Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

shellymcknight · shellymcknight

I got a call yesterday from my A. I do still love him and someone said it sounded like I wasn't done with him. They were so right. He told me how much he loves me and that he doesn't want to be without me but isn't ready to give up alcohol. He said he needed to do it for himself and that it had to be his decision...

Kim65 · Kim65

I hit rock bottom (and then some) in my checking account. It's all gone, the farm money, whatever it was, it's gone now, sort of the end of an era, I guess. Thankfully I just got my retirement fund check from my previous job, only 1500 bucks, but it looks like a lot to me right now. My plan was to deposit so...

ddub · ddub

First I was going to start a new topic related to Carolina's post about thinking and our kids. Like when one of mine told me not to blame it all on my AH when I answered questions from the younger siblings because I was sick first. I said what?!? Sort of a chicken and egg story - yes I was undiagnosed for...

Belladay · Belladay

Hi everyone, I just wanted you to know that I have found since I have been on this site that I have started thinking about you all, your words, your suffering and your comfort. It has made me want to come back and read up on how each of you are doing. You are becoming so interesting to me. I also feel part of you...

Heaven · Heaven

I'm just beginning with this but I'm pretty sure my husband has been an alcoholic for the entire 20 years we've been married. He started having serious temper tantrums about two months ago and he started drinking more often about two weeks ago. I can't go to meetings yet. This website has gotten me t...

Peggy7 · Peggy7

Keep The Fork....... There was a young woman who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and had been given three months to live So as she was getting her things "in order," she contacted her Pastor and had him come to her house to discuss certain aspects of her final wishes. She told him...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I was in the car on my way to work and I was thinking about myself and realized some things. Firstly I realized that I have not been being the best mom I could be. I was always better than the A (which isn't saying much) but is that really enough? No, I decided, it's not. I can do better with this teenage da...

Belladay · Belladay

Hi everyone. I went out with my neighbors last night and it was fun to give out candy, block style. But does everyone drink? I have been away from it for so long I think I forgot. I just don't associate with people who drink much anymore and seeing these people, who I don't really spend that much time with, w...

Heartbroken · Heartbroken

become a veteran member, I have only been with you a few short weeks. How scarey is THAT! Heartbroken

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

It's a simple formula; do your best and somebody might like it. --Dorothy Baker We're never guaranteed success by others' standards. However, if we do our best according to the standards we think God has in mind, we'll be successful. And from God we'll always receive unconditional love and acceptan...

maresie2 · maresie2

As you all know I am deeply in debt after living with the A for 7 years. I left him with practically nothing and he destroyed the only thing I had of value which was my truck which I was never able to recvoer despite my best efforts in getting a restraining order. . I have been working solidly for 6 months now b...

Loupiness · Loupiness

... that "when you get busy you get better", my ah should be on the fast track to recovery. HA! So, with the diversion program he must attend 90 AA meetings in 90 days (over the holidays,should be interesting), a professionals group twice per wk, have a psych eval, weekly counseling by a re...

babysteps · babysteps

AH was supposed to be running to the corner store about a 1/4 mile from home last night. He comes home almost an hour later shaking. He got pulled over and he had been drinking. The cop asked if he had been drinking, he said no, but cop said he smelled alcohol. Didn't have his license with him of course. Cop r...

verenda · verenda

Well I decided to let AH come home. He has been home 2 days now. How am I feeling? I really do not know. I thought I would be ecstatically happy, like just getting married, or something, but I just feel sort of numb. I love him, and when we were seeing eadh other and he was at the halfway house we were ecstatic,...

maresie2 · maresie2

After an incredibly difficult year full of lows, new lows, frustration, struggles and more, I find it hard to be at a place of acceptance. I konw this is for me the core of my program. When I was struggling with how to cope with the A acceptance was far from my grasp. I raged, grieved, raged, grieved and rag...

david62 · david62

Hello ((((Family))) As the new chairperson for the group, it is my pleasure to chair our business meetings for the next 6 months. This Sunday is the first Sunday of the month so we should have had our business meeting for November. However!!!!!! This weekend I am going to be traveling to Houston to atte...

Belladay · Belladay

I just wanted to tell you that this has been a good day. I feel aware and pretty balanced. I have come home and cooked for two nights, something that I really like to do because it is such a form of love to give my family. In recovery I found nuggets of balance and I love it when I have it. Like starting somethin...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((((((Family)))))), Just got some bad news that my cousin (who is my sister's age) died today. He was a deep sea diver working on pipes, etc. Apparently something went wrong with his equipment and he never surfaced. He was working out west, so I have no idea when the funeral will be. He died doing w...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((((Family)))))))), Just wanted to take the time to wish you all a Happy Halloween. I hope tomorrow will be filled with love, laughter and fun. Enjoy all the ghosts and goblins and creatures running amok. Hubby and Pipers Kitty will be handing out treats, while I go for my walk in my neighbor...

