Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

mvg · mvg

HI guys, this is my first time posting. I'm a little nervous, not sure what to expect here. I've been married to my AH for 13 years. He has been physically abusive a couple of times, that forced me to call the cops on him.. We have two young kids under 10. My AH doesn't get violent often but he is intimidating...

Yankeerose · Yankeerose

I would like to order an Alanon book from Amazon. What do you suggest as a first book? There are so many and I'm trying to read all the reviews for them and most are pretty good. I live with a recovering alcoholic husband. I have trouble with martyrdom, high expectations, laying blame, being unable to fo...

carewithann · carewithann

Hello, I am new here, I attended Al anon meetings last year but they really upset me. It was a group of older women that had either lost their husbands to alcoholism or had ended up leaving them. It scared me to death about the future with my husband who still drinks heavily on a daily basis, as that is what...

EarlyBird · EarlyBird

I know that my AH has to deal with his court issues on his own since they are not my problems, but I can't help but worry because they outcome may very well be my problem. He is facing public intoxication charges in addition to three counts of child endangerment, which will definitely have fines we cann...

Debb · Debb

STEPS . Solutions. To. Every. Problem.If we have Al-anon, there is no need to stand in our own light and try to solve our problems in darkness. The ways and means that Al-anon offers have lighted the way for so many thousands of despairing people that no one can question their power. When I am faced w...

Helpangel · Helpangel

Good morning everyone! I was at a neighborhood party and just had a thought while I'm talking to this guy--wow my husband would have really liked him--wow I really like this couple-- can't wait to hang out with them again. Oh wait-- I'm separated and no one in my neighborhood knows--oh wait I'll never g...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's One Day at a Time in AlAnon (ODAT) holds a good reminder of what works most effectively to reduce the pain that we may feel from someone's drinking. Most who come to AlAnon have a long list of painful experiences that we have tried, unsuccessfully, to address on our own. The page notes that the ab...

Lyne · Lyne

Hi all-My 92 year old mom was placed in a nursing home while her companion, 72, was in the hospital trying to have his foot saved. He is a rageful, diabetic, active alcoholic, and we could not tell him what was happening with my mom or we would have needed police intervention. Once we got my mom settled, my...

Iamhere · Iamhere

The Courage to Change reading for today is all about character defects, and the role they play for us. Before program, many of us used them to survive - such as denial or secrecy. Once we find and begin to work the Al-Anon program, these same two defects that served us well often become liabilities as t...

Enuff · Enuff

Hello Everyone, I'm a tired Newbie here, Oh where to start & as the topic suggests I will spare the intricate details. I'm 51 y/o and have been dealing with my alcoholic older sister for far too long, I would have taken a bullet for her even through all the abuse but I'm simply at the end of my tether. Th...

Debb · Debb

NUTS . Not. Using. The. Steps.When I read a step and think about it deeply, I find it opens the door to new insights. When I read that same step again, it reveals new spiritual ideas. They seem to dig into our consciousness and unearth for us the wonderful potential for good in all our relationships w...

hiraeth · hiraeth

Do you guys know how to function in a normal life? Did anyone learn it in adulthood? It seems so boring. But I don't want the alternative either. For me, I was built and developed around high-octane activities and situations. Now my life is very peaceful. But I don't know how to function in the mundane. I...

oceanpine · oceanpine

good morning, or whatever time of day it is in your corner of the world, I left my home six weeks ago. I am finally moved into my own place and ready for my children to start splitting their time between here and our family home, where my AH is stubbornly residing. School starts tomorrow, and our counselo...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Today's reading is about how both shame and guilt can keep us trapped in unhealthy behaviors and are in direct contrast to our values. The reading speaks about how both steps four and five are so valuable in helping us to see that we can look at our whole selves, including traits o...

Living508 · Living508

What things do you find helpful (sayings, slogans, thoughts, activities, etc) for staying in the moment? I still get very intense moments of anxiety where I do the "what ifs" and freak out...I can often bring myself to stay in the moment but at times I still have trouble doing so. Thanks in a...

scootypuffjunior · scootypuffjunior

I'm going to try to keep this as short and concise as possible. My Dad's ex wife, and the mother to my teenage sister, is dying from complications of her alcohol abuse. Her liver is officially destroyed, her other organs are failing and she is in a coma and on a ventilator. Today they discovered inte...

hiraeth · hiraeth

Hi everyone, I'm new here and new to Al-anon. Where I live there is an Al-anon meeting once a month so I will attend my first one in September. This evening I met with a lady from Al-anon and she gifted me with the little book 'Hope For Today'. I'm very grateful for that and it feels like a wink from God that it...

