Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

maresie2 · maresie2

A friend of mine who is also in the program has been helping me a lot lately to break my stuff down into small pieces and keep working on those pieces. Normally a holiday with the A around would be a nightmare. If he is not drinking or using he is just a lump stuck in the middle of the TV feeling sorry for...

Barbara · Barbara

Moms been subpoened to testify Brother living in small apartment, not working, lost his part time job even Mom wants this over and is willing to take brother back in to live at her condo Me? Im detaching (as well as I can) - its a sick sick family

lmt123 · lmt123

I guess this post is more like me needing to just journal in a safe way. So for what it's worth (if you can stand reading a long post), here goes... I'm feeling really confused about what I want out of my life, and what I need from those who are closest to me. I've felt this way probably...

BeBlessed · BeBlessed

They say that living in a dysfunctional family changes who you are. I believe that being a member of the Al-anon family can also change who you are.

Although I am feeling pretty good right now - as may be reflected in my previous post - I know that this too shall pass (Darn it! I used to...

lani · lani

Hello everyone, I am new here and new to the Al-anon program. My husband of 13 years just returned from treatment and has been home for 5 days. He has been sober for 36 days and is struggling daily to keep himself on track. He is doing okay but, after tonight I am really starting to wonder how much longer I...

daisy2 · daisy2

Hope you can say "YES" to all of these!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..one old love she can imagine going back to.. and one who reminds her how far she has come... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..enough money within her c...

Lexie · Lexie

Hello dear (((((friends))))) My son's sentencing hearing is Tuesday, September 5. I am trusting God for the best outcome, but still have moments of nervousness and anxiety in anticipation. My son has been clean for 18 months now and is doing extremely well in every area of h...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello Dear Friends, Well been getting thru minute by minute right now......The addition has totally taken over the addict once again....I can't worry about that.... So happy I start a new job on Tuesday....that is so great...I am very thankful about that......moving f...

maresie2 · maresie2

I have been going through my stuff all weekend and am part the way through the task of being ready. I think that is some of the issue being ready for what God has in store for me. I oftentimes am not ready. I have been overdue on decluttering and getting rid of stuff for more than a year now.&nbs...

WifeinDespair · WifeinDespair

I feel silly asking more from each of you, but already the response has been overwhelming. Thank you for those that posted a response to my original post. Your ideas, suggestions and empathy have already lifted my heart! I think that I am just so thankful to know that I am not alone a...

serendipity · serendipity

my ex just left after spending the day with the kids here at my home. i am feeling so lonlely that i thought about just crawling into his arms. that's pretty low for me. after all he has done and not done to me and for me i know i'm in a bad space to even have that thought in my head. and it's not him. it's me and my f...

daisygrl4 · daisygrl4

HI all. So far it has been 30 hours since I have talked to my A. I know it seems lame to count but it is longest I have ever gone in 5 1/2 years. Yesterday was his family's bbq and I decided not to go to avoid the everyone pretending he's not drinking situation and me crying. I hung up...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello Friends, I am so tired of this damn life.....I feel trapped.....I am sick to death of the life of hell I live.....I am trying so very hard to hang on until hub gets a couple of checks....him being out of work has drained us....now that he is back to work the past couple of days have been a living he...

hmrnrnmm · hmrnrnmm

Phew! I was so rattled today at work. The 73 yro man I sit with was hell bent determined to drive his truck into town and buy his liquor. It was said he used to drink the biggest bottle of liquor a day. I saw an empty bottle of vodka when I first started working. I started in the end of March. His...

BeBlessed · BeBlessed

I must say that since I turned my will and life over to the care of God, my life has changed a great deal. Through the fellowship of Al-anon and working the steps I have learned to ask myself question like… 1. what is going on with me? 2. what hurts? 3. what feels good? 4. what do I want? 5. what do I need? 6...

hunnydoll · hunnydoll

Hello, Thank you for your warm welcome. I really needed that. Im looking forward to hearing from you and chating with you. Im so anxious to get started with the steps and traditions. I have been to several local meetings. Im a cocktail waitress and I have such anxiety speaking in public. I know this so...

