Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Iamhere · Iamhere

Hey MIP Family - Today is my birthday! In my world, it's been a day that has been forgotten and not often celebrated since we became inflicted with the disease of addiction. I spoke earlier this week of my anxiety over 'it' as I am good at one day at a time most of the while but there are a few days/periods t...

glad · glad

My brother sister and MOM have shut me out since my Dad passed away on June 24 this year. If we do talk at all very cruel things have been said, threats have been made, crazy lies have been told and unfortunately believed by others. There have been lots of lies and for some reason most sad to me is the niece...

Helpangel · Helpangel

Hi everyone. I am refinancing my house to a lower interest rate and the mortgage is in my name only but the title is in both our names. Since we are separated should or shouldn't I go ahead and get my ah off the title of the house when I refinance? The mortgage processor said I can do it either way. My concern i...

Broken513 · Broken513

Well this is it, in 1 1/2 hours I will be attending my first f2f meeting.. thus far I have been doing these online meetings for a month. nervous? yes.. scared to death really...last night I laid out my clothes like a school girl going to a new school...excited but nervous at the same time. I just say to myse...

hotrod · hotrod

Step 5 has been posted to the Step Board Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t60892182/9-2015-alanon-step-5/Please join us a...

gillygilly · gillygilly

Today is one year, more or less to the minute, when I asked my partner to leave the house. I didn't know that I was going to say it the minute before I said it. I feel very strongly that my conscious mind wasn't involved at all. It had checked out. It was my body reacting and screaming for change. My consc...

tiiburbo · tiiburbo

Hello, I'm new to this site and support in general. I come from a very large family (I'm the youngest of 6 kids), almost all of whom are alcohol or drug-dependent. Other than my oldest brother who is 15 years older than me, I'm the only to not suffer from addiction, although I do (understandably...) have...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for September 19 speaks about Step Eight and making a list of all the people we have harmed. The reading notes, that it Is important to review what kind of harm we might do to others,before we can list the people we hurt. We can ask ourselves about situations in which each of our characte...

Debb · Debb

The slogan, Think helps us to remember to think before we act on or react to situations. This slogan helps us make good decisions about how to act. When we apply this slogan, it helps free us from distorted thinking and impulsive, potentially destructive decision-making.THINK .. Thoughtful. Ho...

Mich3lle · Mich3lle

Hello Everyone, I have only just come across Al-anon this last week when my mums key worker suggested I look into local meetings, which I am doing. I have been doing lots of reading recently and have come across lots of info regarding Adult Children of Alcoholics, their personality traits and how futu...

Helpangel · Helpangel

I have been reading some of the posts and I saw one about an anniversary that an ah started drinking again. I started thinking in the past 4 years that my ah and I have been together how many anniversaries, birthdays, Christmas, there was a feeling of not good in the air and I have to tell you all of them. My a...

SoggySlippers · SoggySlippers

Hello everyone. I am obviously new here,but not new to Alanon.I have been in recovery for nearly a year.I live in a very small town with only one f2f meeting available each week.I feel I need more than what I am receiving there,therefore I started searching online and ended up here. I hope I can find what...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi all I have not posted for a while but feel the, urge to share this with you all. I have been in recovery for a few years people have alwaystold me to use my phone reach out. I havealways been good at taking calls from others in programme especially New comers. And Idid use, my phone when in a, lot of pain. I...

Debb · Debb

The slogan, How Important Is It helps us to have perspective, to determine what is of most value to us personally, and to avoid being upset over things that are of minimal importance at the moment. It helps free us to appreciate the good things that life offers. WAIT: Why Am I TalkingTGIF!

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for September 18 speaks about how our growth in Al-Anon is all a process and that time will offer us evidence that the program works. We can see the growth in our lives when we take the time to reflect about where we were a 6 month to a year ago. The longer that we live by these principles...

Confused2379 · Confused2379

Hi, I have not posted in a long time. I read your post frequently. It gives me hope that I might get better. I think I've stepped off the deep end and I'm afraid I won't know how to come back. i have been crying over the breakup of my marriage and my AH drinking again. I was attending 3 or 4 alanon meetings...

Mirandac · Mirandac

I want to apologize to anyone i offended with my last post. i wish i never started it from the start. The subject matters Are things i struggle with, have nothing to do with any of You. You all have been a great help and support and have helped me to keep My sanity. thank you for your warmth and caring. I wil...

