Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

I'm hoping sharing about this will help. I realize we all have our stuff but last night and this morning I've had a bit of trouble embracing that rationalization concerning my recovering abf and sponsor. I feel hurt about how each of them treated me last night. My sponsor brought up a politically hot t...

Curlyblu · Curlyblu

AH is currently in a not drinking state. At least not at home, and isn't coming home slurring his words drunk....drinks are possible but don't know for sure, nor do I care at the moment. Because his current state of drinks or no drinks hasn't effected me negatively. Or so I thought. As each of these "new...

pumkin26 · pumkin26

I have been with my Alcoholic spouse for 8+ years (we have two young beautiful boys) and somewhere in the midst of life he became an alcoholic. I would say it started around 2-3 years ago, but it was a slow process. It hit me about 6 months ago that he was indeed an alcoholic and me his biggest enabler. Spend...

hotrod · hotrod

In keeping with the Seventh Tradition that states "Every group should be self supporting", the MIP transition committee, voted to solicit contributions from each MIP Board to clear a billing from the Vendor that hosts the Miracle in Progress Boards . This billing indicates that ther...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page encourages us to put the focus on ourselves as we give thought to what we share at meetings, particularly when there are newcomers. Do we share our Experience, Strength, and Hope? Will the new arrivals who are desperate, lonely and seeking answers feel they have landed in the right plac...

jitsuka · jitsuka

As the title says really. I wish the A in my life was dead, it would be a better existence than this for me.

Jayla · Jayla

What do you do when you NEED to set a boundary but you just can't because of the repercussions that would result? There is one particular behavior my AH does that (still) just infuriates me. I have read enough on here and also just feel in myself that that means I need to set a boundary regarding that behav...

Curlyblu · Curlyblu

I have seen this quote a few times on here... Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. Lori Deschene. So powerful. I can tell myself one simple word.....pause...

JLR4678 · JLR4678

I am new here, and haven't been to any Al Anon meetings. I have been with my bf for 12 years. We actually met at an AA meeting (I am a recovering addict/alcoholic as well). The first two years were wonderful but he relapsed and has been in and out of recovery ever since. We've been in this vicious cycle for th...

David C · David C

Hello Everyone, This is my first time posting and first time reaching out to others to talk about my boyfriends addiction and disease with Alcohol. I didn't know about it for the first 7 months but found out in October when he was acting a little strange when he came over. Found the bottle in his bag and c...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

As you know, we have a transition team working on saving 12stepforums.net website. I was able to get ahold of John's son today and he is going to be working with us. Just in case we do not get the transfer done in time (we should but always good to be cautious) please send an email to the new site email addre...

Curlyblu · Curlyblu

A new day and again I am amazed at how much more I see. And not more about my AH, about me. I see how this all really was affecting me. I noticed I took on the "I don't care" state of mind. I didn't care if I left my home in utter shambles. No one else cares why should I! Small things I let slide became mountains I th...

Curlyblu · Curlyblu

What do you say to your spouse when you come home from work and they are already drunk? How do you carry on a conversation like it's just another day. I'm learning to detach myself from the drinking and my biggest challenge at the moment is knowing when to keep my mouth shut. Even though I'm extremely mad t...

Tannersmom · Tannersmom

I'm supposed to take AS to dinner tonight. His AGF is off from work and he wants her to come. I don't want to see her but if she can't come he will get angry. My husband will also be very angry with me if I let her come. He was just starting to reach out to me again. Any experiences you can share to help me would be a...

magicmaker · magicmaker

Hello, I am new to this board and I'm hoping to gain a better understanding of a man that I have met in a romantic capacity. We met 6 months ago and at that time he was about 4 months into sobriety. Fast forward to now and he is 9 months sober and I'm trying to understand his emotions, which have been all over t...

Charlotte22 · Charlotte22

Well, I am working on the Third Step BIG TIME right now as my Alcoholic father just died of liver disease but he made it to 86! We did not have any closure but there were some good moments with us after a long time of no contact. I am asking HP to heal my heart and his heart even in the spirit world. My ex husba...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Today's reading is about coming to terms with past experiences without getting stuck there. It's about reconciling things that have happened in order to move forward. In the second half of the reading, there is a mention of how while facing the feelings didn't change thing...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

(Still on the road, didn't label my snips of my daily; could be C2C) Living with an alcoholic, drinking or not, calls for patience, acceptance and resolution. How do we get that/those? Or more of them? Today's page suggests it is by rejecting emotional attachment with new or existing problems. Spec...

