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Action or Not
(Preview)
"When I begin to worry about things I can do nothing about, I tell myself to accept what you can't change. Often I've used the ideas in the Serenity Prayer as a trigger for relinquishing my need to control and as a reminder to take action when some discontentment can be remedied."
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Mike B
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2
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389
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Some difficult times...........
(Preview)
I am finding a lot of things in my life very difficult. I have come a long way but we always need to listen and learn for us to continue to get better.My brother in law came and stayed with us for a couple of days. I am not one who likes having overnight company but I put on my positive face and thought to mysel...
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Jen61
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18
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975
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But.
(Preview)
I can't say it's the easiest week I've ever had. But.... Daughter had her rather public meltdown. But through it we are closer, and I have a much clearer picture of what she needs from me right now. She's been happy, I have had a chance to spoil her and mother her relentlessly, in a good way and we have some g...
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missmeliss
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10
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644
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Selfish
(Preview)
I am very new to this (15 minutes to be exact) but one of the hardest things that I am experiencing with my alcoholic is the extreme selfishness. "I want to do this right now. I don't want to do this right now. I am mad so I will ignore you now. I am frustrated so I am going to leave the house and talk to...
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amys
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6
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515
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boyfriend advice please
(Preview)
Hello, I am new to this and am feeling desperate and heart broken. I am in love with an AH who has been in recovery for about 8 months. His problem was so serious that he actually died from it twice and was revived. When we met he had been sober for only 3 months. I guess I was pretty clueless because I act...
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Runnergirl
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5
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490
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Codependency at it's finest
(Preview)
Sunday my alcoholic left against medical advice and came home. Everything was fine for that day, we took a walk in the park and then we just sat outside and enjoyed the weather. Sometimes we like to stroll through our neighborhood and pick apart the houses until we come up with an idea for our dream ho...
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Carrie B
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14
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906
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WEDNESDAY AL-ANON MEETING 9 AM (EST)
(Preview)
WEDNESDAY AL-ANON MEETING 9 AM (EST) TOPICS: Love; Fear; Focusing on Ourselves The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html. There are other ways to join the room also. Using mIRC or other chat client, the server we use is irc.chat4all.org, port 6...
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shimo
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0
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246
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When does it stop?
(Preview)
Hi, im new to this and not to sure how it works,. from reading so many stories it hard to believe that so many people are in the same situation as me. My husband has always liked a drink on social occasions the same as myself, but over the last 5-6 years it got more and more. He tries to hide it and tells lies a...
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drivingmecrazy
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2
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489
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Lecture to my parents
(Preview)
I received news today from one of my cousins that my youngest cousin had shown up on my parents' doorstep at 3 in the morning after having just gotten out of the mental ward and picking up a DUI. Some background: I have stated that I had an alcoholic uncle before. I also have a couple alcoholic cousins...
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pinkchip
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10
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710
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Sick to my stomach
(Preview)
So I kicked my AH out of the house last night. Thinking back I should have waited until this morning.. at least that is what one of my al anon friends had mentioned but I just couldn't do it anymore. I had told him what my limit was and he crossed the line. He had taken the day off to look for cars and was sup...
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Jazzie18
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17
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729
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SO Angry
(Preview)
And, I just have to get this off my chest. My wife is home today, said she would take care of some things, give the dogs some attention. Great. Well, she decided to "test" one of our dogs to see if he would come back inside if she let him out to potty without a leash. First time, he came back. Seco...
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Skorpi
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23
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721
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Give him the info or leave it alone?
(Preview)
So yesterday my AH proclaimed for the 9,578,559th time that he was going to stop drinking. I no longer listen to any of those promises (even though deep down, I wish one day it will be for real). He came home from work with the typical complaints about EVERYTHING. He works for his family, so there are mul...
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CoopsMom
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8
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518
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need guidance
(Preview)
Is there sight on here dealing and coping with mental illness due to steer dealing with sobriety .
