Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

tenacious · tenacious

Hello everyone, First of all, let me tell you how glad I am to have found this site. This is all very new for me and was recommended to me by a good friend who has been to Al-Anon herself (her husband went through AA) and found it very helpful. They are still together and happy. Alcohol has been an increasi...

maire rua · maire rua

Hi All, My student contacted me late this week. I had given her an extension on work due as she cited difficulties. I made an appointment to see her the week after next and the times are difficult for her. However to see her asap, I chose to choose the times. She tried to lay a guilt trip on me and I decided to c...

ddub · ddub

My AH is a jerk tonight and we did try to talk off and on the last couple days until he became smug, belligerant and immature. I told him I had several things to talk with him during this quiet weekend. We've had a about 15 minute conversation 3 times over the last 2 days. Taking it slow, concise without t...

barisax · barisax

As some of you know, I backed into this program - I was born qualified for Alanon, but had to qualify fully for Alcoholics Anonymous first, and get sober, before finally showing up for Alanon to begin dealing with my own codependency issues... although I have never been married to an alcoholic, I've ha...

Belladay · Belladay

I am such a procrastinator! I have a test (self study 2 months) next Friday and I need to really study all day but I can't seem to focus. I feel like I need to just relax today and take some time off but I know I need to reread the book which is 600 pages. Yikes! But I do have a friend coming over to study with me. Sh...

dm0141 · dm0141

I posted last week when my husband took some medicine that belonged to my son for ADD. I try to keep it put up when he is home (out of respect for his addiction), but he came home early (usually gone for 2 weeks and home for 1 week from working offshore). I put the medicine up, but not in time. I knew he had ta...

verenda · verenda

I need to know something. Because we have alcoholics in our lives, does this mean that we are supposed to arrange our lives according to their disease, and base our decisions on whether or not they could influence the A to drink? It seems that this is being done among some of the members of my Alanon grou...

Belladay · Belladay

I had the oddest experience today. I was at work and I am studying with 3 other women I work with for this big test we will have next week. It is a 2 month self-study and it is by choice so we are taking this on ourselves. We have all been working hard to get this done and I am sure some of it was stress but one of the...

newday · newday

My ex-A and I have been broken up for about a year, after 7 years of dating/co-habitating. I am realistic about the relationship and the fact it will never work as long as he is sick. I am 42 with a great career, 2 awesome kids and a pretty happy life. My ex-A is not so lucky, but his choice.The thing is I sti...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

what do you guys say when people ask how your alcoholic is? He and I no longer live together but we may reconcile. I have come to a point where I will no longer go into it when friends/family ask about our relationship and how I am doing. In the past I would SIGH and say something like..."its OK or its...

PURRCEY · PURRCEY

I just asked told the Love of my life to get out - I know he needs help but I can not take his drinking anymore. He keeps justifing his drinking by telling me he never hurt me and he is a good provider. He is right on one count - He is an excelent provider and he has never hit me when he drinks but I can not make h...

leo · leo

Note to my husband, You are making a choice about our marriage by choosing to drink bourbon again. I then have the right to choose whether I endure another round of the consequences and effect on me. Please do not try to talk to me I am too upset this is a boundary to protect myself. Leo

Jeff Reynolds · Jeff Reynolds

I've learned a gret deal lurking in this forum and reading the collective wisdom found here, thank-you. Here's another question I have: How do you handle the lying aspects of someone who is an A? Relationships are built on trust and of course A destroys that trust when the A is in relapse or freshly out o...

Belladay · Belladay

Leo, I am sorry you are going through this again. I know how you feel. I finally left my AH but he had gotten alot worse and acted out in really bad ways before I left. It is so hard to deal with it. I stayed 5 years after he relapsed. I was in literal hell before I left. I am so glad I got the courage up to do it. He wa...

Chetch · Chetch

Here I am again. My husband is still sober, but was in an automobile accident a few weeks ago and told me that a truck had run a stop sign and hit him. He went to the hospital with neck and shoulder injuries that seemed to heal remarkably fast. Last night he presents me with the police report showing that...

shellymcknight · shellymcknight

I got a call yesterday from my A. I do still love him and someone said it sounded like I wasn't done with him. They were so right. He told me how much he loves me and that he doesn't want to be without me but isn't ready to give up alcohol. He said he needed to do it for himself and that it had to be his decision...