PaulF · PaulF

So my alcoholic 'friend' the woman who says she loves me is now 12 days sober. I am pleased. Where it becomes painful is she appears to have got back with her abusive ex whom she spent a great deal of time telling me was a psychopath, a control freak and an all round nasty peice of work. I feel used. I let mysel...

John · John

Hello Family and Friends! Not real sure where I am going with this, but I'll start by saying first that I miss just hanging out here and posting and replying to the post of others. This time of year gets very busy and somewhat crazy for me business wise, but I am grateful to have the business. My A son and I w...

Flower49 · Flower49

Hi everyone, today I am really kicking myself in the butt! Somehow, someway I apparently had a debt to a company that I guess I forgot about, which is strange, this company took collection action and went to court and got a judgement and today the first email of the day at my work was from payroll showing a...

Kool-Aid Kid · Kool-Aid Kid

Has anyone had the experience of attending meetings, either long or short term, where it is obvious the meeting is run by and mostly for long-time members and/or the very people who began a particular meeting? Where a Group Conscience has become a farce where only a few are allowed any significant inp...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I had another talk with my Mom after I left Illinois and I'm grateful I waited .. God love the woman, she does her best. She's doing better and accepting that moving to California is not the right move for me. Things here are moving quickly however not in the direction I had hoped .. you know what that is w...

Debb · Debb

THINK .. Thoughtful. Honest. Intelligent. Necessary. Kind.Quiet your mind before you speak, therefore averting impatience and hostility, which as we all know only fuels and perpetuates the chaos, no matter where, when, why or who the chaos surrounds. When we THINK before we speak, pati...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

One of my very best friends in the world has dealt with a lot over the last 5 years and has always been a rock for me. She listened even when she thought I was off my rocker .. lol .. I will love her forever because of just that. Probably because of that she's one of the few people who if they call me at any hour I...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

There is a lady who takes me to my thursday face to face meeting. we have become very close and i respect her alot. She praised me thursday on the way home. She said that i have grown alot in a yaear and a half. It also reflects when i lead the meeting and share. She felt last nite's stint as a leader went partic...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for August 16 speaks about living healthy, eating and resting in the midst of a crisis. It points out that many times we skip meals forget to rest or relax until we are exhausted and simply ignore our basic needs.The reading suggests that during times of difficulty that is when we sho...

Yankeerose · Yankeerose

So we are almost at closing time on our house sale. We've hit some snags along the way but I'm hoping things go smoothly from here on out and I can breath a little easier in our new condo. The reason we had to sell our house is because we couldnt afford it any longer. Always about $500 - $800 short every month e...

missmeliss · missmeliss

I'm feeling an interesting lot of "meh". Abf has been on the up and up for months now, doing a course, walking the walk and basically doing and being everything "right". And it's been nice to see. I've started to receive his calls and occasional visits with far less dread and way m...

lucymae · lucymae

What a terrible disease this is. It's so cunning, baffeling and powerful for us Alanon's too. I went for a period of time thinking I had a normal relationship with my husband. What a fool I was. I'm back to square one. I now have to remind myself I'm dealing with a very sick person that is not getting any hel...

pixie · pixie

My beer guzzling alcoholic husband told me he's gaining weight. Personally I can't see it except his stomach. I think he's lost weight everywhere else. So out of curiosity I looked up cirrhosis of the liver. He has the symptoms that I didn't know about. Bruising, bleeds easy from a tiny cut or scratch....

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for all this 15th speaks about the difficulties of living with the disease of alcoholism. It points out that because of the uncertainty caused by the disease, many of us are hard pressed to be able to determine the difference between a minor inconvenience and a major crisis. That is wh...

Helpangel · Helpangel

Does anyone have the feeling that when you try and be social and make friends that something isn't right? It feels like I put off this vibe of insecurity and say the wrong thing a lot. How long after breaking things off with an alcoholic do u feel normal is their a "normal" class I can take?? The...

Skorpi · Skorpi

The moons must be aligned just so today... Seems that many people I work with are UPSET about something today. REALLY UPSET. And upset about policies and procedures that just are the way they are, and must be followed for good reason. Seems that folks are determined to be very upset, regardless of any...

CoopsMom · CoopsMom

My goal is to stop looking for praise, reassurance, compassion, love and support from someone who is incapable of giving it. I have to learn to accept that he CAN'T do it, it's not that he doesn't want to, or I don't deserve it...he just can't. My love for myself and the love of other family and friends is p...

beGraceful · beGraceful

I just found out today that my family shunned me around 7 years or more ago telling others I am (or was) in jail for being a heroin addict. I know it sounds insane but my question is this...how do I shrug this off and get past it? I have no contact with any of them and apparently this is why. I have wondered for y...

