Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

DM2021 · DM2021

The steps can be broken down into 4 parts,1 to 3 are about facing up, 4 to 6 are owning up, 7 to 9 are making up, 10 to 12 are keeping up. Twelve Steps1. We admitted we were powerless over alcoholthat our lives had become unmanageable.2. Came to believe that a Power greater t...

SusannaMaria · SusannaMaria

Hi I live on a small island and am looking to find an online sponsor

Lyne · Lyne

Why do they drink when they know it damages themself and the family? How do they justify drinking behavior--after all, they are suffering too? Reminder: Trying to analyze why another person persists in destructive behavior cannot help me out of my own difficulties. I can overcome them only by tu...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Todays reading is on the topic of forgiveness. The writer begins by acknowledging that in his/her early days in the program, he/she did not feel the capacity for forgiveness. The writer also stated that he/she equated forgiveness with accepting unacceptable behavior. O...

tyt84 · tyt84

Hello, This is my first time posting here, but I have read many threads and they have been helpful in my journey in navigating life with an alcoholic spouse. I regularly attend Al-Anon meetings and rehab support groups, but I've yet to be able to discuss the below out of the shame and fear that it has caus...

DM2021 · DM2021

Al-Anon's Twelve Traditions1. Our common welfare should come first; personal progress for the greatest number depends upon unity.2. For our group purpose there is but one authoritya loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servantsthey do not gove...

DM2021 · DM2021

Today's reading starts out with bringing to mind how it feels to go to the grocery store to find that the item(s) weexpect to be there are gone and that the grocer only needs to take inventory to realize that it is time to restock. For us taking the step to do an inventory on ourselves, by doing the 4th Step...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on decision making. In the past, their desire to make decisions that got them exactly what they wanted prevented them from making decisions at all. In Al-Anon, the author learned that we can never know the outcomes of our decisions, we can only use...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

'We punish ourselves far more than life ever punishes us' begins today's reading, perhaps a startling claim for some. We may see this in action, however, when we observe the fearful thoughts that can arise in our mind around the alcoholic's behavior and consider the distress we feel as a result. Alan...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

February 17th marked six years since we lost the founder of this site, Miracles in Progress. The anniversary was noted on another MIP message board and I felt a need to acknowledge it here as well. The Al-Anon message board has been the most active at this site and I am forever grateful to John F for it's c...

Lyne · Lyne

Early on, the member learned that abuse of any kind was unacceptable. Each of us have choices, and we can set limits, give ourselves guidelines, etc. But it took several years to realize that it was they who were still abusing themself. In this case it was verbal abuse--calling themself homely, th...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about how we can give any and all anxieties and troubles to our Higher Power. The writer describes growing up in an alcoholic home; her parents were unaware of so much that was happening to the extent that a babysitter abused her and life went on as if nothing had...

DM2021 · DM2021

This day's reading reminds us that in Al-Anon when we feel at our lowest and most afraid is the time to realizethat our faith and prayer in and to our Higher Power can bring about the relief and answers we need. Todays Reminder: "I have an important part to play in my relationship with my Higher Power...

freedomssong · freedomssong

Hi All, I'm relatively new to actively being involved in Al-Anon, though I have known about aspects of it most of my life and I'm about to turn 61. I'm aware that I have a huge pattern of forcing solutions. It started when I was a very young child, as my mother, who has been sober for almost 50 years, starte...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Great perspective check today as we are asked to consider how confusion can be a gift. This can be when we feel we need to make a change but are uncertain as to what it should be. Confusion may be a sign of grace that helps me realize that it is not yet time to act. When we know more than we need to before it is ti...

Lyne · Lyne

Every person is different, in alanon and elsewhere. Comparing ourselves to others is a defect of character and it causes self-dislike. Each of us have special qualities and we should not compare ourselves to anyone else's recovery. We are all doing the best we can. We offer an important contrib...

DM2021 · DM2021

The C2C reading today suggests that in order to help us in Al-Anon get past all the negativity that we have been living with due tothe disease of alcoholism and its affect on our personalities, that we replace those negative feelings towards ourselves with actionsthat are positive and/or creative....

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about how the climate in an alcoholic home can be one of division and separation. The writer describes seeing parents divided during arguments fueled by alcohol, siblings being divided when hearing why cant you be more like your brother or sister and divi...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on their friendships with people. The author notes that they sometimes reach out and try to be friends with people, even when those attempts are friendships are repeatedly rebuffed. The closing line at Al-Anon meetings ("though you may not like a...

