Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

el-cee · el-cee

I'm spending a lot of time with a person I love. We're on holiday together. I love this person but this intensity is getting to me a bit. She's set in her ways and im trying to practice live and let live. She's negative. A really bleak outlook on life most of the time. I feel like I've got two options. My outlo...

Mare33 · Mare33

This is my first time on anything like this board, so please bare with me. I don't know how I found my way here, but here I am. Maybe God sent this forum my way for a reason. So here goes... Last September, I met a man whom I considered to be the man of my dreams. He was wonderful to me and treated me like a queen. H...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for July 9 about life being a package deal. We cannot simply choose the parcel we would like and avoid the rest . I know I tried to do this and thought that it was possible how disappointed I was as I did not succeed!!! The reading points out that living life by our own rules many of us adapt...

Kellygirl12 · Kellygirl12

I need some solid alanon advice. I was evicted from my apartment back in 2010 during the recession. I lost my job and couldn't find another one. My dad married a woman that doesn't like me so I wasn't allowed to move in with him. My mother left me with my dad when I was 14 so he was my only parent. A friend of my d...

Kellygirl12 · Kellygirl12

All of my coworkers are on Facebook and want me to join Facebook and friend them. I tell them I want my privacy and don't want to join. Also they keep asking me where I live and I tell them the town but they want to know exactly where I live. My one coworker dropped me off one day and I think she is telling other...

El · El

-- Editing Post -- So, I really am trying to not immediately take on the blame for people's moods and behaviors but it is my instinctual reaction. Yesterday I saw my next door neighbor and he is normally very talkative and usually runs over when he sees me. I had to say hi first and he glumly said hi and tha...

Steve · Steve

Hi Everyone, I've come across a number of posts pertaining to the alcoholic's cheating behavior, but have yet to see anything related to the partner's sexual transgressions. As my alcoholic wife's disease progressed, I became increasingly disgusted with her and her disease. As a result of her di...

Mcat54 · Mcat54

Hi, this is my first post. Working on living in the moment, doing the next right thing. Letting my HP guide me. I married my qualifier almost six years ago, aware of his drug and grass habits. A few months ago, I returned to al-anon as I was driving myself crazy with resentment and focusing too much on him....

KennyFenderjazz · KennyFenderjazz

Have a safe trip back to the wetlands! Maybe you will metamorphose there into JerryF! Kenny

lookingup · lookingup

While I've been searching for an apt,and going ahead and getting my boxes to start packin,and the goodbyes to long time freinds of 40 yrs ,that part is sad,but it's time now ,it's time for me to go ,make a change to the good and get into the apt living sit.no more yard work yay,.makes for a very short day whe...

lookingup · lookingup

I'm now finishing up my step 3 ?s ,this one ? Really had my stumped ,guess I've always wondered it ,.....here's the ? ......what can I do to see others through gods eyes? My answers was prayer,and serv work for others,and to acknowledge that they are only human with flaws like my own.....any add ons ? M...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading is all about one of our slogans/principles - One Day at A Time. The reading discusses nature, and how spiritual it can be when we stop and consider that it exists one moment and/or one day at a time. Trees do not sit around and worry about forest fires. Pond water doesn't fret over turb...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

After being let down yesterday for 2-3 hrs. My friend stepped up & spent lots of time w her. She forgot about me yesterday. She didn't call. I had to call her she laughed so I hung up. I will never tell her I did. By the way in a couple of weeks I am sharing my story at our local group. They are in for it. At lea...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's Courage to Change reading discusses how our outlook and attitudes are distorted by the disease, and how the program can offer us a new way to approach conflicts and issues. Most often, before our program, we looked at fault in every conflict and in every confrontation. We stewed over assig...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Today's c2c speaks of the self pity many of us feel when we first arrive at al-anon and the certainty that we have been hard done by. It reminds us that by asking ourselves what we have to give, rather than what we want to receive, such as by offering service in al-anon, we can find ourselves growing in self...

lookingup · lookingup

Ok,a/sister finally breaks the silence between us after 2 days,and 4 days since we fought like children ,she enters my bedroom with a pillow held to her front wineing that she may have to go to er for pain shot,that I fractured her rib,and also that she would be getting out of my home in 2 weeks,( that's mu...

Taraxacum · Taraxacum

I am on a vacation with my family of origin and I keep coming back to - "why did I think this was a good idea?" And "thank goodness I found alanon" I am trying to stay on my side of the street and just take care of myself. And I still feel some pressure to do things I don't want to do, and resentment is building. Ye...

