Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

lookingup · lookingup

I'm wondering if I'm getting these 2 confused,my feelings and gut feelings ,I e been told several times that my gut feelings were wrong,and I'd get mad but maybe their right,that's coming from my qualifiers they (my abf) at the time now my xabf Has said this to me that my gut was usually wrong .anybody kn...

ksmom80 · ksmom80

I'm using talk to text so I apologize in advance for any typos so I'm less than 12 hours away from facing the alcoholic and drug addict father of my two-year-old son I have PTSD from his emotional abuse and the flashbacks have been horrible all day I thought I had protected myself as well as my child by ente...

Jim521 · Jim521

Hi All, I`ve been browsing the forum for a while now and thought it would be good to sign up. I`ve been with my AOH for around 18 months now and through many ups and downs she is finally doing various stints in between relapses (just over 3 weeks currently. Shes currently in AA and seems to be going on a regul...

Fooled · Fooled

I always thought my mother and I were very close. We live in different states and we talked on the phone quite frequently until my AH hit his rock bottom. I called her the other day just to check in as she had been sick and she is almost 80 so sometimes I worry. The conversation was very cold on her end....

lookingup · lookingup

As you all know or most on here about my a/sister that Li Es here with me and in no program or gets any help,getting on with my story she decided to get off her 20 yr opioids addictions,on her own she says,I had told here that she couldn't do it on her own that she would need help,she says she had to detox hersel...

joker · joker

I wrote down all my fears about my abf drinking today and it was 2 pages of dread. I fear this..that would happen if the drinking does not stop. I am fearing for him, and not myself. He does not care about the fears I project. He just lives in the moment and drinks. Yet, here I am fearing this or that outcome fo...

Sonny123 · Sonny123

My brother has been an alcoholic for probably fourty years. He has many drunk driving violations and should probably be in jail for many years. I also believe he has mental illness. He is out on two separate bails and if found would definitely go to jail. He is in a remote location and now does not have a ca...

a4l · a4l

I no longer follow the urge to bang my head against them. My technical and legal husband is in our island of origin at the moment. we have a weird marriage. He lives and works in another state during the week and comes up on weekends. I tried to end it. He just ignored me and keeps coming back. More or less he...

Melmel69 · Melmel69

A few days ago my ex who I was with for 27 years died from complications of his acholisizm. I was hit so hard by his passing. I feel alone in my grief and overwhelmed. Has anyone else had this experience?????

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading discusses seeing ourselves as we truly are today, in time, vs. how we perhaps felt as we grew up. Many of us grew up with guilt and blame, amidst harsh criticism and constant fear. The writer discusses that even now, after years of recovery, past mistakes can come forward and reactio...

Asdfghjkl · Asdfghjkl

We're both in our early 30's, she's 18 months sober, we have successful careers and have been married for 1 year. It just so happens I work in a brewery and the resentment my wife shows towards me is getting to be detrimental to our marriage. Whenever I consume alcohol she gets angry with me. This leads to...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

I'm not sure whether I am expecting too much out of my sponsor or not but it seems every time I call her and I'm going through something that I need help with her response is "I'm sorry you are going through this, but this too shall pass, you just have to walk through it". I have told her that I want...

yippee1999 · yippee1999

Hi all. Attended my first meeting today. My sense is that attendees can talk out loud if they want, but that no one is supposed to give any feedback to others during a meeting...is that correct? I on the other hand feel that give and take...feedback...can be very helpful to others. For e.g., in toda...

likemyheart · likemyheart

And definitely handled much better because of the rock Al-Anon and my HP are in my life. Basics: Hospitalized for 8 days (barely remember 4 of them) with Gallstone Pancreatitis, poked by everyone, arms black and blue, home with incredible physical weakness I'd not experienced before, sent home to l...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I have to get this out of my mind. I had a nightmare this morning. It was about a close friend her husband. It was so real it makes me sick. The dream was about them breaking up due to cheating. I wasn't really there for her except hugs. Now this was a dream for sure but this could happen. I guess this is probabl...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading in the Courage to Change focuses on learning through our experiences. I am going to start with today's reminder - "Anything and everything about me can be used for my good. If I feel insecure or frightened today, I will remember that my fear is a signal that there is something for me to...

Stormyyoda · Stormyyoda

My husband is a drunk. He won't admit he has a problem but it is getting out of control. He seems to think he can handle it but once he starts there is no stopping him. I can't deal with it anymore. He rather drink then face life. Always threatening to leave me. How I make his lif bad. I have tried walking away a...

jocelgp · jocelgp

So there's a change in my husband's drinking habit. He doesn't go home in the wee hours, like a cinderella he's home by 12 mn and because the time is short, he was not able to drink as much. I thought I should be happy, i thought it was my husband's self determination... i learned that the reason for this is...

xirei · xirei

Hello, I'm new to Al-anon and I'm not sure if I'm 'doing it right'. I went to my first meeting a couple of weeks ago. Ironically, I grew up around AA meetings with my dad and step mom, and yet for some reason until a friend invited me to go with her Al-Anon had never even occured to me. Durp. Anyway - It seems l...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I figure I can get on here w nothing to do or say except I love you all. I have been having challenges but it is all good. Thanks for your support.

