Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Joy2flow · Joy2flow

Good morning - my first post here - trying to wrap my head around my situation and not feeling like I'm getting very far. I'm scared and finding it hard to admit he is an AH. I'm angry - really angry that i'm having to deal with any of this. Is that normal? I think I still love my AH but at the same time I feel...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for January 6 reminds us that in between meetings we must keep in close touch with other Al-Anon members by telephone. Sharing Al-Anon recovery by telephone allows me to reach out to someone else and talk things over ton reason things out. .I must remember that the person I'm talki...

KT2015 · KT2015

I really like the just for today poem. I wrote it out and read it often. The part that really gets me is the part about "just for today I will take my luck as it comes and try to fit myself to it". It gets me because it wss such a forign concept to me. I've been waking up each morning and saying this to m...

mjferg · mjferg

As I sit here and type I am shaking,my granddaughter is telling the truth, she was molested.The family is coming together to support my daughter and my granddaughter,my heart is aching for my daughter,what a terrible thing to be betrayed like that by her husband,I can't imagine the pain.She is filin...

Carmel 15 · Carmel 15

My partner has now been out of rehab 3 weeks and I notice his behaviors are very similar as before he went in. He is not attending any meetings or seeing any workers just reading his workbooks he says and making statements he will never drink again as he is now cured of that he is 100% sure. He is going witho...

lounap23 · lounap23

My GF has been in AA and sober for about 19 days. Is it ok to tell her I am proud of her? Or is there a way to communicate that and be supportive to her?

redhead805 · redhead805

I'm very concerned with my live in boyfriends drinking and I feel like I'm at the end of my rope. He's 31 and has been drinking every day for the last ten years, most days around 30 drinks. I'm so sad and frustrated and I don't know what to do. I love him so much...I want to help him, but sometimes I don't kn...

mjferg · mjferg

Just when things seemed to be getting better I get the most shocking news.My granddaughter went to the police and told them her stepfather,my daughter's husband, has been molesting her since she was 10 years old!!!He has been arrested and his statement was released on the news,he said,"It may...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Christmas Day, as I mentioned, ended up being an ABF-free affair. I decided I didn't want to spend hours and $$ going to see his family, he felt I'd stopped him from seeing his family (although he could have gotten in the car with his brother...whom he lives with!!) and things were thus kind of strained b...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

i was sitting in my new but roach ridden apartment tonite and feeling so werid. its like 24 yrs of living with my xah justlike slammed shut,walled up and seems so strange now that im gone from the situation. i dont get any calls from my xah and it feels so unreal or surreal and that is a puzzling and sometime...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- and Happy New Year! I hope 2016 is off to a good start for everybody. Today's reading of a focus on our phrase: "... in Al-Anon we discover that no situation is really hopeless". Like the writer, the first time I heard that spoken at a meeting I thought, 'well of cours...

tortuga · tortuga

Dear MIP i have been off the boards for quite some time, for I discovered the spiritual path that works well for me, and I wanted to be in the present and maybe look into the future, thats why I didn't come back much here to share, for I needed to make peace with the past and be silent about it, i was so happy and...

Jazzie18 · Jazzie18

I lost it on my AH who has been sober for going on 7 months. Found a nip in his jacket pocket. I know I should have stopped and thought before reacting but it just pissed me off so much and I had to show it to him and ask him what this was. His immediate response was that he had been cleaning out the garage and f...

Rinn · Rinn

Also I have been telling my brother about alanon for years. He has seen this crazy change in me... ( you know peace and a one day at a time attitude.) Anyway he calls for advice sometimes and yesterday I told him you know you just need to accept your relationship (a healthy one, after being in an unhealthy...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I started my journey 30 years today! I am blessed to have stuck w/ the program! I don't know how many of you celebrate your recovery dates. I hope this post will make you remember when it was that you started your journey to wellness. This program works. My first meeting was very low-key. I had been to AA me...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Happy New Year to each of you within my MIP family. It's a new day in a new year and I am always grateful to be alive. There is something about a 'new start' that brings peace to me, and I am hoping to hold on to that one moment at a time, one day at a time. So, I thought - what better way to start a new year than a po...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for January 4 speaks about the tools of the program and haw simple. they can be. The reading talks about a person first coming into the program.,seeing everyone with some degree of serenity and asking how can I accomplish the same. The answer is; go to meetings, share when you can, work...

psychszsd · psychszsd

My fiance is titrating off of methadone. He has become very distant and disconnected, depressed and anxious. He seems to just want to do his own thing. I am very supportive but this is really wearing me down. I have been a cushion for him for over a year, never pushing too hard, but lately I'm always upset...