Rinn · Rinn

Here's my day: Found out I may have to move (not sure but good chance rental is being sold) Nursing program starts next week, bought my $2,000 text books, getting nervous. Then received an email they are changing the requirements (after accepting us) we now have a biology class also. Last day to regist...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I received roses & orchids from my church family today. My pastor & friend delivered them today. What joy fills my soul. & I am not a member yet. I consider them Friends. I am so grateful for thoughtful people. Just when you think you aren't important someone reminds you. Good thoughts ar...

mjferg · mjferg

I have been looking forward to my fall break from school for so long,it has been a tough and tiring semester.Now as I sit here,in the aftermath of the funeral I look around at the work I am behind on,laundry baskets running over,floors that need swept and mopped, and a host of other chores,I feel overw...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I have so much to be grateful for. And nothing to be ungrateful for. No one ever says that they are ungrateful. I find myself wondering if I can find something to share that would benefit others. Maybe I can plant a seed in someone's mind or heart. I know that all this time in the program has made me wiser. Th...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for September 17 speaks about "people pleasing " and how destructive this can become when we ignore our own needs and sacrifice ourselves and our well-being for the sake of others. The reading points out that it is important to get along with others an know how to work toge...

Debb · Debb

The slogan, Let It Begin With Me helps us to keep the focus on and be responsible for our own actions and behaviors. This slogan helps us to take action to change the things we can change and to take the responsibility to get our own needs met, rather than waiting for others to change or to meet our needs for...

Broken513 · Broken513

The good part: Well.... I did it...sort of..well I will be doing it......called a phone number that a friend gave me to a friend of hers that has been going to al anon meetings for years...she was very delightful to talk to......she said she would sit with me at the f2f Sat morning and even hold my hand if I...

mvg · mvg

hi guys..is there a way somehow to print or have a list of how many times I've logged in? I know it sounds silly but since I'm not able to attend f2f meetings yet..I'm starting here. .my case worker wants a "report" of my log ins. Just to make sure I am surfing this website..any help would be ap...

jml2012 · jml2012

My now ex partner is a recovering alcoholic (he may have relapsed now for all I know) In summary, we were together for around 11 years. The first 6 he was an active drinker (the drinking was always the excuse for his bad behavior), the last 5 he was sober (no excuse for his bad behavior). I thought if he coul...

Rinn · Rinn

It has been a while since I posted. More than a year actually. I have done a lot of work on 'ME' after leaving my addict ex-husband. Over the past few years I have really improved a lot. I got emotionally and financially back on my feet. I worked my butt off and was accepted into a Nursing program and hav...

annie-dresden · annie-dresden

Hi everyone This is the very first time I use al-anon in my life! I mean, not using al-anon, but getting in touch with you folks On my way in the last weeks I came to this al-anon site and when I ticked 18 of these 20 questions I knew I needed to get in touch, to do something after all. I am German, a free spritit,...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Still no job and trying not to go on meltdown mode, we are making due and doing ok. It's just kind of scary. It is what it is and I will get to where I need to be .. it's the flipping waiting that is driving me crazy. Some funny things that happened is having as much free time as I do I have to get out of the apart...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I have a little more information on the two situations that have been going on around me. My friends son is in rehab however not by his choice. So good news bad news kind of thing. My heart dropped when she told me exactly how bad things had really gotten. Maybe at least the seeds of recovery are startin...

mjferg · mjferg

Even in this darkness I am able to see God's mighty power at work.Finals are over and I have a long fall break before I go back to class.I have been concerned about having so much time on my hands after the funeral,I wasn't quite sure how I would cope.Well, yesterday a friend of mine called and said a tiny ki...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for September 16 speaks about "negative thoughts" and suggests that in the midst of a crisis these thoughts tell us the worst-case scenario and It is easy to think that they reflect the truth. The reading goes on to explain" feelings are not facts" and that...

Debb · Debb

Just For Today: The slogan, Just For Today tells us that things are more manageable when we deal with and live in the present. Things that seem way too difficult to manage long term may seem more manageable if we deal with them just for today. We can move forward in small steps rather than be overwhelmed b...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I can see & I am so amazed by it! I feel a sense of relief & now I don't have to wait any longer. Those who have been following my posts probably have noticed the frustration that I had been going through. I know that all of you were waiting for the results of my eye procedure. I am happy to say that all w...

mjferg · mjferg

My finals were yesterday,I gave my speech and my instructor said it was amazing,the best she had ever heard from a student!She gave me an A plus.I felt amazing, as if I had uncovered some secret desire that has been hidden in my heart.When I was a little girl I spent a lot of time in my room reading,writing...