Belladay · Belladay

Hi guys, all is well. My dad did call finally today and I am ok. He seemed really insecure. I think I feel stronger because of you all. I just thought I am not going to worry, I will put up some boundaries like you said and remember who I am and how far I have come. He seemed so nervous. Here he is 2000 miles away a...

Aslan · Aslan

I'm not sure where to begin this so I'll start at the beginning of the end. Hope it all makes sense....... My father is an alcoholic. The drinking worsened when I left for college, and by the time I had graduated from school and begun planning my wedding he was at the point where he was comatose for days on e...

CJC · CJC

So last night the AH decided to come home, I was cleaning the kitchen after the mess the kids made and went to put the trash in the garage. Well, apparently somewhere in the middle of this I had supposedly said something that set AH off, because he came into the garage, closed the door, and proceeded to sta...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Last night was hell night. I got home from work, picked up the little ones from daycare and then went to pick up the oldest at her school dance. We got home after grocery shopping and I told her to fold clothes and do the rest of her chores. That's where it all started... She started complaining and I to...

justmeagain · justmeagain

Just two weeks ago I had what I thought was a somewhat normal life, just what I thought I suppose. I am so hurt, scared, confused and so many mixed feelings right now I don't even know what to do. My fiance and I split, two weeks tomorrow. He has been seen by me with another woman, called his mother to tell he...

maire rua · maire rua

Dear All, Yesterday evening I was at the funeral of a 29 year old man from the community I grew up in. He crashed his jeep on saturday night while intoxicated and died at the scene. It was his seventh vehicle. A taxi had been organised by his brother but he just couldn't wait as he had things to do in the morni...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

((((Family))))), I have my friends pc up and running until my boss has my tower up :). Just wanted to let you all know. Yours in recovery, Mandy

chick29 · chick29

I'm currently in a relationship with a recovering alcoholic and have been for about four years. On and off I have been to face to face meetings in England but I am so busy with work and my degree I barely have time to go. However having discvered this site it seems like a god send I'm very interested in doing...

maresie2 · maresie2

I had this epiphany this morning that Al anon has given me the gift of being known. I sought that in depth in counselling and never really got it. I had a sense of it but I think I held back. I've been in these rooms for over 2 years now. I came here a basket case, totally paralyzed in depression. I am certinly n...

Friendofyours · Friendofyours

She had a rare thyroid cancer and she's been fighting it tooth and nail. But she woke up today and her left side started to swell this morning and then her right (signs of organ failure) My brother is with her and picked her up and carried her to the restroom. She refuses to eat, or take her pain meds, she sai...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Got a call from mom that blew me away tonight. She had a theory: I had made it all up. I had made up all the things I've shared here with you, with my councelor, with my sponsorship family, with my closest friends. I had made up this theory so that my parents would not cut me off financially, and that I would co...

canadianguy · canadianguy

Hi group... Please refrain from using religion or other groupings that may have others feel like they may be judged and/or not included on the basis of their beliefs. Although this board is not formal "Al-Anon", we do, in fact, welcome everyone from every walk of life, and it is inapprop...

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

Hi, this is just a little victory for me. My working environment is not the best for a recovering codependant like myself. I'm always trying to make everyone happy with me all the time and failing miserably. Someone was giving me a hard time at work and I just put up with it a dealt with it and turned the oth...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello (((All))), Thank you so very much for the wonderful responses. I have no doubt there were many prayers coming my way these past days. Things are a little bettter, for one day at least. I will just take it no questions. As far as the g-child, I can only be here, help and love. Life can be a wonderfu...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I haven't had much to say lately, I am past the point of hoping he'll get better and we can still have a happily ever after ending. I just wonder sometimes if I am getting on with my life or if this is just a holding pattern until? Until what I don't know, until I get totally better and feel able to trust anoth...

Jeff Reynolds · Jeff Reynolds

Our A is 25 and been battling it for 2 1/2 years, since she finished college. Two stints in rehab in FL, four lost jobs, 14 days in jail, one DWI, and over six different half-way houses and apartments. Five relapses, they average about every six months or so but tend to only last a couple of days because sh...

