Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

DavidG · DavidG

We have two gorges out of this valley, and two passes. We are slap-bang in the middle of this big island. I have to go up one gorge to my meeting- which seems to be going well. ... First weeks- I was playing heavy prison blues in my truck. But just lately i notice a change. Many people won't have heard of...

Maresie888 · Maresie888

Originally AA was 6 steps. Bill W decided to expand it to 12 steps In the beginning it was a knowledged that what kept the alcoholic sober was going to meetings Certainly for me dealing with numerous qualifiers but one truly sociopathic one before I came into these rooms I had to trust that al anon mig...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP and happy Saturday to all. Today's reading is all about the gift of a spiritual relationship with a higher power that we gain in our recovery journey. We come to realize that we are powerless to change the fact that alcoholism has affected our lives. We come to believe that a Power gr...

Fedora · Fedora

My divorce was finalized about a week ago. Although we are still in the same house (and will be until the end of the year), I feel like this is bringing me to a whole new level of recovery and I am Very happy about it. Now that we are no longer connected by law, I don't have to use any imagination to work my pro...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's reading in Courage to Change talks about the quietness of heart that comes from taking the Seventh Step, "Humbly asked him to remove our shortcomings." Humbly means calmly. It is not groveling, and it is not trying to impress. Humility is not humiliating. It is doing my part, and trusting a...

Lyne · Lyne

In the reading for Monday 5/17, the author says we really have no choice but to live one day at a time. We can make plans and scheme, but we cannot control results. We can compress ODAT to one hour or one minute, which can make life not only bearable but precious. By focusing on what is going on right here...

Lyne · Lyne

This reading is for Monday, 5/24. Oscar Wilde is quoted: In this world there are only two tragedies. One is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it. The last is much the worst. The writer says their will gets them into trouble, for even if they get it, they are not satisfied. The 12 Ste...

mamamary1964 · mamamary1964

Why do I feel guilty when I know I am being manipulated and say no? My situation is making me sick to my stomach. I cannot seem to get it through my daughter's head that the gravy train is derailed! When I say no, she keeps telling me I never help her and curses at me and threatens to start doing illegal thi...

Skorpi · Skorpi

In today's reading, the author reflects on a former belief that if they could just find the right words, do the right things, dress in the right way, etc. people would agree with them and they would be accepted and belong. The author tended to look at others and believe that their outward appearances (h...

Debb · Debb

The author of todays reading brings to light the guiding "illumination" of reading and working the 12 Steps of Al-Anonand the benefits that not only helps the AA member but that the Al-Anon Step program guides the Al-Anon membersto attain the "aspirations" of a new beginning of a better way to live as...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's writer acknowledged handling some of life's inevitable challenges by not addressing them, remaining silent to avoid an argument. Consistently, this lead to resentment and poor outcomes.Seeing this pattern led to the realization that, though not something likely experienced by choic...

mamalioness · mamalioness

Monday, our state opted out of the federal unemployment, Rescue act that impacted me like a tsunami..I get 3-1/2 deposits left and that is IT!!! and that has to go to ins. (house and car) car reg. it has to go to STUFF so Monday, I am crying my eyes out, literally sobbing and hyperventilating almost becau...

Stepaddy · Stepaddy

A bottle of wine at least every day by 10 pm anything can get her arguing defensive, why is this happening to me stuff stuff falls, things break, bangs knee or breaks nail i work very hard for you and you criticize me. Not ! Taking anything I say as being critical she starts at 5 so how do I limit or slow or...

Maresie888 · Maresie888

At one time I went to.12 step meetings several times per day. One speaker stated that 70% of persons who go to 12 step meetings never do a 4th step For me the 4th step was indeed daunting. I did not want to.disclose how angry resentful and grief stricken I was. For the past few months I have been in a grief c...

Maresie888 · Maresie888

One of my core issues with the qualifier was his impulsivity. He reacted constantly. He was barely able to contain his emotions There is a long list of things he did that brought chaos to my life: 1) Quit jobs 2) Lost jobs 3) spent money (lots of it) 4) Had car accidents (I lost count) 5) Stormed out an...

Maria123 · Maria123

"Of all the things I've lost in life (my keys, my coat, my purse, you name it), it's my mind I miss the most" :biggin: I may have posted this before but it saddens me to see wonderful people here doubting themselves, mistrusting their judgement over and over again so I guess it bears repeating...

texas yankee · texas yankee

I've been here before, several times, with some words of encouragement or ESH to others who happen to be on a particularly bumpy part of their path, but mostly I've been here desperately looking for some ESH for myself when the disease throws me a curveball - this in one of those times when I'm looking fo...