Iamhere · Iamhere

song....https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tIZitK6_IMQ "...

Debb · Debb

First Things First: The slogan, First Things First helps us to set reasonable priorities and to keep a realistic perspective. This slogan helps us to make choices we are comfortable with, and to act with balance rather than react to crises. {{HUGS To Everyone}}

amf · amf

Hi! I have been in Al-Anon for a year and currently have a sponsor with whom I work the steps (on step 8). I attend two meetings a week. One is my home group and the other is an open AA meeting. I semi-regularly attend a "How Al-Anon works" book study. I hold a service position in my home group. Wh...

lgnutah · lgnutah

I come to this online message board to learn the alanon tools because all the meetings that are a reasonable driving distance for me are either listed as closed or are at night (I dont drive at night). There are lots of AA meetings that are open or in the daytime, but not alanon. Can I get a sponsor through...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good mothing everyone- Today's reading is about making amends. The writer notes that her most profound experience with making amends came from receiving amends from someone else in the fellowship. I have not had that particular experience, but I do remember as I was working the steps with my spon...

Paisley74 · Paisley74

My husband and I have been married for over 5 years. For at least the past 3 years I have suspected his is an alcoholic. I have confronted him more times than i can even count. He always denied, said I had the problem with his drinking not him, said everyone drinks, said he doesn't miss work because of drink...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

So I have been reminded that I am so not in control .. my car has been out of commission since last week. My girlfriend's husband who I just don't like and I think I figured it out .. there is part me and part he reminds me of my XAH. God has a wicked sense of humor .. lol .. the husband offered to fix my car for fr...

mjferg · mjferg

On top of everything else I have been going through I am in finals week at school.It is good for me though,I am glad I am busy.I will say the worse thing I can do is lay in my bed.My mind starts twisting things all around and has me feeling responsible for every tragic event that ever happened in my life.I tu...

deacon · deacon

Alcoholics make of their lives and, despite our attempts to detach, of others. My son is presently in another country far across the ocean and a couple of continents. His visa expired some time ago and he knows he is going to have to leave and come home. He met a girl when he was there, fell in love and now.....

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for September 14 speaks about the destructive habits that we develop having lived with the disease of alcoholism. It points out that because of many painful lessons and experiences, we tend to lose the ability to "Hope", sink into despair, shut down our feelings and ref...

Helpangel · Helpangel

After a painful weekend and thinking we are finally done bc of everything I wrote (boundary vs control) he said well I read it again today and now it's not that bad and that he is sorry we fought and he causes so many problems. Say what??? Why is it that when he ends it I hurt but I'm ok. Why can't I say I'm sorry...

ACoffman · ACoffman

Last week I found our three year old in my front yard unattended. My husband drove to daycare to pick her up, drunk, and left her in the yard when he got home. I pulled around the corner minutes after he came home thank god. I took his keys and wallet and called his mother to come get him. We are now separated....

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

My daughter and I had a funny/ironic discussion about codependency and how parts of us are pretty much groomed from an early age to people please, be the peace makers and so on, looking for that positive reinforcement that we are enough. Somewhere my thinking got distorted that I wasn't enough and lo...

saalbema · saalbema

My husband was involved in a drinking and driving accident a little over a month ago. Thankfully he did not hit someone else and was not seriously injured. Through an intervention we were able to convince him to go for treatment. He was admitted into a detox facility for only 2 days because his sympt...

confused2015 · confused2015

My AH, who hasn't drank in 1 week is driving me crazy. I am angry with him because of all that has been done to our relationship. He wants to act like nothing is wrong, I am having a tough time with this. He sends me cute, (dumb), little texts and I don't know how to reply because, in all reality, I don't car...

Debb · Debb

Easy Does It: The slogan, Easy Does It helps us remember that trying to force solutions often does not work. We may not be able to solve every problem in the time frame we wish to solve it in. Some problems may not be for us to solve. Sometimes a gentler, more patient approach is more effective and less frus...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Tomorrow is the day of my eye procedure! I am excited & a bit overwhelmed. It is two days earlier than I originally thought. So less waiting time. I will be on here soon w the results. Thanks to everyone who thinks of me & prays for me. I love you all! Kathleen

Debb · Debb

Keep It Simple: The slogan, Keep It Simple helps to remind us that simple solutions are often the most effective ones. This slogan can help us look at what really is happening rather than what we imagine may happen, and to take a reasonable, step by step approach rather than act out of fear or panic. FEA...