Youknowme · Youknowme

Today's C2C speaks of violence, and of the fact that whilst al-anon does not give advice regarding staying or leaving relationships, but emphasises personal responsibility for our own safety and well-being. It reminds us that no matter how unfair, dangerous or harmful the behaviour of another is...

Chinstrap · Chinstrap

Hello, I'm sure my story is a familiar one. My husband of 4 years has always had a problem with drinking to excess. Previous to meeting me it resulted in serious cases of self harm. When we got together he seemed to turn a corner despite some back slides but I always made sure I was there for him, loved h...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Regardless of circumstances, we have the capability to take at least a small step towards a positive result or feeling notes this writer. This can be an action in the program, for someone else, addressing a health or emotional need of our own, something we fear, something that will recharge or stir o...

Lyne · Lyne

The newcomer to alanon is given a suggestion to wait 6 months before making any major decisions. Thinking can change dramatically after 6 months of program. At that time, the writer decided to continue to wait, to learn and to recover, before deciding about their relationship. But the writer ha...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is a focus on the slogan: think. As the writer points out, for many of us thinking (too much) is the problem. The intention of this one word slogan is to think before acting, think without acting impulsively, act with thoughtfulness, not reaction. The writer ha...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Hey all. It's been a while, a long while. Last I posted, I believe I was headed from KS to AZ to deal with my parents. I've made several trips back/forth trying to be of service -- so wish they lived closer. My mother passed away on New Year's Day so went out to be with my dad, clear things from the memory c...

SunnyFrog · SunnyFrog

I know there's already lots of topics on forgiveness but I wanted to create a new one. I have been praying,meditating ,using all the tools I know of trying to forgive and let go of past things that the A in my life did. Some of them just seem/feel unforgivable. Although I am no longer with him,this anger I s...

DM2021 · DM2021

I must warn you all you may find this long! Today's C2C reading discusses how anyone new to Al-Anon expects that they will learn how to "cure" the alcoholic in their life. That the Al-Anon program will, in essence, produce their serenity, by easing all their past and present pain. What we soonlea...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

This author worked hard learning and applying Alanon principles before falling prey to self pity and resentment over the perceived failures of the alcoholic to deliver emotional support. Meditation on Steps 6 and 7 shed light: were entirely ready, humbly asking higher power to remove our shortc...

Lyne · Lyne

This reading begins: " The alcoholic was obsessed with alcohol, and I was obsessed with the alcoholic.". The writer watched, monitored, controlled, felt hurt, self-pity, embarrassment, superiority, resentment, and anger. The writer also felt misery, wretchedness, and gloom, but eventuall...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Last week I mistakenly wrote a reflection on todays date in Hope for Today, so todays reflection will be from Jan 22, in case you have the book and are reading as well. Todays reading is a focus on the al-anon suggestions to seek progress rather than perfection and to mind our own b...

DM2021 · DM2021

The author of today's C2C reading suggests that one cannot make changes for a multitude of issues, in one day. That sometimes we find our selves so troubled over a small issue when in fact that small issue is just the strawthat broke the camel's back. Talking it out with an Al-Anon member or sponsor ca...

shimo · shimo

A Credo of Detachment by Evelyn Leite You and I are in a relationship which I value and want to keep. Yet each of us is a separate person with his own unique needs and the right to try to meet those needs. I know that when you lash out at me in anger it is because you are in pain. I will try to have sympathy for...

Skorpi · Skorpi

In today's reading, the author shares about how hard it was to talk about themselves in meetings initially, and how hard it was to focus on themselves, their feelings, their wants, and their needs. With the help of their sponsor, the author realized that they were overly interested in others because...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page considers alcoholism as a disease, something that cannot be controlled by will power alone. If that is so, why do I perhaps act toward the alcoholic like it can be? Reminder - 'Arguments are useless against sickness.' Compassion and understanding are powerful and helpful because they...

WendyP · WendyP

HI it's WendyP, at the moment I am going through a very stressful family issue, and feeling the effects of it, not being able to sleep, eat, etc, and because I am in that zone at the moment, and feeling like I am, I started to Question myself, if I was working my program, and not working my program. I started...

Drpc · Drpc

My AH is now sober and active in AA. I found out that he cheated on me for years with different women and I am having so much trouble forgiving him. Is there anything in Al-anon that can specifically help with cheating or would I find a therapist?

