Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Searching Lady · Searching Lady

I'm new to this and need answers so here goes. My wife drinks everyday until she goes to bed. On work days she starts as soon as she gets home from work and on her days off she usually starts between 2-4 pm. She is high functioning and is not abusive but her personality changes and I don't like the drinking he...

terrygrace · terrygrace

I have attended many Alanon meetings in the past. I have also attended many OA and AA meetings. I can't say that I am a member of any 12 step program because I haven't had a sponsor in years and I haven't worked the steps for years. I have been in emotional and spiritual relapse for about 10 years now. Ever si...

gabigail · gabigail

My A lost her job this weekend. I have been relying on this income to pay bills. Now that medical bills are piling up, Im in over my head. I checked and saw that Im eligible for food stamps. I have a college degree, and used to work in my field. Now, Im doing what I did in high school and have lost myself an...

Nightingale · Nightingale

So last year my "sober" Abh started treatment for Hep C. It was a long year of really bad side affects and him being too sick to do anything....including work. He had been self employed so no disability. Anyway.....it was a Hugh strain but we got through it and thankfully it worked. The hep C is gone! On...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

reading JSHOLL,s post got me thinking about my own new relationship. When I was with the XAH the last 2 yrs id learn how to use Alanon to deal with fights and anger. It came to me that it was like my X was setting a fire in a way and i used to make it bigger by adding more fuel[ my reactions,bad language,threats...

andromeda · andromeda

I was reading a few blogs recently about love and codependency. I'm finally starting to learn that I can never really 'know' if someone loves me just because they say so or just because they act like they do. But, just because of this, it won't prevent me from risking and falling in love and giving love...

Jshollinger · Jshollinger

My h and I are stuck in a cycle. The next morning he is full of guilt. He says sorry, loves me, and becuase i am ready for normal, I accept his apology, fear if I don't it will just cause him animosity and reason to drink. So we sweep aside the issue. Kiss and make up.....lather...rinse.... repeat. I am not a...

Taraxacum · Taraxacum

At my f2f meeting on the 7th tradition, we had a really nice discussion of what it means to be self supporting. Someone shared about deciding to volunteer for an event and just doing it without anyone els's approval or hoping for someone to come along - self supporting our own desires and interests. I re...

LeahC · LeahC

It's been a few years since I have posted here. My husband went away to rehab to make amends to me and my 2 small children. It started out as a 30 day stay, I was excited that there was a half way program for him to stay in for transitional housing to get him used to being sober after rehab, and work the program,...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Today's reading is about how difficult it can be for those of us affected by alcoholism to communicate our ideas clearly and directly. The writer describes growing up in an alcoholic home and not being encouraged to share viewpoints. My case was slightly different but also...

Wiggity · Wiggity

A friend of mine is currently in treatment. She has one week left. I was SO happy when she finally agreed to go to treatment. This was after about three months of urging her to get help after watching her decline to the point of looking like Skeletor. She has been an alcoholic for years, but in the last...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Well I guess my birthday is not over. I am sitting @ the coffee shop where I have two gift certificates from two friends. I prefer to have tea. I have already treated one of my friends to coffee. I know that I will pass on more unselfish acts. Have a great Tuesday!

humm122988 · humm122988

Hello! I am new to al anon and have several questions. What do I do if there's not a meeting any where close to me? How do I locate the material for step work? Would you recommend me getting a sponsor immediately? Any and all info for a new person is greatly appreciated!

Charlotte22 · Charlotte22

Hi Everyone, I was in al anon for 10 years when I lived in New York and then I moved to Canada to a very small city and frankly the meetings had tons of cross talk and it did not feel safe for me. I have been in therapy and "white knuckling it" I am SO in need of RECOVERY!! My emotional recovery is in a bad spac...

Gina M · Gina M

I am new to Al-Anon. But it seems like a place that will help me be a better me. I have been verbally abused, controlled, and manipulated by an alcoholic for five and half years. We have been married almost 4 years. We have a beautiful son together. From another relationship, I have a daughter who is 16. Sh...

ThreeCmom · ThreeCmom

As a parent we all have fears, hopes and dreams for our children. As a parent with an alcoholic (soon to be ex) spouse, my fear has always been that one or all three of my children would follow the path of alcoholism/addiction like their father and his father. Today the reality that my 17 year old son is an a...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Just thought I would say HI to everyone. Having a good day! On the computer not on my tablet or cell phone. It is so much easier to type on here at the library.

missmeliss · missmeliss

Today's C2C talks about saying yes when we mean no, and how many of us, at the outset, have the wish to be able to speak up for our true desires but lack the courage to do so and so instead we agree to things we do not want and end up resentful and tired of our own relentless people pleasing. The reading suggest...

