Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for June 20 speaks about living with the disease of alcoholism and how we unconsciously develop negative coping tools to protect ourselves from the insanity of the disease. The reading suggests that we often" react :out of fear -- go silent, and keep quiet when confronted ins...

Tampa · Tampa

No matter what I do or how hard I work the steps I find myself after a period of time losing it. Today my active qualifier went out to pick up some tea and powerade for me and to stop by Sears for a sparkplug. He was gone for three hours and my thoughts were racing. I tried calling him and he ignored calls, no res...

lookingup · lookingup

I'm haveing good days when I'm with healthy ppl but wen I'm alone which I live alone I get depressed my freind told me I'd better be careful or I'd fall into another bad relationship,prolly true.im doing good today so all I can do is take one day at a time ,even baby steps........thanks for listening hugs...

Flower49 · Flower49

I am trying to figure out how to discuss this with my A. We have some boundaries in place that we both agreed on. One is that if he knows he will not be home within 20 minutes after work, AA whatever it is he is doing he will call and I too do the same. As of the past couple of weeks, suddenly he no longer calls and w...

missmeliss · missmeliss

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vt1Pwfnh5pc

Debb · Debb

Something dawned on me just now and I googled it ... What part does alcohol consumption play in increasing estrogen in a drinker? I noticed that when AH is beside himself he acts like someone who is not only out of control with emotions but like someone whose hormones are raging as well. I discovered...

hotrod · hotrod

C2C reading for today speaks about taking everything that happens personally and that by doing this I remain a victim and blame others for my discomfort. Accepting life on life's terms is the key . The reading emphasizes the fact that things will not always go our way and that learning how to acc...

missmeliss · missmeliss

I seem to have to learn this lesson over and over and over and over and over. Knowing the pitfalls, knowing the outcomes and knowing the wrong course of action through tried and tested experience just doesn't make bad decisions work any better! For example, for various reasons I am 2 weeks into an 8 week...

KrissySmith · KrissySmith

Seventeen years ago I was attending family week at my then newly wedded husband's rehab facility after he was arrested for dealing drugs. I met a woman in her early forties, whose husband had held a high profile job in their small town before he made headlines for a drunk driving accident. She said it wa...

Mirandac · Mirandac

I guess i needed a reality check. I stated how i felt in an email to ex in just a basic way. Stated i needed more time to move out i was trying to do too much and having a hard time emotionally. I only said "i was hurt very deeply by someone i thought i knew and had trusted" He spins it back that i ha...

Debb · Debb

I am going to share some of what I wrote when in the process of working the the first ten steps and thought I would start at the beginning, with Step 1:We admitted we were powerless over the Alcoholic that our lives had become unmanageable.I began Step One in May of last year, it was a huge relief admitting...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's C2C is one that resonated deeply within my mind and heart early on in my AlAnon journey; it is one of the key texts that allowed me to see the 'Why' and 'How' of Detachment with love. AlAnon introduced me to the concept of allowing the A to face the consequences of their actions; the concept that th...

hotrod · hotrod

Tradition 11 has been posted to the Step Work BoardLearn How The Twelve Steps and Traditions Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery Here is the link http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t60...

mjferg · mjferg

I have been learning a lot about myself the past couple of weeks.As I reflect on some of my decisions and choices.I realize I am very passive.There have been many times that I have a voice screaming inside my head to say something to someone and I am afraid.I know it goes way back to when I was a child,I didn...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's HfT addresses the internal struggles that can accompany step 8. The Thought for the Day reminds us that true healing from the pain we hold from alcoholic behavior begins only when we accept that it was caused by alcohol the disease, not the alcoholic. This thought, along with today's C2C offe...

Jazzie18 · Jazzie18

My husband detoxed last week - last drink was Monday. Tuesday and Wednesday he was at home feeling sick and Thursday he was so bad that I finally took him to the ER (he felt so bad that he didn't agrue with me). He was admitted for two nights and let me say thank god for Adavin as his symptoms went away prett...

Debb · Debb

Working Step 5 Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to anotherhuman being the exact nature of our wrongsUnderstanding that the fear, resentment and lack of confidence that I developed from AH's verbal abuse was holding me back from being a compassionate human being with others and myself. Understa...