Heartbroken · Heartbroken

No matter what I do I cannot enter the chat room and I thought it would be a good idea to go in to sit and listen and become a little more involved since it is NOT possible for me to go to f2f meetings. I have downloaded the software as directed but if I click on the link in John's chatroom information sticky I si...

souljoy · souljoy

my AH decided to "discuss" with me some things. For the life of me I can't even remember what it was. It does not matter because it always ends up in an attempt to verbally abuse me. I get up and walk away and tell him I am not going there. I lay down to go to sleep and he follows me. It's always my faul...

chick29 · chick29

I have been with my partner for around four years in this time he has cheated several times, lied been manipulative and every time I have allowed him to talk me round because of my own unhealthy behaviour patterns. I have attended al anon on and off which has been very helpful, he has also self harmed and a...

Belladay · Belladay

My last post explained how my dad called after a year and it was pretty freaky to say the least. I really didn't expect to hear from him again. He is my AD I guess, as apposed to AH I see you guys use. He is very ill emotionally. He can be very inappropriate even being long distance, which he has been for the las...

nmike · nmike

Hi Alanon Friends, This is sort been a reflective day for me. I turned 58. I always have a nice day on my birthday. Friends have called. Some of my family has called. I made a cake and my girlfriends came by and we laughed. Two out of three sons called. It is like some of the pieces of the recovery puzzle have c...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi all, Still no tower at home. My boss didn't get a chance to work on it this weekend, but hey he is helping me out and for free, so that is a huge blessing. :) I will be back soon. I do have a tower I borrowed from a friend before this other tower came up so I may see if it works tonight, but since it is borrowed I h...

maresie2 · maresie2

The holidays are almost on us and they are the time I had the worst time with the A. Last year on Thanskgiiving in my normal over reactive mode I struggled to make a huge feast for him. He went out got stoned, drugged whatever and couldn't even stand up. Yet somehow it was important to him that I spend weeks s...

CJC · CJC

I'm not sure how to start this one, I've got a ton of thoughts running through my head, so if I start jumping around and not making sense...I'm sorry. :) My AH hasn't been home in nearly 2 weeks, his drinking has spiraled out of control. It is now to the point that he will walk to the bar, walk back to his place...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello All, Well, let's see, I have lost my husband, children lost a father, my son lost his best friend a few weeks ago, he was like one of my own...he lived here most of the time. Financially devistated, Social Security owes me close to 10,000.00 said around 30 more days. My daughter who is only 17 just...

ddub · ddub

I hoped that I would recover more quickly than I have heard possible but I keep seeing again and again, how or why it takes time. When I was in denial, protecting my AH of consequences & not expressing any anger ad nauseum; the resulting therapies for children, marital, family etc I figgured had me a...

chef · chef

Hello, I am new to this and just looking for some answers from people that have gone through the same thing. Me and my girlfriend have been together for over two years. In that time i have been by her side through two rehabs and a dozen hospital visits. She knows that if she keeps drinking she will die but f...

Loupiness · Loupiness

Do any of you ever find yourself surprised about behavior from you or your a that you know exists but keep hoping disappears? I wonder if is that is denial... Last night the kids and I were with some friends at their home. We were having pizza (and wine) and then all the kids were going to a haunted house....

CJ098 · CJ098

Hi all, It's been a while since I last posted. We move into our new apartment on this next Wed. - Halloween. It is cheaper and closer to work so I won't have to take the bus to work anymore. My Ah has 3 DUI's and lost his license 4 yrs ago and can't get it back until next year. I haven't gotten my licsence ren...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi Family, Well I did it I asked my hubby to leave. He left Thursday morning. He went back to the house that afternoon while I was at work. He destroyed my tower to my pc and a few other things. I will be gone for a bit until I am able to get back online. My work donated a tower to me, but at the moment it is not worki...

Jocar · Jocar

Over the last ten days my husband has repeatedly said he wants to move out. He basically only sleeps here now, the rest of the time he's out drinking. I think he is seeing someone, carrying his cell phone with him everywhere (that's how I knew once in the past). I've attempted to be pleasant to him toda...

caro · caro

Hi all, I am new to your forum and am so grateful to have found you. My A is in the midst of a major relapse, and I had planned to visit my family halfway across the country next week. My main concern in leaving is that I'm afraid he will neglect our pets. I could try to arrange care for them, but I feel like that...

dm0141 · dm0141

I found this website when looking for my husband and thought I would join also. I would like to share my story....... My father was an alcoholic all of my life. He died last year and continued to drink until he died. My mother overcome prescription drug use when I was in my teens, but has been drinking f...

kissers · kissers

(((Hi Roomies))) I was bored the other night, so I started googling people from my past. You know curious minds can be. I googled my ex, who had been arrested 6 times for DUI's and I found marijuana in his truck. Anyhoo, he was a volunteer for a recovery house. The recovery house had quoted him saying, &qu...

