Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Char724 · Char724

I am new here. I have never had an AH this close before and although I am familiar with the program due to a recovering late Brother in law, it never hit home like this has. This is my neighbor. His live in has left and moved back twice now,this third time he had no one. I understood he was a drinker, but he was n...

Theoceancalls · Theoceancalls

I start this off that way becayse i swear i just dont know who i am, what i feel or what i think. I do think its startinhlg to sink into my ah that im done. I left this house this morning and have stayed away all day. Let him kno i might go to my parents for dinner and woukd like to bring daughter but that if he would...

mjferg · mjferg

I woke up early this morning with a different feeling, a more peaceful feeling than I have had in a while.I have been so busy with school and the grieving that I feel like I kind of lost myself.Yesterday was a day crammed full of work,I ran errands,I wrote three papers and an essay, studied for a test and to...

medicmoni · medicmoni

Thank you to those that have decided to share your story and struggle. I find solace and strength in knowing that I am not alone in my struggles with my ABF. I have found strength in your encouraging posts, and found myself asking this very question last night and today.I have been wrestling with leavin...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I was disturbed by that topic today as it was the reading we chose at our meeting. I Would rather have almost any other topic today as I wasn't feeling very sane. I didn't try to control the meeting but wanted to share something else. I waited a long time before I shared. I hope no one thought I was having a pr...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for November 12 speaks about applying the tools of Al-Anon to our everyday life. It uses the example of watching and really listening to people in Al-Anon meetings as they share on the difficult problems that they face. By uncritical listening, we can see how they apply the slo...

Debb · Debb

I have been learning the knack of listening uncritically to everything I hear. If we are consistently focused on our own negativity and confusion, then we are unable to hear and listen to what is being said to us, therefore we do not learn. It is a privilege of wisdom to listen ~ O.W. HolmesHonestly wo...

missmeliss · missmeliss

My mum is only 58. But her memory has been bad for a long time and maybe a year ago I finally figured out she wasn't asking me the same questions over and over because she was trying to wind me up, she honestly didn't remember having asked me a few minutes ago. Well it's getting so much worse. This isn't alcoh...

Debb · Debb

Have you noticed that when you react too emotionally to a situation, even an unjustified verbal attack, it really can make you sick, with actual physical symptoms? Al-Anon has taught me to keep my own well being in mind; I try to detach when the storm clouds of tension and temper appear. This is healt...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for November 11 speaks about the insanity of the disease of alcoholism. It defines the word insanity as; "doing something the same way over and over and expecting different results. I can certainly identify with this action, because I did this continually - I thought my wa...

andromeda · andromeda

So, I was reviewing some old notes from an Al Anon convention I went to back in July. The speaker asked us these 4 key questions, which I will ask of all of you. This is a great exercise to bring back centeredness and to bring God back into the equation of working your steps: 1. How can I make better contac...

jamky · jamky

I know it's a cleche' people say dont take your loved ones for granted. I have seen it several times this week alone. But tonight I had to say goodbye to my soulmate of 24 years. I had always pictured us growing old together, sitting on a porch in our rockingchairs watching our grandchildren play... all o...

PUPPY · PUPPY

I had a worry that as soon as my son contacted us two weeks ago and told us he's been sober and wants to re established his relationship with us that I would start reverting back to my codependent . He called me on Monday to ask if we could all get together on Saturday.. I said I would call him back after I check...

el-cee · el-cee

I got up this morning, said hello to my higher power, got focussed on my program before I even got out of bed. The morning went so smoothly as if my higher power was telling me something. So right from the off I was presented with choices. My sons gf hurt her leg and took a day off work. Right away I felt some ju...

Lee8375 · Lee8375

May seem a daft question and I know that in some situations the answer may be more to do with personal safety but at what point should someone completely throw the towel in and give up on someone they love. Is it when the loved one stops trying, is it when they revert to type and the full/empty bottles &...

finn · finn

I am leading a meeting on anonymity because it has come up that it can be uncomfortable when you meet a fellow member in public and someone asks "How do you know that person"? I haven't found any information in any of my books that give ideas about this subject.

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I don't want to repeat myself over & over again but it is happening again just quieter. I am not on the library computer but on my tablet in the library. Another lesson in tolerance. This guy needs help & I totally get it. My day went OK after leaving here yesterday. I am working on serenity for tod...

Theoceancalls · Theoceancalls

I cant even begin to describe how bad this day was. I met with legal consult, email fought with my ah all day. .Niw im the problem, have always been the problem and yet i say the affair was my last straw. .Claims he shouodve taken last straw years ago when i stopped loving and caring and needing. And hes now o...