Tossed Salad · Tossed Salad

I haven't posted in a while but need to shout out how grateful I am for this program! I would not be where I am today without it and I am so very grateful. I filed led for divorce in January and Murphy's Law has been in full effect with the progression of things. What should have been a six week process is st...

ashes · ashes

Hi all, I don't really know where to begin with this so I'm going to start here. I have been to a few Al-Anon meetings. everyone was very nice and very welcoming. I put off going for a long time because I was just scared about it, what if I met someone I knew. I have not yet shared at a meeting, I'm not very open a...

gillygilly · gillygilly

I'm sitting with an agitated anxious feeling tonight that I'm very familiar with. I don't know whether it's an al anon feeling, ie related to living with the effects of alcoholism, or whether it's just normal human life, or whether it's just me, so would be interested to hear any ESH. it would be espe...

missmeliss · missmeliss

I wanted to thank everyone for their responses. I am sorry my question ended up being so weird and maybe patronising. I was actually trying to gain some understanding for myself, to work through a relationship issue I am having. I wasn't meaning to be a weird nosey ghoul. I just found, the question was s...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading reminds us that we each have our own path in life and in recovery. It suggests that when we arrive at Al-Anon, many of us resent others who appear to have less troubled lives. The program helps us to understand and accept that we are all special and different. We always have exactly wh...

Debb · Debb

Guide to completing Step 4Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves I believe everyone needs are undoubtedly different, our lives are all different, so it makes sense to me that our needs and moral inventories would be different as well. I always believed that everyone has the pro...

Confused2379 · Confused2379

I am out of town and I'm feeling depressed because I have not been to a meeting in a week. I miss the connection that I get from listening to other alanon people. i know my plight has to do with my AH. He is still actively drinking and living with OW. I felt I had to leave my home because I cannot take his drin...

mjferg · mjferg

I have been seeing a lot of posts about changing the A.How can I make him or her change?How can I help him or her see?I lived like that for so long,I believed it.After becoming miserable with my life I started this program and I have learned that it is always about changing me.The first question I asked mys...

missmeliss · missmeliss

I've been contemplating seeing a therapist for a long time now. Recently, daughter has started having some counselling and what both her school counsellor and her new extra-curricular counsellor have said to me is that "You should seek some support for yourself, mum". I felt that they m...

el-cee · el-cee

Ive been slipping lately with my program. Other things have distracted me, some of which ive shared here. Ive kind of lost touch with what im all about. Im redefining myself or other aspects of myself and ive stopped being honest and taking that honest look at my shortcomings and assets. Ive had the reb...

Lovejailed · Lovejailed

2 weeks ago my Ah had his first aggressive outburst. The ac and door were his victims. that was enough for me to ask him to leave. I have worked and am still working on this with my therapist. I have set up a meeting with a separate therapist for some couples therapy. I have explained to my AH that we need to st...

mjferg · mjferg

I am on my 2 week break from college.I have been waiting on this break and looking forward to enjoying some summer weather.It has been pouring rain,very cloudy and dreary.Forecast is rain,lots of it,for the whole 2 weeks.Sigh!I am just feeling grumpy today,I still have a lot of work to do on my house,i...

Dave2554 · Dave2554

It's amazing how quickly one can lose their serenity ... and in this case it has nothing to do with my A. My Mom is suffering from her own progressive disease, which I didn't cause, I can't cure, and I can't control. But, the Al-Anonic in me certainly wants to try and control or take responsibility for ho...

lookingup · lookingup

I don't really know where to start cause if I start at the beginning I'll be typing all night and through tomorrow,lol,not that my life has been in any way a pleasant life in the last year and a half,well here goes the worst parts anyway yall know how hard headed I am ouch!!!!! My head hurts I get what I deser...

mjferg · mjferg

I have an ex husband who lives in another state.We have been divorced for 12 years.He is an alcoholic,who is now in recovery?Well,that is what he says.We haven't seen each other or been together in those 12 years.The only contact we have had is the occasional Facebook comment. Once in a while we like so...

Mirandac · Mirandac

i found a nice apartment and will start to move in this week. I am to be out of my home by Monday. My xah gets the home i asked for time to sort and clean out. I hope i will not need to return. I am throwing away junk, papers and just plain old stuff. Giving the good stuff away or bringing it somewhere. i am not t...

Bethany66 · Bethany66

As I continue on my journey with my new tool bag thanks to Al-Anon, I am trying to spend less time thinking about the character defects in others and more time reflecting on the issues in my own heart and mind that need tending. So much of who I am at (gulp!!) almost 50 years old (gasp!!) is not serving me...

Mark17 · Mark17

I'm training for a marathon and today I'm supposed to do 12 miles. I'm not at all happy right now, though. I did it! I broke free of my XAW! The divorce was final about one month ago. I remember reading _How Al-Anon Works_ about one year ago and being surprised how many of those marriages ended up in divo...