Helpangel · Helpangel

Hi everyone. I have been reading a lot about codependency and I think I got a little feisty and after an argument with my ah (that is not living with us since July and having to learn my job from him) I sent him an email saying what my boundaries where when he came over. Which was when he comes over to help me wi...

Mirandac · Mirandac

I have a subject i struggle with at my home group alanon vs friends. I keep finding over and over in my home group after my mtg people do not trust my reality of life. I often find it very off putting. I am intelligent, with it and no fool. Maybe about my xah but otherwise a very grounded Person. I do not thi...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for September 12 speaks about the concept of awareness and acceptance. It points out that often we become aware of a problem and once we obtain that awareness , it must be followed by a period known as "acceptance ", before we can actually take an effective action. This is wh...

Nchc · Nchc

For a week and a half my wife and I got separated. We have been together for 4 years, well, 4 years tomorrow. We weren't having a healthy relationship, we never got physical but mental abusive and controlling. She was the one who took the decision. During the first two days I was in completely chaos becau...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's reading in One Day at a Time in AlAnon (ODAT) is particularly helpful to me in my recovery. Before I came to AlAnon, I didn't realize that my tendency to advise others was a symptom of me trying to control what I could not, nor should not. AlAnon helped me realize that telling others what they shou...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for September 13 speaks about living one day at a time so as to make every day an important day. Each day we can try to improve our relationship with HP,the people in our lives, and ourselves by using the 12 steps, prayer mediation and alanon principles to help us pursue this goal. ...