Aerin · Aerin

I notice a trend and hopefully others have experienced it so I don't think it is some fault in me. (not trying to be snobby, but I am a fit attractive social woman) My ABF (we are both 45 btw) has definitely decreased his drinking in the last 6months of our 4yrs together. He has I would say one or two slight sl...

likeaboss · likeaboss

Hi everyone, After twelve years with my AH, I've decided it's the best for both of us and our infant daughter to separate. The problem is that I can't get up the courage or put the proper words and thoughts together to actually talk to him about it. He's actively drinking right now (after being hospitali...

kadriliisa · kadriliisa

i have discovered in past that somehow i am attracting towards me only men who are needy and needs saving or something and not finding those normal healthy responsible men... so i am wondering how al anon might help to find healthy partner or friend... maybe some older members can share their esh.

Rollingstones248 · Rollingstones248

Hello I've been having trouble with my mother's drinking problems since I was probably 6 or 7. I never know what to do. she's been in therapy. she has a dui . In all honesty here I am just lost. I am depressed . I don't know what to do. Can somebody please help. She lashes out, she says horrible things my fam...

Hope floats · Hope floats

Just having a hard time trying to understand why I get upset at my Ah for going out with his Sponser every night to a meeting then going out after the meeting to get ice cream or dinner or go to see cars and not coming home until 11 at night . This all brings me back to the last time he was in recovery but the only t...

hotrod · hotrod

C2C reading for July 24 speaks about the 11th step. This is the Step where we pray for the knowledge of God's will and the power to carry it out. The reading points out that doing God's will doesn't mean that we perform heroic acts . It can simply mean we can be smelling a rose or washing the car or cleanin...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I was blessed to celebrate my 50th birthday w friend & family. My sister & bro in law drove about 900 miles just to be here for me. They surprised me. What a special visit! Some of my al anon friends helped greatly & did things for me that I had trouble doing for myself. Gifts & cards in abun...

helpless mom · helpless mom

Not sure where to start. My adult daughter has been to rehab 4 times. She has been an alcoholic since she was a teenager. She has been sober for the past couple of years but I fear she has relapsed Again. As a single woman, she socializes with drinkers. She seems to get along okay, then all of sudden she deci...

hotrod · hotrod

I hope you have a "Hoot" on your 50 th Birthday and that your party is filled with joy.

WorriedSick · WorriedSick

My brother (62) lives in KY. He lives with his girlfriend. About 2 months ago, she texted me asking me to get him out of her house as his drinking has become too much. In my calls to him over the past year, we have spoken much about his disease. Also, his drinking has become much worse. I did start looki...

Thinkngal · Thinkngal

hi everyone, new here but not to Alanon. I attend 2 ftf meetings a week but feeling low all the same and at tonight's step meeting I couldn't even share, the only time this has happened since I walked through the doors 20 years ago. Been married 46 years and of those years my hb who No longer drinks but uses l...

Fairlee · Fairlee

Hi strangers! I have been gone a while...summer is always so busy :) Nothing has changed in my situation. AH is actively drinking daily, all day, managing to work (self-employed) and still in deep denial that his alcoholism is hurting anyone other than himself. He admits he is an alcoholic. I guess th...

Melenzt13 · Melenzt13

Hi everyone, I'm new this forum and was seeking some advice and support. My husband is a recovering alcoholic for 7 years. I met him when he was 3 years sober. When we met, he discussed his sobriety saying he was comfortable with being around alcohol and others drinking. I was at the time, and still am, a s...

Rainy · Rainy

I finally left my alcoholic husband after 18 long years. What can I do now to repair the damage to my kids? My ex has been living out of state now for 4 years, and I have dated a little, but I shy away when someone gets seriousI don't want to be alone forever, but I also want to show my kids that we don't need anyo...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for July 23 speaks about discovering our sense of humor as we are working the Al-Anon program. It notes that when we first enter program we find it difficult to smile and could not understand the laughter at meetings. We saw life as tragic and serious. When we first learn to laugh at...