Leah · Leah

Hello,,,,,hoping you are all doing the best you are able to right now. I am writing in hopes that some of you wise and learned people may be able to offer me somethings I can try with my very alcoholic Father. I can't just ask him not to drink as much as he does, and certainly asking him and expe...

son_of_a · son_of_a

hi everyone, my stepdad is a recently-diagnosed alcoholic. my mom was very dependant on him for many years until his condition worsened. then their roles reversed - she took over all aspects of their lives - managing bills, health & work issues etc. unfortunately, recently m...

marmare · marmare

I have to tell you it is like a light went on inside my head. I think I get it!!!! Tonight my A called on his way home. He is so upset, he has had a lead on a jobsite that has been okaying extra breaks, early outs, on company time. It's a temporary jobsite for my A, but he worked for this compa...

bluebjade · bluebjade

hELLO EVERYONE, I Need some advice. I have heard my A talking about a ballgame taking place this weekend. I have heard conversations about a bonfire and a party. This will take place outside. They will watch or listen to the ballgame in his shop, but they will be getting drunk.&n...

hmrnrnmm · hmrnrnmm

I heard this song in the middle of all the crap last nite. It was so true except the part of being stoned. I don't do that anymore. (rock ) It sucks to feel you live alone when you don't. THREE DAYS GRACE LYRICS "Home" I’ll be coming home Just to be alone Cause I know you’re n...

Diva · Diva

Walking the walk, quite another. I read time and time again that we do not have to allow the behavior of the A to affect our moods. And that only WE are responsible for how we respond to the A's condition. NOTHING and NO ONE can make us feel sad, confused, hurt, angry, frustrated, miserable, or alone....

nmike · nmike

Hi friends, I started back to work last week. It has been hectic ever since. I am having to make alot of adjustments because my facility is being renovated. Also, we have to add another class to make our workload. I am on the run, tired, and frustrated. So in a week and a half I have already embarassed a st...

Gramma Pat · Gramma Pat

I have worked hard this week trying to put thing into order for me to leave my AH. I felt that was best for both of us. . I was sure that I was making the right move. Then..........it seems like doors started to close. I had 3 people who have many years in Al-Anon tell me the program...

Lani · Lani

Personal Power “The deep root of failure in our lives is to think, ‘Oh how useless and powerless I am.’ It is essential to think strongly and forcefully, ‘I can do it,’ without boasting or fretting.” -- Dalai Lama Angeles Arrien says that whether we are male or female, we need to develop three kin...

curious · curious

Well, I made it. I fret about it before going, I got physically ill while there, but I made it through family week. for those of you out there that have had the experience maybe you will understand. For those of you that have not had the experience I wanted to share some of my experienc...

rtexas · rtexas

(((Everyone))) I posted earlier about a delima I was having about helping my in-laws move. Well you offered me some wonderful words, which I didn't read until it was too late. <sigh> I did what I thought was right. Called my in-laws and asked if they wanted my help and as...

bev · bev

my a husband went out tonite,just left about 20 min ago and it is only 7 at nite..he wanted me to drive him to the bar,but i said no told him to just go,i will pick the car up later..he said for me to come down around 9 to be with him,told him i dont like bars,he says but you like karao...

ohera101 · ohera101

Two weeks ago, I told my AH that we couldn't have a relationship 'til he started some real recovery. He has his own place now, and comes by to visit our two year old occasionally. He doesn't show up very often now that I've told him he doesn't have responsibility at our home as an excuse for drinking. My the...

debilyn · debilyn

I still have addresses. Just been so sick, well now, and am poor now.lol but will get them off to you. I did not forget. love,debilyn

artygirl · artygirl

Hello All... If you've been keeping up, I'm in the process of filing for divorce from my A/cocaine-addicted husband. He doesn't know my plan... yet. I was thinking about writing him a letter. He's very hard to communicate with (imagine that!) and avoids conversation with me lately. I would li...

gardengal · gardengal

For years I blamed the A's in my life for whatever "I" was feeling that day. If he wouldnt have done this or that, I wouldnt be feeling this way today etc. If my sadness/worry/anger would flare up it would be due to his actions. I would isolate from friends and family, I would sit at home and cry, sink into th...

hersh · hersh

Hi everyone.... What a nutty time this is. I can’t believe one can feel so many emotions at once. Now AH feels horrible after this week, being drunk all the time, threatening to have his car repossessed, the mortgage behind, me finding out about the phone calls wit...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((((((((Family)))))))))), Well it is now officially my Alanon 1 year anniversary.

