Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

"How Important Is it?" That is what the daily is about. This simple slogan. The author recalls that after living in the chaos of an alcoholic relationship, it can be hard to know the difference between a minor inconvenience and a major crisis. This slogan helps many of us to regain some sense of proport...

Paloma Negra · Paloma Negra

Hello again and I'm glad to be checking in with some positive changes but confusing choices are involved. I'm asking for ESH here because I fear that time won't permit me a lot of self examination on this. It's lengthy and I'll try to keep it as short as possible. After 9 years, I've made the terrible deci...

Freetime · Freetime

In Al-Anon, today's author discovered that they had choices -- that if they felt uncomfortable with something, they could try to discover their true feelings before making a decision. Also, with things that truly have to be done but we don't want to, we have to feel our feelings and then do the thing a...

Iamhere · Iamhere

"Sponsorship is a friendship made up of two members learning from one another, two people learning a new way to live - one day at a time." ~~~~ from Sponsorship--What It's All About Today's Reminder: Have I put someone on a pedestal? Am I encouraging anyone to have an exaggerated view of me? Al-Anon he...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on step 3 - turning my will over to a Higher Power. The author feels a true sense of surrender when they take step 3. This sense of surrender is like the one the author felt when their sister was diagnosed with a brain tumor. The author was frustrated by t...

DavidG · DavidG

In the day our town had burgeoning Alanon and AA groups. I helped an AA member to start up a second AA group. It operated in its first years as a combined Steps Group. The gummint were building a huge dam downtime river from here. The workers were state employees- and they had a support and assis...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

When I am feeling trapped or unhappy with my circumstances, today's reading accurately predicts my tendency to seek change in people and things around me in an attempt to find happiness. Serenity, however, comes only when I make changes in myself by adjusting attitudes that act to keep me chained to...

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday, 8/10, compares alanon to the Bible in regards to how we use our words: The stroke of the tongue breaketh bones. Envy and wrath shorten life. Alanon reminds us that we work to improve ourselves, and to protect ourselves from confusion, anger, and resentment. We are reminde...

Maresie888 · Maresie888

I am in a whole other place on.denial. When I come up.against other people's denial I.am not able to see how long tetm it.is Moreover I am not able to respect it. I spent decades in therapy raging against my.sister's denial. I mean years and years just on my family of origin (which was of course violent...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

Hi All, I recently visited with a friend whose son is currently staying with them due to having limited employment. My friend and I have been friends more than fifteen years. We visited outside her home and we social distanced. Her family was home but inside the home at the time. My friend's son has some...

iris52 · iris52

My sober husband ( 30 years) has dementia and I am currently working at moving him to a nursing home.During these difficult times in the country, and world, everything moves much more slowly.Meanwhile I am finding new ways to reduce the stress on me for the constant care he needs.One day a strange thou...

DavidG · DavidG

This is a great place to learn boundaries. Not so much personal boundaries- but group boundaries... and small 'p' group politics. Being in a place where we get to get stuff done... and where, after years of internal battling, get to do stuff together... :D I am baching at home, at the moment. '...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone: Todays reading is about how the program honors all who would like to be heard, and also does not impose opinions on others. The writer describes having come into the program with very low levels of self esteem. He/she does not feel any value, and was convinced anything he/she sa...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

Good morning (or afternoon) MIP Family! Today's reading from C2C is about Step 6 - Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character. "In Step 6 I contemplate my life undergoing change -- tremendous change. The great fear is this: If I shed many characteristics that stand in my wh...

DavidG · DavidG

Steps 10,11,12... The sun is streaming through my window, as I write. Gratitude is a great asset... and it does start with baby steps- we fake it til we make it. Our national programme radio playing in the background... wallpaper. 5 or 6 years ago I still thought and believed that I was 'god's gift to...

Maresie888 · Maresie888

I grew up in a family where anything could happen any minute. Violence was common, alcohol, gamblimg, projection were all.ways they managed their turmoil. I have no idea how I survived that. Somehow I did. So you.would think growimg up like that that I would be able to live quite normally in these t...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Tomorrow's Courage to Change is about courage. The page discusses hesitating at times, hoping for a miracle, instead of trusting Higher Power. We often forget that the miracle is already here. With Al-Anon recovery, we each have a Higher Power who is always here for us, helping us to cope with fea...

Freetime · Freetime

Unable to be true to oneself, letting people take advantage in order to please them -- and then feeling either depressed or guilty -- the author was walking this tightrope. As a result of working the Al-Anon program, the author discovered their rights as a person: the right to speak without being int...