Lyne · Lyne

Today's writer is exploring how to understand and keep an attitude of gratitude. It isn't when life happens the way we want, nor a high from instant gratification. Instead, it has been learned that gratitude is an integral part of serenity, and it is often the means to restoring serenity. Gratitu...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Todays reading is a look at the difference between our responsibilities and the responsibilities we take on out of some sense of obligation. The writer begins with a comparison between how the responsibility and authority of Al-anon world services belongs to al-anon grou...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Apologies everybody- I wrote about the writing for 1/29. Next week I will double back and write about 1/22. sorry- the last thing I want to do is wish time away! m

DM2021 · DM2021

In today's reading it is about the spiritual foundation of one of Al-Anon's Traditions, "anonymity."The author tries to impress on the reader the importance of both the members and the alcoholicsanonymity and the obligation membership has to provide for each other a safe, free from labelsenviro...

youknowme2 · youknowme2

Me here. I had to make yet another new account. I'm so sorry- I must have 6 or 7 now. My computer was destroyed yesterday in a random electrical event (I am so sad about it, it's an expensive nightmare) and when I tried to log in from my old laptop it didn't have my details. I wasn't able to recover my password...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shared that they almost didn't come back to Al-Anon when they heard that the best way to help an alcoholic was to focus on oneself. The author interpreted Al-Anon as a heartless place, and a place that would force them to stop caring about their loved ones. The a...

Fedora · Fedora

Recently my ex Spouse managed to get his second (of 3) DUIs dismissed. This despite a staggeringly awful police report, and the fact that he couldn't even show up to the arraignment because he was in the hospital for alcohol withdrawl. And yet the legal system is very happy to ignore the fact that he dr...

luv123 · luv123

I found this so helpful from the Al-anon website and thought I would share it. May have been shared in the past but is a gem worth repeating and re-reading (for me maybe daily right about now) Love to all! LUV123 FIND AT: https://al-anon.org/blog/im-putting-son-care/ Im Putting My Son in Your C...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

This honest writer admitted they would likely be judged insane if observed while interacting with the alcoholic. A combination of poor behavior and poor state of mind were the results of trying to control alcohol with reason or force of will. Restoration of sanity was the promise, a higher power wa...

Lyne · Lyne

Today's writer did not understand the concept of humility nor how to develop it. Being teachable becomes an important aspect, and to accomplish this, listening is an extremely important skill. It also involves being open to what you hear. The alanon program works as long as we stay open, honest,...

DM2021 · DM2021

Had two chemo treatments to my bladder 3 months ago, was suppose to have 6 but was allergic to it and it was stopped. Read that in my case two treatments could do the trick. Well saw the urologist this morning and my bladder is cancer free!!!! Wahoo!!! Just had to share!!! {{HUGS}}

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about what brings us to Al-Anon in the first place, and what we might learn about ourselves once we are here. The writer describes coming to the program because of her husbands drinking. What she had trouble understanding once there, was why she was answering...

luv123 · luv123

HI All, I was at a meeting in another state and I heard about this group of Al-anon members that wrote daily letters to God/HP and shared them with each other each day. I began doing it most days. Sounded like a good way to stay on top of communicating with each other, HP and a kind of tenth step/prayer...

DM2021 · DM2021

In today's C2C reading the author marvels at how once they established their faith in a God/HP, how centered/grounded their life became. Al-Anon helps and guides us to work at creating a personal connection to our individual faith and relationship with our Higher Powerbecause once we do, we will f...

imom · imom

I haven't been active in al-anon for many years. I finally left my AH in 2015. Sadly, just months later he was found deceased in our dream home...overdose. I have spent all these years since then working on myself and getting stronger while continuing to nurture and raise our two children (who are no...

glad lee · glad lee

This was posted here on MIP when I first began lurking six years ago. It convinced me to crawl into my first al-anon meeting.... Letting Go of Those Not in Recovery We can go forward with our life (and recoveries) even though someone we love is not yet recovering. Picture a bridge. On one side of the b...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares about their new family - a family in which they are free to be themselves, a family where love isn't a point system, where the author is accepted for who they are and masking isn't needed. When the author faces a problem this second family empathizes, bu...

mamamary1964 · mamamary1964

My 22 yr old daughter completed her 4th rehab 11/30 and moved into sober living. She hates it and wants to come home. We had a family session with her counselor (she is doing PHP) last week where I said that I am not comfortable with her returning just yet and need more time (she has returned home 3 prior t...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Things aren't always as they seem I guess. I am finding more about my husband of 23 years. It turns out he was a very sick man & I didn't know how sick. He had a lot of memories that weren't actually truths. He shared a lot w/ me but I am saddened to see that he had a lot of memories that might not have been how...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

...this author would have a lot of time in bottles that they didn't enjoy, having spent it in criticism, paranoia, self-criticism rather than useful accomplishment. To break the cycle of 'mental static', they: * got out of the regrets of past and fears of future, * learned to stay in and enjoy the pre...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about how prayer and meditation is helpful as a focus for the solutions to problems in our lives. The writer describes that having continuous communication with God was not an issue. The writer was also able to tune out distractions easily. Yet the writer was...