DavidG · DavidG

... south of us is a vast farming district.The locals roll their r-r-r-'s when they speak. Humble honest folk. And the groups in the southern city are burgeoning. I am not going to rehearse the topic at the assembly. Stuff there, of course, is "in committee". It is more than possible that someone f...

DavidG · DavidG

...one of the privileges of old age. I often struggled with sleep and resting- lots. When I was a kid I sometimes wanted and needed to weep. Very much so. But I put so much energy and discipline into holding tears back. One phrase that sits in the beck of my mind is this one:- "I'll give you something to cry...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about our work in trusting our HPs will. The writer describes having grown up in an alcoholic home and as a result, developed a stubbornness in trusting others, really feeling a me against them mentality. The writer struggled with surrendering to HPs will,...

Iamhere · Iamhere

MIP Family - my apologies - I completely forgot to post a daily today. I offer no excuses or explanation - just amends for forgetting. I hope everyone had a great day - I did...busy, busy, busy yet fun/joyful.

Maresie888 · Maresie888

One of my core automatic self destructive patterns was envy My reaction to much of life was to envy others. In particular I most certainly envied the Qualifier. Since they were in a place of numbing themselves I certainly envied their lack of pain. Of course since they took substances they were mere...

JerryF · JerryF

See the wide smile on my face? I finally got a bit of protocol for logging in to this program and it worked.....Had to get rid of the old me (??? really? does that work!!!) and then keep the protocol simple. KEEP IT SIMPLE!!! WHO CAME UP WITH THAT ONE!!!?? I kinda sorta remember something like that...

mamalioness · mamalioness

though this is for NA, I can sure relate to what the author is saying about insanity is repeating the same mistakes and expecting different results He or she goes on to talk about mistakes and how we all know how it feels to make them. And how many of us feel that our whole lives have been a mistake. We often t...

mamalioness · mamalioness

Each day a new beginning May 14 In this daily, the author talks about miracles are instantaneous, we cant summon them but they just come of them selves and usually at unlikely moments and when we least expect them they talk about how we were miraculously been summoned to the road to recovery. And for su...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I literally have nothing to complain about. Even the day is bright & sunshiny & cooperative. The birds are chirping. Flowers are blooming. There is no room for complaints. I am just excited about a new day. It seems like that is a common thread to my day. I just have to wake up & hit the floor....

Bettertomorrow · Bettertomorrow

Dear friends, I am struggling and looking for ESH please as I feel like I am walking through a minefield that is still miles long. So I have been separated from my AH the last 9 months. I have always maintained the stance that while he is not actively drunk that he is welcome to see the children and he manag...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's reading in Courage to Change says that consistency, diligence, and patience in practicing the program lead to results -- although not always in the timing we want and not without periods where it seems like nothing is improving. A sentence from this page that has been true for me is, "Just wh...

Debb · Debb

Todays reading asks and answers the question why have we all come to Al-Anon for help. It suggests that as spouses/friends/childrenof an alcoholic we want reassurance that in our "torn down" state of mind we need reassurance that we are not the cause of the drinking. Our self-esteem has been dama...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's author identifies the greatest hindrance to serenity: ourselves when we try to address every action, perceived wrong or injustice done to or around us. A main them in Alanon is the suggestion that, since we don't know what 'should' occur for anyone, we let go, let god/higher power, let event...

DavidG · DavidG

...I don't say this out loud at all- but i say it to myself often. At the same time- As I wake up there is always a song on my heart- music is healing. But what I say to myself is this:- "If i dropped tomorrow I will die happy." After tests last week it does look like I may have 15 or 20 years. ... There was on...

WendyP · WendyP

I would like to share this story with all of you, as It has helped me so much in early recovery and still does, when I remember to do it. It comes from a very old Book of Al-Anon Forum Favorites. Here Goes. A Farmhand carelessly left a freshly-milked pail of milk in the cowshed and went off to supper. Two Fro...

jellybeans · jellybeans

hi there, hoping someone can answer a question... i've heard that alcoholics are often narcissistic but i'm wondering if it's fair to say that the spouses of alcoholics are often narcissistic? if so, would appreciate any type of literature that points to this. thank you

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Yesterday I spent my 1st mother's day w/o my mom. She died on September 30th of last year. I miss her terribly. I guess the day went well. I was able to do some things to make myself feel better. My husband & I bought balloons & red roses for her. We went to the grave site & took a lot of pictures fo...