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Wisdom67
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10
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639
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Pushing Thru...
(Preview)
That Moment when you Know your Heading tords the Pity Pot, Yet Still Keep Moving Forward... I Truly have No Reason, I Had an Amazing Weekend with Tons of Wonderful God Filled Moments, Road My Harley with a Group of Peeps I Never Met, Shared Laughs with Strangers, Seen Gods work in Action along a Beautifu...
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Jozie
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6
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525
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Hope For Today April 21
(Preview)
Good Morning Everyone: Today's reading mentions that one sign of maturity is the ability to listen to and consider the opinions of others. This one resonates with me as although I have considered myself to be an openminded person, I also have had that deep down feeling that it was my viewpoint which w...
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yanksfan51
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3
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556
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How to talk about it when they won't
(Preview)
It's been awhile since I've been on here. I would call my AH a high functioning alcoholic,,he holds good job and drinks heavily on the weekends. Well, now "weekends" include Thursday nights. He's a different person than the sober one, I miss the sober one. I cannot talk to him about how...
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Seahorse7
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6
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643
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When your AH takes on an additional addiction to combat the drinking (LOL)
(Preview)
My husband recently took up smoking marijuana (in his mind/manipulation) to reduce the drinking and the effects it has on our marriage and our children. LOL WHAT??? I'm trying to find the humor in this because it is just so ridiculous I can't even begin to explain my thought processes here. Of course,...
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watchdog1999
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12
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573
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ODAT 4-20
(Preview)
The ODA T reading for April 20 talks about the slogans. It points out that Al-Anon is not an easy program to implement and at times we tend to become discouraged, especially if we fall back into old behavior. The reading points out that:"Easy does it ",is a perfect slogan when we feel rushed...
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hotrod
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2
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287
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Anticipating Drama
(Preview)
I've spent all weekend with the ABF and he has been super healthy sounding. He has been talking about his recovery and is doing well. He goes to court on one of his DUI charges tomorrow and will most likely go into a DUI program where he gets screened every day and has to attend meetings for the next 24 month...
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kspec85
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6
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499
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Remnding me of JerryF
(Preview)
This book I borrowed, I just finished it tearfully, and in the afterward there are two things I want to pass on - the first, because it seems to be a different take on Jerry's "put me where you want me": "Where I am calling you, will you follow me, and do you love me enough to trust me with you...
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likemyheart
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3
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440
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does anyone have experience with coping with a family member titrating off of methadone? or anything?? i need support
(Preview)
hello... my fiancé is titrating off of methadone. he has become flat and emotionless. he'll ignore me all night. he is extremely focused on a game on his computer. i am not sure if this is the methadone or what is happening. he does not share much about what he is going through unless i ask. he says that he...
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psychszsd
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2
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4854
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C2C 4-19
(Preview)
The C2C reading for April 19 speaks about alcoholism being a disease. It points out that by attending meetings and working the steps we will readily accept the fact that alcoholics are suffering from an illness and are not simply bad people. By accepting this reality, we are able to identify what is...
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hotrod
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3
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435
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Interesting Discussion .... Your thoughts?
(Preview)
Last night my AH and I were having a discussion about his sister, who I will kindly referred to as a bit "eccentric". He always has difficulty dealing with her thought processess whenever she e-mails or writes him. She actually lives in the same town that we do, but her topics and requests...
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Debb
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7
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533
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Hatred and anger does not kill hatred and anger
(Preview)
I just read this in a book I borrowed - interesting thought, and true. I had so much anger, not sure about hatred, but anger definitely. Guy was in prison, wrongly convicted of something he didn't commit and the anger and hatred only left HIM broken, only hurt HIM. The conscious decision to let my anger g...
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likemyheart
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9
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614
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C2C 4=18
(Preview)
C2C reading for April 18 talks about how much time was spent yearning for things that we were not getting from the people in our lives, including the alcoholic. As part of our recovery, it is suggested that we put all of these needs on paper. The reading noted that most of the important issues that we are...