I came here exactly one year ago, afraid, unsure, confused, shy and beyond lonely. How I found this site I don't recall. Must have been HP leading the way. I didn't...

rtexas · rtexas

((((Everyone)))) I struggle with this on a daily basis in my personal life. Interesting thing is I am a manager in a large company and I don't have this issue at work. I have the hardest time seperating what "I" want as opposed to deciding which of the expectations of the A's in my life I need to...

purpleraven · purpleraven

one thing my A says most often when we're in any level of disagreement is: "you're holding me emotional hostage." uhh, what? i don't ever know what to say to him, other than "that's not my intention, i don't even think that way." he continues to say it. eventually, i realized, he's saying it about himsel...

marmare · marmare

My tongue may have a hole in it....but inside I feel I did the right thing. My A and I have been dancing the same, very old dance since my mother's funeral. In his mind, he swears I have been here 4 1/2 months...nearly 5! I have been here since June 12th.....I have stuck to my guns...

Texasjoni21 · Texasjoni21

Hey Ya'll, This has been the longest week on earth! I'm back in the library where my hour is ticking away, and OMG do I ever miss my friends in this place! I didn't think it would be this bad, but Mspeewee!, you were right, I'm withdrawing all over the place! I feel like I've fallen off of the face of the ear...

debilyn · debilyn

"normal" for Eden is, animals underfoot, animals sticking their mugs in my way, animals pulling the grain sacks out becuz I forgot to shut the van....lol so letting them from the barn to the front yard is what feels normal! lol I am thinking winter, ug. I really want to f...

DoN4me · DoN4me

Ok all have to ask. LOL, who has tried shushi, I have never tried it but part of my recovery is trying new things. So, I guess I agree to go to do shushi tonight with my friends. I recently started eatting fish. Fished for them for years but never really ate any fish. So figured I will try it. But...

serendipity · serendipity

i am wondering why it is that everyone who loves an a will consider going thru with an intervention for the a but why are there no such things as al-anon interventions. we all know people who could benefit from this program. why is that no one ever gets together and confronts the enablers? i say thi...

Gailey · Gailey

A son finally got a job today!!!! Yeah!!!

DoN4me · DoN4me

Lately I have been feeling alot of pressure from my A to go and see him. But the way I am seeing things lately is why should I go threw all the effort all the time and pay to go to him. I just get so frustrated at times because it feels like I am the one doing all the work. My A is on probation for 2 years and ca...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

(((Hello Family))) Just wanted to share a little excerp from CTC today. "Trying to change other people is futile, foolish, and certainly not loving. Today, instead of assuming that they are the problem, I can look at myself to see what needs changing within". The passage discusses that befor...

princess · princess

Hi everyone, my name is Sherry and I am new to this forum, the online meetings and alanon. I have been in a LTR w/a man for 4 yrs who recently has developed an alcohol abuse problem. Maybe he had it all along, and it was just dormant. Not sure. I am here to recover from the insanity that this problem has...

daisy2 · daisy2

Its sad, but true. I'm still trying to control everything he does. I had an eye opener last night, he had to say it to my face. Last 4 days was hell for him. Every phone call i asked him, where are you, who you with, what time you will be at home etc. I had no idea i was doing that. Than another call, telling me he i...

smokey · smokey

I've got 6 meetings under my belt and I've got such a lighter load than ever before...Why it took me so long to get on the right train, I'll never know! I guess I was too interested in being the manager of the universe..What a sham!!! To anyone who's just starting out, just hang on..It gets be...

lilms · lilms

Obviously still very much a newbie here

What is JADE, have tried figuring it out and all I could come up with is Just Another Drunken Escapade. Shows where my life is I guess. Could someone please help? lilms

marks girl · marks girl

Hello Everyone, My name is Barbara and I am from Tennessee. I am here because my b\f has a drinking problem. He knows he does and is doing something about it. It took some really bad things to happen to make him see his problem. To make a long story short he had a brush wiht the law at a bar where I was t...

Lunamoth · Lunamoth

((((everyone))))) Thanks for your earlier responses. Maria I laughed when I read yours, I haven't been able to get in touch w/ my sponsor, What would she say? "Sure we've all wanted to quit, but we don't." And that would be it, we keep going. However slow, we just do it unti...

JulieLynn · JulieLynn

I am really trying to stay on the right path to recovery. Being able to objectively reread an online journal over the weekend I had from back in Novemeber of 2004 has been a huge step in my recovery. I was able to recognize a pattern between my A and myself. The arguments, him telling m...

Gailey · Gailey

Ever since I can remember my father's Asim has made me feel ashamed and embarrassed. I totally understand why. I did not know it was a disease. Today I have compassion for him. He passed away in 1986. Why do I still feel ashamed of having an A son? I understand it is a disease, I have compassion for him b...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Just wanted to tell you that I'm doing GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEat today! I sent LOTS of emails--including thank you notes to the people who got me out of my dad's house; my advisor; the volunteer co ordinator (for where I do volunteer work!