Doingmybest · Doingmybest

i don't really know where to start, so I'll just spit it out.....ah started AA almost 3 months ago during a major crisis. He does seem to have hit his bottom, but wo knows. It took a while to detox at home, but he has just over 2 months of sobriety(, a sponsor, and regular AA attendance. He is working the p...

Debb · Debb

Step 2: Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanityI define a Power greater than me as my HP = my God the Father. I truly believe that he loves and cares for everyone. I talk to him everyday in my prayers and expressions of gratitude for everything he has helped me with, i...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Despite all the drunkenness, I finished my edits and deposited. YAY!!!!! I actually am graduating! My wife spoke with her lawyer and found out she has to have 20-90 days in jail or on electric monitoring. She is changing her address to her mom's house. She is going to live at her mom's because we live 2...

almostThere · almostThere

Journaling for a brief moment here. I just spilled a whole cup of coffee. Went all over. On the rug. On the table. My knee-jerk reaction was to shout a few choice words and angrily get up and start the cleaning process, and refill the kettle and slam it down on the stove because now I have to make more cof...

chelsea girl 24 · chelsea girl 24

Hi Everyone, I am struggling with my anger towards my husband. He has been sober for 10+ years without any program. He has always been hard on my son (not his) and I have spoken and warned him to stop with the harsh words. Anyway as you all know my son has been struggling since returning from visiting h...

tortuga · tortuga

Hello all, It has been quite a while. The reason, i am on a journey, geographically, mentally, spiritually! So know i want to share with you what i have learned so far, especially with those who hang in that moment where we think life will never be good again. It will! I have been through mental abuse with...

el-cee · el-cee

Theres been a lot of posts about grief and to be honest im not too sure what it is. Im looking for clarity. When my relationship ended i did have sad days, it was disappointing that the plans we made were not met but really I was glad to be free of the misery of it all. My life started from that moment to be hones...

gabigail · gabigail

I have been to f2f meetings for a year, but haven't been going for a year after the group dissolved. So I am here. I know in my f2f meetings there were lines used all the time. I didn't realize they were particularly used in the program. I still consider myself a newbie in the program, as I am only on steps 1...

Clara75 · Clara75

Hi, I've been visiting here ever day for months, since my AGF started drinking again in march. I find the support and hope you all share so helpful and I've been trying to learn to detach and learn a better way of dealing with this. I've started going to alanon again, I wanted to go tonight but she's so dru...

hopefortoday29 · hopefortoday29

My whole body feels like it is feeling emotional pain right now. It is past emotional pain not current but my whole throat feels like it is on fire and my stomach was in knots until a few minutes ago when I logged in. My partner is away this week and we have just put our dog in kennels to be looked after for a few...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good Morning Everybody: Today's reading is about Step Five -- for the writer, how difficult to was to admit God, self and others the exact nature of his/her wrongs. The writer talks of a sense of shame about admitting the defects that turned up when they took their inventory. I was so fortunate in tha...

Koko · Koko

My three 2.5 year sober AH of four years AH is often a dry drunk... Fun,eh? I have a 14 year old son. When we got married ah was sober and we merged our families together... Disasterously..... my my son was the youngest of the step kids...l we moved into their house. I did not realize the extent of the dis...

LedfootJenny · LedfootJenny

What is wrong with my brain anyway? LOL. Just found out I may NOT be homeless and MAY be able to purchase a home... and immediately my head starting ruminating over all the failed financial endeavors my AH has gotten himself into. Then I let the fear slip in - like well, if he has another relapse, or does...

Newlife girl · Newlife girl

I am wondering if I feel anxious partly from not posting here as often. My AH filed bankruptcy so the house is not foreclosing yet. When I mention to him he hasn't helped me support our daughter, he claims he has "saved" the house by filing bakruptcy...knstead of giving me any money for our da...

Truth · Truth

I am so grateful and happy and just love my new life. It took five long years of pulling things together but it was so worth it

Wishing you all joy and happiness on your journey

Quakeroat · Quakeroat

my thoughts this morning were automatically on the life saving program we have been so freely given. if I was to answer what was the best gift anyone ever gave me it would have to be the steps. my gratitude to my Higher Power and the people can't be expressed more. my thinking has changed from constant com...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today, the reading discusses the 'weapon' of sarcasm - the cutting remark, the snide innuendo, the scornful answer. The reading talks about if we could see ourselves using this weapon, we would not be proud. The reading also discusses that using sarcasm may give momentary satisfaction in scoring...