RealitySucker · RealitySucker

Ha. I feel as if I could write a million posts with a million different questions but right now I need to vent and figure out how to best handle the immediate situation. AH has to attend a court-mandated class this weekend as a result of his DUI. It is a weekend-long course and it's 2.5 hours away from wher...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

well..my feelings of desperation have lessened greatly. ah's dad is helping with our bills and ah is sober..this minute.. Im not fooling myself. i know that this situation is still looming every day. I dont want to base my decesions on whether ah drinks or not. I still have to face myself. Thursdays ar...

lucymae · lucymae

I've been in Alanon for about 12 years now. I thought I had this whole thing figured out. I feel so lost, confused and empty. My husband doesn't drink anymore and quit due to a heart condition. He is still undiagnosed. I allowed myself to get sucked in feeling sorry and worried for him. I was oh such a good c...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for August 14 speaks about having choices. It suggests that before reacting to a situation that we can look into our hearts, review what choices we have and see what we need to do although we may not like the choices that we find we, do have choices and we can choose to. act responsibly.T...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Pray for me I can barely see at all. I am struggling w/ a cataract. It seems that it is blinding me. I hope that soon I can tell you all that I can read again as clear as day. I am frustrated to say the least. I want my vision back! It has been just over 2 years since I got a refractive lens exchange now I have a cata...

Shelby · Shelby

How to find the strength to move on after being married for 27 yrs going through verbal abuse?

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

All I can say is WOW on the meetings out here there is black belt Alanon everywhere it is wonderful. I love it. It's still be a little frustrating and so asking for prayers regarding work I haven't had anyone respond to anything yet so I think I need to change up my resume. I still have some options and I'...

hotrod · hotrod

Since I posted the C2C reading for today incorrectly yesterday, I am going to share on the ODAT reading for today It is an interesting reflection on a topic close to m heart. The reading suggests that many of us waste time and energy rehashing old wounds and dwelling on the past and that by doing this,...

Lost and scared · Lost and scared

I don't know why this is happening. All day I've been planning on going to my second f2f. I'm an hour and a half away from leaving and my head is telling me why bother? He's gone and most likely will never return. You can go back to your strong self confident self now. Yet I believe that working the steps wi...

Elzbieta · Elzbieta

divorce I sign divorce papers after 38 years of marriage. All those years of my husband drinking and me being responsibility for everything I am on the point of being just myself. It is no easy but I am working my steps and using slogans to live and let live.

Jozie · Jozie

As Most know I have One Son, Now 18 :/ and on his Way to College this Weekend... I'm on such a Roller Coaster of Emotions that I think at times I'm Loosing my Mind.. I've Got really well at Hiding it from my Son, because I know he don't like to see mom cry and I don't want him to have any Ill Feeling about leaving...

EarlyBird · EarlyBird

Background: 3 children, ages 12/9/2. 9 year old battles bipolar. I am the sole breadwinner. AH has been working the program since May after an arrest for public intoxication while caring for tthe kids. He used to be loving and fun in addition to calm and stern with the kids, even our 9 year old who can ge...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

So I went to my first meeting here in town the other day and boy did I have a good laugh at myself. I should add I had a good laugh with the God of my understanding. I was very proud of myself I was early 7AM meeting and as I watch the meeting fill I think to myself .. hmm .. there sure are a lot of men at this meetin...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi all i know most of you do not live in England but just wanted to post on here that there is an AA convention with al anon participation in Liverpool England this Sunday. its at the Adelphi hotel liverpool city centre registration 9.30 am first al anon netting 10.30 if anyone fancys a visit to liverpoo...

Lost and scared · Lost and scared

I feel a bit bad writing this. Some of you know my story already. Broke up a week and a half ago with my recovering A. It was the first time that I was angry and I mean ANGRY. He has a history of leaving (3times in the first year). I told him the last time that if he were to do it again not to come back. That was over a...

hotrod · hotrod

Hi again everyone, I just realized today's August 12 and not August 13. As a result of that mistake I posted an incorrect Courage to Change reading today. I am sorry for the confusion and here is a brief explanation of today's readingThe C2C reading for August 12 speaks about the third step and act...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for Thirsday, August 13 speaks about our habit of placing people on a pedestal--especially our sponsor. The reading explains that the answers that we receive from each others, including our sponsors are merely the experience, strength and hope of the person who has worked the p...

CoMom2010 · CoMom2010

Hello, here are my stats and thoughts tonight: learned Daughter (29) had alcohol problem 5 years ago during her Destination Wedding. they split 1 year later, she's full blown Alchie now, DUI, interlock, job losses during peak binges. i have had her live with me on & off to "regroup" .....