DavidG · DavidG

Would I walk into someone's home- without knocking? Without an invitation? Here, in this group I do do a certain amount of personal messaging. It is a really good practise in boundaries. We too have white board messaging as well- which anyone can see. In another group there was a discussion about l...

mamalioness · mamalioness

Hope is the companion of power, and mother of success; for who sohopes strongly has within him the gift of miracles.--Samuel SmilesIt is better to live one day wisely and reflectively than to live ahundred years in ignorance and indulgence."--BuddhaWithout forgiveness life is governed...by an e...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading from C2C, the author reflects on resentments. Prior to Al-Anon, resentments occupied and poisoned most of the author's waking moments. The author could think about resentments for days, weeks, months, or years, constantly justifying why they felt the way they did a...

DavidG · DavidG

8.b. Made a list of those who had harmed us and vowed to get even. I can picture an old timer i knew- with hands on her hips- and saying:- "now what have we got here? !!!" In the USA people might have a sponsor- and do the steps away from the group. Larger groups seem to be a place where people come to show-ca...

Bettertomorrow · Bettertomorrow

Dear All, I would appreciate your support please as I am feeling emotionally very low. I have been living with my active AH while we have been saving some money for us to separate. Unfortunately his behaviour has become more and more unacceptable and I have asked him to leave this week on Tuesday (to ...

sunmustshine · sunmustshine

Anyone have stories to share about divorcing an alcoholic mentally abusive spouse who refuse to work and children were involved? Im at the point of wanting out or maybe I could just say reality. Ive watched many out patient and inpatient attempts end the same way. I feel like Ive been kidding myself t...

mamalioness · mamalioness

You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Vulnerability I've learned that the more vulnerable I allow myself to be, the more in control of myself I really am. --Anonymous Melodie Beattie talks about how many of us can only be strong...stiff upper lip...always confident, we believe t...

cestlavie · cestlavie

Hi! Pretty new to this end of the forum. I'm on the ACOA side moreso. Recently my sister has relapsed after 25 years sober. It's a long story, but hard drugs also involved in this relapse, which lasted for about a year. At the time I was focused on being there for her as I could and tried hard not to enable. Be...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

We may feel they are justified, we may feel we have the right to hold them, but today's reading reminds us that it is from our expectations of others that much of our unhappiness, frustration, and anger may spring.Reminder: Expecting others to follow our determination of what 'should' be done interf...

DavidG · DavidG

My growing years were fraught. If anything was said:- it seemed to be said through clinched teeth. Moves were like that too- Clint Eastwood spittoon out the end of a cheroot... ...but most movies and books had happy endings- or were meant to. My nearest group- is having a Sunday get together towar...

lookingup · lookingup

been along time away from here, been missing everyone,,life gets super busy. im doing fine,still working my program always will. i have a question to ask ,hoping it can be done. ive got alot of messages here ,private messages between myself and ms betty from way back 2015 up to 2019. im wanting to save t...

mamalioness · mamalioness

been TRYING without much success to SLOW down and PAY attention as I self sabotage big time....I think I had to disassociate from my body too long and now I don't know how to be in it....so not online very much......trying to just teach me to STOP and BREATH....break this down in chunks....then when I ca...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Today is a day to practice easy does it! I spent my entire weekend stressing. Now I want to start anew. I can't count totally depend on counseling to make my decisions but I can try to figure it out on my own. I will stand back & do the footwork when I can. I am hoping today I can share things other than what...

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday, 8/3, discusses when it is time to make a self-appraisal. This happens when our own thoughts create turmoil. We are reminded that our first obligation is to work out our own thinking patterns. The reminder says we can change nothing but ourselves, and the principal source o...

SunnyFrogs · SunnyFrogs

A boundary I have set for myself,quite awhile ago,is I refuse to be around AH when he's drinking. It's so different when he drinks compared to other substances and I just simply don't want to be around him when he does. With this pandemic, there's not a lot of options. Oh,and with this extreme heat on to...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all ... My ultimate gurus are Lois and Bill. They have pop star and film star status for me. I have their photo on the wall. But for a long time I wanted to be a guru and leader too! Not surprising since I used Bill's saying a lot. One that appears in the AA Big Book. "Half measures avail us nothing....

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Such a great page today in Courage, sums up how so many of us got here but more importantly: how to get to a better place. I came here to change others, but found out I needed to change myself...practice the 12 Steps of AA in my own life, develop a higher power, and accept that I am responsible for the serenit...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about the power of prayer, and the idea that we have the ability to pray in many different ways, in different places, and at any time. The writer begins with a description of how sleeping patterns have changed for him/her. The writer describes the inability...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

Happy August! Today I will be pulling directly from The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie. "Say thank you, until you mean it. Thank God, life, and the universe for everyone and everything sent your way. Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life.It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns...