Maresie · Maresie

Last night after a long day at work 12 hours plus I took Uber home. I use the Uber pool option (in that I share the ride) Sure enough since it was late there was another person sharing the ride. I take Uber pretty often so I am used to sharing the ride. Most of the time the other person isn't an issue besid...

dazedandconfused · dazedandconfused

I have been dating a guy who I believe has an issue with alcohol. He will not admit he has a problem- other than admitting that he sometimes drinks too much. He drinks every day. I use to count and then I stopped because of how frustrated and upset it made me. I think he drinks anywhere between 4-8 drink...

lookingup · lookingup

I'm currently at my sons and his wife's for the weekend Im grateful for all they do for me and allow me to do for them in return,we have been having such a great time they want me to spend the weekend with them so I agreed,I've been having problems with my fb messenger being down for days now,and my fb Ive acci...

littlewing88 · littlewing88

Hi everyone,I'm new to this and seeking support. my SO is a recovering alcoholic, he's a great friend and a fellow book nerd and he's been doing really well, going to AA/therapy and all that. He relapsed recently and he tells me it's pretty bad this ...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading is all about keeping an open mind in the Al-Anon program, and forever placing principles above personalities. If you've been to an Al-Anon meeting, and stayed through the closing, you've most likely heard, "though you may not like all of us, you'll love us in a very special way - the s...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am a little anxious but excited. For some reason I couldn't reply to my last post. It was frustrating but I am OK. I will post tomorrow after the party. Just want to make sure I thank the ones that posted. I will keep your supportive comments in mind. Thanks to all of you for supporting me all these years. I...

LinSC · LinSC

Ive heard that alcoholics/addicts want to isolate their families. What is this about, what is the theory/idea of it? Why does it work? Linsc

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading is about Let Go and Let God! Before program, many of us thoughts others would cease to exist if we didn't help them, take care of them, lead them, etc. We often interfered in everyone's business and put our own needs to the side. We were willing to follow others around, clean up their m...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

OK so I am not in the moment projecting & making plans. I am so excited about my 50th birthday party. I hope that all this planning isn't too much for me. The party is on Saturday July 23rd. I have been planning for so long that it actually effected my sleep. I already have insomnia. But here is the kicke...

kadriliisa · kadriliisa

somehow after standing for myself and explaining myself to one of those moderators here why removing my posts from qouting older topics and forcing to start new topic of it, i discovered that my ip of my tablet is banned and i could not read this forum from my tablet....seriously does message of Al-An...

SDB · SDB

So my AH is back to actively drinking. I've been going to F2F Al-Anon meetings weekly for the last 7 months. My AH has been attending AA on and off since January as well. He went about 3 months without drinking and then there'd be a slip here and there. The slips are happening more frequently in the past few...

thedot1 · thedot1

I am a 18 year old kid feeling so many emotions. I have grown up in middle class suburban household with both my parents and a sibling a few years older than me. My "father" (I don't consider him my dad anymore, I will refer to him as Jason) is an alcoholic. My mom works part time and is a stay at home mom. Jason...

Mirandac · Mirandac

I am "thinking" of moving to west coast of florida. Getting a trailer in a 55 + park. My life here is starting to unfold and i see an opening up ahead. I plan on keep working but i would like to travel and rv it. I will be 60 this year. I like it out west a lot Too. My mother still looms over my head, thats a great...

El · El

I am very sad to see that over time it has become more and more difficult to get together with friends and family that we have hung with as couples or groups. My AH with enough alcohol becomes sarcastic and insulting especially to the women. In my confronting days I would frequently tell him that he just...

Lindaoakford · Lindaoakford

I am currently reading the complete ACOA source book by Woititz. I have ended up reading it not only wiht a pen in my hand, but a highlighter.... wow... I have notes and highlights and I have devoured half it in a week!!!!! Has this woman been following me around??? The chapter on the Myths is just ammaa...

kadriliisa · kadriliisa

Quite new here- but not new to al anon or acoa - and got into quoting answering into older topics what interested me and maybe possibly someone else in future and one moderstor deleted them....which is very rude ....in order to wasting MY time in future where are the rules to posting into older topic...

graceforlove · graceforlove

Hi, This is my first post to any addiction forum, but I would love some insight and perspective from others who are going through similar situations or have already been through these tough times. My husband is currently in rehab for his Oxycontin/Heroin addiction, and is 6 weeks in. This is his first...

missmeliss · missmeliss

So last weekend sir drinksalot took us out for our birthday and he was really pretty awesome. He kept himself nice, didn't drink a lot all weekend, and then went home with the obvious intent of getting hammered, which is not my business as long as he isn't doing it at my house. It was kind of a big deal as in 1...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Today's C2C speaks of joy, and how difficult it is for many of us to enjoy when it makes it's infrequent appearances in our lives. Many of us are desperate to cling on to happy moments when they come around- afraid they will be snatched away- and start obsessing over ways to 'freeze time" or make it a repea...