Diva · Diva

So often I read, "God doesn't give us more to bear than we can handle." Kiddies, if God has anyhing to do with it, this is just not true. Otherwise no one would take a fatal overdose, jump off a high building, or blow his/her brains out with a 9mm pistol. I choose to believe that an HP, whatever y...

Heartbroken · Heartbroken

...to bite size pieces... Everything was getting on top of me. The house, the garden, the chores, the shopping, the correspondence, my responsibilities, even my friends, my programme. then a funny old saying came to mind... " Don't try to eat the whole elephant, instead start by nibbling it...

omajoy · omajoy

My rant on Thursday about my DIL and keeping the grandbaby was good for my soul; I had to do it! The responses I received were pretty wise and y'all tried to see all sides to this thing. Sooo it is now Sunday afternoon. My son came Friday after work and has stayed all weekend being a good father to his child. N...

Unsure · Unsure

I never thought that I could miss someone so much, to the point that I find no pleasure in any one else right now. I don't want to be around people, I don't want to go to work, but I do these things and resent these people. I resent having to deal with them, they aren't my family, they aren't people I care abo...

justmeagain · justmeagain

Hello all, it has been about two years plus since I was last here. Just when all is well..it's not. Fiance and I seperated on October 15., his son is getting out of jail the day after Thanksgiving. His son had lived with us for three years at one point. He stole from us, robbed from us, caused major probl...

norwood · norwood

I shared soething this morning that I wanted to share with others as those who heard it thought it made good sense for us to keep in mind at times Topics action v reaction, responsibility, serenity these are great topics for me today as most of you know one reason I am here is because I was detached f...