sunflowers271 · sunflowers271

Hi! I am a Pre-K teacher at a Private Center and was working my last day of 2015 on Wednesday, Dec. 29 when my sister called me in hysterics. I am well aware of her issue with alcoholism and how bad it has been for at least 6 weeks. She has had issues with substance abuse in the past and has been in rehab sever...

justme1900 · justme1900

I have been in and out of Alanon since I was 19 years old. More in than out thank God. Though I had a major relapse 5 years ago but got myself back into the rooms. I had relocated to a new state for a Job and started going back to Alanon face to face meetings and I just didn't feel comfortable at...

HopeForJoy · HopeForJoy

Hello. I like reading through forums. I feel much similar issues. I am so confused right now, My AH and I have many children together, he comes home almost drunk every night only to finish off till he fall asleep sitting up then wakes between 2-4 am to grab another beer. It is very strong IPA beers that he l...

Mattie · Mattie

I thought by now that I was an old-timer who knows the ropes. I also got off easy in the alcoholism department, if you call any of the insanity and chaos easy. But I mean that my A has always been a binge drinker, so there are periods of non-drinking in between the episodes, sometimes months long. And he'...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for January 3 suggests that we should take the time to realize that we are writing our life story with every single second of each day. It suggests that if we want to see the movie (of our life) move in a positive direction, maybe we need to make some changes. We can do nothing to chan...

Bethany66 · Bethany66

I know this is probably a medical question, but I am concerned. Lately my AH is twitching while he sleeps to the point that it keeps me awake. It seems to be shortly after consuming large quantities of alcohol and coming to bed. The tremors last only a second but I watch his body twitch and his hands cle...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

SPENT A WONDERFUL AFTERNOON WITH AN OLD FRIEND. FELT AT PEACE, SO HAPPY AND POSITIVE. FEEL TIRED BUT ENERGIZED. SO GOOD TO TALK FREELY AND FEEL ALIVE AGAIN :]

savannah7070 · savannah7070

Long story made short, I moved myself and our two preteen daughters out of our home last weekend because of AH and all the arguing when he drinks. We have been married 15 years and I am extremely codependent which allowed him to treat me like a doormat and a possession. He could always do whatever it was he...

joker · joker

I have been reading the messages on line and I have come to see I am in an emotional abusive relationship with ABF who is now 3 months sober and I am his cheerleader. I am the one that is there for him constantly, giving him encouragement due to my fear of not seeing him succeed. Its like I am the one holding it...

hotrod · hotrod

Courage to Change reading for January 2 points out that turning to the alcoholic for affection and support is like going to the hardware store for bread.. We may have an expectation that a good parents should nurture us and support our feelings or a loving spouse comfort us and hold us when we are afra...

joker · joker

I will do my best to explain how I feel. My ABF quit drinking 3 months ago and has become very distant emotionally, very self centered and changes plans constantly. My head is spinning not getting confirmation of what is going on with him. Maybe I am finally seeing who he really is now and its not what I wan...

catlover26 · catlover26

It is all so hard to explain how little things I can say to him can make him upset. He also has ptsd so any conflict between us he would rather just not talk about. Last night I just wanted us to sit on the couch together. We have talked about this before but for a few 'intimate' reasons he doesn't want to have r...

Hopefull15 · Hopefull15

Its been a couple of weeks since I last posted and as much as I hate to say it I feel like a broken record ....the on again off again merry go round...just gets exhaustng to the point that I dont even have to energy to get on the boards here or do even an online meeting. I swear every week its something differen...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I can't believe it! I am suffering from a head cold. Not a great way to celebrate...I even had plans for later today... I guess I will be down for awhile. Well...I went to bed earlier than expected. Didn't intend on staying up but life is funny... I woke up just after midnight... right after the firework...

Broken513 · Broken513

hotrod · hotrod

C2C reading for January 1 speaks about living in a society of instant gratification. Instant coffee instant money from the bank machine instant breakfast etc. It's everywhere we look. No wonder many of us arrived at Al-Anon looking for the instant answer to all our problems. Recovery is a process th...

John · John

A great video about being a parent, more specifically a mother and wife... a woman is speaking to her young daughter. I watched it and decided it would be a good fit here for people to watch. Hope you enjoy it. Reply and let me know what you think of it, how it effected you, etc. "How hard is it being a wife a...

mjferg · mjferg

Looking back at some of my posts it was quite a painful year,I shed a lot of tears,There were days the pain was so intense I didn't think I was going to survive it, But I did. I am discovering amazing things about myself,abilities I didn't even know I had.I am starting to really enjoy the changes that are co...