DavidG · DavidG

This is "a letter home" sort of posting. When I was in America sought out people associated with these MIP groups and spent time with three. In Maori we say kanohi ki te kanohi, or face to face. There is no substitute for face to face contact. I have a meeting tonight, godwilling. Two members or maybe t...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's C2C, an AL-Anon member who is agnostic shares about doubt and their struggles with belief. Sometimes, this member doubts the existence of anything that cares about what happens in the world, let alone the author's life. Then, the author remembers how they were guided to Al-A...

DavidG · DavidG

At the moment I am uploading my mum a fair bit. Getting memory recall, almost daily... ...I sometimes have mixed feelings about here, as I am sure well all do- with people we love. I followed her through family, an alcoholic marriage and into a different world- where she was settled and happy. I thi...

SunnyFrogs · SunnyFrogs

While going through years of trauma therapy I had a new found strength in myself. I was determined to stop being a doormat,start standing up for myself and stop allowing others to walk all over me. I started telling off and getting rid of every person that even looked at me the wrong way. I became extrem...

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday, May 10th, asks the question, how can I detach from my own wife or husband when our lives are bound together? The author says there are kinds of involvement that make our difficulties worse: when we interfere with the alcoholics activities, finding out where they are, what th...

Maresie888 · Maresie888

When I came into.al.anon I was living with the chaos created by an active alcoholic addict. My own reaction to this state of the affairs made it harder Fast forward many years down the line The pandemic has been almost two years. Vaccination has not changed much really. Tremendous issues and limit...

Iamhere · Iamhere

First, for any who are mothers, Happy Mother's Day to one and all. I will readily admit that Mother's Day and many other 'formal Hallmark holidays' for me are overrated. I tend to have to work overtime to keep my anxiety at bay simply because what may appear to be normal for many other families and on th...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about the power of forgiveness and the consistent work we do in recovery to be aware of our attitudes. The writer describes the feeling when old wounds resurface- that this is the signal to do a self inventory and work the steps. Step 10 is awareness work and hel...

DavidG · DavidG

Changes are strong- that Yanksfan will present us with a reading from H4Today tomorrow on Sunday. But something in today's reading struck me- and i wanted to share. I I write/speak I am also strongly aware of the reading from Courage 2 change- about the yes-buts. The what-if's, the if-only's an...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning and Happy Saturday MIP. Today's reading/daily talks about how WE can get in our own way....in our recovery and our lives. Two words that signal a lack of acceptance are, "Yes, but . . . " Time takes time, yet when we can accept everything as it is, we can be reasonably serene. We do not hav...

Debb · Debb

I did not know that, in Al-Anon, you are not suppose to talk about your spouses actions and misbehaviors! I have been doing this all wrong? Have I broken the suggested guidance of Al-Anon all this time? If so, I am sorry to you all!!

Freetime · Freetime

Today's share in Courage to Change is by someone who found it hard to accept that alcoholism is a disease. They realized that they would not claim that will power alone could defeat diabetes or cancer, and would not blame the patient for their symptoms. In the same way, it did no good to nag, scold, comp...

Debb · Debb

In todays reading the author suggests that we do not come to Al-Anon to learn how to control the alcoholic. The reading continues to say that we come to Al-Anon to improve ourselves and thereby it maybe a contributingfactor in getting the alcoholic into recovery.It is also suggested that we do not di...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading in C2C, the author reflects on humility. As a child, the author learned that humility meant putting the needs of others before their own. Humility was associated with degradation, and was not a positive feeling. Through work in the Al-Anon program, the author realize...

Christie08 · Christie08

Hello Everyone. This is my first time posting. I lost my mom to Cirrhosis almost 10 months ago. My children and I were her main care givers the last few months of her life. It was one of the most difficult things Ive ever had to do. It was my choice to bring her home from the hospital on hospice care when t...

Hello · Hello

So my so called sober husband went to a party the other night and stayed over sleeping in our car as he was having a few. For a number of years now he had been saying he wasnt drinking at all. I always had my suspicions which has been proven true now. Its like i dont know what to do with this. Ive been an alanon...

DavidG · DavidG

I used to have a terrible personality. I used to call it my "poisonality". I would sometimes say the most inappropriate things. Basically I had never learned to communicate well. Things have improved considerably in this department. I am it the city- getting our caravan customised. With solar p...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's author contrasts two ways of seeing disappointment and misfortune:1) As we may be first tempted to, with resentment and a sense we are suffering or being unfairly punished, or2) with a spiritual view that, as all things are as they should be in the moment according to our higher power's will,...

mamamary1964 · mamamary1964

My daughter is set to be getting out of Rehab in about a week and a half. She is talking about a sober living home, but doesn't have a job so I would have to assist her. I cannot find any information about costs no matter who I contact. Does anybody have any experience with this? She is telling me it's lik...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Happy Saturday MIP. Happy May too! Today's reading discusses how 'if only' thinking made our lives unmanageable, but a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. Many of us who arrive at Al-Anon have put our happiness on hold for things beyond our control. Our first step - admitti...