Getbacktome19 · Getbacktome19

So last night my husband came home angrier than ever. He would speak to noone and left after taking a shower. While he was gone a friend of ours stopped by and shared a secret he has been keeping since June. My husband cheated on me during a school trip with my son. I was instantly hurt and mad. I knew the mom a...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Just want to say that marriage is a roller coaster ride. Just for today I am finding the reconciliation process has been slow in coming. We have to work on ourselves & each other. Went to the ER on Saturday over very sensitive issues. I am recovering from that & stress caused by my lack of sleep....

lisad67 · lisad67

Our relationship is up and down and all around. When it is good it is everything i have ever wanted....but when it is not....well it is pure hell. Not only am i dealing with an alcoholic who i try to keep in a calm state of mind so he only drinks moderately for the day but i am up against his hateful crazy fa...

frogswim · frogswim

Any advice on how to tell my 10 and 7 year olds their dad is an alcoholic? We separated almost a year ago and he has been in a downward spiral ever since. He is now in a hospital after attempted suicide. They don't know anything and don't ask much about him as he wasn't able to stay sober to make the visits. I al...

Startanew86 · Startanew86

Long story short, I have been in recovery from alcohol for 9 years and also an adult child of an alcoholic. Recently, I met a member of Aa who went on to become a dear friend, someone I learned to trust which has been huge for me. Our friendship took a romantic path shortly after I discovered some repressed...

Anastasia · Anastasia

I find myself coming back.. Thank you again to all of you that offered service to me recently.. Following a day of quiet with my children yesterday I resolved my day by thinking about how I can change the things that are pressing at the moment. What is it that is causing me most frustration and why.. He...