Youknowme · Youknowme

Hi everyone. Sorry I have abandoned my daily and haven't been around. There is a lot going on and I haven't felt very positive or like sharing with anyone. Honestly I feel defeated and sad and out of mojo. The situation with my brother has deteriorated a lot. I missed Christmas last year as my son-in-law...

Lyne · Lyne

The writer believed that the alcoholics caused their pain, suffering, and great unhappiness. But alanon suggested we take responsibility for our own happiness. The writer's sponsor thought it best to stop expecting the alcoholic's behavior to change. Instead, detach and change one's own at...

DM2021 · DM2021

The author of todays reading discusses how to tell the difference between compassion for the alcoholic and enabling their bad behavior. They point out that it is not always clear but that looking at their motives for the intervention in that situation is helpful. Will interfering change the outc...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	The 12 Steps of Al-Anon (Preview) The steps can be broken down into 4 parts,1 to 3 are about facing up, 4 to 6 are owning up, 7 to 9 are making up, 10 to 12 are keeping up. Twelve Steps1. We admitted we were powerless over alcoholthat our lives had become unmanageable.2. Came to believe that a Power greater t...	DM2021	3	1468	Mar 1, 2023 by Enigmatic
	looking for an online sponsor (Preview) Hi I live on a small island and am looking to find an online sponsor	SusannaMaria	5	4762	Feb 27, 2023 by Ralu
	ODAT in alanon, Monday, 2/27, why do they drink? (Preview) Why do they drink when they know it damages themself and the family? How do they justify drinking behavior--after all, they are suffering too? Reminder: Trying to analyze why another person persists in destructive behavior cannot help me out of my own difficulties. I can overcome them only by tu...	Lyne	2	1379	Feb 27, 2023 by SunnyFrog
	Hope for Today Feb 26 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Todays reading is on the topic of forgiveness. The writer begins by acknowledging that in his/her early days in the program, he/she did not feel the capacity for forgiveness. The writer also stated that he/she equated forgiveness with accepting unacceptable behavior. O...	yanksfan51	4	742	Feb 27, 2023 by DM2021
	First Post -- Would Very Much Appreciate Feedback (Thank You) domestic violence assault child endangerment (Preview) Hello, This is my first time posting here, but I have read many threads and they have been helpful in my journey in navigating life with an alcoholic spouse. I regularly attend Al-Anon meetings and rehab support groups, but I've yet to be able to discuss the below out of the shame and fear that it has caus...	tyt84	4	1109	Feb 26, 2023 by PosiesandPuppies
	Al-Anon 12 Tradions (Preview) Al-Anon's Twelve Traditions1. Our common welfare should come first; personal progress for the greatest number depends upon unity.2. For our group purpose there is but one authoritya loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servantsthey do not gove...	DM2021	2	1022	Feb 26, 2023 by SunnyFrog
	C2C for February 24, 2023 Grocery Shopping (Preview) Today's reading starts out with bringing to mind how it feels to go to the grocery store to find that the item(s) weexpect to be there are gone and that the grocer only needs to take inventory to realize that it is time to restock. For us taking the step to do an inventory on ourselves, by doing the 4th Step...	DM2021	3	997	Feb 26, 2023 by SunnyFrog
	Courage to Change Feb. 22 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on decision making. In the past, their desire to make decisions that got them exactly what they wanted prevented them from making decisions at all. In Al-Anon, the author learned that we can never know the outcomes of our decisions, we can only use...	Skorpi	3	541	Feb 23, 2023 by SunnyFrog
	2/21/23 ODAT Not Generating Trouble for Myself (Preview) 'We punish ourselves far more than life ever punishes us' begins today's reading, perhaps a startling claim for some. We may see this in action, however, when we observe the fearful thoughts that can arise in our mind around the alcoholic's behavior and consider the distress we feel as a result. Alan...	Enigmatic	2	678	Feb 21, 2023 by DM2021
	Remembering John F (Preview) February 17th marked six years since we lost the founder of this site, Miracles in Progress. The anniversary was noted on another MIP message board and I felt a need to acknowledge it here as well. The Al-Anon message board has been the most active at this site and I am forever grateful to John F for it's c...	tiredtonite	2	1332	Feb 21, 2023 by DM2021