Jerry F · Jerry F

12th stepping, carrying the message with our ESH to those who follow and have the need of serenity, sobriety and sanity as John did. (((hugs)))

Jerry F · Jerry F

Celebrated it as I have the ones before it by trading in my former chip of 37 years and exchanged it for the one I will carry for the next year XXXVIII Mahalo Piha, Deep Gratitude for the AFG for leading me to the doors of recovery and out of the damage of our disease. What ever I have learned is freely giv...

IAmStrong · IAmStrong

There once was a vivacious life loving beautiful girl, Jessica. Oh how she loved people, her job as a Pharmacy Technician and her favorite place on earth, Disneyland! She grew up in this area, just a few miles from her home. Her roommate worked at the Magic Kingdom as well. Her boyfriend! Her mad...

DavidG · DavidG

...news is that John Freifield passed away three hours ago... ... not much more to say at this time... lets just close ranks, and deal with it... ...

JE235 · JE235

I recently decided to make the decision to tell my husband I will not be around him if he is drinking. I don't know if this is helping or hurting. We own a business together and right now I am missing a social event with our business partners because he said he's drinking there so I have to deal with it or not c...

Doingmybest · Doingmybest

I feels mixing family and business is a generally a BAD idea. Unfortunately, a sibling opening a high end "resale" store with virtually no help. She says it is her lifelong dream. She is also fully employed and plans to stay that way, leaving a less than optimal spouse to "run" the store (except for b...

Sorcha · Sorcha

So my alcoholic partner has been drinking for the last 3 weeks again. He is a binge drinker who drinks a bottle and a half of vodka a day when he hits it and goes downhill very rapidly these days. He is now in the phase of wanting to stop but not being able to even with medication prescribed by his doctor which...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for February 19 speaks about violence.. The reading suggests that while living with the disease of alcoholism, violence may be part of the equation and that living with the insanity many tend to deny or over look it . The reading tells the story of a woman who had been badly treate...

MissM · MissM

Today's c2c discusses how daily application of our al-anon program helps us to become more patient and tolerant towards other people. Partly, this comes about through examining our own inventories and beginning to recognise that the shortcomings we are so quick to point out in other people are ver...

John · John

https://youtu.be/SLwM-ujWtoc Jjohn

_bunny_ · _bunny_

For me, prayer is humbly asking my HP to guide me through my day. I willingly hand my whole day over because I have confidence my HP will answer all my prayers and has an amazing journey planned for me. My prayers are answered when I'm peaceful and serene, when my self will/ego is quiet and when I'm in the pr...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading compares alcoholism to a tornado - not only do we have to watch out for the wind, we also have to watch for what the wind may pick up and throw our direction. Alcoholism often brings along additional issues such as verbal, physical, sexual abuse, illness, debt, prison, infidelity and...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading talks about how our vision can be limited, and we can become focused on outcomes only we see. It's easy for us to forget that a Higher Power is not restricted to our logic, and many wondrous events grow out of what appear to be disasters. Faith is a marvelous gift!! Faith does take pract...

SaraLin · SaraLin

I broke up with alcoholic boyfriend this morning. He's been treating me really badly lately & constantly lying about drinking. I told him last night that eventually he will need to choose between getting himself help and having me in his life. He cracked open a beer at 7.30am this morning and I jus...

RL17 · RL17

Thank you to all who make this forum board what it is. I've found the step board, and am starting to work through Step 1. I've printed out the step and all the questions, and am reading through the replies. Woke up stressed after a nightmare about AH this morning, and found comfort in the board. This i...

Tannersmom · Tannersmom

Excuse me if I ramble. I just can't get my thoughts in order. I hadn't heard from my son in weeks. I was starting to get a bit unnerved. Last we had talked he was having BP and HR problems and I was worried. My ex and I decided to send an email telling him he had to call (not text) us by noon the next day or we w...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's page asks us to think about approaching our AlAnon recovery program as we would if we were learning a new language... because in fact we are. Most don't get to the point of fluently speaking another language casually. Immersion is often recommended, where we surround ourselves with those w...

RL17 · RL17

My husband is away at rehab, and will be coming home in a week. He's doing amazing, and is so positive and determined. I guess I just need to hear some positive stories from people who have had things work out, and the husband stayed sober, and things got better. So far, I'm terrified from stories I've...

kari · kari

Teens substance abuse has made fme feel socially uneasy. I didn't grow up with this and it feel bad.