Belladay · Belladay

Hi everyone. This is my first time here. I have read some of your posts and really appreciate all the honesty. I wanted to see if I could tell you something. I don't really know what to do about it. Life really can be so confusing. You see, my dad is an alcoholic. He left us years ago. Since then I have gotten s...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Back Again?!?! (Preview) I got a call yesterday from my A. I do still love him and someone said it sounded like I wasn't done with him. They were so right. He told me how much he loves me and that he doesn't want to be without me but isn't ready to give up alcohol. He said he needed to do it for himself and that it had to be his decision...	shellymcknight	3	340	Nov 2, 2007 by Christy
	Must share this . . . (Preview) I hit rock bottom (and then some) in my checking account. It's all gone, the farm money, whatever it was, it's gone now, sort of the end of an era, I guess. Thankfully I just got my retirement fund check from my previous job, only 1500 bucks, but it looks like a lot to me right now. My plan was to deposit so...	Kim65	11	613	Nov 2, 2007 by Jean4444
	doing it again...... (Preview) First I was going to start a new topic related to Carolina's post about thinking and our kids. Like when one of mine told me not to blame it all on my AH when I answered questions from the younger siblings because I was sick first. I said what?!? Sort of a chicken and egg story - yes I was undiagnosed for...	ddub	2	512	Nov 2, 2007 by david62
	Carry you with me (Preview) Hi everyone, I just wanted you to know that I have found since I have been on this site that I have started thinking about you all, your words, your suffering and your comfort. It has made me want to come back and read up on how each of you are doing. You are becoming so interesting to me. I also feel part of you...	Belladay	1	471	Nov 2, 2007 by rtexas
	Just realizing there is a problem... (Preview) I'm just beginning with this but I'm pretty sure my husband has been an alcoholic for the entire 20 years we've been married. He started having serious temper tantrums about two months ago and he started drinking more often about two weeks ago. I can't go to meetings yet. This website has gotten me t...	Heaven	1	476	Nov 2, 2007 by rtexas
	Keep The Fork..... (Preview) Keep The Fork....... There was a young woman who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and had been given three months to live So as she was getting her things "in order," she contacted her Pastor and had him come to her house to discuss certain aspects of her final wishes. She told him...	Peggy7	2	537	Nov 2, 2007 by Karilynn
	I was thinking this morning (shocker I know) LOL (Preview) I was in the car on my way to work and I was thinking about myself and realized some things. Firstly I realized that I have not been being the best mom I could be. I was always better than the A (which isn't saying much) but is that really enough? No, I decided, it's not. I can do better with this teenage da...	carolinagirl	10	652	Nov 2, 2007 by Jean4444
	RE: A Drink or Candy (Preview) Hi everyone. I went out with my neighbors last night and it was fun to give out candy, block style. But does everyone drink? I have been away from it for so long I think I forgot. I just don't associate with people who drink much anymore and seeing these people, who I don't really spend that much time with, w...	Belladay	9	1325	Nov 1, 2007 by cookie1971
	How on earth have I suddenly... (Preview) become a veteran member, I have only been with you a few short weeks. How scarey is THAT! Heartbroken	Heartbroken	7	531	Nov 1, 2007 by Heartbroken
	"I get by with a little help from my friends..." (Preview) It's a simple formula; do your best and somebody might like it. --Dorothy Baker We're never guaranteed success by others' standards. However, if we do our best according to the standards we think God has in mind, we'll be successful. And from God we'll always receive unconditional love and acceptan...	Tiger2006	3	1135	Nov 1, 2007 by Peggy7
	moving through the financial molasses (Preview) As you all know I am deeply in debt after living with the A for 7 years. I left him with practically nothing and he destroyed the only thing I had of value which was my truck which I was never able to recvoer despite my best efforts in getting a restraining order. . I have been working solidly for 6 months now b...	maresie2	4	495	Nov 1, 2007 by maresie2
	So if it is true... (Preview) ... that "when you get busy you get better", my ah should be on the fast track to recovery. HA! So, with the diversion program he must attend 90 AA meetings in 90 days (over the holidays,should be interesting), a professionals group twice per wk, have a psych eval, weekly counseling by a re...	Loupiness	2	612	Nov 1, 2007 by Jen
	AH almost got a dui last night (Preview) AH was supposed to be running to the corner store about a 1/4 mile from home last night. He comes home almost an hour later shaking. He got pulled over and he had been drinking. The cop asked if he had been drinking, he said no, but cop said he smelled alcohol. Didn't have his license with him of course. Cop r...	babysteps	3	698	Nov 1, 2007 by thinkstoomuch
	AH home now, Update (Preview) Well I decided to let AH come home. He has been home 2 days now. How am I feeling? I really do not know. I thought I would be ecstatically happy, like just getting married, or something, but I just feel sort of numb. I love him, and when we were seeing eadh other and he was at the halfway house we were ecstatic,...	verenda	6	604	Nov 1, 2007 by Karilynn
	acceptance struggle to be there (Preview) After an incredibly difficult year full of lows, new lows, frustration, struggles and more, I find it hard to be at a place of acceptance. I konw this is for me the core of my program. When I was struggling with how to cope with the A acceptance was far from my grasp. I raged, grieved, raged, grieved and rag...	maresie2	1	446	Oct 31, 2007 by ddub