Kim65 · Kim65

I hit rock bottom (and then some) in my checking account. It's all gone, the farm money, whatever it was, it's gone now, sort of the end of an era, I guess. Thankfully I just got my retirement fund check from my previous job, only 1500 bucks, but it looks like a lot to me right now. My plan was to deposit so...

ddub · ddub

First I was going to start a new topic related to Carolina's post about thinking and our kids. Like when one of mine told me not to blame it all on my AH when I answered questions from the younger siblings because I was sick first. I said what?!? Sort of a chicken and egg story - yes I was undiagnosed for...

Belladay · Belladay

Hi everyone, I just wanted you to know that I have found since I have been on this site that I have started thinking about you all, your words, your suffering and your comfort. It has made me want to come back and read up on how each of you are doing. You are becoming so interesting to me. I also feel part of you...

Heaven · Heaven

I'm just beginning with this but I'm pretty sure my husband has been an alcoholic for the entire 20 years we've been married. He started having serious temper tantrums about two months ago and he started drinking more often about two weeks ago. I can't go to meetings yet. This website has gotten me t...

Peggy7 · Peggy7

Keep The Fork....... There was a young woman who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and had been given three months to live So as she was getting her things "in order," she contacted her Pastor and had him come to her house to discuss certain aspects of her final wishes. She told him...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I was in the car on my way to work and I was thinking about myself and realized some things. Firstly I realized that I have not been being the best mom I could be. I was always better than the A (which isn't saying much) but is that really enough? No, I decided, it's not. I can do better with this teenage da...

Belladay · Belladay

Hi everyone. I went out with my neighbors last night and it was fun to give out candy, block style. But does everyone drink? I have been away from it for so long I think I forgot. I just don't associate with people who drink much anymore and seeing these people, who I don't really spend that much time with, w...

Heartbroken · Heartbroken

become a veteran member, I have only been with you a few short weeks. How scarey is THAT! Heartbroken

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

It's a simple formula; do your best and somebody might like it. --Dorothy Baker We're never guaranteed success by others' standards. However, if we do our best according to the standards we think God has in mind, we'll be successful. And from God we'll always receive unconditional love and acceptan...

maresie2 · maresie2

As you all know I am deeply in debt after living with the A for 7 years. I left him with practically nothing and he destroyed the only thing I had of value which was my truck which I was never able to recvoer despite my best efforts in getting a restraining order. . I have been working solidly for 6 months now b...

Loupiness · Loupiness

... that "when you get busy you get better", my ah should be on the fast track to recovery. HA! So, with the diversion program he must attend 90 AA meetings in 90 days (over the holidays,should be interesting), a professionals group twice per wk, have a psych eval, weekly counseling by a re...

babysteps · babysteps

AH was supposed to be running to the corner store about a 1/4 mile from home last night. He comes home almost an hour later shaking. He got pulled over and he had been drinking. The cop asked if he had been drinking, he said no, but cop said he smelled alcohol. Didn't have his license with him of course. Cop r...

verenda · verenda

Well I decided to let AH come home. He has been home 2 days now. How am I feeling? I really do not know. I thought I would be ecstatically happy, like just getting married, or something, but I just feel sort of numb. I love him, and when we were seeing eadh other and he was at the halfway house we were ecstatic,...

maresie2 · maresie2

After an incredibly difficult year full of lows, new lows, frustration, struggles and more, I find it hard to be at a place of acceptance. I konw this is for me the core of my program. When I was struggling with how to cope with the A acceptance was far from my grasp. I raged, grieved, raged, grieved and rag...

david62 · david62

Hello ((((Family))) As the new chairperson for the group, it is my pleasure to chair our business meetings for the next 6 months. This Sunday is the first Sunday of the month so we should have had our business meeting for November. However!!!!!! This weekend I am going to be traveling to Houston to atte...

Belladay · Belladay

I just wanted to tell you that this has been a good day. I feel aware and pretty balanced. I have come home and cooked for two nights, something that I really like to do because it is such a form of love to give my family. In recovery I found nuggets of balance and I love it when I have it. Like starting somethin...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((((((Family)))))), Just got some bad news that my cousin (who is my sister's age) died today. He was a deep sea diver working on pipes, etc. Apparently something went wrong with his equipment and he never surfaced. He was working out west, so I have no idea when the funeral will be. He died doing w...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((((Family)))))))), Just wanted to take the time to wish you all a Happy Halloween. I hope tomorrow will be filled with love, laughter and fun. Enjoy all the ghosts and goblins and creatures running amok. Hubby and Pipers Kitty will be handing out treats, while I go for my walk in my neighbor...

Belladay · Belladay

Hi guys, all is well. My dad did call finally today and I am ok. He seemed really insecure. I think I feel stronger because of you all. I just thought I am not going to worry, I will put up some boundaries like you said and remember who I am and how far I have come. He seemed so nervous. Here he is 2000 miles away a...