KT2015 · KT2015

Hi Everyone, I wanted to drop by and wish everyone a very happy valentine's day. I haven't been around the board much but I have been working my program a lot with my sponsor. I have been working step four and it's been difficult to do that so I'm taking it slowly. This valentine's day helped me reflect...

hotrod · hotrod

HI Everyone Mary Posted this message to the Business section of the Alanon Forum. I transferred it Hope for Today Feb 14Permalink Reply Quote More Good morning Everyone- Today's reading is about the importance of listening, and the value of being heard. The strength in our meetings often is f...

thekentuckygent · thekentuckygent

ABF is not responding well to my detaching and not engaging any longer in arguments. This morning he left to drive home (1 1/2 hours away), and said that I was about to learn what real pain felt like because he was never going to speak to me again. I know this is the disease talking, and while every fiber i...

thekentuckygent · thekentuckygent

Happy Valentines Day all! ABF (currently not going to meetings and trying the whole few drinks here and there because he has "control" thing) asked if I wanted him to pick up a bottle of champagne on the way to celebrate with. I told him no, that I wouldn't tell him what to do in regards to his drinking but I...

tealfighter · tealfighter

I want to start with all the positive. I am getting ready to attend my second meeting this Tuesday. I have read half of the book How Al-Anon works waiting for my Courage to Change to come in the mail. I am defiantly making some progress. For that I have much hope and joy. I also got a journal to begin to write i...

Michelle26 · Michelle26

Hi everyone. I'm a newbie to Al Anon. This is my first dealings with it. My husband is currently in rehab. Just 4 days now. He did make this decision on his own. I honestly don't know exactly how long his program will last for him and nor does he at this time. We've only just spoken yesterday. I fou...

El · El

Hello and happy Saturday to all! I have some progress to report for myself....and I guess it boils down to the word acceptance. I accept that the only thing that can change AH is AH and his higher power. AH was recently diagnosed with yet another health issue related to alcohol. After the doctor visi...

Supportseek3 · Supportseek3

I am looking for support groups that deal with loved ones with addiction. I am trying to be more informed.

lookingup · lookingup

Still wanting,trying to decide on moving from my home here which I'm renting, great landlord,all my maintenance is done when I need it .lived here 14 yrs,finished raising my son here now he married him n his wife moved to another town an 45 min. Drive from me. ive put a lot of work into this house over the y...

madowl86 · madowl86

So sad and depressed tonight after learning my ABF (ex ABF?) is talking to another girl. At this point I'm pretty certain he's playing both sides of the fence and the girl won't talk to me. I am going crazy over not seeing the messages he has sent to her. I returned all his belongings but am having a VERY har...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

Been sorting and packing for another move to my boyfriend,s house. Came across some notes to myself just 1 yr into my relationship with my XAH. How could i be so stupid. I saw the red flags then and should have heeded them but i didnt. I went ahead and stayed with the guy and endured 25 yrs of misery before i...

Godsdaughter · Godsdaughter

Hi I am new here and I am planning on attending my first Al-Anon meeting this weekend. I am really nervous as I do not know what to really expect. My AH has been physically abusive 3 times in the last 7 years while drunk. My problem is he is trying to win me back and I gave him two choices to move out in 30 days or g...

Godsdaughter · Godsdaughter

I have posted before in regards to attending my 1st meeting...now i attempted to go last night but it was cancelled. The next one by me is this Sunday. I already knew in my head that my AH would have a fit cause Sundays we have a routine of church then laundry and home. Well the time i would need to attend a mee...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

AlAnon encourages us to consider our role in the unpleasantness at home...and it would be a very rare case that the alcoholic was responsible for it all in its entirety. Today's page acknowledges that it is a difficult, but entirely necessary part of our recovery. A look at our motives behind what we s...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODA T reading for February 12 asks the question what happens when the ideas that we receive at an Al-Anon meeting seem to roll off our consciousness and asks why are we not demonstrate these ideas in or every day actions? Why cant we absorb them and make them work for us.? The reading suggests t...

lookingup · lookingup

Another beautiful sun shiny day ,birds singing outside my window, i picked yellow buttercups out of my yard put in vase on my table. my hp is great,he knows me and my needs. im very grateful for hp and this 70 and 80 degree weather. in the middle of winter.i know this aint right,strange ,weird weather.l...