ItsAllAboutMeMC · ItsAllAboutMeMC

So I stopped going to my meetings a few months ago and stopped coming here. I was struggling very much with pulling away from my ABF and I felt like Al Anon was playing a part in that. So I detached from my program. Then I just felt gilt from that. I felt like I had betrayed myself and my Al Anon family from not...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

Since moving out onto my own for the first time ever, I have the confidence to be worthy, whole and own my time and space. I am amazed at how my life has changed when I dragged my sad miserable carcass into my first meeting a few years ago. My sponsor loved me until I really learned how to love myself. I have se...

Mommyof3 · Mommyof3

I have been married for 12 years. We have three children and I am concerned with what my children are seeing. My in-laws drink every evening after they get off of work. Overtime we have asked them to please not drink whenever they have the kids over. It always concerns me, what they are seeing. Are the gr...

Inga · Inga

Hello! I am finding here many that talk about their stupid boyfriends, etc. and I want to talk to you women having long term marriages like I have. Tell me: all about yourselves. I would very much like to know. Share with me please. I need to discuss my issues, but I am quite leary to share with someone...

el-cee · el-cee

Todays reading in C2C is one of my favourites. Its beautiful. It has such simple wisdom in it. It says 'I block my own well being each time I base my self worth on what I do or what others think of me' So true. I have identified one of my shortcomings as people pleasing and looking for validation of my worth fr...

Fooled · Fooled

I rounded out my birthday weekend with something that I love to do....yard work. Sunday was a day of weeding and moving plants, mowing the lawn. I went to a plant auction on Saturday and I got two things I have always wanted....a Crepe Myrtle tree and a weeping cherry tree. So Sunday was also a day of di...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Today's c2c speaks about loving and accepting ourselves. It suggests that even if we could make all of the people around us happy and "straighten them out" it would probably not increase our self esteem, in fact it probably makes it worse as we lose ourselves in the process of "sorting out" others. Th...

Iamhere · Iamhere

I am in Kansas so if any of you watch weather, you know that the middle of the country is under severe weather watches, warnings, complete with strong wind, heavy downpours, flash flooding and tornadoes!! So - it's Tuesday and Tuesday is softball night - 4 games each week. Well - nobody thought we woul...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Today's C2C addresses the denial many of us develop when living with the disease of alcoholism. It points out that even thog we may have been living for years with doubt, fear, chaos and all manner of unpleasant emotions and situations, we develop the habit of assuring everyone else, and ourselves th...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- The focus of today's reading is humility. There is a sentence on the page that says it all for me: 'Attempting to work the program has given me some humility.' Well ain't that the truth! I think once I started working on my recovery, one of the concepts I worked on accepting had t...

KT2015 · KT2015

Before Al Anon I was someone who stuffed her feelings down. I would ignore, push through and stuff down any bad feeling I had. I wasn't even aware of what I was feeling. Instead I was running around interpreting and being affected by other people's moods and feelings. Don't get me wrong I could neve...

AJR1983 · AJR1983

Hi there. I Googled this site on the recommendation from my mom. I currently an in a relationship and his drinking is affecting everything. He is depressed and the drinking makes it worse. Or maybe his drinking makes him depressed. I don't know how to handle it. Is this the place for me? I am not religiou...

Luke 1234 · Luke 1234

im new to this and want to go to meetings but I'm to scared. My head is going mental at the moment yet the person in my life with this illness she has hasn't picked up for over two weeks. I really need some help

vorpal · vorpal

Hi everyone, I have gained a great deal of strength from this board, and turn to posting tonight as a step in my own recovery, which has been going on for over 33 years. The last two months have been unrelenting. Two of my sisters have medical conditions that have required a great deal of time and attenti...

Changejones · Changejones

I am a 22 year old lady from the united kingdom and am very new to the programme / alanon, i have only been to 2 meetings. My mum is a recovering alcoholic of 10 years but it has left me completely destroyed and riddled with depression and anxiety which is completely ruining my relationship with my partner...

el-cee · el-cee

Ive been pondering this and thinking about what it was about my own journey that helped me commit to this program. I know that i reached a bottom, a place of utter hoplessness. I had finally run out of my own ideas and solutions, that were of course not solutions. I remember feeling like putting my hands u...

sweeetr · sweeetr

Life has been busy .. busy is good.. I have found you tube "hope and Healing 24/7" from alanon seminars... Oh my .. do I highly recommend them! I have the past year been doing so much personal growth .. my new "addiction" is audio books (being careful with this)... I came across these seminar recordings...