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hotrod
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1
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424
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Family vacation. How does it work for you?
(Preview)
Hello everyone! It is springtime here in Texas...birds are chirping, plants are blooming...life is beautiful! Planning a family vacation with an active AH is not. So here is the deal: our oldest daughter will graduate next year and my AH would like the whole family to go on a vacation before she gradu...
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Fairlee
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3
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485
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Guilt Vs Shame
(Preview)
I'm still emotionally IQ challenged about the two. When my feelings came up it was always colored with Angry/Sad, Angry/Happy, Angry/Joy, Angry/Angry, obviously there is a common denominator going on .. lol .. yes Anger has been my first last and middle name. That duality was the only way I could f...
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SerenityRUS
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14
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2309
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ODAAT 4=18
(Preview)
Not trying to one up Hotrod...I've read the page of the day in the C2C this morning and it is how she says and how it teaches. It is meaning for me. I love the pages because my mind doesn't always hold the messages where and when I need them and so my wife passed me on her ODAAT also...same page and the mess...
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Jerry F
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2
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347
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Pit in my stomach
(Preview)
Hi MIP, I've had a pit in my stomach lately... a gnawing kind of realization that I'm trying to push down somehow - but it keeps bubbling up. Four years into my 2nd marriage... (first one was a decade with dry A, and now 4 years) with on and off again sober AH - who for the time being has 60 days, a sponsor a ther...
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LedfootJenny
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10
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598
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feeling more secure...
(Preview)
I have good news that I want to share. I am so grateful for my new NP. I went to see her because there hasn't been too many good doctors near where I live. I traveled 60 miles one way to get good treatment. My concerns are less pressing. I am willing to do whatever it takes to stay well. I have not been taking ver...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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343
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Can't Bring Myself to Go to F2F Meetings
(Preview)
Hey all. The boyfriend is out of jail and so far so good, he hasn't used. I guess that's good? He is going to a meeting today (he says). We will see. Everything he says is sounding great and I am being supportive and not further shaming him for "the incident". I work a LOT and I also have three litt...
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kspec85
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12
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656
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Hello I'm a new member
(Preview)
Hello, I am a new member to here and quite new to al anon. I have two adult sons one 18 and one is 24, living with me and I am affected by their drinking and behavior. I dont feel ready or willing to do drastic action such as ask them to leave, although from time to time I have wanted them to leave and wished they w...
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scoob09
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7
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548
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Service
(Preview)
My sponsor isn't let it go either ... LOL. I'm glad however I swear there are just not enough hours in the day. It does force the issue of me attending my one meeting a week .. it is way way way to easy to get out of the groove on that one. I can tell the difference when I go and when I go and when I don't .. it make...
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SerenityRUS
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2
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323
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The Great Distraction
(Preview)
I received a picture message before from Abf's brother. It is of a clean-shaven, short haired ABF. My immediate thought was "But where will all of the woodland creatures live now?" Next came a surprisingly long message from ABF himself (he's more or less illiterate and tends to write in mo...
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missmeliss
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14
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595
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Do I confront him on ths or will it do me no good?
(
1 2
)
(Preview)
H hasn't been to work in 6 weeks. 2 weeks were in rehab and the other 4 were just not going in. You can thank the FMLA for keeping him employed under false pretenses of a hurting back. He wasn't home when I got home this afternoon but I didn't believe he was at work. So I start my detective work. First off I chec...
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Mapper
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69
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1298
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Blessed beyound words...
(Preview)
l Just love the miracles...specially the personal ones. Last Sunday my wife and I met with and spent time with a sponsee and his Alky mother. She doesn't win the staying alive award nor he the entrenched in sanity one...but as he kept hanging with his AA program and Al-Anon lessons he stayed alive an...