	November Business Meeting (Preview) Hello ((((Family))) As the new chairperson for the group, it is my pleasure to chair our business meetings for the next 6 months. This Sunday is the first Sunday of the month so we should have had our business meeting for November. However!!!!!! This weekend I am going to be traveling to Houston to atte...	david62	3	413	Oct 31, 2007 by david62
	RE: Sharing a Meal (Preview) I just wanted to tell you that this has been a good day. I feel aware and pretty balanced. I have come home and cooked for two nights, something that I really like to do because it is such a form of love to give my family. In recovery I found nuggets of balance and I love it when I have it. Like starting somethin...	Belladay	2	974	Oct 31, 2007 by cookie1971
	Prayers for my cousin's family please (Preview) ((((((((Family)))))), Just got some bad news that my cousin (who is my sister's age) died today. He was a deep sea diver working on pipes, etc. Apparently something went wrong with his equipment and he never surfaced. He was working out west, so I have no idea when the funeral will be. He died doing w...	Karilynn	11	638	Oct 31, 2007 by cookie1971
	Happy Halloween (Preview) (((((((((Family)))))))), Just wanted to take the time to wish you all a Happy Halloween. I hope tomorrow will be filled with love, laughter and fun. Enjoy all the ghosts and goblins and creatures running amok. Hubby and Pipers Kitty will be handing out treats, while I go for my walk in my neighbor...	Karilynn	6	433	Oct 31, 2007 by wp
	RE: Trick or Treat (Preview) Hi guys, all is well. My dad did call finally today and I am ok. He seemed really insecure. I think I feel stronger because of you all. I just thought I am not going to worry, I will put up some boundaries like you said and remember who I am and how far I have come. He seemed so nervous. Here he is 2000 miles away a...	Belladay	1	360	Oct 31, 2007 by Jean4444
	Rock Bottom, the Aftermath, and my Guilt (Preview) I'm not sure where to begin this so I'll start at the beginning of the end. Hope it all makes sense....... My father is an alcoholic. The drinking worsened when I left for college, and by the time I had graduated from school and begun planning my wedding he was at the point where he was comatose for days on e...	Aslan	4	608	Oct 31, 2007 by Belladay
	A little funny...but then again? (Preview) So last night the AH decided to come home, I was cleaning the kitchen after the mess the kids made and went to put the trash in the garage. Well, apparently somewhere in the middle of this I had supposedly said something that set AH off, because he came into the garage, closed the door, and proceeded to sta...	CJC	3	492	Oct 31, 2007 by CJC
	Hellish night with out of control teen..HELP! (Preview) Last night was hell night. I got home from work, picked up the little ones from daycare and then went to pick up the oldest at her school dance. We got home after grocery shopping and I told her to fold clothes and do the rest of her chores. That's where it all started... She started complaining and I to...	carolinagirl	19	770	Oct 31, 2007 by Tenderheartsks
	from all to nothing in 2 weeks (Preview) Just two weeks ago I had what I thought was a somewhat normal life, just what I thought I suppose. I am so hurt, scared, confused and so many mixed feelings right now I don't even know what to do. My fiance and I split, two weeks tomorrow. He has been seen by me with another woman, called his mother to tell he...	justmeagain	4	607	Oct 31, 2007 by maresie2
	consequences of alcoholism (Preview) Dear All, Yesterday evening I was at the funeral of a 29 year old man from the community I grew up in. He crashed his jeep on saturday night while intoxicated and died at the scene. It was his seventh vehicle. A taxi had been organised by his brother but he just couldn't wait as he had things to do in the morni...	maire rua	2	599	Oct 31, 2007 by canadianguy
	Hehe guess who is online at home :) (Preview) ((((Family))))), I have my friends pc up and running until my boss has my tower up :). Just wanted to let you all know. Yours in recovery, Mandy	Mandy123	3	327	Oct 31, 2007 by carosie
	New here help and advice appreciated (Preview) I'm currently in a relationship with a recovering alcoholic and have been for about four years. On and off I have been to face to face meetings in England but I am so busy with work and my degree I barely have time to go. However having discvered this site it seems like a god send I'm very interested in doing...	chick29	7	596	Oct 31, 2007 by leo
	being known (Preview) I had this epiphany this morning that Al anon has given me the gift of being known. I sought that in depth in counselling and never really got it. I had a sense of it but I think I held back. I've been in these rooms for over 2 years now. I came here a basket case, totally paralyzed in depression. I am certinly n...	maresie2	10	505	Oct 31, 2007 by leo
	My sister in law has a few hours left to live (Preview) She had a rare thyroid cancer and she's been fighting it tooth and nail. But she woke up today and her left side started to swell this morning and then her right (signs of organ failure) My brother is with her and picked her up and carried her to the restroom. She refuses to eat, or take her pain meds, she sai...	Friendofyours	11	740	Oct 31, 2007 by leo
	Shocked and Depending on God (my HP) (Preview) Got a call from mom that blew me away tonight. She had a theory: I had made it all up. I had made up all the things I've shared here with you, with my councelor, with my sponsorship family, with my closest friends. I had made up this theory so that my parents would not cut me off financially, and that I would co...	Tiger2006	5	676	Oct 31, 2007 by maire rua