Crau · Crau

This is where I am challenged the most. When big transitions happen in my life; the anxiety kicks in as the fear of letting go of something floods to the surface. I have had so many transitions this past year, some of my choosing and others not. I've tried to keep in control of what I could and let go of what I...

lookingup · lookingup

As lots know here me and my a/sis are having to separate from each other ,I want to blame it all on the desease ,anyway she says she can't wait to get out of my house,but I still don't believe her cause I made it way to easy for her to do what she wants ,she had it easy living here barely pay 200 a mth,included eve...

Kellygirl12 · Kellygirl12

I am new here. I have been estranged from my older alcoholic brother for over 10 years now because he is a violent alcoholic. My father told me that my brother's doctors told him he will be dead in two years if he keeps drinking. This diagnosis was over a year ago. My dad tells me he has been sober about a year...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

Im asking my pals here to devote 30 seconds of good vibes,prayers etc to me finding a job. It would sure help my Serenity. hugs ALYCE

pinkchip · pinkchip

I know this is a reality nearly all of us have to live with. I am on vacation now and was able to visit my parents. They are ok, but not functioning like they used to. It is hard seeing them get older but way better than the alternatives. The oddest part is me noticing them slipping. For so long it was ME alway...

deacon · deacon

We have not had any contact with our son( 36) for two months now. He is very angry with us that we told him we would no longer support him and his family because it was destroying us. We had supported them fully for two years at a distance and they lived with us for six months. And they gradually overstepped e...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Hi Folks

I'm currently on the 2nd last day of my amazing holiday in Broome. Honestly if my daughter didn't have school back in Melbourne I would get a job here and move into the backpackers hostel next door to our resort. It is just magical. I've never been anywhere that I have loved so much. Back home,...

lixxie6 · lixxie6

Hi all, I'm new here. I have been a member of Alanon for 15 months and usually attend at least two meetings per week, it is slowly but surely helping me come to terms with how out of control my life was/is. The alcoholic in my life is my ex partner who I broke up with for good in March this year. He is the love of m...

KT2015 · KT2015

The reading for today talks about how an AA speaker in an Al Anon group reminded them how desperately vulnerable the alcoholic is. He explains that deep down inside the Alcoholic knows how much trouble he is causing and is wide open to criticism. This means the Alcoholic is always on guard against at...

Kellygirl12 · Kellygirl12

I am shocked that in this day and age I am still judged for being 36 and never marrying. It is not a goal of mine. I am not sure why coworkers think that I need to be married by now. I don't understand it. I meet so many people in their 20s getting married and they think I am from another planet. How can I look at th...

RKTreats · RKTreats

My ABF was doing so well...78 days sober, the longest since I've know him...and last Wednesday he relapsed...just after I decided it was time for me to break things off...this crisis occurs. While I've handled it for the most part using my tools from Al-Anon...I have one question...I refuse to pur...

Jennyp · Jennyp

Had a good couple of weeks,relativly good behaviour as far as the binging goes. Until today. AH left on foot at around noon and just got home fairly intoxicated. Currently sitting on the deck with his AH pub friend loudly talking and I am sure irritating my neighbours. I am embarrassed although I know I...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for July 5 speaks about Detachment. It gives a very simple and clear explanation of this powerful tool and goes on the explain that Detachment is simply the freedom to own what is mine and to allow others the freedom to do the same. . It suggests that this freedom allows us to maintain o...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

good morning everyone- I apologize for today; I have been out of town for the Fourth of July weekend and traveled without my Hope for Today book. I hope everyone enjoyed the weekend and I will write again next Tuesday. Mary

Dkm3921 · Dkm3921

I've been in Alanon before. last summer I was really involved and worked the steps. But when I went back to college I kept making excuses and have ended up completely separated from it and struggling to get back in. I started noticing my dysfunctional behaviors with my boyfriend. We are long distance....

Kellygirl12 · Kellygirl12

I have mentioned that I don't like telling coworkers where I live. One of my coworkers dropped me off after work. I think she may have told my coworkers where I live. My question is that even if she told them where I live how do they know it is the correct address? I could have just had her drop me off in front o...

lgnutah · lgnutah

I am just not comfortable talking with people face to face. Which is why I have never been to a F2F meeting. I don't like talking on the phone either. "Talking" electronically (by email, text, in an online meeting room, or like on this message board works so well for me. I'm gueessing others feel that w...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

one of my faults is that i set too high expectations for myself and people i love. I try to reason with myself and lower them but dont succeed at it much. This leaves the recipient feeling less than and that he or she lacks something. Yet i go the other way too. I dont have enough confidence in myself and so i d...