Debb · Debb

When AH gets nasty and argumentative and goes into what I call the Dr. Jekyll routine, I have found that the most useful Al-Anon tool to use to say no is: J.A.D.E.You do not need to:JustifyArgueDefendExplainIt is the disease, not you or them that is creating the chaos. The ability to DETACH with love...

jamky · jamky

My wife asked me to write a poem for her recovery group to read at a poetry reading I came up with this, it's not a poem really but I think it conveys what I've seen' Can I get some feedback if this is appropriate or not? The Seduction Day One: Hi good looking, nice to meet you. I see you're worried, tired, y...

Dave2554 · Dave2554

The last 8 months have brought both my AW and I to our own respective recoveries. We are both working our programs, and doing a good job of staying on our side of the street. I'm staying out of her program ... and she out of mine. The dillema, at least as I percieve it today, is that in working our own progr...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for June 14 continues the discussion on the Steps so that it offers some powerful insights into the 12th Step. The reading points out that after completing the Steps we realize what a wonderful gift the program truly is. It offers us an understanding of the disease, the tools to change o...

Koko · Koko

My ex Ah /ACOA and I were married 18 years and have a beautiful son. We divorced almost 5 years ago. I finally gave up.. Four different counsellors in the last eight years of the marriage and the constant fighting.... He did not want the divorce. But his drinking created Jekyll and Hyde at home... He o...

missmeliss · missmeliss

I had some thoughts about how it must be difficult. Then I thought my thoughts were stupid so I deleted them. I was just thinking, being gay would add an element of "proving yourself". Like people would challenge your feelings in the first place so it would make it extra hard to leave a relat...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for today, June 13 reflects on my favorite step-- Step 11. I know it is suggested that these steps be worked in order, however when I entered program Steps four and five seemed so overwhelming that I jumped immediately to Step 11, which suggests that we:"Seek through prayer and...