Shakti · Shakti

so today is my alcoholic sons birthday and we were supposed to go out for dinner. but he arrives to my home hungover from the evening before! looking terrible. i was hurt disappointed that even for this special day he made no effort to remain ok. so i decided to cancel our dinner bookings was tempted to th...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- This reading is about the power of writing in terms of our recovery. Being able to freely express feelings, get them down on paper and even read them through more objectively we all ways that have been helpful to me in healing. Posting on this site and feeling the support of your...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I might be like him at times but there is a man in the library who can't keep quiet & yelling at the top of his lungs. He is trying to be overly helpful & is getting on my nerves somewhat. This might determine how long I am on here. God has a sense of humor because I have to tolerate & be patient w/ ot...

Yankeerose · Yankeerose

Hi everyone! I haven't posted in a few months but I do read everyone else's posts almost every day and find lots of strength and hope. Just a little update: we closed on our house on Sept 10 and are all moved into our new condo which is a very nice place just a bit tight for the 4 of us but we are saving money by b...

Jerry F · Jerry F

The Eagle won In Dallas...I'm ecstatic but not crazy yet. She's become more of a fan and I'm becoming brain dead. lol I'm done ...need serenity now. (((hugs)))

Iamhere · Iamhere

Some of you may remember that I attended my HS reunion (35 years) this year, maybe in May. I remember RSVP'ing and being excited in the beginning. As it got closer to the event, I began to second guess my choice to go, be fearful and anxious about seeing people, and answering any questions related to my...

hardheadedwoman · hardheadedwoman

I have recently accepted the fact that I have been living with a AH for many years. I am beginning to learn about alcoholism and the role it is playing in our lives. I thought my husband was just an emotionally unavailable, unaffectionate, stubborn, argumentative, immature, selfish, uncaring, inc...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

And not so much .. LOL .. I really am my own worst enemy .. I guess the good news is that I have awareness of that and I really am trying to do things differently. I'm sorting through some feelings and things that are going on at the moment, what can I change, what can let go of and what do I need to address. The...

Lyne · Lyne

Hi friends~Ah yes the holiday is approaching. My spouse is attempting not to drink, and my son and daughter-in-law are trying to loose a little weight. My sister-in-law knows my spouse has a drinking problem and a few years back, did not serve alcohol. I thought that was so sensitive and supportiv...

el-cee · el-cee

One of the symptoms or shortcomings that came into my awareness early on in alanon was my immaturity. I seriously had a really child like view of what my world should look like. Maybe i was exposed to a bit too much tv, disney or fairytales about princesses and happy ever afters. I wanted the fairytale an...

joker · joker

Since my last post, its by a true miracle and prayers that my alcoholic bf that could not stay sober for more than 3 days has been sober now for 5 weeks. Its a miracle. However, now the nightmare is starting all over again. He is very unmotivated and deeply depressed. All he has energy for is to eat and sleep...

Debb · Debb

"Self-love can be the source of hostility and arrogance, a big ego around which everything can revolve". "It makes one unable to see anyones point of view but our own". "It is the mark of a mind which is closed to feeling for others". "Love of self, carries...

Debb · Debb

As I become less self-centered, I will have stronger defenses against being hurt by slights and injustices. Minor crises will not loom large because I will not allow myself to magnify them out of proportion to their importance. "I pray that I may grow in my ability to use each day with poise, wis...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for November 8 speaks about the little pamphlet entitled:"Just for Today. It selects the simple thoughts :" just for today I will do somebody a good turn and not be found doing it. If anyone it. It will not count. This is a great exercise to help us to break the habit of bei...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for November 7 speaks about alcoholism as a family disease. It points out that this disease not only affects the drinker but those who care about them and live with them . Some of us have absorbed alcoholic thinking that has been passed on from generation to generation. This thinkin...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for November 9 speaks about finding creative solutions to impossible situation. It points out that living with the disease of alcoholism we develop destructive coping tools such as being extremely manipulative in order to get what we want. It points out that Alcoholism creates s...

texasgal · texasgal

It's been a little over a week since I broke up with the man I had been dating. I have been doubling up on my meetings and looking for positive things to do. He has been texting me that he loves me and that he is sorry abt what had happened and that he wants me. I met with him a couple of days ago and we talked. When...