). And I made phone calls to my Drs to get appts mad...

AlaMom · AlaMom

Shortly after I had my last child I noticed that things about me were changing. At the time I wrote them off as dealing w/ active disease. Things did not seem to resolve the more I worked the program in my life so I went to my doctor. Presented the laundry list of symptoms and was told it...

debilyn · debilyn

I know I am a broken record about this, but I also know the more we talk and get it out, the sooner we heal. Was in town getting feed, (what else, not like I am out getting nails done or a massage...)and when I am in the store, driving there, I feel alone. Just a bit back I was ok again with the aloneness and it w...

Gailey · Gailey

Well here is the cure ... Just smile and say... Dear Lord ... I know you're watching over me And I'm feeling truly blessed For no matter what I pray for You always know what's best!

twinmom2 · twinmom2

(((Hello Group))) Thanks to all for the prayers I am feeling better today. I took some steps even in my pain and a little self-pity to some things for me. I've been exercising now everyday since Sunday. I had to really pray on this one because I was so mad at my A for expressing his un...

Georgia girl · Georgia girl

Someone touched on the disease starting from somthing more deep seated... to quote: I don't think it is a "disease" but a chronic MENTAL problem that is very complex, deep seated, and difficult to treat. I spent years in denial that my husband had a "drinking problem"...I tr...

artygirl · artygirl

I met with my new lawyer today and started divorce proceedings. I have an appointment Friday to sign the paperwork. I am feeling a lot of different feelings today, mostly sad. Sad that I have to leave the man I love because he loves drinking and cocaine more than he loves being with me. Sad that I'll most l...