texasgal · texasgal

It has been awhile since I have logged in and for the most part I have been doing well. I had to stop internet for a bit so that I could pay some things. Which leads me to my resentfulness. My ex never paid for the lawyer for the divorce and gave me the run around. I had to wait 6 months in my new county and I fi...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	C2C 6-20 (Preview) The C2C reading for June 20 speaks about living with the disease of alcoholism and how we unconsciously develop negative coping tools to protect ourselves from the insanity of the disease. The reading suggests that we often" react :out of fear -- go silent, and keep quiet when confronted ins...	hotrod	5	353	Jun 20, 2015 by Truth
	I've done it now (Preview) No matter what I do or how hard I work the steps I find myself after a period of time losing it. Today my active qualifier went out to pick up some tea and powerade for me and to stop by Sears for a sparkplug. He was gone for three hours and my thoughts were racing. I tried calling him and he ignored calls, no res...	Tampa	12	699	Jun 20, 2015 by Jerry F
	Good days and bad days (Preview) I'm haveing good days when I'm with healthy ppl but wen I'm alone which I live alone I get depressed my freind told me I'd better be careful or I'd fall into another bad relationship,prolly true.im doing good today so all I can do is take one day at a time ,even baby steps........thanks for listening hugs...	lookingup	8	599	Jun 20, 2015 by Jerry F
	Boundaries (Preview) I am trying to figure out how to discuss this with my A. We have some boundaries in place that we both agreed on. One is that if he knows he will not be home within 20 minutes after work, AA whatever it is he is doing he will call and I too do the same. As of the past couple of weeks, suddenly he no longer calls and w...	Flower49	11	697	Jun 20, 2015 by Iamhere
	johnny cash (Preview) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vt1Pwfnh5pc	missmeliss	3	474	Jun 20, 2015 by almostThere
	I had no idea!! (Preview) Something dawned on me just now and I googled it ... What part does alcohol consumption play in increasing estrogen in a drinker? I noticed that when AH is beside himself he acts like someone who is not only out of control with emotions but like someone whose hormones are raging as well. I discovered...	Debb	18	770	Jun 20, 2015 by Iamhere
	C2C reading 6-19 (Preview) C2C reading for today speaks about taking everything that happens personally and that by doing this I remain a victim and blame others for my discomfort. Accepting life on life's terms is the key . The reading emphasizes the fact that things will not always go our way and that learning how to acc...	hotrod	9	494	Jun 20, 2015 by Mark17
	Awareness won't do it for me! (Preview) I seem to have to learn this lesson over and over and over and over and over. Knowing the pitfalls, knowing the outcomes and knowing the wrong course of action through tried and tested experience just doesn't make bad decisions work any better! For example, for various reasons I am 2 weeks into an 8 week...	missmeliss	9	864	Jun 20, 2015 by Mark17
	Lurked for a bit and then took the plunge. (Preview) Seventeen years ago I was attending family week at my then newly wedded husband's rehab facility after he was arrested for dealing drugs. I met a woman in her early forties, whose husband had held a high profile job in their small town before he made headlines for a drunk driving accident. She said it wa...	KrissySmith	5	588	Jun 20, 2015 by Mark17
	Relearn my lessons (Preview) I guess i needed a reality check. I stated how i felt in an email to ex in just a basic way. Stated i needed more time to move out i was trying to do too much and having a hard time emotionally. I only said "i was hurt very deeply by someone i thought i knew and had trusted" He spins it back that i ha...	Mirandac	12	645	Jun 20, 2015 by Mirandac
	My Experience Working Step 1 (Preview) I am going to share some of what I wrote when in the process of working the the first ten steps and thought I would start at the beginning, with Step 1:We admitted we were powerless over the Alcoholic that our lives had become unmanageable.I began Step One in May of last year, it was a huge relief admitting...	Debb	4	2446	Jun 20, 2015 by Mark17
	C2C - Detachment With Love...Why? (Preview) Today's C2C is one that resonated deeply within my mind and heart early on in my AlAnon journey; it is one of the key texts that allowed me to see the 'Why' and 'How' of Detachment with love. AlAnon introduced me to the concept of allowing the A to face the consequences of their actions; the concept that th...	Enigmatic	11	709	Jun 20, 2015 by Jock
	Tradition 11 (Preview) Tradition 11 has been posted to the Step Work BoardLearn How The Twelve Steps and Traditions Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery Here is the link http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t60...	hotrod	0	281	Jun 19, 2015 by hotrod
	Crap! (Preview) I have been learning a lot about myself the past couple of weeks.As I reflect on some of my decisions and choices.I realize I am very passive.There have been many times that I have a voice screaming inside my head to say something to someone and I am afraid.I know it goes way back to when I was a child,I didn...	mjferg	7	552	Jun 19, 2015 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today 6-19 - Alcoholic vs Disease of Alcoholism: Our Recovery (Preview) Today's HfT addresses the internal struggles that can accompany step 8. The Thought for the Day reminds us that true healing from the pain we hold from alcoholic behavior begins only when we accept that it was caused by alcohol the disease, not the alcoholic. This thought, along with today's C2C offe...	Enigmatic	2	467	Jun 19, 2015 by hotrod