Tivi123 · Tivi123

"One of the hardest decision you'll ever face in life is choosing whether to walk away or try harder." I feel the need to share my story with somebody who understands. I will try to make it as short as possible. Even though I am sure each of our stories could make a novel, if not a trilogy. I would appreci...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Today's reading is about the expectation we have that other people (or one other person) will be able to meet all of our needs-- without us even having to ask! It reminds me of the argument we have seen played out in sitcoms over the years: a couple is arguing and one (usually the ma...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Searching for answers (Preview) I'm new to this and need answers so here goes. My wife drinks everyday until she goes to bed. On work days she starts as soon as she gets home from work and on her days off she usually starts between 2-4 pm. She is high functioning and is not abusive but her personality changes and I don't like the drinking he...	Searching Lady	2	577	Jul 28, 2016 by Iamhere
	I've Been Trying to Do This Alone (Preview) I have attended many Alanon meetings in the past. I have also attended many OA and AA meetings. I can't say that I am a member of any 12 step program because I haven't had a sponsor in years and I haven't worked the steps for years. I have been in emotional and spiritual relapse for about 10 years now. Ever si...	terrygrace	8	635	Jul 28, 2016 by terrygrace
	Hitting rock bottom (Preview) My A lost her job this weekend. I have been relying on this income to pay bills. Now that medical bills are piling up, Im in over my head. I checked and saw that Im eligible for food stamps. I have a college degree, and used to work in my field. Now, Im doing what I did in high school and have lost myself an...	gabigail	19	1012	Jul 28, 2016 by Calm Lady
	Slug.... (Preview) So last year my "sober" Abh started treatment for Hep C. It was a long year of really bad side affects and him being too sick to do anything....including work. He had been self employed so no disability. Anyway.....it was a Hugh strain but we got through it and thankfully it worked. The hep C is gone! On...	Nightingale	4	562	Jul 27, 2016 by Iamhere
	RELATING (Preview) reading JSHOLL,s post got me thinking about my own new relationship. When I was with the XAH the last 2 yrs id learn how to use Alanon to deal with fights and anger. It came to me that it was like my X was setting a fire in a way and i used to make it bigger by adding more fuel[ my reactions,bad language,threats...	YARNCRAZY	3	500	Jul 27, 2016 by Jaclyn
	How to know if someone really loves you.... (Preview) I was reading a few blogs recently about love and codependency. I'm finally starting to learn that I can never really 'know' if someone loves me just because they say so or just because they act like they do. But, just because of this, it won't prevent me from risking and falling in love and giving love...	andromeda	14	3806	Jul 27, 2016 by hotrod
	How to stop sweeping (Preview) My h and I are stuck in a cycle. The next morning he is full of guilt. He says sorry, loves me, and becuase i am ready for normal, I accept his apology, fear if I don't it will just cause him animosity and reason to drink. So we sweep aside the issue. Kiss and make up.....lather...rinse.... repeat. I am not a...	Jshollinger	11	904	Jul 27, 2016 by KT2015
	Trying something new (Preview) At my f2f meeting on the 7th tradition, we had a really nice discussion of what it means to be self supporting. Someone shared about deciding to volunteer for an event and just doing it without anyone els's approval or hoping for someone to come along - self supporting our own desires and interests. I re...	Taraxacum	10	889	Jul 27, 2016 by Iamhere
	Heartbroken (Preview) It's been a few years since I have posted here. My husband went away to rehab to make amends to me and my 2 small children. It started out as a 30 day stay, I was excited that there was a half way program for him to stay in for transitional housing to get him used to being sober after rehab, and work the program,...	LeahC	9	769	Jul 27, 2016 by milkwood
	Hope for Today July 26 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Today's reading is about how difficult it can be for those of us affected by alcoholism to communicate our ideas clearly and directly. The writer describes growing up in an alcoholic home and not being encouraged to share viewpoints. My case was slightly different but also...	yanksfan51	8	955	Jul 27, 2016 by milkwood
	Having To Tough Love It... (Preview) A friend of mine is currently in treatment. She has one week left. I was SO happy when she finally agreed to go to treatment. This was after about three months of urging her to get help after watching her decline to the point of looking like Skeletor. She has been an alcoholic for years, but in the last...	Wiggity	14	1087	Jul 26, 2016 by Jerry F
	It is the gift... (Preview) Well I guess my birthday is not over. I am sitting @ the coffee shop where I have two gift certificates from two friends. I prefer to have tea. I have already treated one of my friends to coffee. I know that I will pass on more unselfish acts. Have a great Tuesday!	Hoot Nanny	1	466	Jul 26, 2016 by Iamhere
	New...lots of questions... (Preview) Hello! I am new to al anon and have several questions. What do I do if there's not a meeting any where close to me? How do I locate the material for step work? Would you recommend me getting a sponsor immediately? Any and all info for a new person is greatly appreciated!	humm122988	7	743	Jul 26, 2016 by Iamhere
	Help With Sick Elderly Alcoholic Father - Dying of liver disease (Preview) Hi Everyone, I was in al anon for 10 years when I lived in New York and then I moved to Canada to a very small city and frankly the meetings had tons of cross talk and it did not feel safe for me. I have been in therapy and "white knuckling it" I am SO in need of RECOVERY!! My emotional recovery is in a bad spac...	Charlotte22	10	2487	Jul 26, 2016 by Charlotte22