Fooled · Fooled

Today is my birthday. Its like the cold war here. AH is in a full relapse. There is no more slips, there is nothing but active drinking. Every day. He drives home that way from work-an hour. Last night he said he would be home at 730 so that I could go to my face to face, my children called me from thei...

hopeful987 · hopeful987

Is there anyone on here that is working through adjusting to life with a man who is working towards sobriety and is doing well (He started rehab April 2015 and relapsed twice, last relapse August 2015) AND at the same time also trying to not only forgive the alcohol but is having a harder time forgiving...

Truth · Truth

Well I do see now how when you decide to become self-aware (recognizing and feeling your feelings) how others get upset and try to get you to change back into what you formerly were doing. This past week I have been accused twice of overthinking things/acting too old/over analytical. The same two peop...

Mirandac · Mirandac

My dry A father has passed away, he had shock treatments to treat his disease years ago. He moved on and remarried And formed a new family. We were mostly forgotten, I have had a semi relationship with him Unlike the other Siblings. My step sister let me know he was sick then in a hospice facility, chec...

hotrod · Newbie

CheeezyNana Newbie Status: OnlinePosts: 2Date: 6m ago Permalink Reply Quote More Hi ! Several comments on the message boards indicate the importance of attending local Al Anon meetings. Are there ways to know that an Al Anon group is focused on Recovery? I have been a part of one local grou...

Doingmybest · Doingmybest

First, I'd like to apologize for asking a question for my RAH. He has, however, asked me to find out if there are any good AA meetings on Maui that he might attend while we are on vacation. We will be there for a few weeks at the end of this month and beginning of next month and he does not want to go that long wit...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

I AM STILL TRYING TO GET A JOB AND ALSO TRYING TO GET THIS DIVORCE DONE,ETC. xah IS COMING OUT OF REHAB SOON AND HIS SISTER HAS LIED TO ME ABOUT SERVING HIM THE DIVORCE PAPERS ETC. SHE IS IN EUROPE SO I HAVE TO WAIT TIL SHE GETS BACK. tHAT IS NOT WHAT I NEED YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT. mY NEW BOYFRIEND[4MTHS] ARE GETTI...

debvin22 · debvin22

Hello. I have neen reading the posts and it is helping some. I just recently told my alcoholic husband I wanted a divorce. He is a functioning alcoholic but it has started to affect his life more and more. He does not see the problem. Our kids who are older do see it along with others that are concerned. He h...

Rosemeyer · Rosemeyer

It's hard enough for me to understand, especially because AH was a dry drunk for 20 of the 43 years we were married. My only child who is 38 and has Down Syndrome, is a very capable and remarkably aware person. She can get her head around "disease" and (as we laughingly call it) "brain cloud". She had al...

gribouille2701 · gribouille2701

Hi everyone. I'm 34 and my mum is 59, she has been drinking for twenty years now. At first it was in the evening, then during the whole weekend and when she lost her job, it started in the morning too. These last years it got worse, to the point that last year we had to take her to hospital because of cirrhosi...

WhiskeyLullabye · WhiskeyLullabye

My bf hasn't had a drink in over 3 weeks. He's doing really well. He said he was done and so far, he's kept his word. How long should he be sober before I can start trusting him again? Still trying to figure out the job situation. On the bright side, I'm only $52 short on rent. Not sure where I'm gonna get...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for April 24 speaks about the slogan,"Easy Does it". It points out that many times we try to force solutions and end up being frustrated and disheartened in the process. If we use the slogan" Easy does it" ,it is interesting to observe the results. Life is more serene because I'm not p...

Jerry F · Jerry F

The last pearl to the necklace arrived at 7:00 something last evening and his name is Levi. He takes the character form of the other side of the family and not so much mine. That is how it has often come about for us as our family is multi-racial as so many pacific islanders are. He weighed in at 7 pound...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for April 23 speaks about being "shut down" and not feeling. The reading points out that as the result of living with this disease many of us have reached the point where we could experience life without being moved by it . This is a destructive tool that we developed as a result of livin...

jocelgp · jocelgp

I have to admit this has been a worry to me for a month now. He has been bringing up this topic, yes for a month now and the day is coming near, tomorrow! He has been bringing up the topic that he will be going out for a drink with his friends to celebrate his birthday. He is being nice like a kid waiting for hi...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Why is it that it seems that lots of people like to create controversy & lies then gossip about it? I am so sick of the media assuming things. IF I was in the position that some people are, I would be outraged. I am not a gossip generally speaking but I care about most people I talk about. I guess I can slip...