Charlotte22 · Charlotte22

Hi Everyone, I have been in recovery for over 10 years. In the past 7 months I have gone through a true "dark night of the Soul" and I am working with a jungian who says that it sometimes happens on the Spiritual path. There is a lot about it on You Tube but I would really like to connect with others who have g...

Munch · Munch

Why do alcoholics isolate themselves? AND the people they claim to love, and care about? When he moved upstairs into our vacant apartment, his reason was that he just needed his own space for awhile...to do his own thing. As near as I can tell, his 'own thing' is watching TV and drinking. Just like he...

Aerin · Aerin

"My power comes in giving MYSELF what I need. No longer looking to others, outside of myself to get my sense of security. I cannot trust the alcoholics in my life. ï¿½However, I CAN TRUST MYSELF... the guide within me always.... I can listen to.... I can trust... and I can nurture that guide. ï¿½Al-an...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading in Courage to Change discusses how we can and should use creativity to celebrate who we are and what we feel. One of the effects of the disease is many of us have denied or devalued our talents, feelings, achievements and desires. We learn in recovery to know, appreciate and express o...

Tannersmom · Tannersmom

I finally texted my AS yesterday, told him that if he didn't call me (not text) by noon today that I was going to call in for a well check. He called me at 5:30 this morning. He was very angry at first telling me that if the cops came it would mess up this living situation. Hmmm, what does that mean? Oh that m...

pinkchip · pinkchip

I choose to write this due to seeing a few exasperated new members here asking themselves this question. The reasons I am about to list are an accumulation of things I've heard in alanon over the years, stuff I've seen from working in treatment/rehab, and my own experience of having had a long relation...