Bloodshotbetty · Bloodshotbetty

I am currently going through the process of divorcing my AH and moving out of our (awesome, amazing) apartment. I keep wavering and having a very hard time with detachment and resentment of having to uproot my life. I use Melody Beattie's "Journey to the Heart" in addition to my daily Al-A...

mjferg · mjferg

I am struggling with my grief work.My therapist suggested going to visit the grave site of my ex,I didn't go after the funeral,I just went home.She thinks I need more closure.In the meantime,school is overwhelming me,my house,and the animal situation is too much!!!I feel so drained right now!!I lo...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Memorial service w taps at the end. Always makes me cry. Service to my nation is an emotional experience. I got through the sharing I did. He was a long standing member of AA w over 30 years of sobriety. Generous & loving man. A friend to all.

ChipsAreFalling · ChipsAreFalling

I'm thinking it's time I sought out a sponsor to work the steps, as I need the kick in the butt to get started seriously. However, I'm at a loss how to decide who to ask (and a little apprehensive about actually doing the asking to be honest). How did you decide who would be a good fit for you?

Ms_Taylor · Ms_Taylor

I'm not evensure where to start. I emotions have been running me crazy. I have been trying to attend a meeting in person as I have never attended on before; but it seems imposible to do with my schedule. I will be attending an online meeting tonight. I feel so lost I married an Acholic-Adict who I love dear...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hi everyone, A while back, I posted something about my wife having broken my windshield after throwing a bag of recyclables down 2 flights of stairs to the driveway with poor aim. She was going to pay for the windshield replacement by selling her baseball card collection. Well, I haven't seen any pr...

serenity47 · serenity47

I try to keep my expectations low as it only hurts me in the long run. Sometimes though it is the small things that hurt the most. When I am trying hard to have a relationship with the active A and they frequently don't show up, no phone call, text etc when they say they will or show up severely hung over . ...

Broken513 · Broken513

Does anyone know how I can do this without creating a new account?

Captain Jigglypuff · Captain Jigglypuff

I was abused both mentally and verbally by the woman who helped my dad raise me when I was younger. My mom left us when I was 3 and a half and this woman who was working for my dad offered to help him because he has his own business which is still open and dad couldn't always be home for my sister and me or take us t...

OceanTide · OceanTide

What else would I expect really...talked to XABF for an hour and a half Today. He has moved on with someone he met at AA. I'm not going to talk about what I think of him and that situation becuase the venom will poison me. I will stick to myself. I'm hurt, devastated, sad, depressed, angry, as usual. I'm a fo...

123456abcdef · 123456abcdef

My son is almost one and his father is an alcoholic. I have been struggling with what's the right way to raise him. I would never want to watch my son suffer from this disease. It scares me. I don't know how active his father will be in his life so essentially it will just be me. Do I take out all alcohol fro...

SoggySlippers · SoggySlippers

I haven't been coming here as much as I probably should or need to.I keep telling myself that my weekly f2f meeting,and that group of people 'should' be enough,that I need to just keep my focus on those meetings and reading the literature and working the steps in between,which I have been doing. It is no...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Hello family - I'll try to be brief but am struggling to get over/beyond/through my most recent situation with one of my qualifiers. As you all know, my oldest had a new baby recently - 10/6. Before that, I was helping with G-Child 1 each Monday and Thursday evening while my son is at school and the baby m...

Bloodshotbetty · Bloodshotbetty

to leave my husband. I told him I wanted a divorce. After all of the legal trouble, emotional abuse, stealing, and lost jobs...I just can't do it anymore. I know it's the right choice, but I feel so broken right now. He is going to die if he doesn't get help. And I can't save him. I currently have no ide...

Theoceancalls · Theoceancalls

So I think it'S been about 3 weekS Since I found the pictureS of my huSband and hiS lateSt affair. I set a boundary said I'm done and want to divorce and he has spent every day since convincin. g me that I owe him yet another chance yes he's apologized and he's been kind and gracious and all of that kind while h...

Cindy1954 · Cindy1954

My sister has been sober for a few years now but has stopped going to meetings and working her program. We have a business together so need to have interaction. She used to apologize when she said something that hurt me. Since not working a program, she is mean. It seems I'm always defending myself...

KennyFenderjazz · KennyFenderjazz

Daisy, you can see her in my profile pic and attached. She's 18-19 years old, and been the best dog we ever could have hoped for, been here all my son's life. She's been healthy as a horse, he vet is continually amazed at her good health. She's a mutt we got at the humane society. We came originally for a d...

fortoday · fortoday

I am just starting back into alanon. I have been away way too long and lost all my serenity, centeredness and peace. I was involved and did the step work about six years ago. Didn't maintain it though. Now I am watching my grown daughter recover from a bad trip off pcp put in marijuana and I am married now to...