Fedora · Fedora

Hi everyone. I attended a counseling session today and my "homework" was to confront my AH about the booze under our bed. "Normal people do not keep bottles of booze under your bed", she said. "If he's going to drink, tell him that you know that, and he should do it in front of you. If it's all in secret, it...

Doves · Doves

This could apply to any of you as you deal with your alcoholic or even dry drunk, but what I'm about to tell you is about my teenage son (almost alcoholic, definitely a dry drunk in personality the last two years and weed smoker). Last night he didn't have to work at his part time job and of course went out w...

Bianca75 · Bianca75

I have only suspected my son is an alcoholic for maybe a month. He received the diagnosis on Tuesday. He's currently sober because we forced it on him..He says he doesn't want to be an alcoholic, but he acts like one every. I think you call that dry drunk. I can't express to you the depth of my pain right now...

Jen61 · Jen61

I joined MIP a little over 3 years ago. I have also been in face to face meetings with Al-Anon, AA and ACOA. None of this makes me a hero, but it does help me to understand why people become addicted, how it affects the whole family and how to survive.A year ago this July 14th I lost one of my best friends to C...

Gardening · Gardening

Hello all, So AH was doing good and now he has relapsed. I knew it was coming. He had a few drinks with friends multiple nights in a row. A glass of wine with dinner. And then a blow up. He is currently pouting because he got mad at me and said i dont believe him that he wasnt drunk. He now admits he was drunk bu...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Yeah I actually still ask that question? I am not going to do a poor me. I just want to throw out my garbage! Pity is not in my vocabulary. OK so I can be a whiner. So today I noticed nothing new but my Ah is pissy. He didn't know where I was after church & couldn't wait to pick me up so he again commented that h...