LinSC · LinSC

1. So what is this blame thing about, the alcoholic/addict always wants to blame everyone else for their sorrows? 2. And what should be our response to this verbally and otherwise? I was married to a dry alcoholic and he was always blaming everyone else for his situation, he blamed the government, t...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Just Hurt and Working Through It (Preview) I'm hoping sharing about this will help. I realize we all have our stuff but last night and this morning I've had a bit of trouble embracing that rationalization concerning my recovering abf and sponsor. I feel hurt about how each of them treated me last night. My sponsor brought up a politically hot t...	tiredtonite	12	902	Feb 24, 2017 by 2accept
	The what ifs (Preview) AH is currently in a not drinking state. At least not at home, and isn't coming home slurring his words drunk....drinks are possible but don't know for sure, nor do I care at the moment. Because his current state of drinks or no drinks hasn't effected me negatively. Or so I thought. As each of these "new...	Curlyblu	7	658	Feb 23, 2017 by Stan1
	Tyring to take it One Day at a Time (Preview) I have been with my Alcoholic spouse for 8+ years (we have two young beautiful boys) and somewhere in the midst of life he became an alcoholic. I would say it started around 2-3 years ago, but it was a slow process. It hit me about 6 months ago that he was indeed an alcoholic and me his biggest enabler. Spend...	pumkin26	18	720	Feb 23, 2017 by pumkin26
	7 th tradition contributions needed to support MiP (Preview) In keeping with the Seventh Tradition that states "Every group should be self supporting", the MIP transition committee, voted to solicit contributions from each MIP Board to clear a billing from the Vendor that hosts the Miracle in Progress Boards . This billing indicates that ther...	hotrod	15	884	Feb 23, 2017 by Iamhere
	2/22/17 One Day at a Time in AlAnon (ODAT) (Preview) Today's page encourages us to put the focus on ourselves as we give thought to what we share at meetings, particularly when there are newcomers. Do we share our Experience, Strength, and *Hope*? Will the new arrivals who are desperate, lonely and seeking answers feel they have landed in the right plac...	Enigmatic	5	607	Feb 23, 2017 by Iamhere
	I just feel sad and depressed. (Preview) As the title says really. I wish the A in my life was dead, it would be a better existence than this for me.	jitsuka	16	5119	Feb 23, 2017 by jitsuka
	Boundary Needed (Preview) What do you do when you NEED to set a boundary but you just can't because of the repercussions that would result? There is one particular behavior my AH does that (still) just infuriates me. I have read enough on here and also just feel in myself that that means I need to set a boundary regarding that behav...	Jayla	7	667	Feb 23, 2017 by Enigmatic
	The pause (Preview) I have seen this quote a few times on here... Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. Lori Deschene. So powerful. I can tell myself one simple word.....pause...	Curlyblu	4	1690	Feb 22, 2017 by Iamhere
	New here. Desperate for any support/advice on ending 12 year relationship (Preview) I am new here, and haven't been to any Al Anon meetings. I have been with my bf for 12 years. We actually met at an AA meeting (I am a recovering addict/alcoholic as well). The first two years were wonderful but he relapsed and has been in and out of recovery ever since. We've been in this vicious cycle for th...	JLR4678	3	551	Feb 22, 2017 by Iamhere
	New Here (Preview) Hello Everyone, This is my first time posting and first time reaching out to others to talk about my boyfriends addiction and disease with Alcohol. I didn't know about it for the first 7 months but found out in October when he was acting a little strange when he came over. Found the bottle in his bag and c...	David C	4	517	Feb 22, 2017 by Iamhere
	Saving the Site (Preview) As you know, we have a transition team working on saving 12stepforums.net website. I was able to get ahold of John's son today and he is going to be working with us. Just in case we do not get the transfer done in time (we should but always good to be cautious) please send an email to the new site email addre...	kismetstrand	4	741	Feb 22, 2017 by kismetstrand
	Accepting has opened my eyes for me to see (Preview) A new day and again I am amazed at how much more I see. And not more about my AH, about me. I see how this all really was affecting me. I noticed I took on the "I don't care" state of mind. I didn't care if I left my home in utter shambles. No one else cares why should I! Small things I let slide became mountains I th...	Curlyblu	3	548	Feb 22, 2017 by hotrod
	What do you say.... ( 1 2 ) (Preview) What do you say to your spouse when you come home from work and they are already drunk? How do you carry on a conversation like it's just another day. I'm learning to detach myself from the drinking and my biggest challenge at the moment is knowing when to keep my mouth shut. Even though I'm extremely mad t...	Curlyblu	41	1366	Feb 22, 2017 by jitsuka
	Please any experiences that might help (Preview) I'm supposed to take AS to dinner tonight. His AGF is off from work and he wants her to come. I don't want to see her but if she can't come he will get angry. My husband will also be very angry with me if I let her come. He was just starting to reach out to me again. Any experiences you can share to help me would be a...	Tannersmom	5	607	Feb 21, 2017 by a4l