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Jerry F
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7
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497
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step 3 works
(Preview)
'Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood him' im getting better at this step. I say it most mornings and try to think about the words. It tells me i can choose, its do-able, i can decide here and now, its a choice. For every part of my day i can think and make a choic...
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el-cee
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4
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513
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Hope For Today April 17
(Preview)
Today's reading was a good reminder for me, it speaks on my perspective and not having expectations. When I know I am going to be around people that trigger me, have the ism's or are A's in my life, am I able to accept them right where they are and enjoy them in the here and now as is. I know I can work on mysel...
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Breakingfree
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1
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412
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Win.
(Preview)
Took daughter for her assessment today (so she can see a counsellor). She has been talking to me in a really productive way and has been willing to discuss setting some better ground rules with me (sleeping more, eating breakfast, not isolating herself, less screen time, basic self-care stuff tha...
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missmeliss
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5
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424
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Reflections
(Preview)
Tonight, I have been thinking about myself and my current relationship. I have been thinking about my actions, and why I react the way I do. When I was in high school, I read A Doll's House by Henrik Ibsen, and my class took a trip to the BIG theater in the metropolitan state capitol city to see a producti...
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Skorpi
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7
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580
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Not afraid of putting my feet down.
(Preview)
Daughter's birthday is this weekend (actually on Monday). I am celebrating with her on Sat and apparently exAH is celebrating with her on Monday. Today exIn-Laws txt me saying they are busy this weekend and asking if they can come over on the next weekend to see daughter and give her presents. I reply w...
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Luiza
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9
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476
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Met someone...she's a recovering alcoholic...I'm an ACA
(Preview)
Hello, all. I'm 57, was "diagnosed" as an ACA a few years ago. I'm divorced for the second time (my choice, no drama, still friends). I met someone through one of those dating websites. In our first (so far) date, she told me she was a recovering alcoholic, has been C&S for over 18 years. F...
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Old School
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4
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540
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protecting the source of information
(Preview)
Yesterday I was speaking to a dear friend who learned that her boyfriend has been drinking problematically lately and has been taking steps to cover it up. She is understandably disheartened, but concerned about how to confront the boyfriend as the source of the information was his 15 year old son,...
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drywit44
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2
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304
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AH 1 year sober
(Preview)
Hey everyone! My AH celebrated his 1 year sobriety on Friday. I attended his Friday meeting with him and watched him celebrate with several of his new friends, talk about his journey and get his chip. I know what hard work this is for him and I do feel proud he made it a year. I just wish it wasn't under force...
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Flower49
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10
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746
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advice needed
(Preview)
well,ah's cellphone keep buzzing and he left it home so when i got it to turn it off..it had a text between a friend of ah's discusing a deal of the pal's to leave vodka and grass under ah,s and mine garage door. i knew something was up anyway because ah was acting especially antsy and going into the garage...
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YARNCRAZY
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5
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529
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Lots of Growth, Hardship and Blooming going on...
(Preview)
Sometimes I am just so happy even in the midst of my hardships and others to hear, see and experience the growth, to watch al-anoners support each other with love, watering each others roots until we are ready to bloom. Lately I have seen and felt so much love and growth here on MIP and in my weekly meet...
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Breakingfree
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4
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433
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Barretts Esophagus
(Preview)
My husband had his Upper Endoscopy yesterday. Along with A "Handfull of Ulcers" in his stomach, he has Barretts Esophagus. Something that COULD lead to cancer of the esophagus. They gave him Prilosec (sp) They want to do another endoscopy in 2 months to see if it is healing, but my husband s...
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Tired-of-it
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4
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377
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C2C 4-16
(Preview)
The Courage to Change for April 16 has a very important message. It points out that what we go through in life is not as important as how we interpret the experience, and respond to it. To sum it up, we have powerful choices about our attitude in life. Al-Anon opening tells us that changed attitudes can a...
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hotrod
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0
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379
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Stress. My head is going to pop.