	Inpatient vs. Outpatient therapy (Preview) My husband detoxed last week - last drink was Monday. Tuesday and Wednesday he was at home feeling sick and Thursday he was so bad that I finally took him to the ER (he felt so bad that he didn't agrue with me). He was admitted for two nights and let me say thank god for Adavin as his symptoms went away prett...	Jazzie18	5	613	Jun 19, 2015 by Jerry F
	Had to Admit!! (Preview) Working Step 5 Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to anotherhuman being the exact nature of our wrongsUnderstanding that the fear, resentment and lack of confidence that I developed from AH's verbal abuse was holding me back from being a compassionate human being with others and myself. Understa...	Debb	2	461	Jun 19, 2015 by Iamhere
	It works if you work it! (Preview) I haven't posted in a while but need to shout out how grateful I am for this program! I would not be where I am today without it and I am so very grateful. I filed led for divorce in January and Murphy's Law has been in full effect with the progression of things. What should have been a six week process is st...	Tossed Salad	5	611	Jun 19, 2015 by Debb
	first post, first share (Preview) Hi all, I don't really know where to begin with this so I'm going to start here. I have been to a few Al-Anon meetings. everyone was very nice and very welcoming. I put off going for a long time because I was just scared about it, what if I met someone I knew. I have not yet shared at a meeting, I'm not very open a...	ashes	11	607	Jun 18, 2015 by ruthstoops
	Familiar feeling (Preview) I'm sitting with an agitated anxious feeling tonight that I'm very familiar with. I don't know whether it's an al anon feeling, ie related to living with the effects of alcoholism, or whether it's just normal human life, or whether it's just me, so would be interested to hear any ESH. it would be espe...	gillygilly	3	449	Jun 18, 2015 by Debb
	A note about my weird gay post (Preview) I wanted to thank everyone for their responses. I am sorry my question ended up being so weird and maybe patronising. I was actually trying to gain some understanding for myself, to work through a relationship issue I am having. I wasn't meaning to be a weird nosey ghoul. I just found, the question was s...	missmeliss	5	612	Jun 18, 2015 by Debb
	Courage to Change 6/18 C2C (Preview) Today's reading reminds us that we each have our own path in life and in recovery. It suggests that when we arrive at Al-Anon, many of us resent others who appear to have less troubled lives. The program helps us to understand and accept that we are all special and different. We always have exactly wh...	Iamhere	8	521	Jun 18, 2015 by Debb
	Guide to Moral Inventory (Preview) Guide to completing Step 4Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves I believe everyone needs are undoubtedly different, our lives are all different, so it makes sense to me that our needs and moral inventories would be different as well. I always believed that everyone has the pro...	Debb	4	2448	Jun 18, 2015 by hotrod
	I need a meeting!! (Preview) I am out of town and I'm feeling depressed because I have not been to a meeting in a week. I miss the connection that I get from listening to other alanon people. i know my plight has to do with my AH. He is still actively drinking and living with OW. I felt I had to leave my home because I cannot take his drin...	Confused2379	1	320	Jun 18, 2015 by Iamhere
	What I have learned (Preview) I have been seeing a lot of posts about changing the A.How can I make him or her change?How can I help him or her see?I lived like that for so long,I believed it.After becoming miserable with my life I started this program and I have learned that it is always about changing me.The first question I asked mys...	mjferg	6	477	Jun 18, 2015 by missmeliss
	Pity Party (Preview) I've been contemplating seeing a therapist for a long time now. Recently, daughter has started having some counselling and what both her school counsellor and her new extra-curricular counsellor have said to me is that "You should seek some support for yourself, mum". I felt that they m...	missmeliss	14	908	Jun 18, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	no change without honesty (Preview) Ive been slipping lately with my program. Other things have distracted me, some of which ive shared here. Ive kind of lost touch with what im all about. Im redefining myself or other aspects of myself and ive stopped being honest and taking that honest look at my shortcomings and assets. Ive had the reb...	el-cee	7	501	Jun 18, 2015 by Mirandac
	Learning to be detached with love... Man it's hard and confusing. (Preview) 2 weeks ago my Ah had his first aggressive outburst. The ac and door were his victims. that was enough for me to ask him to leave. I have worked and am still working on this with my therapist. I have set up a meeting with a separate therapist for some couples therapy. I have explained to my AH that we need to st...	Lovejailed	9	527	Jun 18, 2015 by Lovejailed
	blah! (Preview) I am on my 2 week break from college.I have been waiting on this break and looking forward to enjoying some summer weather.It has been pouring rain,very cloudy and dreary.Forecast is rain,lots of it,for the whole 2 weeks.Sigh!I am just feeling grumpy today,I still have a lot of work to do on my house,i...	mjferg	1	351	Jun 18, 2015 by Iamhere
	Lost my Serenity this week ... (Preview) It's amazing how quickly one can lose their serenity ... and in this case it has nothing to do with my A. My Mom is suffering from her own progressive disease, which I didn't cause, I can't cure, and I can't control. But, the Al-Anonic in me certainly wants to try and control or take responsibility for ho...	Dave2554	6	630	Jun 18, 2015 by pinkchip