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday, 5/3, talks about how at first detachment seemed cold and not loving at all. But the author now sees it as a wonderful gift. They are allowing their loved ones the privilege and opportunity of being themselves. They no longer want to interfere, intervene, protect, nor do the...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is a description of how living in an alcoholic environment can make it impossible for us us to view the world with clarity. The writer describes repeating the behaviors of his/her parents and grandparents in terms of looking at life, and didnt approach it any di...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's share in Courage to Change is by someone who had a dripping faucet, and kept trying to fix it themselves, but it continued dripping until it did extensive damage, and they had to call for outside help. It was the same way with other problems, waiting until a situation would explode before addr...

DavidG · DavidG

These are vital writings. Today that would not be read at the average meeting. This is not CAL. Bu the AA BB can be found in a lot of our homes- and it is well worth reading at home. Chapters 8 and 9 in the AA Big Book showed the way- and showed the impact of addictive drinking on the family. "To Wi...

DavidG · DavidG

I missed my F2F meeting last night. Am in the big city for this week. and working north of the city on my BBQ Ranch. I couldn't bear to kill and eat our spare ewe so I am giving her away to a good home. Our local meeting is still an hour away for me. The number of regular members is gradually growing- f...

Debb · Debb

Todays reading talks to us about when we are asked to forgive someone who has hurt us. The author suggests that unless we have notalready condemned or judged the person asking for forgiveness, that there would be no reason for us to forgive them. Instead we wouldhave to forgive ourselves for judgin...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Recovery song- long before AA and Alanon... (Preview) We have two gorges out of this valley, and two passes. We are slap-bang in the middle of this big island. I have to go up one gorge to my meeting- which seems to be going well. ... First weeks- I was playing heavy prison blues in my truck. But just lately i notice a change. Many people won't have heard of...	DavidG	5	2200	May 25, 2021 by Maresie888
	6 step (Preview) Originally AA was 6 steps. Bill W decided to expand it to 12 steps In the beginning it was a knowledged that what kept the alcoholic sober was going to meetings Certainly for me dealing with numerous qualifiers but one truly sociopathic one before I came into these rooms I had to trust that al anon mig...	Maresie888	3	757	May 25, 2021 by SunnyFrogs
	Courage to Change 5/22 (Preview) Good morning MIP and happy Saturday to all. Today's reading is all about the gift of a spiritual relationship with a higher power that we gain in our recovery journey. We come to realize that we are powerless to change the fact that alcoholism has affected our lives. We come to believe that a Power gr...	Iamhere	10	4023	May 24, 2021 by Maresie888
	Divorced finalized and so many things have already gotten easier. (Preview) My divorce was finalized about a week ago. Although we are still in the same house (and will be until the end of the year), I feel like this is bringing me to a whole new level of recovery and I am Very happy about it. Now that we are no longer connected by law, I don't have to use any imagination to work my pro...	Fedora	5	2025	May 24, 2021 by SunnyFrogs
	May 21 - Courage to Change - Humility (Preview) Today's reading in Courage to Change talks about the quietness of heart that comes from taking the Seventh Step, "Humbly asked him to remove our shortcomings." Humbly means calmly. It is not groveling, and it is not trying to impress. Humility is not humiliating. It is doing my part, and trusting a...	Freetime	13	3674	May 24, 2021 by Maresie888
	C2C, 5/17, right here, right now (Preview) In the reading for Monday 5/17, the author says we really have no choice but to live one day at a time. We can make plans and scheme, but we cannot control results. We can compress ODAT to one hour or one minute, which can make life not only bearable but precious. By focusing on what is going on right here...	Lyne	11	4987	May 24, 2021 by Maresie888
	C2C, 5/24, can we let go of self-will (Preview) This reading is for Monday, 5/24. Oscar Wilde is quoted: In this world there are only two tragedies. One is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it. The last is much the worst. The writer says their will gets them into trouble, for even if they get it, they are not satisfied. The 12 Ste...	Lyne	6	707	May 24, 2021 by Maresie888