Bethany66 · Bethany66

My AH is on his second day of sickness after about a two week bender. It was a bad one this time with an average of a fifth of vodka or whiskey a day. I knew he would crash and burn at some point and it started Saturday morning. All day he was throwing up and had the shakes. He slept most of the day. Today he i...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Feelings versus intuition or gut feelings (Preview) I'm wondering if I'm getting these 2 confused,my feelings and gut feelings ,I e been told several times that my gut feelings were wrong,and I'd get mad but maybe their right,that's coming from my qualifiers they (my abf) at the time now my xabf Has said this to me that my gut was usually wrong .anybody kn...	lookingup	10	664	May 1, 2016 by SerenityRUS
	urgent child custody trial tomorrow (Preview) I'm using talk to text so I apologize in advance for any typos so I'm less than 12 hours away from facing the alcoholic and drug addict father of my two-year-old son I have PTSD from his emotional abuse and the flashbacks have been horrible all day I thought I had protected myself as well as my child by ente...	ksmom80	12	667	May 1, 2016 by SerenityRUS
	I`m new here (Preview) Hi All, I`ve been browsing the forum for a while now and thought it would be good to sign up. I`ve been with my AOH for around 18 months now and through many ups and downs she is finally doing various stints in between relapses (just over 3 weeks currently. Shes currently in AA and seems to be going on a regul...	Jim521	18	936	May 1, 2016 by Jim521
	Blindsided (Preview) I always thought my mother and I were very close. We live in different states and we talked on the phone quite frequently until my AH hit his rock bottom. I called her the other day just to check in as she had been sick and she is almost 80 so sometimes I worry. The conversation was very cold on her end....	Fooled	11	640	May 1, 2016 by hotrod
	Need help with this one (Preview) As you all know or most on here about my a/sister that Li Es here with me and in no program or gets any help,getting on with my story she decided to get off her 20 yr opioids addictions,on her own she says,I had told here that she couldn't do it on her own that she would need help,she says she had to detox hersel...	lookingup	7	610	May 1, 2016 by a4l
	Reacting to fear (Preview) I wrote down all my fears about my abf drinking today and it was 2 pages of dread. I fear this..that would happen if the drinking does not stop. I am fearing for him, and not myself. He does not care about the fears I project. He just lives in the moment and drinks. Yet, here I am fearing this or that outcome fo...	joker	6	551	Apr 30, 2016 by Jerry F
	New here Urgently Need Advice (Preview) My brother has been an alcoholic for probably fourty years. He has many drunk driving violations and should probably be in jail for many years. I also believe he has mental illness. He is out on two separate bails and if found would definitely go to jail. He is in a remote location and now does not have a ca...	Sonny123	18	586	Apr 30, 2016 by Sonny123
	when brick walls talk back (Preview) I no longer follow the urge to bang my head against them. My technical and legal husband is in our island of origin at the moment. we have a weird marriage. He lives and works in another state during the week and comes up on weekends. I tried to end it. He just ignored me and keeps coming back. More or less he...	a4l	4	650	Apr 29, 2016 by Jerry F
	Grief (Preview) A few days ago my ex who I was with for 27 years died from complications of his acholisizm. I was hit so hard by his passing. I feel alone in my grief and overwhelmed. Has anyone else had this experience?????	Melmel69	8	1230	Apr 29, 2016 by Bethany66
	Courage to Change (C2C) 4/29/16 (Preview) Today's reading discusses seeing ourselves as we truly are today, in time, vs. how we perhaps felt as we grew up. Many of us grew up with guilt and blame, amidst harsh criticism and constant fear. The writer discusses that even now, after years of recovery, past mistakes can come forward and reactio...	Iamhere	1	505	Apr 29, 2016 by hotrod
	My wife is in recovery and I work at a brewery (Preview) We're both in our early 30's, she's 18 months sober, we have successful careers and have been married for 1 year. It just so happens I work in a brewery and the resentment my wife shows towards me is getting to be detrimental to our marriage. Whenever I consume alcohol she gets angry with me. This leads to...	Asdfghjkl	7	572	Apr 29, 2016 by Fooled
	Sponsor question (Preview) I'm not sure whether I am expecting too much out of my sponsor or not but it seems every time I call her and I'm going through something that I need help with her response is "I'm sorry you are going through this, but this too shall pass, you just have to walk through it". I have told her that I want...	Mobirdie	8	658	Apr 29, 2016 by hotrod
	Attended my first ever meeting today...anyone here to answer some questions? (Preview) Hi all. Attended my first meeting today. My sense is that attendees can talk out loud if they want, but that no one is supposed to give any feedback to others during a meeting...is that correct? I on the other hand feel that give and take...feedback...can be very helpful to others. For e.g., in toda...	yippee1999	8	501	Apr 28, 2016 by Jerry F
	Illness and surgery (Preview) And definitely handled much better because of the rock Al-Anon and my HP are in my life. Basics: Hospitalized for 8 days (barely remember 4 of them) with Gallstone Pancreatitis, poked by everyone, arms black and blue, home with incredible physical weakness I'd not experienced before, sent home to l...	likemyheart	7	499	Apr 28, 2016 by Breakingfree
	dreams & infidelity (Preview) I have to get this out of my mind. I had a nightmare this morning. It was about a close friend her husband. It was so real it makes me sick. The dream was about them breaking up due to cheating. I wasn't really there for her except hugs. Now this was a dream for sure but this could happen. I guess this is probabl...	Hoot Nanny	3	1645	Apr 28, 2016 by Breakingfree