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone! Today's reading is about the realization that Alanon brings- 'we are not alone'. The first time someone offered that phrase to me it felt like a warm blanket on a cold day. Living with alcoholism-- as a child in an alcoholic home, and an adult in an alcoholic marriage was so is...

Theoceancalls · Theoceancalls

So im not sure if what about to post belongs here or not but im needing some encouragement and needed to turn somewhere. Fir the first time in a long time ive made decisions in my life fir me. . And yet im feeling worse than ever. Let me re cap, i finally left a job that although afforded me a fabulous schedule...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page in One Day at a Time in AlAnon asks some questions that serve as an effective reset when I find myself struggling with negative thoughts and feelings. The AlAnon program is not a magic pill that miraculously and permanently removes our troubled thoughts. The page notes that even when we'...

iceland333 · iceland333

I'm a deeply insecure person, with severe self-esteem issues. I have social anxiety and phobia and I've developed very codependent behavior throughout the years. So I'm basically a mess. There's a long, painful history that has pushed me onto this path, but I accept and realize that I'm ultimate...

runningwife · runningwife

Every, and I mean every, fight we have, it ends up being my fault. The fact he showed up at my company picnic and created a scene was fault. He is sad because it's my fault. I won't have sex with him and that's my fault. I'm creating attitudes in our children against him and that is my fault. Is it? Is there a ch...