Aslan · Aslan

I'm not sure where to begin this so I'll start at the beginning of the end. Hope it all makes sense....... My father is an alcoholic. The drinking worsened when I left for college, and by the time I had graduated from school and begun planning my wedding he was at the point where he was comatose for days on e...

CJC · CJC

So last night the AH decided to come home, I was cleaning the kitchen after the mess the kids made and went to put the trash in the garage. Well, apparently somewhere in the middle of this I had supposedly said something that set AH off, because he came into the garage, closed the door, and proceeded to sta...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Last night was hell night. I got home from work, picked up the little ones from daycare and then went to pick up the oldest at her school dance. We got home after grocery shopping and I told her to fold clothes and do the rest of her chores. That's where it all started... She started complaining and I to...

justmeagain · justmeagain

Just two weeks ago I had what I thought was a somewhat normal life, just what I thought I suppose. I am so hurt, scared, confused and so many mixed feelings right now I don't even know what to do. My fiance and I split, two weeks tomorrow. He has been seen by me with another woman, called his mother to tell he...

maire rua · maire rua

Dear All, Yesterday evening I was at the funeral of a 29 year old man from the community I grew up in. He crashed his jeep on saturday night while intoxicated and died at the scene. It was his seventh vehicle. A taxi had been organised by his brother but he just couldn't wait as he had things to do in the morni...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

((((Family))))), I have my friends pc up and running until my boss has my tower up :). Just wanted to let you all know. Yours in recovery, Mandy

chick29 · chick29

I'm currently in a relationship with a recovering alcoholic and have been for about four years. On and off I have been to face to face meetings in England but I am so busy with work and my degree I barely have time to go. However having discvered this site it seems like a god send I'm very interested in doing...

maresie2 · maresie2

I had this epiphany this morning that Al anon has given me the gift of being known. I sought that in depth in counselling and never really got it. I had a sense of it but I think I held back. I've been in these rooms for over 2 years now. I came here a basket case, totally paralyzed in depression. I am certinly n...

Friendofyours · Friendofyours

She had a rare thyroid cancer and she's been fighting it tooth and nail. But she woke up today and her left side started to swell this morning and then her right (signs of organ failure) My brother is with her and picked her up and carried her to the restroom. She refuses to eat, or take her pain meds, she sai...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Got a call from mom that blew me away tonight. She had a theory: I had made it all up. I had made up all the things I've shared here with you, with my councelor, with my sponsorship family, with my closest friends. I had made up this theory so that my parents would not cut me off financially, and that I would co...

canadianguy · canadianguy

Hi group... Please refrain from using religion or other groupings that may have others feel like they may be judged and/or not included on the basis of their beliefs. Although this board is not formal "Al-Anon", we do, in fact, welcome everyone from every walk of life, and it is inapprop...

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

Hi, this is just a little victory for me. My working environment is not the best for a recovering codependant like myself. I'm always trying to make everyone happy with me all the time and failing miserably. Someone was giving me a hard time at work and I just put up with it a dealt with it and turned the oth...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello (((All))), Thank you so very much for the wonderful responses. I have no doubt there were many prayers coming my way these past days. Things are a little bettter, for one day at least. I will just take it no questions. As far as the g-child, I can only be here, help and love. Life can be a wonderfu...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I haven't had much to say lately, I am past the point of hoping he'll get better and we can still have a happily ever after ending. I just wonder sometimes if I am getting on with my life or if this is just a holding pattern until? Until what I don't know, until I get totally better and feel able to trust anoth...

Jeff Reynolds · Jeff Reynolds

Our A is 25 and been battling it for 2 1/2 years, since she finished college. Two stints in rehab in FL, four lost jobs, 14 days in jail, one DWI, and over six different half-way houses and apartments. Five relapses, they average about every six months or so but tend to only last a couple of days because sh...

Heartbroken · Heartbroken

No matter what I do I cannot enter the chat room and I thought it would be a good idea to go in to sit and listen and become a little more involved since it is NOT possible for me to go to f2f meetings. I have downloaded the software as directed but if I click on the link in John's chatroom information sticky I si...

souljoy · souljoy

my AH decided to "discuss" with me some things. For the life of me I can't even remember what it was. It does not matter because it always ends up in an attempt to verbally abuse me. I get up and walk away and tell him I am not going there. I lay down to go to sleep and he follows me. It's always my faul...

chick29 · chick29

I have been with my partner for around four years in this time he has cheated several times, lied been manipulative and every time I have allowed him to talk me round because of my own unhealthy behaviour patterns. I have attended al anon on and off which has been very helpful, he has also self harmed and a...