DavidG · DavidG

I say this more times than often. Even as i grow older- much older... Through my 20's my girls friends got rougher and tougher. In my steps 8 and 9 I took account of these people. Being a country lad- I was much slower on the uptake than my urban counterparts- and I could name each one of them. Doing Step...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Today is a good day just to send out my random thoughts. I realized after reading some of my story that I have an idea. It seems like I can truly say that I can name naming, then I blame blaming & then shame shaming. Now I am claim claiming the fact that I came up w/these thoughts. Maybe this isn't exactly...

DavidG · DavidG

My home relationship has improved markedly over the last 18 to 24 months. Not quite where I want it- but getting fairly close... I am working part time. SO came home from work and found an element on on the stove. It had been like that since breakfast- so it must have been on very low. She put some toasti...

Maresie888 · Maresie888

Every day at work I sign s statement that I am feeling well and can work. This oricess is repea4ed when I get to work. So it is twice.once when I check in. Once when I get screened Yesterday I called off. I have been working a lot.lately. my fatigue kevel was high Todsy I get a mote saying ny absence was un...

Freetime · Freetime

The author remembered reading a magazine article stating that the correct use of the mind leads to wisdom and the incorrect use of the mind mind leads to insanity. When coming into Al-Anon, the author realized that the core of the program was based on the right use of the mind as well as the heart. The au...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP. Today's reading talks about decisions and choices we can make to be happy. We have all heard that happiness is an inside job, and that we can be as happy as we choose to me. While we all recognize it's unrealistic to be happy all the time, we can be happy most of the time if we make a commi...

Skorpi · Skorpi

In today's reading, the author reflects on the spiritual nature of the Al-Anon program. Al-Anon is not based on any particular religion, and no religious belief is required. There is not a specific dogma or philosophy. The important part is believing in a power greater than ourselves. We need this h...

Maresie888 · Maresie888

I have been working briefly with a coworker who compulsively lies. His lies are not anything that can affect my.job I spent years with the qualifier who lied comoulsively. He lied about crashing the car repeatedly (which I paid for). He lied about working, where he was, virtually anything he was res...

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday, 7/27, asks the question: If alcoholism/addictions did not exist, would marriages and all other relationships be perfect? And of course the answer is no: sobriety does not end all problems. It is true that alcoholism does wreck marriages that might have otherwise been s...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I really hope this doesn't get old. I am writing my life story as I speak. It has been over a year since I started in early July last year. It is very detailed & I hope it doesn't get too boring! I feel very exited about my memories! I really have a good story to tell--the whole truth! I feel like maybe I sh...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

Good morning MIP family! Today's reading talks about Courage. The author talks about after years and years of letting people take advantage of them, they had come to Al-Anon with quite a store of anger, resentment and guilt. So many times they wanted to "bite off their tongue" for saying "Yes," when w...

pinkchip · pinkchip

11 plus years sober. Was very sad to hear of Betty's passing. Working daily still as rehab is "essential" healthcare. It is crazy cuz I have plenty of exposure to barely recovering or relapsing people but now limited AA (and Alanon). BUT...on the flip side....still have a job and income and more likel...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

AlAnon is a spiritual recovery program that yields miracles after persistent, consistent thought and effort. This can be compared to the work of a stone cutter who may strike a stone 99 times with no apparent effect before the rewarding break on the 100th. Acceptance of Alcoholism as a disease, acce...

Toronto · Toronto

Good Afternoon All. Earlier I waded in on a post without properly introducing myself. My intent was not to offend, but share how applying Alanon priciples have enriched my life. I entered AA recovery 25 years ago when my then hubby kicked me to the curb. Smart man. He cut his losses quickly. I was in...

Christiob · Christiob

Ive been dragged into my alcoholic siblings problem for the last several months. It started as helping her get to detox (more than once) and once to rehab (she was sober for maybe 30 days after the rehab). Two months ago she had a bad fall and broke her arm, so needed help at home for awhile and has been un...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'a'll... Having this group here, and the MIP groups generally has been a great boon for me. It has taken me beyond the possible... as it was... ...I needed 3 or 4 meetings a week at times- and had none. The bonus here is that we have some of the high motivation members- from different corn...