Heisenberg · Heisenberg

Hi all, I've posted once or twice before, but mostly just spend time as a reader here. Hoping others could help chime in on what I'm experiencing (I'm sure many have!) and provide some advice. So...long story short, I've finally made the split from my Fiancee (we own a home together, no kids) and I am sta...

Broken513 · Broken513

Good morning...Long time no write..lol... In the church, I was taught ...If everything is going well in your life, something is wrong.......I was also taught to cast all your worries on Him...which is Let go Let God......and in the last 4 1/2 months I have been doing this. I have also been taught to tru...

Fresh · Fresh

I am new to Al-Anon and I am confused by what my responsibility as the AH's Wife is supposed to be. He is currently at a treatment center. I have promised to stop drinking as well(not because I have a drinking problem but just for support)Well, my best friend and her husband are coming over tonight to spe...

hotrod · hotrod

The Courage to Change reading for December 31 speaks about the end of the year and suggests taking a few minutes to contemplate the progress that we have made.. It asks us to note what we did to contribute to our success. For example: we continue to attend meetings we've reached out to others for fello...

Thorn · Thorn

JADE is a concept I struggle with. I have made vast improvements in this area by minding my business and not encroaching on the decisions of my husband and my 2 20-something kids that live with us. This of course is confusing and sometimes infuriating my AH (sober 20+ years but no longer attends mtgs). M...

KT2015 · KT2015

My mom is not an alcoholic but lately I am struggling the most with my relationship with her. My mom raised me almost completely on her own. I lived with her full time and saw my dad on some weekends. We were extremely close. My mom has a mental illness she has struggled with my whole life. Two years a...

mjferg · mjferg

I have been struggling for quite some time now,struggling financially and emotionally. Life has been a real struggle this past year.I feel like I am in a little rowboat full of holes and i just keep patching the holes, I patch one and another one appears.I have way too many expenses for my income. So a co...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I suggest that no one stays up to ring in the new year unless you want to. I personally need the sleep. Won't go anywhere to celebrate. Sparkling cider & alcohol free egg nog. Maybe some nuts & light snacks. I am actually looking forward to the new year. Let go of the old year & bring in the new....

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for December 30 speaks about the negative things that other people say and do and how not to allow this to destroy our peace of mind. . It points out that we have" choices "and if we do not allow ourselves to respond to the negative words of a sick person, we will not be giving...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

So im grumpy from my cold and there is still lots to be done to whip this place into shape. i had the exterminaters come with no result so taking it in my own hands and intend to seal with caulk every crack and crevice in this whole place and set up with a resort of roach motels lol and attack directly with spra...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

How is everyone going to celebrate the new year? I am considering a very sober celebration of the new year 2016! I am even turning 50 this coming year. I hope you all can cope w/ or w/o the drinking in your loved ones lives. I am hopeful for all of you. I am so grateful that Christmas is over only because I can g...

hotrod · hotrod

Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! Step 12 has been posted to the Step Work Board.Please share your thoughts. Here is the link http://stepwork.active...

flovett270 · flovett270

I recently discovered that my finace's drinking problem stretches out more than just the weekend drinker...I found out he drinks alone mostly..... He says he is "Sick"when ever he really is just drunk or getting over a binge. He has been "sick "about every 4 or 5 weeks. I ju...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Things are not going smoothly at the moment and again boring boring details .. LOL .. I'm so detailed and yet I bore myself at the moment if that's not saying something I don't know what is. I self sabotage at a rate that boggles the mind, .. at the same time thins are not all bad, for that I am grateful. I'm r...

Millop · Millop

Hi all, i have posted once before on MIP and regularly hang out and read ESH from lots of the threads which I find invaluable to my own recovery! Oh gosh I need to share this to get it off my chest! My father and brother who have since passed due to alcohol related illnesses have left such an unhealthy fami...

CoopsMom · CoopsMom

Any suggestions, good slogans or quotes for dealing with my AH when he's just being unreasonable? He's been sober for a bit now, but his dry drunk is horrible (practically equal to the drunk guy at times). Just to give an example, our son is being watched this week by visiting relatives (daycare is clos...

joker · joker

I will give background information. I was 25 years old when I met my first husband. It was love at first sight! He physically abused me yet we got married. That lasted 7 months and he left December 1st. Never saw him again. We eventually got divorced. I saw issues with him. He could not hold down a job, and d...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Today's reading speaks to the idea of balance in our lives. The writer realizes that through program work he/she has become more able to be centered in HP's will. The need for control is released and balance is found. We are centered in the gift of serenity. I have just retur...

joker · joker

I have a disabled daughter that is 21 years old living with me. She has physio affective disorder. She stays in her room 24 hours a day and is not able to do anything for herself. I have to be her life line and help her with getting things she needs done. Its really stressful and I monitor her condition as wel...