Belladay · Belladay

My last post explained how my dad called after a year and it was pretty freaky to say the least. I really didn't expect to hear from him again. He is my AD I guess, as apposed to AH I see you guys use. He is very ill emotionally. He can be very inappropriate even being long distance, which he has been for the las...

nmike · nmike

Hi Alanon Friends, This is sort been a reflective day for me. I turned 58. I always have a nice day on my birthday. Friends have called. Some of my family has called. I made a cake and my girlfriends came by and we laughed. Two out of three sons called. It is like some of the pieces of the recovery puzzle have c...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi all, Still no tower at home. My boss didn't get a chance to work on it this weekend, but hey he is helping me out and for free, so that is a huge blessing. :) I will be back soon. I do have a tower I borrowed from a friend before this other tower came up so I may see if it works tonight, but since it is borrowed I h...

maresie2 · maresie2

The holidays are almost on us and they are the time I had the worst time with the A. Last year on Thanskgiiving in my normal over reactive mode I struggled to make a huge feast for him. He went out got stoned, drugged whatever and couldn't even stand up. Yet somehow it was important to him that I spend weeks s...

CJC · CJC

I'm not sure how to start this one, I've got a ton of thoughts running through my head, so if I start jumping around and not making sense...I'm sorry. :) My AH hasn't been home in nearly 2 weeks, his drinking has spiraled out of control. It is now to the point that he will walk to the bar, walk back to his place...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello All, Well, let's see, I have lost my husband, children lost a father, my son lost his best friend a few weeks ago, he was like one of my own...he lived here most of the time. Financially devistated, Social Security owes me close to 10,000.00 said around 30 more days. My daughter who is only 17 just...