SunnyFrogs · SunnyFrogs

I know in "that other thread" I said I doubted I would ever be logging in again,yet here I am. I actually logged in because I was going to apologize for the things I said because I wasn't feeling good about myself for it. I felt like I was wrong in what I said and felt I didn't have the right to say what I thought...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about the twelve concepts and general warranties of the program. I will admit I dont know a lot about this except when they have been referred to in a meeting. The writer connects the warranties with being able adjust attitudes in relation to making decision...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

I thought I posted this! So sorry everyone. It was sitting here waiting to go as I got ready to write today. What day is it again???? My apologies. Heres last weeks writing: Good morning Everyone: Today?s reading is about our growth toward self sufficiency. Many of us who grew up in alcoholism or h...

foriver · foriver

Hi friends, I've gotten to a point where I don't know if what I'm doing/feeling is considered detaching "with love" or just plain I don't care anymore. I've been with my A for 5.5 years and we have a 1.5 year old daughter together. He relapses every few weeks - months. Never sober longer than 11 months...

DavidG · DavidG

Was in the city last week. At a hearing over child care and protection. I had to flick back- and see if I was repeating myself- and I was just about to. Getting into the present moment has been really hard for me. I was so much caught up between the "if only's" and the what if's. And i had a really big d...

Freetime · Freetime

I am posting very early for Friday -- I have a busy couple of days coming up. Today's page in One Day At A Time in Al-Anon reminds us how it feels to be a newcomer, and how we can best support newcomers. The newcomer usually feels alone in a hostile world, drowning in a sea of troubles. We need to guard agai...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