(Preview)
In one week, more crap has gone wrong at work than I could ever imagine possible. I think I complained like a week ago...and it got worse. I know it is just work. I can compartmentalize it some. Most of my staff quit. I will be doing all their work in the meanwhile. PLUS about 3 other crazy incidents happen...
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pinkchip
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32
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1040
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ODAT 4-15
(Preview)
The ODAT reading for April 15 speaks about our old attitudes of believing I that we are justified in getting angry at anyone in an alcoholic fog. . It points out that if we accept the truth that alcohol is a disease, we will understand the accusations and outbursts of tempers cannot improve the situati...
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hotrod
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4
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368
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Husband gets out of inpatient treatment tomorrow.
(Preview)
I've been with my husband 10 years and married for almost 5. He has drank almost every single day since I've known him. Sometimes it's 1 or 2 beers and other days it's nonstop drinking from the time he gets home until he goes to bed. He's very high functioning and sometimes people can't even tell he's drun...
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Mapper
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22
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919
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Working on serenity
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, Well, this last week has certainly been ... interesting. I got myself into a few situations with active alcoholic friends of my wife that I knew I shouldn't be in, and I had to deal with an unexpected medical issue myself. I think that this last week has been proof to me that AlAnon works w...
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Skorpi
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13
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566
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seething
(Preview)
Oh wow, I am seething. I got a text this morning from daughter's step-mother telling me that she is concerned that my daughter is staying up too late as she saw her post something on facebook late at night. If it was an isolated incident it wouldn't matter but it has been 9 years of this....letters texts a...
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missmeliss
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27
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1023
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Feeling emotional(in a good way)
(Preview)
Tonight I was asked to share my story at a meeting. I had agreed to do this 2 months ago but didn't start preparing until today, LOL. I just prayed for God to guide my words, for him to help me put my thoughts together and for my words to reach those who needed to hear what I had to say. At one point I looked to t...
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andromeda
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6
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494
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Not sure what I am going through, but it's different by far
(Preview)
I am stressed to the hilt with two exams this week and more loss of a beautiful al-anon old timer. Also an RN friend of mine has had Crohn's for awhile and just had emergency surgery and lost some intestine and now has a colostomy, just makes me realize you just never know, so dig into this moment! I am hav...
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Breakingfree
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4
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634
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Why is spirituality so frustrating?
(Preview)
Just when I think i have got it all worked out. I realize Im at the beginning again. My ego sneaks into my progress and inflates while I am not looking and then I see it and I am like, I thought I dealt with you already!!!!!! I think im still fighting without even realising it. Im thinking I need to get down and...
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el-cee
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10
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568
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Need a sponsor
(Preview)
Hello, I have been to so many meetings and nobody sponsors. It's really hard. I have already worked the 12 steps the past year with a former Sponsor. I just need someone to email or talk to on phone for about 15 minutes a week to vent or get a perspective. My friends don't have experience in this field so th...
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angelainaz
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5
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682
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Alcoholic Phone Calls
(Preview)
I long ago gave up expecting every phone call to be perfect, but what sort of approaches do other people take if you receive a phone call from someone who has been drinking? It is something I still struggle with 7 years into the program. Had a call yesterday and all of the isms like insulting and forgettin...
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hopefortoday29
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12
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871
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I am getting scared of people.
(Preview)
Hi guys long time no speak. I am having some issues with people at the moment and I am a little bit lost to be honest. I have been on Easter holiday for nearly two weeks now, we are all back to work next Monday. On the last day of work I had an interview with one of the big bosses for my performance review and I got...
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Luiza
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8
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776
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Life just keeps coming full speed ahead
(Preview)
I have two exams this week and am feeling the stress this semester of college, but can and will get through it. A great al-anon lady I have known the last several years died last Friday after her liver transplant was rejected by her body. I had been praying for her and missing my sponsor too lately. These...
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Breakingfree
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5
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629
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