ddub · ddub

I hoped that I would recover more quickly than I have heard possible but I keep seeing again and again, how or why it takes time. When I was in denial, protecting my AH of consequences & not expressing any anger ad nauseum; the resulting therapies for children, marital, family etc I figgured had me a...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Hi, I'm new. I have a question. :) (Preview) Hello everyone, First of all, let me tell you how glad I am to have found this site. This is all very new for me and was recommended to me by a good friend who has been to Al-Anon herself (her husband went through AA) and found it very helpful. They are still together and happy. Alcohol has been an increasi...	tenacious	5	753	Nov 4, 2007 by nmike
	re: manipulative people (Preview) Hi All, My student contacted me late this week. I had given her an extension on work due as she cited difficulties. I made an appointment to see her the week after next and the times are difficult for her. However to see her asap, I chose to choose the times. She tried to lay a guilt trip on me and I decided to c...	maire rua	2	1554	Nov 4, 2007 by nmike
	Reality check - (Preview) My AH is a jerk tonight and we did try to talk off and on the last couple days until he became smug, belligerant and immature. I told him I had several things to talk with him during this quiet weekend. We've had a about 15 minute conversation 3 times over the last 2 days. Taking it slow, concise without t...	ddub	6	528	Nov 4, 2007 by nmike
	Alanons Who Drink (Preview) As some of you know, I backed into this program - I was born qualified for Alanon, but had to qualify fully for Alcoholics Anonymous first, and get sober, before finally showing up for Alanon to begin dealing with my own codependency issues... although I have never been married to an alcoholic, I've ha...	barisax	5	757	Nov 4, 2007 by abbyal
	Procrastinate (Preview) I am such a procrastinator! I have a test (self study 2 months) next Friday and I need to really study all day but I can't seem to focus. I feel like I need to just relax today and take some time off but I know I need to reread the book which is 600 pages. Yikes! But I do have a friend coming over to study with me. Sh...	Belladay	2	441	Nov 3, 2007 by Belladay
	Finally some honesty from A...... (Preview) I posted last week when my husband took some medicine that belonged to my son for ADD. I try to keep it put up when he is home (out of respect for his addiction), but he came home early (usually gone for 2 weeks and home for 1 week from working offshore). I put the medicine up, but not in time. I knew he had ta...	dm0141	5	641	Nov 3, 2007 by lin0606
	How do I handle this... (Preview) I need to know something. Because we have alcoholics in our lives, does this mean that we are supposed to arrange our lives according to their disease, and base our decisions on whether or not they could influence the A to drink? It seems that this is being done among some of the members of my Alanon grou...	verenda	11	792	Nov 3, 2007 by getoverit
	Shaking My Head (Preview) I had the oddest experience today. I was at work and I am studying with 3 other women I work with for this big test we will have next week. It is a 2 month self-study and it is by choice so we are taking this on ourselves. We have all been working hard to get this done and I am sure some of it was stress but one of the...	Belladay	3	455	Nov 3, 2007 by Jen
	Relationship w/ A vs. Controlling Mom (Preview) My ex-A and I have been broken up for about a year, after 7 years of dating/co-habitating. I am realistic about the relationship and the fact it will never work as long as he is sick. I am 42 with a great career, 2 awesome kids and a pretty happy life. My ex-A is not so lucky, but his choice.The thing is I sti...	newday	2	572	Nov 3, 2007 by Jen
	"...and how is A doing?" (Preview) what do you guys say when people ask how your alcoholic is? He and I no longer live together but we may reconcile. I have come to a point where I will no longer go into it when friends/family ask about our relationship and how I am doing. In the past I would SIGH and say something like..."its OK or its...	Jean4444	10	1460	Nov 2, 2007 by leo
	WHAT DO I DO NOW? (Preview) I just asked told the Love of my life to get out - I know he needs help but I can not take his drinking anymore. He keeps justifing his drinking by telling me he never hurt me and he is a good provider. He is right on one count - He is an excelent provider and he has never hit me when he drinks but I can not make h...	PURRCEY	17	819	Nov 2, 2007 by Sograteful
	strength within (Preview) Note to my husband, You are making a choice about our marriage by choosing to drink bourbon again. I then have the right to choose whether I endure another round of the consequences and effect on me. Please do not try to talk to me I am too upset this is a boundary to protect myself. Leo	leo	3	367	Nov 2, 2007 by Belladay
	Overcoming the Lingering Effects of Lies... (Preview) I've learned a gret deal lurking in this forum and reading the collective wisdom found here, thank-you. Here's another question I have: How do you handle the lying aspects of someone who is an A? Relationships are built on trust and of course A destroys that trust when the A is in relapse or freshly out o...	Jeff Reynolds	6	905	Nov 2, 2007 by Tenderheartsks
	Understand (Preview) Leo, I am sorry you are going through this again. I know how you feel. I finally left my AH but he had gotten alot worse and acted out in really bad ways before I left. It is so hard to deal with it. I stayed 5 years after he relapsed. I was in literal hell before I left. I am so glad I got the courage up to do it. He wa...	Belladay	0	359	Nov 2, 2007 by Belladay