glad · glad

Well dear friends first let me say hello! I've been away from this board for about 6 weeks or so. In way of excuse, I have been really messed up so much so that I couldn't even really come here to describe. being an alonon is not just about when we live with alcoholics I'm a true people pleaser to the point th...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Ha! Not sure what's going on with the whole cosmic order of things but it really seems that my HP has decided it's time to clear up all of the "stuff" surrounding my ex husband, one way or another. This Sunday daughter has a school event and so I am to take her to his house on friday night and then m...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	First time posting- (Preview) HI guys, this is my first time posting. I'm a little nervous, not sure what to expect here. I've been married to my AH for 13 years. He has been physically abusive a couple of times, that forced me to call the cops on him.. We have two young kids under 10. My AH doesn't get violent often but he is intimidating...	mvg	13	632	Aug 19, 2015 by Jacq
	Alanon books (Preview) I would like to order an Alanon book from Amazon. What do you suggest as a first book? There are so many and I'm trying to read all the reviews for them and most are pretty good. I live with a recovering alcoholic husband. I have trouble with martyrdom, high expectations, laying blame, being unable to fo...	Yankeerose	9	1512	Aug 19, 2015 by Jerry F
	How to get past the guilt and focus on myself instead of him (Preview) Hello, I am new here, I attended Al anon meetings last year but they really upset me. It was a group of older women that had either lost their husbands to alcoholism or had ended up leaving them. It scared me to death about the future with my husband who still drinks heavily on a daily basis, as that is what...	carewithann	16	797	Aug 19, 2015 by Bethany66
	Looming Court Date (Preview) I know that my AH has to deal with his court issues on his own since they are not my problems, but I can't help but worry because they outcome may very well be my problem. He is facing public intoxication charges in addition to three counts of child endangerment, which will definitely have fines we cann...	EarlyBird	8	650	Aug 19, 2015 by Dave2554
	Al-Anon Acronym For 8/19/15 ... STEPS (Preview) STEPS . Solutions. To. Every. Problem.If we have Al-anon, there is no need to stand in our own light and try to solve our problems in darkness. The ways and means that Al-anon offers have lighted the way for so many thousands of despairing people that no one can question their power. When I am faced w...	Debb	1	485	Aug 19, 2015 by Iamhere
	The life we all miss (Preview) Good morning everyone! I was at a neighborhood party and just had a thought while I'm talking to this guy--wow my husband would have really liked him--wow I really like this couple-- can't wait to hang out with them again. Oh wait-- I'm separated and no one in my neighborhood knows--oh wait I'll never g...	Helpangel	13	797	Aug 19, 2015 by Helpangel
	ODAT 8/18 - Why Polishing Our Halo Is a Bad Idea (Preview) Today's One Day at a Time in AlAnon (ODAT) holds a good reminder of what works most effectively to reduce the pain that we may feel from someone's drinking. Most who come to AlAnon have a long list of painful experiences that we have tried, unsuccessfully, to address on our own. The page notes that the ab...	Enigmatic	6	709	Aug 19, 2015 by carewithann
	compassion for an alcoholic (Preview) Hi all-My 92 year old mom was placed in a nursing home while her companion, 72, was in the hospital trying to have his foot saved. He is a rageful, diabetic, active alcoholic, and we could not tell him what was happening with my mom or we would have needed police intervention. Once we got my mom settled, my...	Lyne	4	741	Aug 18, 2015 by carewithann
	Courage to Change 8/17 (C2C) (Preview) The Courage to Change reading for today is all about character defects, and the role they play for us. Before program, many of us used them to survive - such as denial or secrecy. Once we find and begin to work the Al-Anon program, these same two defects that served us well often become liabilities as t...	Iamhere	3	389	Aug 18, 2015 by Debb
	It's a long story but I'll spare you most details. (Preview) Hello Everyone, I'm a tired Newbie here, Oh where to start & as the topic suggests I will spare the intricate details. I'm 51 y/o and have been dealing with my alcoholic older sister for far too long, I would have taken a bullet for her even through all the abuse but I'm simply at the end of my tether. Th...	Enuff	14	636	Aug 18, 2015 by Debb
	Al-Anon Acronym For 8/18/15 ... N.U.T.S. (Preview) NUTS . Not. Using. The. Steps.When I read a step and think about it deeply, I find it opens the door to new insights. When I read that same step again, it reveals new spiritual ideas. They seem to dig into our consciousness and unearth for us the wonderful potential for good in all our relationships w...	Debb	6	2233	Aug 18, 2015 by Iamhere
	don't know how to be normal (Preview) Do you guys know how to function in a normal life? Did anyone learn it in adulthood? It seems so boring. But I don't want the alternative either. For me, I was built and developed around high-octane activities and situations. Now my life is very peaceful. But I don't know how to function in the mundane. I...	hiraeth	7	515	Aug 18, 2015 by Iamhere
	minding my own business but supporting recovery for the A? (Preview) good morning, or whatever time of day it is in your corner of the world, I left my home six weeks ago. I am finally moved into my own place and ready for my children to start splitting their time between here and our family home, where my AH is stubbornly residing. School starts tomorrow, and our counselo...	oceanpine	4	787	Aug 18, 2015 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today August 18 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Today's reading is about how both shame and guilt can keep us trapped in unhealthy behaviors and are in direct contrast to our values. The reading speaks about how both steps four and five are so valuable in helping us to see that we can look at our whole selves, including traits o...	yanksfan51	2	494	Aug 18, 2015 by Iamhere