Bethany66 · Bethany66

I was really struggling last night with my AH's drinking. I knew in my head that I should be able to detach, not let it get to me, don't engage, all the stuff I read about and hear about in Al-Anon. He isn't a mean drunk, he is more the needy, fishing for praise and attention, talkative and often know-it-a...

Theoceancalls · Theoceancalls

As time drags on from deciding in done with this marriage, im finding ut harder and harder to go home, pkay nice and dake it. I feel my ah is manipulating me every step.of the way. HE had muktiple drunken sex encounters and was caught and yet serms entitled to still bully me and call the shots. He still refu...

el-cee · el-cee

Todays reading is about how we often have a faulty sense of self due to this disease we are all affected by. Our belief systems are often out of date, not based on facts, have little evidence and we seem to cling on to these beliefs as if its all we have got. Letting go of the negative self talk and belief syst...

Debb · Debb

No one really needs to suffer unhappiness and discontent or be deprived of the good things of life. We can find the way out by daily study of The Twelve Steps. This wholesome spiritual philosophy will help us find our way into the light of a good life. "I pray for the willingness to accept the diffi...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

I am a double winner. I have been sober for a long time in AA and just now realizing I have adult child issues. I am going to Alanon and ACA. When I am in an AA meeting and share my experience, after I share I often get cross-talked at in a subtle (but not so subtle) manipulative way that is meant to tear down or d...

runningwife · runningwife

Hello all, I filed for divorce from my AH. This was after many incidents of public intoxication, arrest, OWI, and many more, including losing his job. However, I am still so afraid. I have moved out of the house with the children (which I have sole custody of for now). I am so afraid he will take the childr...