	Recovering Alcoholic and Emotions (Preview) Hello, I am new to this board and I'm hoping to gain a better understanding of a man that I have met in a romantic capacity. We met 6 months ago and at that time he was about 4 months into sobriety. Fast forward to now and he is 9 months sober and I'm trying to understand his emotions, which have been all over t...	magicmaker	7	700	Feb 21, 2017 by Jerry F
	Letting Go and Letting God...really working on it! (Preview) Well, I am working on the Third Step BIG TIME right now as my Alcoholic father just died of liver disease but he made it to 86! We did not have any closure but there were some good moments with us after a long time of no contact. I am asking HP to heal my heart and his heart even in the spirit world. My ex husba...	Charlotte22	4	736	Feb 21, 2017 by shrnp
	Hope for Today Feb 21 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Today's reading is about coming to terms with past experiences without getting stuck there. It's about reconciling things that have happened in order to move forward. In the second half of the reading, there is a mention of how while facing the feelings didn't change thing...	yanksfan51	3	663	Feb 21, 2017 by _bunny_
	2-20-17 ONe Day at a Time (I think) (Preview) (Still on the road, didn't label my snips of my daily; could be C2C) Living with an alcoholic, drinking or not, calls for patience, acceptance and resolution. How do we get that/those? Or more of them? Today's page suggests it is by rejecting emotional attachment with new or existing problems. Spec...	Enigmatic	5	514	Feb 20, 2017 by Iamhere
	We can and will carry on (Preview) 12th stepping, carrying the message with our ESH to those who follow and have the need of serenity, sobriety and sanity as John did. (((hugs)))	Jerry F	9	802	Feb 20, 2017 by 1911A1
	Anniversary ... (Preview) Celebrated it as I have the ones before it by trading in my former chip of 37 years and exchanged it for the one I will carry for the next year XXXVIII Mahalo Piha, Deep Gratitude for the AFG for leading me to the doors of recovery and out of the damage of our disease. What ever I have learned is freely giv...	Jerry F	11	841	Feb 19, 2017 by el-cee
	A Story (Preview) There once was a vivacious life loving beautiful girl, Jessica. Oh how she loved people, her job as a Pharmacy Technician and her favorite place on earth, Disneyland! She grew up in this area, just a few miles from her home. Her roommate worked at the Magic Kingdom as well. Her boyfriend! Her mad...	IAmStrong	6	610	Feb 19, 2017 by a4l
	The sad news about John... freed at last... (Preview) ...news is that John Freifield passed away three hours ago... ... not much more to say at this time... lets just close ranks, and deal with it... ...	DavidG	27	1215	Feb 19, 2017 by lgnutah
	Won't Be around him if he's drinking (Preview) I recently decided to make the decision to tell my husband I will not be around him if he is drinking. I don't know if this is helping or hurting. We own a business together and right now I am missing a social event with our business partners because he said he's drinking there so I have to deal with it or not c...	JE235	5	616	Feb 19, 2017 by Curlyblu
	*super long post - sibling issues* (Preview) I feels mixing family and business is a generally a BAD idea. Unfortunately, a sibling opening a high end "resale" store with virtually no help. She says it is her lifelong dream. She is also fully employed and plans to stay that way, leaving a less than optimal spouse to "run" the store (except for b...	Doingmybest	9	710	Feb 19, 2017 by lookingup
	The drinking is in progress again (Preview) So my alcoholic partner has been drinking for the last 3 weeks again. He is a binge drinker who drinks a bottle and a half of vodka a day when he hits it and goes downhill very rapidly these days. He is now in the phase of wanting to stop but not being able to even with medication prescribed by his doctor which...	Sorcha	4	702	Feb 19, 2017 by Iamhere
	ODAT Reading 2-19-2017 (Preview) The ODAT reading for February 19 speaks about violence.. The reading suggests that while living with the disease of alcoholism, violence may be part of the equation and that living with the insanity many tend to deny or over look it . The reading tells the story of a woman who had been badly treate...	hotrod	4	777	Feb 19, 2017 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change 18/2 (Preview) Today's c2c discusses how daily application of our al-anon program helps us to become more patient and tolerant towards other people. Partly, this comes about through examining our own inventories and beginning to recognise that the shortcomings we are so quick to point out in other people are ver...	MissM	2	588	Feb 18, 2017 by MeTwo2
	Video I made about 7-8 yrs ago. (Preview) https://youtu.be/SLwM-ujWtoc Jjohn	John	9	837	Feb 18, 2017 by lookingup
	Prayers and answers (Preview) For me, prayer is humbly asking my HP to guide me through my day. I willingly hand my whole day over because I have confidence my HP will answer all my prayers and has an amazing journey planned for me. My prayers are answered when I'm peaceful and serene, when my self will/ego is quiet and when I'm in the pr...	_bunny_	3	697	Feb 18, 2017 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change (C2C) 2/16/17 (Preview) Today's reading compares alcoholism to a tornado - not only do we have to watch out for the wind, we also have to watch for what the wind may pick up and throw our direction. Alcoholism often brings along additional issues such as verbal, physical, sexual abuse, illness, debt, prison, infidelity and...	Iamhere	4	890	Feb 17, 2017 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change (C2C) 2/17/17 (Preview) Today's reading talks about how our vision can be limited, and we can become focused on outcomes only we see. It's easy for us to forget that a Higher Power is not restricted to our logic, and many wondrous events grow out of what appear to be disasters. Faith is a marvelous gift!! Faith does take pract...	Iamhere	1	554	Feb 17, 2017 by hotrod