	Need some help with staying in the moment.... (Preview) What things do you find helpful (sayings, slogans, thoughts, activities, etc) for staying in the moment? I still get very intense moments of anxiety where I do the "what ifs" and freak out...I can often bring myself to stay in the moment but at times I still have trouble doing so. Thanks in a...	Living508	9	587	Aug 18, 2015 by hopefortoday29
	Death is imminent. I need help learning to forigve death dying liver failure forgive forgiveness (Preview) I'm going to try to keep this as short and concise as possible. My Dad's ex wife, and the mother to my teenage sister, is dying from complications of her alcohol abuse. Her liver is officially destroyed, her other organs are failing and she is in a coma and on a ventilator. Today they discovered inte...	scootypuffjunior	38	11173	Aug 17, 2015 by hiraeth
	So, how's it all done? (Preview) Hi everyone, I'm new here and new to Al-anon. Where I live there is an Al-anon meeting once a month so I will attend my first one in September. This evening I met with a lady from Al-anon and she gifted me with the little book 'Hope For Today'. I'm very grateful for that and it feels like a wink from God that it...	hiraeth	6	465	Aug 17, 2015 by hiraeth
	Apologies for ranting........ (Preview) So my alcoholic 'friend' the woman who says she loves me is now 12 days sober. I am pleased. Where it becomes painful is she appears to have got back with her abusive ex whom she spent a great deal of time telling me was a psychopath, a control freak and an all round nasty peice of work. I feel used. I let mysel...	PaulF	36	798	Aug 17, 2015 by Iamhere
	Life on Lifes Terms (Preview) Hello Family and Friends! Not real sure where I am going with this, but I'll start by saying first that I miss just hanging out here and posting and replying to the post of others. This time of year gets very busy and somewhat crazy for me business wise, but I am grateful to have the business. My A son and I w...	John	3	408	Aug 17, 2015 by Jerry F
	Slogans, Readings, Boards, Meetings (Preview) Hi everyone, today I am really kicking myself in the butt! Somehow, someway I apparently had a debt to a company that I guess I forgot about, which is strange, this company took collection action and went to court and got a judgement and today the first email of the day at my work was from payroll showing a...	Flower49	4	559	Aug 17, 2015 by Iamhere
	Meetings Gone Wrong (Preview) Has anyone had the experience of attending meetings, either long or short term, where it is obvious the meeting is run by and mostly for long-time members and/or the very people who began a particular meeting? Where a Group Conscience has become a farce where only a few are allowed any significant inp...	Kool-Aid Kid	10	1997	Aug 17, 2015 by Flower49
	Very Quick Update .. (Preview) I had another talk with my Mom after I left Illinois and I'm grateful I waited .. God love the woman, she does her best. She's doing better and accepting that moving to California is not the right move for me. Things here are moving quickly however not in the direction I had hoped .. you know what that is w...	SerenityRUS	9	605	Aug 17, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	SLOGAN for 8/17/15 - THINK (Preview) THINK .. Thoughtful. Honest. Intelligent. Necessary. Kind.Quiet your mind before you speak, therefore averting impatience and hostility, which as we all know only fuels and perpetuates the chaos, no matter where, when, why or who the chaos surrounds. When we THINK before we speak, pati...	Debb	5	644	Aug 17, 2015 by hiraeth
	Very good friend (Prayers Please) (Preview) One of my very best friends in the world has dealt with a lot over the last 5 years and has always been a rock for me. She listened even when she thought I was off my rocker .. lol .. I will love her forever because of just that. Probably because of that she's one of the few people who if they call me at any hour I...	SerenityRUS	9	645	Aug 17, 2015 by milkwood
	ALA-NON BUDDY PRAISES ME (Preview) There is a lady who takes me to my thursday face to face meeting. we have become very close and i respect her alot. She praised me thursday on the way home. She said that i have grown alot in a yaear and a half. It also reflects when i lead the meeting and share. She felt last nite's stint as a leader went partic...	YARNCRAZY	4	619	Aug 16, 2015 by Iamhere
	C2C 8-16 (Preview) The C2C reading for August 16 speaks about living healthy, eating and resting in the midst of a crisis. It points out that many times we skip meals forget to rest or relax until we are exhausted and simply ignore our basic needs.The reading suggests that during times of difficulty that is when we sho...	hotrod	5	371	Aug 16, 2015 by Yankeerose
	Resentment and bitterness (Preview) So we are almost at closing time on our house sale. We've hit some snags along the way but I'm hoping things go smoothly from here on out and I can breath a little easier in our new condo. The reason we had to sell our house is because we couldnt afford it any longer. Always about $500 - $800 short every month e...	Yankeerose	33	1062	Aug 16, 2015 by Yankeerose
	Yay for detachment. (Preview) I'm feeling an interesting lot of "meh". Abf has been on the up and up for months now, doing a course, walking the walk and basically doing and being everything "right". And it's been nice to see. I've started to receive his calls and occasional visits with far less dread and way m...	missmeliss	7	567	Aug 16, 2015 by Iamhere