It has been 54 years since I came to this planet & I never had it so good! All the blessings & positive thoughts for me are far from evident. I really feel that I deserve them & the friends I have met over the years who have been w/ me almost a life time. I have been so blessed w/ all of you that take m...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Courage to Change 08/15/2020 (Preview) "How Important Is it?" That is what the daily is about. This simple slogan. The author recalls that after living in the chaos of an alcoholic relationship, it can be hard to know the difference between a minor inconvenience and a major crisis. This slogan helps many of us to regain some sense of proport...	PosiesandPuppies	4	543	Aug 15, 2020 by Iamhere
	Moving forward but to where? (Preview) Hello again and I'm glad to be checking in with some positive changes but confusing choices are involved. I'm asking for ESH here because I fear that time won't permit me a lot of self examination on this. It's lengthy and I'll try to keep it as short as possible. After 9 years, I've made the terrible deci...	Paloma Negra	5	734	Aug 15, 2020 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change 8/14 (Preview) In Al-Anon, today's author discovered that they had choices -- that if they felt uncomfortable with something, they could try to discover their true feelings before making a decision. Also, with things that truly have to be done but we don't want to, we have to feel our feelings and then do the thing a...	Freetime	4	548	Aug 14, 2020 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change 8/13 (Preview) "Sponsorship is a friendship made up of two members learning from one another, two people learning a new way to live - one day at a time." ~~~~ from Sponsorship--What It's All About Today's Reminder: Have I put someone on a pedestal? Am I encouraging anyone to have an exaggerated view of me? Al-Anon he...	Iamhere	4	719	Aug 14, 2020 by DavidG
	Courage to Change August 12 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on step 3 - turning my will over to a Higher Power. The author feels a true sense of surrender when they take step 3. This sense of surrender is like the one the author felt when their sister was diagnosed with a brain tumor. The author was frustrated by t...	Skorpi	5	655	Aug 13, 2020 by Enigmatic
	Old Stuff- learning to live well... (Preview) In the day our town had burgeoning Alanon and AA groups. I helped an AA member to start up a second AA group. It operated in its first years as a combined Steps Group. The gummint were building a huge dam downtime river from here. The workers were state employees- and they had a support and assis...	DavidG	4	583	Aug 12, 2020 by DavidG
	8/11/20 ODAT Changing Ourselves, Not Others (Preview) When I am feeling trapped or unhappy with my circumstances, today's reading accurately predicts my tendency to seek change in people and things around me in an attempt to find happiness. Serenity, however, comes only when I make changes in myself by adjusting attitudes that act to keep me chained to...	Enigmatic	5	641	Aug 11, 2020 by Iamhere
	ODAT in alanon, 8/10 (Preview) The reading for Monday, 8/10, compares alanon to the Bible in regards to how we use our words: The stroke of the tongue breaketh bones. Envy and wrath shorten life. Alanon reminds us that we work to improve ourselves, and to protect ourselves from confusion, anger, and resentment. We are reminde...	Lyne	4	585	Aug 10, 2020 by Iamhere
	Denial denial denial (Preview) I am in a whole other place on.denial. When I come up.against other people's denial I.am not able to see how long tetm it.is Moreover I am not able to respect it. I spent decades in therapy raging against my.sister's denial. I mean years and years just on my family of origin (which was of course violent...	Maresie888	5	630	Aug 10, 2020 by Lyne
	Self Respect (Preview) Hi All, I recently visited with a friend whose son is currently staying with them due to having limited employment. My friend and I have been friends more than fifteen years. We visited outside her home and we social distanced. Her family was home but inside the home at the time. My friend's son has some...	tiredtonite	10	934	Aug 9, 2020 by Maresie888
	new revelation (Preview) My sober husband ( 30 years) has dementia and I am currently working at moving him to a nursing home.During these difficult times in the country, and world, everything moves much more slowly.Meanwhile I am finding new ways to reduce the stress on me for the constant care he needs.One day a strange thou...	iris52	4	712	Aug 9, 2020 by Maresie888
	Sunday share... (Preview) This is a great place to learn boundaries. Not so much personal boundaries- but group boundaries... and small 'p' group politics. Being in a place where we get to get stuff done... and where, after years of internal battling, get to do stuff together... :D I am baching at home, at the moment. '...	DavidG	1	576	Aug 9, 2020 by PosiesandPuppies
	Hope for Today Aug 9 (Preview) Good morning Everyone: Todays reading is about how the program honors all who would like to be heard, and also does not impose opinions on others. The writer describes having come into the program with very low levels of self esteem. He/she does not feel any value, and was convinced anything he/she sa...	yanksfan51	2	552	Aug 9, 2020 by PosiesandPuppies
	Courage to Change 8/8/20 (Preview) Good morning (or afternoon) MIP Family! Today's reading from C2C is about Step 6 - Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character. "In Step 6 I contemplate my life undergoing change -- tremendous change. The great fear is this: If I shed many characteristics that stand in my wh...	PosiesandPuppies	2	530	Aug 9, 2020 by Lyne