	Confused (Preview) I am new to Al-Anon. But it seems like a place that will help me be a better me. I have been verbally abused, controlled, and manipulated by an alcoholic for five and half years. We have been married almost 4 years. We have a beautiful son together. From another relationship, I have a daughter who is 16. Sh...	Gina M	3	551	Jul 26, 2016 by Jozie
	Trying to stay strong (Preview) As a parent we all have fears, hopes and dreams for our children. As a parent with an alcoholic (soon to be ex) spouse, my fear has always been that one or all three of my children would follow the path of alcoholism/addiction like their father and his father. Today the reality that my 17 year old son is an a...	ThreeCmom	7	717	Jul 26, 2016 by ThreeCmom
	just stopped by to say HI! (Preview) Just thought I would say HI to everyone. Having a good day! On the computer not on my tablet or cell phone. It is so much easier to type on here at the library.	Hoot Nanny	2	2288	Jul 25, 2016 by Mirandac
	Courage to Change 25/7 (Preview) Today's C2C talks about saying yes when we mean no, and how many of us, at the outset, have the wish to be able to speak up for our true desires but lack the courage to do so and so instead we agree to things we do not want and end up resentful and tired of our own relentless people pleasing. The reading suggest...	missmeliss	4	620	Jul 25, 2016 by Iamhere
	SEX & STUFF (Preview) I notice a trend and hopefully others have experienced it so I don't think it is some fault in me. (not trying to be snobby, but I am a fit attractive social woman) My ABF (we are both 45 btw) has definitely decreased his drinking in the last 6months of our 4yrs together. He has I would say one or two slight sl...	Aerin	7	860	Jul 25, 2016 by pinkchip
	Detaching with love and separating from AH (Preview) Hi everyone, After twelve years with my AH, I've decided it's the best for both of us and our infant daughter to separate. The problem is that I can't get up the courage or put the proper words and thoughts together to actually talk to him about it. He's actively drinking right now (after being hospitali...	likeaboss	7	933	Jul 25, 2016 by SDB
	how al anon has helped you to find healthy partner friend? (Preview) i have discovered in past that somehow i am attracting towards me only men who are needy and needs saving or something and not finding those normal healthy responsible men... so i am wondering how al anon might help to find healthy partner or friend... maybe some older members can share their esh.	kadriliisa	11	852	Jul 25, 2016 by Bethany66
	Child needing help with mother (Preview) Hello I've been having trouble with my mother's drinking problems since I was probably 6 or 7. I never know what to do. she's been in therapy. she has a dui . In all honesty here I am just lost. I am depressed . I don't know what to do. Can somebody please help. She lashes out, she says horrible things my fam...	Rollingstones248	3	694	Jul 25, 2016 by Iamhere
	Do patterns ever change (Preview) Just having a hard time trying to understand why I get upset at my Ah for going out with his Sponser every night to a meeting then going out after the meeting to get ice cream or dinner or go to see cars and not coming home until 11 at night . This all brings me back to the last time he was in recovery but the only t...	Hope floats	5	906	Jul 24, 2016 by Jerry F
	Courage to Change reading for 7-24-2016 (Preview) C2C reading for July 24 speaks about the 11th step. This is the Step where we pray for the knowledge of God's will and the power to carry it out. The reading points out that doing God's will doesn't mean that we perform heroic acts . It can simply mean we can be smelling a rose or washing the car or cleanin...	hotrod	2	3104	Jul 24, 2016 by Charlotte22
	party was a blast! (Preview) I was blessed to celebrate my 50th birthday w friend & family. My sister & bro in law drove about 900 miles just to be here for me. They surprised me. What a special visit! Some of my al anon friends helped greatly & did things for me that I had trouble doing for myself. Gifts & cards in abun...	Hoot Nanny	4	706	Jul 24, 2016 by Mirandac
	Possible relapse (Preview) Not sure where to start. My adult daughter has been to rehab 4 times. She has been an alcoholic since she was a teenager. She has been sober for the past couple of years but I fear she has relapsed Again. As a single woman, she socializes with drinkers. She seems to get along okay, then all of sudden she deci...	helpless mom	5	677	Jul 24, 2016 by pinkchip
	Happy Birthday Kathleen (Preview) I hope you have a "Hoot" on your 50 th Birthday and that your party is filled with joy.	hotrod	8	863	Jul 24, 2016 by KennyFenderjazz
	Not sure how to help brother who is 1000 miles away (Preview) My brother (62) lives in KY. He lives with his girlfriend. About 2 months ago, she texted me asking me to get him out of her house as his drinking has become too much. In my calls to him over the past year, we have spoken much about his disease. Also, his drinking has become much worse. I did start looki...	WorriedSick	11	779	Jul 24, 2016 by Maresie
	Feeling low after 20 years of alanon recovery (Preview) hi everyone, new here but not to Alanon. I attend 2 ftf meetings a week but feeling low all the same and at tonight's step meeting I couldn't even share, the only time this has happened since I walked through the doors 20 years ago. Been married 46 years and of those years my hb who No longer drinks but uses l...	Thinkngal	6	907	Jul 24, 2016 by Thinkngal
	Words are a joke and the joke's on me (Preview) Hi strangers! I have been gone a while...summer is always so busy :) Nothing has changed in my situation. AH is actively drinking daily, all day, managing to work (self-employed) and still in deep denial that his alcoholism is hurting anyone other than himself. He admits he is an alcoholic. I guess th...	Fairlee	12	893	Jul 23, 2016 by Aerin