	Courage to Change (C2C) 4/28/16 (Preview) Today's reading in the Courage to Change focuses on learning through our experiences. I am going to start with today's reminder - "Anything and everything about me can be used for my good. If I feel insecure or frightened today, I will remember that my fear is a signal that there is something for me to...	Iamhere	4	590	Apr 28, 2016 by Iamhere
	Just can't take anymore (Preview) My husband is a drunk. He won't admit he has a problem but it is getting out of control. He seems to think he can handle it but once he starts there is no stopping him. I can't deal with it anymore. He rather drink then face life. Always threatening to leave me. How I make his lif bad. I have tried walking away a...	Stormyyoda	17	952	Apr 28, 2016 by Iamhere
	changes in my husband's drinking pattern.. i should be happy but i'm not... how do i process this? (Preview) So there's a change in my husband's drinking habit. He doesn't go home in the wee hours, like a cinderella he's home by 12 mn and because the time is short, he was not able to drink as much. I thought I should be happy, i thought it was my husband's self determination... i learned that the reason for this is...	jocelgp	12	675	Apr 28, 2016 by jocelgp
	Hi, I'm new here... (Preview) Hello, I'm new to Al-anon and I'm not sure if I'm 'doing it right'. I went to my first meeting a couple of weeks ago. Ironically, I grew up around AA meetings with my dad and step mom, and yet for some reason until a friend invited me to go with her Al-Anon had never even occured to me. Durp. Anyway - It seems l...	xirei	6	607	Apr 27, 2016 by xirei
	alone w nothing to do. (Preview) I figure I can get on here w nothing to do or say except I love you all. I have been having challenges but it is all good. Thanks for your support.	Hoot Nanny	4	407	Apr 27, 2016 by hotrod
	Have been gone for a bit (Preview) So I stopped going to my meetings a few months ago and stopped coming here. I was struggling very much with pulling away from my ABF and I felt like Al Anon was playing a part in that. So I detached from my program. Then I just felt gilt from that. I felt like I had betrayed myself and my Al Anon family from not...	ItsAllAboutMeMC	5	444	Apr 27, 2016 by hotrod
	What alanon has done for me thus far..... (Preview) Since moving out onto my own for the first time ever, I have the confidence to be worthy, whole and own my time and space. I am amazed at how my life has changed when I dragged my sad miserable carcass into my first meeting a few years ago. My sponsor loved me until I really learned how to love myself. I have se...	Breakingfree	13	685	Apr 27, 2016 by likemyheart
	Am I overreacting? (Preview) I have been married for 12 years. We have three children and I am concerned with what my children are seeing. My in-laws drink every evening after they get off of work. Overtime we have asked them to please not drink whenever they have the kids over. It always concerns me, what they are seeing. Are the gr...	Mommyof3	16	746	Apr 27, 2016 by Mattie
	Women of Long Term Marriages ( 1 2 ) (Preview) Hello! I am finding here many that talk about their stupid boyfriends, etc. and I want to talk to you women having long term marriages like I have. Tell me: all about yourselves. I would very much like to know. Share with me please. I need to discuss my issues, but I am quite leary to share with someone...	Inga	53	1623	Apr 27, 2016 by Hoot Nanny
	Self Love (Preview) Todays reading in C2C is one of my favourites. Its beautiful. It has such simple wisdom in it. It says 'I block my own well being each time I base my self worth on what I do or what others think of me' So true. I have identified one of my shortcomings as people pleasing and looking for validation of my worth fr...	el-cee	3	658	Apr 27, 2016 by Mirandac
	MUSCLE RUB NAZI (Preview) I rounded out my birthday weekend with something that I love to do....yard work. Sunday was a day of weeding and moving plants, mowing the lawn. I went to a plant auction on Saturday and I got two things I have always wanted....a Crepe Myrtle tree and a weeping cherry tree. So Sunday was also a day of di...	Fooled	18	2827	Apr 27, 2016 by Iamhere
	Courage To Change 27/4 (Preview) Today's c2c speaks about loving and accepting ourselves. It suggests that even if we could make all of the people around us happy and "straighten them out" it would probably not increase our self esteem, in fact it probably makes it worse as we lose ourselves in the process of "sorting out" others. Th...	missmeliss	2	478	Apr 27, 2016 by Iamhere
	Silly Silly Softball People (Preview) I am in Kansas so if any of you watch weather, you know that the middle of the country is under severe weather watches, warnings, complete with strong wind, heavy downpours, flash flooding and tornadoes!! So - it's Tuesday and Tuesday is softball night - 4 games each week. Well - nobody thought we woul...	Iamhere	3	502	Apr 27, 2016 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change 25/4 (Preview) Today's C2C addresses the denial many of us develop when living with the disease of alcoholism. It points out that even thog we may have been living for years with doubt, fear, chaos and all manner of unpleasant emotions and situations, we develop the habit of assuring everyone else, and ourselves th...	missmeliss	4	461	Apr 26, 2016 by Jennyp
	Hope for Today Apr 26 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- The focus of today's reading is humility. There is a sentence on the page that says it all for me: 'Attempting to work the program has given me some humility.' Well ain't that the truth! I think once I started working on my recovery, one of the concepts I worked on accepting had t...	yanksfan51	6	464	Apr 26, 2016 by sweetness34