Debb · Debb

But For The Grace Of God: The slogan, But For The Grace Of God helps to remind us to be compassionate with others, including the alcoholics in our lives. This slogan can help us avoid impatience, criticism, resentment, and vengefulness, which does harm to ourselves as well as to others. THINK .. Th...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Today's my Birthday - I'm throwing my own Party HERE! (Preview) Hey MIP Family - Today is my birthday! In my world, it's been a day that has been forgotten and not often celebrated since we became inflicted with the disease of addiction. I spoke earlier this week of my anxiety over 'it' as I am good at one day at a time most of the while but there are a few days/periods t...	Iamhere	14	834	Sep 20, 2015 by Iamhere
	horse of a different color in a different race (Preview) My brother sister and MOM have shut me out since my Dad passed away on June 24 this year. If we do talk at all very cruel things have been said, threats have been made, crazy lies have been told and unfortunately believed by others. There have been lots of lies and for some reason most sad to me is the niece...	glad	5	535	Sep 19, 2015 by a4l
	Legal question about house and quit claim (Preview) Hi everyone. I am refinancing my house to a lower interest rate and the mortgage is in my name only but the title is in both our names. Since we are separated should or shouldn't I go ahead and get my ah off the title of the house when I refinance? The mortgage processor said I can do it either way. My concern i...	Helpangel	9	625	Sep 19, 2015 by Helpangel
	Today is the day. TY all (Preview) Well this is it, in 1 1/2 hours I will be attending my first f2f meeting.. thus far I have been doing these online meetings for a month. nervous? yes.. scared to death really...last night I laid out my clothes like a school girl going to a new school...excited but nervous at the same time. I just say to myse...	Broken513	8	559	Sep 19, 2015 by Jen61
	Step 5 (Preview) Step 5 has been posted to the Step Board Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t60892182/9-2015-alanon-step-5/Please join us a...	hotrod	3	441	Sep 19, 2015 by Iamhere
	One year on (Preview) Today is one year, more or less to the minute, when I asked my partner to leave the house. I didn't know that I was going to say it the minute before I said it. I feel very strongly that my conscious mind wasn't involved at all. It had checked out. It was my body reacting and screaming for change. My consc...	gillygilly	8	592	Sep 19, 2015 by Jerry F
	New to Al-Anon family group (Preview) Hello, I'm new to this site and support in general. I come from a very large family (I'm the youngest of 6 kids), almost all of whom are alcohol or drug-dependent. Other than my oldest brother who is 15 years older than me, I'm the only to not suffer from addiction, although I do (understandably...) have...	tiiburbo	7	501	Sep 19, 2015 by hotrod
	C2C 9-19 (Preview) The C2C reading for September 19 speaks about Step Eight and making a list of all the people we have harmed. The reading notes, that it Is important to review what kind of harm we might do to others,before we can list the people we hurt. We can ask ourselves about situations in which each of our characte...	hotrod	1	384	Sep 19, 2015 by Iamhere
	Slogan for Today – Think - 9/19/15 (Preview) The slogan, Think helps us to remember to think before we act on or react to situations. This slogan helps us make good decisions about how to act. When we apply this slogan, it helps free us from distorted thinking and impulsive, potentially destructive decision-making.THINK .. Thoughtful. Ho...	Debb	2	528	Sep 19, 2015 by Iamhere
	Adult Child of an Alcoholic or not? (Preview) Hello Everyone, I have only just come across Al-anon this last week when my mums key worker suggested I look into local meetings, which I am doing. I have been doing lots of reading recently and have come across lots of info regarding Adult Children of Alcoholics, their personality traits and how futu...	Mich3lle	10	626	Sep 19, 2015 by tiiburbo
	When is enough? (Preview) I have been reading some of the posts and I saw one about an anniversary that an ah started drinking again. I started thinking in the past 4 years that my ah and I have been together how many anniversaries, birthdays, Christmas, there was a feeling of not good in the air and I have to tell you all of them. My a...	Helpangel	12	699	Sep 19, 2015 by tiiburbo
	Hello! (Preview) Hello everyone. I am obviously new here,but not new to Alanon.I have been in recovery for nearly a year.I live in a very small town with only one f2f meeting available each week.I feel I need more than what I am receiving there,therefore I started searching online and ended up here. I hope I can find what...	SoggySlippers	9	679	Sep 18, 2015 by Jerry F
	phone ????? (Preview) Hi all I have not posted for a while but feel the, urge to share this with you all. I have been in recovery for a few years people have alwaystold me to use my phone reach out. I havealways been good at taking calls from others in programme especially New comers. And Idid use, my phone when in a, lot of pain. I...	Tracy	1	464	Sep 18, 2015 by Iamhere
	Slogan for Today – How Important Is It - 9/18/15 (Preview) The slogan, How Important Is It helps us to have perspective, to determine what is of most value to us personally, and to avoid being upset over things that are of minimal importance at the moment. It helps free us to appreciate the good things that life offers. WAIT: Why Am I TalkingTGIF!	Debb	3	668	Sep 18, 2015 by Jill