	New and looking for support (Preview) Hi everyone, I'm new this forum and was seeking some advice and support. My husband is a recovering alcoholic for 7 years. I met him when he was 3 years sober. When we met, he discussed his sobriety saying he was comfortable with being around alcohol and others drinking. I was at the time, and still am, a s...	Melenzt13	7	813	Jul 23, 2016 by Mirandac
	healthy kids after an alcoholic dad? (Preview) I finally left my alcoholic husband after 18 long years. What can I do now to repair the damage to my kids? My ex has been living out of state now for 4 years, and I have dated a little, but I shy away when someone gets seriousI don't want to be alone forever, but I also want to show my kids that we don't need anyo...	Rainy	7	769	Jul 23, 2016 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change Reading 7-23-2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for July 23 speaks about discovering our sense of humor as we are working the Al-Anon program. It notes that when we first enter program we find it difficult to smile and could not understand the laughter at meetings. We saw life as tragic and serious. When we first learn to laugh at...	hotrod	2	672	Jul 23, 2016 by Iamhere
	Dumbfounded (Preview) Last night after a long day at work 12 hours plus I took Uber home. I use the Uber pool option (in that I share the ride) Sure enough since it was late there was another person sharing the ride. I take Uber pretty often so I am used to sharing the ride. Most of the time the other person isn't an issue besid...	Maresie	2	515	Jul 23, 2016 by Maresie
	Trying to remain strong (Preview) I have been dating a guy who I believe has an issue with alcohol. He will not admit he has a problem- other than admitting that he sometimes drinks too much. He drinks every day. I use to count and then I stopped because of how frustrated and upset it made me. I think he drinks anywhere between 4-8 drink...	dazedandconfused	5	877	Jul 23, 2016 by Mattie
	Visiting son n wife (Preview) I'm currently at my sons and his wife's for the weekend Im grateful for all they do for me and allow me to do for them in return,we have been having such a great time they want me to spend the weekend with them so I agreed,I've been having problems with my fb messenger being down for days now,and my fb Ive acci...	lookingup	2	603	Jul 23, 2016 by lookingup
	newcomer seeking support with SO significant other relapse support (Preview) Hi everyone,I'm new to this and seeking support. my SO is a recovering alcoholic, he's a great friend and a fellow book nerd and he's been doing really well, going to AA/therapy and all that. He relapsed recently and he tells me it's pretty bad this ...	littlewing88	2	6685	Jul 22, 2016 by hotrod
	Courage to Change (C2C) 7/22/16 (Preview) Today's reading is all about keeping an open mind in the Al-Anon program, and forever placing principles above personalities. If you've been to an Al-Anon meeting, and stayed through the closing, you've most likely heard, "though you may not like all of us, you'll love us in a very special way - the s...	Iamhere	2	618	Jul 22, 2016 by hotrod
	it is going to be fine (Preview) I am a little anxious but excited. For some reason I couldn't reply to my last post. It was frustrating but I am OK. I will post tomorrow after the party. Just want to make sure I thank the ones that posted. I will keep your supportive comments in mind. Thanks to all of you for supporting me all these years. I...	Hoot Nanny	4	582	Jul 22, 2016 by Hoot Nanny
	ISOLATION (Preview) Ive heard that alcoholics/addicts want to isolate their families. What is this about, what is the theory/idea of it? Why does it work? Linsc	LinSC	7	944	Jul 22, 2016 by Bethany66
	Courage to Change (C2C) 7/21/16 (Preview) Today's reading is about Let Go and Let God! Before program, many of us thoughts others would cease to exist if we didn't help them, take care of them, lead them, etc. We often interfered in everyone's business and put our own needs to the side. We were willing to follow others around, clean up their m...	Iamhere	12	811	Jul 22, 2016 by Iamhere
	counting down... (Preview) OK so I am not in the moment projecting & making plans. I am so excited about my 50th birthday party. I hope that all this planning isn't too much for me. The party is on Saturday July 23rd. I have been planning for so long that it actually effected my sleep. I already have insomnia. But here is the kicke...	Hoot Nanny	6	615	Jul 22, 2016 by Maresie
	who banned my tablet ip some hours ago? (Preview) somehow after standing for myself and explaining myself to one of those moderators here why removing my posts from qouting older topics and forcing to start new topic of it, i discovered that my ip of my tablet is banned and i could not read this forum from my tablet....seriously does message of Al-An...	kadriliisa	12	892	Jul 22, 2016 by kadriliisa
	HELP! AH actively drinking & don't know how to detach. detachment active drinking resentment (Preview) So my AH is back to actively drinking. I've been going to F2F Al-Anon meetings weekly for the last 7 months. My AH has been attending AA on and off since January as well. He went about 3 months without drinking and then there'd be a slip here and there. The slips are happening more frequently in the past few...	SDB	13	8375	Jul 22, 2016 by Iamhere
	Alcoholic Father Help Me (Preview) I am a 18 year old kid feeling so many emotions. I have grown up in middle class suburban household with both my parents and a sibling a few years older than me. My "father" (I don't consider him my dad anymore, I will refer to him as Jason) is an alcoholic. My mom works part time and is a stay at home mom. Jason...	thedot1	9	2219	Jul 22, 2016 by Maresie