MaggiG · MaggiG

Hello Everyone, I am asking humbly for prayers for a family that I do not even know. But I know the power of prayer and the power that Alanon prayer has. My Best friend and love was killed in head on collusion 8-17-06 in Boyle , Canada. There were three cars in this crash. The one passing was...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Being stuck/getting unstuck (Preview) A friend of mine who is also in the program has been helping me a lot lately to break my stuff down into small pieces and keep working on those pieces. Normally a holiday with the A around would be a nightmare. If he is not drinking or using he is just a lump stuck in the middle of the TV feeling sorry for...	maresie2	2	450	Sep 5, 2006 by Tiger2006
	brothers courtdate is Tues (Preview) Moms been subpoened to testify Brother living in small apartment, not working, lost his part time job even Mom wants this over and is willing to take brother back in to live at her condo Me? Im detaching (as well as I can) - its a sick sick family	Barbara	2	281	Sep 5, 2006 by Barbara
	thought i was handling things ok... (Preview) I guess this post is more like me needing to just journal in a safe way. So for what it's worth (if you can stand reading a long post), here goes... I'm feeling really confused about what I want out of my life, and what I need from those who are closest to me. I've felt this way probably...	lmt123	3	497	Sep 4, 2006 by peewee
	Surrender...Let Go and Let God (Preview) They say that living in a dysfunctional family changes who you are. I believe that being a member of the Al-anon family can also change who you are. Although I am feeling pretty good right now - as may be reflected in my previous post - I know that this too shall pass (Darn it! I used to...	BeBlessed	3	366	Sep 4, 2006 by beachbaby
	Hi (Preview) Hello everyone, I am new here and new to the Al-anon program. My husband of 13 years just returned from treatment and has been home for 5 days. He has been sober for 36 days and is struggling daily to keep himself on track. He is doing okay but, after tonight I am really starting to wonder how much longer I...	lani	7	412	Sep 4, 2006 by lani
	Every woman..... (Preview) Hope you can say "YES" to all of these!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..one old love she can imagine going back to.. and one who reminds her how far she has come... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..enough money within her c...	daisy2	3	473	Sep 4, 2006 by sallyb
	Son's courtdate (Preview) Hello dear (((((friends))))) My son's sentencing hearing is Tuesday, September 5. I am trusting God for the best outcome, but still have moments of nervousness and anxiety in anticipation. My son has been clean for 18 months now and is doing extremely well in every area of h...	Lexie	5	382	Sep 4, 2006 by mel123
	I Have The Faith (Preview) Hello Dear Friends, Well been getting thru minute by minute right now......The addition has totally taken over the addict once again....I can't worry about that.... So happy I start a new job on Tuesday....that is so great...I am very thankful about that......moving f...	Andrea12	8	455	Sep 4, 2006 by mel123
	Plan B (Preview) I have been going through my stuff all weekend and am part the way through the task of being ready. I think that is some of the issue being ready for what God has in store for me. I oftentimes am not ready. I have been overdue on decluttering and getting rid of stuff for more than a year now.&nbs...	maresie2	4	438	Sep 4, 2006 by Maria123
	more questions (Preview) I feel silly asking more from each of you, but already the response has been overwhelming. Thank you for those that posted a response to my original post. Your ideas, suggestions and empathy have already lifted my heart! I think that I am just so thankful to know that I am not alone a...	WifeinDespair	6	407	Sep 4, 2006 by canadianguy
	trying not to be needy (Preview) my ex just left after spending the day with the kids here at my home. i am feeling so lonlely that i thought about just crawling into his arms. that's pretty low for me. after all he has done and not done to me and for me i know i'm in a bad space to even have that thought in my head. and it's not him. it's me and my f...	serendipity	4	594	Sep 4, 2006 by Zyperiris
	longest time (Preview) HI all. So far it has been 30 hours since I have talked to my A. I know it seems lame to count but it is longest I have ever gone in 5 1/2 years. Yesterday was his family's bbq and I decided not to go to avoid the everyone pretending he's not drinking situation and me crying. I hung up...	daisygrl4	5	333	Sep 4, 2006 by Zyperiris
	Another Day in Hell (Preview) Hello Friends, I am so tired of this damn life.....I feel trapped.....I am sick to death of the life of hell I live.....I am trying so very hard to hang on until hub gets a couple of checks....him being out of work has drained us....now that he is back to work the past couple of days have been a living he...	Andrea12	13	455	Sep 3, 2006 by maresie2
	I need help. stressful day at work, dealing with a 73 yro alcoholic who was forced to quit in Jan. no program, not his idea, he still wants to drink (Preview) Phew! I was so rattled today at work. The 73 yro man I sit with was hell bent determined to drive his truck into town and buy his liquor. It was said he used to drink the biggest bottle of liquor a day. I saw an empty bottle of vodka when I first started working. I started in the end of March. His...	hmrnrnmm	7	414	Sep 3, 2006 by isabela40