	Feeling my feelings is hard (Preview) Before Al Anon I was someone who stuffed her feelings down. I would ignore, push through and stuff down any bad feeling I had. I wasn't even aware of what I was feeling. Instead I was running around interpreting and being affected by other people's moods and feelings. Don't get me wrong I could neve...	KT2015	6	2921	Apr 26, 2016 by KT2015
	Very new and lost (Preview) Hi there. I Googled this site on the recommendation from my mom. I currently an in a relationship and his drinking is affecting everything. He is depressed and the drinking makes it worse. Or maybe his drinking makes him depressed. I don't know how to handle it. Is this the place for me? I am not religiou...	AJR1983	8	502	Apr 26, 2016 by KennyFenderjazz
	Going out of my mind (Preview) im new to this and want to go to meetings but I'm to scared. My head is going mental at the moment yet the person in my life with this illness she has hasn't picked up for over two weeks. I really need some help	Luke 1234	11	708	Apr 26, 2016 by KT2015
	Acceptance in the middle of crisis (Preview) Hi everyone, I have gained a great deal of strength from this board, and turn to posting tonight as a step in my own recovery, which has been going on for over 33 years. The last two months have been unrelenting. Two of my sisters have medical conditions that have required a great deal of time and attenti...	vorpal	11	602	Apr 26, 2016 by Iamhere
	Very new to this - 2 alanon meetings along and struggling within myself, need some support (Preview) I am a 22 year old lady from the united kingdom and am very new to the programme / alanon, i have only been to 2 meetings. My mum is a recovering alcoholic of 10 years but it has left me completely destroyed and riddled with depression and anxiety which is completely ruining my relationship with my partner...	Changejones	8	560	Apr 26, 2016 by Changejones
	Is surrender vital? (Preview) Ive been pondering this and thinking about what it was about my own journey that helped me commit to this program. I know that i reached a bottom, a place of utter hoplessness. I had finally run out of my own ideas and solutions, that were of course not solutions. I remember feeling like putting my hands u...	el-cee	5	597	Apr 25, 2016 by Mirandac
	I have missed my friends here.. (Preview) Life has been busy .. busy is good.. I have found you tube "hope and Healing 24/7" from alanon seminars... Oh my .. do I highly recommend them! I have the past year been doing so much personal growth .. my new "addiction" is audio books (being careful with this)... I came across these seminar recordings...	sweeetr	2	2168	Apr 25, 2016 by Iamhere
	Kindness to myself (Preview) Today is my birthday. Its like the cold war here. AH is in a full relapse. There is no more slips, there is nothing but active drinking. Every day. He drives home that way from work-an hour. Last night he said he would be home at 730 so that I could go to my face to face, my children called me from thei...	Fooled	12	833	Apr 25, 2016 by lookingup
	Alcoholism and an Affair (Preview) Is there anyone on here that is working through adjusting to life with a man who is working towards sobriety and is doing well (He started rehab April 2015 and relapsed twice, last relapse August 2015) AND at the same time also trying to not only forgive the alcohol but is having a harder time forgiving...	hopeful987	8	1011	Apr 25, 2016 by Luke 1234
	Baby Steps (Preview) Well I do see now how when you decide to become self-aware (recognizing and feeling your feelings) how others get upset and try to get you to change back into what you formerly were doing. This past week I have been accused twice of overthinking things/acting too old/over analytical. The same two peop...	Truth	11	533	Apr 25, 2016 by Iamhere
	My father passed away (Preview) My dry A father has passed away, he had shock treatments to treat his disease years ago. He moved on and remarried And formed a new family. We were mostly forgotten, I have had a semi relationship with him Unlike the other Siblings. My step sister let me know he was sick then in a hospice facility, chec...	Mirandac	31	663	Apr 25, 2016 by Mirandac
	Moved this post by CheezyNana a new member from Sticky (Preview) CheeezyNana Newbie Status: OnlinePosts: 2Date: 6m ago Permalink Reply Quote More Hi ! Several comments on the message boards indicate the importance of attending local Al Anon meetings. Are there ways to know that an Al Anon group is focused on Recovery? I have been a part of one local grou...	hotrod	4	566	Apr 25, 2016 by Iamhere
	Question for Hawaii Double Winners or Maui Residents only please (Preview) First, I'd like to apologize for asking a question for my RAH. He has, however, asked me to find out if there are any good AA meetings on Maui that he might attend while we are on vacation. We will be there for a few weeks at the end of this month and beginning of next month and he does not want to go that long wit...	Doingmybest	3	2149	Apr 25, 2016 by Doingmybest
	NEED YOUR THOUGHTS (Preview) I AM STILL TRYING TO GET A JOB AND ALSO TRYING TO GET THIS DIVORCE DONE,ETC. xah IS COMING OUT OF REHAB SOON AND HIS SISTER HAS LIED TO ME ABOUT SERVING HIM THE DIVORCE PAPERS ETC. SHE IS IN EUROPE SO I HAVE TO WAIT TIL SHE GETS BACK. tHAT IS NOT WHAT I NEED YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT. mY NEW BOYFRIEND[4MTHS] ARE GETTI...	YARNCRAZY	5	469	Apr 25, 2016 by hotrod
	New here and just left alcoholic spouse of 18 years (Preview) Hello. I have neen reading the posts and it is helping some. I just recently told my alcoholic husband I wanted a divorce. He is a functioning alcoholic but it has started to affect his life more and more. He does not see the problem. Our kids who are older do see it along with others that are concerned. He h...	debvin22	7	572	Apr 24, 2016 by Iamhere