	A Saturday share... (Preview) Steps 10,11,12... The sun is streaming through my window, as I write. Gratitude is a great asset... and it does start with baby steps- we fake it til we make it. Our national programme radio playing in the background... wallpaper. 5 or 6 years ago I still thought and believed that I was 'god's gift to...	DavidG	2	547	Aug 8, 2020 by DavidG
	Tevising expectations (Preview) I grew up in a family where anything could happen any minute. Violence was common, alcohol, gamblimg, projection were all.ways they managed their turmoil. I have no idea how I survived that. Somehow I did. So you.would think growimg up like that that I would be able to live quite normally in these t...	Maresie888	6	613	Aug 8, 2020 by Maresie888
	Courage to Change 8/6 (Preview) Tomorrow's Courage to Change is about courage. The page discusses hesitating at times, hoping for a miracle, instead of trusting Higher Power. We often forget that the miracle is already here. With Al-Anon recovery, we each have a Higher Power who is always here for us, helping us to cope with fea...	Iamhere	4	561	Aug 7, 2020 by PosiesandPuppies
	Hope For Today - August 7 (Preview) Unable to be true to oneself, letting people take advantage in order to please them -- and then feeling either depressed or guilty -- the author was walking this tightrope. As a result of working the Al-Anon program, the author discovered their rights as a person: the right to speak without being int...	Freetime	3	577	Aug 7, 2020 by Lyne
	Personal messaging here- does or don'ts? (Preview) Would I walk into someone's home- without knocking? Without an invitation? Here, in this group I do do a certain amount of personal messaging. It is a really good practise in boundaries. We too have white board messaging as well- which anyone can see. In another group there was a discussion about l...	DavidG	6	698	Aug 6, 2020 by DavidG
	TID BITS OF WISDOM_WEDNESDAY (Preview) Hope is the companion of power, and mother of success; for who sohopes strongly has within him the gift of miracles.--Samuel SmilesIt is better to live one day wisely and reflectively than to live ahundred years in ignorance and indulgence."--BuddhaWithout forgiveness life is governed...by an e...	mamalioness	1	522	Aug 6, 2020 by PosiesandPuppies
	Courage to Change August 5 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading from C2C, the author reflects on resentments. Prior to Al-Anon, resentments occupied and poisoned most of the author's waking moments. The author could think about resentments for days, weeks, months, or years, constantly justifying why they felt the way they did a...	Skorpi	3	686	Aug 5, 2020 by DavidG
	Step 8, in reverse... tradition 4, too... (Preview) 8.b. Made a list of those who had harmed us and vowed to get even. I can picture an old timer i knew- with hands on her hips- and saying:- "now what have we got here? !!!" In the USA people might have a sponsor- and do the steps away from the group. Larger groups seem to be a place where people come to show-ca...	DavidG	0	589	Aug 5, 2020 by DavidG
	Support needed please (Preview) Dear All, I would appreciate your support please as I am feeling emotionally very low. I have been living with my active AH while we have been saving some money for us to separate. Unfortunately his behaviour has become more and more unacceptable and I have asked him to leave this week on Tuesday (to ...	Bettertomorrow	11	706	Aug 5, 2020 by PosiesandPuppies
	Need ESH (Preview) Anyone have stories to share about divorcing an alcoholic mentally abusive spouse who refuse to work and children were involved? Im at the point of wanting out or maybe I could just say reality. Ive watched many out patient and inpatient attempts end the same way. I feel like Ive been kidding myself t...	sunmustshine	3	610	Aug 5, 2020 by Bettertomorrow
	Language of Letting go_Aug 4_ Vulnerability (Preview) You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Vulnerability I've learned that the more vulnerable I allow myself to be, the more in control of myself I really am. --Anonymous Melodie Beattie talks about how many of us can only be strong...stiff upper lip...always confident, we believe t...	mamalioness	0	551	Aug 4, 2020 by mamalioness
	Boundaries (Preview) Hi! Pretty new to this end of the forum. I'm on the ACOA side moreso. Recently my sister has relapsed after 25 years sober. It's a long story, but hard drugs also involved in this relapse, which lasted for about a year. At the time I was focused on being there for her as I could and tried hard not to enable. Be...	cestlavie	3	671	Aug 4, 2020 by Iamhere
	8/4/20 ODAT - Expectations: A Source of Unhappiness (Preview) We may feel they are justified, we may feel we have the right to hold them, but today's reading reminds us that it is from our expectations of others that much of our unhappiness, frustration, and anger may spring.Reminder: Expecting others to follow our determination of what 'should' be done interf...	Enigmatic	4	726	Aug 4, 2020 by Iamhere
	Kicking back and talking about stuff... (Preview) My growing years were fraught. If anything was said:- it seemed to be said through clinched teeth. Moves were like that too- Clint Eastwood spittoon out the end of a cheroot... ...but most movies and books had happy endings- or were meant to. My nearest group- is having a Sunday get together towar...	DavidG	1	569	Aug 4, 2020 by mamalioness
	Hi Everyone, (Preview) been along time away from here, been missing everyone,,life gets super busy. im doing fine,still working my program always will. i have a question to ask ,hoping it can be done. ive got alot of messages here ,private messages between myself and ms betty from way back 2015 up to 2019. im wanting to save t...	lookingup	4	621	Aug 3, 2020 by lookingup
	HP, I THINK I've learned this lesson (Preview) been TRYING without much success to SLOW down and PAY attention as I self sabotage big time....I think I had to disassociate from my body too long and now I don't know how to be in it....so not online very much......trying to just teach me to STOP and BREATH....break this down in chunks....then when I ca...	mamalioness	5	636	Aug 3, 2020 by mamalioness