	Transitioning alone (Preview) I am "thinking" of moving to west coast of florida. Getting a trailer in a 55 + park. My life here is starting to unfold and i see an opening up ahead. I plan on keep working but i would like to travel and rv it. I will be 60 this year. I like it out west a lot Too. My mother still looms over my head, thats a great...	Mirandac	18	972	Jul 21, 2016 by Mirandac
	Losing "couple" friends (Preview) I am very sad to see that over time it has become more and more difficult to get together with friends and family that we have hung with as couples or groups. My AH with enough alcohol becomes sarcastic and insulting especially to the women. In my confronting days I would frequently tell him that he just...	El	14	1254	Jul 21, 2016 by El
	ACoA sourcebook (Preview) I am currently reading the complete ACOA source book by Woititz. I have ended up reading it not only wiht a pen in my hand, but a highlighter.... wow... I have notes and highlights and I have devoured half it in a week!!!!! Has this woman been following me around??? The chapter on the Myths is just ammaa...	Lindaoakford	7	930	Jul 21, 2016 by hotrod
	Posting into older topics? (Preview) Quite new here- but not new to al anon or acoa - and got into quoting answering into older topics what interested me and maybe possibly someone else in future and one moderstor deleted them....which is very rude ....in order to wasting MY time in future where are the rules to posting into older topic...	kadriliisa	2	667	Jul 21, 2016 by kadriliisa
	9 Months Pregnant and Facing the Lowest Time (Preview) Hi, This is my first post to any addiction forum, but I would love some insight and perspective from others who are going through similar situations or have already been through these tough times. My husband is currently in rehab for his Oxycontin/Heroin addiction, and is 6 weeks in. This is his first...	graceforlove	12	912	Jul 20, 2016 by Jen61
	Surprise gifts and stuff. (Preview) So last weekend sir drinksalot took us out for our birthday and he was really pretty awesome. He kept himself nice, didn't drink a lot all weekend, and then went home with the obvious intent of getting hammered, which is not my business as long as he isn't doing it at my house. It was kind of a big deal as in 1...	missmeliss	18	1144	Jul 20, 2016 by KT2015
	Courage to change 20/7 (Preview) Today's C2C speaks of joy, and how difficult it is for many of us to enjoy when it makes it's infrequent appearances in our lives. Many of us are desperate to cling on to happy moments when they come around- afraid they will be snatched away- and start obsessing over ways to 'freeze time" or make it a repea...	missmeliss	2	680	Jul 20, 2016 by hotrod
	Rough Night (Preview) So last night my husband came home angrier than ever. He would speak to noone and left after taking a shower. While he was gone a friend of ours stopped by and shared a secret he has been keeping since June. My husband cheated on me during a school trip with my son. I was instantly hurt and mad. I knew the mom a...	Getbacktome19	2	596	Jul 20, 2016 by hotrod
	the ins & outs (Preview) Just want to say that marriage is a roller coaster ride. Just for today I am finding the reconciliation process has been slow in coming. We have to work on ourselves & each other. Went to the ER on Saturday over very sensitive issues. I am recovering from that & stress caused by my lack of sleep....	Hoot Nanny	4	596	Jul 20, 2016 by Mirandac
	a family of addicts and a mother that enables (Preview) Our relationship is up and down and all around. When it is good it is everything i have ever wanted....but when it is not....well it is pure hell. Not only am i dealing with an alcoholic who i try to keep in a calm state of mind so he only drinks moderately for the day but i am up against his hateful crazy fa...	lisad67	7	838	Jul 20, 2016 by el-cee
	Telling the children?? (Preview) Any advice on how to tell my 10 and 7 year olds their dad is an alcoholic? We separated almost a year ago and he has been in a downward spiral ever since. He is now in a hospital after attempted suicide. They don't know anything and don't ask much about him as he wasn't able to stay sober to make the visits. I al...	frogswim	2	612	Jul 19, 2016 by Jerry F
	Detaching (Preview) Long story short, I have been in recovery from alcohol for 9 years and also an adult child of an alcoholic. Recently, I met a member of Aa who went on to become a dear friend, someone I learned to trust which has been huge for me. Our friendship took a romantic path shortly after I discovered some repressed...	Startanew86	7	703	Jul 19, 2016 by Jerry F
	Setting boundaries what is acceptable and what is not? (Preview) I find myself coming back.. Thank you again to all of you that offered service to me recently.. Following a day of quiet with my children yesterday I resolved my day by thinking about how I can change the things that are pressing at the moment. What is it that is causing me most frustration and why.. He...	Anastasia	9	824	Jul 19, 2016 by Iamhere
	... Whether to walk away or try harder. (Preview) "One of the hardest decision you'll ever face in life is choosing whether to walk away or try harder." I feel the need to share my story with somebody who understands. I will try to make it as short as possible. Even though I am sure each of our stories could make a novel, if not a trilogy. I would appreci...	Tivi123	30	3915	Jul 19, 2016 by Jerry F
	Hope for Today 7/19 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Today's reading is about the expectation we have that other people (or one other person) will be able to meet all of our needs-- without us even having to ask! It reminds me of the argument we have seen played out in sitcoms over the years: a couple is arguing and one (usually the ma...	yanksfan51	2	652	Jul 19, 2016 by Iamhere
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.