	Husband still sober, but confessed he had gotten a DUI (Preview) Here I am again. My husband is still sober, but was in an automobile accident a few weeks ago and told me that a truck had run a stop sign and hit him. He went to the hospital with neck and shoulder injuries that seemed to heal remarkably fast. Last night he presents me with the police report showing that...	Chetch	10	707	Nov 2, 2007 by Chetch
	Back Again?!?! (Preview) I got a call yesterday from my A. I do still love him and someone said it sounded like I wasn't done with him. They were so right. He told me how much he loves me and that he doesn't want to be without me but isn't ready to give up alcohol. He said he needed to do it for himself and that it had to be his decision...	shellymcknight	3	406	Nov 2, 2007 by Christy
	Must share this . . . (Preview) I hit rock bottom (and then some) in my checking account. It's all gone, the farm money, whatever it was, it's gone now, sort of the end of an era, I guess. Thankfully I just got my retirement fund check from my previous job, only 1500 bucks, but it looks like a lot to me right now. My plan was to deposit so...	Kim65	11	676	Nov 2, 2007 by Jean4444
	doing it again...... (Preview) First I was going to start a new topic related to Carolina's post about thinking and our kids. Like when one of mine told me not to blame it all on my AH when I answered questions from the younger siblings because I was sick first. I said what?!? Sort of a chicken and egg story - yes I was undiagnosed for...	ddub	2	576	Nov 2, 2007 by david62
	Carry you with me (Preview) Hi everyone, I just wanted you to know that I have found since I have been on this site that I have started thinking about you all, your words, your suffering and your comfort. It has made me want to come back and read up on how each of you are doing. You are becoming so interesting to me. I also feel part of you...	Belladay	1	540	Nov 2, 2007 by rtexas
	Just realizing there is a problem... (Preview) I'm just beginning with this but I'm pretty sure my husband has been an alcoholic for the entire 20 years we've been married. He started having serious temper tantrums about two months ago and he started drinking more often about two weeks ago. I can't go to meetings yet. This website has gotten me t...	Heaven	1	540	Nov 2, 2007 by rtexas
	Keep The Fork..... (Preview) Keep The Fork....... There was a young woman who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and had been given three months to live So as she was getting her things "in order," she contacted her Pastor and had him come to her house to discuss certain aspects of her final wishes. She told him...	Peggy7	2	597	Nov 2, 2007 by Karilynn
	I was thinking this morning (shocker I know) LOL (Preview) I was in the car on my way to work and I was thinking about myself and realized some things. Firstly I realized that I have not been being the best mom I could be. I was always better than the A (which isn't saying much) but is that really enough? No, I decided, it's not. I can do better with this teenage da...	carolinagirl	10	715	Nov 2, 2007 by Jean4444
	RE: A Drink or Candy (Preview) Hi everyone. I went out with my neighbors last night and it was fun to give out candy, block style. But does everyone drink? I have been away from it for so long I think I forgot. I just don't associate with people who drink much anymore and seeing these people, who I don't really spend that much time with, w...	Belladay	9	1416	Nov 1, 2007 by cookie1971
	How on earth have I suddenly... (Preview) become a veteran member, I have only been with you a few short weeks. How scarey is THAT! Heartbroken	Heartbroken	7	591	Nov 1, 2007 by Heartbroken
	"I get by with a little help from my friends..." (Preview) It's a simple formula; do your best and somebody might like it. --Dorothy Baker We're never guaranteed success by others' standards. However, if we do our best according to the standards we think God has in mind, we'll be successful. And from God we'll always receive unconditional love and acceptan...	Tiger2006	3	1230	Nov 1, 2007 by Peggy7
	moving through the financial molasses (Preview) As you all know I am deeply in debt after living with the A for 7 years. I left him with practically nothing and he destroyed the only thing I had of value which was my truck which I was never able to recvoer despite my best efforts in getting a restraining order. . I have been working solidly for 6 months now b...	maresie2	4	549	Nov 1, 2007 by maresie2
	So if it is true... (Preview) ... that "when you get busy you get better", my ah should be on the fast track to recovery. HA! So, with the diversion program he must attend 90 AA meetings in 90 days (over the holidays,should be interesting), a professionals group twice per wk, have a psych eval, weekly counseling by a re...	Loupiness	2	672	Nov 1, 2007 by Jen
	AH almost got a dui last night (Preview) AH was supposed to be running to the corner store about a 1/4 mile from home last night. He comes home almost an hour later shaking. He got pulled over and he had been drinking. The cop asked if he had been drinking, he said no, but cop said he smelled alcohol. Didn't have his license with him of course. Cop r...	babysteps	3	762	Nov 1, 2007 by thinkstoomuch
	AH home now, Update (Preview) Well I decided to let AH come home. He has been home 2 days now. How am I feeling? I really do not know. I thought I would be ecstatically happy, like just getting married, or something, but I just feel sort of numb. I love him, and when we were seeing eadh other and he was at the halfway house we were ecstatic,...	verenda	6	669	Nov 1, 2007 by Karilynn
	acceptance struggle to be there (Preview) After an incredibly difficult year full of lows, new lows, frustration, struggles and more, I find it hard to be at a place of acceptance. I konw this is for me the core of my program. When I was struggling with how to cope with the A acceptance was far from my grasp. I raged, grieved, raged, grieved and rag...	maresie2	1	502	Oct 31, 2007 by ddub