	Without Labels - reprint (Preview) Hi group... Please refrain from using religion or other groupings that may have others feel like they may be judged and/or not included on the basis of their beliefs. Although this board is not formal "Al-Anon", we do, in fact, welcome everyone from every walk of life, and it is inapprop...	canadianguy	2	732	Oct 31, 2007 by abbyal
	I stood up to them (Preview) Hi, this is just a little victory for me. My working environment is not the best for a recovering codependant like myself. I'm always trying to make everyone happy with me all the time and failing miserably. Someone was giving me a hard time at work and I just put up with it a dealt with it and turned the oth...	RainyJamie	4	527	Oct 30, 2007 by nmike
	Thanks For the Prayers (Preview) Hello (((All))), Thank you so very much for the wonderful responses. I have no doubt there were many prayers coming my way these past days. Things are a little bettter, for one day at least. I will just take it no questions. As far as the g-child, I can only be here, help and love. Life can be a wonderfu...	Andrea12	5	454	Oct 30, 2007 by maresie2
	How do I get on with my life? (Preview) I haven't had much to say lately, I am past the point of hoping he'll get better and we can still have a happily ever after ending. I just wonder sometimes if I am getting on with my life or if this is just a holding pattern until? Until what I don't know, until I get totally better and feel able to trust anoth...	carolinagirl	8	696	Oct 30, 2007 by maresie2
	Time (Preview) Our A is 25 and been battling it for 2 1/2 years, since she finished college. Two stints in rehab in FL, four lost jobs, 14 days in jail, one DWI, and over six different half-way houses and apartments. Five relapses, they average about every six months or so but tend to only last a couple of days because sh...	Jeff Reynolds	4	439	Oct 30, 2007 by Jeff Reynolds
	HELP - I cannot enter the chat room... (Preview) No matter what I do I cannot enter the chat room and I thought it would be a good idea to go in to sit and listen and become a little more involved since it is NOT possible for me to go to f2f meetings. I have downloaded the software as directed but if I click on the link in John's chatroom information sticky I si...	Heartbroken	2	393	Oct 30, 2007 by aunitedway
	The Other Night (Preview) my AH decided to "discuss" with me some things. For the life of me I can't even remember what it was. It does not matter because it always ends up in an attempt to verbally abuse me. I get up and walk away and tell him I am not going there. I lay down to go to sleep and he follows me. It's always my faul...	souljoy	3	488	Oct 30, 2007 by souljoy
	Infidelity (Preview) I have been with my partner for around four years in this time he has cheated several times, lied been manipulative and every time I have allowed him to talk me round because of my own unhealthy behaviour patterns. I have attended al anon on and off which has been very helpful, he has also self harmed and a...	chick29	5	571	Oct 30, 2007 by Friendofyours
	He Never Called (Preview) My last post explained how my dad called after a year and it was pretty freaky to say the least. I really didn't expect to hear from him again. He is my AD I guess, as apposed to AH I see you guys use. He is very ill emotionally. He can be very inappropriate even being long distance, which he has been for the las...	Belladay	3	396	Oct 30, 2007 by Belladay
	Lessons I am learning (Preview) Hi Alanon Friends, This is sort been a reflective day for me. I turned 58. I always have a nice day on my birthday. Friends have called. Some of my family has called. I made a cake and my girlfriends came by and we laughed. Two out of three sons called. It is like some of the pieces of the recovery puzzle have c...	nmike	4	409	Oct 30, 2007 by Karilynn
	Update on pc tower and me :) (Preview) Hi all, Still no tower at home. My boss didn't get a chance to work on it this weekend, but hey he is helping me out and for free, so that is a huge blessing. :) I will be back soon. I do have a tower I borrowed from a friend before this other tower came up so I may see if it works tonight, but since it is borrowed I h...	Mandy123	2	521	Oct 30, 2007 by Karilynn
	setting aplan b or in other words not setting myself up (Preview) The holidays are almost on us and they are the time I had the worst time with the A. Last year on Thanskgiiving in my normal over reactive mode I struggled to make a huge feast for him. He went out got stoned, drugged whatever and couldn't even stand up. Yet somehow it was important to him that I spend weeks s...	maresie2	3	575	Oct 29, 2007 by Jean4444
	So Confused... (Preview) I'm not sure how to start this one, I've got a ton of thoughts running through my head, so if I start jumping around and not making sense...I'm sorry. :) My AH hasn't been home in nearly 2 weeks, his drinking has spiraled out of control. It is now to the point that he will walk to the bar, walk back to his place...	CJC	9	549	Oct 29, 2007 by CJC
	Oh God, Enough Already (Preview) Hello All, Well, let's see, I have lost my husband, children lost a father, my son lost his best friend a few weeks ago, he was like one of my own...he lived here most of the time. Financially devistated, Social Security owes me close to 10,000.00 said around 30 more days. My daughter who is only 17 just...	Andrea12	18	659	Oct 29, 2007 by maresie2
	It sure does take time.... (Preview) I hoped that I would recover more quickly than I have heard possible but I keep seeing again and again, how or why it takes time. When I was in denial, protecting my AH of consequences & not expressing any anger ad nauseum; the resulting therapies for children, marital, family etc I figgured had me a...	ddub	1	475	Oct 29, 2007 by nmike