	C2C, Monday, 2/20, standing in the way of recovery (Preview) Early on, the member learned that abuse of any kind was unacceptable. Each of us have choices, and we can set limits, give ourselves guidelines, etc. But it took several years to realize that it was they who were still abusing themself. In this case it was verbal abuse--calling themself homely, th...	Lyne	2	1330	Feb 20, 2023 by SunnyFrog
	Hope for Today Feb 19 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about how we can give any and all anxieties and troubles to our Higher Power. The writer describes growing up in an alcoholic home; her parents were unaware of so much that was happening to the extent that a babysitter abused her and life went on as if nothing had...	yanksfan51	3	1356	Feb 19, 2023 by DM2021
	C2C for February 17, 2023 Is About Faith (Preview) This day's reading reminds us that in Al-Anon when we feel at our lowest and most afraid is the time to realizethat our faith and prayer in and to our Higher Power can bring about the relief and answers we need. Todays Reminder: "I have an important part to play in my relationship with my Higher Power...	DM2021	2	1348	Feb 17, 2023 by Daffodils
	Forcing Solutions or Improving My Situation? (Preview) Hi All, I'm relatively new to actively being involved in Al-Anon, though I have known about aspects of it most of my life and I'm about to turn 61. I'm aware that I have a huge pattern of forcing solutions. It started when I was a very young child, as my mother, who has been sober for almost 50 years, starte...	freedomssong	2	1339	Feb 16, 2023 by Lyne
	2/14/23 The Gift of…Confusion? (Preview) Great perspective check today as we are asked to consider how confusion can be a gift. This can be when we feel we need to make a change but are uncertain as to what it should be. Confusion may be a sign of grace that helps me realize that it is not yet time to act. When we know more than we need to before it is ti...	Enigmatic	2	1324	Feb 15, 2023 by SunnyFrog
	C2C, Monday, 2/13, compare=despair (Preview) Every person is different, in alanon and elsewhere. Comparing ourselves to others is a defect of character and it causes self-dislike. Each of us have special qualities and we should not compare ourselves to anyone else's recovery. We are all doing the best we can. We offer an important contrib...	Lyne	1	1286	Feb 13, 2023 by DM2021
	C2C – February 10, 2023 – Replacing negatives with positives (Preview) The C2C reading today suggests that in order to help us in Al-Anon get past all the negativity that we have been living with due tothe disease of alcoholism and its affect on our personalities, that we replace those negative feelings towards ourselves with actionsthat are positive and/or creative....	DM2021	3	1350	Feb 12, 2023 by PosiesandPuppies
	Hope for Today Feb 12 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about how the climate in an alcoholic home can be one of division and separation. The writer describes seeing parents divided during arguments fueled by alcohol, siblings being divided when hearing why cant you be more like your brother or sister and divi...	yanksfan51	2	1335	Feb 12, 2023 by PosiesandPuppies
	Courage to Chnge Feb. 8 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on their friendships with people. The author notes that they sometimes reach out and try to be friends with people, even when those attempts are friendships are repeatedly rebuffed. The closing line at Al-Anon meetings ("though you may not like a...	Skorpi	2	543	Feb 9, 2023 by Daffodils
	C2C 29 September- Violence and personal responsibility. (Preview) Today's C2C speaks of violence, and of the fact that whilst al-anon does not give advice regarding staying or leaving relationships, but emphasises personal responsibility for our own safety and well-being. It reminds us that no matter how unfair, dangerous or harmful the behaviour of another is...	Youknowme	9	2024	Feb 8, 2023 by SunnyFrog
	Need guidance/advice (Preview) Hello, I'm sure my story is a familiar one. My husband of 4 years has always had a problem with drinking to excess. Previous to meeting me it resulted in serious cases of self harm. When we got together he seemed to turn a corner despite some back slides but I always made sure I was there for him, loved h...	Chinstrap	6	1484	Feb 7, 2023 by Fedora
	2/7/23 C2C One Small Step, and a Guarantee (Preview) Regardless of circumstances, we have the capability to take at least a small step towards a positive result or feeling notes this writer. This can be an action in the program, for someone else, addressing a health or emotional need of our own, something we fear, something that will recharge or stir o...	Enigmatic	3	1360	Feb 7, 2023 by Daffodils
	C2C, Monday, 2/6, Please wait (Preview) The newcomer to alanon is given a suggestion to wait 6 months before making any major decisions. Thinking can change dramatically after 6 months of program. At that time, the writer decided to continue to wait, to learn and to recover, before deciding about their relationship. But the writer ha...	Lyne	2	1308	Feb 7, 2023 by Enigmatic