	Hello my dearest alanon family...it's me lookingup (Preview) I don't really know where to start cause if I start at the beginning I'll be typing all night and through tomorrow,lol,not that my life has been in any way a pleasant life in the last year and a half,well here goes the worst parts anyway yall know how hard headed I am ouch!!!!! My head hurts I get what I deser...	lookingup	3	476	Jun 17, 2015 by vorpal
	Another learning experience! (Preview) I have an ex husband who lives in another state.We have been divorced for 12 years.He is an alcoholic,who is now in recovery?Well,that is what he says.We haven't seen each other or been together in those 12 years.The only contact we have had is the occasional Facebook comment. Once in a while we like so...	mjferg	8	586	Jun 17, 2015 by mjferg
	Moving (Preview) i found a nice apartment and will start to move in this week. I am to be out of my home by Monday. My xah gets the home i asked for time to sort and clean out. I hope i will not need to return. I am throwing away junk, papers and just plain old stuff. Giving the good stuff away or bringing it somewhere. i am not t...	Mirandac	23	710	Jun 17, 2015 by Mirandac
	Taking time to focus on my own inventory - some tough issues (Preview) As I continue on my journey with my new tool bag thanks to Al-Anon, I am trying to spend less time thinking about the character defects in others and more time reflecting on the issues in my own heart and mind that need tending. So much of who I am at (gulp!!) almost 50 years old (gasp!!) is not serving me...	Bethany66	5	506	Jun 17, 2015 by el-cee
	12 miles on a day like this? (Preview) I'm training for a marathon and today I'm supposed to do 12 miles. I'm not at all happy right now, though. I did it! I broke free of my XAW! The divorce was final about one month ago. I remember reading _How Al-Anon Works_ about one year ago and being surprised how many of those marriages ended up in divo...	Mark17	11	858	Jun 17, 2015 by Mark17
	So very lonely for human touch (Preview) i don't really know where to start, so I'll just spit it out.....ah started AA almost 3 months ago during a major crisis. He does seem to have hit his bottom, but wo knows. It took a while to detox at home, but he has just over 2 months of sobriety(, a sponsor, and regular AA attendance. He is working the p...	Doingmybest	8	3546	Jun 17, 2015 by Mark17
	I came to believe .... (Preview) Step 2: *Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity*I define a Power greater than me as my HP = my God the Father. I truly believe that he loves and cares for everyone. I talk to him everyday in my prayers and expressions of gratitude for everything he has helped me with, i...	Debb	5	573	Jun 17, 2015 by Mark17
	Well.... I did it??? (Preview) Despite all the drunkenness, I finished my edits and deposited. YAY!!!!! I actually am graduating! My wife spoke with her lawyer and found out she has to have 20-90 days in jail or on electric monitoring. She is changing her address to her mom's house. She is going to live at her mom's because we live 2...	Skorpi	21	894	Jun 17, 2015 by tiredtonite
	Another one bites the dust... (Preview) Journaling for a brief moment here. I just spilled a whole cup of coffee. Went all over. On the rug. On the table. My knee-jerk reaction was to shout a few choice words and angrily get up and start the cleaning process, and refill the kettle and slam it down on the stove because now I have to make more cof...	almostThere	13	575	Jun 17, 2015 by pinkchip
	Dealing with anger (Preview) Hi Everyone, I am struggling with my anger towards my husband. He has been sober for 10+ years without any program. He has always been hard on my son (not his) and I have spoken and warned him to stop with the harsh words. Anyway as you all know my son has been struggling since returning from visiting h...	chelsea girl 24	8	596	Jun 16, 2015 by Koko
	Ex A got married... (Preview) Hello all, It has been quite a while. The reason, i am on a journey, geographically, mentally, spiritually! So know i want to share with you what i have learned so far, especially with those who hang in that moment where we think life will never be good again. It will! I have been through mental abuse with...	tortuga	5	543	Jun 16, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	what does grief mean? (Preview) Theres been a lot of posts about grief and to be honest im not too sure what it is. Im looking for clarity. When my relationship ended i did have sad days, it was disappointing that the plans we made were not met but really I was glad to be free of the misery of it all. My life started from that moment to be hones...	el-cee	15	1981	Jun 16, 2015 by lisal
	Alanon Slogans slogans (Preview) I have been to f2f meetings for a year, but haven't been going for a year after the group dissolved. So I am here. I know in my f2f meetings there were lines used all the time. I didn't realize they were particularly used in the program. I still consider myself a newbie in the program, as I am only on steps 1...	gabigail	11	5049	Jun 16, 2015 by Hoot Nanny
	Relapse (Preview) Hi, I've been visiting here ever day for months, since my AGF started drinking again in march. I find the support and hope you all share so helpful and I've been trying to learn to detach and learn a better way of dealing with this. I've started going to alanon again, I wanted to go tonight but she's so dru...	Clara75	11	612	Jun 16, 2015 by Iamhere