Hope2000 · Hope2000

So I'm struggling again. My next F2F meeting is Wednesday and my AH is actively drinking again. He just finished up probation on his 2nd DUI in 3 years and tonight was the worst he's been in awhile. I have my daughter here this evening so I was doing all I could do to keep him happy and not getting angry with m...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	When you love an AH , who says they do not love you the same. (Preview) I am new here. I have never had an AH this close before and although I am familiar with the program due to a recovering late Brother in law, it never hit home like this has. This is my neighbor. His live in has left and moved back twice now,this third time he had no one. I understood he was a drinker, but he was n...	Char724	3	512	Nov 12, 2015 by tiredtonite
	this disease messes with everything (Preview) I start this off that way becayse i swear i just dont know who i am, what i feel or what i think. I do think its startinhlg to sink into my ah that im done. I left this house this morning and have stayed away all day. Let him kno i might go to my parents for dinner and woukd like to bring daughter but that if he would...	Theoceancalls	14	674	Nov 12, 2015 by Theoceancalls
	a struggle with being critical of myself (Preview) I woke up early this morning with a different feeling, a more peaceful feeling than I have had in a while.I have been so busy with school and the grieving that I feel like I kind of lost myself.Yesterday was a day crammed full of work,I ran errands,I wrote three papers and an essay, studied for a test and to...	mjferg	4	743	Nov 12, 2015 by Mattie
	Asking myself daily: Do I stay or do I go? (Preview) Thank you to those that have decided to share your story and struggle. I find solace and strength in knowing that I am not alone in my struggles with my ABF. I have found strength in your encouraging posts, and found myself asking this very question last night and today.I have been wrestling with leavin...	medicmoni	6	806	Nov 12, 2015 by medicmoni
	insanity (Preview) I was disturbed by that topic today as it was the reading we chose at our meeting. I Would rather have almost any other topic today as I wasn't feeling very sane. I didn't try to control the meeting but wanted to share something else. I waited a long time before I shared. I hope no one thought I was having a pr...	Hoot Nanny	6	905	Nov 12, 2015 by hotrod
	Courage to Change Reading for 11-12 (Preview) The C2C reading for November 12 speaks about applying the tools of Al-Anon to our everyday life. It uses the example of watching and really listening to people in Al-Anon meetings as they share on the difficult problems that they face. By uncritical listening, we can see how they apply the slo...	hotrod	1	473	Nov 12, 2015 by Iamhere
	One Day At A Time Quotes ~ Listening ~ 11/12/15 (Preview) I have been learning the knack of listening uncritically to everything I hear. If we are consistently focused on our own negativity and confusion, then we are unable to hear and listen to what is being said to us, therefore we do not learn. It is a privilege of wisdom to listen ~ O.W. HolmesHonestly wo...	Debb	2	515	Nov 12, 2015 by el-cee
	Say something? Let it be? Ugh! (Preview) My mum is only 58. But her memory has been bad for a long time and maybe a year ago I finally figured out she wasn't asking me the same questions over and over because she was trying to wind me up, she honestly didn't remember having asked me a few minutes ago. Well it's getting so much worse. This isn't alcoh...	missmeliss	12	651	Nov 11, 2015 by Mattie
	One Day At A Time Quotes ~ Peace of Mind ~ 11/11/15 (Preview) Have you noticed that when you react too emotionally to a situation, even an unjustified verbal attack, it really can make you sick, with actual physical symptoms? Al-Anon has taught me to keep my own well being in mind; I try to detach when the storm clouds of tension and temper appear. This is healt...	Debb	2	457	Nov 11, 2015 by missmeliss
	C2C 11-11 (Preview) The C2C reading for November 11 speaks about the insanity of the disease of alcoholism. It defines the word insanity as; "doing something the same way over and over and expecting different results. I can certainly identify with this action, because I did this continually - I thought my wa...	hotrod	3	441	Nov 11, 2015 by Iamhere
	Things I took from convention (Preview) So, I was reviewing some old notes from an Al Anon convention I went to back in July. The speaker asked us these 4 key questions, which I will ask of all of you. This is a great exercise to bring back centeredness and to bring God back into the equation of working your steps: 1. How can I make better contac...	andromeda	4	540	Nov 11, 2015 by Iamhere
	Please stop the madness (Preview) I know it's a cleche' people say dont take your loved ones for granted. I have seen it several times this week alone. But tonight I had to say goodbye to my soulmate of 24 years. I had always pictured us growing old together, sitting on a porch in our rockingchairs watching our grandchildren play... all o...	jamky	7	618	Nov 11, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	Detachment (Preview) I had a worry that as soon as my son contacted us two weeks ago and told us he's been sober and wants to re established his relationship with us that I would start reverting back to my codependent . He called me on Monday to ask if we could all get together on Saturday.. I said I would call him back after I check...	PUPPY	9	685	Nov 11, 2015 by Debb
	HP's will = happiness (Preview) I got up this morning, said hello to my higher power, got focussed on my program before I even got out of bed. The morning went so smoothly as if my higher power was telling me something. So right from the off I was presented with choices. My sons gf hurt her leg and took a day off work. Right away I felt some ju...	el-cee	3	544	Nov 11, 2015 by Debb