	Manipulation and Guilt (Preview) Why do I feel guilty when I know I am being manipulated and say no? My situation is making me sick to my stomach. I cannot seem to get it through my daughter's head that the gravy train is derailed! When I say no, she keeps telling me I never help her and curses at me and threatens to start doing illegal thi...	mamamary1964	16	3800	May 23, 2021 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change May 19 (Preview) In today's reading, the author reflects on a former belief that if they could just find the right words, do the right things, dress in the right way, etc. people would agree with them and they would be accepted and belong. The author tended to look at others and believe that their outward appearances (h...	Skorpi	7	3617	May 21, 2021 by Maresie888
	May 20, 2021 – ODAT – Al-Anon 12 Steps (Preview) The author of todays reading brings to light the guiding "illumination" of reading and working the 12 Steps of Al-Anonand the benefits that not only helps the AA member but that the Al-Anon Step program guides the Al-Anon membersto attain the "aspirations" of a new beginning of a better way to live as...	Debb	6	2767	May 21, 2021 by Maresie888
	5/18/21 Courage to Change – Adversity, Opportunity (Preview) Today's writer acknowledged handling some of life's inevitable challenges by not addressing them, remaining silent to avoid an argument. Consistently, this lead to resentment and poor outcomes.Seeing this pattern led to the realization that, though not something likely experienced by choic...	Enigmatic	10	5291	May 20, 2021 by mamalioness
	Olive branches (Preview) Monday, our state opted out of the federal unemployment, Rescue act that impacted me like a tsunami..I get 3-1/2 deposits left and that is IT!!! and that has to go to ins. (house and car) car reg. it has to go to STUFF so Monday, I am crying my eyes out, literally sobbing and hyperventilating almost becau...	mamalioness	8	3150	May 20, 2021 by mamalioness
	Alcoholic senior wife (Preview) A bottle of wine at least every day by 10 pm anything can get her arguing defensive, why is this happening to me stuff stuff falls, things break, bangs knee or breaks nail i work very hard for you and you criticize me. Not ! Taking anything I say as being critical she starts at 5 so how do I limit or slow or...	Stepaddy	5	3665	May 19, 2021 by JerryF
	5th step (Preview) At one time I went to.12 step meetings several times per day. One speaker stated that 70% of persons who go to 12 step meetings never do a 4th step For me the 4th step was indeed daunting. I did not want to.disclose how angry resentful and grief stricken I was. For the past few months I have been in a grief c...	Maresie888	7	750	May 19, 2021 by Daffodils
	Impulsivity (Preview) One of my core issues with the qualifier was his impulsivity. He reacted constantly. He was barely able to contain his emotions There is a long list of things he did that brought chaos to my life: 1) Quit jobs 2) Lost jobs 3) spent money (lots of it) 4) Had car accidents (I lost count) 5) Stormed out an...	Maresie888	3	3724	May 18, 2021 by Debb
	Abuse - Verbal, Emotional - you'd be amazed (Preview) "Of all the things I've lost in life (my keys, my coat, my purse, you name it), it's my mind I miss the most" :biggin: I may have posted this before but it saddens me to see wonderful people here doubting themselves, mistrusting their judgement over and over again so I guess it bears repeating...	Maria123	16	13924	May 17, 2021 by Maresie888
	Looking for a balance between gratitude, hope, and the reality of this disease ( 1 2 ) (Preview) I've been here before, several times, with some words of encouragement or ESH to others who happen to be on a particularly bumpy part of their path, but mostly I've been here desperately looking for some ESH for myself when the disease throws me a curveball - this in one of those times when I'm looking fo...	texas yankee	55	4863	May 17, 2021 by Iamhere
	Our assembly... (Preview) ... south of us is a vast farming district.The locals roll their r-r-r-'s when they speak. Humble honest folk. And the groups in the southern city are burgeoning. I am not going to rehearse the topic at the assembly. Stuff there, of course, is "in committee". It is more than possible that someone f...	DavidG	2	1158	May 17, 2021 by Lyne
	The power of a nana nap... (Preview) ...one of the privileges of old age. I often struggled with sleep and resting- lots. When I was a kid I sometimes wanted and needed to weep. Very much so. But I put so much energy and discipline into holding tears back. One phrase that sits in the beck of my mind is this one:- "I'll give you something to cry...	DavidG	3	1313	May 17, 2021 by JerryF
	Hope for Today May 16 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about our work in trusting our HPs will. The writer describes having grown up in an alcoholic home and as a result, developed a stubbornness in trusting others, really feeling a me against them mentality. The writer struggled with surrendering to HPs will,...	yanksfan51	5	1742	May 16, 2021 by DavidG
	My Bad - No Daily Today (Preview) MIP Family - my apologies - I completely forgot to post a daily today. I offer no excuses or explanation - just amends for forgetting. I hope everyone had a great day - I did...busy, busy, busy yet fun/joyful.	Iamhere	6	1567	May 16, 2021 by Maresie888