	November Business Meeting (Preview) Hello ((((Family))) As the new chairperson for the group, it is my pleasure to chair our business meetings for the next 6 months. This Sunday is the first Sunday of the month so we should have had our business meeting for November. However!!!!!! This weekend I am going to be traveling to Houston to atte...	david62	3	473	Oct 31, 2007 by david62
	RE: Sharing a Meal (Preview) I just wanted to tell you that this has been a good day. I feel aware and pretty balanced. I have come home and cooked for two nights, something that I really like to do because it is such a form of love to give my family. In recovery I found nuggets of balance and I love it when I have it. Like starting somethin...	Belladay	2	1054	Oct 31, 2007 by cookie1971
	Prayers for my cousin's family please (Preview) ((((((((Family)))))), Just got some bad news that my cousin (who is my sister's age) died today. He was a deep sea diver working on pipes, etc. Apparently something went wrong with his equipment and he never surfaced. He was working out west, so I have no idea when the funeral will be. He died doing w...	Karilynn	11	703	Oct 31, 2007 by cookie1971
	Happy Halloween (Preview) (((((((((Family)))))))), Just wanted to take the time to wish you all a Happy Halloween. I hope tomorrow will be filled with love, laughter and fun. Enjoy all the ghosts and goblins and creatures running amok. Hubby and Pipers Kitty will be handing out treats, while I go for my walk in my neighbor...	Karilynn	6	494	Oct 31, 2007 by wp
	RE: Trick or Treat (Preview) Hi guys, all is well. My dad did call finally today and I am ok. He seemed really insecure. I think I feel stronger because of you all. I just thought I am not going to worry, I will put up some boundaries like you said and remember who I am and how far I have come. He seemed so nervous. Here he is 2000 miles away a...	Belladay	1	444	Oct 31, 2007 by Jean4444
	Rock Bottom, the Aftermath, and my Guilt (Preview) I'm not sure where to begin this so I'll start at the beginning of the end. Hope it all makes sense....... My father is an alcoholic. The drinking worsened when I left for college, and by the time I had graduated from school and begun planning my wedding he was at the point where he was comatose for days on e...	Aslan	4	672	Oct 31, 2007 by Belladay
	A little funny...but then again? (Preview) So last night the AH decided to come home, I was cleaning the kitchen after the mess the kids made and went to put the trash in the garage. Well, apparently somewhere in the middle of this I had supposedly said something that set AH off, because he came into the garage, closed the door, and proceeded to sta...	CJC	3	550	Oct 31, 2007 by CJC
	Hellish night with out of control teen..HELP! (Preview) Last night was hell night. I got home from work, picked up the little ones from daycare and then went to pick up the oldest at her school dance. We got home after grocery shopping and I told her to fold clothes and do the rest of her chores. That's where it all started... She started complaining and I to...	carolinagirl	19	829	Oct 31, 2007 by Tenderheartsks
	from all to nothing in 2 weeks (Preview) Just two weeks ago I had what I thought was a somewhat normal life, just what I thought I suppose. I am so hurt, scared, confused and so many mixed feelings right now I don't even know what to do. My fiance and I split, two weeks tomorrow. He has been seen by me with another woman, called his mother to tell he...	justmeagain	4	664	Oct 31, 2007 by maresie2
	consequences of alcoholism (Preview) Dear All, Yesterday evening I was at the funeral of a 29 year old man from the community I grew up in. He crashed his jeep on saturday night while intoxicated and died at the scene. It was his seventh vehicle. A taxi had been organised by his brother but he just couldn't wait as he had things to do in the morni...	maire rua	2	664	Oct 31, 2007 by canadianguy
	Hehe guess who is online at home :) (Preview) ((((Family))))), I have my friends pc up and running until my boss has my tower up :). Just wanted to let you all know. Yours in recovery, Mandy	Mandy123	3	390	Oct 31, 2007 by carosie
	New here help and advice appreciated (Preview) I'm currently in a relationship with a recovering alcoholic and have been for about four years. On and off I have been to face to face meetings in England but I am so busy with work and my degree I barely have time to go. However having discvered this site it seems like a god send I'm very interested in doing...	chick29	7	656	Oct 31, 2007 by leo
	being known (Preview) I had this epiphany this morning that Al anon has given me the gift of being known. I sought that in depth in counselling and never really got it. I had a sense of it but I think I held back. I've been in these rooms for over 2 years now. I came here a basket case, totally paralyzed in depression. I am certinly n...	maresie2	10	573	Oct 31, 2007 by leo
	My sister in law has a few hours left to live (Preview) She had a rare thyroid cancer and she's been fighting it tooth and nail. But she woke up today and her left side started to swell this morning and then her right (signs of organ failure) My brother is with her and picked her up and carried her to the restroom. She refuses to eat, or take her pain meds, she sai...	Friendofyours	11	799	Oct 31, 2007 by leo
	Shocked and Depending on God (my HP) (Preview) Got a call from mom that blew me away tonight. She had a theory: I had made it all up. I had made up all the things I've shared here with you, with my councelor, with my sponsorship family, with my closest friends. I had made up this theory so that my parents would not cut me off financially, and that I would co...	Tiger2006	5	742	Oct 31, 2007 by maire rua