Kellygirl12 · Kellygirl12

I have not been to any face to face alanon meetings in a long time now. Part of the reason has to do with me not wanting to walk so far at night. I realize that I can take a cab to and from the meetings and if I want to get better I need to take a cab to the meetings and make them a priority -- Edited by Kellygirl12 on M...

Kellygirl12 · Kellygirl12

Currently I am living in fear that if I make one more mistake at my job I will be fired. That is actually ridiculous to tell somebody because we all make mistakes. If this is how the company feels and how they operate then I just have to accept it if they decide to let me go. I personally know that I am doing the...

likemyheart · likemyheart

This August marks the fifth year I've been divorced and away from my ex-A; Last October was 5 years from when he left for the last time and I stumbled upon this board. Thank you John! I'd read somewhere that you should give yourself five years between relationships so that's what I did, put the whole ques...

missmeliss · missmeliss

So next weekend, for our birthday, His majesty and I had planned a weekend away and I was feeling worried as he has been drunk/irritable and has mentioned 50-60 times that he plans to "have a few drinks". Anyway since he has kept saying we can 'go wherever I want" I decided today that on the off-chance he...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Today's c2c speaks about tradition 3- "The relatives of alcoholics, when gathered together for mutual aid, may call themselves an Al-Anon Family Group, provided that, as a group, they have no other affiliation. The only requirement for membership is that there be a problem of alcoholism in a relat...

lookingup · lookingup

I'm already starting to feel some sadness coming on,for 53 yrs of loving my a/sister,and now seeing it all over with ,it's like this is just the beginning to a ending that's happening,unless she finds her recovery or gets help ,she has made fun of me so much for things I do in my morning routine of working...

missmeliss · missmeliss

We got in at around 1am on Friday night. The taxi ride home was kind of gruelling; my parents both got loaded on the plane. His majesty picked us up from the train station and I fell asleep pretty much as soon as we got home. I woke up and opened my suitcase to get out some clean clothes....I washed everythin...

Kellygirl12 · Kellygirl12

I have worked as an office temp for the last six years since I was laid off from my permanent job during the recession in 2010. People ask me why I don't get a permanent job. I tell them that I have seen permanent employees get let go after many years with companies so the word temp and permanent are intercha...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Real quick I have an ala non friend who I text daily & got me through a rough day. So much gratitude.

Frenchie78 · Frenchie78

I have so many beginnings of letters drafted in my head or on little scratch pieces of paper in the past five days. Trying to purge my emotions from my soul so that I can continue living my life and focusing on my goals. But each attempt is interrupted by Ive said that before, and the rope I am leading myself...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for July 3 speaks about being rigid and inflexible. It presents at story about a group that always started their meeting in a certain manner and that newcomers at this particular meeting were welcomed and tools shared. One night, the chairperson changed the format and many at th...

Anonymouskb · Anonymouskb

I haven't told anyone of the truth of my H's behavior. We've been married 2 years. We have his two kids full time(10 and 9) and we have a 4 month old baby. I feel desperately alone. I went to al anon meetings a year ago but haven't been able to because of newborn and work schedule. We live with his parents righ...

lookingup · lookingup

me and a/sister haven't been getting along for a while now,so I snapped and well she dont look to good ,no marks on me,she called the law hopeing to have me locked up,law hasn't got here but theres a law called castle doctrine that I have all rights to defend myself in y home she has only been a very over welc...

mellymoo · mellymoo

So, my husband's best friend is a terrible alcoholic. He has threatened me, he hurt my son last time he was over, and frankly, I'm not going to be an enabler anymore. My husband is also an alcoholic, and I am trying not to enable him either. Anyway, 4th of July is coming up, and this friend has come here ever...

hotrod · hotrod

C2C reading for July 2 speaks about our self destructive behavior. It points out that procrastination is one of those self-destructive behaviors.that hinders our growth and life. We develop this defect by living with the disease of alcoholism and It produces needless anxiety. Al-Anon can hel...

lookingup · lookingup

Hi everybody been missing everyone ,hope all is working out for y'all for we do deserve the best life has to offer,I've been hanging out in aca mip,room,there I have found a lot more about myself and still learning always will be learning ,so I'm trying to balance my alanon here and aca ,it can get overwh...

ThreeCmom · ThreeCmom

i'm new to the site and have only posted once before. I found out some detailed information about my cheating alcoholic husband (of 17 years) today and could really use some support. My AH left me & my kids a year ago for his current girlfriend and we are in the middle of a divorce. Since he left I have d...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's C2C reading discusses self-destructive thinking and how it blocks us in daily life and recovery. Most of us have spent way too much time feeling badly about who we are and what we have done. We may have been harshly criticized by others or we may have simply lost perspective and become overly...

kbanonymous · kbanonymous

I'm looking for a female sponsor. I'm not able to make it to meetings but would like someone that I can correspond with via email. Preferably someone who has had an alcoholic spouse and chosen to stay with them. Please respond to this post if you think you might be interested in being my sponsor. Even if o...