	Hope for Today Feb 5 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is a focus on the slogan: think. As the writer points out, for many of us thinking (too much) is the problem. The intention of this one word slogan is to think before acting, think without acting impulsively, act with thoughtfulness, not reaction. The writer ha...	yanksfan51	1	1290	Feb 5, 2023 by PosiesandPuppies
	Hey All...Sharing my Life Updates (Preview) Hey all. It's been a while, a long while. Last I posted, I believe I was headed from KS to AZ to deal with my parents. I've made several trips back/forth trying to be of service -- so wish they lived closer. My mother passed away on New Year's Day so went out to be with my dad, clear things from the memory c...	Iamhere	12	1529	Feb 4, 2023 by PosiesandPuppies
	Forgiveness (Preview) I know there's already lots of topics on forgiveness but I wanted to create a new one. I have been praying,meditating ,using all the tools I know of trying to forgive and let go of past things that the A in my life did. Some of them just seem/feel unforgivable. Although I am no longer with him,this anger I s...	SunnyFrog	21	1016	Feb 3, 2023 by SunnyFrog
	C2C – February 3, 2023 – Al-Anon & Your HP (Preview) *I must warn you all you may find this long*! Today's C2C reading discusses how anyone new to Al-Anon expects that they will learn how to "cure" the alcoholic in their life. That the Al-Anon program will, in essence, produce their serenity, by easing all their past and present pain. What we soonlea...	DM2021	3	2150	Feb 3, 2023 by SunnyFrog
	1/31/23 C2C Hard Work: Necessary, but not Sufficient (Preview) This author worked hard learning and applying Alanon principles before falling prey to self pity and resentment over the perceived failures of the alcoholic to deliver emotional support. Meditation on Steps 6 and 7 shed light: were entirely ready, humbly asking higher power to remove our shortc...	Enigmatic	4	1325	Feb 2, 2023 by Taraxacum1
	Hope for Today, Monday, 1/30, obsession (Preview) This reading begins: " The alcoholic was obsessed with alcohol, and I was obsessed with the alcoholic.". The writer watched, monitored, controlled, felt hurt, self-pity, embarrassment, superiority, resentment, and anger. The writer also felt misery, wretchedness, and gloom, but eventuall...	Lyne	2	1307	Jan 30, 2023 by DM2021
	Hope for Today Jan 29 (22) (Preview) Good morning everyone- Last week I mistakenly wrote a reflection on todays date in Hope for Today, so todays reflection will be from Jan 22, in case you have the book and are reading as well. Todays reading is a focus on the al-anon suggestions to seek progress rather than perfection and to mind our own b...	yanksfan51	2	1409	Jan 29, 2023 by PosiesandPuppies
	C2C – January 27, 2023 - Ironing out those rough spots!! (Preview) The author of today's C2C reading suggests that one cannot make changes for a multitude of issues, in one day. That sometimes we find our selves so troubled over a small issue when in fact that small issue is just the strawthat broke the camel's back. Talking it out with an Al-Anon member or sponsor ca...	DM2021	3	2009	Jan 28, 2023 by Lyne
	A Credo of Detachment (Preview) A Credo of Detachment by Evelyn Leite You and I are in a relationship which I value and want to keep. Yet each of us is a separate person with his own unique needs and the right to try to meet those needs. I know that when you lash out at me in anger it is because you are in pain. I will try to have sympathy for...	shimo	11	5437	Jan 26, 2023 by PK
	Courage to Change January 25 (Preview) In today's reading, the author shares about how hard it was to talk about themselves in meetings initially, and how hard it was to focus on themselves, their feelings, their wants, and their needs. With the help of their sponsor, the author realized that they were overly interested in others because...	Skorpi	3	1305	Jan 26, 2023 by Daffodils
	1/24/23 ODAT Alcoholism – a Disease? (Preview) Today's page considers alcoholism as a disease, something that cannot be controlled by will power alone. If that is so, why do I perhaps act toward the alcoholic like it can be? Reminder - 'Arguments are useless against sickness.' Compassion and understanding are powerful and helpful because they...	Enigmatic	3	1385	Jan 25, 2023 by DM2021
	Being an older member and The Head of the Family in Al-Anon. (Preview) HI it's WendyP, at the moment I am going through a very stressful family issue, and feeling the effects of it, not being able to sleep, eat, etc, and because I am in that zone at the moment, and feeling like I am, I started to Question myself, if I was working my program, and not working my program. I started...	WendyP	4	1077	Jan 25, 2023 by DM2021