	C2C 9-18 (Preview) The C2C reading for September 18 speaks about how our growth in Al-Anon is all a process and that time will offer us evidence that the program works. We can see the growth in our lives when we take the time to reflect about where we were a 6 month to a year ago. The longer that we live by these principles...	hotrod	6	549	Sep 18, 2015 by andromeda
	It's been a long time (Preview) Hi, I have not posted in a long time. I read your post frequently. It gives me hope that I might get better. I think I've stepped off the deep end and I'm afraid I won't know how to come back. i have been crying over the breakup of my marriage and my AH drinking again. I was attending 3 or 4 alanon meetings...	Confused2379	8	634	Sep 18, 2015 by hotrod
	Sorry (Preview) I want to apologize to anyone i offended with my last post. i wish i never started it from the start. The subject matters Are things i struggle with, have nothing to do with any of You. You all have been a great help and support and have helped me to keep My sanity. thank you for your warmth and caring. I wil...	Mirandac	17	804	Sep 18, 2015 by Mirandac
	a stressfull day, happy to have al anon! (Preview) Here's my day: Found out I may have to move (not sure but good chance rental is being sold) Nursing program starts next week, bought my $2,000 text books, getting nervous. Then received an email they are changing the requirements (after accepting us) we now have a biology class also. Last day to regist...	Rinn	3	398	Sep 17, 2015 by Rinn
	roses & orchids (Preview) I received roses & orchids from my church family today. My pastor & friend delivered them today. What joy fills my soul. & I am not a member yet. I consider them Friends. I am so grateful for thoughtful people. Just when you think you aren't important someone reminds you. Good thoughts ar...	Hoot Nanny	4	371	Sep 17, 2015 by tiredtonite
	The aftermath (Preview) I have been looking forward to my fall break from school for so long,it has been a tough and tiring semester.Now as I sit here,in the aftermath of the funeral I look around at the work I am behind on,laundry baskets running over,floors that need swept and mopped, and a host of other chores,I feel overw...	mjferg	2	501	Sep 17, 2015 by Debb
	good day for gratitude (Preview) I have so much to be grateful for. And nothing to be ungrateful for. No one ever says that they are ungrateful. I find myself wondering if I can find something to share that would benefit others. Maybe I can plant a seed in someone's mind or heart. I know that all this time in the program has made me wiser. Th...	Hoot Nanny	4	437	Sep 17, 2015 by hotrod
	C2C 9-17 (Preview) The C2C reading for September 17 speaks about "people pleasing " and how destructive this can become when we ignore our own needs and sacrifice ourselves and our well-being for the sake of others. The reading points out that it is important to get along with others an know how to work toge...	hotrod	2	409	Sep 17, 2015 by Iamhere
	Slogan for Today – Let It Begin With Me - 9/17/15 (Preview) The slogan, Let It Begin With Me helps us to keep the focus on and be responsible for our own actions and behaviors. This slogan helps us to take action to change the things we can change and to take the responsibility to get our own needs met, rather than waiting for others to change or to meet our needs for...	Debb	3	952	Sep 17, 2015 by Iamhere
	AH spoils a good day but I dont care!!! (Preview) The good part: Well.... I did it...sort of..well I will be doing it......called a phone number that a friend gave me to a friend of hers that has been going to al anon meetings for years...she was very delightful to talk to......she said she would sit with me at the f2f Sat morning and even hold my hand if I...	Broken513	5	678	Sep 17, 2015 by confused2015
	Log in inquiry (Preview) hi guys..is there a way somehow to print or have a list of how many times I've logged in? I know it sounds silly but since I'm not able to attend f2f meetings yet..I'm starting here. .my case worker wants a "report" of my log ins. Just to make sure I am surfing this website..any help would be ap...	mvg	2	327	Sep 17, 2015 by mvg
	Alcoholism really is a family disease (Preview) My now ex partner is a recovering alcoholic (he may have relapsed now for all I know) In summary, we were together for around 11 years. The first 6 he was an active drinker (the drinking was always the excuse for his bad behavior), the last 5 he was sober (no excuse for his bad behavior). I thought if he coul...	jml2012	12	1002	Sep 17, 2015 by jml2012
	Realising how much I still have to work on me. (Preview) It has been a while since I posted. More than a year actually. I have done a lot of work on 'ME' after leaving my addict ex-husband. Over the past few years I have really improved a lot. I got emotionally and financially back on my feet. I worked my butt off and was accepted into a Nursing program and hav...	Rinn	6	613	Sep 17, 2015 by Rinn
	my chaos (Preview) Hi everyone This is the very first time I use al-anon in my life! I mean, not using al-anon, but getting in touch with you folks On my way in the last weeks I came to this al-anon site and when I ticked 18 of these 20 questions I knew I needed to get in touch, to do something after all. I am German, a free spritit,...	annie-dresden	19	1186	Sep 17, 2015 by Rinn
	Still waiting .. (Preview) Still no job and trying not to go on meltdown mode, we are making due and doing ok. It's just kind of scary. It is what it is and I will get to where I need to be .. it's the flipping waiting that is driving me crazy. Some funny things that happened is having as much free time as I do I have to get out of the apart...	SerenityRUS	3	489	Sep 16, 2015 by Iamhere
	Prayer update .. (Preview) I have a little more information on the two situations that have been going on around me. My friends son is in rehab however not by his choice. So good news bad news kind of thing. My heart dropped when she told me exactly how bad things had really gotten. Maybe at least the seeds of recovery are startin...	SerenityRUS	4	414	Sep 16, 2015 by Green Eyes