Family Members · Jazzie18

Wanted to get some opinions on those who have had talks with family members about them doing therapy or Al-Anon. This is my brother who is going through a really hard time and is so very angry with life in general. He is super stressed out and my sister in law thought that maybe I should have a talk with hi...

Anonymouskb · Anonymouskb

This is my first time posting here. My husband of 2 years is a functional alcoholic. We have his two kids full time And our newborn. I'm trying to figure out if is verbally/emotionally abusive. How can I tell? How do I know? how do i recover from how he treats me? At what point do you stand up and defend your...

el-cee · el-cee

I've lived with active drinking for almost 20 years with my ex and I've felt many of the usual things, resentment, anger, hopelessness, fear etc all the usual but right now this disease just has me sad. Plain sad. I don't feel the need to change, save, rescue, plead, beg, reason none of it. I don't feel an...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading is about prayer - it is not for our HP, but rather for us. There are no perfect words and there are no perfect times/ways to pray. Instead, we just need to try as our HP will know what is in our hearts. Today's Reminder is powerful enough to share ---- Prayer is my most personal form of com...

crazyhope · crazyhope

i cannot count all of the times that i have let go because i believe that it is necessary for my sanity. all i can do for my friend is pray. over and over. will this processes ever end? i simply cannot allow the love that i have for someone to destroy me. i know this. there's gotta be a way to get through t...