	Infidelity (Preview) My AH is now sober and active in AA. I found out that he cheated on me for years with different women and I am having so much trouble forgiving him. Is there anything in Al-anon that can specifically help with cheating or would I find a therapist?	Drpc	3	750	Jan 24, 2023 by DM2021
	Hope for Today, Monday, 1/23, maintaining an attitude of gratitude (Preview) Today's writer is exploring how to understand and keep an attitude of gratitude. It isn't when life happens the way we want, nor a high from instant gratification. Instead, it has been learned that gratitude is an integral part of serenity, and it is often the means to restoring serenity. Gratitu...	Lyne	4	566	Jan 23, 2023 by Daffodils
	Hope for Today Jan 29 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Todays reading is a look at the difference between our responsibilities and the responsibilities we take on out of some sense of obligation. The writer begins with a comparison between how the responsibility and authority of Al-anon world services belongs to al-anon grou...	yanksfan51	4	532	Jan 22, 2023 by serenity47
	Wrong date for hope for today ! (Preview) Apologies everybody- I wrote about the writing for 1/29. Next week I will double back and write about 1/22. sorry- the last thing I want to do is wish time away! m	yanksfan51	1	1126	Jan 22, 2023 by DM2021
	C2C – January 20, 2023 (Preview) In today's reading it is about the spiritual foundation of one of Al-Anon's Traditions, "anonymity."The author tries to impress on the reader the importance of both the members and the alcoholicsanonymity and the obligation membership has to provide for each other a safe, free from labelsenviro...	DM2021	1	1317	Jan 21, 2023 by Lyne
	Woohoo! And a question (Preview) Me here. I had to make yet another new account. I'm so sorry- I must have 6 or 7 now. My computer was destroyed yesterday in a random electrical event (I am so sad about it, it's an expensive nightmare) and when I tried to log in from my old laptop it didn't have my details. I wasn't able to recover my password...	youknowme2	3	1339	Jan 20, 2023 by Enigmatic
	Courage to Change January 18 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shared that they almost didn't come back to Al-Anon when they heard that the best way to help an alcoholic was to focus on oneself. The author interpreted Al-Anon as a heartless place, and a place that would force them to stop caring about their loved ones. The a...	Skorpi	4	1304	Jan 19, 2023 by El
	Legal system - Sanctioned Gaslighting - Looking for my own pot of courage. (Preview) Recently my ex Spouse managed to get his second (of 3) DUIs dismissed. This despite a staggeringly awful police report, and the fact that he couldn't even show up to the arraignment because he was in the hospital for alcohol withdrawl. And yet the legal system is very happy to ignore the fact that he dr...	Fedora	9	1462	Jan 19, 2023 by luv123
	Putting My Son In Your Carre (Preview) I found this so helpful from the Al-anon website and thought I would share it. May have been shared in the past but is a gem worth repeating and re-reading (for me maybe daily right about now) Love to all! LUV123 FIND AT: https://al-anon.org/blog/im-putting-son-care/ Im Putting My Son in Your C...	luv123	3	1567	Jan 18, 2023 by SunnyFrog
	1/17/23 C2C - Restored to Sanity (Preview) This honest writer admitted they would likely be judged insane if observed while interacting with the alcoholic. A combination of poor behavior and poor state of mind were the results of trying to control alcohol with reason or force of will. Restoration of sanity was the promise, a higher power wa...	Enigmatic	2	1387	Jan 17, 2023 by Lyne
	Hope for Today, Monday, 1/16, understanding humility (Preview) Today's writer did not understand the concept of humility nor how to develop it. Being teachable becomes an important aspect, and to accomplish this, listening is an extremely important skill. It also involves being open to what you hear. The alanon program works as long as we stay open, honest,...	Lyne	3	1308	Jan 17, 2023 by Enigmatic
	Wahoo!! (Preview) Had two chemo treatments to my bladder 3 months ago, was suppose to have 6 but was allergic to it and it was stopped. Read that in my case two treatments could do the trick. Well saw the urologist this morning and my bladder is cancer free!!!! Wahoo!!! Just had to share!!! {{HUGS}}	DM2021	8	1474	Jan 15, 2023 by Fedora
	Hope for Today Jan 15 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about what brings us to Al-Anon in the first place, and what we might learn about ourselves once we are here. The writer describes coming to the program because of her husbands drinking. What she had trouble understanding once there, was why she was answering...	yanksfan51	2	1346	Jan 15, 2023 by Fedora