	easy does it! (Preview) Today is a day to practice easy does it! I spent my entire weekend stressing. Now I want to start anew. I can't count totally depend on counseling to make my decisions but I can try to figure it out on my own. I will stand back & do the footwork when I can. I am hoping today I can share things other than what...	Hoot Nanny	1	572	Aug 3, 2020 by Iamhere
	One Day at a Time in Alanon, 8/3 (Preview) The reading for Monday, 8/3, discusses when it is time to make a self-appraisal. This happens when our own thoughts create turmoil. We are reminded that our first obligation is to work out our own thinking patterns. The reminder says we can change nothing but ourselves, and the principal source o...	Lyne	5	633	Aug 3, 2020 by DavidG
	Where Do You Go? (Preview) A boundary I have set for myself,quite awhile ago,is I refuse to be around AH when he's drinking. It's so different when he drinks compared to other substances and I just simply don't want to be around him when he does. With this pandemic, there's not a lot of options. Oh,and with this extreme heat on to...	SunnyFrogs	18	711	Aug 2, 2020 by PosiesandPuppies
	Sunday sharing... dream dreaming... (Preview) Hi y'all ... My ultimate gurus are Lois and Bill. They have pop star and film star status for me. I have their photo on the wall. But for a long time I wanted to be a guru and leader too! Not surprising since I used Bill's saying a lot. One that appears in the AA Big Book. "Half measures avail us nothing....	DavidG	4	553	Aug 2, 2020 by PosiesandPuppies
	8/1 C2C - What Is AlAnon About (Preview) Such a great page today in Courage, sums up how so many of us got here but more importantly: how to get to a better place. I came here to change others, but found out I needed to change myself...practice the 12 Steps of AA in my own life, develop a higher power, and accept that I am responsible for the serenit...	Enigmatic	5	666	Aug 2, 2020 by PosiesandPuppies
	Hope for Today August 2 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about the power of prayer, and the idea that we have the ability to pray in many different ways, in different places, and at any time. The writer begins with a description of how sleeping patterns have changed for him/her. The writer describes the inability...	yanksfan51	2	634	Aug 2, 2020 by PosiesandPuppies
	Saturday's Daily 08/01/2020 (Preview) Happy August! Today I will be pulling directly from The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie. "Say thank you, until you mean it. Thank God, life, and the universe for everyone and everything sent your way. Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life.It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns...	PosiesandPuppies	2	592	Aug 2, 2020 by mamalioness
	Relationships... (Preview) I say this more times than often. Even as i grow older- much older... Through my 20's my girls friends got rougher and tougher. In my steps 8 and 9 I took account of these people. Being a country lad- I was much slower on the uptake than my urban counterparts- and I could name each one of them. Doing Step...	DavidG	6	654	Aug 1, 2020 by Maresie888
	just want to share of few thoughts. (Preview) Today is a good day just to send out my random thoughts. I realized after reading some of my story that I have an idea. It seems like I can truly say that I can name naming, then I blame blaming & then shame shaming. Now I am claim claiming the fact that I came up w/these thoughts. Maybe this isn't exactly...	Hoot Nanny	2	584	Aug 1, 2020 by Lyne
	Gaslighting, par excellence... (Preview) My home relationship has improved markedly over the last 18 to 24 months. Not quite where I want it- but getting fairly close... I am working part time. SO came home from work and found an element on on the stove. It had been like that since breakfast- so it must have been on very low. She put some toasti...	DavidG	4	600	Jul 31, 2020 by JerryF
	Double binds (Preview) Every day at work I sign s statement that I am feeling well and can work. This oricess is repea4ed when I get to work. So it is twice.once when I check in. Once when I get screened Yesterday I called off. I have been working a lot.lately. my fatigue kevel was high Todsy I get a mote saying ny absence was un...	Maresie888	5	767	Jul 31, 2020 by Maresie888
	Hope For Today - July 31 (Preview) The author remembered reading a magazine article stating that the correct use of the mind leads to wisdom and the incorrect use of the mind mind leads to insanity. When coming into Al-Anon, the author realized that the core of the program was based on the right use of the mind as well as the heart. The au...	Freetime	4	518	Jul 31, 2020 by DavidG
	Courage to Change 7/30 (Preview) Good morning MIP. Today's reading talks about decisions and choices we can make to be happy. We have all heard that happiness is an inside job, and that we can be as happy as we choose to me. While we all recognize it's unrealistic to be happy all the time, we can be happy most of the time if we make a commi...	Iamhere	5	573	Jul 30, 2020 by DavidG
	Courage to Change July 29 (Preview) In today's reading, the author reflects on the spiritual nature of the Al-Anon program. Al-Anon is not based on any particular religion, and no religious belief is required. There is not a specific dogma or philosophy. The important part is believing in a power greater than ourselves. We need this h...	Skorpi	3	632	Jul 29, 2020 by Iamhere
	Lies (Preview) I have been working briefly with a coworker who compulsively lies. His lies are not anything that can affect my.job I spent years with the qualifier who lied comoulsively. He lied about crashing the car repeatedly (which I paid for). He lied about working, where he was, virtually anything he was res...	Maresie888	8	700	Jul 29, 2020 by PosiesandPuppies