IAmStrong · IAmStrong

Hi, an old timer here. NavGrace in room. New intense problem. One of my adult children, ?A def with behaviour is abusive to his wife as reported to me by my Grandchildren. He has a strangle hold on them and my hubs and I. Sons bio Dad is the A and son is total enabler ie trading vehicles when Dad had a dui...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Give me tolerance please (Preview) I'm spending a lot of time with a person I love. We're on holiday together. I love this person but this intensity is getting to me a bit. She's set in her ways and im trying to practice live and let live. She's negative. A really bleak outlook on life most of the time. I feel like I've got two options. My outlo...	el-cee	4	937	Jul 9, 2016 by LinSC
	Absolutely devastated (Preview) This is my first time on anything like this board, so please bare with me. I don't know how I found my way here, but here I am. Maybe God sent this forum my way for a reason. So here goes... Last September, I met a man whom I considered to be the man of my dreams. He was wonderful to me and treated me like a queen. H...	Mare33	16	837	Jul 9, 2016 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change reading 7-9-2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for July 9 about life being a package deal. We cannot simply choose the parcel we would like and avoid the rest . I know I tried to do this and thought that it was possible how disappointed I was as I did not succeed!!! The reading points out that living life by our own rules many of us adapt...	hotrod	5	797	Jul 9, 2016 by El
	I don't know if I can forgive my dad for letting me be homeless (Preview) I need some solid alanon advice. I was evicted from my apartment back in 2010 during the recession. I lost my job and couldn't find another one. My dad married a woman that doesn't like me so I wasn't allowed to move in with him. My mother left me with my dad when I was 14 so he was my only parent. A friend of my d...	Kellygirl12	6	867	Jul 9, 2016 by Maresie
	I don't participate in social media and I guard my privacy and my coworkers don't like it! (Preview) All of my coworkers are on Facebook and want me to join Facebook and friend them. I tell them I want my privacy and don't want to join. Also they keep asking me where I live and I tell them the town but they want to know exactly where I live. My one coworker dropped me off one day and I think she is telling other...	Kellygirl12	11	985	Jul 9, 2016 by Maresie
	Q-tip (Preview) -- Editing Post -- So, I really am trying to not immediately take on the blame for people's moods and behaviors but it is my instinctual reaction. Yesterday I saw my next door neighbor and he is normally very talkative and usually runs over when he sees me. I had to say hi first and he glumly said hi and tha...	El	3	672	Jul 9, 2016 by SerenityRUS
	Has anyone cheated on their alcoholic partner? (Preview) Hi Everyone, I've come across a number of posts pertaining to the alcoholic's cheating behavior, but have yet to see anything related to the partner's sexual transgressions. As my alcoholic wife's disease progressed, I became increasingly disgusted with her and her disease. As a result of her di...	Steve	6	986	Jul 8, 2016 by BeingStill
	Pain and progress in the Program (Preview) Hi, this is my first post. Working on living in the moment, doing the next right thing. Letting my HP guide me. I married my qualifier almost six years ago, aware of his drug and grass habits. A few months ago, I returned to al-anon as I was driving myself crazy with resentment and focusing too much on him....	Mcat54	2	705	Jul 8, 2016 by hotrod
	Bon Voyage Reener! (Preview) Have a safe trip back to the wetlands! Maybe you will metamorphose there into JerryF! Kenny	KennyFenderjazz	1	522	Jul 8, 2016 by Iamhere
	Day went by fast (Preview) While I've been searching for an apt,and going ahead and getting my boxes to start packin,and the goodbyes to long time freinds of 40 yrs ,that part is sad,but it's time now ,it's time for me to go ,make a change to the good and get into the apt living sit.no more yard work yay,.makes for a very short day whe...	lookingup	11	717	Jul 8, 2016 by lookingup
	Step 3 (Preview) I'm now finishing up my step 3 ?s ,this one ? Really had my stumped ,guess I've always wondered it ,.....here's the ? ......what can I do to see others through gods eyes? My answers was prayer,and serv work for others,and to acknowledge that they are only human with flaws like my own.....any add ons ? M...	lookingup	1	507	Jul 8, 2016 by reener
	Courage to Change (C2C) 7/8/16 (Preview) Today's reading is all about one of our slogans/principles - One Day at A Time. The reading discusses nature, and how spiritual it can be when we stop and consider that it exists one moment and/or one day at a time. Trees do not sit around and worry about forest fires. Pond water doesn't fret over turb...	Iamhere	1	719	Jul 8, 2016 by hotrod
	al anon friend & me (Preview) After being let down yesterday for 2-3 hrs. My friend stepped up & spent lots of time w her. She forgot about me yesterday. She didn't call. I had to call her she laughed so I hung up. I will never tell her I did. By the way in a couple of weeks I am sharing my story at our local group. They are in for it. At lea...	Hoot Nanny	4	614	Jul 7, 2016 by Hoot Nanny
	Courage to Change (C2C) 7/7/16 (Preview) Today's Courage to Change reading discusses how our outlook and attitudes are distorted by the disease, and how the program can offer us a new way to approach conflicts and issues. Most often, before our program, we looked at fault in every conflict and in every confrontation. We stewed over assig...	Iamhere	2	702	Jul 7, 2016 by missmeliss