	There is always love (Preview) Even in this darkness I am able to see God's mighty power at work.Finals are over and I have a long fall break before I go back to class.I have been concerned about having so much time on my hands after the funeral,I wasn't quite sure how I would cope.Well, yesterday a friend of mine called and said a tiny ki...	mjferg	6	614	Sep 16, 2015 by Debb
	C2C 9-16 (Preview) The C2C reading for September 16 speaks about "negative thoughts" and suggests that in the midst of a crisis these thoughts tell us the worst-case scenario and It is easy to think that they reflect the truth. The reading goes on to explain" feelings are not facts" and that...	hotrod	4	455	Sep 16, 2015 by Iamhere
	Slogan for Today – Just For Today - 9/16/15 (Preview) Just For Today: The slogan, Just For Today tells us that things are more manageable when we deal with and live in the present. Things that seem way too difficult to manage long term may seem more manageable if we deal with them just for today. We can move forward in small steps rather than be overwhelmed b...	Debb	5	1370	Sep 16, 2015 by Broken513
	words cannot describe. (Preview) I can see & I am so amazed by it! I feel a sense of relief & now I don't have to wait any longer. Those who have been following my posts probably have noticed the frustration that I had been going through. I know that all of you were waiting for the results of my eye procedure. I am happy to say that all w...	Hoot Nanny	6	709	Sep 15, 2015 by tiredtonite
	finals week (Preview) My finals were yesterday,I gave my speech and my instructor said it was amazing,the best she had ever heard from a student!She gave me an A plus.I felt amazing, as if I had uncovered some secret desire that has been hidden in my heart.When I was a little girl I spent a lot of time in my room reading,writing...	mjferg	5	438	Sep 15, 2015 by hotrod
	Slightly Off-Topic - Song Lyrics that I am Digging Right Now... (Preview) song....https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tIZitK6_IMQ "...	Iamhere	8	694	Sep 15, 2015 by hotrod
	Slogan for Today – First Things First - 9/15/15 (Preview) First Things First: The slogan, First Things First helps us to set reasonable priorities and to keep a realistic perspective. This slogan helps us to make choices we are comfortable with, and to act with balance rather than react to crises. {{HUGS To Everyone}}	Debb	5	679	Sep 15, 2015 by Rinn
	Sponsor Help Sponsor (Preview) Hi! I have been in Al-Anon for a year and currently have a sponsor with whom I work the steps (on step 8). I attend two meetings a week. One is my home group and the other is an open AA meeting. I semi-regularly attend a "How Al-Anon works" book study. I hold a service position in my home group. Wh...	amf	5	6135	Sep 15, 2015 by amf
	Local alanon meetings are all at night or are "closed" meetings (Preview) I come to this online message board to learn the alanon tools because all the meetings that are a reasonable driving distance for me are either listed as closed or are at night (I dont drive at night). There are lots of AA meetings that are open or in the daytime, but not alanon. Can I get a sponsor through...	lgnutah	8	649	Sep 15, 2015 by RealitySucker
	Hope for Today sept 15- sorry posted w no topic (Preview) Good mothing everyone- Today's reading is about making amends. The writer notes that her most profound experience with making amends came from receiving amends from someone else in the fellowship. I have not had that particular experience, but I do remember as I was working the steps with my spon...	yanksfan51	4	476	Sep 15, 2015 by Broken513
	this should be a relief, but it isn't (Preview) My husband and I have been married for over 5 years. For at least the past 3 years I have suspected his is an alcoholic. I have confronted him more times than i can even count. He always denied, said I had the problem with his drinking not him, said everyone drinks, said he doesn't miss work because of drink...	Paisley74	5	591	Sep 14, 2015 by Iamhere
	Praciticing my program .. (Preview) So I have been reminded that I am so not in control .. my car has been out of commission since last week. My girlfriend's husband who I just don't like and I think I figured it out .. there is part me and part he reminds me of my XAH. God has a wicked sense of humor .. lol .. the husband offered to fix my car for fr...	SerenityRUS	7	605	Sep 14, 2015 by Jen61
	my speech (Preview) On top of everything else I have been going through I am in finals week at school.It is good for me though,I am glad I am busy.I will say the worse thing I can do is lay in my bed.My mind starts twisting things all around and has me feeling responsible for every tragic event that ever happened in my life.I tu...	mjferg	4	618	Sep 14, 2015 by Debb
	What a mess! (Preview) Alcoholics make of their lives and, despite our attempts to detach, of others. My son is presently in another country far across the ocean and a couple of continents. His visa expired some time ago and he knows he is going to have to leave and come home. He met a girl when he was there, fell in love and now.....	deacon	3	563	Sep 14, 2015 by Debb
	C2C 9-14 (Preview) The C2C reading for September 14 speaks about the destructive habits that we develop having lived with the disease of alcoholism. It points out that because of many painful lessons and experiences, we tend to lose the ability to "Hope", sink into despair, shut down our feelings and ref...	hotrod	4	471	Sep 14, 2015 by Debb