	Envy (Preview) One of my core automatic self destructive patterns was envy My reaction to much of life was to envy others. In particular I most certainly envied the Qualifier. Since they were in a place of numbing themselves I certainly envied their lack of pain. Of course since they took substances they were mere...	Maresie888	6	651	May 15, 2021 by SunnyFrogs
	Good Morning Family (Preview) See the wide smile on my face? I finally got a bit of protocol for logging in to this program and it worked.....Had to get rid of the old me (??? really? does that work!!!) and then keep the protocol simple. KEEP IT SIMPLE!!! WHO CAME UP WITH THAT ONE!!!?? I kinda sorta remember something like that...	JerryF	7	647	May 15, 2021 by PosiesandPuppies
	Taken from NA just for today but it’s a great post (Preview) though this is for NA, I can sure relate to what the author is saying about insanity is repeating the same mistakes and expecting different results He or she goes on to talk about mistakes and how we all know how it feels to make them. And how many of us feel that our whole lives have been a mistake. We often t...	mamalioness	4	2797	May 15, 2021 by PosiesandPuppies
	Each day a new beginning May 14 (Preview) Each day a new beginning May 14 In this daily, the author talks about miracles are instantaneous, we cant summon them but they just come of them selves and usually at unlikely moments and when we least expect them they talk about how we were miraculously been summoned to the road to recovery. And for su...	mamalioness	1	1399	May 15, 2021 by Debb
	NOTHING TO COMPLAIN ABOUT (Preview) I literally have nothing to complain about. Even the day is bright & sunshiny & cooperative. The birds are chirping. Flowers are blooming. There is no room for complaints. I am just excited about a new day. It seems like that is a common thread to my day. I just have to wake up & hit the floor....	Hoot Nanny	2	1436	May 15, 2021 by Maresie888
	Struggling.......ESH please (Preview) Dear friends, I am struggling and looking for ESH please as I feel like I am walking through a minefield that is still miles long. So I have been separated from my AH the last 9 months. I have always maintained the stance that while he is not actively drunk that he is welcome to see the children and he manag...	Bettertomorrow	8	3650	May 14, 2021 by Maresie888
	May 14 - Courage to Change - Patience and Progress (Preview) Today's reading in Courage to Change says that consistency, diligence, and patience in practicing the program lead to results -- although not always in the timing we want and not without periods where it seems like nothing is improving. A sentence from this page that has been true for me is, "Just wh...	Freetime	8	1431	May 14, 2021 by Iamhere
	May 13, 2021 – ODAT – Seeking Self-esteem (Preview) Todays reading asks and answers the question why have we all come to Al-Anon for help. It suggests that as spouses/friends/childrenof an alcoholic we want reassurance that in our "torn down" state of mind we need reassurance that we are not the cause of the drinking. Our self-esteem has been dama...	Debb	9	2582	May 14, 2021 by SunnyFrogs
	5/11/21 ODAT - Let it Go? (Preview) Today's author identifies the greatest hindrance to serenity: ourselves when we try to address every action, perceived wrong or injustice done to or around us. A main them in Alanon is the suggestion that, since we don't know what 'should' occur for anyone, we let go, let god/higher power, let event...	Enigmatic	7	2610	May 14, 2021 by mamalioness
	Step 12- gratitude... (Preview) ...I don't say this out loud at all- but i say it to myself often. At the same time- As I wake up there is always a song on my heart- music is healing. But what I say to myself is this:- "If i dropped tomorrow I will die happy." After tests last week it does look like I may have 15 or 20 years. ... There was on...	DavidG	2	501	May 13, 2021 by Debb
	The Tale Of The Two Frogs, (Preview) I would like to share this story with all of you, as It has helped me so much in early recovery and still does, when I remember to do it. It comes from a very old Book of Al-Anon Forum Favorites. Here Goes. A Farmhand carelessly left a freshly-milked pail of milk in the cowshed and went off to supper. Two Fro...	WendyP	3	815	May 13, 2021 by Iamhere
	question on narcissism (Preview) hi there, hoping someone can answer a question... i've heard that alcoholics are often narcissistic but i'm wondering if it's fair to say that the spouses of alcoholics are often narcissistic? if so, would appreciate any type of literature that points to this. thank you	jellybeans	13	3799	May 13, 2021 by Maresie888
	1st Moher's day w/o mom (Preview) Yesterday I spent my 1st mother's day w/o my mom. She died on September 30th of last year. I miss her terribly. I guess the day went well. I was able to do some things to make myself feel better. My husband & I bought balloons & red roses for her. We went to the grave site & took a lot of pictures fo...	Hoot Nanny	10	2544	May 13, 2021 by Maresie888