	At what point does detachment with love move to detachment (Preview) May seem a daft question and I know that in some situations the answer may be more to do with personal safety but at what point should someone completely throw the towel in and give up on someone they love. Is it when the loved one stops trying, is it when they revert to type and the full/empty bottles &...	Lee8375	15	1069	Nov 10, 2015 by Shakti
	How to introduce an Al Anon member that you meet in public. How to say you know each other??? Anonymity when meeting a member in public (Preview) I am leading a meeting on anonymity because it has come up that it can be uncomfortable when you meet a fellow member in public and someone asks "How do you know that person"? I haven't found any information in any of my books that give ideas about this subject.	finn	8	650	Nov 10, 2015 by maryjane
	same thing different day! (Preview) I don't want to repeat myself over & over again but it is happening again just quieter. I am not on the library computer but on my tablet in the library. Another lesson in tolerance. This guy needs help & I totally get it. My day went OK after leaving here yesterday. I am working on serenity for tod...	Hoot Nanny	4	547	Nov 10, 2015 by Iamhere
	horrible day? (Preview) I cant even begin to describe how bad this day was. I met with legal consult, email fought with my ah all day. .Niw im the problem, have always been the problem and yet i say the affair was my last straw. .Claims he shouodve taken last straw years ago when i stopped loving and caring and needing. And hes now o...	Theoceancalls	12	690	Nov 10, 2015 by YARNCRAZY
	confused (Preview) so today is my alcoholic sons birthday and we were supposed to go out for dinner. but he arrives to my home hungover from the evening before! looking terrible. i was hurt disappointed that even for this special day he made no effort to remain ok. so i decided to cancel our dinner bookings was tempted to th...	Shakti	4	498	Nov 10, 2015 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today Nov 10 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- This reading is about the power of writing in terms of our recovery. Being able to freely express feelings, get them down on paper and even read them through more objectively we all ways that have been helpful to me in healing. Posting on this site and feeling the support of your...	yanksfan51	3	455	Nov 10, 2015 by andromeda
	disturbing man in the library...Patience & Tolerance (Preview) I might be like him at times but there is a man in the library who can't keep quiet & yelling at the top of his lungs. He is trying to be overly helpful & is getting on my nerves somewhat. This might determine how long I am on here. God has a sense of humor because I have to tolerate & be patient w/ ot...	Hoot Nanny	5	549	Nov 9, 2015 by Jerry F
	Always looking for more.... (Preview) Hi everyone! I haven't posted in a few months but I do read everyone else's posts almost every day and find lots of strength and hope. Just a little update: we closed on our house on Sept 10 and are all moved into our new condo which is a very nice place just a bit tight for the 4 of us but we are saving money by b...	Yankeerose	8	648	Nov 9, 2015 by Yankeerose
	My wife just lost her serenity... (Preview) The Eagle won In Dallas...I'm ecstatic but not crazy yet. She's become more of a fan and I'm becoming brain dead. lol I'm done ...need serenity now. (((hugs)))	Jerry F	4	528	Nov 9, 2015 by Jerry F
	Excitement and Anxiety over Road Trip (Preview) Some of you may remember that I attended my HS reunion (35 years) this year, maybe in May. I remember RSVP'ing and being excited in the beginning. As it got closer to the event, I began to second guess my choice to go, be fearful and anxious about seeing people, and answering any questions related to my...	Iamhere	13	689	Nov 9, 2015 by Iamhere
	?New to Group so many questions (Preview) I have recently accepted the fact that I have been living with a AH for many years. I am beginning to learn about alcoholism and the role it is playing in our lives. I thought my husband was just an emotionally unavailable, unaffectionate, stubborn, argumentative, immature, selfish, uncaring, inc...	hardheadedwoman	23	1107	Nov 9, 2015 by a4l
	Changes .. (Preview) And not so much .. LOL .. I really am my own worst enemy .. I guess the good news is that I have awareness of that and I really am trying to do things differently. I'm sorting through some feelings and things that are going on at the moment, what can I change, what can let go of and what do I need to address. The...	SerenityRUS	6	1055	Nov 9, 2015 by Debb
	Thanksgiving (Preview) Hi friends~Ah yes the holiday is approaching. My spouse is attempting not to drink, and my son and daughter-in-law are trying to loose a little weight. My sister-in-law knows my spouse has a drinking problem and a few years back, did not serve alcohol. I thought that was so sensitive and supportiv...	Lyne	6	825	Nov 9, 2015 by Lyne
	alcoholism and fairy tales (Preview) One of the symptoms or shortcomings that came into my awareness early on in alanon was my immaturity. I seriously had a really child like view of what my world should look like. Maybe i was exposed to a bit too much tv, disney or fairytales about princesses and happy ever afters. I wanted the fairytale an...	el-cee	9	850	Nov 9, 2015 by ABM
	Dealing with a sober ABF (Preview) Since my last post, its by a true miracle and prayers that my alcoholic bf that could not stay sober for more than 3 days has been sober now for 5 weeks. Its a miracle. However, now the nightmare is starting all over again. He is very unmotivated and deeply depressed. All he has energy for is to eat and sleep...	joker	4	704	Nov 9, 2015 by milkwood