Debb · Debb

Christmas at my mother and father's was interesting. Mom, by the end of our four hour visit, had polished off a half a bottle of wine and was truly out of control. 25 years ago she and her sister, the last of the siblings in the family, gave me my grandmother's wedding diamond, when she pasted away. I wa...

Daffypuck · Daffypuck

Without being long winded, til later, I have a question or two. My best friends wife, who is my best female friend, is an alcoholic. Before I go into details of why and whatnot, my big question is, what can my friend do legally to force her to get help. Her alcoholism is putting a huge strain on their marria...

JL969803 · JL969803

How do you ever learn to trust again when they have lied and manipulated for so long? Is trust even possible again? My AH says he wants to move forward and has admitted that he needs to get help, but after his last episode my anxiety raises everytime he's away from me. I wonder if he's up to something. I can'...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

caught a cold sunday. guess i was having too much fun lol today, i went through this poor me phase followed by anger followed by being p offed that xah woke me up at 1am to want me to make hotel reservations at a casino so he can drive drunk,got drunker,lose his money and get into more trouble in his unsured c...

atheos · atheos

"Recovery doesn't protect us from life. It enables us to live more fully and deal with life's problems as they arise." - Paths to Recovery I haven't been doing active step work for a few years -- I kind of stalled out after 5. I had some external excuses (moving a lot, didn't have a sponsor in my...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Newbie here - scared & angry (Preview) Good morning - my first post here - trying to wrap my head around my situation and not feeling like I'm getting very far. I'm scared and finding it hard to admit he is an AH. I'm angry - really angry that i'm having to deal with any of this. Is that normal? I think I still love my AH but at the same time I feel...	Joy2flow	11	710	Jan 6, 2016 by Taraxacum
	Courage to Change Reading 1-6-2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for January 6 reminds us that in between meetings we must keep in close touch with other Al-Anon members by telephone. Sharing Al-Anon recovery by telephone allows me to reach out to someone else and talk things over ton reason things out. .I must remember that the person I'm talki...	hotrod	2	600	Jan 6, 2016 by Taraxacum
	Taking my luck as it comes... (Preview) I really like the just for today poem. I wrote it out and read it often. The part that really gets me is the part about "just for today I will take my luck as it comes and try to fit myself to it". It gets me because it wss such a forign concept to me. I've been waking up each morning and saying this to m...	KT2015	7	796	Jan 6, 2016 by KennyFenderjazz
	its true (Preview) As I sit here and type I am shaking,my granddaughter is telling the truth, she was molested.The family is coming together to support my daughter and my granddaughter,my heart is aching for my daughter,what a terrible thing to be betrayed like that by her husband,I can't imagine the pain.She is filin...	mjferg	9	744	Jan 6, 2016 by Iamhere
	Partner out of rehab and behaviour appears the same (Preview) My partner has now been out of rehab 3 weeks and I notice his behaviors are very similar as before he went in. He is not attending any meetings or seeing any workers just reading his workbooks he says and making statements he will never drink again as he is now cured of that he is 100% sure. He is going witho...	Carmel 15	6	571	Jan 5, 2016 by hotrod
	New Here and have a simple question (Preview) My GF has been in AA and sober for about 19 days. Is it ok to tell her I am proud of her? Or is there a way to communicate that and be supportive to her?	lounap23	3	441	Jan 5, 2016 by lounap23
	Lonely and Worried (Preview) I'm very concerned with my live in boyfriends drinking and I feel like I'm at the end of my rope. He's 31 and has been drinking every day for the last ten years, most days around 30 drinks. I'm so sad and frustrated and I don't know what to do. I love him so much...I want to help him, but sometimes I don't kn...	redhead805	3	738	Jan 5, 2016 by CoopsMom
	I am devastated!!! (Preview) Just when things seemed to be getting better I get the most shocking news.My granddaughter went to the police and told them her stepfather,my daughter's husband, has been molesting her since she was 10 years old!!!He has been arrested and his statement was released on the news,he said,"It may...	mjferg	14	908	Jan 5, 2016 by KT2015
	I didn't let him eat his noodles. (Preview) Christmas Day, as I mentioned, ended up being an ABF-free affair. I decided I didn't want to spend hours and $$ going to see his family, he felt I'd stopped him from seeing his family (although he could have gotten in the car with his brother...whom he lives with!!) and things were thus kind of strained b...	missmeliss	16	891	Jan 5, 2016 by KT2015
