo	11	630	Aug 9, 2006 by drucilla06
	Is AA the "only" way to sobriety? (Preview) Hi group.... I get nervous, really nervous, when I see so many posts about alternative ways for people to gain sobriety... Yes, there are other ways, and yes, there are small percentages of people who are living testaments to those other ways.... Here is something I cut and paste...	canadianguy	12	5216	Aug 9, 2006 by Jill
	I'm tired of being the victim, I want a life (Preview) I woke up EARLY this morning and couldn't get this stuff outta my head, so here I am! Let me start by saying that I need to get this down, I know this is a safe place. So I choose to do it here. These are my opinions only and this is what is working in my life. Doxie's therapy 101 to herself I guess. ...	doxie	9	660	Aug 9, 2006 by maresie2
	new and fed up (Preview) Hi all. I have been trying to log onto the online chats but for some reason it won't work for me. So I figured I would try this. I have been with my boyfriend (an A) for 5 1/2 years now. We met at college and He has drank all of our relationship. I don't know really where to start. My A is very mean when he drinks. H...	daisygrl4	14	593	Aug 9, 2006 by Katastrophe
	the A crashed my truck again ! (Preview) On the weekend the A crashed my truck again. The whole side is all dented. He has no remorse nothing. He is like a psychopath. All he can say is "Me Me Me Me and some more me's". I know I can no longer live this life of his crazy chaos, lies and psychoapathism. I have been working on plan B for...	maresie2	6	477	Aug 9, 2006 by maresie2
	New Beginning - ODAT (Preview) I woke up this morning almost relieved and refreshed. Start of day two living my life for my HP and me! I realized some more about myself. I know I love myself enough now. So I have started making future plans for myself personal goals that I want to ...	DoN4me	2	447	Aug 9, 2006 by MsgBo
	Just to clairfy things (Preview) I just wanted to clairfy something. We seem to have 2 shadow's now. I have been getting alot of private messages in chat room, on the message board and email asking me, if the other shadow's posts are mine. They are not. Shadow1 on the message bo...	shadow1	2	482	Aug 9, 2006 by Dolphin123
	I think I used my Alanon tools last nite...(kinda long) (Preview) I don't know which Alanon tool I used last nite, but I'm sure I used one, LOL! My 18 year old daughter (eaten up by anger towards her dad, my ex) did her usual nightly routine last nite. Bear with me now... We live in this old house that we are remodeling, and the upstairs is se...	lmt123	4	441	Aug 9, 2006 by lmt123
	Did I take a step? (Preview) Hello All, first of all I want to say that finding MIP, is one of the best things that has ever happened to me. All of the post, have brought to light, so many things that I have been sweeping under the rug for so long now. Yesterday, my A, who for once was not drinking, so I took this opportuni...	bluebjade	12	839	Aug 9, 2006 by RichardA
	So many excuses (Preview) Wow, how quickly we can slip back into our old ways...it happens in a matter of seconds. I then question why am I doing this.....I am sure with all the focus on my mother and caring for her in her final days I haven't worked my program. I am finding myself an emotional mess and listening to my A...	marmare	7	747	Aug 9, 2006 by Dolphin123
	H.A.L.T. (Preview) the only thing i'm not is hungry. not in the food sense anyway. almost all my life i have had a sleep disorder. the only times i haven't have been when i was content in a relationship or feeling secure in my grandparents home. so more often than not i just can't sleep. i have tried it all. massage worked but m...	serendipity	2	438	Aug 9, 2006 by Dolphin123
	Scared to go home tonight (Preview) I have to go home tonight to visit my mom, bro and A-dad. It was my b-day on Sunday and my bro is having surgery today, so I really have to go. I never know what to expect when I go home and I get physically ill before I go home. I guess my A-dad is on anti-depresents now, which is good, but I h...	Patches	3	489	Aug 9, 2006 by drucilla06
	Big Slip.... (Preview) Hi everyone: Well, I slipped big time. I was feeling so sure of myself and calm and everything seemed to be okay. AH called around 9:30, said he would be home soon. I have learned not to expect much, so I didn't really. I fell asleep. I wake up and look outside, worried...	hersh	9	571	Aug 9, 2006 by drucilla06
	Are you living just for today? Or are you living in the past worrying about the future? (Preview) I find myself daily worrying about things I have no control over. I find myself time to time dwelling in the past with feelings of guilt. Guilt for what? Guilt because I didnt do everything I could, or the I should have's , when the A was still here. Or guilt for things I did when the A was here?. My reactions...	gardengal	6	514	Aug 9, 2006 by Karilynn
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.