	Courage To Change 6/7 (Preview) Today's c2c speaks of the self pity many of us feel when we first arrive at al-anon and the certainty that we have been hard done by. It reminds us that by asking ourselves what we have to give, rather than what we want to receive, such as by offering service in al-anon, we can find ourselves growing in self...	missmeliss	2	763	Jul 6, 2016 by hotrod
	Unexcepted apologies (Preview) Ok,a/sister finally breaks the silence between us after 2 days,and 4 days since we fought like children ,she enters my bedroom with a pillow held to her front wineing that she may have to go to er for pain shot,that I fractured her rib,and also that she would be getting out of my home in 2 weeks,( that's mu...	lookingup	1	535	Jul 6, 2016 by hotrod
	Thankful for my family - even when they drive me nuts (Preview) I am on a vacation with my family of origin and I keep coming back to - "why did I think this was a good idea?" And "thank goodness I found alanon" I am trying to stay on my side of the street and just take care of myself. And I still feel some pressure to do things I don't want to do, and resentment is building. Ye...	Taraxacum	4	634	Jul 6, 2016 by lookingup
	Transitions (Preview) This is where I am challenged the most. When big transitions happen in my life; the anxiety kicks in as the fear of letting go of something floods to the surface. I have had so many transitions this past year, some of my choosing and others not. I've tried to keep in control of what I could and let go of what I...	Crau	4	678	Jul 6, 2016 by lookingup
	Updateing (Preview) As lots know here me and my a/sis are having to separate from each other ,I want to blame it all on the desease ,anyway she says she can't wait to get out of my house,but I still don't believe her cause I made it way to easy for her to do what she wants ,she had it easy living here barely pay 200 a mth,included eve...	lookingup	2	601	Jul 6, 2016 by lookingup
	My brother is 39 and facing possible death from alcoholism (Preview) I am new here. I have been estranged from my older alcoholic brother for over 10 years now because he is a violent alcoholic. My father told me that my brother's doctors told him he will be dead in two years if he keeps drinking. This diagnosis was over a year ago. My dad tells me he has been sober about a year...	Kellygirl12	6	3535	Jul 6, 2016 by reener
	Need Good Vibes (Preview) Im asking my pals here to devote 30 seconds of good vibes,prayers etc to me finding a job. It would sure help my Serenity. hugs ALYCE	YARNCRAZY	9	887	Jul 6, 2016 by Taraxacum
	Parents.... (Preview) I know this is a reality nearly all of us have to live with. I am on vacation now and was able to visit my parents. They are ok, but not functioning like they used to. It is hard seeing them get older but way better than the alternatives. The oddest part is me noticing them slipping. For so long it was ME alway...	pinkchip	8	763	Jul 5, 2016 by reener
	Watching our son self destruct (Preview) We have not had any contact with our son( 36) for two months now. He is very angry with us that we told him we would no longer support him and his family because it was destroying us. We had supported them fully for two years at a distance and they lived with us for six months. And they gradually overstepped e...	deacon	4	833	Jul 5, 2016 by reener
	Holiday snaps and musings :-) (Preview) Hi Folks I'm currently on the 2nd last day of my amazing holiday in Broome. Honestly if my daughter didn't have school back in Melbourne I would get a job here and move into the backpackers hostel next door to our resort. It is just magical. I've never been anywhere that I have loved so much. Back home,...	missmeliss	21	971	Jul 5, 2016 by 1911A1
	Moments of clarity (Preview) Hi all, I'm new here. I have been a member of Alanon for 15 months and usually attend at least two meetings per week, it is slowly but surely helping me come to terms with how out of control my life was/is. The alcoholic in my life is my ex partner who I broke up with for good in March this year. He is the love of m...	lixxie6	5	1016	Jul 5, 2016 by reener
	ODAT in Al Anon Reading July 5 (Preview) The reading for today talks about how an AA speaker in an Al Anon group reminded them how desperately vulnerable the alcoholic is. He explains that deep down inside the Alcoholic knows how much trouble he is causing and is wide open to criticism. This means the Alcoholic is always on guard against at...	KT2015	4	1048	Jul 5, 2016 by Bethany66
	People think I am really strange for being 36 and never marrying (Preview) I am shocked that in this day and age I am still judged for being 36 and never marrying. It is not a goal of mine. I am not sure why coworkers think that I need to be married by now. I don't understand it. I meet so many people in their 20s getting married and they think I am from another planet. How can I look at th...	Kellygirl12	3	724	Jul 5, 2016 by Cathyinaz
	78 days of sobriety...gone... (Preview) My ABF was doing so well...78 days sober, the longest since I've know him...and last Wednesday he relapsed...just after I decided it was time for me to break things off...this crisis occurs. While I've handled it for the most part using my tools from Al-Anon...I have one question...I refuse to pur...	RKTreats	6	3003	Jul 5, 2016 by tiredtonite
	Just when I think things were looking up.... (Preview) Had a good couple of weeks,relativly good behaviour as far as the binging goes. Until today. AH left on foot at around noon and just got home fairly intoxicated. Currently sitting on the deck with his AH pub friend loudly talking and I am sure irritating my neighbours. I am embarrassed although I know I...	Jennyp	5	735	Jul 5, 2016 by reener
	C2C Reading 7-5-2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for July 5 speaks about Detachment. It gives a very simple and clear explanation of this powerful tool and goes on the explain that Detachment is simply the freedom to own what is mine and to allow others the freedom to do the same. . It suggests that this freedom allows us to maintain o...	hotrod	2	695	Jul 5, 2016 by yanksfan51