	wondering (Preview) i was sitting in my new but roach ridden apartment tonite and feeling so werid. its like 24 yrs of living with my xah justlike slammed shut,walled up and seems so strange now that im gone from the situation. i dont get any calls from my xah and it feels so unreal or surreal and that is a puzzling and sometime...	YARNCRAZY	3	481	Jan 5, 2016 by Mike B
	Hope for Today Jan 5 (Preview) Good morning everyone- and Happy New Year! I hope 2016 is off to a good start for everybody. Today's reading of a focus on our phrase: "... in Al-Anon we discover that no situation is really hopeless". Like the writer, the first time I heard that spoken at a meeting I thought, 'well of cours...	yanksfan51	2	519	Jan 5, 2016 by Iamhere
	addiction (Preview) Dear MIP i have been off the boards for quite some time, for I discovered the spiritual path that works well for me, and I wanted to be in the present and maybe look into the future, thats why I didn't come back much here to share, for I needed to make peace with the past and be silent about it, i was so happy and...	tortuga	3	639	Jan 4, 2016 by Iamhere
	Flipped out (Preview) I lost it on my AH who has been sober for going on 7 months. Found a nip in his jacket pocket. I know I should have stopped and thought before reacting but it just pissed me off so much and I had to show it to him and ask him what this was. His immediate response was that he had been cleaning out the garage and f...	Jazzie18	6	979	Jan 4, 2016 by Mattie
	I am greatful and felt like sharing my story and happiness!!! I hope it encourages someone. (Preview) Also I have been telling my brother about alanon for years. He has seen this crazy change in me... ( you know peace and a one day at a time attitude.) Anyway he calls for advice sometimes and yesterday I told him you know you just need to accept your relationship (a healthy one, after being in an unhealthy...	Rinn	3	672	Jan 4, 2016 by KennyFenderjazz
	30 years today! (Preview) I started my journey 30 years today! I am blessed to have stuck w/ the program! I don't know how many of you celebrate your recovery dates. I hope this post will make you remember when it was that you started your journey to wellness. This program works. My first meeting was very low-key. I had been to AA me...	Hoot Nanny	4	517	Jan 4, 2016 by KennyFenderjazz
	Gratitude - It's more than a Feeling.... (Preview) Happy New Year to each of you within my MIP family. It's a new day in a new year and I am always grateful to be alive. There is something about a 'new start' that brings peace to me, and I am hoping to hold on to that one moment at a time, one day at a time. So, I thought - what better way to start a new year than a po...	Iamhere	13	680	Jan 4, 2016 by Rinn
	Courage to Change 1-4=2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for January 4 speaks about the tools of the program and haw simple. they can be. The reading talks about a person first coming into the program.,seeing everyone with some degree of serenity and asking how can I accomplish the same. The answer is; go to meetings, share when you can, work...	hotrod	2	463	Jan 4, 2016 by Debb
	Fiance titration from methadone (Preview) My fiance is titrating off of methadone. He has become very distant and disconnected, depressed and anxious. He seems to just want to do his own thing. I am very supportive but this is really wearing me down. I have been a cushion for him for over a year, never pushing too hard, but lately I'm always upset...	psychszsd	2	1805	Jan 4, 2016 by KennyFenderjazz
	I am new at this and it has been a heck of a New Year so far (Preview) Hi! I am a Pre-K teacher at a Private Center and was working my last day of 2015 on Wednesday, Dec. 29 when my sister called me in hysterics. I am well aware of her issue with alcoholism and how bad it has been for at least 6 weeks. She has had issues with substance abuse in the past and has been in rehab sever...	sunflowers271	4	479	Jan 3, 2016 by Iamhere
	Not feeling welcomed at a face to face meeting (Preview) I have been in and out of Alanon since I was 19 years old. More in than out thank God. Though I had a major relapse 5 years ago but got myself back into the rooms. I had relocated to a new state for a Job and started going back to Alanon face to face meetings and I just didn't feel comfortable at...	justme1900	9	733	Jan 3, 2016 by Iamhere
	Very unsure about the future. (Preview) Hello. I like reading through forums. I feel much similar issues. I am so confused right now, My AH and I have many children together, he comes home almost drunk every night only to finish off till he fall asleep sitting up then wakes between 2-4 am to grab another beer. It is very strong IPA beers that he l...	HopeForJoy	8	718	Jan 3, 2016 by Iamhere