	Alot of Changes Since Turning It Over (Preview) I must say that since I turned my will and life over to the care of God, my life has changed a great deal. Through the fellowship of Al-anon and working the steps I have learned to ask myself question like… 1. what is going on with me? 2. what hurts? 3. what feels good? 4. what do I want? 5. what do I need? 6...	BeBlessed	3	459	Sep 3, 2006 by Diva
	Thank you for your warm welcome (Preview) Hello, Thank you for your warm welcome. I really needed that. Im looking forward to hearing from you and chating with you. Im so anxious to get started with the steps and traditions. I have been to several local meetings. Im a cocktail waitress and I have such anxiety speaking in public. I know this so...	hunnydoll	3	342	Sep 3, 2006 by Maria123
	So Sad & Frustrated,,,,,what to do? (Preview) Hello,,,,,hoping you are all doing the best you are able to right now. I am writing in hopes that some of you wise and learned people may be able to offer me somethings I can try with my very alcoholic Father. I can't just ask him not to drink as much as he does, and certainly asking him and expe...	Leah	4	807	Sep 3, 2006 by Andrea12
	convincing mom to attend alanon (Preview) hi everyone, my stepdad is a recently-diagnosed alcoholic. my mom was very dependant on him for many years until his condition worsened. then their roles reversed - she took over all aspects of their lives - managing bills, health & work issues etc. unfortunately, recently m...	son_of_a	4	493	Sep 3, 2006 by isabela40
	I need to really listen to those voices.... (Preview) I have to tell you it is like a light went on inside my head. I think I get it!!!! Tonight my A called on his way home. He is so upset, he has had a lead on a jobsite that has been okaying extra breaks, early outs, on company time. It's a temporary jobsite for my A, but he worked for this compa...	marmare	2	394	Sep 3, 2006 by Christy
	BALLGAME NIGHT (Preview) hELLO EVERYONE, I Need some advice. I have heard my A talking about a ballgame taking place this weekend. I have heard conversations about a bonfire and a party. This will take place outside. They will watch or listen to the ballgame in his shop, but they will be getting drunk.&n...	bluebjade	2	292	Sep 2, 2006 by lin0606
	song lyrics "home" how true! maybe you can relate too (Preview) I heard this song in the middle of all the crap last nite. It was so true except the part of being stoned. I don't do that anymore. (rock ) It sucks to feel you live alone when you don't. THREE DAYS GRACE LYRICS "Home" I’ll be coming home Just to be alone Cause I know you’re n...	hmrnrnmm	1	1036	Sep 2, 2006 by kismetstrand
	Talking the talk is one thing... (Preview) Walking the walk, quite another. I read time and time again that we do not have to allow the behavior of the A to affect our moods. And that only WE are responsible for how we respond to the A's condition. NOTHING and NO ONE can make us feel sad, confused, hurt, angry, frustrated, miserable, or alone....	Diva	7	808	Sep 2, 2006 by isabela40
	The courage to look at myself... (Preview) Hi friends, I started back to work last week. It has been hectic ever since. I am having to make alot of adjustments because my facility is being renovated. Also, we have to add another class to make our workload. I am on the run, tired, and frustrated. So in a week and a half I have already embarassed a st...	nmike	3	342	Sep 2, 2006 by Maria123
	Questioning Leaving (Preview) I have worked hard this week trying to put thing into order for me to leave my AH. I felt that was best for both of us. . I was sure that I was making the right move. Then..........it seems like doors started to close. I had 3 people who have many years in Al-Anon tell me the program...	Gramma Pat	8	424	Sep 2, 2006 by Maria123
	PERSONAL POWER: Quotes (Preview) Personal Power “The deep root of failure in our lives is to think, ‘Oh how useless and powerless I am.’ It is essential to think strongly and forcefully, ‘I can do it,’ without boasting or fretting.” -- Dalai Lama Angeles Arrien says that whether we are male or female, we need to develop three kin...	Lani	1	307	Sep 2, 2006 by Maria123
	Back from Family week (Preview) Well, I made it. I fret about it before going, I got physically ill while there, but I made it through family week. for those of you out there that have had the experience maybe you will understand. For those of you that have not had the experience I wanted to share some of my experienc...	curious	3	352	Sep 2, 2006 by Maria123
	My feet are not set in cement! (Preview) (((Everyone))) I posted earlier about a delima I was having about helping my in-laws move. Well you offered me some wonderful words, which I didn't read until it was too late. <sigh> I did what I thought was right. Called my in-laws and asked if they wanted my help and as...	rtexas	4	497	Sep 2, 2006 by Maria123
	well the a went out tonite (Preview) my a husband went out tonite,just left about 20 min ago and it is only 7 at nite..he wanted me to drive him to the bar,but i said no told him to just go,i will pick the car up later..he said for me to come down around 9 to be with him,told him i dont like bars,he says but you like karao...	bev	2	391	Sep 2, 2006 by Maria123
	Update (Preview) Two weeks ago, I told my AH that we couldn't have a relationship 'til he started some real recovery. He has his own place now, and comes by to visit our two year old occasionally. He doesn't show up very often now that I've told him he doesn't have responsibility at our home as an excuse for drinking. My the...	ohera101	3	301	Sep 2, 2006 by Maria123