	One Day At A Time Quotes ~ Self Love ~ 11/08/15 (Preview) "Self-love can be the source of hostility and arrogance, a big ego around which everything can revolve". "It makes one unable to see anyones point of view but our own". "It is the mark of a mind which is closed to feeling for others". "Love of self, carries...	Debb	4	4575	Nov 9, 2015 by Iamhere
	Thought for Today ~ Becoming Stronger ~ 11/07/15 (Preview) As I become less self-centered, I will have stronger defenses against being hurt by slights and injustices. Minor crises will not loom large because I will not allow myself to magnify them out of proportion to their importance. "I pray that I may grow in my ability to use each day with poise, wis...	Debb	7	558	Nov 9, 2015 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change reading for 11-8 (Preview) The C2C reading for November 8 speaks about the little pamphlet entitled:"Just for Today. It selects the simple thoughts :" just for today I will do somebody a good turn and not be found doing it. If anyone it. It will not count. This is a great exercise to help us to break the habit of bei...	hotrod	1	589	Nov 9, 2015 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change 11-7 (Preview) The C2C reading for November 7 speaks about alcoholism as a family disease. It points out that this disease not only affects the drinker but those who care about them and live with them . Some of us have absorbed alcoholic thinking that has been passed on from generation to generation. This thinkin...	hotrod	3	880	Nov 9, 2015 by Iamhere
	C2C reading 11=9 (Preview) The C2C reading for November 9 speaks about finding creative solutions to impossible situation. It points out that living with the disease of alcoholism we develop destructive coping tools such as being extremely manipulative in order to get what we want. It points out that Alcoholism creates s...	hotrod	4	530	Nov 9, 2015 by Hoot Nanny
	Healing (Preview) It's been a little over a week since I broke up with the man I had been dating. I have been doubling up on my meetings and looking for positive things to do. He has been texting me that he loves me and that he is sorry abt what had happened and that he wants me. I met with him a couple of days ago and we talked. When...	texasgal	4	628	Nov 9, 2015 by Iamhere
	I think I just had an HP moment. (Preview) I am currently going through the process of divorcing my AH and moving out of our (awesome, amazing) apartment. I keep wavering and having a very hard time with detachment and resentment of having to uproot my life. I use Melody Beattie's "Journey to the Heart" in addition to my daily Al-A...	Bloodshotbetty	4	588	Nov 9, 2015 by Debb
	i feel like a volcano! (Preview) I am struggling with my grief work.My therapist suggested going to visit the grave site of my ex,I didn't go after the funeral,I just went home.She thinks I need more closure.In the meantime,school is overwhelming me,my house,and the animal situation is too much!!!I feel so drained right now!!I lo...	mjferg	4	626	Nov 8, 2015 by a4l
	saying goodbye w Taps (Preview) Memorial service w taps at the end. Always makes me cry. Service to my nation is an emotional experience. I got through the sharing I did. He was a long standing member of AA w over 30 years of sobriety. Generous & loving man. A friend to all.	Hoot Nanny	5	476	Nov 8, 2015 by Iamhere
	Getting a sponsor? (Preview) I'm thinking it's time I sought out a sponsor to work the steps, as I need the kick in the butt to get started seriously. However, I'm at a loss how to decide who to ask (and a little apprehensive about actually doing the asking to be honest). How did you decide who would be a good fit for you?	ChipsAreFalling	3	589	Nov 8, 2015 by Iamhere
	Anger--Hurt--Crazyness (Preview) I'm not evensure where to start. I emotions have been running me crazy. I have been trying to attend a meeting in person as I have never attended on before; but it seems imposible to do with my schedule. I will be attending an online meeting tonight. I feel so lost I married an Acholic-Adict who I love dear...	Ms_Taylor	5	719	Nov 8, 2015 by Iamhere
	Success! (Preview) Hi everyone, A while back, I posted something about my wife having broken my windshield after throwing a bag of recyclables down 2 flights of stairs to the driveway with poor aim. She was going to pay for the windshield replacement by selling her baseball card collection. Well, I haven't seen any pr...	Skorpi	3	388	Nov 8, 2015 by Iamhere
	Expectations (Preview) I try to keep my expectations low as it only hurts me in the long run. Sometimes though it is the small things that hurt the most. When I am trying hard to have a relationship with the active A and they frequently don't show up, no phone call, text etc when they say they will or show up severely hung over . ...	serenity47	4	570	Nov 8, 2015 by Iamhere
	Trying to change nickname for message board. (Preview) Does anyone know how I can do this without creating a new account?	Broken513	1	280	Nov 8, 2015 by hotrod
	Hello. I'm new here and this is my story.... (Preview) I was abused both mentally and verbally by the woman who helped my dad raise me when I was younger. My mom left us when I was 3 and a half and this woman who was working for my dad offered to help him because he has his own business which is still open and dad couldn't always be home for my sister and me or take us t...	Captain Jigglypuff	5	608	Nov 8, 2015 by Debb
	Heartbroken again (Preview) What else would I expect really...talked to XABF for an hour and a half Today. He has moved on with someone he met at AA. I'm not going to talk about what I think of him and that situation becuase the venom will poison me. I will stick to myself. I'm hurt, devastated, sad, depressed, angry, as usual. I'm a fo...	OceanTide	4	518	Nov 7, 2015 by OceanTide