	Dreams are free... :) (Preview) This is "a letter home" sort of posting. When I was in America sought out people associated with these MIP groups and spent time with three. In Maori we say kanohi ki te kanohi, or face to face. There is no substitute for face to face contact. I have a meeting tonight, godwilling. Two members or maybe t...	DavidG	2	556	May 13, 2021 by DavidG
	Courage to Change May 12 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's C2C, an AL-Anon member who is agnostic shares about doubt and their struggles with belief. Sometimes, this member doubts the existence of anything that cares about what happens in the world, let alone the author's life. Then, the author remembers how they were guided to Al-A...	Skorpi	4	545	May 12, 2021 by PosiesandPuppies
	Something on the tip of my tongue... (Preview) At the moment I am uploading my mum a fair bit. Getting memory recall, almost daily... ...I sometimes have mixed feelings about here, as I am sure well all do- with people we love. I followed her through family, an alcoholic marriage and into a different world- where she was settled and happy. I thi...	DavidG	6	730	May 11, 2021 by SunnyFrogs
	A Gentle Program (Preview) While going through years of trauma therapy I had a new found strength in myself. I was determined to stop being a doormat,start standing up for myself and stop allowing others to walk all over me. I started telling off and getting rid of every person that even looked at me the wrong way. I became extrem...	SunnyFrogs	5	616	May 11, 2021 by SunnyFrogs
	ODAT in alanon, 5/10, suspicion and prying (Preview) The reading for Monday, May 10th, asks the question, how can I detach from my own wife or husband when our lives are bound together? The author says there are kinds of involvement that make our difficulties worse: when we interfere with the alcoholics activities, finding out where they are, what th...	Lyne	6	2844	May 11, 2021 by Maresie888
	When the dial is hovering on red (Preview) When I came into.al.anon I was living with the chaos created by an active alcoholic addict. My own reaction to this state of the affairs made it harder Fast forward many years down the line The pandemic has been almost two years. Vaccination has not changed much really. Tremendous issues and limit...	Maresie888	4	2259	May 10, 2021 by Maresie888
	Happy Mother's Day (Preview) First, for any who are mothers, Happy Mother's Day to one and all. I will readily admit that Mother's Day and many other 'formal Hallmark holidays' for me are overrated. I tend to have to work overtime to keep my anxiety at bay simply because what may appear to be normal for many other families and on th...	Iamhere	10	3454	May 10, 2021 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today May 9 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about the power of forgiveness and the consistent work we do in recovery to be aware of our attitudes. The writer describes the feeling when old wounds resurface- that this is the signal to do a self inventory and work the steps. Step 10 is awareness work and hel...	yanksfan51	11	1981	May 9, 2021 by yanksfan51
	Reflections on May 8 reading from Hope For Today... (Preview) Changes are strong- that Yanksfan will present us with a reading from H4Today tomorrow on Sunday. But something in today's reading struck me- and i wanted to share. I I write/speak I am also strongly aware of the reading from Courage 2 change- about the yes-buts. The what-if's, the if-only's an...	DavidG	3	2482	May 9, 2021 by DavidG
	Courage to Change 5/8 (Preview) Good morning and Happy Saturday MIP. Today's reading/daily talks about how WE can get in our own way....in our recovery and our lives. Two words that signal a lack of acceptance are, "Yes, but . . . " Time takes time, yet when we can accept everything as it is, we can be reasonably serene. We do not hav...	Iamhere	6	797	May 9, 2021 by mamalioness
	Question For You! (Preview) I did not know that, in Al-Anon, you are not suppose to talk about your spouses actions and misbehaviors! I have been doing this all wrong? Have I broken the suggested guidance of Al-Anon all this time? If so, I am sorry to you all!!	Debb	32	2614	May 8, 2021 by Enigmatic
	May 7 - Courage to Change - The Disease Concept (Preview) Today's share in Courage to Change is by someone who found it hard to accept that alcoholism is a disease. They realized that they would not claim that will power alone could defeat diabetes or cancer, and would not blame the patient for their symptoms. In the same way, it did no good to nag, scold, comp...	Freetime	7	2120	May 7, 2021 by a4l
	May 6, 2021 – ODAT – Realization of the Disease of Alcoholism (Preview) In todays reading the author suggests that we do not come to Al-Anon to learn how to control the alcoholic. The reading continues to say that we come to Al-Anon to improve ourselves and thereby it maybe a contributingfactor in getting the alcoholic into recovery.It is also suggested that we do not di...	Debb	9	3631	May 6, 2021 by WendyP