	tp the people I am sending books to (Preview) I still have addresses. Just been so sick, well now, and am poor now.lol but will get them off to you. I did not forget. love,debilyn	debilyn	0	330	Sep 2, 2006 by debilyn
	A letter to the A? (Preview) Hello All... If you've been keeping up, I'm in the process of filing for divorce from my A/cocaine-addicted husband. He doesn't know my plan... yet. I was thinking about writing him a letter. He's very hard to communicate with (imagine that!) and avoids conversation with me lately. I would li...	artygirl	6	413	Sep 2, 2006 by debilyn
	CAN I AVOID BLAMING OTHERS AND "TRY" TO IMPROVE MY OWN CIRCUMSTANCES? (Preview) For years I blamed the A's in my life for whatever "I" was feeling that day. If he wouldnt have done this or that, I wouldnt be feeling this way today etc. If my sadness/worry/anger would flare up it would be due to his actions. I would isolate from friends and family, I would sit at home and cry, sink into th...	gardengal	5	687	Sep 1, 2006 by serendipity
	Emotions Run Amuck.... (Preview) Hi everyone.... What a nutty time this is. I can’t believe one can feel so many emotions at once. Now AH feels horrible after this week, being drunk all the time, threatening to have his car repossessed, the mortgage behind, me finding out about the phone calls wit...	hersh	3	452	Sep 1, 2006 by Jill
	Alanon anniversayr (Preview) (((((((((((((Family)))))))))), Well it is now officially my Alanon 1 year anniversary. I came here exactly one year ago, afraid, unsure, confused, shy and beyond lonely. How I found this site I don't recall. Must have been HP leading the way. I didn't...	Karilynn	9	395	Sep 1, 2006 by tea2
	So hard to know my own mind... (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) I struggle with this on a daily basis in my personal life. Interesting thing is I am a manager in a large company and I don't have this issue at work. I have the hardest time seperating what "I" want as opposed to deciding which of the expectations of the A's in my life I need to...	rtexas	6	435	Sep 1, 2006 by Jennifer
	emotional hostages? (Preview) one thing my A says most often when we're in any level of disagreement is: "you're holding me emotional hostage." uhh, what? i don't ever know what to say to him, other than "that's not my intention, i don't even think that way." he continues to say it. eventually, i realized, he's saying it about himsel...	purpleraven	7	3827	Sep 1, 2006 by purpleraven
	Voices in my head & My tongue may have a hole.... (Preview) My tongue may have a hole in it....but inside I feel I did the right thing. My A and I have been dancing the same, very old dance since my mother's funeral. In his mind, he swears I have been here 4 1/2 months...nearly 5! I have been here since June 12th.....I have stuck to my guns...	marmare	2	469	Sep 1, 2006 by david62
	This has been one long week! (Preview) Hey Ya'll, This has been the longest week on earth! I'm back in the library where my hour is ticking away, and OMG do I ever miss my friends in this place! I didn't think it would be this bad, but Mspeewee!, you were right, I'm withdrawing all over the place! I feel like I've fallen off of the face of the ear...	Texasjoni21	5	476	Sep 1, 2006 by Karilynn
	feeling better (Preview) "normal" for Eden is, animals underfoot, animals sticking their mugs in my way, animals pulling the grain sacks out becuz I forgot to shut the van....lol so letting them from the barn to the front yard is what feels normal! lol I am thinking winter, ug. I really want to f...	debilyn	7	355	Sep 1, 2006 by bluebjade
	Shushi (Preview) Ok all have to ask. LOL, who has tried shushi, I have never tried it but part of my recovery is trying new things. So, I guess I agree to go to do shushi tonight with my friends. I recently started eatting fish. Fished for them for years but never really ate any fish. So figured I will try it. But...	DoN4me	9	569	Aug 31, 2006 by Karilynn
	al-anon intervention (Preview) i am wondering why it is that everyone who loves an a will consider going thru with an intervention for the a but why are there no such things as al-anon interventions. we all know people who could benefit from this program. why is that no one ever gets together and confronts the enablers? i say thi...	serendipity	4	457	Aug 31, 2006 by lin0606
	Prayer is powerful!!! (Preview) A son finally got a job today!!!! Yeah!!!	Gailey	2	321	Aug 31, 2006 by Karilynn
	Pressure (Preview) Lately I have been feeling alot of pressure from my A to go and see him. But the way I am seeing things lately is why should I go threw all the effort all the time and pay to go to him. I just get so frustrated at times because it feels like I am the one doing all the work. My A is on probation for 2 years and ca...	DoN4me	3	300	Aug 31, 2006 by nmike
	Today's Courage To Change (Preview) (((Hello Family))) Just wanted to share a little excerp from CTC today. "Trying to change other people is futile, foolish, and certainly not loving. Today, instead of assuming that they are the problem, I can look at myself to see what needs changing within". The passage discusses that befor...	twinmom2	3	507	Aug 31, 2006 by drucilla06
	New and need support (Preview) Hi everyone, my name is Sherry and I am new to this forum, the online meetings and alanon. I have been in a LTR w/a man for 4 yrs who recently has developed an alcohol abuse problem. Maybe he had it all along, and it was just dormant. Not sure. I am here to recover from the insanity that this problem has...	princess	5	493	Aug 31, 2006 by lin0606