	Boundaries- OMG he came around! (Preview) After a painful weekend and thinking we are finally done bc of everything I wrote (boundary vs control) he said well I read it again today and now it's not that bad and that he is sorry we fought and he causes so many problems. Say what??? Why is it that when he ends it I hurt but I'm ok. Why can't I say I'm sorry...	Helpangel	4	588	Sep 14, 2015 by Debb
	What should I do? Opinions wanted please (Preview) Last week I found our three year old in my front yard unattended. My husband drove to daycare to pick her up, drunk, and left her in the yard when he got home. I pulled around the corner minutes after he came home thank god. I took his keys and wallet and called his mother to come get him. We are now separated....	ACoffman	9	665	Sep 14, 2015 by Rinn
	Discussing CoDependcy with a Teenager .. LOL (Preview) My daughter and I had a funny/ironic discussion about codependency and how parts of us are pretty much groomed from an early age to people please, be the peace makers and so on, looking for that positive reinforcement that we are enough. Somewhere my thinking got distorted that I wasn't enough and lo...	SerenityRUS	1	388	Sep 14, 2015 by Iamhere
	Living with a "dry drunk". New here (Preview) My husband was involved in a drinking and driving accident a little over a month ago. Thankfully he did not hit someone else and was not seriously injured. Through an intervention we were able to convince him to go for treatment. He was admitted into a detox facility for only 2 days because his sympt...	saalbema	10	898	Sep 14, 2015 by ACoffman
	Driving me crazy (Preview) My AH, who hasn't drank in 1 week is driving me crazy. I am angry with him because of all that has been done to our relationship. He wants to act like nothing is wrong, I am having a tough time with this. He sends me cute, (dumb), little texts and I don't know how to reply because, in all reality, I don't car...	confused2015	5	611	Sep 14, 2015 by ACoffman
	Slogan for Today – Easy Does It - 9/14/15 (Preview) Easy Does It: The slogan, Easy Does It helps us remember that trying to force solutions often does not work. We may not be able to solve every problem in the time frame we wish to solve it in. Some problems may not be for us to solve. Sometimes a gentler, more patient approach is more effective and less frus...	Debb	1	459	Sep 14, 2015 by Iamhere
	Tomorrow! (Preview) Tomorrow is the day of my eye procedure! I am excited & a bit overwhelmed. It is two days earlier than I originally thought. So less waiting time. I will be on here soon w the results. Thanks to everyone who thinks of me & prays for me. I love you all! Kathleen	Hoot Nanny	6	272	Sep 14, 2015 by tiredtonite
	Slogan for Today – Keep It Simple - 9/12/15 (Preview) Keep It Simple: The slogan, Keep It Simple helps to remind us that simple solutions are often the most effective ones. This slogan can help us look at what really is happening rather than what we imagine may happen, and to take a reasonable, step by step approach rather than act out of fear or panic. FEA...	Debb	3	3069	Sep 13, 2015 by Fairlee
	Boundaries versus control-codepency overload! (Preview) Hi everyone. I have been reading a lot about codependency and I think I got a little feisty and after an argument with my ah (that is not living with us since July and having to learn my job from him) I sent him an email saying what my boundaries where when he came over. Which was when he comes over to help me wi...	Helpangel	16	748	Sep 13, 2015 by Fairlee
	My reality vs my home group (closed) (Preview) I have a subject i struggle with at my home group alanon vs friends. I keep finding over and over in my home group after my mtg people do not trust my reality of life. I often find it very off putting. I am intelligent, with it and no fool. Maybe about my xah but otherwise a very grounded Person. I do not thi...	Mirandac	16	741	Sep 13, 2015 by Mirandac
	C2C 9-12 (Preview) The C2C reading for September 12 speaks about the concept of awareness and acceptance. It points out that often we become aware of a problem and once we obtain that awareness , it must be followed by a period known as "acceptance ", before we can actually take an effective action. This is wh...	hotrod	4	549	Sep 13, 2015 by Iamhere
	Getting detached (Preview) For a week and a half my wife and I got separated. We have been together for 4 years, well, 4 years tomorrow. We weren't having a healthy relationship, we never got physical but mental abusive and controlling. She was the one who took the decision. During the first two days I was in completely chaos becau...	Nchc	7	548	Sep 13, 2015 by Iamhere
	ODAT 9/12 - Advise With Care (Preview) Today's reading in One Day at a Time in AlAnon (ODAT) is particularly helpful to me in my recovery. Before I came to AlAnon, I didn't realize that my tendency to advise others was a symptom of me trying to control what I could not, nor should not. AlAnon helped me realize that telling others what they shou...	Enigmatic	7	708	Sep 13, 2015 by Iamhere
	C2C 9-13 (Preview) The C2C reading for September 13 speaks about living one day at a time so as to make every day an important day. Each day we can try to improve our relationship with HP,the people in our lives, and ourselves by using the 12 steps, prayer mediation and alanon principles to help us pursue this goal. ...	hotrod	2	406	Sep 13, 2015 by Iamhere
	Slogan for Today – But For The Grace Of God - 9/13/15 (Preview) But For The Grace Of God: The slogan, But For The Grace Of God helps to remind us to be compassionate with others, including the alcoholics in our lives. This slogan can help us avoid impatience, criticism, resentment, and vengefulness, which does harm to ourselves as well as to others. THINK .. Th...	Debb	3	540	Sep 13, 2015 by Iamhere
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.