	The craziness that keeps on giving (Preview) I thought by now that I was an old-timer who knows the ropes. I also got off easy in the alcoholism department, if you call any of the insanity and chaos easy. But I mean that my A has always been a binge drinker, so there are periods of non-drinking in between the episodes, sometimes months long. And he'...	Mattie	11	725	Jan 3, 2016 by YARNCRAZY
	Courage to Change 1-3 (Preview) The C2C reading for January 3 suggests that we should take the time to realize that we are writing our life story with every single second of each day. It suggests that if we want to see the movie (of our life) move in a positive direction, maybe we need to make some changes. We can do nothing to chan...	hotrod	2	544	Jan 3, 2016 by Iamhere
	Twitching while sleeping (Preview) I know this is probably a medical question, but I am concerned. Lately my AH is twitching while he sleeps to the point that it keeps me awake. It seems to be shortly after consuming large quantities of alcohol and coming to bed. The tremors last only a second but I watch his body twitch and his hands cle...	Bethany66	7	2164	Jan 3, 2016 by Iamhere
	WONDERFUL AFTERNOON (Preview) SPENT A WONDERFUL AFTERNOON WITH AN OLD FRIEND. FELT AT PEACE, SO HAPPY AND POSITIVE. FEEL TIRED BUT ENERGIZED. SO GOOD TO TALK FREELY AND FEEL ALIVE AGAIN :]	YARNCRAZY	3	344	Jan 2, 2016 by hotrod
	AH is having himself admitted to hospital to dry out...how will this help (Preview) Long story made short, I moved myself and our two preteen daughters out of our home last weekend because of AH and all the arguing when he drinks. We have been married 15 years and I am extremely codependent which allowed him to treat me like a doormat and a possession. He could always do whatever it was he...	savannah7070	14	820	Jan 2, 2016 by savannah7070
	another realization made (Preview) I have been reading the messages on line and I have come to see I am in an emotional abusive relationship with ABF who is now 3 months sober and I am his cheerleader. I am the one that is there for him constantly, giving him encouragement due to my fear of not seeing him succeed. Its like I am the one holding it...	joker	8	669	Jan 2, 2016 by missmeliss
	Courage to Change 1-2-2016 (Preview) Courage to Change reading for January 2 points out that turning to the alcoholic for affection and support is like going to the hardware store for bread.. We may have an expectation that a good parents should nurture us and support our feelings or a loving spouse comfort us and hold us when we are afra...	hotrod	3	2522	Jan 2, 2016 by Debb
	overthinking again (Preview) I will do my best to explain how I feel. My ABF quit drinking 3 months ago and has become very distant emotionally, very self centered and changes plans constantly. My head is spinning not getting confirmation of what is going on with him. Maybe I am finally seeing who he really is now and its not what I wan...	joker	4	781	Jan 2, 2016 by andromeda
	what Alcoholism has done to him (Preview) It is all so hard to explain how little things I can say to him can make him upset. He also has ptsd so any conflict between us he would rather just not talk about. Last night I just wanted us to sit on the couch together. We have talked about this before but for a few 'intimate' reasons he doesn't want to have r...	catlover26	5	671	Jan 2, 2016 by Iamhere
	Every week its something different... (Preview) Its been a couple of weeks since I last posted and as much as I hate to say it I feel like a broken record ....the on again off again merry go round...just gets exhaustng to the point that I dont even have to energy to get on the boards here or do even an online meeting. I swear every week its something differen...	Hopefull15	7	750	Jan 1, 2016 by Iamhere
	happy new year & i am sick... (Preview) I can't believe it! I am suffering from a head cold. Not a great way to celebrate...I even had plans for later today... I guess I will be down for awhile. Well...I went to bed earlier than expected. Didn't intend on staying up but life is funny... I woke up just after midnight... right after the firework...	Hoot Nanny	1	416	Jan 1, 2016 by Iamhere
	To all of my family here at MIP (Preview)	Broken513	4	434	Jan 1, 2016 by Debb
	Courage to Change Jan 1 (Preview) C2C reading for January 1 speaks about living in a society of instant gratification. Instant coffee instant money from the bank machine instant breakfast etc. It's everywhere we look. No wonder many of us arrived at Al-Anon looking for the instant answer to all our problems. Recovery is a process th...	hotrod	3	571	Jan 1, 2016 by Debb
	"How hard is it to be a wife and a mother?" (Preview) A great video about being a parent, more specifically a mother and wife... a woman is speaking to her young daughter. I watched it and decided it would be a good fit here for people to watch. Hope you enjoy it. Reply and let me know what you think of it, how it effected you, etc. "How hard is it being a wife a...	John	5	648	Jan 1, 2016 by Iamhere