	Morning Pages (Faith / HP Letters) (Preview) HI All, I was at a meeting in another state and I heard about this group of Al-anon members that wrote daily letters to God/HP and shared them with each other each day. I began doing it most days. Sounded like a good way to stay on top of communicating with each other, HP and a kind of tenth step/prayer...	luv123	2	1323	Jan 14, 2023 by Lyne
	C2C – January 13, 2023 (Preview) In today's C2C reading the author marvels at how once they established their faith in a God/HP, how centered/grounded their life became. Al-Anon helps and guides us to work at creating a personal connection to our individual faith and relationship with our Higher Powerbecause once we do, we will f...	DM2021	4	999	Jan 13, 2023 by DM2021
	I'm back (Preview) I haven't been active in al-anon for many years. I finally left my AH in 2015. Sadly, just months later he was found deceased in our dream home...overdose. I have spent all these years since then working on myself and getting stronger while continuing to nurture and raise our two children (who are no...	imom	5	994	Jan 13, 2023 by Enigmatic
	The Bridge... (Preview) This was posted here on MIP when I first began lurking six years ago. It convinced me to crawl into my first al-anon meeting.... Letting Go of Those Not in Recovery We can go forward with our life (and recoveries) even though someone we love is not yet recovering. Picture a bridge. On one side of the b...	glad lee	11	1663	Jan 12, 2023 by DM2021
	Courage to Change January 11 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares about their new family - a family in which they are free to be themselves, a family where love isn't a point system, where the author is accepted for who they are and masking isn't needed. When the author faces a problem this second family empathizes, bu...	Skorpi	2	498	Jan 12, 2023 by Daffodils
	Question about Boundaries (Preview) My 22 yr old daughter completed her 4th rehab 11/30 and moved into sober living. She hates it and wants to come home. We had a family session with her counselor (she is doing PHP) last week where I said that I am not comfortable with her returning just yet and need more time (she has returned home 3 prior t...	mamamary1964	5	678	Jan 11, 2023 by mamamary1964
	things aren't always as they seem(sad) (Preview) Things aren't always as they seem I guess. I am finding more about my husband of 23 years. It turns out he was a very sick man & I didn't know how sick. He had a lot of memories that weren't actually truths. He shared a lot w/ me but I am saddened to see that he had a lot of memories that might not have been how...	Hoot Nanny	3	694	Jan 11, 2023 by Lyne
	1/10/23 C2C If I Could Put Time (spent in fear & worry) in a Bottle… (Preview) ...this author would have a lot of time in bottles that they didn't enjoy, having spent it in criticism, paranoia, self-criticism rather than useful accomplishment. To break the cycle of 'mental static', they: * got out of the regrets of past and fears of future, * learned to stay in and enjoy the pre...	Enigmatic	3	871	Jan 11, 2023 by Daffodils
	Hope for Today Jan 8 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about how prayer and meditation is helpful as a focus for the solutions to problems in our lives. The writer describes that having continuous communication with God was not an issue. The writer was also able to tune out distractions easily. Yet the writer was...	yanksfan51	3	1327	Jan 10, 2023 by Enigmatic
	My Brother Ruined Christmas Again, and other stories. (Preview) Hi everyone. Sorry I have abandoned my daily and haven't been around. There is a lot going on and I haven't felt very positive or like sharing with anyone. Honestly I feel defeated and sad and out of mojo. The situation with my brother has deteriorated a lot. I missed Christmas last year as my son-in-law...	Youknowme	3	602	Jan 10, 2023 by Enigmatic
	Hope for Today, Monday, 1/9, Whose fault is my suffering? (Preview) The writer believed that the alcoholics caused their pain, suffering, and great unhappiness. But alanon suggested we take responsibility for our own happiness. The writer's sponsor thought it best to stop expecting the alcoholic's behavior to change. Instead, detach and change one's own at...	Lyne	3	1345	Jan 9, 2023 by Daffodils
	C2C – January 5, 2023 (Preview) The author of todays reading discusses how to tell the difference between compassion for the alcoholic and enabling their bad behavior. They point out that it is not always clear but that looking at their motives for the intervention in that situation is helpful. Will interfering change the outc...	DM2021	5	2115	Jan 7, 2023 by Daffodils
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.