	Hope for Today July 5 (Preview) good morning everyone- I apologize for today; I have been out of town for the Fourth of July weekend and traveled without my Hope for Today book. I hope everyone enjoyed the weekend and I will write again next Tuesday. Mary	yanksfan51	3	659	Jul 5, 2016 by Iamhere
	New here. My dad died from alcoholism. (Preview) I've been in Alanon before. last summer I was really involved and worked the steps. But when I went back to college I kept making excuses and have ended up completely separated from it and struggling to get back in. I started noticing my dysfunctional behaviors with my boyfriend. We are long distance....	Dkm3921	3	775	Jul 5, 2016 by Iamhere
	Fear of people knowing where I live (Preview) I have mentioned that I don't like telling coworkers where I live. One of my coworkers dropped me off after work. I think she may have told my coworkers where I live. My question is that even if she told them where I live how do they know it is the correct address? I could have just had her drop me off in front o...	Kellygirl12	0	621	Jul 4, 2016 by Kellygirl12
	Accepting who I am (Preview) I am just not comfortable talking with people face to face. Which is why I have never been to a F2F meeting. I don't like talking on the phone either. "Talking" electronically (by email, text, in an online meeting room, or like on this message board works so well for me. I'm gueessing others feel that w...	lgnutah	2	673	Jul 4, 2016 by Mirandac
	tOO many expectations (Preview) one of my faults is that i set too high expectations for myself and people i love. I try to reason with myself and lower them but dont succeed at it much. This leaves the recipient feeling less than and that he or she lacks something. Yet i go the other way too. I dont have enough confidence in myself and so i d...	YARNCRAZY	0	603	Jul 4, 2016 by YARNCRAZY
	Getting to face to face meetings (Preview) I have not been to any face to face alanon meetings in a long time now. Part of the reason has to do with me not wanting to walk so far at night. I realize that I can take a cab to and from the meetings and if I want to get better I need to take a cab to the meetings and make them a priority -- Edited by Kellygirl12 on M...	Kellygirl12	5	722	Jul 4, 2016 by Kellygirl12
	Living in fear is no way to live (Preview) Currently I am living in fear that if I make one more mistake at my job I will be fired. That is actually ridiculous to tell somebody because we all make mistakes. If this is how the company feels and how they operate then I just have to accept it if they decide to let me go. I personally know that I am doing the...	Kellygirl12	2	869	Jul 4, 2016 by Kellygirl12
	The gift of time (Preview) This August marks the fifth year I've been divorced and away from my ex-A; Last October was 5 years from when he left for the last time and I stumbled upon this board. Thank you John! I'd read somewhere that you should give yourself five years between relationships so that's what I did, put the whole ques...	likemyheart	3	667	Jul 4, 2016 by hotrod
	Solution found. (Preview) So next weekend, for our birthday, His majesty and I had planned a weekend away and I was feeling worried as he has been drunk/irritable and has mentioned 50-60 times that he plans to "have a few drinks". Anyway since he has kept saying we can 'go wherever I want" I decided today that on the off-chance he...	missmeliss	2	790	Jul 4, 2016 by hotrod
	Courage To Change 4/7 (Preview) Today's c2c speaks about tradition 3- "The relatives of alcoholics, when gathered together for mutual aid, may call themselves an Al-Anon Family Group, provided that, as a group, they have no other affiliation. The only requirement for membership is that there be a problem of alcoholism in a relat...	missmeliss	3	665	Jul 4, 2016 by hotrod
	Greiveing (Preview) I'm already starting to feel some sadness coming on,for 53 yrs of loving my a/sister,and now seeing it all over with ,it's like this is just the beginning to a ending that's happening,unless she finds her recovery or gets help ,she has made fun of me so much for things I do in my morning routine of working...	lookingup	6	700	Jul 4, 2016 by lookingup
	Home sweet home :-/ (Preview) We got in at around 1am on Friday night. The taxi ride home was kind of gruelling; my parents both got loaded on the plane. His majesty picked us up from the train station and I fell asleep pretty much as soon as we got home. I woke up and opened my suitcase to get out some clean clothes....I washed everythin...	missmeliss	6	933	Jul 3, 2016 by hotrod
	I'm being threatened to be fired I need some feedback (Preview) I have worked as an office temp for the last six years since I was laid off from my permanent job during the recession in 2010. People ask me why I don't get a permanent job. I tell them that I have seen permanent employees get let go after many years with companies so the word temp and permanent are intercha...	Kellygirl12	2	643	Jul 3, 2016 by hotrod
	long distance texting (Preview) Real quick I have an ala non friend who I text daily & got me through a rough day. So much gratitude.	Hoot Nanny	2	635	Jul 3, 2016 by hotrod
	First Post: Feelings emotions isolation writing (Preview) I have so many beginnings of letters drafted in my head or on little scratch pieces of paper in the past five days. Trying to purge my emotions from my soul so that I can continue living my life and focusing on my goals. But each attempt is interrupted by Ive said that before, and the rope I am leading myself...	Frenchie78	5	7342	Jul 3, 2016 by Hoot Nanny