	Re-experiencing old emotions (Preview) My whole body feels like it is feeling emotional pain right now. It is past emotional pain not current but my whole throat feels like it is on fire and my stomach was in knots until a few minutes ago when I logged in. My partner is away this week and we have just put our dog in kennels to be looked after for a few...	hopefortoday29	2	461	Jun 16, 2015 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today June 16 (Preview) Good Morning Everybody: Today's reading is about Step Five -- for the writer, how difficult to was to admit God, self and others the exact nature of his/her wrongs. The writer talks of a sense of shame about admitting the defects that turned up when they took their inventory. I was so fortunate in tha...	yanksfan51	3	447	Jun 16, 2015 by Iamhere
	My kid and I are a packaged deal! (Preview) My three 2.5 year sober AH of four years AH is often a dry drunk... Fun,eh? I have a 14 year old son. When we got married ah was sober and we merged our families together... Disasterously..... my my son was the youngest of the step kids...l we moved into their house. I did not realize the extent of the dis...	Koko	6	608	Jun 15, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	BLAH!!! (Preview) What is wrong with my brain anyway? LOL. Just found out I may NOT be homeless and MAY be able to purchase a home... and immediately my head starting ruminating over all the failed financial endeavors my AH has gotten himself into. Then I let the fear slip in - like well, if he has another relapse, or does...	LedfootJenny	2	437	Jun 15, 2015 by Iamhere
	Feeling extremely anxious lately (Preview) I am wondering if I feel anxious partly from not posting here as often. My AH filed bankruptcy so the house is not foreclosing yet. When I mention to him he hasn't helped me support our daughter, he claims he has "saved" the house by filing bakruptcy...knstead of giving me any money for our da...	Newlife girl	7	552	Jun 15, 2015 by Jerry F
	Love my new life :-) (Preview) I am so grateful and happy and just love my new life. It took five long years of pulling things together but it was so worth it Wishing you all joy and happiness on your journey	Truth	5	383	Jun 15, 2015 by Mark17
	Life saving program (Preview) my thoughts this morning were automatically on the life saving program we have been so freely given. if I was to answer what was the best gift anyone ever gave me it would have to be the steps. my gratitude to my Higher Power and the people can't be expressed more. my thinking has changed from constant com...	Quakeroat	3	366	Jun 15, 2015 by Debb
	Courage to Change 6/15 (Preview) Today, the reading discusses the 'weapon' of sarcasm - the cutting remark, the snide innuendo, the scornful answer. The reading talks about if we could see ourselves using this weapon, we would not be proud. The reading also discusses that using sarcasm may give momentary satisfaction in scoring...	Iamhere	4	410	Jun 15, 2015 by Debb
	Letting Go and Using … J.A.D.E. (Preview) When AH gets nasty and argumentative and goes into what I call the Dr. Jekyll routine, I have found that the most useful Al-Anon tool to use to say no is: J.A.D.E.You do not need to:JustifyArgueDefendExplainIt is the disease, not you or them that is creating the chaos. The ability to DETACH with love...	Debb	2	419	Jun 15, 2015 by hotrod
	The Seduction (Preview) My wife asked me to write a poem for her recovery group to read at a poetry reading I came up with this, it's not a poem really but I think it conveys what I've seen' Can I get some feedback if this is appropriate or not? The Seduction Day One: Hi good looking, nice to meet you. I see you're worried, tired, y...	jamky	8	638	Jun 14, 2015 by jamky
	Dilemma of Recovery (Preview) The last 8 months have brought both my AW and I to our own respective recoveries. We are both working our programs, and doing a good job of staying on our side of the street. I'm staying out of her program ... and she out of mine. The dillema, at least as I percieve it today, is that in working our own progr...	Dave2554	15	877	Jun 14, 2015 by Dave2554
	C2C 6-14 (Preview) The C2C reading for June 14 continues the discussion on the Steps so that it offers some powerful insights into the 12th Step. The reading points out that after completing the Steps we realize what a wonderful gift the program truly is. It offers us an understanding of the disease, the tools to change o...	hotrod	7	459	Jun 14, 2015 by hotrod
	Grief or WHAT? (Preview) My ex Ah /ACOA and I were married 18 years and have a beautiful son. We divorced almost 5 years ago. I finally gave up.. Four different counsellors in the last eight years of the marriage and the constant fighting.... He did not want the divorce. But his drinking created Jekyll and Hyde at home... He o...	Koko	22	719	Jun 14, 2015 by Iamhere
	My thoughts on being LGBT in al-anon (Preview) I had some thoughts about how it must be difficult. Then I thought my thoughts were stupid so I deleted them. I was just thinking, being gay would add an element of "proving yourself". Like people would challenge your feelings in the first place so it would make it extra hard to leave a relat...	missmeliss	6	1237	Jun 14, 2015 by pinkchip
	C2C 6-13 (Preview) The C2C reading for today, June 13 reflects on my favorite step-- Step 11. I know it is suggested that these steps be worked in order, however when I entered program Steps four and five seemed so overwhelming that I jumped immediately to Step 11, which suggests that we:"Seek through prayer and...	hotrod	8	603	Jun 14, 2015 by Debb
	Resentful toward exAH (Preview) It has been awhile since I have logged in and for the most part I have been doing well. I had to stop internet for a bit so that I could pay some things. Which leads me to my resentfulness. My ex never paid for the lawyer for the divorce and gave me the run around. I had to wait 6 months in my new county and I fi...	texasgal	6	549	Jun 13, 2015 by Iamhere
«First < 1 … 176 177 178 179 180 … 822 > Last» \| Page of 822 sorted by

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.