	The New Year (Preview) Looking back at some of my posts it was quite a painful year,I shed a lot of tears,There were days the pain was so intense I didn't think I was going to survive it, But I did. I am discovering amazing things about myself,abilities I didn't even know I had.I am starting to really enjoy the changes that are co...	mjferg	6	620	Jan 1, 2016 by andromeda
	Breaking up with Alcoholic GF (Preview) Hi all, I've posted once or twice before, but mostly just spend time as a reader here. Hoping others could help chime in on what I'm experiencing (I'm sure many have!) and provide some advice. So...long story short, I've finally made the split from my Fiancee (we own a home together, no kids) and I am sta...	Heisenberg	7	869	Jan 1, 2016 by Heisenberg
	No expectations....and a little confused (Preview) Good morning...Long time no write..lol... In the church, I was taught ...If everything is going well in your life, something is wrong.......I was also taught to cast all your worries on Him...which is Let go Let God......and in the last 4 1/2 months I have been doing this. I have also been taught to tru...	Broken513	6	709	Dec 31, 2015 by Broken513
	New Year's Eve but (Preview) I am new to Al-Anon and I am confused by what my responsibility as the AH's Wife is supposed to be. He is currently at a treatment center. I have promised to stop drinking as well(not because I have a drinking problem but just for support)Well, my best friend and her husband are coming over tonight to spe...	Fresh	8	648	Dec 31, 2015 by Bethany66
	Courage to Change Reading 12-31 (Preview) The Courage to Change reading for December 31 speaks about the end of the year and suggests taking a few minutes to contemplate the progress that we have made.. It asks us to note what we did to contribute to our success. For example: we continue to attend meetings we've reached out to others for fello...	hotrod	2	714	Dec 31, 2015 by OceanTide
	If I explain am I controlling? (Preview) JADE is a concept I struggle with. I have made vast improvements in this area by minding my business and not encroaching on the decisions of my husband and my 2 20-something kids that live with us. This of course is confusing and sometimes infuriating my AH (sober 20+ years but no longer attends mtgs). M...	Thorn	5	761	Dec 31, 2015 by gingerfizz
	Struggling with relationship with Mom (Preview) My mom is not an alcoholic but lately I am struggling the most with my relationship with her. My mom raised me almost completely on her own. I lived with her full time and saw my dad on some weekends. We were extremely close. My mom has a mental illness she has struggled with my whole life. Two years a...	KT2015	4	617	Dec 31, 2015 by KT2015
	letting go,a real turning point (Preview) I have been struggling for quite some time now,struggling financially and emotionally. Life has been a real struggle this past year.I feel like I am in a little rowboat full of holes and i just keep patching the holes, I patch one and another one appears.I have way too many expenses for my income. So a co...	mjferg	9	805	Dec 31, 2015 by andromeda
	don't stay up... (Preview) I suggest that no one stays up to ring in the new year unless you want to. I personally need the sleep. Won't go anywhere to celebrate. Sparkling cider & alcohol free egg nog. Maybe some nuts & light snacks. I am actually looking forward to the new year. Let go of the old year & bring in the new....	Hoot Nanny	3	580	Dec 30, 2015 by Iamhere
	C2C reading 12-30 (Preview) The C2C reading for December 30 speaks about the negative things that other people say and do and how not to allow this to destroy our peace of mind. . It points out that we have" choices "and if we do not allow ourselves to respond to the negative words of a sick person, we will not be giving...	hotrod	4	474	Dec 30, 2015 by Iamhere
	A BIT BEWILDERED (Preview) So im grumpy from my cold and there is still lots to be done to whip this place into shape. i had the exterminaters come with no result so taking it in my own hands and intend to seal with caulk every crack and crevice in this whole place and set up with a resort of roach motels lol and attack directly with spra...	YARNCRAZY	2	634	Dec 30, 2015 by Iamhere
	celebrating the season (Preview) How is everyone going to celebrate the new year? I am considering a very sober celebration of the new year 2016! I am even turning 50 this coming year. I hope you all can cope w/ or w/o the drinking in your loved ones lives. I am hopeful for all of you. I am so grateful that Christmas is over only because I can g...	Hoot Nanny	7	631	Dec 30, 2015 by Thorn