	I've been fooled and baffled once again by this disease. (Preview) What a terrible disease this is. It's so cunning, baffeling and powerful for us Alanon's too. I went for a period of time thinking I had a normal relationship with my husband. What a fool I was. I'm back to square one. I now have to remind myself I'm dealing with a very sick person that is not getting any hel...	lucymae	13	709	Aug 16, 2015 by maryjane
	cirrhosis? (Preview) My beer guzzling alcoholic husband told me he's gaining weight. Personally I can't see it except his stomach. I think he's lost weight everywhere else. So out of curiosity I looked up cirrhosis of the liver. He has the symptoms that I didn't know about. Bruising, bleeds easy from a tiny cut or scratch....	pixie	7	932	Aug 15, 2015 by pixie
	C2C 8-15 (Preview) The C2C reading for all this 15th speaks about the difficulties of living with the disease of alcoholism. It points out that because of the uncertainty caused by the disease, many of us are hard pressed to be able to determine the difference between a minor inconvenience and a major crisis. That is wh...	hotrod	3	465	Aug 15, 2015 by Debb
	Don't even know what is normal anymore (Preview) Does anyone have the feeling that when you try and be social and make friends that something isn't right? It feels like I put off this vibe of insecurity and say the wrong thing a lot. How long after breaking things off with an alcoholic do u feel normal is their a "normal" class I can take?? The...	Helpangel	10	680	Aug 15, 2015 by Debb
	So much is about Perception... (Preview) The moons must be aligned just so today... Seems that many people I work with are UPSET about something today. REALLY UPSET. And upset about policies and procedures that just are the way they are, and must be followed for good reason. Seems that folks are determined to be very upset, regardless of any...	Skorpi	13	1007	Aug 15, 2015 by Debb
	Time to set a goal to keep from feeling disappointed. (Preview) My goal is to stop looking for praise, reassurance, compassion, love and support from someone who is incapable of giving it. I have to learn to accept that he CAN'T do it, it's not that he doesn't want to, or I don't deserve it...he just can't. My love for myself and the love of other family and friends is p...	CoopsMom	4	609	Aug 15, 2015 by Debb
	Shunned By Family (Preview) I just found out today that my family shunned me around 7 years or more ago telling others I am (or was) in jail for being a heroin addict. I know it sounds insane but my question is this...how do I shrug this off and get past it? I have no contact with any of them and apparently this is why. I have wondered for y...	beGraceful	5	657	Aug 15, 2015 by beGraceful
	Loving an alcoholic is becoming really inconvenient! (Preview) Ha. I feel as if I could write a million posts with a million different questions but right now I need to vent and figure out how to best handle the immediate situation. AH has to attend a court-mandated class this weekend as a result of his DUI. It is a weekend-long course and it's 2.5 hours away from wher...	RealitySucker	10	533	Aug 14, 2015 by Iamhere
	this too will pass (Preview) well..my feelings of desperation have lessened greatly. ah's dad is helping with our bills and ah is sober..this minute.. Im not fooling myself. i know that this situation is still looming every day. I dont want to base my decesions on whether ah drinks or not. I still have to face myself. Thursdays ar...	YARNCRAZY	4	394	Aug 14, 2015 by Iamhere
	So confused and sad. (Preview) I've been in Alanon for about 12 years now. I thought I had this whole thing figured out. I feel so lost, confused and empty. My husband doesn't drink anymore and quit due to a heart condition. He is still undiagnosed. I allowed myself to get sucked in feeling sorry and worried for him. I was oh such a good c...	lucymae	4	534	Aug 14, 2015 by Iamhere
	C2C 8-14 (Preview) The C2C reading for August 14 speaks about having choices. It suggests that before reacting to a situation that we can look into our hearts, review what choices we have and see what we need to do although we may not like the choices that we find we, do have choices and we can choose to. act responsibly.T...	hotrod	2	430	Aug 14, 2015 by Iamhere
	this will be quick...I can't see (Preview) Pray for me I can barely see at all. I am struggling w/ a cataract. It seems that it is blinding me. I hope that soon I can tell you all that I can read again as clear as day. I am frustrated to say the least. I want my vision back! It has been just over 2 years since I got a refractive lens exchange now I have a cata...	Hoot Nanny	6	530	Aug 14, 2015 by Debb
	Strength to move on (Preview) How to find the strength to move on after being married for 27 yrs going through verbal abuse?	Shelby	20	701	Aug 14, 2015 by Shelby
	Meetings .. (Preview) All I can say is WOW on the meetings out here there is black belt Alanon everywhere it is wonderful. I love it. It's still be a little frustrating and so asking for prayers regarding work I haven't had anyone respond to anything yet so I think I need to change up my resume. I still have some options and I'...	SerenityRUS	3	452	Aug 14, 2015 by Iamhere
	ODAT 8-13 (Preview) Since I posted the C2C reading for today incorrectly yesterday, I am going to share on the ODAT reading for today It is an interesting reflection on a topic close to m heart. The reading suggests that many of us waste time and energy rehashing old wounds and dwelling on the past and that by doing this,...	hotrod	4	542	Aug 14, 2015 by The1975jen
	Need some encouragement (Preview) I don't know why this is happening. All day I've been planning on going to my second f2f. I'm an hour and a half away from leaving and my head is telling me why bother? He's gone and most likely will never return. You can go back to your strong self confident self now. Yet I believe that working the steps wi...	Lost and scared	22	712	Aug 14, 2015 by Jerry F
	divorce (Preview) divorce I sign divorce papers after 38 years of marriage. All those years of my husband drinking and me being responsibility for everything I am on the point of being just myself. It is no easy but I am working my steps and using slogans to live and let live.	Elzbieta	16	1107	Aug 14, 2015 by The1975jen