	Courage to Change May 5 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading in C2C, the author reflects on humility. As a child, the author learned that humility meant putting the needs of others before their own. Humility was associated with degradation, and was not a positive feeling. Through work in the Al-Anon program, the author realize...	Skorpi	6	584	May 6, 2021 by Iamhere
	How to move on after Losing a loved one to Alcoholic Cirrhosis (Preview) Hello Everyone. This is my first time posting. I lost my mom to Cirrhosis almost 10 months ago. My children and I were her main care givers the last few months of her life. It was one of the most difficult things Ive ever had to do. It was my choice to bring her home from the hospital on hospice care when t...	Christie08	9	4198	May 5, 2021 by DavidG
	Square 1 (Preview) So my so called sober husband went to a party the other night and stayed over sleeping in our car as he was having a few. For a number of years now he had been saying he wasnt drinking at all. I always had my suspicions which has been proven true now. Its like i dont know what to do with this. Ive been an alanon...	Hello	8	864	May 5, 2021 by Jen61
	Down the rocky road to self-sabotage... (Preview) I used to have a terrible personality. I used to call it my "poisonality". I would sometimes say the most inappropriate things. Basically I had never learned to communicate well. Things have improved considerably in this department. I am it the city- getting our caravan customised. With solar p...	DavidG	4	1951	May 4, 2021 by a4l
	5/4/21 ODAT – Disappointment, Misfortune…as Gifts of Enlightenment (Preview) Today's author contrasts two ways of seeing disappointment and misfortune:1) As we may be first tempted to, with resentment and a sense we are suffering or being unfairly punished, or2) with a spiritual view that, as all things are as they should be in the moment according to our higher power's will,...	Enigmatic	5	604	May 4, 2021 by a4l
	Question - Addict Returning from Rehab (Preview) My daughter is set to be getting out of Rehab in about a week and a half. She is talking about a sober living home, but doesn't have a job so I would have to assist her. I cannot find any information about costs no matter who I contact. Does anybody have any experience with this? She is telling me it's lik...	mamamary1964	38	1137	May 4, 2021 by Iamhere
	C2C 5/1 (Preview) Happy Saturday MIP. Happy May too! Today's reading discusses how 'if only' thinking made our lives unmanageable, but a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. Many of us who arrive at Al-Anon have put our happiness on hold for things beyond our control. Our first step - admitti...	Iamhere	10	2130	May 4, 2021 by Maresie888
	C2C, 5/3, detachment (Preview) The reading for Monday, 5/3, talks about how at first detachment seemed cold and not loving at all. But the author now sees it as a wonderful gift. They are allowing their loved ones the privilege and opportunity of being themselves. They no longer want to interfere, intervene, protect, nor do the...	Lyne	5	687	May 3, 2021 by Debb
	Hope for Today May 2 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is a description of how living in an alcoholic environment can make it impossible for us us to view the world with clarity. The writer describes repeating the behaviors of his/her parents and grandparents in terms of looking at life, and didnt approach it any di...	yanksfan51	7	2960	May 3, 2021 by Maresie888
	April 30 - Courage to Change - Sharing our Dilemmas (Preview) Today's share in Courage to Change is by someone who had a dripping faucet, and kept trying to fix it themselves, but it continued dripping until it did extensive damage, and they had to call for outside help. It was the same way with other problems, waiting until a situation would explode before addr...	Freetime	10	2353	May 1, 2021 by Freetime
	Our first literature... (Preview) These are vital writings. Today that would not be read at the average meeting. This is not CAL. Bu the AA BB can be found in a lot of our homes- and it is well worth reading at home. Chapters 8 and 9 in the AA Big Book showed the way- and showed the impact of addictive drinking on the family. "To Wi...	DavidG	7	1052	Apr 30, 2021 by a4l
	A weekly share... (Preview) I missed my F2F meeting last night. Am in the big city for this week. and working north of the city on my BBQ Ranch. I couldn't bear to kill and eat our spare ewe so I am giving her away to a good home. Our local meeting is still an hour away for me. The number of regular members is gradually growing- f...	DavidG	2	2190	Apr 29, 2021 by Maresie888
	April 29, 2021 – ODAT – Forgive (Preview) Todays reading talks to us about when we are asked to forgive someone who has hurt us. The author suggests that unless we have notalready condemned or judged the person asking for forgiveness, that there would be no reason for us to forgive them. Instead we wouldhave to forgive ourselves for judgin...	Debb	10	2758	Apr 29, 2021 by Iamhere
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.