The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My son's friend decided (while under the influence) that his addiction was too much to handle. While in the depths of his drunken state of mind felt that by taking a gun to his own head he could end the pain of his demons the ones that haunted him daily.
Oddly, strangly, curiously the face book page that had only days before been his, lit up with messages from those who knew him. Comments ranging from "Way to find a permanate solution to a temporary problem." Words like ..."The ultimate show of selfishness." to you will forever be missed.
He leaves behind him parents who loved him siblings who will forever miss him. Friends who will always wonder if they could have made a difference.
Saddness befalls the universe when a life is cut short ..when the disease wins..when friends and family are left asking..how could it have been avoided.
This message comes with no judgement, no admonishment merely pain, saddness and hurt knowing it could have been any of our loved ones and has been.
Tonight friends and family stand in shock and sorrow. Although he had his disease, depression and fought mental illness a lifetime..many will forever feel as if they have been amputated by covert actions.
Such a tragic waste.
Such a massive loss.
A young man who was beyond talented, gifted, intelligent and artistic never realized his full potential.
It's sad that his friends had to post those statements on his facebook page. It truly shows that they didn't understand his addiction or his depression.
__________________
I can Overcome all things through my HP who strengthens me.
Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
I was and still can be very judgmental. A friend of mine killed herself a few years ago. On the last occasion I saw her I begged her to get help. I went through the whole retinue of what she could do and how. She had tried it all. She had a little dog who she loved dearly. I know that dog saved her from suicide for years. That night she finally gave up. I don't actually see suicide as a selfish act. I think people who are in that spot are beyond despairing. Suicide becomes a tantalizing option and seems feasible. That's where their mind is. Sometimes I have to remember that when I'm on a train that's been stopped for hours because someone has thrown themselves under it (happened 6 times for me when I had a horrendous commute).
I knew my friend's psychiatrist and called them to give them the news. Normally I would have been thinking someone could have done more. Now I don't consider that. I think some people get lost.
I know when I came to al anon I was absolutely suicidal I felt lost beyond measure. I felt like I had no way out of where I was and whatever I did seemed fraught with pain.
I had no ability to sort through my choices. Every choice seemd to be a disaster. Since I left the ex A my life has been incredibly hard but I can't say I think about suicide much anymore.
Very sad indeed Peggy, and thanks for sharing - it means a lot, and helps keep the devastation of this awful disease in it's proper perspective..... Alcoholism/addiction really IS a life or death situation... Awful endings, like the one you described, are proof positive of this fact...
Take care
Tom
__________________
"He is either gonna drink, or he won't.... what are YOU gonna do?"
"What you think of me is none of my business"
"If you knew the answer to what you are worrying about, would it REALLY change anything?"