	Without Labels - reprint (Preview) Hi group... Please refrain from using religion or other groupings that may have others feel like they may be judged and/or not included on the basis of their beliefs. Although this board is not formal "Al-Anon", we do, in fact, welcome everyone from every walk of life, and it is inapprop...	canadianguy	2	789	Oct 31, 2007 by abbyal
	I stood up to them (Preview) Hi, this is just a little victory for me. My working environment is not the best for a recovering codependant like myself. I'm always trying to make everyone happy with me all the time and failing miserably. Someone was giving me a hard time at work and I just put up with it a dealt with it and turned the oth...	RainyJamie	4	583	Oct 30, 2007 by nmike
	Thanks For the Prayers (Preview) Hello (((All))), Thank you so very much for the wonderful responses. I have no doubt there were many prayers coming my way these past days. Things are a little bettter, for one day at least. I will just take it no questions. As far as the g-child, I can only be here, help and love. Life can be a wonderfu...	Andrea12	5	519	Oct 30, 2007 by maresie2
	How do I get on with my life? (Preview) I haven't had much to say lately, I am past the point of hoping he'll get better and we can still have a happily ever after ending. I just wonder sometimes if I am getting on with my life or if this is just a holding pattern until? Until what I don't know, until I get totally better and feel able to trust anoth...	carolinagirl	8	764	Oct 30, 2007 by maresie2
	Time (Preview) Our A is 25 and been battling it for 2 1/2 years, since she finished college. Two stints in rehab in FL, four lost jobs, 14 days in jail, one DWI, and over six different half-way houses and apartments. Five relapses, they average about every six months or so but tend to only last a couple of days because sh...	Jeff Reynolds	4	531	Oct 30, 2007 by Jeff Reynolds
	HELP - I cannot enter the chat room... (Preview) No matter what I do I cannot enter the chat room and I thought it would be a good idea to go in to sit and listen and become a little more involved since it is NOT possible for me to go to f2f meetings. I have downloaded the software as directed but if I click on the link in John's chatroom information sticky I si...	Heartbroken	2	451	Oct 30, 2007 by aunitedway
	The Other Night (Preview) my AH decided to "discuss" with me some things. For the life of me I can't even remember what it was. It does not matter because it always ends up in an attempt to verbally abuse me. I get up and walk away and tell him I am not going there. I lay down to go to sleep and he follows me. It's always my faul...	souljoy	3	548	Oct 30, 2007 by souljoy
	Infidelity (Preview) I have been with my partner for around four years in this time he has cheated several times, lied been manipulative and every time I have allowed him to talk me round because of my own unhealthy behaviour patterns. I have attended al anon on and off which has been very helpful, he has also self harmed and a...	chick29	5	672	Oct 30, 2007 by Friendofyours
	He Never Called (Preview) My last post explained how my dad called after a year and it was pretty freaky to say the least. I really didn't expect to hear from him again. He is my AD I guess, as apposed to AH I see you guys use. He is very ill emotionally. He can be very inappropriate even being long distance, which he has been for the las...	Belladay	3	456	Oct 30, 2007 by Belladay
	Lessons I am learning (Preview) Hi Alanon Friends, This is sort been a reflective day for me. I turned 58. I always have a nice day on my birthday. Friends have called. Some of my family has called. I made a cake and my girlfriends came by and we laughed. Two out of three sons called. It is like some of the pieces of the recovery puzzle have c...	nmike	4	466	Oct 30, 2007 by Karilynn
	Update on pc tower and me :) (Preview) Hi all, Still no tower at home. My boss didn't get a chance to work on it this weekend, but hey he is helping me out and for free, so that is a huge blessing. :) I will be back soon. I do have a tower I borrowed from a friend before this other tower came up so I may see if it works tonight, but since it is borrowed I h...	Mandy123	2	581	Oct 30, 2007 by Karilynn
	setting aplan b or in other words not setting myself up (Preview) The holidays are almost on us and they are the time I had the worst time with the A. Last year on Thanskgiiving in my normal over reactive mode I struggled to make a huge feast for him. He went out got stoned, drugged whatever and couldn't even stand up. Yet somehow it was important to him that I spend weeks s...	maresie2	3	651	Oct 29, 2007 by Jean4444
	So Confused... (Preview) I'm not sure how to start this one, I've got a ton of thoughts running through my head, so if I start jumping around and not making sense...I'm sorry. :) My AH hasn't been home in nearly 2 weeks, his drinking has spiraled out of control. It is now to the point that he will walk to the bar, walk back to his place...	CJC	9	610	Oct 29, 2007 by CJC
	Oh God, Enough Already (Preview) Hello All, Well, let's see, I have lost my husband, children lost a father, my son lost his best friend a few weeks ago, he was like one of my own...he lived here most of the time. Financially devistated, Social Security owes me close to 10,000.00 said around 30 more days. My daughter who is only 17 just...	Andrea12	18	714	Oct 29, 2007 by maresie2
	It sure does take time.... (Preview) I hoped that I would recover more quickly than I have heard possible but I keep seeing again and again, how or why it takes time. When I was in denial, protecting my AH of consequences & not expressing any anger ad nauseum; the resulting therapies for children, marital, family etc I figgured had me a...	ddub	1	539	Oct 29, 2007 by nmike
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.