	Step 12 (Preview) Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! Step 12 has been posted to the Step Work Board.Please share your thoughts. Here is the link http://stepwork.active...	hotrod	3	409	Dec 29, 2015 by Iamhere
	Just found out about my fiance's alcohol problem....I want to learn how to deal with this... (Preview) I recently discovered that my finace's drinking problem stretches out more than just the weekend drinker...I found out he drinks alone mostly..... He says he is "Sick"when ever he really is just drunk or getting over a binge. He has been "sick "about every 4 or 5 weeks. I ju...	flovett270	2	505	Dec 29, 2015 by Iamhere
	The Dancing Girl (Preview) Things are not going smoothly at the moment and again boring boring details .. LOL .. I'm so detailed and yet I bore myself at the moment if that's not saying something I don't know what is. I self sabotage at a rate that boggles the mind, .. at the same time thins are not all bad, for that I am grateful. I'm r...	SerenityRUS	2	656	Dec 29, 2015 by atheos
	Self doubt kicking in! (Preview) Hi all, i have posted once before on MIP and regularly hang out and read ESH from lots of the threads which I find invaluable to my own recovery! Oh gosh I need to share this to get it off my chest! My father and brother who have since passed due to alcohol related illnesses have left such an unhealthy fami...	Millop	4	562	Dec 29, 2015 by Iamhere
	Dealing with the unreasonable (Preview) Any suggestions, good slogans or quotes for dealing with my AH when he's just being unreasonable? He's been sober for a bit now, but his dry drunk is horrible (practically equal to the drunk guy at times). Just to give an example, our son is being watched this week by visiting relatives (daycare is clos...	CoopsMom	7	757	Dec 29, 2015 by maryjane
	Finally letting go (Preview) I will give background information. I was 25 years old when I met my first husband. It was love at first sight! He physically abused me yet we got married. That lasted 7 months and he left December 1st. Never saw him again. We eventually got divorced. I saw issues with him. He could not hold down a job, and d...	joker	4	495	Dec 29, 2015 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today dec 29 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Today's reading speaks to the idea of balance in our lives. The writer realizes that through program work he/she has become more able to be centered in HP's will. The need for control is released and balance is found. We are centered in the gift of serenity. I have just retur...	yanksfan51	3	494	Dec 29, 2015 by Iamhere
	feeling angry (Preview) I have a disabled daughter that is 21 years old living with me. She has physio affective disorder. She stays in her room 24 hours a day and is not able to do anything for herself. I have to be her life line and help her with getting things she needs done. Its really stressful and I monitor her condition as wel...	joker	3	650	Dec 29, 2015 by Debb
	Trying to accept & make sense (Preview) Christmas at my mother and father's was interesting. Mom, by the end of our four hour visit, had polished off a half a bottle of wine and was truly out of control. 25 years ago she and her sister, the last of the siblings in the family, gave me my grandmother's wedding diamond, when she pasted away. I wa...	Debb	6	697	Dec 29, 2015 by Debb
	New to ALANON and have a few questions (Preview) Without being long winded, til later, I have a question or two. My best friends wife, who is my best female friend, is an alcoholic. Before I go into details of why and whatnot, my big question is, what can my friend do legally to force her to get help. Her alcoholism is putting a huge strain on their marria...	Daffypuck	13	830	Dec 29, 2015 by Thorn
	coping suggestions? (Preview) How do you ever learn to trust again when they have lied and manipulated for so long? Is trust even possible again? My AH says he wants to move forward and has admitted that he needs to get help, but after his last episode my anxiety raises everytime he's away from me. I wonder if he's up to something. I can'...	JL969803	6	736	Dec 29, 2015 by KT2015
	COLD/MELTDOWN (Preview) caught a cold sunday. guess i was having too much fun lol today, i went through this poor me phase followed by anger followed by being p offed that xah woke me up at 1am to want me to make hotel reservations at a casino so he can drive drunk,got drunker,lose his money and get into more trouble in his unsured c...	YARNCRAZY	3	442	Dec 28, 2015 by YARNCRAZY
	I think I finally understand step 3 (Preview) "Recovery doesn't protect us from life. It enables us to live more fully and deal with life's problems as they arise." - Paths to Recovery I haven't been doing active step work for a few years -- I kind of stalled out after 5. I had some external excuses (moving a lot, didn't have a sponsor in my...	atheos	4	623	Dec 28, 2015 by Jerry F
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.