	Emotional Overload... (Preview) As Most know I have One Son, Now 18 :/ and on his Way to College this Weekend... I'm on such a Roller Coaster of Emotions that I think at times I'm Loosing my Mind.. I've Got really well at Hiding it from my Son, because I know he don't like to see mom cry and I don't want him to have any Ill Feeling about leaving...	Jozie	7	695	Aug 13, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	Was alcohol to blame for his good parenting? sigh (Preview) Background: 3 children, ages 12/9/2. 9 year old battles bipolar. I am the sole breadwinner. AH has been working the program since May after an arrest for public intoxication while caring for tthe kids. He used to be loving and fun in addition to calm and stern with the kids, even our 9 year old who can ge...	EarlyBird	4	571	Aug 13, 2015 by Iamhere
	First meeting in new town!! (Preview) So I went to my first meeting here in town the other day and boy did I have a good laugh at myself. I should add I had a good laugh with the God of my understanding. I was very proud of myself I was early 7AM meeting and as I watch the meeting fill I think to myself .. hmm .. there sure are a lot of men at this meetin...	SerenityRUS	3	531	Aug 13, 2015 by Debb
	Convention (Preview) Hi all i know most of you do not live in England but just wanted to post on here that there is an AA convention with al anon participation in Liverpool England this Sunday. its at the Adelphi hotel liverpool city centre registration 9.30 am first al anon netting 10.30 if anyone fancys a visit to liverpoo...	Tracy	0	272	Aug 13, 2015 by Tracy
	Needy again (Preview) I feel a bit bad writing this. Some of you know my story already. Broke up a week and a half ago with my recovering A. It was the first time that I was angry and I mean ANGRY. He has a history of leaving (3times in the first year). I told him the last time that if he were to do it again not to come back. That was over a...	Lost and scared	5	570	Aug 12, 2015 by Iamhere
	C2C Reading 8-12 (Preview) Hi again everyone, I just realized today's August 12 and not August 13. As a result of that mistake I posted an incorrect Courage to Change reading today. I am sorry for the confusion and here is a brief explanation of today's readingThe C2C reading for August 12 speaks about the third step and act...	hotrod	5	515	Aug 12, 2015 by gillygilly
	C2C 8-13 (Preview) The C2C reading for Thirsday, August 13 speaks about our habit of placing people on a pedestal--especially our sponsor. The reading explains that the answers that we receive from each others, including our sponsors are merely the experience, strength and hope of the person who has worked the p...	hotrod	2	503	Aug 12, 2015 by Iamhere
	New Member: Dealing with Alcoholic Daughter (Preview) Hello, here are my stats and thoughts tonight: learned Daughter (29) had alcohol problem 5 years ago during her Destination Wedding. they split 1 year later, she's full blown Alchie now, DUI, interlock, job losses during peak binges. i have had her live with me on & off to "regroup" .....	CoMom2010	12	688	Aug 12, 2015 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today Aug 11 (Preview) Good morning everyone! Today's reading is about the realization that Alanon brings- 'we are not alone'. The first time someone offered that phrase to me it felt like a warm blanket on a cold day. Living with alcoholism-- as a child in an alcoholic home, and an adult in an alcoholic marriage was so is...	yanksfan51	4	538	Aug 12, 2015 by stillsmilin321
	what happened to me? (Preview) So im not sure if what about to post belongs here or not but im needing some encouragement and needed to turn somewhere. Fir the first time in a long time ive made decisions in my life fir me. . And yet im feeling worse than ever. Let me re cap, i finally left a job that although afforded me a fabulous schedule...	Theoceancalls	8	646	Aug 11, 2015 by Theoceancalls
	ODAT 8/11 - What Are We Doing About It? (Preview) Today's page in One Day at a Time in AlAnon asks some questions that serve as an effective reset when I find myself struggling with negative thoughts and feelings. The AlAnon program is not a magic pill that miraculously and permanently removes our troubled thoughts. The page notes that even when we'...	Enigmatic	6	695	Aug 11, 2015 by hotrod
	I'm losing her, the love of my life (Preview) I'm a deeply insecure person, with severe self-esteem issues. I have social anxiety and phobia and I've developed very codependent behavior throughout the years. So I'm basically a mess. There's a long, painful history that has pushed me onto this path, but I accept and realize that I'm ultimate...	iceland333	9	775	Aug 11, 2015 by pinkchip
	Is it really my fault? (Preview) Every, and I mean every, fight we have, it ends up being my fault. The fact he showed up at my company picnic and created a scene was fault. He is sad because it's my fault. I won't have sex with him and that's my fault. I'm creating attitudes in our children against him and that is my fault. Is it? Is there a ch...	runningwife	16	780	Aug 11, 2015 by Doingmybest
	Hello Friends -long few weeks. (Preview) Well dear friends first let me say hello! I've been away from this board for about 6 weeks or so. In way of excuse, I have been really messed up so much so that I couldn't even really come here to describe. being an alonon is not just about when we live with alcoholics I'm a true people pleaser to the point th...	glad	7	423	Aug 11, 2015 by Jerry F
	Aha, this will be fun! (Preview) Ha! Not sure what's going on with the whole cosmic order of things but it really seems that my HP has decided it's time to clear up all of the "stuff" surrounding my ex husband, one way or another. This Sunday daughter has a school event and so I am to take her to his house on friday night and then m...	missmeliss	12	650	Aug 10, 2015 by LinSC
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.