	I've ended it (Preview) I broke up with alcoholic boyfriend this morning. He's been treating me really badly lately & constantly lying about drinking. I told him last night that eventually he will need to choose between getting himself help and having me in his life. He cracked open a beer at 7.30am this morning and I jus...	SaraLin	2	621	Feb 17, 2017 by Iamhere
	Just want to say THANK YOU!! (Preview) Thank you to all who make this forum board what it is. I've found the step board, and am starting to work through Step 1. I've printed out the step and all the questions, and am reading through the replies. Woke up stressed after a nightmare about AH this morning, and found comfort in the board. This i...	RL17	5	601	Feb 17, 2017 by Suburban Denizen
	A night out (Preview) Excuse me if I ramble. I just can't get my thoughts in order. I hadn't heard from my son in weeks. I was starting to get a bit unnerved. Last we had talked he was having BP and HR problems and I was worried. My ex and I decided to send an email telling him he had to call (not text) us by noon the next day or we w...	Tannersmom	3	627	Feb 16, 2017 by El
	2/15/17 Courage to Change (Preview) Today's page asks us to think about approaching our AlAnon recovery program as we would if we were learning a new language... because in fact we are. Most don't get to the point of fluently speaking another language casually. Immersion is often recommended, where we surround ourselves with those w...	Enigmatic	6	661	Feb 16, 2017 by Iamhere
	Needing positive stories (Preview) My husband is away at rehab, and will be coming home in a week. He's doing amazing, and is so positive and determined. I guess I just need to hear some positive stories from people who have had things work out, and the husband stayed sober, and things got better. So far, I'm terrified from stories I've...	RL17	14	2351	Feb 15, 2017 by RL17
	Teens Substance use and abuse (Preview) Teens substance abuse has made fme feel socially uneasy. I didn't grow up with this and it feel bad.	kari	3	2362	Feb 14, 2017 by kari
	Happy Valentine's Day (Preview) Hi Everyone, I wanted to drop by and wish everyone a very happy valentine's day. I haven't been around the board much but I have been working my program a lot with my sponsor. I have been working step four and it's been difficult to do that so I'm taking it slowly. This valentine's day helped me reflect...	KT2015	6	665	Feb 14, 2017 by lookingup
	HOPE For Today 2-14 (Preview) HI Everyone Mary Posted this message to the Business section of the Alanon Forum. I transferred it Hope for Today Feb 14Permalink Reply Quote More Good morning Everyone- Today's reading is about the importance of listening, and the value of being heard. The strength in our meetings often is f...	hotrod	4	568	Feb 14, 2017 by DavidG
	To Reach Out or Not, That is The Question (Preview) ABF is not responding well to my detaching and not engaging any longer in arguments. This morning he left to drive home (1 1/2 hours away), and said that I was about to learn what real pain felt like because he was never going to speak to me again. I know this is the disease talking, and while every fiber i...	thekentuckygent	5	637	Feb 14, 2017 by kaotob
	ABF Asked Me to Drink With Him (Preview) Happy Valentines Day all! ABF (currently not going to meetings and trying the whole few drinks here and there because he has "control" thing) asked if I wanted him to pick up a bottle of champagne on the way to celebrate with. I told him no, that I wouldn't tell him what to do in regards to his drinking but I...	thekentuckygent	3	641	Feb 14, 2017 by Iamhere
	Emotional Abuse (Preview) I want to start with all the positive. I am getting ready to attend my second meeting this Tuesday. I have read half of the book How Al-Anon works waiting for my Courage to Change to come in the mail. I am defiantly making some progress. For that I have much hope and joy. I also got a journal to begin to write i...	tealfighter	6	758	Feb 14, 2017 by SerenityRUS
	Husband coming home from rehab soon and I'm new to Al Anon (Preview) Hi everyone. I'm a newbie to Al Anon. This is my first dealings with it. My husband is currently in rehab. Just 4 days now. He did make this decision on his own. I honestly don't know exactly how long his program will last for him and nor does he at this time. We've only just spoken yesterday. I fou...	Michelle26	5	711	Feb 14, 2017 by Jazzie18
	Acceptance (Preview) Hello and happy Saturday to all! I have some progress to report for myself....and I guess it boils down to the word acceptance. I accept that the only thing that can change AH is AH and his higher power. AH was recently diagnosed with yet another health issue related to alcohol. After the doctor visi...	El	4	581	Feb 14, 2017 by KT2015
	Seeking support (Preview) I am looking for support groups that deal with loved ones with addiction. I am trying to be more informed.	Supportseek3	2	531	Feb 14, 2017 by Iamhere
	Options and choices,ugh (Preview) Still wanting,trying to decide on moving from my home here which I'm renting, great landlord,all my maintenance is done when I need it .lived here 14 yrs,finished raising my son here now he married him n his wife moved to another town an 45 min. Drive from me. ive put a lot of work into this house over the y...	lookingup	7	680	Feb 13, 2017 by lookingup