	What's the right way to raise your kid? (Preview) My son is almost one and his father is an alcoholic. I have been struggling with what's the right way to raise him. I would never want to watch my son suffer from this disease. It scares me. I don't know how active his father will be in his life so essentially it will just be me. Do I take out all alcohol fro...	123456abcdef	9	597	Nov 7, 2015 by Jerry F
	What To Do? (Preview) I haven't been coming here as much as I probably should or need to.I keep telling myself that my weekly f2f meeting,and that group of people 'should' be enough,that I need to just keep my focus on those meetings and reading the literature and working the steps in between,which I have been doing. It is no...	SoggySlippers	9	839	Nov 7, 2015 by hotrod
	"Dismissed.....Again" (Preview) Hello family - I'll try to be brief but am struggling to get over/beyond/through my most recent situation with one of my qualifiers. As you all know, my oldest had a new baby recently - 10/6. Before that, I was helping with G-Child 1 each Monday and Thursday evening while my son is at school and the baby m...	Iamhere	21	1202	Nov 7, 2015 by hiraeth
	I finally got the courage... (Preview) to leave my husband. I told him I wanted a divorce. After all of the legal trouble, emotional abuse, stealing, and lost jobs...I just can't do it anymore. I know it's the right choice, but I feel so broken right now. He is going to die if he doesn't get help. And I can't save him. I currently have no ide...	Bloodshotbetty	9	802	Nov 6, 2015 by Theoceancalls
	just so tired. . . (Preview) So I think it'S been about 3 weekS Since I found the pictureS of my huSband and hiS lateSt affair. I set a boundary said I'm done and want to divorce and he has spent every day since convincin. g me that I owe him yet another chance yes he's apologized and he's been kind and gracious and all of that kind while h...	Theoceancalls	6	614	Nov 6, 2015 by Mirandac
	Problems with AH sister (Preview) My sister has been sober for a few years now but has stopped going to meetings and working her program. We have a business together so need to have interaction. She used to apologize when she said something that hurt me. Since not working a program, she is mean. It seems I'm always defending myself...	Cindy1954	4	628	Nov 6, 2015 by hiraeth
	My old pup (Preview) Daisy, you can see her in my profile pic and attached. She's 18-19 years old, and been the best dog we ever could have hoped for, been here all my son's life. She's been healthy as a horse, he vet is continually amazed at her good health. She's a mutt we got at the humane society. We came originally for a d...	KennyFenderjazz	19	786	Nov 6, 2015 by Bethany66
	got sick, crawling my way back. (Preview) I am just starting back into alanon. I have been away way too long and lost all my serenity, centeredness and peace. I was involved and did the step work about six years ago. Didn't maintain it though. Now I am watching my grown daughter recover from a bad trip off pcp put in marijuana and I am married now to...	fortoday	4	627	Nov 6, 2015 by fortoday
	New lessons to learn each day (Preview) I was really struggling last night with my AH's drinking. I knew in my head that I should be able to detach, not let it get to me, don't engage, all the stuff I read about and hear about in Al-Anon. He isn't a mean drunk, he is more the needy, fishing for praise and attention, talkative and often know-it-a...	Bethany66	6	586	Nov 6, 2015 by milkwood
	less patient (Preview) As time drags on from deciding in done with this marriage, im finding ut harder and harder to go home, pkay nice and dake it. I feel my ah is manipulating me every step.of the way. HE had muktiple drunken sex encounters and was caught and yet serms entitled to still bully me and call the shots. He still refu...	Theoceancalls	4	644	Nov 6, 2015 by milkwood
	Faulty sense of self (Preview) Todays reading is about how we often have a faulty sense of self due to this disease we are all affected by. Our belief systems are often out of date, not based on facts, have little evidence and we seem to cling on to these beliefs as if its all we have got. Letting go of the negative self talk and belief syst...	el-cee	4	585	Nov 6, 2015 by andromeda
	Thought for Today ~ Suffering ~ 11/06/15 (Preview) No one really needs to suffer unhappiness and discontent or be deprived of the good things of life. We can find the way out by daily study of The Twelve Steps. This wholesome spiritual philosophy will help us find our way into the light of a good life. "I pray for the willingness to accept the diffi...	Debb	3	489	Nov 6, 2015 by hotrod
	Discouraging Cross Talk (Preview) I am a double winner. I have been sober for a long time in AA and just now realizing I have adult child issues. I am going to Alanon and ACA. When I am in an AA meeting and share my experience, after I share I often get cross-talked at in a subtle (but not so subtle) manipulative way that is meant to tear down or d...	WorkingThroughIt	25	3855	Nov 5, 2015 by tiredtonite
	Filed for divorce (Preview) Hello all, I filed for divorce from my AH. This was after many incidents of public intoxication, arrest, OWI, and many more, including losing his job. However, I am still so afraid. I have moved out of the house with the children (which I have sole custody of for now). I am so afraid he will take the childr...	runningwife	8	777	Nov 5, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	Goodnight! (Preview) So I'm struggling again. My next F2F meeting is Wednesday and my AH is actively drinking again. He just finished up probation on his 2nd DUI in 3 years and tonight was the worst he's been in awhile. I have my daughter here this evening so I was doing all I could do to keep him happy and not getting angry with m...	Hope2000	6	716	Nov 5, 2015 by SerenityRUS
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.