	I still control his life (Preview) Its sad, but true. I'm still trying to control everything he does. I had an eye opener last night, he had to say it to my face. Last 4 days was hell for him. Every phone call i asked him, where are you, who you with, what time you will be at home etc. I had no idea i was doing that. Than another call, telling me he i...	daisy2	11	407	Aug 31, 2006 by lin0606
	Thankful (Preview) I've got 6 meetings under my belt and I've got such a lighter load than ever before...Why it took me so long to get on the right train, I'll never know! I guess I was too interested in being the manager of the universe..What a sham!!! To anyone who's just starting out, just hang on..It gets be...	smokey	3	369	Aug 31, 2006 by Karilynn
	what is JADE? (Preview) Obviously still very much a newbie here What is JADE, have tried figuring it out and all I could come up with is Just Another Drunken Escapade. Shows where my life is I guess. Could someone please help? lilms	lilms	3	425	Aug 31, 2006 by Karilynn
	hello (Preview) Hello Everyone, My name is Barbara and I am from Tennessee. I am here because my b\f has a drinking problem. He knows he does and is doing something about it. It took some really bad things to happen to make him see his problem. To make a long story short he had a brush wiht the law at a bar where I was t...	marks girl	5	324	Aug 31, 2006 by marks girl
	Not quitting yet (Preview) ((((everyone))))) Thanks for your earlier responses. Maria I laughed when I read yours, I haven't been able to get in touch w/ my sponsor, What would she say? "Sure we've all wanted to quit, but we don't." And that would be it, we keep going. However slow, we just do it unti...	Lunamoth	2	357	Aug 31, 2006 by abbyal
	My Road to Recovery (Preview) I am really trying to stay on the right path to recovery. Being able to objectively reread an online journal over the weekend I had from back in Novemeber of 2004 has been a huge step in my recovery. I was able to recognize a pattern between my A and myself. The arguments, him telling m...	JulieLynn	3	340	Aug 30, 2006 by Andrea12
	shame (Preview) Ever since I can remember my father's Asim has made me feel ashamed and embarrassed. I totally understand why. I did not know it was a disease. Today I have compassion for him. He passed away in 1986. Why do I still feel ashamed of having an A son? I understand it is a disease, I have compassion for him b...	Gailey	3	351	Aug 30, 2006 by omajoy
	Proud Tiger On the Prowl! (Preview) Just wanted to tell you that I'm doing GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEat today! I sent LOTS of emails--including thank you notes to the people who got me out of my dad's house; my advisor; the volunteer co ordinator (for where I do volunteer work! ). And I made phone calls to my Drs to get appts mad...	Tiger2006	7	510	Aug 30, 2006 by buzzfree
	Finally some answers... (Preview) Shortly after I had my last child I noticed that things about me were changing. At the time I wrote them off as dealing w/ active disease. Things did not seem to resolve the more I worked the program in my life so I went to my doctor. Presented the laundry list of symptoms and was told it...	AlaMom	3	344	Aug 30, 2006 by Maria123
	tuesday (Preview) I know I am a broken record about this, but I also know the more we talk and get it out, the sooner we heal. Was in town getting feed, (what else, not like I am out getting nails done or a massage...)and when I am in the store, driving there, I feel alone. Just a bit back I was ok again with the aloneness and it w...	debilyn	4	360	Aug 30, 2006 by maresie2
	Ever feel like you're losing your marbles? (Preview) Well here is the cure ... Just smile and say... Dear Lord ... I know you're watching over me And I'm feeling truly blessed For no matter what I pray for You always know what's best!	Gailey	4	388	Aug 30, 2006 by nikkilou
	Taking steps to healthy living (Preview) (((Hello Group))) Thanks to all for the prayers I am feeling better today. I took some steps even in my pain and a little self-pity to some things for me. I've been exercising now everyday since Sunday. I had to really pray on this one because I was so mad at my A for expressing his un...	twinmom2	2	363	Aug 30, 2006 by lin0606
	Disesase or Mental Problem?? (Preview) Someone touched on the disease starting from somthing more deep seated... to quote: I don't think it is a "disease" but a chronic MENTAL problem that is very complex, deep seated, and difficult to treat. I spent years in denial that my husband had a "drinking problem"...I tr...	Georgia girl	4	504	Aug 30, 2006 by twinmom2
	mixed emotions (Preview) I met with my new lawyer today and started divorce proceedings. I have an appointment Friday to sign the paperwork. I am feeling a lot of different feelings today, mostly sad. Sad that I have to leave the man I love because he loves drinking and cocaine more than he loves being with me. Sad that I'll most l...	artygirl	4	318	Aug 30, 2006 by hersh
	prayers (Preview) Hello Everyone, I am asking humbly for prayers for a family that I do not even know. But I know the power of prayer and the power that Alanon prayer has. My Best friend and love was killed in head on collusion 8-17-06 in Boyle , Canada. There were three cars in this crash. The one passing was...	MaggiG	4	318	Aug 30, 2006 by hersh
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.