	Why is my life taken over by her problem (Preview) Hello, I am new to this and just looking for some answers from people that have gone through the same thing. Me and my girlfriend have been together for over two years. In that time i have been by her side through two rehabs and a dozen hospital visits. She knows that if she keeps drinking she will die but f...	chef	6	700	Oct 29, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Round and Round (Preview) Do any of you ever find yourself surprised about behavior from you or your a that you know exists but keep hoping disappears? I wonder if is that is denial... Last night the kids and I were with some friends at their home. We were having pizza (and wine) and then all the kids were going to a haunted house....	Loupiness	12	432	Oct 29, 2007 by thinkstoomuch
	My AH has been Fired (Preview) Hi all, It's been a while since I last posted. We move into our new apartment on this next Wed. - Halloween. It is cheaper and closer to work so I won't have to take the bus to work anymore. My Ah has 3 DUI's and lost his license 4 yrs ago and can't get it back until next year. I haven't gotten my licsence ren...	CJ098	7	704	Oct 29, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Hubby did a dance on my pc tower. Will be back when I can. (Preview) Hi Family, Well I did it I asked my hubby to leave. He left Thursday morning. He went back to the house that afternoon while I was at work. He destroyed my tower to my pc and a few other things. I will be gone for a bit until I am able to get back online. My work donated a tower to me, but at the moment it is not worki...	Mandy123	6	548	Oct 29, 2007 by carolinagirl
	husband keeps saying he wants to move out and my heart is breaking (Preview) Over the last ten days my husband has repeatedly said he wants to move out. He basically only sleeps here now, the rest of the time he's out drinking. I think he is seeing someone, carrying his cell phone with him everywhere (that's how I knew once in the past). I've attempted to be pleasant to him toda...	Jocar	5	567	Oct 29, 2007 by carolinagirl
	travel concern (Preview) Hi all, I am new to your forum and am so grateful to have found you. My A is in the midst of a major relapse, and I had planned to visit my family halfway across the country next week. My main concern in leaving is that I'm afraid he will neglect our pets. I could try to arrange care for them, but I feel like that...	caro	4	481	Oct 29, 2007 by carolinagirl
	New here: (Preview) I found this website when looking for my husband and thought I would join also. I would like to share my story....... My father was an alcoholic all of my life. He died last year and continued to drink until he died. My mother overcome prescription drug use when I was in my teens, but has been drinking f...	dm0141	6	349	Oct 29, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Are They For Real???? (Preview) (((Hi Roomies))) I was bored the other night, so I started googling people from my past. You know curious minds can be. I googled my ex, who had been arrested 6 times for DUI's and I found marijuana in his truck. Anyhoo, he was a volunteer for a recovery house. The recovery house had quoted him saying, &qu...	kissers	6	511	Oct 29, 2007 by carolinagirl
	The strength to see it through... (Preview) So often I read, "God doesn't give us more to bear than we can handle." Kiddies, if God has anyhing to do with it, this is just not true. Otherwise no one would take a fatal overdose, jump off a high building, or blow his/her brains out with a 9mm pistol. I choose to believe that an HP, whatever y...	Diva	8	664	Oct 29, 2007 by Andrea12
	Overwhelmed...then break it down... (Preview) ...to bite size pieces... Everything was getting on top of me. The house, the garden, the chores, the shopping, the correspondence, my responsibilities, even my friends, my programme. then a funny old saying came to mind... " Don't try to eat the whole elephant, instead start by nibbling it...	Heartbroken	3	376	Oct 28, 2007 by cookie1971
	totally angry "update" (Preview) My rant on Thursday about my DIL and keeping the grandbaby was good for my soul; I had to do it! The responses I received were pretty wise and y'all tried to see all sides to this thing. Sooo it is now Sunday afternoon. My son came Friday after work and has stayed all weekend being a good father to his child. N...	omajoy	3	1143	Oct 28, 2007 by cookie1971
	Missing my mom (Preview) I never thought that I could miss someone so much, to the point that I find no pleasure in any one else right now. I don't want to be around people, I don't want to go to work, but I do these things and resent these people. I resent having to deal with them, they aren't my family, they aren't people I care abo...	Unsure	8	515	Oct 28, 2007 by Unsure
	Back to square one (Preview) Hello all, it has been about two years plus since I was last here. Just when all is well..it's not. Fiance and I seperated on October 15., his son is getting out of jail the day after Thanksgiving. His son had lived with us for three years at one point. He stole from us, robbed from us, caused major probl...	justmeagain	1	526	Oct 28, 2007 by Jean4444
	alanonese (Preview) I shared soething this morning that I wanted to share with others as those who heard it thought it made good sense for us to keep in mind at times Topics action v reaction, responsibility, serenity these are great topics for me today as most of you know one reason I am here is because I was detached f...	norwood	5	665	Oct 28, 2007 by Belladay
	My Dad Called (Preview) Hi everyone. This is my first time here. I have read some of your posts and really appreciate all the honesty. I wanted to see if I could tell you something. I don't really know what to do about it. Life really can be so confusing. You see, my dad is an alcoholic. He left us years ago. Since then I have gotten s...	Belladay	2	511	Oct 28, 2007 by lin0606
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.