	ODAT in alanon, 7/27 (Preview) The reading for Monday, 7/27, asks the question: If alcoholism/addictions did not exist, would marriages and all other relationships be perfect? And of course the answer is no: sobriety does not end all problems. It is true that alcoholism does wreck marriages that might have otherwise been s...	Lyne	3	626	Jul 28, 2020 by Maresie888
	I hope this doesn't get old. (Preview) I really hope this doesn't get old. I am writing my life story as I speak. It has been over a year since I started in early July last year. It is very detailed & I hope it doesn't get too boring! I feel very exited about my memories! I really have a good story to tell--the whole truth! I feel like maybe I sh...	Hoot Nanny	4	573	Jul 28, 2020 by Hoot Nanny
	Courage to Change 7/25/2020 (Preview) Good morning MIP family! Today's reading talks about Courage. The author talks about after years and years of letting people take advantage of them, they had come to Al-Anon with quite a store of anger, resentment and guilt. So many times they wanted to "bite off their tongue" for saying "Yes," when w...	PosiesandPuppies	8	540	Jul 28, 2020 by Maresie888
	Greetings (Preview) 11 plus years sober. Was very sad to hear of Betty's passing. Working daily still as rehab is "essential" healthcare. It is crazy cuz I have plenty of exposure to barely recovering or relapsing people but now limited AA (and Alanon). BUT...on the flip side....still have a job and income and more likel...	pinkchip	10	797	Jul 28, 2020 by andromeda
	C2C 7/28/20 - Keep Coming Back: Benefits (Preview) AlAnon is a spiritual recovery program that yields miracles after persistent, consistent thought and effort. This can be compared to the work of a stone cutter who may strike a stone 99 times with no apparent effect before the rewarding break on the 100th. Acceptance of Alcoholism as a disease, acce...	Enigmatic	5	620	Jul 28, 2020 by Iamhere
	I'm a loud mouthed schnook! (Preview) Good Afternoon All. Earlier I waded in on a post without properly introducing myself. My intent was not to offend, but share how applying Alanon priciples have enriched my life. I entered AA recovery 25 years ago when my then hubby kicked me to the curb. Smart man. He cut his losses quickly. I was in...	Toronto	7	768	Jul 27, 2020 by Jen61
	How to detach from an alcoholic when doing so leaves them in physical danger (Preview) Ive been dragged into my alcoholic siblings problem for the last several months. It started as helping her get to detox (more than once) and once to rehab (she was sober for maybe 30 days after the rehab). Two months ago she had a bad fall and broke her arm, so needed help at home for awhile and has been un...	Christiob	5	684	Jul 27, 2020 by Jen61
	A daily, or weekly share...??? (Preview) Hi y'a'll... Having this group here, and the MIP groups generally has been a great boon for me. It has taken me beyond the possible... as it was... ...I needed 3 or 4 meetings a week at times- and had none. The bonus here is that we have some of the high motivation members- from different corn...	DavidG	1	558	Jul 27, 2020 by PosiesandPuppies
	Take What You Like And Leave The Rest (Preview) I know in "that other thread" I said I doubted I would ever be logging in again,yet here I am. I actually logged in because I was going to apologize for the things I said because I wasn't feeling good about myself for it. I felt like I was wrong in what I said and felt I didn't have the right to say what I thought...	SunnyFrogs	9	697	Jul 26, 2020 by mamalioness
	Hope for Today July 26 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about the twelve concepts and general warranties of the program. I will admit I dont know a lot about this except when they have been referred to in a meeting. The writer connects the warranties with being able adjust attitudes in relation to making decision...	yanksfan51	2	560	Jul 26, 2020 by Iamhere
	Last week’s hope for today! July 19 (Preview) I thought I posted this! So sorry everyone. It was sitting here waiting to go as I got ready to write today. What day is it again???? My apologies. Heres last weeks writing: Good morning Everyone: Today?s reading is about our growth toward self sufficiency. Many of us who grew up in alcoholism or h...	yanksfan51	1	569	Jul 26, 2020 by Freetime
	How to detach with love...not just completely stop caring... (Preview) Hi friends, I've gotten to a point where I don't know if what I'm doing/feeling is considered detaching "with love" or just plain I don't care anymore. I've been with my A for 5.5 years and we have a 1.5 year old daughter together. He relapses every few weeks - months. Never sober longer than 11 months...	foriver	8	832	Jul 26, 2020 by 2HP
	Good news comes last... sometimes... (Preview) Was in the city last week. At a hearing over child care and protection. I had to flick back- and see if I was repeating myself- and I was just about to. Getting into the present moment has been really hard for me. I was so much caught up between the "if only's" and the what if's. And i had a really big d...	DavidG	0	477	Jul 25, 2020 by DavidG
	ODAAT - July 24 - Welcoming Newcomers (Preview) I am posting very early for Friday -- I have a busy couple of days coming up. Today's page in One Day At A Time in Al-Anon reminds us how it feels to be a newcomer, and how we can best support newcomers. The newcomer usually feels alone in a hostile world, drowning in a sea of troubles. We need to guard agai...	Freetime	8	583	Jul 25, 2020 by mamalioness
	birthday blessings & wishes. (Preview) It has been 54 years since I came to this planet & I never had it so good! All the blessings & positive thoughts for me are far from evident. I really feel that I deserve them & the friends I have met over the years who have been w/ me almost a life time. I have been so blessed w/ all of you that take m...	Hoot Nanny	2	513	Jul 25, 2020 by PosiesandPuppies
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.