	Explaining alcoholism, detachment and forgiveness to a disabled Adult Child??? (Preview) It's hard enough for me to understand, especially because AH was a dry drunk for 20 of the 43 years we were married. My only child who is 38 and has Down Syndrome, is a very capable and remarkably aware person. She can get her head around "disease" and (as we laughingly call it) "brain cloud". She had al...	Rosemeyer	3	408	Apr 24, 2016 by Jerry F
	my mum is in danger and I don't know what to do and how to do it (Preview) Hi everyone. I'm 34 and my mum is 59, she has been drinking for twenty years now. At first it was in the evening, then during the whole weekend and when she lost her job, it started in the morning too. These last years it got worse, to the point that last year we had to take her to hospital because of cirrhosi...	gribouille2701	6	484	Apr 24, 2016 by Jerry F
	Wondering When? (Preview) My bf hasn't had a drink in over 3 weeks. He's doing really well. He said he was done and so far, he's kept his word. How long should he be sober before I can start trusting him again? Still trying to figure out the job situation. On the bright side, I'm only $52 short on rent. Not sure where I'm gonna get...	WhiskeyLullabye	11	564	Apr 24, 2016 by el-cee
	C2C 4-24-2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for April 24 speaks about the slogan,"Easy Does it". It points out that many times we try to force solutions and end up being frustrated and disheartened in the process. If we use the slogan" Easy does it" ,it is interesting to observe the results. Life is more serene because I'm not p...	hotrod	2	344	Apr 24, 2016 by missmeliss
	Levi is in the house.... (Preview) The last pearl to the necklace arrived at 7:00 something last evening and his name is Levi. He takes the character form of the other side of the family and not so much mine. That is how it has often come about for us as our family is multi-racial as so many pacific islanders are. He weighed in at 7 pound...	Jerry F	13	611	Apr 24, 2016 by Doingmybest
	C2C 4-23-2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for April 23 speaks about being "shut down" and not feeling. The reading points out that as the result of living with this disease many of us have reached the point where we could experience life without being moved by it . This is a destructive tool that we developed as a result of livin...	hotrod	6	709	Apr 24, 2016 by Truth
	it's my AH's birthday... HELP1 (Preview) I have to admit this has been a worry to me for a month now. He has been bringing up this topic, yes for a month now and the day is coming near, tomorrow! He has been bringing up the topic that he will be going out for a drink with his friends to celebrate his birthday. He is being nice like a kid waiting for hi...	jocelgp	9	586	Apr 23, 2016 by jocelgp
	contervesy, lies & gossip. (Preview) Why is it that it seems that lots of people like to create controversy & lies then gossip about it? I am so sick of the media assuming things. IF I was in the position that some people are, I would be outraged. I am not a gossip generally speaking but I care about most people I talk about. I guess I can slip...	Hoot Nanny	2	479	Apr 23, 2016 by Iamhere
	Enabler question, unrelated HP musing, and a question about books (Preview) Hi everyone. I attended a counseling session today and my "homework" was to confront my AH about the booze under our bed. "Normal people do not keep bottles of booze under your bed", she said. "If he's going to drink, tell him that you know that, and he should do it in front of you. If it's all in secret, it...	Fedora	4	584	Apr 23, 2016 by Jerry F
	My dog taught me a lesson in detachment (Preview) This could apply to any of you as you deal with your alcoholic or even dry drunk, but what I'm about to tell you is about my teenage son (almost alcoholic, definitely a dry drunk in personality the last two years and weed smoker). Last night he didn't have to work at his part time job and of course went out w...	Doves	2	755	Apr 23, 2016 by Hope4Healing
	Brand new to this (Preview) I have only suspected my son is an alcoholic for maybe a month. He received the diagnosis on Tuesday. He's currently sober because we forced it on him..He says he doesn't want to be an alcoholic, but he acts like one every. I think you call that dry drunk. I can't express to you the depth of my pain right now...	Bianca75	11	591	Apr 22, 2016 by Doves
	Just today... (Preview) I joined MIP a little over 3 years ago. I have also been in face to face meetings with Al-Anon, AA and ACOA. None of this makes me a hero, but it does help me to understand why people become addicted, how it affects the whole family and how to survive.A year ago this July 14th I lost one of my best friends to C...	Jen61	3	394	Apr 22, 2016 by Iamhere
	Reorganizing (Preview) Hello all, So AH was doing good and now he has relapsed. I knew it was coming. He had a few drinks with friends multiple nights in a row. A glass of wine with dinner. And then a blow up. He is currently pouting because he got mad at me and said i dont believe him that he wasnt drunk. He now admits he was drunk bu...	Gardening	7	454	Apr 22, 2016 by Bella0104
	why me? (Preview) Yeah I actually still ask that question? I am not going to do a poor me. I just want to throw out my garbage! Pity is not in my vocabulary. OK so I can be a whiner. So today I noticed nothing new but my Ah is pissy. He didn't know where I was after church & couldn't wait to pick me up so he again commented that h...	Hoot Nanny	5	522	Apr 22, 2016 by Bella0104
	Not sure what I am feeling...but it doesn't feel good (Preview) My AH is on his second day of sickness after about a two week bender. It was a bad one this time with an average of a fifth of vodka or whiskey a day. I knew he would crash and burn at some point and it started Saturday morning. All day he was throwing up and had the shakes. He slept most of the day. Today he i...	Bethany66	16	689	Apr 22, 2016 by lookingup
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.