	Found out ABF talking to someone else (Preview) So sad and depressed tonight after learning my ABF (ex ABF?) is talking to another girl. At this point I'm pretty certain he's playing both sides of the fence and the girl won't talk to me. I am going crazy over not seeing the messages he has sent to her. I returned all his belongings but am having a VERY har...	madowl86	5	583	Feb 13, 2017 by LinSC
	regrets, ive had a few (Preview) Been sorting and packing for another move to my boyfriend,s house. Came across some notes to myself just 1 yr into my relationship with my XAH. How could i be so stupid. I saw the red flags then and should have heeded them but i didnt. I went ahead and stayed with the guy and endured 25 yrs of misery before i...	YARNCRAZY	4	638	Feb 13, 2017 by hotrod
	Nervous-1st Time at Al-Anon meeting coming up! (Preview) Hi I am new here and I am planning on attending my first Al-Anon meeting this weekend. I am really nervous as I do not know what to really expect. My AH has been physically abusive 3 times in the last 7 years while drunk. My problem is he is trying to win me back and I gave him two choices to move out in 30 days or g...	Godsdaughter	30	792	Feb 13, 2017 by Iamhere
	AH not accepting Change... (Preview) I have posted before in regards to attending my 1st meeting...now i attempted to go last night but it was cancelled. The next one by me is this Sunday. I already knew in my head that my AH would have a fit cause Sundays we have a routine of church then laundry and home. Well the time i would need to attend a mee...	Godsdaughter	2	560	Feb 13, 2017 by Jerry F
	One Day at a Time in AlAnon (ODAT) 2/13/17 (Preview) AlAnon encourages us to consider our role in the unpleasantness at home...and it would be a very rare case that the alcoholic was responsible for it all in its entirety. Today's page acknowledges that it is a difficult, but entirely necessary part of our recovery. A look at our motives behind what we s...	Enigmatic	4	578	Feb 13, 2017 by tiredtonite
	ODAT Reading 2-12-2017 (Preview) The ODA T reading for February 12 asks the question what happens when the ideas that we receive at an Al-Anon meeting seem to roll off our consciousness and asks why are we not demonstrate these ideas in or every day actions? Why cant we absorb them and make them work for us.? The reading suggests t...	hotrod	2	559	Feb 12, 2017 by Iamhere
	Grateful (Preview) Another beautiful sun shiny day ,birds singing outside my window, i picked yellow buttercups out of my yard put in vase on my table. my hp is great,he knows me and my needs. im very grateful for hp and this 70 and 80 degree weather. in the middle of winter.i know this aint right,strange ,weird weather.l...	lookingup	6	601	Feb 12, 2017 by Iamhere
	Has Anyone Been Through a True Dark Night of Soul in Recovery? (Preview) Hi Everyone, I have been in recovery for over 10 years. In the past 7 months I have gone through a true "dark night of the Soul" and I am working with a jungian who says that it sometimes happens on the Spiritual path. There is a lot about it on You Tube but I would really like to connect with others who have g...	Charlotte22	2	629	Feb 12, 2017 by Jerry F
	Isolation (Preview) Why do alcoholics isolate themselves? AND the people they claim to love, and care about? When he moved upstairs into our vacant apartment, his reason was that he just needed his own space for awhile...to do his own thing. As near as I can tell, his 'own thing' is watching TV and drinking. Just like he...	Munch	3	744	Feb 11, 2017 by Jerry F
	Proud of Me but Still Unsure (Preview) "My power comes in giving MYSELF what I need. No longer looking to others, outside of myself to get my sense of security. I cannot trust the alcoholics in my life. ï¿½However, I CAN TRUST MYSELF... the guide within me always.... I can listen to.... I can trust... and I can nurture that guide. ï¿½Al-an...	Aerin	3	619	Feb 11, 2017 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change (C2C) 2/10/17 (Preview) Today's reading in Courage to Change discusses how we can and should use creativity to celebrate who we are and what we feel. One of the effects of the disease is many of us have denied or devalued our talents, feelings, achievements and desires. We learn in recovery to know, appreciate and express o...	Iamhere	3	612	Feb 11, 2017 by Iamhere
	I did what I did for me and hopefully him update (Preview) I finally texted my AS yesterday, told him that if he didn't call me (not text) by noon today that I was going to call in for a well check. He called me at 5:30 this morning. He was very angry at first telling me that if the cops came it would mess up this living situation. Hmmm, what does that mean? Oh that m...	Tannersmom	3	583	Feb 11, 2017 by Iamhere
	Why stay in a relationship with an alcoholic? ( 1 2 ) (Preview) I choose to write this due to seeing a few exasperated new members here asking themselves this question. The reasons I am about to list are an accumulation of things I've heard in alanon over the years, stuff I've seen from working in treatment/rehab, and my own experience of having had a long relation...	pinkchip	43	3171	Feb 11, 2017 by pinkchip
	The Blame Thing (Preview) 1. So what is this blame thing about, the alcoholic/addict always wants to blame everyone else for their sorrows? 2. And what should be our response to this verbally and otherwise? I was married to a dry alcoholic and he was always blaming everyone else for his situation, he blamed the government, t...	LinSC	10	1219	Feb 11, 2017 by pinkchip
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.