	Courage to Change reading 7-3-2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for July 3 speaks about being rigid and inflexible. It presents at story about a group that always started their meeting in a certain manner and that newcomers at this particular meeting were welcomed and tools shared. One night, the chairperson changed the format and many at th...	hotrod	5	3306	Jul 3, 2016 by Enigmatic
	Alone (Preview) I haven't told anyone of the truth of my H's behavior. We've been married 2 years. We have his two kids full time(10 and 9) and we have a 4 month old baby. I feel desperately alone. I went to al anon meetings a year ago but haven't been able to because of newborn and work schedule. We live with his parents righ...	Anonymouskb	11	798	Jul 3, 2016 by reener
	Enough,finally had enough (Preview) me and a/sister haven't been getting along for a while now,so I snapped and well she dont look to good ,no marks on me,she called the law hopeing to have me locked up,law hasn't got here but theres a law called castle doctrine that I have all rights to defend myself in y home she has only been a very over welc...	lookingup	7	793	Jul 3, 2016 by lookingup
	Need some support asap (Preview) So, my husband's best friend is a terrible alcoholic. He has threatened me, he hurt my son last time he was over, and frankly, I'm not going to be an enabler anymore. My husband is also an alcoholic, and I am trying not to enable him either. Anyway, 4th of July is coming up, and this friend has come here ever...	mellymoo	14	951	Jul 3, 2016 by tiredtonite
	Courage to Change reading 7-2-2016 (Preview) C2C reading for July 2 speaks about our self destructive behavior. It points out that procrastination is one of those self-destructive behaviors.that hinders our growth and life. We develop this defect by living with the disease of alcoholism and It produces needless anxiety. Al-Anon can hel...	hotrod	3	1361	Jul 2, 2016 by Iamhere
	Update (Preview) Hi everybody been missing everyone ,hope all is working out for y'all for we do deserve the best life has to offer,I've been hanging out in aca mip,room,there I have found a lot more about myself and still learning always will be learning ,so I'm trying to balance my alanon here and aca ,it can get overwh...	lookingup	3	643	Jul 2, 2016 by Iamhere
	Cheating Alcoholic Husband (Preview) i'm new to the site and have only posted once before. I found out some detailed information about my cheating alcoholic husband (of 17 years) today and could really use some support. My AH left me & my kids a year ago for his current girlfriend and we are in the middle of a divorce. Since he left I have d...	ThreeCmom	4	1032	Jul 2, 2016 by Mirandac
	Courage to Change (C2C) 7/1/16 (Preview) Today's C2C reading discusses self-destructive thinking and how it blocks us in daily life and recovery. Most of us have spent way too much time feeling badly about who we are and what we have done. We may have been harshly criticized by others or we may have simply lost perspective and become overly...	Iamhere	4	734	Jul 1, 2016 by wp
	Need a Sponsor sponsor (Preview) I'm looking for a female sponsor. I'm not able to make it to meetings but would like someone that I can correspond with via email. Preferably someone who has had an alcoholic spouse and chosen to stay with them. Please respond to this post if you think you might be interested in being my sponsor. Even if o...	kbanonymous	12	9736	Jul 1, 2016 by Hoot Nanny
	Family Members (Preview) Wanted to get some opinions on those who have had talks with family members about them doing therapy or Al-Anon. This is my brother who is going through a really hard time and is so very angry with life in general. He is super stressed out and my sister in law thought that maybe I should have a talk with hi...	Jazzie18	6	702	Jul 1, 2016 by Jazzie18
	New Here. Married to an Alcoholic (Preview) This is my first time posting here. My husband of 2 years is a functional alcoholic. We have his two kids full time And our newborn. I'm trying to figure out if is verbally/emotionally abusive. How can I tell? How do I know? how do i recover from how he treats me? At what point do you stand up and defend your...	Anonymouskb	13	1032	Jul 1, 2016 by hotrod
	Just sad (Preview) I've lived with active drinking for almost 20 years with my ex and I've felt many of the usual things, resentment, anger, hopelessness, fear etc all the usual but right now this disease just has me sad. Plain sad. I don't feel the need to change, save, rescue, plead, beg, reason none of it. I don't feel an...	el-cee	34	1359	Jun 30, 2016 by thompfam
	Courage to Change (C2C) 6/30/2016 (Preview) Today's reading is about prayer - it is not for our HP, but rather for us. There are no perfect words and there are no perfect times/ways to pray. Instead, we just need to try as our HP will know what is in our hearts. Today's Reminder is powerful enough to share ---- Prayer is my most personal form of com...	Iamhere	5	760	Jun 30, 2016 by Iamhere
	letting go...it's a process...an over and over again process. why is it so hard? (Preview) i cannot count all of the times that i have let go because i believe that it is necessary for my sanity. all i can do for my friend is pray. over and over. will this processes ever end? i simply cannot allow the love that i have for someone to destroy me. i know this. there's gotta be a way to get through t...	crazyhope	2	726	Jun 30, 2016 by Iamhere
	At A Loss re Grandkids (Preview) Hi, an old timer here. NavGrace in room. New intense problem. One of my adult children, ?A def with behaviour is abusive to his wife as reported to me by my Grandchildren. He has a strangle hold on them and my hubs and I. Sons bio Dad is the A and son is total enabler ie trading vehicles when Dad had a dui...	IAmStrong	2	790	Jun 30, 2016 by Iamhere
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.